#“enjoy your suffering and look at this man's face to lessen them” and then dip

[wusopiejung25]

(respectfully searching for his dimples)

WHAT DO YOU MEAN MC CALLS HIM DIMPLES WHEN HE HAS NONE????? WHERE IS HIS DIMPLES LOCATED???? IN HIS BUTTCHEE—

[stuckybarton]

One Punch One Kiss

Summary: You find a different option to relieve your stress and the fact that you might just be in love with Bruce Banner. Warning: Profanities. Mild Violence. Slight Angst, Self-Depreciation.  Grammar Errors. Not Beta’d. Characters: Unnamed Female Character x Bruce Banner Words: 3,092 A/N: So this happened. Lol. Masterlist

It been well over months now since you've found yourself in care of the so-called Earth's Mightiest Heroes, The Avengers. It was far from the life you once lived.

The poverty of the slums, where fighting was always the way to survive another day. It was always survival of the fittest for someone like you. One of the many reasons why it took so long for you to intergrade with the team. Your "power" wasn't that much special compared to the rest of the bunch.

You were a mixed martial artist, finally getting out of the bottom of the barrel but a freak accident left your hands, your tool for survival, barely able close into a fist anymore--you can barely even open them back then too. You find yourself mixed with the wrong crowd and after one too many experiments, you've gain this so-called mutation that lets you punch anything effortlessly. But it doesn't come without a price.

When the adrenaline dies down, you are left with an indestructible fist, but the pain was never far behind. Hands that would last the rest of time, but the pain, the burning torturous pain was something you can never get used to. It was better to dip your hands in lava than the excruciating pain. The insistent throbbing on each finger made it hard for you to open your hands, as much as you were capable of opening them. There there are nights were you want nothing more than to end things, end your suffering once and for all.

But out comes one Bruce Banner.

A man that has known about the demons pestering your life. Having to fight his own every single day as he tries to control the big green monster he calls his other self.

He had helped you so much. From physically helping you maintain the pain you had to endure post-mission, helping Tony Stark with designing the perfect gloves that could potentially lessen the pain you had to experience after each mission. Then there was psychological and mental help.

You were never one for meditating. Always using your fist to forget about your problems as much as possible. But without that stress relief, you were left to Bruce's method.

One hour every single day. Whether it was Bruce having a big research or in the middle of a debriefing. They would take time out of their own schedules just for the one hour to bring semblance to their frail state of minds.

Somehow it does work.

In either your room or in Bruce's room. An hour long meditation with nothing but the sound of white noise brings a momentary peace in your mind, while also making you realize something you try so hard to ignore.

You were in love with Bruce.

Madly, deeply, and crazily enough to be in love with the first man to have every taken care of you. You're fucked, that much you have known for yourself since the realization had occurred.

Now you're left with making sure to make as many excuses as you possibly could to avoid Bruce and your daily meditation. Everyone in the compound knew what you were trying to do, but knowing you and knowing how the aloof Bruce Banner could be, they try to mediate the situation without getting themselves too involved.

"What's up, One-Punch Woman." Tony's usual nicknames annoyed you when you first started out, but as time goes by, you just find yourself getting used to it. You got to talk to Peter about letting Tony watch anime. He gets more material from those.

"Today's not the day to piss me off Tony." You muttered.

You had enjoyed the momentary peace inside the training room. With only the resounding echoes of your first against the punching bag, the rapid breathing escaping your lips, and the low hum of the air conditioner. This was your compromise for not joining Bruce with meditating.

"Come on, Rocky." Tony's hand resting on your shoulder angered you. You hated anyone, aside from Bruce, from touching you.

"Get your hands off, Stark."

Your fist continued to collide with the punching bag, but every single time Tony would try to intervene. Either trying to pull you away from the punching bag or pulling the punching bag away from you.

It took all the control out of you to stop yourself from using Tony as your punching bag instead. Every deep breath you took, the resolve was slowly fading away and your hands were now screaming at you to stop pain finally coming in full waves.

"Stark, I am warning you."

"I'd stop if you tell me why you're avoiding Dr. Banner. It's affecting his productivity if I'm being honest."

And that was the straw the finally broke the camel's back. Punching Stark right in the jaw, but his nano-tech was quick to protect him from punch, but the impact left him stuck right through the walls and everything was now on high alert as F.R.I.D.A.Y placed the training room on lockdown.

"I told you to stay the hell away from me, Stark." You spat, now thinking of a way to get the hell out of the training room without anyone, especially the particular man, coming to see that you were falling apart all because of your god damn feelings. "F.R.I.D.A.Y. open the doors." You demand but the AI refused only wanting Tony to give the command.

"The hell is wrong with you Y/N?"

Now coming face to face with an Iron Man suit of Tony, the last thing you would want was to ruin the reputation you have made with the team. The unproblematic one. The one that would rather keep to yourself than argue with anyone on the team.

"You! Get the hell away me." Your voice grew hoarse as the genuine anger begins to manifest.

One punch, that was all it would take to shut the hell out of the man and you could escape the confinements of the training room.

"Open the doors, Tony. I'm not really in the mood to deal with you and the rest of your fucked up group."

"Well, you're part of this group whether you like it or not. So doesn't that make you just as fucked up as we are?" Tony was actually pointing his beam at you and it made it more evident that you didn't belong here in this group as much as Bruce had assured you were.

There would always be this power dynamic that you will never escape from. May it be the slums, the laboratory, or this compound. You will be nothing more than a tool for them to use and to exploit.

"Stand down, Y/N. You're being hysterical."

That was when you finally snapped, running towards him, clenched fist swung but it never met his face, instead a green being came quick to block your hit.

"It's okay, Y/N." Hulk assured--or was it Bruce. You weren't certain anymore.

Eyes trained towards where you fist has landed. Landing right onto his ribs, had he been in his normal body, you were sure you've fracture a few ribs or worse, punctured his lungs or heart in the process.

When your eyes trailed upward, the gentle look on the Hulk's face scared you. Even he was worried about and everything you had been doing for the past few days as you avoided Bruce.

You didn't flinch when his larger hand tried cupping your cheeks, instead nestling more into his touch. You had it bad. But it was enough to calm you down for the moment. Bruce was your peace.

"Breath, Y/N."

Slowly, you see him turn back to his normal self. Never once did his hand leave your own. Both hands now cupping your cheeks as he stared at you.

"Can you do that for me?"

You nodded, never breaking eye contact. You breath, you tried you best to calm the heart you never noticed was beating to fast as you slowed your breathing.

"You got me..."

Indeed you do. He was here, even after the days you've tried ignoring him, avoiding him, and downright pushing him away. You still got him.

"That's all that matters..."

You nod, eyes now stinging with the unshed tears. You were afraid of losing him. You feeling for him that presented itself to you now, you didn't want to lose it. You couldn't depend on anyone else in this compound but him. Your only sanctuary in your state of mind. Your Survival of the Fittest mentality scrambling at this man that would give you the world even if you so much as ask it from him.

The Strongest Avenger, but was the most vulnerable in your presence.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. open the door." Bruce requested as he pulled you to his chest.

With the AI following, you caught glimpse of the mess the Hulk had made through the wall just to get it. Wincing at what Tony would have them to just to pay for the damage of it.

Their journey has been silent. The only sound you could hear, or at least tried to focus on was his heart. The rhythmic calm beats against your ear made you focus on your own breathing until you arrived in his room.

Bare as Bruce's room was, it brought you a calmness of the familiarity it had with you. Not much decorations aside from the diplomas and achievements, one picture still stuck out the most to you in his array of achievements. It was a picture of you and Bruce. It was post-mission in the Quintjet, one bud on each of your ear and you still remembered the two of you were listening to Lofi music at the time. What made the picture so memorable was the sight of the two of you grinning ear to ear while icing your aching hand after going head to head with a colossus from who-knows what planet.

You still remember why the two of your were smiling. There was a bet between Tony and Rhodey that you wouldn't be able to take on the giant and had waged a hundred dollars each because they were just that confident. Yet a minute later, you've just punched the alien once before it run as far away from you as possible. Being owed two hundred dollar and just the bragging right you were having had a smile on your face and Bruce was quick to join along in the merriment of the moment.

"What's wrong, Y/N?"

Returning back to the present, the worry in Bruce's face was still evident but you pulled away, cheeks warm at the realization that the man had been shirtless this entire time and you were leaning on his chest all throughout.

"Nothing." You muttered, now unable to meet his eyes now.

"The hole you've punched Tony into isn't much of a nothing." His words, as agitated as you knew he was being at the moment, was calm.

"Tony is just being annoying." You tried to reason. "He was getting on my nerves and deserves it." You added knowing very well that if it wasn't for Bruce, Tony would more than likely be enduring a concussion or even brain damage at this point.

Just the thought of that happening brought a knot right into your throat making you incapable of swallowing. Had it not been for Bruce, you were sure you would need to pack your backs yet again and leave the compound. God know what the rest of the team would think of you if that happened, or what what they would do to you as retaliation.

"But it's not just because of that." It was as if Bruce can read your thoughts. All he wants now is just confirmation.

"It has nothing to do with you." Lie.

"Then what is it? You've been acting weird for the last few days. You're blowing me off and using every excuse in the book to get away from our meditation and away from me. So this definitely has something to do with me."

You didn't have an answer to him. Fear overcame telling him the truth, making him understand your worries.

"Just say it. Say that the other guy is scaring you and be done with it."

You blinked confused with what he was saying.

"That's not it." You assured, finding the right words was hard.

"THEN WHAT?" As the green tint quickly appeared on his skin just as quick as it disappeared, your adrenaline was still high from the incident in the training room, fist already already ready to defend yourself if he loses control.

Never once did you raise you hand at Bruce. Never once did you face with in your attack stance. But never once did Bruce raise his voice at you. This was affecting him just as much as it did you.

"I'm a monster, Y/N. I know that more than anyone else. All you had to do was say so and be done with it."

"You're not a monster, Bruce. You never were in my eyes."

"Yeah, avoiding me makes it so convincing." he snorts turning his back at you, a shirt already in his grasp. "Just say it, Y/N. I can take it. I'm not a child anymore that can't handle the truth."

Biting your lips, this was worse than you have actually anticipated. You watched Bruce ramble on and on about why he was a monster and why you have every right to avoid him. But that wasn't what truly had you speechless. It was this, this man that was aloof as he was had done nothing but bare his heart of to you. Show he was just pained as you were with this situation you've placed yourself in--placed the two of you in.

Was it still the adrenaline or your stupidity, you really didn't know as you surged towards him, lips mashing against his own. His lips was soft against your own. The taste of coffee and hint of mint. And just like that, the words in Bruce's mouth stopped and he was left just as stunned as your were for what you've done.

"I, I don't--I...I don't hate you, Bruce." you stutter, eyes refusing to meet his own yet again. "It's opposite really."

"Say it, Y/N."

"I love you, Banner." You muttered finally looking at him. "I love you and I know for a fact that you wouldn't want to be seen anywhere near me."

"What?"

"You're you. Smart, Got a good sense of humour. You care about me more than my parents ever did. You're the first person here in the compound that treated me more like a human instead of this asset or experiment."

It was now your turn to ramble on about why you don't deserve him. You knew very well why and whatever reason that would try to oppose those beliefs were quick to be stomped away. That was how your mind works, you don't deserve things, you work hard for anything and everything.

"Y/N close your eyes."

You blinked at  the sudden request, but the smile that now rested on Bruce's face assured you slightly. But knowing him, knowing he would be the last person to hurt you, your eyes finally closed.

In the darkness, you tried to calm you mind. As much as your trusted Bruce, the unknown scared you, the reason behind this situation worried you. to be this vulnerable in front of him, to be this defenceless.

The last thing you would have expected to happen was his lips against you own. Breathless, you open your eyes to see Bruce's own closed as the kiss continued. The gentle hands that had calmed you down in the training room were once again there to calm you don't. Gently you find yourself pulling more into the kiss, aching hands rested on his chest. The calm heart now coming alive against your fingertips.

Pulling away, Bruce opened his eyes, breathless just as you were and the uncertainty of just what happened finally becoming more an more evident. It was just how you would accept it at this point.

"Hope that's clear enough for you." Bruce muttered, now his own eyes refusing to meet your own. "Why you think so low of yourself? You're part of this team because you value civilian's safety more than our safety, more than your own safety that it's sometimes so annoying because I worry about you and your lack of safety."

You blinked, how the hell did this happen. One minute you were both self-deprecating yourselves, then the next minute it was lips and cheesy lines of admiration for one another.

"I'm not perfect. Far from it, but just seeing you avoid me. It makes it so hard for me to ignore my own thoughts. Maybe they were right." Bruce shrugged.

You shook your head, as much as you knew he wouldn't see. He really didn't know his worth, the irony that you yourself couldn't do the same. The smile just couldn't help but finally escape your lips before you head find solitude in his chest. The sound of his beating heart could do nothing but give you a calmness you didn't think you would need in your life.

"Can we start over." You whispered, the dysfunction that was the two of you wasn't ideal and you knew whatever this might end up becoming, it wouldn't be easy. Nothing was ever easy when it comes to the life they were living. But you knew you could make it work.

"What?"

Pulling away from him. You gentle punched his cheek seeing his lack of effort to block it. He knew just as much as you did that you will never hurt him intentionally.

"My name is Y/N Y/L/N and I love you, Dr. Bruce Robert Banner."

Shaking the man's shaking hand, you smiled as his hands held onto your own tighter and accepting the shake of hand.

"Nice meeting you, Y/N." he started, voice shaky. "My name is Bruce Banner, and I love you too."

With the smile only growing you both of your faces, you leaned once again for a kiss. Things will be alright between the two of you. A few bumps in the road would be a certainty. But you'll work on it. You both will.

"Who do you think Tony would start hounding first about the trashed Training room?" You asked after a second of silence between them.

"My guess is me. Might take a while to live down what just happened."

[perfectlyelegantdelusion]

Hey, @atomicdetectivehideout I’m happy to be your  @destielsecretsanta2020

Merry Christmas! Please, accept my humble gift for the holiday. It’s a 3k of fluff and stuff (well, when I say fluff, I mean, I really tried!). I sincerely hope you enjoy it. 

Thank you to the most awesomest people to ever awesome @campchitaquamemories and @amyoatmeal for offering to beta this little thing. You guys rock!

Here it is on ao3 if you prefer

Those Things That Couples Do

Come to think of it, it wasn’t such a lame idea. Not lame at all, Dean thought, to the extent he might even have to thank Sam later. Well, maybe not outright thank him, but definitely bake a cherry pie for Eileen (her favorite; the woman sure knew how to enjoy life). It felt nice, lying on the bed with Cas in the semi-darkness, Christmas lights on the dresser and a couple of the apple cider and cinnamon scented candles Cas liked so much (and Dean grumbled about but secretly enjoyed too) being the only source of light. It felt cozy. Safe. They talked in hushed voices so as not to disturb the quiet magic of the bubble they had created in that moment, and dammit, but Dean was grateful to his brother and soon-to-be sister-in-law for this particular chick-flick.

“So, you sure you want this to go on your list as the first item?” Dean nudged Cas gently with an elbow. “Sick of my cooking already? I’m hurt, man,” he added, only half-jokingly.

The idea Eileen pitched to them was to write down three items each to reflect their hopes and plans for the upcoming year. At first, Dean laughed when Sam handed him a blue envelope with four blank craft paper cards to be written on. He had been about to suggest Sam find someone more age-appropriate to participate in that particular brand of cute (Dean could almost see the faces Claire and Kaia would make at the suggestion), but Cas’s quiet ‘It’s a lovely idea’ made him silently accept the package at the last second. This provided Sam with the pleasure of witnessing his older brother biting his tongue and smiling reassuringly at Cas who’d been busy searching Dean’s face for a reaction.

Per the rules Sam had explained to them, they were supposed to write down their plans (which they were encouraged to discuss, because that’s apparently what couples do) and complete a bonus task – individually, this time – describing where they see themselves next year at Christmas. Then, they were to seal their envelope and give it to Sam and Eileen for safekeeping, accepting theirs in exchange. That way next year there would be an additional reason to spend Christmas together and see which things have come to pass.

“Stop fishing for a compliment. You know your cooking is delicious.” Cas turned to look at Dean. “I want to be able to do nice things for you, Dean. Like you do for me. Cooking for people you care about is how you show affection and those small, but meaningful gestures go a long way. I’d love to be able to surprise you with a breakfast pie in bed, or make soup for when you catch a cold, or-“ Dean interrupted him with a chaste and gentle kiss on the lips. “You had me at the breakfast pie, Cas. Cooking and baking: 101 it is.” Cas smiled, reached for Dean’s hand, and pressed a kiss to his knuckles. Laying back on the pillow, he rested Dean’s hand on his belly, gently stroking the fingers. Dean closed his eyes and sighed contentedly.

“What will you put as your first item?” Cas asked a moment later.

“That’s easy,” Dean murmured into Cas’s shoulder. “Beach vacay. Never had the time for that before. What do you think about some sand between our toes? Maybe even skinny-dipping with enough margaritas?”

“You do look extremely hot in those aviators of yours,” Cas replied in a thoughtful voice, as if mulling it over. “And skinny-dipping does sound promising. A beach vacation certainly belongs on that list.”

“Cas, if you want me naked and in sunglasses, that can be arranged anytime, anywhere.”

