#“Things get stressful sometimes…and that’s okay!”

[h0lahey]

Two months after the outbreak.

Viktor is a lot more capable than Jayce thinks. His calm demeanor and pragmatic thinking got them out of many stressful life threatening situations. He can also handle him self pretty well in physical encounters. Suspiciously well given his leg.

Viktor is infected. Had been for a few weeks. His bad leg got bit but surprisingly he feels fine. Maybe the virus isn’t as bad as they thought.

He’s even getting better but can’t bring himself to tell Jayce. Not after what happened

Jayce isn’t taking the whole apocalypse thing well. He misses his old life. Family, friends, work, everything. He’s trying not to show it but some days are worse than others.

The only thing that keeps him going is Viktor. The memory of the good times. He is constantly worried about Viktor, tries his best to take care of him. He can sometimes get a little overbearing.

Jayce clings to the idea of them being able to stop all of this and get his life back. They need to get to the checkpoint. They have to.

Okay I have a new obsession.

I want to write a fanfic so bad but my academic career would go up in flames sooo

But maybe one day I’ll break and just say fuck it xd

(I’m really close ngl)

[redbleedingrose]

Can you please write cute fluff headcanons of the acotar men ( whichever you want to write about) pampering their fem s/o with a massage because they see her tense with stress? Please and thank you .

Pleaseeee, the Bat Boys and Vanserra Bro's know how to treat their girls, especially when they are stressy spaghetti!!

I kind of want to split this up into a mini series, so I will do Rhys first. Let me know who y'all want second in the comments!

Rhysand

okay first off, why are you even stressed? This male does his very best to make sure his darling is never worried about anything.

But its okay, sometimes your emotions get the better of you. Not your fault darling, you're just his sweet girl who likes to worry your pretty head about things like how emotionally constipated Az is, or how Cassian is working overtime with his training after throwing out his back (embarrassing for the old ass male), and how Morr is being too secretive these past few months and something is definitely going on with her. Rhys thinks it is so adorable how you worry about the members of the inner circle, how you take care of them in the ways that they need.

He loves watching you pitter patter around the apothecary, trying to gather materials to create a balm for Cass' back. And he can't help but muse over you fussing over Azriel, forcing him into the settee in your office and having yourselves a little therapy session (he knows he will hear the tea about it later when you both go to bed, and he cannot wait). He does moan and groan when you plan for a girls night out with Amren and Morr, he wants to have some alone time with his mate, but you settle into his lap and pepper kisses all over his face and neck putting him into a lovesick daze before rushing off with a promise of what is to come when you arrive home from your night.

Anyway, you do sometimes get overwhelmed, you care so much. You worry about Rhysand, you worry about the inner circle, and more, you worry about Velaris and the entire night court. Being the first high lady of the Night Court has designed a load of pressure on you to be perfect at all times, to always say and do the right thing. And Rhys, well he grew up with that pressure. He knew this was going to happen to him, but he cannot imagine the stress you give yourself. Again, you care so deeply, and that is one of the things that made Rhys fall for you, so much so, he physically aches when you aren't around.

You always try to hide when you feel overwhelmed, too embarrassed and ashamed to admit it. Part of you doesn't want to bother the high lord, knowing he, himself, is incredibly busy putting out fires on a daily basis, and handling it with such grace. It is almost annoying how effortless Rhys rules. But Rhys knows. He knows you, and he knows your heart and soul. You don't have to tell him you are feeling overwhelmed.

He can feel it, he can see it. He notices everything about you. He clocks the crinkle of concern between your eyebrows, the way your hands shake ever so slightly as you read through and sign the most tedious and boring paperwork, the way you twist and turn the custom wedding ring on your finger, the way you shake your right leg as it rests across your other leg and how you pause it when you finally become aware you are doing it, only to start again. You are teeming with anxiety, and he will do everything in his power to get you to relax. He can't have his beautiful wife worried like this, oh no, not at all. You are too good, too pure, too precious to him to ever allow such a thing.

After deciding he has seen enough of his pretty girl worrying, he swoops you up, out of your chair and into his arms, right where you belong, carrying you just like he did on your wedding night, his stunning bride. He ignores your protests with a firm shake of his head, and kissing the side of your head with a small hum, tightening his grip on your squirming thighs and right at the edge of your breast, carrying you out of your office and into your shared bath. Halfway to the bathroom, you gave up your fussing and settled into his hold, wrapping your arms around his neck and burying your head into his warm chest. He sets you down gently onto the counter, and traces his hands up your sides and settling onto your jaw, softly kissing every part of your face he can reach, focusing his attention on your rounded cheeks, pouted lips, fluttering eyes and your temple instead of answering your questions on what you are doing in your bathroom when you each have mountains of paperwork lining your desks that need to be completed before the winter solstice next week. "Darling, I don't mean to hush you, but hush. You, my mesmerizing mate, are too stressed out for your own good. I don't want you to worry about a single thing, and I will take care of it."

