#— & egojock.

[carminekings]

— ❛ i realize you can change the people, change the scenery, but you can’t change your own rotten self. ❜ @egojock

nate's come round enough that joe's gotten good at picking out the sincere comments from the full of shit ones. sometimes he likes to be ridiculous for the sake of it — moan over an itch he'll forget the following hour — but on occasion, once in a sensitive blue moon, he will mean every word. his heart will pour out of his chest like pungent gasoline, and nate will hate the admission more than anyone else privy to it. this time, joe's senses suggest this particular confession one of the latter. (the truth is in the details: the discomfort, the impatience, and the self-flagellation.) he's learned to adapt to both extremes, and it's highly convenient then that his cheeks hollow around a joint. he sucks it red, and with a shuddering sigh, holds the rest of it out for nate to pinch. "...c'mon now." there is no rolling set of eyes, no scoff nor condescending sigh — only a quiet look and an impending high. the words aren't alien anyway, they echo with unbearable reason. joe elbows him once more. "dunno. yer a'right sometimes."

[cemeterysgirl]

ㅤㅤit was late out, with the bright moon illuminating her fresh bruises whilst the cold night air nipped at them. an unwanted reminder of her existence. as if she needed one. but the pain helped to remind her that she was, in fact, alive. whether she wanted to be or not. she was stood on the balcony that overlooked the motels parking lot, her figure being arrhythmically lit up by the flickering light overhead as she bent over the railing a tad — half-lit cigarette dangling between coffin-shaped nails before she puffed it back to life.

ㅤㅤtight fitting skirt was hiked up enough to expose the still red cheeks of her plump ass, matching scars scattering the back of her thighs as she bent over the bannister when she spotted a familiar, and handsome, face. " hey, " smoke spilt from matte black lips as she spoke, whistling to get his attention regardless of the time. " cigarette boy. " or at least that's how she remembered him. a conversation and a smoke. she was terrible at names. " you feel like sharing tonight? i'm down to my last smoke. " a veiled way of asking for company. sometimes it was just nice to be with someone that wasn't paying.

closed starter for @egojock.

[notcruel]

@egojock “Try to keep quiet…we wouldn’t want to get caught.”

It was one thing to tell her what to do in bed, but it was another to tell her to gauge her actual bliss. Sure they shouldn't have been having sex in his house. Things had changed so drastically that the fact that she was even in his bedroom was something that was frowned upon by everyone she knew. Then again, what did they know about how much they both cared about one another? "Make me." Her words challenging as she pulled him into her even more. A low groan escaping her as she smiled and moved her hips. "So what if we get caught?" Her body continuing to move as she guided him deeper. "Do you want us to stop?" Teasing she sunk down onto him completely taking him in as deep as she could. Her small frame taking as much painful pleasure as she could. "Tell me you love me."

[awalkoflife]

continued from (x) with nate / @egojock.

she's never been good. she's never even come close. something tells the witch that he doesn't mind though, not when she's wrapped up in his sheets. she's left her marks all over him; in his car, his shower, his locker room, his bed. winnie welcomes the enthusiasm, especially when it's met and matched with the same level of unfiltered desire. "what would that entail, exactly?" the redhead asks, curious now. they were used to playing games with each other, but the role of a good girl was far too foreign a concept. if she were to pull it off for him, she'd need some guidance, perhaps a few ground rules. what would she get in return? the thought makes her brain tick over, a devilish smirk sent his way when he smooths his palm across her face. her cheek leans in to his touch, resting her weight against his momentarily, green eyes meeting his gaze.

his kiss leaves his taste fresh on her tongue, her own fingertips rising to brush against his jaw. "don't you have a big game tomorrow?" she already knows that he does. their entire campus had been transformed into a shrine for the football team. "wouldn't a good girl convince you to preserve your energy?" winnie's hand falls to his chest, pointed nails trailing across his pectorals, skimming teasingly over his nipples, before pausing. she wanted to do this right, to have fun with it. "do you want me to sit on the bleachers and wear your jersey, baby?" spoken in a softer tone, she's aiming to commit to the role, eager to gauge his reaction. "do you want to fuck me in it?"

