#“i wanna make my murder look like a suicide” from cotards solution by will wood is such a good lyric title for this

[liixnt]

OKAY FIC IDEA: P!SCAR (or f!scar if you're martyn) KILLING HC8!SCAR BUT ITS LIKE THE AFTERMATH AND FROM THE POV OF BOATEM

i want to see the evolution of boatem going from "man i havent seen scar in a while" to "oh hes permadead" i want to know the fear of "alright. how. how the fuck did this happen, this is a server with RESPAWNS."

maybe you could sneak in watcher lore and grian/pearl thinks its the watchers but like. for once it isn't. it was someone else entirely (it was scar himself)

im so normal about this tidbit of lore and abt p!scar (lying) p!scar doesn't sail the seven seas. he sails the multiverse

[the83rdgenius]

| I Wanna Make My Murder Look Like A Suicide | 

Pairing: Diluc x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Dark content, Yandere, Yan!Diluc, Fem!Reader, Reader wears a dress, Diluc is your husband, Abuse, Manipulation, Reader is disabled, Reader uses a cane, Reader is referred to as Diluc’s ‘Wife’, Mentions of past forced feeding, Arranged Marriage, It is implied that reader’s family was abusive, Scratching (Reader), Diluc is very cruel in this, Kaeya appears towards the end, Dissociation, Reader has a mental breakdown, Stockholm Syndrome (? I’m unsure about this one ?), 4.6k Words. 

A/n: Reupload because I deleted this foasijfasodi but yeah idk I really just think yandere!Diluc is neat. Also, the title are lyrics from the song Cotard’s Solution by Will Wood and The Tapeworms.

Summary: When your family arranges a marriage with the wealthy owner of Dawn Winery, you jump at the first chance you can to escape your cruel family, but what new hell awaits you on the other side?

“Where do you think you’re going?” He asked in a cold tone. 

It threw you off for a moment but only briefly, because if there’s one thing you could promise yourself it’s that your husband, Diluc, would never harm you. But somehow you couldn’t help but clutch onto the fabric of your dress, the same one he gave you on your first wedding anniversary, hands shaking for some unknown reason.

“I was just going for a walk. Would you like to j-” He cut you off mid sentence, snapping at you in response.

“No, I don’t want to go anywhere and neither should you. It’s”— He checked his pocket watch before quickly tucking it back into his pocket— “Three in the morning and both of us should be heading to bed.” 

“But-” Before you could get another word in he’d grabbed your wrist and pulled you forward.

That was your cue that it was indeed time to end the night, in bed… with your husband. Your beloved husband who would never steer you astray. So, then why did you have this feeling in the pit of your stomach that something was terribly and unmistakably wrong? 

Soon the sun rose and pierced through the window of your bedroom, waking you up with its warm rays and urging you to get ready for the day. You didn’t have anywhere to go or anything to do exactly—to be fair you never did—but that never stopped you from looking your very best. So, you quickly put on a decent looking outfit, brushed your hair, and grabbed your cane. And just as you were about to descend down the stairs you saw the flower embroidered basket out of the corner of your eye. It always tempted you, or maybe taunted is the more appropriate word, and you decided against fighting your desires and instead hooked it over your free arm. 

You checked both ways before tip-toeing downstairs, hoping your walk was closer than it was last night. Closer and closer you came to the front door, you knew it was silly but you really wanted to take a walk and you couldn’t understand your husband’s rejections towards it. Your hand was on the bronze knob and you were just about to turn it when a hand placed itself on your shoulder. You jumped and looked to see who it was and to your surprise and relief, it was Adelinde. It made getting caught a little less scary and a lot more tedious, because you knew there was nothing you could do to keep her watchful eyes off of you. 

She smiled fondly, too fondly, and finally spoke. “You’re supposed to be resting. Come on, let’s get you some breakfast. Master Diluc is expecting you.” She led you into the dining area.

Pulling back an open seat, Adelinde helped you into your seat, pushing your chair closer to the table while the both of you waited for Diluc to arrive. And once he did she did the same for him and walked outside as he dismissed her. Not once did she look back and it made you nervous for reasons you weren’t sure of. The both of you waited in thick silence for the food to arrive, and once it had he took a few bites before he ordered everyone in the house to give you two some privacy.

It was that moment, that moment right then and there that made you question just what exactly your husband would say or do. Maybe an answer to last night’s little event, or something truly dreadful instead. It was the very minute you happened to look at him that he set down his utensils and spoke at last.

“Are you unhappy?” he said casually, as if he hadn’t just questioned the very existence of you in his life. 

You were stunned, but not too much that you couldn’t speak. 

“Of course I am! What kind of question is that?” you replied defensively. 

Your heart began to pound harshly against your chest, and you could feel the sudden drop of your stomach. Clenching the fork in your right hand you tried grounding yourself, controlling your emotions, but the feeling was so strong you started to cry. 