You immediately go into full denial mode, rambling with a quivering lip, "I can handle it Rhys, I am High Lady, and this is my duty, and I know what I am doing." Your husbands violet eyes twinkle as they normally do when they are focused in on you, and he listens on as you bubble out excuses and far fetched tales describing how you "really aren't stressed" and have "no idea what he is talking about," all the while rubbing at your tense shoulders and kissing the side of your mouth until he finally hushes you again. "S'alright baby, I know. I know you can handle it and that you know what you are doing. But if I am being honest, sometimes I get overwhelmed. And I just need you, I need you to be close to me. So will you please take this bath with me doll? I will even feed you chocolate covered strawberries and give you a massage with that lavander oil you love so much after."

The pecks to the side of your mouth were enough to convince you to stay with your mate, and follow through on his plans for a relaxing evening, but you didn't need to tell him that. The chocolate covered strawberries and full body massage are just an added bonus. The quirk of your lips is enough for your mate to vanish both your clothes and place you into the warm bath in front of him, holding your back close to his chest. He washes your hair, even letting the conditioner sit in while he presses his fingers into the tight knots in between your shoulder blades. After washing each other off, you both find yourselves snuggling in your bed designed for his large illyrian wings. You lay your head against his corded chest, giving into the deep sleep that calls you as he holds you pressed up against him.

Thank you so much for reading! Please like, comment, and reblog! It mean's the world to me.

Here is more of my work: Masterlist

[gothicfied]

Cho Hyun-ju / Player 120 Headcanons

Pairing: Cho Hyun-ju / Player 120 x Reader

Warnings: Mentions of death/dying, killing, guns/gunshots (typical squid game stuff), other than that it's just fluff, not proof read (english isn't my first language)

જ⁀➴ Watching Hyun-ju during the six-legged pentathlon, you couldn't help but be amazed. She was a leader, a fighter, someone who didn't and wouldn't give up, that much was sure. It was amazing to see her lead her group to victory, to safety, being the one to push them and encourage them. Everyone cheered, obviously including you, and it truly was an amazing feeling to see them all get away with their lives. You weren't so sure if you'd make it, too.

જ⁀➴ Thankfully, you did. Your group barely scraped by and you just decided that you needed to be on Hyun-ju's team. Hesitantly, you approached Geum-ja, who immediately noticed your small figure and agreed in a heart beat to let you join their little group.

"You were great back there, you know?" You told Hyun-ju with a shy smile while she was sitting on the stairs, originally just observing Yong-sik getting scolded by his mother again. "Hm? Ah.. that was nothing." she replied back, shaking her head when smiling up at you. "I think everyone in here should be like you," you chuckled, "like, actually. We'd all benefit from it."

જ⁀➴ Hyun-ju's heart melted at all the nice words you would say to her, complimenting her braveness and strength. It made her feel more validated in her actions, which was the motivation she really needed in a place like this. Young-mi was equally excited to have you in their group now, having animated conversations with you about the things you had in common — And if she approved of you, Hyun-ju would, too.

જ⁀➴ Whenever you were scared, were having doubts about yourself or just needed someone to talk, Hyun-ju was there. It was almost like she felt it when you felt that way and she'd always listen to you and comfort you. Her hugs were warm and firm, perfectly calming you down after a particularly bad nightmare. In return, you also encouraged her to talk to you if she ever felt the need to, but everytime you suggested that she'd laugh it off. To Hyun-ju, it was enough to know that she brought you comfort, she didn't need anything in return. She did think it was adorable for you to say that.

જ⁀➴ To distract you from all the stress sometimes, she'd ask you about your plans for the future, about your hobbies and jusy about the things that made you, you. Hyun-ju was genuinely interested in getting to know you and was growing very fond of you over a short period of time.

જ⁀➴ After suffering through the third game together, and also a painful loss (rip Young-mi, my queen), everyone was going through it. Instead of everyone keeping it peaceful, they just decided to slaughter each other after lights out. Ever since losing Young-mi, Hyun-ju was very adamant on keeping you by her side at all times. She wouldn't make that mistake again and leave someone she cared about out of her sight.

The lights flicker like crazy above you, screams and the disgusting sound of people getting killed right next to you were the only things you could focus on right now. You were panicking, you were scared, you felt like you were going to cry and throw up. Hyun-ju had grabbed you by your hand and dragged you to the last corner of the dorm area, hiding you between some mattresses other players had set up. She was firmly holding you by your shoulders and telling you something you couldn't make up. Probably that everything will be okay or something. "Hey! Hey, please listen to me," Hyun-ju leaned in close, hugging you against her, "it's all going to be fine. We'll be okay."