[petitsdieu]

( c ) 𝒇𝒕. @egojock

Then call this a Pattern.

Nate looks like he's been dragged by his polo by parents again. A Fourth of July party, family friend? It's the same as any backyard gathering only this is water-front money.

The woman petting through blonde hair is not her mother. But is almost old enough to be — and Hara riddles off a morning story: something about a ripetide pull and a lifeguard staring down at her, dreamy dreamy hot like an angel aglow —she didn't care she almost died when she was wet in two ways. The circle collected on outer living room furniture all giggle into their wine. Hara does the same.

She sits up and moves when all that's left in her glass is feet trails that slip-drip themselves into a puddle.

She's noticed him within the hour in sideviews and glimpses, heard little scraps of his conversation hear and there. She's yet to really talk to him.

The transition from outside to in is easy. Kitchen title feel nice against bare skin. She re-pours some Moscato from the fridge. Gets a full view of him now.

❛ Hey, Nate. ❜

❛ Feeling better? ❜

[carminekings]

❛ i always thought it would be better to be a fake somebody, than a real nobody. ❜ @egojock

martin crosses his legs, shoulders hunched over as he sips an ice cold lemonade. it isn't as sweet as he'd like; his mom does it best (although anna was good with lemonade too) but he'll take it in opposition of the summer heat. his arms aren't pink under the sun yet. he extends the drink out to nate, paper straw lightly chewed with habit. "what does a nobody look like?"

[awalkoflife]

@egojock

— F. Scott Fitzgerald, from The Love of the Last Tycoon (via lunamonchtuna)

[notcruel]

@egojock are you gonna marry, kiss, or kill me?

It was games like this and truth or dare that eventually led to trouble. This was all new with Nate, but she had liked him for so long. The countless glances during her dance practices, the walks home even if he drove, the constant flirting via text, the instagram comments, they all led to small conversations like these that felt more important than they both let on.

"I don't know." She held on to the rim of the sink she sat on now that they were alone. The question had been posed before Maddy had suddenly stood up and said she was bored. Really what she had wanted was time alone with Nate. "I don't think you want me to kill you." Her sparkling eyes fluttering as she continued to flirt, "But then again," her neck craning as she pulled him closer towards her and held on to his shirt. "I think you might get tired of just kissing me." Truth was she doubted she ever could. "So I guess that leaves the last option and I don't think you're really ready for that." Keep it casual, that's what she told herself even if she had already pictured what her life would be like if they ever got serious. "Do I get a fourth option?"

[felixferitas]

i got back in town on tuesday after my vacation in the PNW, but i'm still acclimating so i'll be drafting and queueing replies this weekend maybe! same goes for all my drafts & owed replies over on @egojock. it's been a hot minute, so if there's anything you want to drop, don't be afraid to lmk.

[cemeterysgirl]

types of people — flowers.

bold what applies; italicise what applies sometimes/verse dependent.

𝐑𝐎𝐒𝐄𝐒     -               true romantic, loving the classics, pricked fingers,  perfect makeup done to impress, bruises easily,  beloved but unknown, soul as old as time, overused and under-appreciated.

𝐃𝐀𝐈𝐒𝐈𝐄𝐒     -               clean linens, youthful naivety, family, wide open spaces, running barefoot, moving towards instead of away, trying to forget about death, sun blindness.

𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐅𝐋𝐎𝐖𝐄𝐑𝐒     -               standing tall,  strong roots, a home to always return to, warm summer air, holding onto lost hope, belief in growth,  painted overalls,  split ends.

𝐁𝐋𝐔𝐄𝐁𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐒     -               the end of spring,  determination for the truth, cold and cautious, moonlight on windowsills,  the taste of ice, unnecessary shyness, quiet belief in the extraordinary, complicated morals.

𝐃𝐀𝐅𝐅𝐎𝐃𝐈𝐋𝐒     -               mom friend, sweets, the smell of baking, riverbanks, leaving behind a toxic situation, being happy with your reflection, believing in luck, moving in a pack.

𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐄𝐒     -               sour candies, unappreciated elegance, valor, crystals projecting rainbows on white walls, unintended organization, old royalty, refusal to bow, learning a new language for the fun of it.