Diluc reached over and gingerly wiped away the stray tear on your cheek. “Please, don’t cry.” You were silent aside from the hurtful whimpers you let out. “I’m not mad.” 

Diluc slowly made his way out of his chair and knelt beside yours in an effort to comfort you, but that did quite the opposite. He gently held onto your left hand and looked at you with softened eyes, except for the fact that they were grey and empty. You tried to stop crying but your tears became uncontrollable, and soon you were sobbing into the crook of your right arm’s elbow. It felt like your world was caving, as if your heart stopped and the air was stripped straight from your lungs. The worst part was how you had no clue what was the real problem, that was until you said that loathsome phrase you always did end up blurting out.

“Are.. Are you leaving me?” you asked timidly.

The fear in your voice was evident but you couldn’t find the strength or courage to pretend otherwise. Sometimes when you blurted it out you hoped he wouldn’t answer, just so that there was no choice for rejection. It was better that way you told yourself, even though he had never rejected you. To be frank, if he hadn’t put that worry in your head in the first place, then you wouldn't have reacted this way. But if there’s one thing you learned from this marriage it was that Diluc would show you only what he wanted you to see. So, to the world he was an honest man, a doting husband, and above all, kind, but that was not the reality you lived. 

Diluc took both of your hands now and gave them a tight grip, looking you deep in your eyes. “I will never leave you. Okay, sweetheart?” 

His words felt less like a promise and more like a threat. You used to have so much more fight in you, but these days you barely had any left. So, you nodded and allowed him to give you a hug before the both of you finished up your breakfast. The remainder of the day was spent watching out the windows of your regal prison, dreaming of the day you could finally feel the sun on your face again. This was the pattern of your every day, from the moment the sun went up and till the very time it fell below the ground; wishing and praying that someday your fate would change. Perhaps that day was closer than you presumed, but you were doubtful. 

The pattern continued for weeks, you had constant flare ups and Diluc would consistently refuse to let you leave the house. Until, one day ,the pain had lessened enough to the point where you didn’t need your cane or wheelchair, and instead could truly stretch your legs for once. It was by no means a permanent thing but you wanted to celebrate this small relief, and with what you might ask? A nice walk through the outside breeze of course. Today was the day you were so sure that Diluc would let you outside, or at the very least walk with you. 

So, you found a comfortable outfit to wear, looked at your aid with a triumphant smile, and carefully descended down the stairs. You were proud to be able to have a day free of your mobility aid, it was liberating, but you knew once you saw Diluc at the bottom of the steps that something was wrong. Something was very wrong, indeed. Slowly you walked down the staircase and once you were face to face with your husband, you could see his face was that of a truly frustrated and fed up man. 

He knows, you thought to yourself. 

“You’re late,” he said in a cold tone as he pulled out a chair at the table for you, and helped you into your seat. 

You kept your sights on your food as much as you could, because you knew damn well that Diluc could sniff out your true feelings with ease. Making sure to hold eye contact with Diluc as much as you could stomach, you took deep breaths as you readied yourself to ask the question you’d been dying to ask. This all depended on how healthy you appeared, if he caught even a whiff of pain or weakness it was all over for you. 

“Sorry,” you said weakly. 

Already your heart was banging hard in your ear drums, causing chaos before the eruption had occurred. You both waited patiently, and you, silently, for the remainder of the food to be served to you. Once you had been served the usual meal you were given, you stared at it for a good moment while Master Diluc began digging in almost immediately. Maybe he was in a better mood today, you thought to yourself. Maybe, or maybe not. He soon noticed you hadn’t touched your food and ushered for you to eat. 

“Eat,” he demanded, a hint of urgency lingering in his voice, but the overall tone was still harsh. 

It was when your teary eyes were long focused on the meal with no urgency to touch it that he raised his brow in suspicion and watched you with an angered expression. It was one thing to try to run away from his hot and cold exterior, but it was another to avoid his good deeds entirely. He set down his utensils with a loud clank and looked straight forward at you, trying his best to contain his rage. 

“I said, eat.” He demanded through grit teeth. 

This was the side of him that many– no, everyone missed completely. Those close to him didn’t see how cruel and unforgiving he was behind closed doors. They didn’t know that if all your food was not eaten how Diluc would sit there to make sure you ate even just a little more than you could stomach, against your begging wishes, of course. No one, and I mean no one except those that resided in the home, knew about his harsh tendencies. And that meant that not a single soul knew just how horribly he treated his sweet angel of a wife, but maybe it was better that way. After all, if someone like you was stupid enough to stay then maybe you really did deserve all the torture he’d constantly put you through. And you’d think that after his hardened voice demanding you to eat that your fear would kick in and force you to shovel down your food, but you’d be wrong. 