જ⁀➴ In fact, you were. Obviously you were. Hyun-ju wouldn't say something she didn't mean — she wouldn't lie to you. She knew that winning someones trust was hard and the fact that you put so much of it into her filled her with pride.

જ⁀➴ Gi-hun had his mind set on a revolution. Anybody who could handle a firearm was supposed to step forward and take one of of the ones they took off the dead guards. You swallowed, locking eyes with Hyun-ju. She'd step forward, they needed her. You gave her a quick nod and a faint smile and she returned it, quickly stepping forward to help the others.

Geum-ja put a hand on your shoulder, claiming that she'll be fine and that she's far too tough to die out there. "They'll be back to get us out of here, don't worry about it." she said, tugging you by your sleeve, beckoning you to come with her.

When Dae-ho stormed in after a while again, hastily collecting the magazines out of the guards pockets, you were relieved, even if he seemed extremely beside himself. He had some sort of panic attack, so you sat him down on one of the beds, trying to reason with him, until Hyun-ju stormed in, making your facs light up. Oh my god, she's alive. She basically ran to Dae-ho, urging for the ammunition and kept asking him what happened.. so, this wasn't going according to plan at all. You assumption was confirmed by all the masked guards that flooded into the dorm area, holding the remaining players at gunpoint.

"Hyun-ju..?" your voice was shaky. Her eyes fell down on you, taking your hand into hers. "It's all going to be fine."

[that-hazbin]

Sorta AU/story idea where Alastor's a serial killer but he doesn't... completely realize that he's a serial killer.

He's super mentally Not Okay with a whole load of traumatic baggage, and sometimes when he gets past a stress threshold, he sort of... blacks out. Not faint, exactly, but his body moves on autopilot while his consciousness is just. Not there.

The first time it happened, he was fourteen. His father had beaten him black and blue, and left him limp on the floor to go beat Alastor's mother. When Alastor came to the realization that his mother stopped moving, his vision went blurry.

When he regained consciousness, his father was on the floor, bleeding from the head, eyes glazed over. It looked like he fell and hit himself on the corner of the dining table. Alastor lost both his parents on the same day.

After that, Alastor started having "episodes" a bit more often. A majority of the time, he manages to get home, and when he wakes up, he's hiding under his bed or in his closet, confused as to how he even got home. He doesn't want to be admitted into an asylum, of course, so he keeps quiet about this.

Sometimes, though?

Sometimes, he'll wake up knee deep in water, staring into the dark of a bayou. Sometimes, he'll wake up half-submerged in his bath, red going down the drain, with no clue as to where he's injured. Sometimes, the person who was screaming at him before the episode hit just went... missing the next day.

Alastor keeps quiet.

Naturally, when Alastor dies, he goes to hell. He doesn't remember the crimes, but he did commit them regardless. Of course, when people ask him what he did to end up down there, he can't give a real answer. The truth of the matter is that he doesn't know. Sure, he has... suspicions. Theories. But he doesn't know.

Things happen. He has several black out episodes in Hell before they simply stop happening, because he's stressed all the time and he can't just block every single second of every day from memory. He learns how to consciously survive in hell. Makes a name for himself.

Things roughly stay truthful to canon from there.

Then, one day, Charlie has a brilliant idea for a hotel activity. Part of redemption means acknowledging what brought you to hell to begin with, and what you can do now to make up for those actions! They go around the room, talking about the sins they committed, and what they can do now to improve. Alastor fully intends to stay out of the activity, he's not working towards redemption after all, but... Of course, Lucifer has to taunt.

Lucifer: What, you're just gonna sit around judging us?

Charlie: Er, dad—

Alastor: Hilarious coming from you, your majesty, truly. In any case, your memory seems to be failing you, I'm not here for redemption. I have no reason to participate.

Lucifer: Uh huh, neither is the bartender or the maid, you think you can be exempt just because you're staff? I'm the King of Hell and you don't see me skipping out. And here I would've thought you would have taken the chance to brag about the fucked up shit you did up there.

Charlie: Hey, guys, I don't think—

Alastor: Husk and Nifty are grown adults who are perfectly capable of making their own decisions. I am also a grown adult, and my decisions don't need to reflect theirs.

Lucifer: Oh, I see, you're a coward then?

Alastor: Believe whatever you want to, it makes no difference to me.

Lucifer: Sure it doesn't. Why don't we make this a game, huh? I'll guess your sins, and you stop me when I get it right.

Charlie: Dad, Alastor—

Lucifer: Can't imagine you fucked before marriage or anything, I mean, you scream prude. Bet you died a virgin.

Alastor: Hah, I wouldn't know. Are you done with your childish taunts, or are you going to allow your daughter to continue?

Lucifer stops dead, both because of the reminder that he's interrupting Charlie's activity, and also because he's replaying Alastor sentence back in his head. And, as the father of lies himself, he realizes that Alastor... wasn't lying when he said he didn't know.