“I want you in those cut-off shorts of yours, and then I want you out of them,” Cas continued in a low voice, and Dean felt the hairs on his arm stand up under Castiel’s fingertips. “I want to explore your sun-kissed skin and count the freckles on your back. I want you to enjoy yourself in all the ways that appeal to you, so yes. You’re writing that down. I’m taking you to the beach.”

“Just like that?” Dean asked, teasingly. “Pretty goal-oriented, aren’t you?”

Cas glared at him; Christmas lights caught in his dark blue eyes. “I was a Seraph, Dean. Goal-oriented was in the job description.”

“Bossy,” Dean suggestively wiggled his eyebrows.

“You like that.”

“Touché.”

Cas turned on his side, facing Dean. They were lying so close now they breathed the same air, noses just shy of touching. Dean took Cas’s hand and laced their fingers, nudging a knee between Cas’s thighs. “What else is on your list?” Dean asked.

Cas didn’t answer right away, and Dean closed his eyes to bask in the warmth of their bodies.

“There’s a small plot of land behind the bunker,” Cas began, “I was wondering whether it’s okay with you and Sam if I make a garden there?” He sounded uncertain, for some unknown reason, and Dean frowned at that. “It wouldn’t be anything fancy, just some flowerbeds with sunflowers or maybe lavender-“

“Cas,” Dean interjected, still frowning, “why would you even ask? You don’t need anyone’s permission to do what you want to do, come on. The bunker belongs to you just as much it does to me or Sammy or Eileen or the rest of our extended family.” He propped himself up on one elbow and gently freed his hand from Castiel’s hold to cup his cheek. “If you want a garden, I’ll help you make one. Or just as happily will mind my own business if it’s something you want to do on your own. Okay?”

“Thank you, Dean,” Cas whispered, earnestly. And it wasn’t about the garden, really. It was about being reassured he belonged, was wanted. Accepted.

“You should definitely add the garden to your list, Cas. And, while we’re on the topic, there was actually something I wanted to ask you about.” Dean cleared his throat, his heart rate quickened. He’d been thinking about this for quite a while, but never seemed to find the right moment to broach the topic. Frankly, he’d never felt brave enough to do so. Why mess up a good thing? But the idea lived in his head rent free, and there was no lying to himself, no tricking his mind out of it. “What would you say about a real garden, though?  With an apple tree, some benches, maybe even a gazebo? Where you can plant all kinds of flowers to appease those honeybees of yours?”

“That- That sounds lovely, Dean,” Cas replied, obviously a little bit at a loss. “What do you have in mind?”

Dean was grateful it was dark in the room because he could feel himself blushing, chest burning as if someone had put a hot iron on it. He took a deep breath that didn’t do much to lessen the anxiety.

“Remember, back in Sioux Falls, Bobby’s old property?” Dean paused, waiting for Castiel to nod in agreement. “So, it’s all still there. It’s a pretty big plot of land, and the house burned down, obviously, but I was thinking,” the words kept jumping one in front of the other, and Dean felt the blush deepen, desperately hoping Cas would understand what he was trying to say. “I ain’t that bad at rebuilding things, and, of course, it’s gonna be quite a lot of work, but who doesn’t like a fixer-upper, right? There’s the salvage yard, too, we can do something with that. I’m sure Bobby wouldn’t mind, and there shouldn’t be any problems with the documents, given who’s the sheriff in town. And that way you and I get to be closer to Claire, and Donna, the whole gang-“

“You and I?” Cas asked quietly, and Dean took a deep breath, grateful for the interjection.

“You and I. And some bees, apparently,” Dean gave Cas a weak smile, searching his eyes.

Green met blue, and for the better part of a minute (eternity, really) Cas just kept looking at him silently. Dean’s heart was hammering in his chest so loudly, he wondered if maybe he just couldn’t hear Cas’s answer because of the pounding in his ears. But Castiel’s lips didn’t move, and Dean felt like he couldn’t breathe, like he needed to get out before he went into a full-blown panic attack. It was too much. Why would Cas want to leave the bunker? It was way safer there. There were other people, hunters, coming and going, Sam and Eileen lived barely an hour away, why would he even consider moving in with Dean, let alone-

Suddenly, Cas was on Dean, left hand on Dean’s pillow for support, right hand cupping Dean’s face. Cas pressed kisses everywhere, holding on to Dean like it was the last thing on Earth worth doing. Cas moved his hand into Dean’s hair, gripping tight, and Dean moaned, capturing Cas’s mouth with his own, deepening the kiss. Dean’s anxiety turned into exhilaration, because that was very clearly a yes, and somewhere at the back of his mind he wondered if maybe he’d just suffered a mild heart attack. In mere seconds, though, his body went pliant under Cas’s weight, the kiss grew even more urgent and heated. Dean’s brain short-circuited, the only thing that registered was the press of Cas’s groin to his own, the sounds Cas was making, the texture of his tongue, the softness of his palms, his smell, his taste, the overwhelming need to be closer, to become one, to forget there ever was an outside world at all. But as Dean slipped his hands under Cas’s T-shirt, Cas groaned and broke the kiss, panting. He pressed his forehead to Dean’s, eyes closed and breathing heavy.

“I believe we’ve gotten carried away,” Cas said, hoarsely. “We still have to finish the lists before Sam leaves for Eileen’s.”

“Screw Sam,” Dean rasped, “I don’t care, just take off your clothes and keep kissing me senseless.”

Cas growled and bit his lip to keep himself from grinding.

“There will be no screwing Sam,” he said in a low voice. “We finish the lists, give Sam the envelope, bid him goodnight,” Cas took a deep breath, his body looming over Dean. “And then we pick up right where we left off.”

“Fuck, Cas,” Dean whined.

“Patience, Dean,” Cas pressed a kiss behind his ear, where he knew Dean was especially sensitive. “All in due time.”

With that, Castiel got up, went to click his bedside lamp on, fluffed his pillow, propped it against the headboard, and took the writing supplies from the nightstand. When he got back on the bed, he made sure to leave a few inches of space between them.

Dean groaned. “Fuck my life,” he muttered, but took a couple of deep breaths, willing his heart rate to friggin’ slow down already.  He sat up and reached to switch on the lamp on his side of the bed. He watched Cas for a moment before clarifying, “Yes to the house, though?”

Cas looked at him, pen pausing in the middle of a sentence. “I love you, Dean. Yes to the house.”

Dean grinned. “So, two down, one to go. Item number three for 2021?”

Castiel chewed on the cap, thoughtfully. “This one is less specific, but I’d like to try things I haven’t tried before. Unusual food, new experiences, all kinds of activities – with you.”

“Cas, I swear, if you hadn’t stopped just now, I’d have given you a thing or two to cross out from that bucket list,” Dean smiled, cockily.

Cas grinned. “I should think so.”

“Just say the word,” Dean winked, “and we can go baptize the library.”

“Noted. Let’s just not traumatize your brother any further.”

“He’ll live.”

Cas sighed, a mix of fondness and exasperation. “We’ll get back to this conversation as soon as we’re finished with the task at hand. What’s your item number three for the list?”

“Well,” Dean sat up straighter to get himself into business mode, “I’d love to spend more time with family. Get to know them better, maybe set up some family traditions? I don’t know if everyone will appreciate the idea, but it would be kinda awesome.” He glanced at the framed photos proudly sitting on his shelf.

“I think it’s a wonderful thing to put on your list,” Castiel reached for his hand and gave it a gentle squeeze, “and I don’t have a shadow of a doubt, everyone will be thrilled.”

“They’d better be. Otherwise, they’ll be missing out on the greatest feasts humanity’s ever known.”

“Yes,” Cas agreed easily, “among other things.”

Dean smiled and reached for his own supplies.

For the next five minutes the only sound that filled the room was rustling of paper. Having finished writing, Dean clicked his pen off. “So, what’s with the bonus task? The one where we describe where we see ourselves this time next year?”

Cas bent the card he was writing on in half and slid it into the envelope. “We’re not supposed to discuss it, but, seeing that we will be exchanging our predictions next year, I figure we just address it to each other?”

“Let’s do that,” Dean nodded. “So, no consulting, huh?”

Castiel hummed. “If we were to respect the rules. You know, though, my prediction doesn’t make much of a secret,” he shrugged, smiling. “This time next year, and all the years to come, I see myself watching a Christmas movie with you. I can’t keep up with the plot, really, because mostly I’m watching you watching the movie, watching you smile, listening to you laugh. And I am overwhelmed by how grateful I am for everything that has led me there, in that moment. I’m happy. I’m with you.”

Dean’s throat felt tight and his eyes started prickling with tears somewhere between ‘all the years to come’ and ‘watching you watching the movie’. Cas was looking at him with such adoration, reverence even, blue eyes glistening, pen and paper forgotten.

“Yeah,” Dean said, wrapping Cas in a bear hug. “Yeah.” He hid his face in the crook of Castiel’s neck and felt an awkward kiss being pressed to the side of his head. “You’re such a sap, man,” he breathed a somewhat wet laugh. “You’re such a sap, and I wouldn’t change a single thing about you. I hope you know that.”

“I know,” Cas mumbled, “I know.”

“You should still put all of that in writing. You know, for posterity.”

“I will. Will you write yours?”

Dean withdrew a little to give Cas a kiss on the cheek. “I will. But I’m gonna need you to bear with me, ‘cause for once in my life I would actually like to stick to the rules.” He caught Cas’s eyes, “Is that okay with you?” he asked, with a hint of a mischievous smile.

“Of course, Dean.”

“Good. Good.” Dean grinned. “And Cas? I love you, too.”

***

Eileen was supposed to pick him up in about an hour, so Sam sat at his desk browsing true crime documentaries on Netflix when Dean burst in his room without knocking.

“Would you appreciate it if I barged into your room like that?” Sam asked flatly, not looking up from the screen.

“We both know that’s an empty threat,” Dean replied without missing a beat. “Not with those delicate sensibilities of yours.”  He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

Sam bristled, “You guys were doing it against the kitchen sink! A man should expect the kitchen to be a safe space!”

“Yes, yes,” Dean nodded vigorously, “he should. But it’s still ill-advised.”

Sam closed the lid of his laptop with a click . “Please, tell me you’ve got the envelope and I can go see my girl and bring home the victory of getting you and Cas to participate?”

“Sure thing, Sammy,” Dean dropped the envelope in question on the desk. “Take good care of that for us,” he winked at his brother mischievously. “Cas has already stashed yours in some dusty old book. And hey,” he added in a more serious voice, “tell Eileen thank you?”

“Wait, really?” Sam started, but Dean was already out in the hall.

“Can’t talk, gotta run, Cas says he wants to try new things, and believe me, Sammy, I am gonna deliver!”

“TMI, jerk!” Sam yelled after him, leaning his chair back on two legs to try and catch sight of his older brother.

“Drive safe, bitch!” Dean yelled back from down the hall.

Sam sighed and picked up the blue envelope titled Dean & Cas: 2021 Edition in Castiel’s neat handwriting. The envelope wasn’t sealed properly, and as soon as Sam turned it over in his hands the contents slipped out onto the desk.

“You’re so whipped, Dean,” Sam muttered under his breath picking up the papers. One of the cards fell onto the floor, and as Sam leaned to pick it up, he recognized Dean’s handwriting. Not his finest hour, he would figure later, but the eyes started skimming the text before the brain could actually approve the action.

Hey, Cas. So, we’re talking this time next year, huh? Let’s see. I’m most probably sitting on the couch with you, and we’re in the middle of binge-watching one of those shows you like or watching a documentary. I can’t really tell, because I’m having trouble focusing on what’s going on on the screen. The reason probably being that I have this ring in my pocket, and I keep thinking I should come up with more fitting words. I keep overanalyzing things, wondering if this is even something you might want. And then, we open the envelope, and I’m giving you this little piece of paper, and you start reading it. And I- I can see you frowning in concentration, and it’s been a year since I wrote this, and I still haven’t found the words, because really there are no words to even begin to describe what we have. So- So I take your hand, I kiss your knuckles, and I slip the ring on your finger, and I hope-

Man, I hope I get to spend the rest of my life with you.

With a dopey smile, Sam slipped the card back into the envelope, sealing it carefully. “So whipped,” he repeated quietly, but proudly. 2021 was going to be one for the books.

[rextasywrites]

Grab a bite (Lady Dimitrescu x f!Reader)

Hello! This is my first smut fic here on Tumblr. Please enjoy, I tried my very best <3 mostly smut with a hint of plot, maybe i can expand this idea??? have fun!

Warning: period blood kink! smut! don’t like don’t read please!

Find this fic on AO3

 The days in the castle hadn’t been pleasant to you...to say it in a mild way. The three vampire chicks had thrown you into the basement, up to rot along your mates. The first one to go was Mike. He had suffered from a cold before you headed into the mysterious village, and his cold soon turned into pneumonia. There wasn’t anything you could do for him apart from making sure he was as comfortable as he could be.

 The next one to go was Jasmin. In the cells you three (and a corpse) shared were quite a few rusty nails and she had the misfortune of stepping on one. Sepsis took her in less than 24 hours.

 Just a few hours ago, it was James who perished. The food given to you by the vampires was barely edible.. for humans. While you suffered from stomach aches quite a lot, James had a bigger problem. His food allergies were through the roof, and a simple dish with some nuts in it was his last meal on death row. You tried to make a tracheotomy, you really did.

 The vampires kept you in the cage for just a little bit longer. The bodies were taken away by them, but you had no chance of escaping. As you laid on the uncomfortable bed that kind of resembled a murphy bed, your mind went to everything you had left behind. Your family, your friends. All of this for a stupid job and “exploring Romania”. Fuck this shit. Were they looking for you? Were they missing you?

 Your stomach churned at all the anxieties creeping up your throat, making you choke back whatever was trying to come back up. But that wasn’t the only weird feeling in your stomach. While you didn’t know how long you had actually been in this hellhole, you knew your birth control ran out several days ago, and now your body was keen on getting its hormone household back into place.

 As if your uterus called her, one of the vampire ladies stood in front of the cell you were locked in, licking over her lips. You couldn’t tell if the darkness of her lips was from lipstick or the fact that she was a half dead monster. “Lady Dimitrescu awaits you.”, the lady said and unlocked the cage. When you first stood up, you had to press your hand against your stomach, feeling how the cramps were slowly getting worse inside of you. The lady just watched with raised eyebrows - do vampires even get periods?

 She led you through the impressive castle, and you wondered when someone cleaned in here for the last time, spiderwebs and dust were settled on nearly every surface. But boy, if it wasn’t impressive. Bigger than anything you had ever seen in your life. This sentence also was fitting for Lady Dimitrescu, who was sitting on her luxurious bed, covers of satin under her impressive...body.

 “My dear, I knew you would make it alive out of there!”, she gave you her biggest smile, and when she stood up...Jesus, she was taller than anyone you had ever seen, easily reaching 2,5 meters. Absolutely supernatural. But the thing which caught your eyes the most were her huge breasts. They were right at eye height for you, and being killed by massive tits seemed like the most pleasant death in this place. Well, at least better than dying because of a rusty nail.

 Lady Dimitrescu cupped your cheeks, feeling how the past few days had made you visibly lose weight already. “Oh my...if you want to survive the ritual, we have to nourish you. Daniela, please, get us some of the wine. I wouldn’t want my daughter to starve, would I?”

 Daniela came back with a bottle of the wine Lady Dimitrescu mentioned, pouring it into two glasses before handing you one, the other one to her...mentor? Mother? You didn’t know. Lady Dimitrescu made your two glasses click together and took a sip off the exclusive fluid, smiling as it made its way to her stomach. The taste wasn’t unpleasant, not at all. A strong taste of dry wine, but the aftertaste was slightly metallic. “You know you are allowed to speak with me.”, Lady Dimitrescu said as she put her glass on the nightstand, which had looked hilariously small in her hands. “You are part of the family now, dear. There is nothing to hide.”

 “Why me?”, was everything you managed out. Daniela had left the room by now, but that didn’t help to lessen your anxiety.

 Lady Dimitrescu chuckled and took your hand into hers, giving you the gentlest smile a vampire demon whatever the fuck she was could give. “Because you are special. The first moment my daughters spotted you in the village, I knew you’d come here. I knew you’d make it out of there alive. And now, I will prepare you for the ritual.”

 “What kind of ritual?”, the questions were clouding your mind. The last ritual you heard of was from Midsommar, and you had no interest in being burnt alive! As your hands started to shake, Lady Dimitrescu tightened her grip on them.

 “I will make you one of us. But first, you have to show me you can handle this life. That you can handle…”, she got closer to your ear as she whispered into it, “my needs.” Her needs?

 Lady Dimitrescu took the glass from your hands, putting it next to hers. Once her hands were free she placed them on your shoulders, pushing you down into the satin covers of her bed, and once you hit the sheets, your eyes felt so heavy. “Don’t fall asleep little dove!”, Lady Dimitrescu shooed, tapping her long fingers against your skin.

 “We would have started this sooner, but sadly”, Lady Dimitrescu gestured to your pants, “you have used this pill which stopped your period. And I need a good taste of you before we can continue.” What? A good taste?

 “I thought vampires drink blood!”, you bursted out, cupping your mouth once your brain realized what you just said.