𝐋𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐄𝐒     -               secret poison,  perfect handwriting,  crisp consonants,  pressed and ironed sheets, open windows,  infinite persistence, thick skin, colder hands.

𝐋𝐈𝐋𝐀𝐂     -              fleeting and fair, strong but delicate, radiating good vibes, the beauty of falling apart, the joy in being scattered, soft fabrics, whirlwind romance,  keeping the door open.

tagged by: @egojock ᥫ᭡ tagging: @sonsofkhaos @kookheir @1ststab @signetied @cutieten @irrwicht @vicletnight and whoever sees this... tag!

[awalkoflife]

@egojock

[carminekings]

— nᴧte jacobs x joe wᴧlsh ( for @egojock )

[carminekings]

— ❛ i'm despicable but i love you. ❜ @egojock

they sit in the bed of nate's truck, legs hanging off the open end as martin sucks the salt from his fingers, greasy fry box empty in between them. he turns to stare, thumb swiping over his gums. it is a confession made weightier by the nervous expression wrung over nate's features, the sincerity there quickly overrun by nausea. martin doesn't overthink it (feels it plain and simple, even if few think this plausible) and with an easy smile, replies, "i love you too." he isn't bashful, but the settling exchange reminds him of: late night drives down empty streets, and watching groundhog day in his boxers, and his father's favourite red flannel shirt, and his mother's lemonade, and crispy fries that stay crispy until the end of the meal, and nate when he smiles wide enough that his eyes turn into crescent moons. in those particular moments, martin is present in the world. his feet are on the ground, and the words that fall from his mouth come out smooth; the kettle is hot and the freezer is cold; and if he stands perfectly still, he can hear his own heartbeat. nate sits beside him. ba-dump. ba-dump. ba-dump.

[notcruel]

@egojock "Strip for me. Slowly. I want to savor every inch of you. “ ( bc variety is the spice of life )

This was new. Usually their moments were rushed and need filled, passionate and heated from earlier arguments. Sometimes things were slow and need which were Maddy's favorite times, but those were rare and dew between. Her pause at his words she smiled as she took the hint that he wanted to actually savor moments with her. Lingerie was something she seemed to always put on for him, more for show and to keep up with his fantasy than it was about the whole foreplay of it all. Her soft skin and all the preparation before he would come over would often serve as foreplay for her and her alone.

Now going slower she only lowered her robe's shoulder. The strap of her silk nightgown sliding off her shoulder only to expse more of her body but nothing she wouldn't have exposed on a typical day. Her hands reached out to his hair. One sleeve of her robe off as she spread her fingers and ran her manicured nails against his scalp. Hand gliding to the back of his neck and bringing him closer to her body she did something strippers never would have allowed and let him touch her. Holding his chin she looked deep into his eyes. Holding his gaze she felt more vulnerable than she ever had with him. "I love you so much." Her words seeming to be clouded by the lust she felt as she finally slipped out of the robe. The silk waterfalled to the floor near them. Taking his hands she let them slide across her soft skin leading him beneath the fabric she let his hands be what raised the hem of her dress. "I need you to touch me." She admitted, allowing him to explore more of her body than he ever truly had. Slow to continue moving her dress she wondered if he would take the lead and take her dress off her. If he didn't she would tease him even further. Perhaps he didn't know just what he had gotten himself into when he had said the word slowly.

[awalkoflife]

@egojock

imgonnagetyouback - taylor swift

[notcruel]

@egojock ❛  my first instinct is to protect you, no matter the cost.  ❜ ( from @egojock .. early s1 naddy ?? )

Starry eyed would be the only way to describe the way Maddy looked up at Nate. This was it, it was happening. She had found someone to be in a relationshipw tih who was going to be so different than actually worth it. She had found the relationship that was going to be so different than her parent's relationship. Reaching out for Nate she held on to his sides as she shook her head. "It's like you're not real." A hint of a smile on her lips. "You're so sweet." She didn't know who he thought she needed protection from. Sure guys were terrible and there was always someone hanging about her but they all didn't matter as long as she was with Nate/ "Seriously, it's like you just know what to say to me." She moved in, holding on to him instead of standing on her toes to kiss him. "You don't have to protect me but it's nice to know that you would."