Charlie: Great, yes, thank you Alastor! So, anyways—

Lucifer: Wait.

Charlie: Dad!

Lucifer: Seriously, wait. Bellhop, what the fuck do you mean you wouldn't know?

Angel: ... Oh shit.

Alastor: ... Charlie, continue your activity.

Charlie: Uh.

Lucifer: Oh, FUCK YOU! No, what the fuck did you mean by that?! What, were you like, drugged or—

Angel: HEY LET'S TALK ABOUT MY DEEP DARK PAST AS A MEMBER OF A MAFIA FAMILY!

Charlie: YES THANK YOU ANGEL LET'S TALK ABOUT IT! I'M VERY PROUD OF YOU FOR VOLUNTEERING!

Alastor gets the fuck out of dodge, and Lucifer finally gets the hint that he definitely stepped on a landmine that he very much should have not touched. Unfortunately, Lucifer alongside everyone in the hotel are left with a misunderstanding regarding Alastor's history.

[thanosscross]

Fanboy - Choi Seung Hyun/T.O.P x reader Part 2

Summary: After wrapping up filming for squid game, you realize, you aren't ready to leave yet, or at least, you weren't ready to leave Seung Hyun yet

Warnings: haha you thought the last one was sad? Buckle up my lovelies

You and your co-star had started a pattern, every night you'd alternate between hanging out on set, or hanging out at different clubs after filming wrapped, sometimes with other co-stars sometimes it was just Seung Hyun and you. It wasn't a problem until things started getting weird, after an accidental one night stand together neither of you decided to stop the pattern, the only difference was, the gazes, the touches, holds, had a lot more longing behind them.

Smiling as you walked onto set Seung Hyun was standing at the doors smiling "Happy death to you!" He cheered, you frowned smacking his chest "It's not a fun day, you ass!" You protested "My tv lover is killing me and I have to leave my best friend!" You whined holding his hands tightly as you stood on your tip toes to touch your nose with his, you needed to stress how serious this was. Jae-Won (Player 124) smirked from a distance standing next to Yu-ri "Are they together yet?" He asked watching the two of you in confusion "No..but if they do get together, people will lose it" She smiled, clapping her hands together happily, Seung Hyun smiled looking at you, his cheeks turning a soft pink from how close you were to him, reminding him of the one night spent on top of you, having your faces the same distance as you both came together.

"Action!" Your director called, you stood on your mark, taking Seung Hyun's advice on your character's emotions and started to think of the fact that you were leaving, and the routine you had grown so comfortable and used to with Seung Hyun was coming to end just as fast as it started. Tears starting to spill from your eyes as you let out a soft sob "I-I'm sorry" You whimpered, Seung Hyun froze, forgetting his lines for a moment as his heart broke, seeing the true and genuine sadness wash across your face "I told you I'd fucking kill you" He growled, trying his best to keep his glare on you harsh as the camera now held both of you in frame "T-Thanos please! I-I don't want to go not yet please!" You begged, going slightly off script before giving Seung Hyun his cue, you both acted out him stabbing your side repeatedly, the blood pack taped to your side starting to soak fake blood through your shirt as you grabbed Seung Hyun's hand "P-Please" You begged, He just threw your hand down storming out of the bathroom set, leaving the sound stage entirely before covering his ears knowing what was coming from his script.

"Su-Bong! P-Please! I don't want to die! I-I want to stay with you! Please don't leave me!" You cried, holding your side as you slowly letting your hand fall into your lap before letting your head fall to rest on your shoulder "Cut!" The director shouted, Nobody moved as your stayed where you were, your knees coming to your chest as you sobbed, your quickly hid your face in your hands "Y/n! That was beautiful!" your director shouted before taking notice to your state, Seung Hyun approached the set, taking notice to your sobs he rushed over, wrapping his arms around you gently "Are you okay, sweetheart?" he asked softly, you just wrapped your arms around him "I-I'm serious! I don't want to leave you yet, Seung Hyun" You sobbed, he had to fight back his own tears as he held you close to him "hey, You're not leaving yet" He whispered trying to comfort you, you just continued to cry in his arms, your other co-stars you had gotten close with had approached, trying to comfort you as well.