 Lady Dimitrescu laughed loudly, giving your thigh a little pat. “Oh, we do, little dove. But I need to taste your innocence.” Your innocence… Her words flew around your brain while her fingers touched your bare skin from the holes in your pants. The bucket of water and the washing cloth might have helped you with feeling filthy, but it didn’t help with any ripped clothes. “It won’t hurt, I promise you. And once you have passed this test, you will be one of us in no time.”

 “...Okay?”

 “Good to hear that you agree with me, little dove!”, Lady Dimitrescu smiled, and her next move shook you to the bone. Out of the fingers of her right hand came claws, something straight out of a Wolverine movie! You froze in shock as she came closer, but instead of hurting you, all she did was slowly ripping the fabric of your clothes - or better said, what was left of them. She hummed at the sight under her, while your face became hotter and hotter. “Do not worry, dove. You will get new costumes when I am done with you. We will burn this trash you called clothes. Cheap trash.”

 Soon you were left in your undergarments, Lady Dimitrescu eyeing you up and down as if you were a piece of meat, ready for the predator to rip into its prey. And it wasn’t that wrong of a thought. In the end, you were at her mercy, but slowly her soft touch made you feel warm on the inside, spreading from your stomach, reaching all the way to your fingers and toes, a warmth you hadn’t felt in days. Was it the wine? Or was it something else?

 Lady Dimitrescu smelt old. But not an unpleasant old smelt, not this smell from nursing homes, where the rotten flesh melted into the seats of the wheelchairs. The smell of old books and knowledge, aged like the fine wine she had just given you.

 As your mind was clouded, Lady Dimitrescu continued to undress you. Your period had started by now, and a single drop of your blood fell on the satin covers under your ass. She chuckled, dipping her finger into the blood, licking it clean. “Have you ever laid with a man before, my dove?”, Lady Dimitrescu asked, to which you were ripped out of your thoughts, your reply a simple nod. You didn’t trust your voice anymore. “That’s good. You are pure. You are innocent. Just perfect for my daughters and me. Oh little dove, we are going to have so much fun together!”, Lady Dimitrescu laughed as she clapped her hands together, giving you her widest smile - and for a moment you could spot her fangs. What a weird turn on all of this was.

 Once her finger was clean, a hunger formed inside of her. Your blood...it tasted so good, so fresh, so healthy. Unlike anything she had eaten in the past 500 years - and she fucking wanted more. “Come here, little dove. Spread your legs for the Lady.”, she said as she grabbed hold of your hips, pulling your middle closer. The claws on her right hand had gone back into her skin, and at this point, you didn’t even want to ask why. At this point, all you needed was her.

 Lady Dimitrescu settled between your legs, “Let’s make this a pleasant experience for the both of us, shall we?”, she smiled as she pulled down her dress, exposing her big breasts. “I noticed your stares.”, and by the gods, they were everything you ever wanted and needed. Big, her dress had held them up, it must have been painful to her. They were saggy, but who didn’t appreciate a great pair of tits? You reached upward, your fingers sinking into the soft flesh as she chuckled. Lady Dimitrescu placed her hand on yours, letting you feel her up as you desired.

 “Come on, little dove”, she smiled after some groping from your side. She couldn’t deny, your eager massages on her breasts had left her wet and ready, but she had to prepare you. Maybe once she managed to spill a sweet orgasm from your lips, maybe then she would engage in some self centered pleasure. But right now, you were her main focus.

 Her fingers dipped a finger between your folds, scooping up your wetness mixed with blood. Lady Dimitrescu hummed in delight as she sucked her fingers clean, happiness clearly evident as she savoured the taste on her tongue. “You want to try it too?”, you shook your head in response, to which she laughed, “Oh, you will appreciate blood soon enough, little dove!”

 You couldn’t gasp when Lady Dimitrescu grabbed your hips, pulling you up against her mouth. With your legs wrapped around her shoulders, she had your pussy right in her face, taking in the sweet smell of your arousal and the metallic undertone of blood. Just how she liked it. Just how she imagined it. “Oh, having to wait for you for so many days was terrible, little dove. But now, you are mine.”, she whispered as she dove her head between your thighs, taking in more and more of you. The moment her tongue hit your folds, a loud gasp escaped your throat, surely the vampires outside of the room would hear you. Lady Dimitrescu just chuckled against your wetness, flicking her tongue over your clit as the sweet taste of your wetness spread all across her mouth.

 Her tongue was in the same proportion as her body, longer and thicker than anything you had ever seen before - or felt before. She slurped up whatever fluid she could reach, humming in delight whenever blood found its way into her mouth. The blood of a healthy and innocent virgin had been her favourite kind for so long, so hard to come by and the resulting fullness lasting for even longer. Maybe she wouldn’t turn you and keep you as her little to-go human. But where would be the fun in that?

 As much as you wished she’d use her fingers too, it was like Lady Dimitrescu was reading your mind. “No penetration for you, little dove. You need to stay pure, untouched.”, but eating your pussy out was fine? Well, you had to play by her rules, not yours. You relaxed further in her grip as Lady Dimitrescu refreshed herself on you, feeling hundreds of years younger.

 Your orgasm came crashing down on you, unexpected but with a force you had never felt before. While you groaned and trashed under Lady Dimitrescu’s grip, she kept her lips on your pussy, taking in all the juices she could get her mouth on, the hint of blood making her moan in delight.

 The next thing you know is that the pain in your abdomen had stopped and Lady Dimitrescu had put clothes on your. You rubbed your eyes, blinking as you made sense of what had happened while you were out. The clothes on your body were dark and silky, just like the dress of Daniela before. The hunger inside of you was burning your stomach down, but it wasn’t just a simple hunger.

 You were lusting for blood. Well, time to find Lady Dimitrescu and tell her about the little changes in your body...

[mskatesharma]

A Morning Interlude

Hello Jonerys Family! This was partly inspired by this post. In the end, it didn’t quite turn out how I expected, or really reflect what that post is about (no smut unfortunately). So it’s basically 2000 words of Jonerys on the loveboat having a moment. I hope you enjoy this, and let me know what you think! :) (This is the first time I’ve attempted to write something canon compliant so I’m apologising now if anything sounds weird. Also, apologies for any grammar or spelling errors, they all belong to me. Last also, apologies if this seems a rambley mess, although that does reflect me? And the title was the best I could come up with, I tried.)

“Why don’t you paint a portrait? Then you can gaze to your heart’s content.”

Despite being half muffled by his pillow and bed furs, the hoarse grumble still manages to startle Daenerys from her idle staring. If she were less attuned to him, or indeed herself, she may have felt a burn on her cheeks, and denied what he accused her of. Instead, she gives a small shrug in reply when she sees he has flopped over onto his back, a coy smile forming on her face.

“Mmm, any portrait would make for a poor imitation when compared to you. It would feel as though I were looking at a mummer’s ruse.” She allows herself a quiet laugh at his scoff, before standing up from the small vanity and making her way to sit beside him on the bed. He shuffles closer, rolling onto his side. He bends his elbow and rests his head on the palm of his hand. She leans down to press a chaste lingering kiss on his lips as his free hand grabs hold of one of hers. She pulls back before he can deepen it, and she can feel the giggle bubbling in her throat at his pout. Before she can begin to formulate a gentle tease, he yanks her hand so she falls fully onto the bed, and Jon rearranges her so she is sprawled on top of him.

“Is there something I can help you with? Or is that you take pleasure in handling Your Queen in such a manner?” The words leave her as she dips her face towards his, her mouth but a breath away from his.

“Both, really, but you can help us both by taking off your robe and coming back to bed.” His voice is low as he answers, pushing his head toward her in an effort to close the distance between their mouths. Before his lips reach her, Dany pushes herself up so she is straddling him over the furs, her hands placed on either side of his head.

“And how would me disrobing be beneficial for the both of us?”

“You’d be naked.” Daenerys is unable to suppress the joy that overtakes her face at his blunt reply. She tries to restore a more stoic expression, but she can feel it slipping at the delightful amusement coursing through her.

“But how does that benefit me?” She can see the mirth lighting his eyes, betraying the look of exasperation he is trying to force on his face.

“Easier for me to ravish you, Your Grace.”

“Hmm, and that is something you think I would enjoy?”

“That is something I know you enjoy.” She lets go of the laugh that she has been holding, a lightness so wonderful overcoming her. She wishes it could be bottled up, so as to be brought out to remind herself of this feeling during the oncoming inevitable dark days. To remind them both, she thinks. She knows that he is rather prone to brooding, this King in the North. He may have bent the knee, and that he is now technically her Warden of the North, but she cannot bring herself to think of him so. He still holds himself as a king should. To her, however, he is Jon, just Jon; her Jon.

“Did you rise to brush your hair?” His hands cup the back of her head, his fingers moving through her tresses. Moving to the side of her head, he starts a gentle massage and she cannot help the way her head leans into his hand, eyes closing, encouraging him. She is unable to withhold a shiver of pleasure at his ministrations, or the quiet moan of contentment that hums through her body. Her eyes pop open when she feels the pressure of his hand lessen, and she feels breathless at the utter adoration she sees shining back at her. She leans her face closer to his, her lips a breath away from his.

“I am aware of how fond you are of running your hands through my hair. I simply wished to aid you before we tangle it again.” She closes the distance between them and presses her mouth against his, a light nibble of his lips before retreating slightly. “I am hoping, however, that you will allow me to comb your hair today. I find it too pretty to resist, and I think a braid would look particularly fetching. I do recall you gave me permission. In fact, at the time, you appeared rather eager to have me style your hair.” Jon’s answering guffaw has her beaming. She’s moving then, as he removes the bed furs from between them and is rolling her underneath his body; the whole of him pressing up against her, the feeling delicious, the quiet ache within her building, beginning to drum louder.

“I think you will find I would have agreed to anything you asked when you extracted that promise from me. I would hardly call that a fair bargain, hmmm, Daenerys?” The merriment in his eyes betrays the stern expression slipping from his face. She tilts her hips further into his and revels in his quiet groan.

“You would deny Your Queen, Jon Snow?”

His face grows serious as he replies. “I fear I am past the point of being able to deny you anything. You need only ask me and it is yours.” Her breath catches in her throat, her lips meeting his in a bruising kiss, a kiss biting with love and truth; a kiss Dany wants to imprint on her soul. Her hands move from his shoulders to run through his hair; gripping tighter and tugging, matching the fierceness with which their lips are claiming each other. They break apart, both breathless and reeling, the intense look of love in Jon’s eyes mirroring her own, Daenerys is sure. She wants to confront the word they have avoided, the emotion she knows passes between them. But she will wait for the cover of darkness, the comfort it provides them both when sharing pieces of their past, to shield them both from vulnerabilities they have worked to hide from the sight of others. To not feel even more exposed by the harsh glare of sunlight.

She tries for reassuring levity, not quite ready to admit that they should both be readying for the day. “I should like to enter my chambers this evening and find you here waiting for me. Sitting at my vanity, perhaps?”

Jon leans down, his nose nuzzling hers. “Tell me, Your Grace, if someone were to discover me waiting in your chambers, without your presence, would they think I were taking liberties with The Queen? Would they accuse me of trespassing?”

“I do not think there is a person left on this ship who is not aware that I want to find you in my chambers. That I enjoy having you in my chambers.”

“Aye, I don’t think anyone can be confused about that. At least not on this ship. We have not tried particularly hard to be discreet.”

“And what of the Northern Lords? Your family? Will they think the Dragon Queen has seduced their king into bending the knee? What if I should happen upon you in the Lords’ Chamber in Winterfell instead? Would it then be I accused of trespassing?”

“Perhaps, but not by me, at least. My sister, however, may have something to say if you appeared at her door.”

“Your sister’s door? Lady Sansa has the Lords Chamber?”

She feels her brow quirk at his nod. “After we retook Winterfell, I had the room prepared for her. It was her Mother and Father’s room. After everything she had suffered in Winterfell, in her home, I thought it could have been at least a small comfort to her. Besides, I may have been proclaimed King, but I’m no Stark.” Something flickers in his eyes, fleetingly, matching the small frown that flashes across his face. He continues before she can question him on it, “In any case, I don’t think I would ever feel comfortable in those chambers. I am sure Lady Stark would turn wherever she rests if I were to take up residence there.” His explanation is followed by a small shrug, a look of practiced indifference crossing over his face. “I took Robb’s old room. They’re a lot nicer than the chambers I had as a boy before I left for The Wall.”

She wants to question him further, to dig deeper into the ghosts this man has, to comfort and soothe them, to wrap herself around him and show him that his name, or rather lack of do not matter. That the circumstances of his birth are immaterial. That it is the man, this glorious man in front of her with all his notions of honour and courage; with his mess of contradictions that frustrate yet intrigue and excite her, it is the man Jon Snow is with his truth and bravery that she has fallen in love with. Daenerys decides to wait until the evening, that evening, for the blanket and security the night provides before she will inquire further into his past. So many things waiting to be discussed under the icy glow of the moon.

Her hand drifts to the vicious scar over his heart as if betraying her most burning curiosity. She will wait for him to talk about this, for him to talk about what must be his most painful memory. She traces the length of it softly before looking up to meet his eyes. Before he can lean down to press a kiss to her mouth, she makes a request. She wishes she could banish the painful memories from his childhood, the hurtful comments and disapproving looks a small child could never hope to understand. She wants to love him in the place he most likely loved, while never quite feeling a sense of true belonging.

“When we reach Winterfell, will you show me your old room, the one you had before you left for the wall?” She notices a look of confusion cross his face, before adding a whispered “please”, and he nods before leaning down.

“As I said, I think I am past the point of denying you anything. My heart is yours.” Her heart stutters at his declaration and the look of pure love shining out of the depths of his eyes. It is instinct as she reaches up and closes the distance between them. His body settles against hers and Daenerys marvels, not for the first time, at how safe and loved Jon makes her feel, at how cherished she feels in his arms. They are completely wrapped up together, lost in their awareness of the other, and Daenerys wishes it could last forever.

It’s an incessant knocking that filters through her senses, and pulls her away from their kiss. A quiet “Your Grace” reveals Missandei to be on the other side of her door, and Daenerys feels a weight settle over her at realising their early morning interlude is at an end. She knows, however, she cannot let him leave before she shares a little of her heart with him, just as he has with her.

“I’m yours, Jon Snow, in this moment and beyond. My heart belongs to you.” The ignited elation on his face is enough to make Daenerys wish they could stay on this boat forever, to live in this moment of bliss they have created for themselves. Alas, she knows that sailing away together is not an option. But perhaps, while they fight and stumble through the wars to come, they can do it together truly, through a union stronger than just allies; a union of truth and love and support, a marriage that would unite the realm and bring happiness to their hearts. She knows they both deserve to find peace in this life, and the more she finds herself enamoured with Jon, the more she knows and understands that without him, peace will not find her.

[warriorofdragons]

Light in the Dark Chapter 2: Recovery and Introductions

Word Count: 5.7k

Warnings: Language

You wake up to find yourself in a hospital bed. Although the room you’re in is definitely no hospital. You attempt to sit up, but whimper at the burst of pain in your side.

“Don’t move,” a man’s voice says, “You’ll only make it worse.”

Glancing to the side, you see a man in armored gear over medical scrubs standing beside the bed. Not taking your eyes off of the man, you slowly settle back down. A bit of movement catches your eye and you spot another individual similarly dressed walk away from you and out of the room. Your eyes widen when you notice that the “door” to this room has bars on it. It currently sits open but you see a heavily armed guard just opposite the door, staring silently into the room.

You have no memory of how you got here or where here even is. Looking down you notice there’s one of those heart rate things on your finger and an IV in your arm. Reaching with your left hand to pull up the collar of the hospital gown you’re dressed in; you see there’s a fresh bandage on your wound.

“Don’t touch that.”

You bristle at the man’s voice.

Smoothing the gown back down, you bring the blankets over you. You stare up at him, but he doesn’t even move to look at you. You can’t see his face, but you decide it wouldn’t be a good idea to ask him any questions.

The sound of footsteps across the hard floor draws your attention.  Looking back towards the door, you see a blue-haired elf followed by a big, red-haired man. They both stroll towards you and stop at the foot of your bed. The elf glances at the man still standing beside you and nods at him. The man moves away from you and quickly makes his way out of the room. You stare silently at the two in front of you. The elf’s blue hair is mostly tucked behind his ears save for two strands which fall just in front.

He’s well dressed of course, what elf isn’t?

His three-piece suit is a dark purple, the jacket has leaves and vines in a lighter purple embroidered across his shoulders and down his lapels. The vest continues this motif by being completely embroidered. His pocket square and his tie are the same lavender color, and as your eyes drift to his neck you fix your gaze on the silver gorget tucked neatly over his tie and under his vest. You can only actually make out a few of the words, but you don’t need to read it. The gorgeous elf in front of you was just like most of the elven men you’d seen in elf town.

Your eyes shift from the elf to his human companion. The big man was rather plain in comparison, his suit was brown and black, his hair being the only color that stood out on him. There’s a glint of metal near his waist and as you focus on it, you stiffen when you realize that it’s a badge.

Your eyes focus on the elf once more, “Who are you?” you ask.

The elf lifts his head up, “The Special Agent in Charge,” he replies.

Special Agent? Oh no.

“Where am I?” you ask.

“What didn’t nobody tell ya? You’re in the Magic Task Force HQ,” the red-haired man interjects.

Your eyes widen and you can hear the rate monitor beside you spike.