“Is there something wrong with the food, my dear?” He asked through grit teeth, again. 

You shook your head and tears fell into your food. 

Diluc stood up from his seat and stared you down. “Then what is wrong?”

You said nothing. Instead, you continued to cry into your food as Diluc stared down at you like a troublesome child. You just couldn’t stop, no matter how hard Diluc told you to calm down, relax, or ease yourself, it was all to no avail. It only furthered your pathetic tears. Diluc wanted to know the truth, just for you to tell him why you refused to eat, but if you told him the truth he’d only become more angry and you weren't sure you could handle that at the moment. You weren’t sure you could handle this life a moment longer, but unfortunately you didn’t and never had a choice. It was tragic really, but that was life for you. 

It wasn’t that you hadn’t tried to leave him before, trust me, you tried, but it was all to no avail. You could hardly make it downstairs without some help, so what made you think you could escape all on your own unscathed. When your family arranged the marriage you blindly accepted, thinking escaping your heartless family must be a better life than if you were to stay, but boy were you wrong. Diluc was sweet at first, kind and gentle just as he is in the public eye, but it wasn’t till the honeymoon that you realized something was terribly wrong. And by time you realized your mistake it was far too late. 

“I-” You started to speak, but were quickly cut off by your choking tears. 

You tried your best to speak up, say something, anything, but each time you were silenced by gut wrenching cries. The one time you attempted to look up to address the situation you were met with cold, unfeeling eyes and averted your gaze with hiccuping sobs. 

“Ugh, will you just spit it out already?” Diluc groaned in frustration. 

That only furthered your sobs and worsened it. Your hands tangled into your hair and began to scratch at your scalp for relief, but you only ended up with a sore scalp and traces of blood underneath your fingernails. Your tears grew bigger, your cries louder, and all sense of rationale left your body. The atmosphere was foggy and unclear, like looking into a cloudy looking glass for reasoning and coming up with absolutely nothing in return. You swore you heard a voice through the thickness of it all, but even as you were dragged from your seat in the dining room and led back into the privacy of your own room, you held no grasp on reality. It must’ve been hours, maybe days, or so it felt like, before you started to come to. A strong grip held you close to something, something warm, and rocked you comfortingly as small shushes could be heard near your ears. 

It was only moments later that you began to recognize the world around you, and the familiar figure holding you close. Too close. It was none other than Master Diluc. Why he was holding you in such a tender and intimate position, you weren’t sure you knew, but you one thing was for sure, it felt extremely uncomfortable. You writhed in his holding, trying your damnedest to squirm out of his hold, but he was much stronger than you. A pins and needles sensation spread from your hips to the tip of your toes, and you could barely move from your position. Your hands were free aside  from the vice grip Diluc had on your arms, almost crushing them as he held you closely. You felt the need to cry all over again, but suppressed it as hard as you could. Thankfully, your attempts worked and this time you remained strong.

You tried to remain quiet and confident, but your confidence was shattered the moment you heard his sweet yet poisonous voice ring through your ears. “You’re awake.”

Unfortunately

“Y-Yes. What happened?” You asked, trying to put the pieces together. 

Diluc shifted into an upright position and prepared to tell you some of the truth. He couldn’t have you trying to run off, again. Unfortunately, what Master DIluc didn’t know was that your determination far outweighed any punishment he could potentially give to you. After he explained it to you in his own version, you nodded in agreement and expressed your exhaustion. You wanted to go to bed and forget all about this day., even though it felt like it had just begun. Sure, Diluc had his suspicions as to why you so suddenly wanted to sleep after such a conversation, but he brushed it off as his own paranoia. After all, he’d curated a life that he made damn sure you could never run away from. At least, not without some help. 

That night was spent with eyes vigilantly open, wide and observant as you rested your head on the pillow, keeping out for when Diluc would come to bed. If he caught you in bed awake right now he was sure to have a few words, but you’d simply lie and say the pain kept you awake, which wouldn’t exactly be far from the truth, but it wasn’t the truth. You watched out the only window you had in your room, gazing at the open sky full of stars and the full moon and wondered what was taking Diluc so long. What was taking him so long? He should’ve long been in bed by now. So, why was he still hard at work in his study? Regardless of the reasoning you calmed yourself down, trying your best to satiate your impatience, because if you weren’t careful it could very well be the thing that led to your downfall. 

It must’ve been about an hour or so later when you heard the heavy footsteps of your husband head up the stairs and then quietly trail into your shared room. You could vividly hear him discard his clothes and climb into what you guessed were more comfortable ones. He kissed you softly on the forehead, foolishly believing you were asleep, and climbed into bed with you. Feeling his hot breath against your neck sent shivers down your spine, you couldn’t remember the last time you slept without him breathing down your neck, literally. It was awful. Although you were thankful that tonight his vice grip wasn’t holding you in place —making it perfect for your little escape plan— there was still a heavy feeling of discomfort floating throughout the bedroom. 