After a moment, Seung Hyun finally managed to get you back to your trailer and slightly calmed down. He laid reclined back on the couch with your head on his chest, your body pressed close against his as he ran his fingers through your hair, you had fallen asleep not long ago, but Seung Hyun was stuck thinking about everything with you. Pulling out his phone he called the one person he knew would help him with his issue, Ji-Yong. "Helloooo" He sang happily into the phone "Hey...You're the one coming to get Y/n right?" He asked quietly into the phone "Yes sir, as her fake boyfriend it's my job" He said proudly into the phone, Seung just rolled his eyes, why a fake boyfriend whenever Seung Hyun could just be your real boyfriend. "She's um...listen man I'm just going to be honest about everything. Her and I got drunk the other night..and ended up..together..if you know what I mean, well...after that..I started thinking about y/n differently..and she broke down after wrapping up her final scene begging not to leave yet...do you think..there's something there?" Seung Hyun asked nervously, Ji-Yong sighed, torn, he had promised to keep your words about Seung Hyun a secret from him, but here he was basically saying he felt the same, but he knew his friend wouldn't make a move until he had a for sure sign. "You didn't hear it from me..but she's calling one of us every night asking about you, what you like, how you were when you were in her spot" He explained, trying to step carefully so he wasn't betraying your trust "So...You think there's something there?" Seung hyun asked before hearing his old friend groan "Man...I promised her I wouldn't say anything!" He shouted, Seung Hyun grunted in frustration "If you think it's possible just say...she's pretty" He said, trying to get any type of answer from Ji-yong "Then she's Very Very Pretty" Ji-Yong smirked, knowing he just set the ball in motion for you both "I just...She's amazing..her voice is so calming and her eyes are always sparkling like the stars, she's more eye catching and beautiful than any piece of art I've ever seen" Seung Hyun whispered into the phone, not realizing you had woken up, watching as he spoke to your friend "So..You guys won't be upset..If I talk to her?" he asked hopeful, not wanting to make anybody upset "Man, I'm happy to see you both happy, you're both family, and seeing you happy together is even better" Ji-Yong explained, after saying his goodbyes, Seung Hyun ended his phone call, glancing down at you, meeting your gaze made his cheeks heat up in an intense blush, of course you were awake, you had probably heard everything as well.

You were quiet, just scanning over your best friends face, Seung Hyun could feel his nerves jump whenever you still hadn't said something "So...Are you going to talk to me?" You asked, you weren't cutting him any slack, if he wanted to ask you out, he had to put the work in, even though he was already there basically. "Well I mean..how much did you hear?" He asked sheepishly glancing away, feeling anxious under your gaze now, only now coming to the realization he had one of South Korea's K-pop sweethearts pressed against him, looking at him like he hung the moon and stars all for her, how the hell did he get here? "That the Top of K-pop thinks I'm pretty and more eye catching than any of the art he's seen" You blushed teasing him with his words "And it's true, the last handful of years I've dealt with a lot, and I've felt like I don't deserve anything..But when you're around I feel...normal?" He questioned "I don't know, I just know..I don't want the other night to be a one time thing...but I don't want us to be just sex after clubs" He added on, your heart skipped a beat, realizing you were living out almost every K-pop fan's dream, T.O.P, THE Seung Hyun was laying next to you admitting his feelings for you. You just smiled at him softly, pressing your lips to his softly, it wasn't like the multiple times before, like the other night, or whenever you were both dancing on the dance floor. The kiss this time was soft, filled more with love than want, Seung Hyun's hand gently cupped your cheeks as he pulled away slowly.

"I'm going to miss you" You whispered, you had spent the entire night talking with Seung Hyun, preparing yourself to leave him here while you went back to your hometown. "You'll see me soon..I promise" He reassured as he walked you towards the gate of the airport where Ji-Yong was supposed to meet you to fly back with you "I don't want to leave though" you whimpered, feeling your eyes gloss over with tears "My love..I swear, on the moon and stars, I will be with you again, so as the sun rises and sets, watch it with joy knowing I'm somewhere watching the same, thinking of how it resembles your beautiful eyes as the morning sunrise and sunset hits them, waiting until I can see you again" he whispered pressing his lips to your forehead gently "Seung Hyun! Could you stop making moves on my girl so I can get her home?" Ji-Yong shouted excitedly, rushing over to pull you both into a hug "Oh look at you two! K-pops power couple!" He cheered, you just held onto Seung Hyun tighter, trying to fight back your tears as you said your final goodbye. As you walked away you bit your knuckles, Ji-Yong taking your carryon and free hand giving it a comforting squeeze as he looked back, his heart breaking for his two best friends as he saw Seung Hyun squatted down where he stood, trying to conceal his own tears and sobs as the woman who somehow changed his life in the span of a few weeks walked onto a plane, not knowing when he'd be able to see you again.

As you sat in your seat you tried to compose yourself, but it was difficult whenever you knew somewhere Seung Hyun was inside of the airport, needing a hug and comfort, Ji-yong held your hand tightly, hating to see how broken you were over this, you weren't ever sad, even on your emotional songs and verses, you still somehow sounded bubbly, so seeing you so lost and broken hurt him in ways he didn't think was possible.

Whenever you got back home you weren't any better, immediately rushing to your room and hiding under your mountains of blankets, not wanting anybody to talk to you unless it was Seung Hyun.

--

I bet you cried didn't you? Or at least wanted to, I bet you also wanna kill me for leaving the second part here huh?