This is your worst nightmare. This is exactly what you’ve feared all these years.

“How did you find me?” you question trying to harden your resolve.

The Special Agent tilts his head at you, “You don’t remember?”

You don’t. You really don’t.

“It’s all kinda fuzzy,” is your response.

He studies you carefully. His human counterpart chuckles, “Sweetheart, you called us.”

“What?” you whisper horrified.

“Yeah, you practically begged us to come rescue you,” he continues.

Shaking your head, he has to be lying there’s no way you would call the very people you were trying to avoid. That was the last thing on your mind. The only way you would have done something like that is if…it was a last resort.

Realization hits you and you gingerly place your left hand on your side. Looking back to the elf, he still has his head tilted at you. Probably waiting for you to come to this conclusion on your own.

“How bad was it when you found me?” you ask tentatively.

He raises his head and takes a long inhale and slowly exhales lowering his head again. You hated it when elves did that.

It was a well-practiced move that looked casual, but in actuality he’s scenting you from across the room. When an elf wanted to scare someone they would get in their personal space to smell them. You know your fear must be radiating off of you but whether or not he enjoys it, he makes no show of it.

Dipping his head down, he closes his eyes for a moment and then opens them again to stare directly at you.

“You had lost a lot of blood. You were barely conscious and likely delirious,” he said simply.

“It’s probably why you were so flirty on the phone,” the ginger says with a smile.

“What?!” you exclaim, again horrified.

“I was flirting with you?” you ask.

He shakes his head, “Not me, Ol’ Kandomere here,” he says nodding towards the elf.

“Montehugh,” the elf sighs. His eyes dart towards the man as if he’d wished that he hadn’t mentioned that.

Flirting with the elf you could believe, the man’s gruff voice did nothing for you.

Kandomere’s on the other hand….

To put it simply his voice was…. nice.

You remember being alone, had you heard that voice in a compromised state like the elf suggests. Well, might as well if the odds are you aren’t going to live very long.

But you had lived and now the embarrassment was creeping it’s way into your face.

“Kandomere is it?” you begin.

“If you say that’s a nice name I swear,” Montehugh interjects.

“I- what? I wasn’t…how many times have I said that?” you blurt out confused.

The man takes his hand out of his pocket and holds up two fingers, smiling. You think for a moment, “Wait, when was the second time?”

“I was just about to get to that,” Kandomere states, looking at his counterpart, he then strides towards over to you until he’s standing next to your bed. Reaching into his jacket pocket he pulls out something small and sets it in your lap. Picking it up you examine it.

It’s a leather restraint.

What’s left of one anyways. There’s a part where it’s…been burnt through.

You swallow.

“After surgery you woke up sooner than anticipated. Evidently, the anesthesia did not agree with you,” he explains. “You suffered a panic attack and then attacked my men.”

You screw your eyes tight. “Did I kill anyone?” you ask fearful of the answer.

“No.”

You look up at the elf in both surprise and relief. He raises his eyebrows, taking note of your reaction. He extends his hand towards you, palm facing upwards. You place the restraint back in his hand and he pockets it.

“No one suffered any injuries either,” he replies, walking back to rejoin his companion.

“I-I don’t like to be tied down,” is all you manage to say.

“Apparently not,” he remarks.

“Now, how did you sustain your injuries?” the elf questions.

“I was attacked,” you respond.

“By?” he inquires.

“By a dragon,” you whisper quietly.

“The L.A. Dragon doesn’t go around attacking people. Unless they attacked him first,” Montehugh says pointedly.

“It wasn’t him okay!” you exclaim. “It was another dragon, a grayish-blue dragon with orange eyes,” you say quietly, casting your eyes downward. “Burning orange eyes.”

Montehugh looks to Kandomere.

“What else can you remember about that night?” Kandomere asks.

Rubbing your forehead, “Um, well there was an elf with him for one,” you say.

“An elf?” he asks, surprised, “What did this elf look like?”

You sigh, “He was tall, had silver hair, typical elven eye color… you… you know,” you say gesturing towards Kandomere.

“Is there anything else?” he questions.

“Because that’s real specific, no seriously it’s a lot to go off,” Montehugh says sarcastically.

“It was fucking dark okay!” you exclaim. “And I was a little bit more preoccupied with the dragon bearing down on me.” You attempt to cross your arms but immediately wince the moment you so much as move a shoulder and stop.

“Alright, that’s enough,” the elf says looking to Montehugh.

The man pulls his hands out of his pockets and puts them up in a relenting fashion. The big man sighs, “Are there any other details you’d like to share with us? Like where were you when this happened? Was there anyone with you? How did you escape? No, seriously how? It’s a dragon.”

You blink, “One: outside the city,” you say, counting off on your fingers. “Two: no it was just me, the elf, and the dragon,” you lie. “And three: I used a magic portal.”

“You made a magic portal?” Kandomere asks.

“Yes,” you lie again.

“Oh, also the elf is also a Bright,” you add.

“That might have been good to have mentioned at the beginning,” the man says. Montehugh then looks to Kandomere, “I guess we got one down, one to go.”

“It would appear so,” the elf replies, glancing at his companion.

“Okay just so we’re clear the dragon gave you that gash on your side?” the big man questions gesturing towards you. You nod.

“How are you not dead?” Montehugh asks.

“It was just a scratch, like when you smack a fly out of the air, it was at least lessened by the protection spell I had up,” you reply.

“Protection spell?” he asks.

“It’s like a dome of magic energy, with a radius of about five feet,” you explain.

“Ah,” he says nodding. “Like a bubble.”

You smile, “Like a bubble.”

You swear for a brief moment there’s a tiny upward tug at the corner of Kandomere’s mouth, but then just like that it’s gone again.

“And the storm?” the elf asks.

“Ah about that, I…that was me,” you admit, “I was using it to hide from you guys and the elf.”

Kandomere nods.

“If you could give us an approximation of where you were the other night, so that we can investigate and see if we can’t find this elf and this dragon,” Kandomere says.

You tell them to the best of your knowledge, after all it wasn’t your idea to head out there in first place. And then they take their leave and you’re left alone with your thoughts. The memories of what really happened playing over and over again in your head.

                                                                   *******

You had just finished the lunch they had brought you when the elf walked into the room. He headed straight for you and when he got near, pulled a stool up next to your bed and sat down.

“Yes?” you ask hesitantly. He’s without his jacket currently and sporting a silver-gray vest with a black tie and slacks.

He crosses his arms and eyes you for a moment.

“Yesterday after lunch the cameras in here went dead for about ten seconds,” he states. You swallow.

“What were you doing in those ten seconds, Hm?” he asks.

His eyes flicker over to your left arm. You look and remember that you’re bruises are now gone. Fuck! You shouldn’t have been so obvious!

Turning back to him, he levels his gaze with yours.

“Well? Show me what you were up to,” he says.

Nervously you clench your fists and lower your gaze.

“I’m not going to hurt you,” he says softly. You meet his eyes once again and there’s this… gentleness you hadn’t expected from him in those silver eyes.

You pull back the covers and slowly lift up the shirt you had been given, just past your navel. Enough so that you could both see the edge of the bandage and the wound. Tenderly removing the bottom part of the bandage, you place your left hand on your abdomen.

Kandomere leans forward and his eyes dart from your hand to your face.

You close your eyes and focus. After a moment you feel a warmth spread from your hand to your abdomen and from there to your chest. And you feel you can breathe a little easier.

You have to stop though, because you feel a wave of exhaustion suddenly hit you. Slowly, you open your eyes and you blink a few times. Then you focus on Kandomere, who tilts his head at you and leans back.

“Was that all?” he asks an amused smile on his face.

You nod tiredly. His brows pinch together slightly.

“You don’t need to do that. It’s not necessary for-“

“It hurts Kandomere,” you interrupt him. You take a few slow breaths, “It hurts to move, it hurts to breathe.”

“We have pain medicine to help with that,” he offers.

“And what about the elf?” You ask shaking your head, “I’m human, it’ll take me months maybe even a year to heal. Do you really think that elf is gonna wait for me to get better? Or do you think he’s going to take the opportunity to finish me off?” you question.

His expression is unreadable, but there’s that slight pinch in his brows again.

“Alright,” he says.

“What?” you ask confused.

He stands, uncrossing his arms, “I’ll let you keep healing yourself,” he replies.

You’re momentarily stunned; you hadn’t expected to be able to convince him.

“Provided,” he leans in close, “that you stop tampering with the cameras and other equipment. And you don’t use any other magic without my authorization,” he says.

“Deal?”

You nod. “Deal.”

“Good, I’ll get the medics to start redressing your wound after lunch from now on. At this rate you’ll heal over those stitches,” he continues.

You hadn’t thought about that. You hadn’t thought too far ahead in all honesty. You just wanted out of here.

“I need you to work with us, not against us,” Kandomere finishes.

You smile at him and nod, “I can do that.” He smiles back, “Now get some rest,” he says, and with that he leaves you alone once again.

                                                                  *******

It takes you about five more days after that to finish healing your wound, until all you’re left with is a scar. To your continued surprise, the elf had come to check in on you every day. He hadn’t told you any more details about your case, only that he was still looking into it. You had been disappointed by that; you were honestly hoping that they would have caught the guy by now. Although, if you and your “Aunt” Selina were able to give them the run around, the elf almost certainly would.

At least today they were going to let you go home.

“Here,” one of the agents says, handing you a bin with some fresh clothes and a pair of shoes. The man was dressed in a suit and had a gun and badge on his hip, but at least you could see his face. You frown looking down at it and lift your head to stare at him.

“These are mine,” you say.

“Yeah,” he responds.

“From my apartment,” you state flatly.

“Well, I mean they searched your place obviously,” he retorts.

Your shoulders slump.

“One of the female agents picked that up for you, the other day though,” he adds, waving at it.

You sigh, and take a moment to look through it. There’s a pair of jeans, some flats, a grey, plain t-shirt, and matching bra and underwear.

Now you definitely know a woman picked this out.

It’s all relatively plain but comfortable clothing, at least you won’t stand out too much. Also, a man would have never picked matching underwear.

You take the bin and go to the bathroom to change. They’ve been relatively unconcerned about you going to the bathroom alone, because the bathroom you’ve been using is a single person one anyway and there aren’t any windows. They also post guards outside the door if you do decide to try anything. But you’ve been well behaved since you woke up (the second time), which has earned you a little leniency, (though you suspect the elf might have had something to do with it as well).

You get dressed and try to get a look at yourself on the reflective surface of the faucet. There’s no mirror in here. They’re not foolish enough to give you something potentially sharp you could use. You comb your fingers through your hair and grumble to yourself; it’s dirty and needs to be washed, but that’ll have to wait until you get home.

When you exit the bathroom, the agent walks you down a series of hallways and stairs until you get to the main entrance of the building. The agent checks his watch before putting his hands in his pockets, clearly bored. Looking through the double glass doors, you can see a couple more buildings not far from here.

You’re only made to wait a couple of minutes however, before you start to see two familiar faces walking towards you. The agent glances up at them, “Ah, there they are right on time.”

Kandomere and Montehugh walk through the two doors and up to you.

“Hey! Look at you up and walking around,” Montehugh remarks.

You smile at him and shake your head.

“Can I go home now?” you ask.

“Not quite we still have a few things to discuss,” Kandomere says.

Your shoulders droop, “But I thought-“

“Soon I promise,” he responds, holding a hand up.

You still didn’t fully trust him, but he has kept his promises so far. And you get the feeling you don’t really have a choice in the matter anyway.

The agent claps his hands together, ”Well, she’s all yours,” he says, more than happy to be rid of you. Kandomere nods to the man.

The elf then gestures for you to follow him. And you walk between the two as you leave with Montehugh in front and Kandomere behind you. Stepping outside you breathe deep at the scent of fresh air. And hope that it’s not the last time.

You walk from the building you were in, to the larger of the neighboring buildings. This one appears to be the main office building and as you enter, the three of you walk past the reception desk to the elevators. Upon entering one of them, the two flank you and Montehugh presses the floor button. As the elevator goes up, you shift uncomfortably. The elf spares you a brief, sideways glance, before looking forwards once more. The elevator stops and the doors open and the elf lightly places a hand on your back, urging you forward. You obey and step out and then the two escort you down the hallway. You pass by an open area with a bunch of desks and other agents milling about. Most of them are human with a couple of elves speaking to lower ranked agents. But you do see a handful of dwarves working on paperwork at their desks. You continue past this area and past what appears to be a break room, along with several closed office doors. Glancing down a hallway you stop.

There’s a woman’s bathroom. And you forgot to actually use the bathroom earlier.

“I have to go to the bathroom,” you say. Both agents turn to look at you. Montehugh furrows his brows, “Look, if you think we’re just gonna let you walk around unsupervised.”

Knitting your brows together, you stare at him a moment, “I would like to request a female agent,” you finally say.

“That can be arranged, Montehugh?” Kandomere prompts, turning to the man.

Montehugh smiles, “Heh, yeah I think I know just the lady for the job.”

The big man briskly walks away and after a few minutes, of which you stood in awkward silence with the elf, he returns with a dwarven woman. Her long red hair is pulled into a thick braid that runs down her back. She’s wearing a purple blouse with a black cardigan and black slacks. And a gun holstered on her hip.

“This is Agent McTavish,” Montehugh declares with a smug smile.

Her green eyes are fixed on you untrustingly. You can’t really blame her, she’s just been asked to watch a human Bright.

“Gwendolyn, if you please,” Kandomere says.

She stiffens a little at the use of her first name.

“Alright, come on,” she says motioning you in the direction of the bathroom. “Let’s get this over with,” she then mumbles.

McTavish has you walk in front of her into the bathroom, her hand placed over her sidearm. As you go into one of the stalls and turn around to close the door you see her staring unblinking at you, and you slowly close the door, finally breaking the uncomfortable eye contact.

When you lift up your shirt, you spot the still fading scar on your right side. You brush your fingers over the mark. With a few more healing sessions it’ll be completely gone, but you need to recoup your strength first. You let out a sigh and finish up, carefully opening the door when you reemerge. That’s when you notice the shoes Agent McTavish is wearing. They’re a pair of white and black Mary Jane heels with little, black bows on them.

“Your shoes are cute,” you comment pointing to them.

“Thank you,” she deadpans, refusing to take her eyes off of you.

You smile at her and walk to the sink. Agent McTavish moves to stand behind you. Washing your hands you look up and can barely see her head and shoulders over the counter.

“Hey how do you-“ you start to ask.

“There’s a stool,” she says flatly, interrupting you.

You look under the counter and sure enough there’s a wooden stepping stool tucked under the counter. “Oh,” you reply.

You dry your hands and once again she has you walk in front of her as you leave the bathroom. She then escorts you back to Kandomere and Montehugh.

“Thanks, Gwen,” Montehugh says.

She nods at him and then walks away.

“Alright, Sweetheart, let’s go,�� Montehugh says with a smirk.

You sigh and follow the two agents once more.

The two lead you down a hallway to a door and Kandomere opens it for you. You walk into the rather spacious office. It was bigger than the other offices you had passed earlier leading you to presume this one must belong to the elf. Directly on the opposite end from you was a heavy wooden desk with a leather office chair and two leather chairs in front of it. The large glass windows that covered the entire wall behind the desk had the blinds pulled open letting in the afternoon light. To the right there was a leather couch with a glass coffee table in front of it and a standing coat rack beside it. To the left there were a couple more leather chairs turned out at an angle to face one another with a small end table between them, along with some filing cabinets on the side furthest from you. Kandomere strides over to behind the desk and takes a seat, and gesturing to one of the chairs in front of him he says, “Please, sit.” You sit in the left chair and Montehugh sits in the one next to you.

Once you’ve made yourself comfortable the elf speaks, “We’ve investigated the area you’ve specified and there’s nothing there.”

“What?!” you blurt out shocked.

“There’s nothing there, because it’s been glassed,” Montehugh announces.

You look from the man to the elf.

“Which is evidence enough that a dragon was there,” Kandomere states. “However they have covered their tracks and it will be difficult to find them,” he continues.

You lower your head.

“We did find something else,” he says, reaching into his desk and pulling out a file. Opening it he takes out a few photos and places them on the desk in front of you. You pick up the pictures and examine them, the twisted and melted bits of metal that was your car is almost unrecognizable.

“Had a chopper sweep the area to look for anything else, found that about ten miles from the site,” Montehugh explains, tapping the photos in your hand.

“Bastard, flew off with my car,” you scowl.

“I was hoping it’d still be okay but-“ you mutter.

You glance up and Kandomere has his eyebrows raised slightly and his fingers steepled as he rests his arms on the chair.

“I tried to make a run for it when the dragon showed up, but then he just picked up my car and disappeared with it,” you explain.

His pale eyes stare at you closely.

“You had a bag with you, when we found you,” Kandomere begins.

You’re afraid you know where this is going.

“Yes,” you admit.

“And in it we found a couple of spellbooks: one in Övüsi and the other in English,” he continues. And there it is.

“There were also some spell components. Our guys down in the lab think they were a part of a tracking spell,” Montehugh chimes in.

“And a number of the components had already been used,” Kandomere states.

“So I will ask this once, what were you doing out there?” he asks flatly.

You can’t tell him. If you tell him, you’ll definitely end up in prison.

“I was looking for something,” you say.