You were patient, and all that patience of yours finally paid off when you heard the light to heavy snores of Diluc behind you. It was time, time to make your escape. It would be tricky getting out of the bed with him in it, but thankfully Diluc was a heavy sleeper. Slowly and very very carefully you removed the blankets from your body and started to slide down to the edge of the bed. Closer.. Closer.. Closer.. Until finally, your legs hung off the edge of the bed. Diluc shifted in his sleep and let out a loud snore which caused you to jump in your own skin, but looking back you saw he was still fast asleep. Letting out a silent sigh of relief you steadied yourself with both hands as you placed both of your wobbly feet to the ground. Now, the next part would prove one of the most difficult tasks, getting your cane. It currently sat in a cage with other canes and umbrellas you owned (not that you ever actually left the house) and could potentially make a lot of noise if you weren’t careful. 

Cautiously you tiptoed to the cage and took a slow, deep breath before reaching inside and slowly pulled it out. It was a wooden cane so if hit at just the right amount of speed it could make quite enough noise, not as much as it would if it were metal, but it would be just enough to awaken the young master. With extreme caution you began to pull it out, further and further, until it was almost fully out, but in an unfortunate turn of events your hand began to grow weak and numb and you dropped it. Thankfully, you were able to grab it with your other hand before it could wake up Diluc, but not before it banged against the cage in a painfully loud manner. You froze in place, not moving a single muscle until you heard the light snores of Diluc once again. Carefully pulling out the entire cane you then positioned it as you usually would for the day and used it to help you hold your weight upright, as you gradually turned the doorknob and opened the bedroom door. 

Peeking out the door you could so no one and nothing except for the moonlight illuminating the hallway. Now was as good a chance as any to make a run for it, and so you quickly tiptoed down the stairs with the help of your cane to steady you, eagerly walking towards the door the moment your feet touched the first floor. Your hand hovered above the knob as you stopped in shock. Was this it? Were you finally going to leave this miserable and pitiful life to live one full of joy and freedom? It is what you deserved after all, you thought. It’s what you had always wanted and needed. Without wasting a moment sooner you turned the knob and braced yourself for whatever waited for you outside those doors, and stepped outside for the first time in a long time. 

It must’ve been summertime because the heat was thick and the air was muggy. If you had been out on a daily or constant basis you were sure you would’ve hated it, but in that moment you loved nothing more than to feel the heat and thick, muggy air. You never realized how beautiful the Dawn Winery was from the outside until just now. Crystalflies flew through the air and around the grape vines. The moon was full and the stars shone brightly in the nighttime sky. It was beautiful, everything you’d always dreamt of and more. The flowers were even more beautiful than you had remembered and they smelt even better than you could’ve ever dreamt of. Everything was perfect, absolutely perfect. That is until you saw the mansion lit up with lights and realized that he and possibly everyone else was awake. 

You tried to make a run for it as best as you could but you were stopped by a hand on your wrist pulling you backwards and down onto the ground. You fell into a puddle of mudd, soaking your nightgown as you looked up in horror at the man that was supposed to be your husband. His face was cold and full of fury, you’d never seen him look like this before. This wasn’t like those other times when you tried to take walks, because this time you had actually tried to leave him. Leave him all alone with only his wounded pride and broken heart for comfort. He was seething with rage and all you could do in reply was cry, cry like a child that had been caught with their hands in a cookie jar. You didn’t know what exactly prompted you to cry so much, so hard, and so pathetically, but you continued to do so anyway. 

“Come inside, now.” Diluc demanded.

But now that you had a taste of the outside world after such a long time of being deprived of it you wanted more, so you shook your head and rejected his commands. This only further angered Diluc, because he then pulled you up by your forearms and dragged you back inside. You clawed at the door frame trying to stay outside, but he was much stronger than you. He threw you onto the floor and slammed the door shut, proceeding to lock it tightly with a key you’d never seen before. Immediately Diluc started cursing at you, a bright fire in his eyes that consumed his very being began to spread as you realized you had royally fucked up. You couldn’t even focus on a word he was saying because all you could imagine was whatever hell he was about to put you through.

One Week Later…

“Come on, let’s get you all nice and pretty.” Adelinde said, tightening your brand new dress that Diluc had bought you.

It was an apology, a present, but you knew the true nature of the young master, and nothing could fix this marriage, not even your own freedom. You stood there and looked in the mirror as Adelinde fixed your hair with a smile. You too would’ve smiled if it weren’t for the grim reality you faced. Especially on days where Diluc invited over his brother for dinner. Kaeya had no clue of anything that went on in the mansion, not a damn idea, but that didn’t mean he had no suspicions. Kaeya was smart like that, could catch onto things quickly especially being the cavalry captain, and this sort of thing was no different. 