-

Taglist!!

@ag022123

@acehasmyheart

@heartz4rubyy

@onyxmango

[sl-newsie]

American Woman (Thomas Shelby x American OC) Ch. 59: Look Inside

Masterlist: https://www.tumblr.com/sl-newsie/739551758747090944/american-woman-thomas-shelby-x-american-oc?source=share

The journey home is a quiet and steady one. The further we sail from England the lighter the weight on my heart becomes. Liam helps to district me with card games. By the time we reach America the sight of New York harbor fills my tired soul with joy. Never did I think I’d be so glad to come home. 

Over the next few months things fall back into place. Moeder, vader, and oma were relieved when I told them I’ll be working in America. Polly, Finn, and Ada keep in touch with letters. Polly writes that Thomas never visits. Lizzie’s frantically trying to talk to him but he doesn’t want to. Arthur and Linda have built a life for themselves. Finn keeps to himself. Their kind words offer comfort but nothing can patch up what’s already happened.

Bonnie also keeps his promise. A letter arrives every week, talking all about his adventures with his father and the Peaky Blinders. In return I write him letters about the different customers I encounter. Sometimes I meet with people in vader’s pub. Other times I give them the courtesy of meeting in their own settlements. But Bonnie always ignores talk of business and always asks to make sure I’m doing okay. I write that I am… I think.

“Verena! Dochter! Please come help me with these crates!”

“Coming, moeder!” I call from my room.

“Auntie! Tante!” Eoin’s youngest daughter Cecilia giggles. “Will you play with me?” 

Since I came back it’s been my job to help entertain Eoin’s kids. It’s a perfect way to let my heart heal, even though I do admit that I wish I was taking care of Charlie again. I wonder how Lizzie’s doing with her pregnancy- 

“Verena! Phone for you!” Oma’s voice echos from downstairs. “Someone named Arthur?”

Oh thank God. If it was Thomas I would completely ignore this. My sweet oma smiles at me as I pitter-patter down the stairs, unaware of my anxious thoughts. What on Earth would Arthur be calling about? If there’s something wrong over there shouldn’t they call Ada in Boston?

“Hello?” I ask uneasily into the phone.

“Hello? Verena? It’s Arthur.”

“Greetings, Arthur. Is there something wrong?”

On the other end I hear him chuckle. “You could say that. Verena, get over here before Tommy kills himself. I’m getting him back to work but he needs you here too.”

He wants me to… What?

Arthur listens to my dead silence and keeps talking. “Please? He’s turned into a fucking Communist!”

Turned into one, or fucking one? First Grace, then the Russian, then Lizzie. Now a Commie? I guess two children aren’t enough. Retirement isn’t possible for Thomas Shelby. He’s moved on this long without me, even after I confessed. What can I go back to now? It's time that I take a look at myself and stop trying so hard.

“I’m sorry, Arthur. But there’s no way I can sail over right now. Give my best to Linda. Tot ziens.”

I hang up before he can answer. Before my healing wounds are ripped open again. In these last years of my young life I feel that I’ve learned the toughest lesson. Being mature, being too aware, comes at a cost. In the spam of your life you think too far ahead. Think about how to fix things you can’t control. Re-evaluate what could have been or what could be. Stress about doing your best to please anyone but yourself. 

And Thomas Shelby will be the key stressor for the rest of my life.

General POV

He was fucked.

Thomas has really backed himself into a ditch now. He just couldn’t help himself.

Yes, he had fucked Lizzie. But he was not thinking of May as she had assumed.

Verena.

The only woman he’s ever tried to abstain from. It takes every fiber of willpower not to claim her heart. To pull her close and kiss her gentle lips.

Maybe he was addicted to sex, maybe he was just trying to feel some form of happiness. But one thing is certain. Verena satisfies everything in him.

When Thomas had first set eyes on her, the short, bright-eyed woman standing in the kitchen, he thought for sure she would be like any other broad. Annoyingly chatty, clingy, and skittery. Lord, was he wrong. 

First Thomas thought he was only confused. Verena never used him for money like other women. Grace played his heart like a fiddle so he assumed his tenderness towards Verena’s gentle Christian spirit was the product of friendship. But once he was married… A part of him still felt empty. 

That time at Arrow House, before she was called away at a time of poor inconvenience, he was so close. So close to asking her. He was torn on the matter. Should an innocent woman like her ever settle for a life with him? After all, he’d been so distrustful at the beginning of her employment. 

But then she was pulled away. Time ate off his hope and he drowned himself with the empty love of whores. When Verena finally came back, Thomas assumed she’d forgotten about him. But no. She is here, still vibrant and caring as before. Charlie couldn’t have been more happy to see her and Thomas secretly shared his son’s joy to see the American woman return. When she caught him in the bath Thomas thought the reaction on her face was the most sexy yet adorable thing he’s ever seen. But aside from looks, Verena still has a certain aura about her. Disciplined yet kind. One that reminds him of his mother. 