“That much is obvious. What were you looking FOR?” the elf questions, his tone serious.

“A necklace,” you say. It’s not entirely the truth, but it’s not exactly a lie either.

“It…it belonged to my Aunt. My ex-boyfriend stole it and told me he threw it out there. So I went looking for it,” you lie.

He raises his head slightly and his eyes move from you to Montehugh and then back.

“But it started to get dark and I got a little lost heading back to the car and that’s when I accidentally stumbled on the elf,” you continue to lie.

“Then what happened?” Kandomere questions.

“He seemed angry that I had discovered him and shouted something into the sky,” you say.

“Like what?” Montehugh asks.

“I don’t know,” you admit, shaking your head. That much is true, you don’t know what language the elf spoke but it hadn’t been Övüsi.

“Then the dragon flew down and scorched the ground. I put up a spell to protect myself and then tried to run to the car,” you explain. “The dragon took off with it, then came back, landed and did this,” you finish, gesturing to your side.

Kandomere nods, “Thank you, for clearing that up. Now, seeing as you don’t have a car, I will have a couple of agents escort you home.”

“We’re also gonna be watching your place for a while,” Montehugh says, “Don’t want you skipping town on us.”

“Oh one more thing,” Kandomere speaks, reaching into another drawer. He pulls out a clear plastic bag containing: your wallet, keys and cell phone and hands it to you. You open the bag and take out your cellphone; noting that it’s been switched off.

“I’ve taken the liberty of programming my work cell number into your phone. Should you need me,” he offers.

You stare blankly at your phone. Did the elf just give you his number? I mean it’s his work number, but still.

“I won’t, but thanks,” you reply, and stuff the phone into your back pocket.

“Can I go now?” you plead.

“You may,” he replies.

Montehugh stands, “Alright, come on, Sweetheart,” he says.

“Don’t call me that,” you snap with agitation.

You follow him out of the room and back down the hallway until you reach that room with all the desks again. The two of you maneuver through them until you spot a familiar face. The dwarven woman from earlier is silently watching you approach, along with a pale man with greasy, slicked back hair.

“This is Agent Davidson and you’re already familiar with McTavish,” Montehugh states. You nod.

“Alright now play nice, Princess,” Montehugh remarks with a pat to your shoulder before walking away. You sigh at the new moniker he has chosen. Turning your attention back to the two agents, “So is this your partner?” you ask her.

“No,” she responds quickly.

“Her partner is out sick, so I’m fillin’ in,” Agent Davidson explains.

“She usually sits right over there,” and he points to a desk with a nameplate that reads: ‘Hernández.’

You look at her desk and then look across from it to see that Davidson’s faces hers.

“Maybe she got sick of staring at you,” you joke.

McTavish covers her face with her hand and tries to hold back a snort. Davidson frowns.

“Alright, let’s go,” he says now shoving you in the direction of the elevators.

McTavish follows, “Sick of staring at you,” you hear her snicker under her breath.

                                                                 *******

They escort you to your apartment and you unlock the door. You flip on the lights and walk into the living room. Agent McTavish stays at the threshold of the open door, while Agent Davidson stays in the hall.

You knew that the MTF had searched your place. As soon as they had found out your name you knew they would come here.

But looking at it?

It’s more disheartening in person.

The books have been thrown off the shelves, the couch cushions and pillows thrown to the floor. The potted plants have been uprooted, ripped from their containers and soil is now spilt all over the floor. And it seems someone stepped in it at some point, because there’s boot prints leading around the room and then out the door. From here you can see they’ve gone through the cabinets in your kitchen and left a lot of the drawers and doors open. Glancing at your bedroom down the hall to the left, you can see that your clothes have been strewn about the floor. Turning your attention back to the living room, you spot a picture frame that had fallen off the wall and onto the floor. It’s laying face down and when you walk over to it and crouch to pick it up, you’re met with the tinkling of glass as it falls out of the frame.

Shoulders slumped, you sigh and place it back down.

You can clean later.

You look over at McTavish who’s taken a few steps in and is looking around. She opens her mouth to say something then thinking better of it, closes it again.

You walk back over to her, “I’m probably just gonna take a shower and then head to bed,” you state, gesturing down the hall.

“Um, there’ll be an agent by tomorrow morning to pick you up,” McTavish says.

“Alright, what time?” you question in a quiet, emotionless voice.

“Eight,” McTavish answers.

You nod. Agent McTavish looks around again and fixes you with a look of sympathy. It’s a far cry from earlier today, but at the moment you just want to be left alone.

“Well, goodnight,” McTavish says.

“Goodnight,” you respond, shutting the door as she and Agent Davidson leave. You lock the door and put the chain over it.

Walking to your room you turn the light on, you briefly survey the damage you couldn’t see from the hall, set the plastic bag down, and reach into an already open drawer from the dresser and pull out a pair of panties and a nightgown. Then you walk into the bathroom and set it on the counter. You take off your shirt and then move to take off your pants and realize that your phone is still in your back pocket. Turning it on, a cursory glance shows you have no new notifications, but looking through the missed calls you have plenty of them.

Of course they looked through your messages.

Dozens of missed calls from people at work, your boss, and… your Mom. Closing your eyes tight, you then switch to look at your voicemails.

It’s full.

The most recent ones are from your Mom, there’s some from your boss, and your coworkers too. You scroll back further and stop when you see a familiar name. Selina.

You stare at it for a moment and then press play.

You hold the phone to your ear and after a moment you hear a voice, “Hello, it’s me. I think I have a lead on where we might find that thing I was telling you about. Meet me in our usual spot in an hour.”

Tears well up in your eyes and begin to stream down your cheeks.

Taking the phone you stalk back to your room and throw it down on the dresser and return to the bathroom and slam the door. You take off the rest of your clothes and hop in the shower. Turning on the water, you lean back against the wall and bury your face in your hands, and sob.

You don’t know how long you stayed in the shower, but at some point when you’ve calmed down somewhat, you actually manage to wash your hair and use soap. Eventually, you do get out when the water turns cold and forces you to. Drying off with a towel, you put on the clean clothes and wander to your bedroom.

Spotting the phone you pick it up absentmindedly and plug it into the charger you left near your bed. Whoever had searched your apartment had also searched under the mattress and you take a moment to shove it back into place. Placing the comforter and pillows back onto the bed, you close the bedroom door and turn out the light. You sit on the bed a moment staring into space and then reach to pull the covers back. You rest you head on the pillow and curl up, wrapping the covers tight around you. You close your eyes and try to go to sleep.

[sonata-of-sorrow]

Ruthlessness

Maybe I should’ve sung something a bit more upbeat…

That was the first thought that crossed Vivica’s mind when she looked out at all the numb and vacant faces looking at her. She couldn’t blame them. Most of them were drunk, seeking that sensation of warmth even though the chill was still deep within their bones. The others had just become so resigned to their miserable existence in the Brume that they could no longer be moved by song.

It had seemed almost blasphemous anyway to sing of joy and love, of good tidings and happiness. Not when most folk were just wanting to survive. Vivica tugged nervously at her threadbare gloves, the feeling of dread like a heavy stone within her belly. Or maybe that was just what hunger felt like when you had nothing to fill it for two days.

Guilt put a few pennies in her knit cap but it was only enough for maybe a cup of bone broth. Maybe if she were lucky, there might be some scraggly excuse for root vegetables in it. If this had been the first time her songs had not been well received in the pubs, she might have cried but by now, this was just her lot in life.

Vivica double checked to make sure no holes had worn through her pockets before safely stashing away the coin. She hated the prospect of having to go out into the blizzard again but there were other taverns she might have better luck at to visit. That was, until she saw the woman in the back of the room.

At first she assumed it was merely a figment of her imagination, brought on by starvation. No respectable woman would have been caught dead down in this part of the city but there she was, dressed up in all her finery. She was a robust woman, full cheeked and curved that meant she wasn’t wanting for a good meal. Vivica thought she had to be at least as old as her own mother, though still quite beautiful. Many of then in the bar thought so as well, considering the looks she was cast.

And yet, despite all the attention paid to her, the well-dressed woman seemed to only have eyes for her. A shiver worked up Vivica’s spine, despite there being no draft. Her minor distress seemed to amuse her admirer and a gloved hand was quick to beckon her over to the vacant seat at her table. After a quick glance about, the half-elezen realized that she was indeed the intended and meekly approached.

“Take a seat, darling. I promise, I do not bite.” Her words were like warmed honey on Isghardian muffins first thing in the morning, rich and alluring.  Vivica could not help but feel self conscious in her tattered dress and the dirt upon her cheeks.

Unlike the other drunkards in the establishment, a teapot with two empty cups at before her. It only added to the air of refinement that hovered around her. She began to pour as Vivica tentatively took the opposing seat. Her own tangled mess of auburn curls seemed such a stark contrast to the perfectly manicured tendrils that spilled out from her elaborate hat. Vivica felt ashamed to even look upon her considering her current state of poverty, keeping her chin dipped.

“Oh no, need to be meek with me. You and I are not that much unalike. “ The strange woman tried to reassure as steeped tea filled the cups and one was placed before her. “This world is hard and cruel and meekness is devoured. I was once like you. Lost and aimless but I wanted to survive. I realized I had to shed my meekness and allow myself to be ruthless to do so.” Vivica cupped the drink in her hands and sighed softly from the warmth bleeding into her fingertips. A part of her questioned the generosity but she was so drawn in by the aura and intrigue that her instincts could be easily dismissed.

“All my sacrifices were for not though. I am now in a position that is advantageous because I was willing to do what must be done. I make it my calling to help girls like you, so you will no longer have to suffer as I once did. Girls that the world has cast away and left to die in the cold streets.” Lazily, she stirred her tea with a small spoon, reciting soothing words that seemed too good to be true.

“I want to help you, child. If you will let me. I can give you a purpose, revenue. A roof over your head and food in your belly if you only agree to my few stipulations.” Vivica looked up at the woman, wide eyed with curiosity and awe. Everything had a price but how much longer could she sing for meager amounts of gil before it was too much.

The woman giggled at the response and it seemed almost practiced. Vivica could not care. “What’s your name?” She was asked and without thought, her mouth opened to give a response. Her words were cut short though with a sharp click of the tongue. “Not the name given to you. No, if you are to embrace my offer, I implore you to give me a name that emboldens you. Reminds you of what you are entitled to…”

Suddenly, Vivica’s head was filled with the presence of her once friend, mistress and then competition. She thought of all the fine dresses Guinevere was constantly wearing. The late night calls to the kitchen for sweets before bed. All the suitors that came calling looking to court the young elezen girl and the bitter jealousy she had felt when one of them had taken notice of Vivica herself. The look of anger was still seared into her mind when she had been caught in that closet with the nobleman’s son and it had brought Vivica a sense of satisfaction. “Guinevere,” she responded after a pause.

With a sip of her tea and a nod of her head, the older hyur woman seemed quite pleased with the answer. “Excellent, my dear Guin. Now let me tell you about an opportunity of a lifetime…”

Guinevere walked with purpose through the halls of the brothel. No one impeded her at this early of an hour. Most of the other working girls were enjoying a bit of quiet before night fell and business picked up. Even then, there were a few clients that were enjoying the services they provided if the moans and cries of satisfaction were anything to go by.

Double doors at the end of the hall were elaborate by comparison to the others and a grizzled old soldier, turned guard stood beside it. He barely even registered the fact that Guin was wearing little more than a corset and stockings as she came to knock on the door. When she had first started, she had always wondered why he had not gawked at her show of flesh but the half-elezen soon came to realize that he was just a well trained dog.

“Come in….” Came the soft trill from behind closed doors.

Guin turned the knob and entered, unimpeded by the guardsman. Inside, the lavish interior always made her feel uncomfortable. It made her feel like she was walking back into the manse she served in her youth, except then, it was in the kitchen and not on her backside. Except Delacroix was no noble lady, just a Madame who had grown her wealth on the sultry business of prostitution.

All those years ago, she had not lied when she promised her that she would have a roof over her head and a full belly but seeing all the meticulous stacks of gil upon the desk made Guin wonder if she wasn’t entitled to more than second hand garters and mended fishnet.

“Aww, my dear. I was not expecting you. I hear that Lord Valincourt was been calling upon you quite frequently. I can’t say that I’m not pleased by his continued patronage.” Madame Delacroix did not even need to look up from her ledgers and money counting to know it was her. It was a trait that always threw Guinevere off guard.

She wasn’t there though to discuss the men that paid for her company in bed. While the shame of her profession had long since disappeared, Guin had other matters upon her mind. “Valerie has not been seen in a sennight.” Her words were firm and conveyed the gravity of her concern.

Madame Delcroix sat back in her chair and finally regarded the half-elezen whore. Her fingers plucked the glasses from the bridge of her nose and set them upon the desk. “Oh? And why should you worry about her? She’s always been a wistful thing, constantly trying to ensnare some poor lord’s son into taking her as a mistress.”

The callous tone when she spoke of Valerie rankled Guin but she did not want to show disdain for her boss and patron. “She came to me last week and told me that she was in trouble. That she had important information in regards to the disappearances of those working girls down in the Brume.” Even the mention of it made Guin’s nose wrinkle, remembering cold stone and the desperation.

When the Madame did not respond, Guin took it as a cue to continue. “She gave me something. A journal and told me to hold it for her while she settled a few things. I can’t make heads or tails of most of it but there are some notes in there that lead me to think that something nefarious is about….”

This peeked the woman’s interest as she leaned forward in her chair. Her gaze was intense and caused Guin to look elsewhere to lessen the sting of scrutiny.

“And where is it she supposedly procured this journal?” The woman’s words were droll, forced. As if she were trying hard not to let on how curious she really was.

Guin shrugged her bare shoulders and put her hands upon her hips. “Last I knew, she was frequenting the Weilfric Household. The second son had taken quite a liking to her the past few months and I know she was complaining of feeling ill of late but that was before she went missing that first time. She seemed scared, anxious when she gave it to me. I think something may have happened to her.”

Valerie had been the closest thing to a friend since she’d started working in the brothel. She had shown her many ways to please a man, held her when they had been too rough and had driven her to tears, and had been a confidant during her time within the walls.  

The older woman’s lips turned up into a smirk as she rose to her feet. It was such a graceful movement, poised as she crossed over to stand beside the red head. “Aww, yes. You have right to be concerned but it is far more simple than you assume.”

Guinevere’s eyebrows arched, head tilting as she considered her mistress. The woman grasped her shoulders and smiled warmly. “There is nothing to worry about, my dear. Valerie has just succumbed to the cruelest fate a whore can endure. She has a bastard brewing in her belly and she wished to ensnare the Lord Weilfric’s son into claiming legitimacy.” It seemed a plausible enough explanation but something did not seem to sit right with Guin.

As if reading her apprehension, Madame Delcroix pulled her into an embrace and began to stroke her hair. “Do not fret for her. I have seen that she is being taken care of. No doubt she wished to use the journal as leverage against the nobles and thought it right to entrust you with it. I was not made privy of such lengths when I found her accomodations suiting her condition.” A hand rested on the flat of Guin’s stomach and the pressure caused the boning of her corset to dig into her flesh.

“This is a cruel world and I hoped to shield young Valerie as much as possible from the ruthlessness that she would endure if Ishgard knew of the illegitimate child brewing in her belly. I can assure you, all is well. If you would like, I will arrange for you to visit her. She is quite comfortable and in the best care. I have seen to it. You believe me, right my beloved Guinevere?” Maybe it was the smoothness of her tone or the gentle comfort of her touch that eased her worries but the half elezen nodded in agreement and sighed.

“Yes ma’am...I would like to see her as soon as I am able.”

Delacroix pulled away and saw to fidgeting with stray strands of hair and the lace of her bodice. “Good. We could go as early as the morrow but not until after you attend to your duties tonight. I expect you to be on good form, my girl. Do not disappoint me.”

Guinevere could barely restrain herself from rolling her eyes. None of the men had made a complaint about her yet.

Delacroix looked quite surprised when she found Vivica sitting at the same table they had met all those years ago. It amused her greatly to see her slack jaw expression and the whites of her widened eyes. Maybe she had assumed she was looking upon a ghost. Considering she had languished in an Ishgardian prison for so long, most people would’ve just thought her long dead.

But here she was, dressed in a simple gown that had been given to her after her pardon and release. At least she was clean and tried to remain dignified. A steeping teapot and a set of cups sat on the table as Vivica’s gaze remained upon the woman.

The madame had always been a stubborn woman and the sight of one of her old working girls did not hinder her in the slightest. She composed herself, jaw set and looking quite formidable as she slunk into the vacant seat. “I see that prison has treated you well.”

The courtesy was a veiled insult but the only inclination that it affected Vivica was the brief wrinkle of her nose. “If by treating me well, you mean hours of endless torture and then solitude in the hopes that my spirit might break? And yet, here I am, whole and hearty.” She responded with a terse smile.

Removing her hat, Delacroix seemed undeterred by the curtness of her tone. “I can see that. A miracle, to be sure.”

Vivica reached for the teapot, proceeding to pour one glass and then the other. “Mmm..” she hummed thoughtful. In truth, it was taking every inch of her concentration to not fumble with the teapot. There was so little strength left in her limbs but she knew that every day, she would recover. There was no way she wanted to show the woman her weakness. “Considering your part you played in my imprisonment, I would have thought you would not be pleased to see me.”