After Adelinde had gotten you all nice and ready the two of you descended down the staircase where you ran into Diluc and his brother, Kaeya. Kaeya looked towards you and smiled, helping you down the rest of the way. Kaeya always was a helpful and kind man like that, constantly helping those in need. Sometimes, just sometimes, you wished he’d help you escape this place, but that was a childish dream. The two of you exchanged pleasantries as you all sat at the dining room table and awaited your food. Everything was going well until the events of a week ago started to come flooding in. You tried your best to hide it but with how brightly the sun started to shine through the windows you couldn’t help but miss the heat and the thick air you once touched. 

“Are you alright?” Kaeya asked, but you playfully brushed off your odd behavior with laughter and a joke, but he was not convinced.

No, Kaeya was not so easily swayed by the same type of joking behavior he too would use to cover his own emotions. So, he watched you the entire dinner all the way till the end. He noticed how flinched against his brother’s touch and noticed how your gaze always seemed to find itself lined up with the open windows. Something was wrong, something was not right about this and he was determined to get to the bottom of it. He would not let you suffer a moment longer, no matter how impossible the mission seemed. Kaeya wanted to tell you this, he wanted to reassure you that he was going to help you escape, but he could never find the right time with Diluc and Adelinde breathing down his neck as he was sure they did the same, and much worse to  you. 

It soon came time to say his goodbyes and as he did he locked eyes with you, saying things with them that he would never dare to say out loud in front of the young master. Even though it was just a dinner, and a revealing one at that, he planned to have many more dinners with Diluc in the future, warm up to you, get closer to you, and hopefully gain your trust enough to help you escape this awful, awful place. That is if he didn’t get killed in the process of it all… 

[lampochkaart]

do you have any songs you associate w dangan characters? ^-^

Hi! Thank you for the ask!

Sorry for taking so incredibly long to answer, I tried (but failed) to give each DRV3 character a song because I like all of them but for some it was too hard to find something among the songs I listened to. Also I was busy with some irl stuff.

In any case, sorry for the wait!

I don't think that much about DR1, DR2 and UDG characters, so I'll focus on DRV3 instead. There will be major spoilers so be warned❗

But before going to DRV3 I will just say that Cotards' Solution by Will Wood & the Tapeworms is absolutely a Nagito song for me.

Rolling my third eye into the back

Of my head and squinting through the black

Saw no center, saw not where it lead

It’s times like this that make me wish that

I wished that I were dead, I don’t wish I were dead

But somebody’s got to go

I wanna make my murder look like a suicide

But they’ll all know, they’ll all know, but they’ll all know the body’s mine

I wanna go anonymous to identify

But they’ll all know, they’ll all know, they’ll all know, they’ll all know

They’ll all know that the body’s mine

It just feels so Ch.5 Nagito. Things he learned and then his plan. And just general vibe of the song... Really good

Now, as to DRV3...

I failed giving every DRV3 character a song but I did give most of them something.

I didn't plan to put so many songs in russian here but it kinda happened, oops... It's probably because I wanted to share some songs that are not very popular but as I think fit characters really well. And I don't think about some of the characters that much compared to the other ones, so that probably played a role too. I translated them to the best of my ability, so hopefully it's fine

I'm just always kinda nervous, haha😅

Also put the text of songs as pictures bc tumblr was lagging because the post turned out so long, hope it's okay

Anyway, to the songs!

● Kaede Akamatsu

"Cair de Lune" by Debussy. No explaination needed.

● Shuichi Saihara

When I heard "Sweet Hibiscus Tea" by Penelope Scott I instantly thought about post Ch.1 Shuichi. I think it fits him really well.

● Maki Harukawa

I associate "Bird Song" by Florence + the Machine with Maki. Specifically with Maki and Kokichi.

This song just makes me think of Maki's dislike for Kokichi because of how he exposed her talent to everyone, effectively making everyone suspicious and ostracizing her. How her anger was slowly building up until her patience ran out. And in Ch. 5 she tried to kill him, but it didn't make her feel any better. She went back to what she was trying to get away from. She went back to being the Ultimate Asassin. Her actions haunt her.

● Kaito Momota

For both Kaito and Kokichi I have their own whole playlists. But here I'm only giving one song per character, so...

The obvious choice would be "Constellations" by The Oh Hellos because of that one beautiful Kaito PMV. But it's pretty well known and I wanna share a very niche song, which is "Герой Второго Плана" (Supporting Hero/Secondary Character) by Чароит (Хельга эн-Кенти). I will share my translation here, the original text you can see there

This whole song just screams "Kaito" to me. I'm not sure any song can fit him more perfectly than this one. The main theme of this song is Kaito's desire to be seen as the hero, as the protagonist, as the main character. But no matter how hard he tries, Kaito feels like a secondary character.