But he still hesitated. She really deserves so much better… Hell, Verena was almost caught in a vendetta because of him. She deserves a man far more better. Not someone as fucked up as he is. And then when Thomas saw Bonnie Gold being sweet on her he knew he could never truly forget the grip she has on his heart. If only she knew…

So instead he went back to Lizzie. He dug himself further into a pit of guilt, mending his pride by trying to forget. But the entire time Thomas could only think about how much he wished it was Verena. When Lizzie told him her joyful news, Thomas wanted to die of shame.

That look. That look on Verena’s face…

When he told her.

A look of pain and despair that felt like a slap to the face. It was all his fault. And yet she still held back. Maybe Verena doesn’t really love him as he’d hoped? Verena distributes her kindness to everyone. An angel amongst gangsters. Maybe he mistook her gestures to be exclusively for him?

But Thomas can’t go back now. Even if Verena held any love for him she certainly won’t now. Thomas will have to bite the bullet and let her go. He was selfish to think a sinful man like him could ever be blessed to have an innocent woman like her. In truth, Verena never owed anything to the Shelbys. Thomas owes her the best he can offer, which is a life without him. Perhaps her absence will help to hide the pain from his cold heart.

After all these years Verena still carries a smile for him… Even if it’s forced. There’s no other way for Thomas to describe his situation.

He is completely fucked.

@meadows5

[the-stranger-of-the-hidden-world]

"Dragons who eat other dragons. It's not very common, but there are some kinds that do. The lightning breathers are one of them." Stranger elaborated, reaching out to put a hand on Lyra's shoulder. "It scares us, too...but it's just a fact of life. Bigger creatures need more food to survive. And sometimes...that food is smaller and more vulnerable dragons like us. All we need to do is avoid getting eaten and we're okay."

When Lyra sat down on the ground and explained herself, Stranger and Sunchaser both listened intently while Seabreak and Streak continued to wrestle each other. Maybe it was the stress and worry, or maybe they just needed a moment to relax and play, but they didn't seem too concerned, anymore.

The woman watched curiously with rapt attention as the fae woman made a flower bloom before her eyes, trilling excitedly at the sight of it. So, magic was just this...miraculous ability she had. No wonder humans tried to attack her and use her. That kind of power would be terrifying to those who didn't understand it...or alluring to those who wanted to use it for themselves.

It was sad that Lyra was outcasted for not being fullblooded...'dirty blood.' What a horrible concept. "To be fair, if I tried to learn your language, I don't think I'd sound that different than you do right now. Nothing wrong with learning something new." Stranger replied, sitting next to Lyra and admiring the slowly dwindling dusk as the stars began to dot the sky above them, Sunchaser yawning and laying down beside them, letting them lean against him for comfort if they needed to. It was a relief to see that Lyra was healing quickly, thanks to her magic. They were glad to help her...helpless prey was not very sporting and dragons with less regard for that sort of thing wouldn't hesitate to snap up the fae for a meal.

They knew what it was like to feel vulnerable. Their soft scales, smaller bodies, and stark white scales made them easier targets.

Stranger sighed softly through her nose, leaning against her brother as she looked up at the night sky. "Our old alpha - a really cranky dragon named Slate - she...well, she didn't exactly want me when our mother first took me home." She explained, reminiscing on her early days in the Hidden World. Those memories were a bit hazy, but what she did remember was as clear as day to her. "I...I was on a ship. I was little. I couldn't have been more than maybe a few years old. I remember the ship being destroyed...I remember floating away from the wreckage, crying out for my mother. I remember drifting away and ending up on the very edge of the Mothermouth and crying out because I was so scared...and then our mother - Moondance - found me. And...instead of eating me, she scooped me up and took me home and put me in her nest. Our father - Cloud - was a bit worried about raising me, but our mother insisted that I stay. When Slate found out...she was angry. She demanded that mother take me back and leave me to die, but...she refused. She even fought Slate to keep me and...well, I slept next to my brothers that night when they hatched. And we've all been together ever since - even despite all the trouble we've gotten into."

Sunchaser huffed, ear flapping as he listened to his sister tell Lyra how she wound up in their little family. "The stampede with those big shiny armoured dragons was as much Seabreak's fault as it was yours. Mom keeps telling you not to take the fall for him and you still keep doing it."

Stranger huffed, lightly smacking the yellow white dragon with the back of her hand. "I didn't want him to get in trouble with Slate...and it's easier for her to blame me than it is to blame him. Even if I didn't, she would've still blamed me...why bother arguing with her?"

Grumbling, the elder dragon curled around the both of them, resting his tail lightly on Lyra's lap. He wasn't sure how long she had been on that beach, but she must've been rather cold. "At least Mirage isn't as cranky. The most she does is give us the occasional scolding from time to time."