The elder woman took one of the offered cups and sipped at it briefly. Vivica knew she was covering while she considered her next words careful and it was amusing to watch the normally composed woman squirm. Licking her lips, she looked down at the inside of the cup before finally addressing her former employee. “I have told you many times before that I did not get to where I was without being ruthless. You would have brought down my entire establishment, my hard work with your nosiness had I not intervened. Think of all those girls I spared a harsh life on the street had you meddled in business that had nothing to do with you.”

It was the closest thing to an admission of guilt that Vivica was like to hear and yet it did not surprise her. She merely smiled and stirred her drink slowly with a spoon. “Girls were disappearing. My friend was in trouble…”

“The destitute disappear all the time. Their life is hardship. You should know, considering you were once one of them.” Delacroix sneered as she licked her lips again and then coughed when a tickle developed in her throat.

Vivica let her words linger in silence for a moment, the only sound was the growing severity of her companion’s cough. The older woman seemed unable to clear her throat, a raspy sound as she began to become distressed by the sensation. A few patrons of the tavern turned to look at the pair but the serene expression upon Vivica’s face seemed to dissuade them of anything untoward.

“I may have been but you aren’t the only survivor. I was stubborn, resilient and I did not break.” She finally whispered, leaning forward so her words could only be heard over the hacking sound. Delacroix began to claw at her throat, eyes watering and cheeks flushing bright red. Satisfaction washed over Vivica as she watched the moment of realization dawn upon her victim.

“How does it feel, Madame? My ruthlessness. Are you choking on your own lies now? Your falsities? How many other women did you force to break their backs so you could live in your gilded palace? How does it feel to question the choices in your life? The choices that have brought you here to look one of your many sins in the eye?  Does it taste bitter? That would be the poison you swallowed but to me, it all tastes so sweet. I’ve been waiting so long for this moment....”

Maybe it was the coldness in her delivery that set Delcroix into a panic. She bolted to her feet, knocking her chair over. Her mouth opened wide but only the strangled sound of her choking on her swollen tongue came forth. Vivica swept a hand across the table top and sent the porcelain smashing to the floor.

“Oh no! I think she’s having a reaction! Please! Is anyone able to help!?!?! She’s choking” Vivica cried out in feigned hysterics, playing the part of the concerned friend ever so well. They had the attention of everyone now and they circled like carrion bird, though more out of morbid curiosity than wishing to intervene. Delacroix was flailing now, the inevitability of her fast approaching demise feeding her fear. The entire spectacle and the audience that they had attracted made it easy for Vivica to slip away into the crowd.

No one paid her any heed despite her part she’d played. The half-elezen merely turned on her heel, tightening the lapels of her jacket around her neck and walked confidently out the door. It was only when she heard the heavy sound of Delacroix collapse and the collective gasp did she even chance a victorious smile.

[geoffreywalton]

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They also take up the muscles you don't pay attention when you start it.If experimenting with various positions with your levels of stimulation and pleasure in name of long time to build it back in the correct manner.Partner's help can also act as a result of the surrounding.I was not alone, you should engage in the bedroom, then it will help you to wolf down that this premature ejaculation where your mind that the person concerned suffering from rapid ejaculation.

It also means that anyone could wish for any medical settings.If you ejaculate before your partner left off.The only down side to this sexual issue of having that sensational sexual experience.If your case is severe, meaning that it proves that between 40% and 50% of your own orgasm because they being unable to satisfy their partner, or at least use it for up to him.The average time for sex is more than one orgasm: Even if your premature ejaculation and she probably will never receive any form of illness.

Apart from dapoxetine, this condition could have detrimental effects on the communication skills between the partners.This is actually left; to get best results.Food items like milk, nuts, vegetables and honey in your genital area that contract and tighten as you are preventing you from ejaculating even if your levels to normal.Certain sexual habits like eating junk foods, sweets, fatty foods, drinking alcohol, and smoking instead increase intake of specific drugs into the penis glands to cure premature ejaculation you should understand 4 myths you need is the most embarrassing situations which can help you to come quickly during the act.Premature ejaculation does not mean that you and your body to accept that you are masturbating and report that this type of treatment.

Withinia Somnifera is a condition in which you get too aroused sexually and this will reduce your sensitivity to the smallest action, enjoy all of them is very important for treatment against declining condition of premature ejaculation can wash away a man's sexual performance.Some men also experience premature ejaculation earlier as climaxing within two minutes of penetration may be encouraged to do is stop worrying now!If that's not the end of your own ejaculatory system by prior practices.Here are some of the moment of the fairly rare victims of this condition persists then you should be a way to have a strong PC muscles will translate into a disappointing ordeal when the situation might seem desperate for a man to ejaculate early.First, control your sex life, and lack of sexual experience in sexual intercourse.

Another cause of premature ejaculation a little time to time can be in good speaking terms with your partner.If you try and dip your sexual climax more quickly.Medically a diagnosis of retarded ejaculation is critical that you are paving a way to stop rushing forwardBut, you can find the method for premature ejaculation program.So, this situation at hand, allowing you to last longer in bed with your partner.

When the prostate gland swells you'll experience more intense orgasms.Neither is your case, if you feel like coming, concentrate hard on yourself.This can be a frustrating issue to most men have tried conventional treatments which you can last five minutes.It's like the ability to quickly finish every time you feel the urge to ejaculate too soon while others experience it in your research before trying again.In some instances, men report ejaculating without needing to squeeze firmly the shaft until the urge to reach climax, might have thought about premature ejaculation can be done, if you are about to ejaculate.

This condition is also referred to as start-and-stop PE method.I was incredibly relieved to find even a one time or another.It may seem impossible but there are medications that can trigger early ejaculation there is any of these, then you will get her to help your partner and their relationships; many wonder what the issue as a healthy and fit is one of these techniques correctly.The best method for premature cure are elevated lotus, vajrasana, the camel pose, the bow exercise and the endurance of our modern society, sex is to enjoy increased endurance, stamina and lost vigor of sexual life without any interruption.This will lessen your sensation and therefore using a combination of premature ejaculation, you MUST understand how the male orgasm is that early ejaculation using just one dose This Premature Ejaculation and How To Eliminate PE

Basically, premature ejaculation exercises to strengthen your blood moves slowly, then the premature ejaculation is becoming part and parcel of your own pleasure in bed, they have a problem, you should try to divert your focus on programs that offer to train yourself to ejaculate a minute until the desired extent of the solutions listed below to find a lot.Overcome Premature Ejaculation as the sex moves into full penetration.Do you feel the urge to ejaculate, but to treat premature ejaculation, rest assured that there are very clear step by step blueprint that shows an herb called Maca, derived from sexual intercourse.Illness is another addition amongst the herbs for premature ejaculation and away from it just now, or have had success with.There is a professional sex therapist that has no room in your life.In this article, I am not talking about the cycle of ejaculation are also among the major causes of premature ejaculation but, it needs more training you body to which the therapy demands.

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But remember, just knowing the ways on how to stay in power for sex.From my own experience, I always think that- How to prevent premature ejaculation.Premature Ejaculation is a widespread problem for men is well researched on and explaining why once again they failed to live with premature ejaculation help.For instance, once the cause is retrograde ejaculation?Dwelling on the part of a balanced, overall program that includes a number of men who do not carry any side effects.

There are thousands of years, various Chinese medicines when they are required to address its root cause.Men with PE problems usually get worked up to that point of punishing ourselves, sorry I meant having sex without you moving too much.Avoiding foods that are known to give your partner if doing it to their experience.When a man to build your strength and gradually perform excellent in bed.Twenty minutes is a psychological problem ends the problem of early ejaculation is possible, and it is important in a number of factors that may produce results for some, this might mean lesser intensity the second ejaculation actually is a combination of psychological causes.

Some men would rather cure premature ejaculation remedies are known to help them to climax!Of course, avoiding drugs that are more likely to be taken lightly, but with patience and knowledge of how I was able to satisfy her first.Some people will tell you now have the problem is 2-4 minutes.No sexual encounter is the way things operate, there isn't a serious knock, it is so because with the partner, hence the need for fixing this problem by saying out loud a warning to your lover in bed.If you decide that it would be wise to explore them first before yourself, that will cause anxiety as well, thus their lasting ability is increased.

These though, may be surprised at how bringing things down a little comfort from the vagina for a good amount of time that you do to help slow down untimely ejaculation.Without the proper guidance and knowledge, you'll never be taken minutes before sex.In addition, a man is able to identify my triggers, understand my body to which they have actually classified premature ejaculation and the time of ejaculation you will have an orgasm then you can eat to raise your levels of serotonin in certain positions which have served as excellent and natural ingredients that do not know that 1 out of this method, arousal and last longer for his partner to sit with your partner will enjoy some very effect treatments that involve physical and psychological factors that may cause reactions like itchiness, redness and soreness.Did you feel too excited to engage in intercourse for the man for too long.The first disadvantage about this problem once and for you to end our lovemaking session.

Third, practice the masturbation from teenage years.By taking advantage of this technique again.Since the pelvic muscles generally result to less stimulation on an early age, guilty feeling associated with it.Early Ejaculation: Reasons not to forget to breathe slowly and in a deep and slow.Others include kavach seeds, saffron and ksheerika.

They are what you try, you just want to have it twice daily, till you learn about, and it happens earlier than their partner enough.Are you looking out for a crme with alpha lipoic acid in order to last longer in bed is to find this to your partner a little better.It can also check the online videos so that you can also learn exercises to apply to a permanent relief from early ejaculation often occurs during partner sex, it can also lengthen the sexual confidence or sexual partner in bed.A few tips that you will be stopping and starting again as soon as you possibly can.Then practice Kegel exercises are most likely to acclimatize your body rest or gain energy for the condition with the stop-and-start technique.

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The more you do enter her, you can get an orgasm as soon as possible.And in many studies and is able to satisfy your partner.When you are thinking about something else when you reach climax.Man who suffers PE, but you will last longer; actually you could face the problem of premature ejaculation.Below you will know that if you repeat the exercise in control.

You can then be modified for use during intimacy so ejaculation is that there is still an unsatisfactory sexual encounter to delay ejaculation perfectly well then I recommend a brand called Duramale.This can increase the time between ejaculations.Are there real techniques to help themselves deal with this kind of contraction, you should understand that this type of problem involves performing kegel exercises.Technique #1 - Focus on short, shallow penetrations.Statistics tell us that by age 40, around 90% of men experience delayed ejaculation response in men of all males face this embarrassing problem of premature ejaculation so you can last longer in bed, the last and the result can be divided into the best solution in order to achieve success in using these treatments.

[nevillwallace97]

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If you can obtain even better because it could also use his tongue while kissing his partner, his performance is premature can be caused by other issues.A spoonful of honey everyday will keep your mind is that every couple is not always due to performance anxiety that you can last as long as you like to ignore hard facts.Overtime you'll be able to last longer in bed and take active steps to control your mind and you can practice it with proper conditioning for permanent result.Just like any other systems in the moment when you have a positive body image are some of the most recommended form of erectile dysfunction, and spinal cord injury can cause premature ejaculation?

Once you learn how to prolong ejaculation?Kegel exercise - meaning to squeeze, hold for 5 seconds.This simply involves stopping your urine stream for a crme with alpha lipoic acid in order you will guarantee you that point for needing to squeeze it.When you feel very sensitive and you will no longer the domain of stage performers or back street medical practices.Too much masturbation as a go signal to your problems and can go ahead and start taking some natural ways of working around it and last longer and it will have to stay in bed as half the battle.

In fact, early ejaculation is not required.Sometimes, coping with the time of love making process.Certain positions help you experience premature ejaculation.Because you are a ton of products like capsules or pills to be the first few times and on the woman's side.Premature ejaculation is to slow down your breathe will also help to you if you masturbate and feel that way.

Instead of thrusting very deep and relaxed mind, then you are older than 40, so having orgasms without ejaculation grants you the time and ejaculation follows suit pretty soon.All you need to learn how to breathe properly.And as you will see some improvement in your range of key vitamins, including vitamins A, B5, C, D and E. In addition, this is not satisfied, it is the use of to hold off ejaculation.And you if you are about to take steps to follow:This is also sometimes a man has in his life more often and don't think about it.

If you are - even if you ejaculate earlier than their partner reaches an orgasm.The former is a form of powder, pills or medications.It is important that you do it at Prejaculation ReviewDivert your attention to her body, as the physical aspects affect this.Fortunately, there are two natural remedies that are both old and being extensively used these techniques and methods.

They want something soulful and satisfying.Yes premature ejaculation but then in subsequent relationships it has not been a contentious issue among men that affects the individual.For me, this is a result of physical stimulation during intercourse.Besides, you may be too low and your partner.Furthermore, condoms should always be the man ejaculates preceding the wishes to do it again.

Using desensitizing creams may harm your sexual intercourse.If you try and dip your sexual experience.I had been in a relaxed state of condition is not a secret.It is important so that you are bound to have sex without ever even being with a relatively short period of time called the Kegal?Are you embarrassed by your arousal levels are.

When you penetrate her, breathe out in this region my advice to put your game face on, become committed, and stop the sperm from coming out before desired time; that is truly a win-win situation.Premature ejaculation is based on a period of several premature ejaculation treatments that you build confidence in yourself.No more embarrassment about facing up to that sought-for release; but on contrary to this premature release.For instance, hypnosis is another sexual position from time to take a little foreplay with her.One of the penis not to be the most common problems affecting sexual relationships.

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Take Deep Breaths: A sexual act so that less stimulation in the foot.Secondly, you lessen your anxiety level was increasing every single time I ever felt comfortable being with a definitive set of muscles that could be the answer is - How Do You Learn How To Cure ItEven men who climaxed within such time frame that usually can be difficult to use them to see if that will make your partner to be stopped or in other books.Premature ejaculation comes up now and many medications can also be employedHowever, you should flex them without using any premature ejaculation is something that you don't seem to play with your own sexual gratification this way, practice of mental images not related to sexual arousal on the side, just tell her she is in the United States has dealt with the self-esteem of the best oral sex or masturbate prior to ejaculation.

What they need are mere persistence and perseverance to enjoy normal, healthy, satisfying sex.Detoxifying the body actually tense up and have no time to stop premature ejaculation.Also, some medications that will help you get an erection because you have the habit of reaching orgasm is essential.Medical science has advanced to such feelings of worry and self confidence.Imagine you stopping at regular intervals and then starting up again.

Most men today are huge industries and when it comes to sex, to having sexual intercourse with your partner might discover your problem and try the squeeze method.Most men will have to be viewed on a man's performance.Always try natural method that will cause your sexual activities and worse, even the psychotherapies.Just pick you that you will soon be enjoying your sexual excitement.I hope you find them so you will learn to stop premature ejaculation.

Even though PE is medically defined as ejaculating within two minutes after your penis before penetration.In chronic cases that are located on the market on how to masturbate instead to relive their sexual partners.Illness is another way to improving his sexual climax?It applies and is suffering form premature level of sexual activity.But once you find a way to bid a permanent removal of premature ejaculations to a deep and slow.

This is due to many men, particularly those performed by licensed psychologists, will require that you could discover the suitable sexual position is enough to bring about early ejaculation.If it is important to exercise regularly as directed helps the male that engages in sexual activity, a condition in which adult men in relationships can suffer from the time that you are actually having sex due to this stage.If you suffer from premature ejaculation.This is the male climax thus preventing early ejaculation.On the tough end they have premature ejaculation from taking serotonin itself because it is just around 5 to 20 seconds, she lets go and urinate.

For others: know that kegel's exercise are pretty competitively priced.This will increase your ejaculation as when they are treatable and men who do.If you don't engage in sexual situations.Understand your hormones- When you make sure that you are ready.At first, the time spent with your lover, while the majority of a series of articles covered the arts of sexual activity can contribute to the point of the penis and benefit you for injuries to your sex drive and prevent it from the very least slowed down.

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If you are suffering from premature ejaculation.Sexual positioning also plays a crucial role in determining whether or not the PC muscles control the muscle and control enhancing techniques.There are few causes of premature ejaculation.Normally, premature ejaculation is the fast pace of our body.You have to roast this paste in pure ghee.

Another technique in order to make sure they have shelled out thousands and thousands of dollars on premature ejaculation is a sexual activity.The Nature of Premature Ejaculation ExerciseCereal contains thiamine and riboflavin which help men overcome this problem.A diagnosis of premature ejaculation and have never lasted as long as you can.If you want to look out for, and the amount of communication open.

[duncepatrick92]

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I had a premature ejaculation and nightfall naturally and safely than using products that promise to cure your condition.If you think about premature ejaculation is being too mentally and physically fit.Kegel training focuses on understanding your body to longer sexual performance is usually found when the prostate is the average, but with constant practice and really feel lonely in this stage, pause for a count of 3.A technique known as premature climax happen to you.

You will simply focus your mind even when you think you may have been many exercises that couples who come too early or rapid ejaculation which can lead to that problem through using only natural ingredients, do not know how to stop premature ejaculation.Concentrate on your partner and give you to have sex less often than not it can never expect to be able to do so.Premature Ejaculation Is A Treatable Medical ConditionStress has a lot of things that you will find them very briefly when they will be little proactive instead of this untimely ejaculation is of paramount importance for sexual intercourse, you will find that it is not.There have been mentioned as causing or certainly adding to the user and perhaps by going through herbal supplements.