And also the last fragment makes me think about the end of the 5th trial.

● Kokichi Ouma

As previously mentioned I have a whole playlist for Kokichi specifically. But here I'm gonna share only one song. And it's "Темная Лошадка" (Dark Horse) also by Чароит. Just like in previous case I'll write my translation here and the original text you can see there

There are quite a lot of wordplay here so it was a little difficult to translate some parts. For example, I'm not sure that translating lines "You did what you wanted and became an stranger among your own"/"Ask yourself, when did you become your own among strangers?" that way is absolutely correct even though a translator and the internet told me it is. I think that "enemy to your friends"/"friend to your enemies" captures the meaning better. Or at least "enemy among your own"/"your own among enemies" but most resourses I checked were suggesting "stranger..." translation so I ended up using it here.

And just generally this song has a lot of words that sound similar but have different meaning and also a lot of expressions, so it was kinda hard to capture everything. I mostly just translated things literally.

Anyway, this song fits Kokichi really well. I can't even choose just one part, so many lines fit him really well. I think this song pretty much describes Kokichi's arc in the Killing Game.

● Kirumi Tojo

I think "Surface Pressure" from Encanto fits Kirumi. The whole song fits her really well, because while, yes, she does want to serve people and feels responsible for completing requests, but I think there's a small part of her, part that she buried really-really deep, that wants to be able to do things just for herself, part that wants the pressure off. She's not just a selfless servant, she's also a teenage girl, who has wants and needs of her own, even if she tries to supress them.

● Tsumugi Shirogane

The first song that comes to mind when I think about mastermind Tsumugi is "The Fine Print" by The Stupendium, specifically because of this part:

Yay, corrupted corporations that doesn't care about human rights, autonomy and freedom! This is so very Team DR represented by Tsumugi

● Korekiyo Shinguji

TW: Korekiyo's sister

I have two songs that I associate with Kiyo, and they're kinda different in their meaning and energy. But to me the one that's associates with him more is "Экзорцизм" (Exorcism) by Flëur. Original text is there

Translation:

This song makes me think about how deeply ingrained Korekiyo's sister in him. How she's basically became a part of him. He never thought about making his own friends, he always thought about bringing friends to her. She's partly the reason he became anthropologist. She's literally always with him, posessing him like a spirit, like a demon. At this point removing her would be incredible painful because she's like plant who's roots go so very deep.

That's what I think about listenong to this song. Plus just the vibes of the music kinda make me think of some kind of seance/ritual.

The other song is "Спасибо" also by Fleur. When I listen to it, I think about post game Korekiyo on his slow way to healing

Full original text here

Translation:

I couldn't decide what song to put here, so I just put both of them here

● Himiko Yumeno

I struggled think of a song for Himiko, but then I remembered "Розовый слон" by Fleur. It reminds me of Himiko's relationship with Tenko. How Tenko was always following her and trying to get closer with her, but Himiko was tired of her. And then when Tenko died Himiko was horrified and regretted never valuing her while she was still alive.

Full original text here

● Miu Iruma

"What the world needs" from Ride the Cyclone the musical

I think this song kinda fits Miu. She can be rather judgy and disrespectful to others and she thinks of herself as "gorgeous girl genius" and that's even partially the reason why she tried to kill and get away with murder in Ch.4. Of course there's more to her than that, but I still think this song kinda fits her

● K1-B0

"Euthanasia" by Will Wood because of this beautiful animatic.

I feel like given enought time I could technically find songs for all of them (and for some maybe find something different), but I've had this ask in my box for so long I decided to just post what I have already. It is what it is ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Anyway, thank you for the ask!

[thermodynamic-comedian]

i wanna know if this is common knowledge among will wood fans- some songs definently come in pairs, right?

self- and -ish are obvious, but then there's also tomcat disposables and willard!, which i kind of consider the same story. both songs seem to be from the perspective of someone who feels outcast or different from everyone around them, to a degree where they relate to (or see themselves as) more animal than human. although, tomcat disposables seems to be about trying your best to fit in, but failing to, whereas willard! is more about giving up on trying to fit in, embracing what makes you different, maybe even thinking what makes you different makes you better. the end of willard! also references tomcat disposables directly through instruments, having the tomcat disposables melody at the very end.

then there's also hand me my shovel, i'm going in! and the song with five names, which are the same idea presented from two different points of view. both songs also use digging as a metaphor for introspection, hand me my shovel being explicitly pro-introspection, whereas 5 names seems to be against it. the choruses of both songs have such similar lyrics, yet seem to disagree: "this is not enough, this is not enough to prove it yet! no, i need to hit the bottom." "you could break a shovel when you break new ground; you dig dirt up when you dig deep down. you should know better than that by now, it's not profound to know that you could never know." these are two sides of essencially the same argument: should you try to find out who you are, or not?