Chuckling, she trilled softly at him. "Hard to think she's so serious, now...I remember when she used to play tricks on us when we were younger just because she liked making us look undignified compared to her." Glancing over at Lyra, Stranger hummed thoughtfully. Lyra was alone, now. She wasn't sure how fae family and social structures functioned, but she couldn't help but empathize with the feeling of not belonging...well, anywhere, really. "I guess you're a stranger among your own, too."

Lyra yelped as Seabreak tumbled into Streak. But once she realized they were playing she giggled. Watching them happily. Though her smile turned worried as she listened to Stranger explain their world.

It sounded like they left of their own will. It also sounded like it was dangerous for them.

“Dragon eaters?!” She looked at Stranger scared. What would eat dragons?! What was dangerous enough to do that?

Lyra found a soft spot on the grass and laid down on her good side. Curling up and watching the brothers play. Lyra knew the questions would come and when her new friend asked the fae gave her a small smile.

“Fae connect to elements. Like fire, water, earth. I am forest fae. I connect to plants.” Lyra reached out and placed her hand on the grass. Slowly lifting her hand to reveal a purple lily flower growing and then blooming before their eyes.

“I help grow. I also help heal. Myself and others.” Lyra pointed to her arm where the gashes were almost completely healed. Laying there felt so nice. Lyra felt her magic returning and the pain of the day was fading away. She closed her eyes as she continued to speak.

“Magic how I speak with you. It give me knowledge to speak dragon. But I still learning. Speak like hatchling.” She giggled.

“But I only half fae. I half human too. Faes don’t like. Call me dirty blood. So forced to leave. I lived alone. Travel a lot to find new home.”

[shiftingwithmars]

Remus accidentally lashing out when things get too stressful and immediately feeling horrible about it

James trying to comfort him and remind him that it’s okay and that anger is a normal human emotion

[soulmvtes]

been feeling so overwhelmed the past few months and it feels neverending

[icewindandboringhorror]

"We can get through this by working together, reach out to your friends, community is all we have, a social network will be your security in the world, now is the time to lean on others!"

I do agree, and it's scientifically sound (pretty sure there is data about how people with better social networks live longer and etc) but also....augh..... what about the severe social issues, difficulty to leave the house, physical issues which lead to like zero socialization energy a majority of the time, etc. etc. Social support can be a replacement for structural support, but.. I guess I just wish it didn't have to be. Community is extremely difficult to build, even moreso if you're someone who has issues with social cues or group conversations or even just being around others in the first place. And blah, nuance, of course I'm just complaining or maybe being too negative or maybe misunderstanding, but, I hardly have the energy to brush my hair once every 2 months.. how am I supposed to maintain a wide social network and be active in a Community and Join Groups lol... sometimes it kind of feels like "er.. well if thats my only option then...... ruh roh". It's overwhelming

[justskulkingaround]

I think I like how the hands turned out cuz of how expressive they look I think

I can always use more practice with poses and motion :))

[blujayonthewing]

I've realized that the problem with fursonas is that trying to engage with the concept feels exactly the same as when I was a little kid trying to have an imaginary friend; it sounds like fun, it looks like the other kids are enjoying it, it lowkey feels like something I, personally, should have, but whenever I try it just feels forced and fake and like I don't know how to do it, or that I'm doing it Wrong

[skitskatdacat63]

Notes:

I think I definitely like the original versions more than the edited ones. I'm more happy with the grumpy Fernando one, whereas the bratty Seb one made me want to cease painting forever. So hopefully he looks good?????? I'm sure I'll soften on it, but yeah, not TOO pleased with it right now. His facial expressions are so cute and dynamic and unique until you have to try and paint it and then you dont love him anymore(kidding ofc, how could I ever hate my beloved boy king 🥺)

Anyways, these are them:

[emmavakarian-theirin]

god the amount of art i would pump out if i stopped letting lineart talk me out of it i would be unstoppable

[misspermitted]

“Look for the strengths in yourself” this. “Your trauma doesn’t define you or make you inherently wrong” that. Do it out of spite. Value yourself out of spite.

What? Those douchebags told you that you weren’t worth anything? Fuck them! Treat yourself like you’re worth something! Get back at those fuckers!

Those assholes conditioned you into thinking you were terrible by treating you like shit? Condition yourself back! Keep valuing yourself and doing self care over and over until you drown them out. Until they’re as stupid and small in your brain as they are in real life.

Fucking win the emotional manipulation game! Win it! Draw something shit because it makes you feel happy! What, you can’t say no to people because you’re not worth as much as them? Fuck that! Say no all the time! Treat yourself like the most important person in the universe because they would hate it!

[exopelagic]

WHY DID NOBODY TELL ME BURROWS END WASNT FREE