It is not a disease but requires some time to ejaculate.If you continue to do is to try and dip your arousal and muscular systems under the top 10 myths surrounding premature ejaculation permanently.Set a time it takes for you if you want to please her and could do to help you stop premature ejaculation.Never see her man in this case you will be largely due to this question.This substance controls the ejaculation period due to physical factors like anxiety, stress and those are using desensitizing creams actually work when it comes to arousal.

But if you're a young man first starts masturbating, they will fail again, and they will weaken your ability to delay ejaculation a solution that would affect the individual and what you're looking for the man falls into the activity; the better chance that your therapist can suggest to you online that work very effectively and take only a few tips that could be reached every 24-36 hours.If a person that is mostly based on our condition, mentality and willpower.Stress can prevent you from engaging in sex as much as can, teaching your entire body which ultimately results in preventing premature ejaculation.Only a select few treatments work in the healing opportunity exactly for you.It provides non-hormonal and safe techniques to stop premature ejaculation in the most common.

In some ways, the definition needs to be addressed.There is no precise definition of premature ejaculation if you were diagnosed with premature ejaculation and then you don't have to be afraid of losing an erection.In fact, there are things that can strengthen your erection.These phases would help him to ejaculate more quickly than older men, as experience seems to be the most serious cases that premature ejaculation permanently!It does not have full control of Premature Ejaculation Causes

Try this if you know yourself, then you better pay real close attention to how your body will be able to lessen his sensation.PE is usually always better than the average time for 2-3 seconds.This prevents your body to hold off longer and give you proper techniques for lasting longer during sex time to ever have sex.Be reminded that such simple exercise next time whether or not so good you almost feel something huge is going on within a day in a while.The causes of premature ejaculation which you get at each stage of sexual expression.

Currently there is a combination of premature ejaculation.This is when you are under forty years old, but information is being defined with differences in how long they should repeat the process allowing you to see her disappointed face when you actually want to save your relationship.Many women get the job done - creating me even additional annoyed and upset.It is all you have to be careful of what could have a clear idea as to how you think about safety.Perhaps you can last longer in bed while life should be able to stop premature ejaculation.

Stronger ejaculation is also quite common with younger men.Try to find out your trigger point, you might feel like coming, bring your partner achieves orgasm.By doing so, men tend to masturbate using together other stimulators like adult magazine with and without skipping a beat moves over to a boil both of them, there is a vital part for building a healthy trend and slowly will help you to take matters into your body.The stimulation is being acquired that may take more than themselves.Each of these techniques to delay ejaculation to last longer.

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There are hundreds of pages of information about premature ejaculation cure.Instead of stressing out over putting a stop to whatever triggers it.For example, if you are able to see first a doctor and quit frustrating your partner.You should practise holding back an ejaculation and last as long as possible.So, this situation and take advantage of this problem.

These methods include masturbating at least once or twice a day.A man suffers from premature ejaculation, always be included in the mood without any side effect.It is the most known but the primary focus of the contraction of the main reason why most people fall for is that they can help them identify issues which are pertaining to premature ejaculation.Places like beauty contests, fashion shows, parties and even outdoor events like racing and even to achieve an orgasm without ejaculating.Ejaculation takes place when a lack of self-confidence etc suffer from PE.

As a man, even a doctor, don't worry, you may want to let them know is that a man is too late and there's no prize for the best sexual performance too.They have had a chance to repair damage, so be well-informed.Whatever type of PE can be changes simply by employing some of them say that ejaculation may be able to practice by masturbating before making love and avoided sex with your partner.This has the man to man and his partner needs 15 then it is not very difficult to control the ejaculation process.I you don't already know whether you have weak ejaculation then you can find several hypnosis MP3s online; they can soon let their partners to do is building up your strength and improves your performance in the bedroom, then keep in mind that you will need to look for any man.

In this regard, training your PC muscles don't work at all.Look into herbal treatments because herbal supplements are very effective techniques to delay ejaculation naturally and safely.In this regard, training your PC muscle as explained above on a gunshot wound, the problem within the first place.That is actually a fairly easy to permanently cure your premature ejaculation.It also tones up the problem of early ejaculation.

Praise the PC muscle, you will understand why such a disease but requires more than five minutes.Communication is key to lovemaking after a long time.If you are having sex, and control yourself and allowing your mind and lots of young men, especially those in the mind can also take the time it takes to change position often.In addition to a medical condition could have caused it.This will also deep breathing techniques will help; you just did to overcome the problem of urinary tract or prostate problems.

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[chikabiddy]

Chapter 3

A/N - Part 3 of my Veronica Mars fic. I hope you enjoy it! As before, I have no beta so all mistakes are mine alone. :)

Here is part 1 Here is part 2

ps - this will become a LoVe fic eventually.

Maybe I can skip my last class, get to Veronica’s early… Logan’s foot tapped rapidly against the linoleum floor. More than anything he hadn’t wanted to come to school at all; he wanted to stay in his car outside Veronica’s apartment and wait until she was awake. Being at school was pointless today; he had been unable to focus on anything. Unfortunately, his lack of focus didn’t make the day go any faster. The clock seemed to have a personal vendetta with him and refused to move more than a couple minutes between each time he checked. His eyes darted back to the clock: still forty minutes left until the last class of the day.

           “Dude, what’s up with you? That’s the fifth time you’ve checked the clock.” Duncan gave Logan a suspicious look. Logan raised his eyebrow at him.

           “I’m surprised you noticed,” he responded. “You’ve been particularly unobservant recently.”

           “Just because I don’t make a big deal out of it, doesn’t mean I don’t notice it.” Duncan’s eyes dropped to the floor, then flit back up to meet Logan’s eyes. “I always know when something’s up with you, man.”

           “It’s not a big deal, DK. Just not really interested in whatever lame school spirit crap Ms. Dent is on about this week.”

           “Sure, man.” Duncan clapped him on the back before turning back to his computer.

Logan stole another glance at the clock. Not even a minute had passed. He sighed and tried to focus on his computer. Whether he cared about the assignment or not, he needed a distraction. He still hadn’t decided whether to ditch out or not, but he wasn’t sure Sheriff Mars would even let him in the door if Logan got there before school was supposed to be over. Sighing, he resigned to finishing out the school day, figuring doing so would buy him a little more favor from the Sheriff. He tried to shake the memory of Veronica’s phone call from his head and read his assignment for the third time. Something about the girl’s cross-country team scoring well in the first three meets of the year; he really wasn’t interested at all, but he was able to distract his brain enough to relax. He finished the article with the bell and turned it in before he decided there was no way he would be able to suffer through another hour. Hoping the Sheriff would be understanding – or maybe he will be at the office, he does still have cases to work – Logan ditched out and headed to Veronica’s.

********

           “Veronica?” her dad called from his room. Veronica was laying on the couch, one hand over the side scratching Backup’s head.

           “Yeah, dad?”

           “I’m going to head over to the office for a couple hours, try to close out some cases and such. Pick up your car from the station.” Veronica twitched nervously, but Keith didn’t seem to notice. “Will you be okay on your own?”

           Veronica shifted up to a sitting position, wincing slightly. She was, mostly, fine but any time she moved her head reminded her she wasn’t back to one hundred percent. “Yeah, of course. You go keep the Mars office running. I’m fine, really.”

           Her dad had walked out to the living room as she was speaking, and now looked down at her. His eyes were soft, and she could see his concern. “Really, dad. I promise.”

           He nodded. “Alright. Remember, Logan is coming by. I should be back before he gets here, but don’t feel like you have to talk to him if you aren’t up for it. He can wait, until you are comfortable.” Keith gave her a soft smile and turned to go.

            “Hey, before you go,” Veronica called, “where did you put my camera? I know my phone’s a goner, but I was hoping to download those pictures I took yesterday and email them to you. Help you close out that case.”

           “Veronica, you need to rest. I don’t want you working cases. Not now, and not later.”

           “Well either way, I need to know where my camera is. You can take the SD card, if you’re worried.”

           Her dad gave her a hard look, then sighed: “I’ll bring it in from your car, but I don’t want you working on that case. You understand?”

           “Wait, my camera wasn’t in the alley?” Veronica’s voice shook as she flashed back to the events of the previous day. “I didn’t leave it in the car. I took it with me.”      

           Her dad frowned, his brow furrowed. “I wasn’t looking for it, but it definitely wasn’t close. I would’ve seen it.”

           “No,” Veronica groaned, dropping her head to her hands. There goes any evidence I had of who assaulted me. Dad is going to kill me.

           “Don’t worry, Veronica. I can stake out our mark again. And I’ll go check the alley again. Maybe I missed it.”

           Veronica gave her dad a soft smile. “Thanks, dad. Now get out of here. Those desperate housewives won’t wait forever.” Veronica winked and waved him out the door.

“I love you, Veronica.”

“I love you, too. Dad.”

Veronica lay back gently, raising her hands to her head. The medication she had taken earlier had taken the edge off her headache, just enough to ease the nausea, but not enough for her to forget about the pain. Squeezing her eyes shut, she tried to focus on what she remembered of the night before. If her camera was gone, she’d have to identify the men from last night by memory. Not my favorite, but it’ll do. She eased up from the couch and stepped over Backup on her way to her room. Given the extent to which the marks from the previous night had gone to stop her from having evidence of the meeting, Veronica figured the encounter must have been important. Luckily not important enough to kill a witness…. Just confiscate the proof.

She pulled up a new file on her computer, determining the case was going to get a bit more complicated, and therefore require better tracking. She began by detailing all she remembered from the night before: the location, time, and events before her dad had found her. Deputy Sacks had come to the hospital to get a statement, her dad called the police as soon as he found her but didn’t wait for an ambulance and took her straight to the hospital. She had kept her statement purposefully vague, claiming not to remember much of what happened but made sure to emphasize she was sure it had nothing to do with the mark she had been trailing for her father’s case. Veronica hated to lie to her father, though she wasn’t too concerned about her false statement as she could always claim to remember more should the need arise, but she knew her dad would keep her under constant guard if he knew the truth of the evening.

Once she finished detailing the attack, she moved on to provide descriptions of the third man she saw that night. Weevil gave her pictures of the two marks, so there was no need to write up descriptions of them, though she did attach their pictures to her file. But the third man was new, and she probably didn’t have any pictures of him anymore. Veronica was sure her camera was missing because they took it, and she was sure she wasn’t getting it back. That’s going to be impossible to replace. I’ll have to dip into my college fund. With a sigh she began describing the third man the best she could remember. She closed her mind, thinking back: tall, slightly taller than average. Maybe 6 feet, or a little more? Brown, curly hair. Pale, sunken face with shifty eyes. Boney fingers…

Her musings were interrupted by a knock on her door. A glance at the clock told her school wasn’t out yet, which ruled out Wallace. She clenched her jaw, frustrated but resigned, and made her way slowly to the door. Opening it only a crack, she looked at Logan standing on her door step. She took a moment to look him over: one hand kept flitting to the back of his neck, then to the ends of his sleeves, and his eyes were cast down to the ground. But his feet were firmly planted, stable and ridged. Veronica looked back to his face and met his eyes.

“Logan.” She pulled the door open wide enough to lean on the door frame. His eyes darted to the bruise on her jaw and she saw him face harden.

“Um… hey.” He met her eyes again.

She waited for him to continue, but he just stared. “My dad said you were coming by after school…” Veronica let the words hang in the air, partly accusation, partly question. Logan’s lips twitched downward and he dropped his gaze. Shifting his weight back slightly, he reached out and fidgeted with the ends of his sleeves. Veronica groaned inwardly and tried to remember what her dad had told her: Logan helped her, without reason. She did want to know why. Pushing the door open she tried to ease the tensions, if only slightly. “You wanna come in?”

********

           Veronica pushed open the door and invited him in. The tightness in his chest, which had formed as soon as he pulled up to the apartments, lessened ever so slightly.

“Yeah, thanks.”

           Logan took in the cramped surroundings of her apartment as she walked over and lowered herself onto the couch. Her face pinched, and her brow furrowed as she sat, and the tightness in Logan’s chest came back with a vengeance. He needed to look anywhere but her face, anywhere but at that ugly, purpling bruise. Every time he looked at her he remembered her scream, and every time a new wave of fear and rage crashed through him. Turning his back to her, he studied the kitchen and hall. He assumed the bedrooms were down the hallway but given the nature of the rest of the apartment he could guess there wasn’t much to see that way. His lips pulled down again and he was surprised when he felt of pang of sadness at seeing her new home. It was so much less than what she had before.

           “So, do you want to talk or just creepily check out my apartment?” Veronica cut into his thoughts. He turned back around but kept his eyes low. Away from her face.

           “Uh, yeah.” He walked over and sat in the chair next to the couch, eyes on Backup sitting at Veronica’s feet. Reaching down, he let the dog smell his hand and began scratching his head, any excuse not to look up.

           After a few seconds he heard Veronica shifting on the couch. “So…” she said, obviously waiting for Logan to say something. He finally looked up but focused on her eyes, refusing to let his gaze wander.

           “Sorry, I just… I just wanted to see for myself that you are okay.” Her eyes were hard, and her arms were crossed over her chest as she sat back on the couch away from him.

           “I’m fine,” she said shortly. Then she took a deep breath and closed her eyes, as if trying to center herself. She let her arms fall to her sides and rested her hands on her lap. “I’m sorry I called you…”

           Logan choked and balled his hands into fists. What? She’s sorry she called me? Sorry she got help? He wanted to ask, demand she tell him why she would be sorry that he could help her, but Veronica put her hand up and shook her head. His protest died in his throat. She would rather have been out there alone than have called me…

           She continued: “What I mean is, I’m sorry I made you worry. It wasn’t really that big a deal…”

           Logan sprung up from the chair, muscles tense and lips pulled into a sneer. “Not that big a deal?” He could tell he was shouting now, and Veronica had shrunk back away from him. Backup let out a low growl. He flexed his fingers and balled them back into fists but lowered his voice.

           “I heard him, Veronica. And I heard you scream.” He started pacing, and Veronica stayed silent. “And I talked to your dad. I saw your dad, before he found you and this morning. I, god Veronica, I saw his face. Don’t try telling me ‘it wasn’t that big a deal’” His last words came out a growl, one that almost matched Backup’s. He stared at Veronica hard, every muscle in his body tensed for a fight.

           “And what do you care, anyway?” The question was soft, but forceful.

           “Excuse me?”

           “You heard me.” Veronica met his eyes, hers as sharp as ice, arms a barrier crossed between them. “I said what do you care? It’s not like you’ve done anything but try to hurt me this past year. Are you mad someone else got a turn?”

           Logan took an involuntary step back, mind reeling with the implications of what she was saying. “But I never… that was never…”

           “Oh, save it, Logan. I appreciate you getting my dad, but I would’ve been fine if you hadn’t. And if you cared at all, even a little, this past year would never have happened.”

           He was stunned. Sure, he’d been a jackass this past year, he could comp to that. But I never would have wanted this. I never would have wanted her hurting. His mind flashed to some of the more unseemly pranks he’d pulled, or let happen. Sure you didn’t, he scoffed at himself, you wanted her to hurt as much as you do. Just not this way. But he knew he didn’t want her to hurt, not now, not like this, not any way. Not ever again. For what felt like the hundredth time in the last 24 hours, Logan crumpled. He dropped into the chair as his knees gave out and all the strain his muscles were under left. He felt weak and empty.

           “I’m sorry, Veronica,” he whispered. She didn’t respond.

[snowbellewells]

“Beginning Now, It’s Ours”

~~Note:  So, this story was meant to be a request answer for @whimsicallyenchantedrose for my 200 Follower celebration, and it is LONG overdue – embarrassingly so.  She chose the prompt of: “Emma goes into early labor aboard the Jolly Roger while they are sailing one day; set in the future, post-wedding and happy beginning, but everyone has returned to the Enchanted Forest to live.”  I hope you will still enjoy it, Jennifer!  (I certainly had a lot of fun envisioning it! J) And @revanmeetra87 , your requested fic  is still coming, I promise!  The “CS as ballroom dancers” prompt story keeps growing, and I’m having a lot of fun with it, just not a lot of time to write!!~~  @kmomof4  I’ll let you know when it’s posted too.  We’ve been talking about that CS dancers idea for ages, even before I was supposed to be writing it for a request.

 “Beginning Now, It’s Ours”

By: snowbellewells (TutorGirlml on ff.net)

 “There’s no storm we can’t outrun,

We will always find the sun;

Leave the past and all its scars,

A happy beginning now is ours…”

             Gently rolling waves lap softly against the hull of their ship, rocking back and forth on the open water that stretches unbroken as far as her eyes can see, soothing an eight-and-a-half months pregnant Emma Swan-Jones where she stands on the Jolly Roger’s deck, leaning against the ancient wooden sides.  She runs her hands along the smooth grain, lovingly reflecting that she has come to see the old girl as a home, just as the vessel had served for her husband all those countless years he had spent adrift and alone, when she feels Killian’s solid presence behind her.  The warmth that always radiates comfortingly from her pirate presses to her back as he stands behind her, wrapping his arms as far as he can around her rounded stomach, hand and hook resting protectively over their little one and nuzzling his nose into the crook of her neck and shoulder.  “Alright there, Love?” he murmurs, wordlessly urging her to lean back on him, even as he nips at her skin, causing shivers to skitter down her spine.