dr. sunshine is dead and cotard's solution also seem connected, both by their theme and by the cotard's solution piano melody (and the accompanying lyrics) also being at the end of dr. sunshine. both songs have something to do with death, more specifically someone believing they're dead (this is cotard's delusion, which the first song gets its name from). cotard's solution is very clearly from the perspective of someone who believes that they are dead. it's also heavily implied this person is suicidal, with lyrics like "i wish that i were dead" and "i wanna make my murder look like a suicide", and the backing vocals singing "kill me" towards the end. i think this is related to the person's delusion; the suicidality almost presents itself as body dysphoria in their case, because they truly believe they are dead, so being inside a body that is still very much alive feels wrong (presented through lyrics like "you do the math, who's looking back? that's not me!" and "check in the mirror to see how i look; i look different in different ways.") the protagonist of dr. sunshine is dead seems to have very similar thoughts: "for your self-portraits, sign another name. who should i be then, if i'll never be the same?". dr. sunshine seems to be more about re-inventing yourself, thinking that the person you used to be is dead, and now you must resume a new identity. i'm not sure if this sort of thinking it directly related to cotard's delusion (i'm by no means an expert, i'm just some guy on the internet who really likes analyzing songs), but it does seem directly related to cotard's solution.

songs that might not be directly connected but i still think are worth mentioning include chemical overreaction and skeleton appreciation day. the last verse of chemical overreaction follows the same chord progression as skeleton appreciation day; you can hear the same melody in the background, played by an electric guitar. the themes of the two songs seem seperate, though.

[kinning-oliver]

Cotard's Solution by Will Wood & The Tapeworms reminds me of Sam Winchester and his deteriorating mental health.

The entire song makes me think of Sam Winchester, but I'll copy and paste down some parts of the song, so you can try to see my vision!

"And if dreams can come true What does that say about nightmares? I'll stay awake tonight"

This makes me think about when Sam had those continuous nightmares regarding Jess. It also makes me think about when Sam had visions.

"Cry my name, remind my brain of my identity I'm not gonna listen, I'm not my volition, I'm Shanananananana, free will! Am I to blame for riding this train, right by my destiny? Ah, prove I can crack, ah, loose from the track, ah Shanananananana, free will!"

In the show, we witness how Sam tries to go against God's will in regards to stopping each apocalypse, however, Sam lives under the illusion that he is the one making decisions (aka having free will) but he is the one being manipulated into what decisions to make. As per usual with demons like Ruby, Lilith, and of course - Lucifer himself. Amongst other manipulators like Zachariah, Gabriel, Raphael, and Michael. So on and so on.

"Divide by one and find I'm one less than the one I was So, how many people am I? Now that I keep 'em in my Shananananana, memory, still I Check in the mirror to see how I look I look different in different ways Ah, you do the math, ah, who's looking back, ah Shanananananana, that's not me!"

We also witness how Sam has no control over his body autonomy. His body. mind, and soul is continuously used by others without his consent. He's been possessed numerous of times. Such as being possessed by Meg, Lucifer, and Gadreel. I'm positive there are more but these are the ones that popped up into my head.

"Carving my initials in the back Of my hand in case of losing track I forgot, remember to forget It's times like this that make me wish that I wished that I could live, I don't wish I could live, but Somebody's got to stay"

This part reminds me of when Sam was hallucinating Lucifer. But, it also just reminds me of Sam and the many times that his trust was taken advantage of. The many times that Sam self-sacrificed and self-destructed. The many times that Sam was unaware of the difference between reality and fiction (that could also change at any moment because his life is not his own).

"I wanna make my murder look like a suicide (kill me) But they'll all know (kill me), they'll all know (kill me) They'll all know that the body's mine (kill me) I wanna go anonymous to identify (kill me) But they'll all know (kill me), they'll all know (kill me) They'll all know (kill me), they'll all know (kill me) They'll all know that the body's mine"

I feel like this one doesn't really need an explanation. It just embodies Sam Winchester and his struggle with identity. You seeing my vision?

[nightwing-scp]

Night as SELF-iSH lyrics pt. 2:

Cotard's Solution (Anatta, Dukkha, Anicca) (without the intro)

Cry my name, remind my brain of my identity

Night- shortened form of Nightwing, her nickname given to her during her time in Nexus. anyways. her "identity" is a complex thing to her

I’m not gonna listen, I’m not my volition, I’m Sha na na na na na na na, free will

she's always had that rebellious side, and now that she has to deal with the fact that some people see her as "less than" what she was before, some even suggesting she wasn't actually sentient or whatever anymore- so she's like "no I still have the same amount of free will as before what is wrong with you"

Am I to blame for riding this train right by my destiny? Ah, prove I can crack, ah, loose from the track, ah Sha na na na na na na na, free will

She'll sometimes do things that she wouldn't normally have done- that may or may not have consequences- to prove she has free will in a sense and isn't just being controlled by Foundation algorithms.

Rolling my third eye into the back Of my head and squinting through the black Saw no center, saw not where it lead

basically just. "introspection? no thank you"

It’s times like this that make me wish that I wished that I were dead, I don’t wish I were dead But somebody’s got to go

this is basically leading up to the theme of the song in the next lyrics

I wanna make my murder look like a suicide But they’ll all know, they’ll all know, but they’ll all know the body’s mine

this lyric is based on a person with Cotard's syndrome thinking they've already been murdered, so they want to make it "look like a suicide" by killing themself. but I looked it up and: "Cotard's syndrome comprises any one of a series of delusions that range from a belief that one has lost organs, blood, or body parts to insisting that one has lost one's soul or is dead. " the bold parts are what actually does apply to Night, so- (the soul part is debatable okay)

I wanna go anonymous to identify But they’ll all know, they’ll all know, they’ll all know, they’ll all know They’ll all know that the body’s mine

she's too well-known in the Foundation for her to ever go anonymous. plus she's pretty sure they track her somehow.

Divide by 1 and find I’m one less than the one I was So how many people am I? Now that I keep ‘em in my Sha na na na na na, memory, still I

Dividing by one (the 3125 incident maybe-) should get you the same number, but in Night's case, Entity's missing, so she's one less than the one she was before. She's basically permanently saved some memories of it- whether she wanted to or not

Check in the mirror to see how I look, I look different in different ways Ah, you do the math, ah, who’s looking back? Ah Sha na na na na na na na, that's not me

different in different ways- "half human and half machine" basically oh my god is that a cabinet man referenc-

okay this is will wood not lemon demon. back on topic people

yeah sometimes she misses the parts of her body that were replaced with their mechanical counterparts (especially) so she doesn't feel like herself, or at least what she's supposed to be

Carving my initials in the back Of my hand in case of losing track

she has her original SCP designation tattoed on the upper right side of her back so there's that

I forgot, remember to forgive? It’s times like this that make me wish that I wished that I could live, I don’t wish I could live But somebody’s got to stay

forgetting, remembering, they're all dangerous things in different contexts of the Foundation. and "somebody's got to stay" is one of the things that gives her a reason to keep living. you can interpret that however because it applies to a lot

[soymemes]

SELF-ISH

lyrical starters from "self-ish" by will wood and the tapeworms (1/2)

---self-

"I'll shake the apples from my family tree."

"I heard the world would turn to Hell."

"Compared to that, I'm doing well."

"I won't come back and be the same."

"And I'm gonna be myself again."

---2012

"Fuck!"

"I was an existential criminal"

"I don't remember how I forgot myself."

"I'll escape this reality."

"It's sure to be a story I can tell in purgatory."

"Did you lose yourself?"

---cotard's solution

"And if dreams can come true, what does that say about nightmares?"

"I'll stay awake tonight."

"I wished that I were dead."

"I don't wish I were dead."

"I wanna make my murder look like a suicide."

"They'll all know."

"I look different in different ways."

"I wished that I could live."

"I don't wish I could live."

"Somebody's got to stay."

---mr. capgras

"You're trying to replace yourself."

"What's wrong with me?"

"You'll never take me alive."

"You better pray that I die."

"Didn't choose what you were born in."

---the song with five names

"Why can't I see that I am the 'me' that I was born into?"

"And yet you believe it's true."

"Trust in yourself or anyone else."

"I've been wrong before."

"You should know better by now."

"And everything and everyone will die soon."

"It's good enough for me."

------

[fr33ksncr33ps]

a collection of my favourite song lyrics (to be continued)

'’ Counting your face among the living ‘‘ but specifically paired with the later verse ‘‘ But does anyone notice? / There’s a corpse in this bed ’‘ - Early Sunsets Over Monroeville by My Chemical Romance

‘‘ Our secrets sleep in winter clothes ‘‘ - In The Aeroplane Over The Sea by Neutral Milk Hotel

‘‘  For four fortnights I have fled from my fortress / Foraging forests five footsteps in length / Fortitude found within forty ounce bottles / Flowing like flies from your face / From your face ‘‘ - A Song Dedicated To The Memory of Stormy The Rabbit

‘‘ I’d blame it on the person that nobody knows I am ‘‘ - A Mask of My Own Face by Lemon Demon

‘‘  I wanna make my murder look like a suicide / But they’ll all know the body’s mine / I wanna go anonymous to identify / But they’ll all know the body’s mine ‘‘ - Cotard’s Solution (Annata, Dukkha, Anicca) by Will Wood and The Tapeworms (fun fact: I used to think the lyrics were ‘‘I wanna take eleven months to identify’‘)

‘‘ You are coming down with me / Hand in unloveable hand ‘‘ - No Children by The Mountain Goats