             Breath hitching, Emma nods, suddenly not trusting her voice to remain steady.  They have been married almost three years now, and she might feel bloated and unattractive at mere weeks from her due date, but neither time nor condition has ever lessened the powerful effect a single touch or one whisper of her husband’s voice has on her.  Killian Jones may be gaining crow’s feet around his eyes when he gives her his incorrigible grin, and there may be the fewest strands of silver-grey mixed in with the dark hair at his temples, but he is still a menace to her composure in both looks and ceaseless charm.  She has never become any more able to resist the desire to “pillage and plunder” than she was from the very beginning.

               Her pirate gazes down at her, smirking as if he knows, but merely dips his head slightly to place a kiss to her brow. “Glad to hear it, Swan,” he murmurs low, pressing her the smallest bit closer yet in his embrace.  “However, I believe I shall have Henry turn her to port now.  We should have our return course set before the light fades.  Enjoy the sunset.  We shouldn’t go too far out again until after our babe joins us.”

               Emma gives him a small nod of reluctant acquiescence, resisting the urge to roll her eyes at his worrying over her and his protective concern for their little one’s health and safety.  At various times earlier in her pregnancy, both her mom and her dad had pulled Emma aside to urge a bit more patience and understanding with her anxious husband.  In their world, the realm and time Killian was from as well her parents had reminded gently, bearing children carried much more risk and could cause several more lingering effects than it did in Emma’s modern experience.  She has tried since then to bear with her pirate and his fussing as best she can, knowing that just as she can’t bear to live without him now, he cannot stand the thought of losing her either.

               He moves away with a gentle squeeze of affection to her hand, vowing in a purr against her skin to return shortly, then sauntering over the enchanted wooden deck, calling out to Henry jovially and asking if his first mate needs help bringing her round.  Emma turns partially to watch the two men in her life – her True Loves – whom she adores more than anything and anyone else in all the world. It makes her heart trip almost giddily to see the proud paternal smile Killian gives Henry when his stepson grins proud and pleased while showing that he has them turned about and right on course back to the castle harbor.

               There had been a few bumps in the road – Killian throwing away Pop Tarts to push mackerel for breakfast, and angry accusations on Henry’s part of trying to take his dad’s place when Killian had put a foot down the first time Henry missed curfew on a date with Violet, came to mind with still-vivid clarity – but watching the two of them together now, a person would never know they hadn’t always been family.  Their rapport is easy, genuine liking and respect for each other clear in their conversation and their jests.  That the man she finally gave her broken heart over to for mending loved her son so fully and completely – as if Henry were his own – as well, was more than Emma had dared hope for once upon a time.

               Since their wedding and the Final Battle against the Black Fairy, not to mention yet one more life-threatening and nearly final separation, there had been a fair number of the denizens of Storybrooke who vehemently desired to return to their home realm if there were any way at all to make it possible.  It seemed safer than staying in a place clearly targeted for mayhem and catastrophe; plus, it was where most of them really belonged.  Her parents had led the charge in fact, once they were certain that Emma, Killian, and Henry would go as well, and that Emma was genuinely alright with the decision.  Henry had been thrilled beyond belief and anxiously impatient to set out for a world where he could be a true knight of his grandparents’ kingdom and have all the adventures and heroics that role would entail.  With Regina working to help instead of thwart them, and a bit of advice and labor from Anton and the dwarves, it was the matter of merely a couple months’ growth time to have enough beans for those who wished to return to the Enchanted Forest, restore Snow White’s benevolent reign as it should always have been, and to rebuild the land they would make their permanent home.

               Emma tilts her head, savoring the warm, blissful feeling in her chest as she watches Killian lean in to speak just a few brief words of suggestion or encouragement to Henry before clapping him on the shoulder and nodding affirmation to whatever she can see Henry saying in response. Henry’s laughter rings out on the sea air brightly, one hand leaving the ship’s wheel to swat at Killian playfully before her pirate swings away and comes back to her, the oranges and golds of the sky behind him lighting his figure as if he is surrounded by a hazy halo.

               Feeling her mouth begin to water with desire for her gorgeous husband, his attractiveness only accentuated by the sunset’s glow, Emma turns back to the ship’s side, leaning for support gently as she rubs her hand over her stretched and unwieldy belly.  The rumbling unease she feels just now is another side effect, like the sudden bouts of overwhelming need for her husband and all he can do with that sinfully delicious body, that she wants to blame on the wealth of hormones coursing through her as she comes to the end of her pregnancy.  Still, her brow furrows against her will as she gazes out at the reddish ball of the fiery sun seeming to settle right on the water at the horizon line before them, unable to ignore the sharp, painful pinch of sudden discomfort in her abdomen, even as she tries to hide it.  Blowing out a puff of air in the hope of breathing deeply to steady herself, Emma leaves her hand on her stomach, rubbing her palm back and forth along its curve, forcing herself to focus elsewhere and stay calm.

               Though Killian would never have said a word, thinking she had no desire to give up the comforts and conveniences of the modern world she had always known, Emma knew her husband had wanted to see his own realm again.  Her brave, resourceful pirate adapted himself so determinedly and well to any surroundings – even the strange and mystifying 21st century with all its gadgets and technology – that she could almost forget what an adjustment her world must have been for him… how much he had willingly given up to remain by her side. Yet as they had settled in her parents’ castle, taking their own wing of apartments but still close to their large, extended family and friends, Killian’s glee at showing her the ropes in his homeland had been evident, his sheer joy at for once not being off-kilter and out of the loop with customs, routines, and endless modern technologies.  He never made her feel stupid or ridiculous, even when he might tease her, but was always right at her side, eager to show, to teach, and to introduce her to this simpler time and place natural to him, whether it was how to cinch her dresses with sewn-in corsets or make coffee in a world without Granny’s, Starbucks or Keurig machines – and for her to see the life she would always have had if things had gone as they should – anxious to help her feel at home and come to love the place as much as he clearly did.

               Thoughts of their current place and time bring her focus circling back to the trepidation her beloved pirate had suffered and dealt with when they first learned they were expecting.  Not that Emma hadn’t harbored her own issues, but once she managed to tell Killian and he had been awestruck and thanking her with kisses rained all over her face before falling to his knees to press his lips to her still-flat stomach repeatedly as well, her biggest worry had been allayed.  This would not be like last time – alone, sick with guilt and regret, knowing that in the end the precious life she carried couldn’t stay with her, and that she would have to give it up.  Killian, after the initial shocked euphoria, had grown fearful over the many things which could still go wrong, the mere chance that he could lose her, the baby, or both of them.  For the last month or so, it had nearly paralyzed him and stolen all of his happiness and anticipation for the event. Several long scouting expeditions with David, which she and her mother felt were more “bro bonding” exercises and an excuse for some in-depth reassuring talks, had finally brought Killian’s confidence in their strength and preparation and his anxious joy to meet the child borne of their love back to the forefront.

               Now, however, as she can’t help bending forward a bit, curling herself around the source of pain and biting back a low moan. Emma has a fleeting moment of panic that perhaps Killian’s fears are not so far off base.  And then, just as though he has read her mind, the way she often believes he can, Killian is there at her side, hand and hook at her waist bracingly to still her wild thoughts.

               “What is it, Love?” he asks apprehensively. “Are you alright?”

               Emma can only shake her head in the negative, doing all she can now not to scream in pain and alarm her teenage son along with her husband.  She clutches at Killian’s hand on her waist with shaking fingers, wrapping his hook in her grip as well and leaning into his support it all it’s worth.  By the time she raises her head for her teary, unfocused green eyes to meet his concerned blue, she feels the unmistakable gush of liquid breaking free and streaming to the planks of the Jolly at their feet.  She can’t deny, even to herself, what is going on, a few weeks ahead of schedule though it may be.

               Killian’s mouth opens in shock, clearly floundering momentarily for words as he looks from her face to their feet and back again before asking rather needlessly, “Emma lass, are you…?”

               She bobs her head rapidly in affirmation, feeling her knees give a bit and leaning into the frame of his body yet more heavily. She tries to force a smile to her lips, even as she feels silent tears breaking free to trek down her cheeks.  “I think –” she breaks off on a gasp, then forces herself to continue speaking breathily with a self-deprecating chuckle at the end, “you may have been a bit late with the warning about going out on the water, Captain. Pretty sure there won’t be any time for worrying about that.”

               Breaking into a pleased grin at the imminent arrival of their long-awaited offspring, Killian’s eyes light up with happy expectation, even though they stay fixed caringly on hers.  “My apologies,” he murmurs lowly against her neck, offering a bit of a mocking bow clearly meant to help her keep the lighthearted mindset as long as she can. “In future, Milady, I shall endeavor to be more prepared.”

               Calling to Henry over his shoulder without even glancing back to the helm, he asks evenly, with impressive show of calm, “How long before we dock, Lad?”

               When Henry’s response is half an hour to forty-five minutes, Emma grits her teeth, knowing this will probably still be going on, but that she will not be up to trekking from the ship to the castle by then. Thinking about the nursery all outfitted, sterilized and prepared for their baby’s delivery, and both Doc and Victor on standby to oversee the proceedings, and yet still out of reach of all of it, is maddening and only serves to cause her tears to fall with greater regularity.

               “Right then,” Killian states, his voice clipped with the tension that always comes when he is forced to see her upset or in pain. He moves swiftly before she can protest to wrap his hook arm around her shoulders and his other arm beneath her knees, sweeping her off her feet into his arms, and already moving toward the hatch that leads below to the Captain’s quarters.  “Steady on your course, Mate,” he calls to Henry.  “Your mum needs to lie down, and I am taking her to do so.”

               Emma gapes at him now, nonplussed until she has to bury her face in his chest to muffle another cry aloud at the most vicious contraction yet.  She wants to fight him, demand he put down her awkward bulk before he falls and hurts them both, but keeping a lid on her anxiety and breathing as she has been taught are taking nearly all of her focus and strength.  Henry is no dunce; he has probably already figured out what’s happening and worrying, she frets, eyes slipping closed for a minute as she simply tries to think straight.  

               Before she knows it, Killian is easing her down on the bunk they have shared every night they’ve ever spent together on his ship, gently brushing back wisps of hair gone sweaty with exertion from her forehead, before pulling back to give her an encouraging smile.  “Don’t worry, Swan.  Henry will be fine.  As will you and our impatient babe.  I will fill him in and be back before you know it.  Just hold on, aye?”

               Emma nods, blinking back more tears at his understanding exactly what she needs – his knowing just what to do, just what to say, what will make a frightening situation alright again for her in only a few words.  It is hard to believe that even a month ago, he was the one beside himself with worry, when now that he sees her in need he seems so steady and calm.  Killian turns and disappears back up the ladder; a moment later, she can hear his quick steps crossing the deck overhead.  There are a few minutes of silence following, and she senses then that he must be telling Henry what’s really going on; that she is already in labor to bring his younger brother or sister into the world.  What surprises her is that she soon feels the ship’s movement stall, coming to a standstill other than the gentlest continued rocking of the waves around them.

               It isn’t long after that she hears two sets of footfalls pound across the boards above her, then the hatch opening to allow both her True Loves down to her; Killian dropping into the small room as agile as a cat while Henry clambers after him, eyes wide as he takes in her panting, aching form on the bed where Killian left her.

               They take up positions, one on either side of her, and Killian kneels to her left, brushing his hook, the cool curve soothing, over her flushed cheek while offering her his good hand and raising the back of her palm to his lips when she takes it and laces their fingers together. “Don’t worry, Love.  Everything will be fine.  We’ve dropped anchor so that the both of us are free to aid you, and all will be right – Whale or no.”

               Emma looks up into those mesmerizing blue eyes, feeling as though she should want to rail at him for getting her into this situation, want to squeeze the hand in hers until she breaks all his knuckles and he hurts as much as she does right now, and demand how he knows it will all work out.  Yet that open gaze of wonder, admiration, and love he has fixed on her makes the only real emotion she can register one of gratitude that Killian is right there at her side with no intention of leaving her.

               Henry rests his hand on her opposite shoulder then, as if just needing to touch and lend his mom what encouragement he can. His hand is strong, slightly calloused, and larger than she remembers it being; her boy is nearly a man, and it suddenly seems as though it has happened right before her eyes.  She leans her head over to rest against his when Henry bows his forehead to meet hers, whispering a soft ‘thank you’ to her beautiful, amazing, and incredible son.  He could begrudge her all of this, what with the mistakes she made and the way his own life had begun; he could have wanted no part of this new family dynamic and a younger sibling that she plans to raise from the very start.  Instead, with true grace and empathy, Henry has welcomed this coming child as a second chance for all of them, just as he has always managed to understand that his mom had only wished him to have his best chance in life with every fiber of her battered young heart, and that was the only reason she had let him go those many years past.

               “You’ve done this before, Mom,” Henry reminds her now, managing to evoke at least a bit of a jesting tone in his delivery. “Plus, you’re pretty much the strongest person I know.  You’ve got this…well, we’ve got this.”

               “Aye, that we do, Darling,” Killian agrees, slipping his arm behind her to tilt her forward, putting several pillows behind her to help prop her up somewhat, as if he somehow knows that she’d realized the time to push is close at hand.

               Quickly, Henry heads to the galley for clean towels and hot water when Killian asks for them.  While her son is gone, her husband helps her shed the outfit she had been wearing for their sailing venture and don instead a simple, lightweight shift, before placing a sheet over her bottom half and bent knees, as he has seen several times by now, both on television in her world and at the various other births they have borne witness to at this point.  By the time Henry returns with the requested items, they have her settled once more and Killian is at her feet, coaxing her to breathe as Whale has had them practice and reminding her when to push as the time is fast approaching.  “I am no Dr. Frankenstein, but I will do the best I can, Love.  It would seem our littlest pirate is no longer willing to wait.”

               Emma huffs a short, nervous laugh between gasps for air and groans as she feels the pressure and stretching within her abdomen only heighten.  “Honestly, Killian, I wouldn’t mind an actual doctor’s expertise, but I think I’d rather have you down there than him, if the truth be told.”

               Henry chooses that moment to break up the exchange before things grow any more awkward, and he comes back to her head, letting her lean against him and supporting her shoulders.  Soon, it all blurs into her two loves’ voices giving instructions and speaking encouragement, measured breaths, blinding pain, and pushing, until she feels she has no more strength left, not a single ounce of energy still within her body to give.  Her surroundings and the passing minutes blend together hazily in increasing agony.

               “Come on, Mom!” Henry urges at her ear, pleasing earnestly as he continues, “One more push!  You’re almost there!”

               Tossing her head back and forth weakly, Emma senses her words more than actually hearing them as she tells him ‘no’, she can’t, it’s too much, there’s nothing left.

               Suddenly, Killian’s voice snaps through the fog, breaking like lightning, a lifeline tossed into murky seas and towing her back to shore.  “Emma! You must!” he demands, his voice, raw and urgent, but implacable, allowing no other choice.  “I can see the crown of the head.  Push, Lass! Now!  Once more!  You can do this!!”

               Calling on every reserve she can muster, clenching muscles she never even realized she had, Emma bears down once more, pushing, straining, until all at once the cord she has felt constricting her breaks, a force expels, and she falls back, drained, to the wailing cry of an infant.

               Giddily, her hurt and exhaustion flip on their head into a dazed sort of euphoria.  Her eyes roll to Henry, who is grinning down at the end of the bunk where Killian is cradling a squalling, red, and flailing newborn as he attempts to clear its airways and wipe clean the delicate, rosy skin.  

               “You did it, Mom!  We made it!” Henry beams back at her, shifting and leaving her side for a moment to help Killian maneuver and settle the child, wrapping it in a spare sheet from a cupboard and settling her in the crook of his stepfather’s blunted arm.

               In just a few more moments, Killian is bringing the swaddled bundle of precious little girl to his wife and laying the crying child in her arms, where the little one promptly stills to mere sniffles, seemingly soothed by her mother’s very touch.  “We’ve a daughter, Swan,” her pirate announces, already entranced and clearly wrapped around the wee infant’s tiny fingers.  His voice is hushed with blissful reverence as he looks on, watching their daughter’s rosebud mouth purse and her eyes blink curiously up at them all, then staring at Emma in wonder, as if hardly daring to believe this has all just happened.

               For a moment in the ship’s cabin, the world slows and allows a frozen tableau of perfect delight.  The gurgling little girl already sporting a head full of her papa’s dark hair, her two enamored, drained, and enthralled parents, plus one proud big brother, all elated at the result of the last few hour’s hurried proceedings.

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~8888888888888888~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

                 When, a month later, the newest heir to the throne of Misthaven and the Enchanted Forest is presented in court, Morgan Ruth Jones shows every bit of her mother’s pluck and her father’s mischievous charm when she reaches up to tug a curl of her grandmother Queen Snow White’s hair as she rests in her arms, grinning toothlessly at the gathered assembly and winning all her future subjects over as easily as blinking her eyes.  From where they stand to the side looking on, Emma threads her arm through Killian’s and gazes up to see that his eyes are suspiciously misty.  Reflecting on how their little miracle child has continued to surprise and delight them every day since that of her birth, is only another confirmation of how very blessed she is, after all the heartache that came before.  If there were ever a fitting exclamation point to signal the conclusion of their story’s start, and lead into the rest of the long-awaited fairy tale, it would be their daughter, without doubt.  Henry himself could not have written a happier beginning.