#— & egojock.

[carminekings]

— ❛ i realize you can change the people, change the scenery, but you can’t change your own rotten self. ❜ @egojock

nate's come round enough that joe's gotten good at picking out the sincere comments from the full of shit ones. sometimes he likes to be ridiculous for the sake of it — moan over an itch he'll forget the following hour — but on occasion, once in a sensitive blue moon, he will mean every word. his heart will pour out of his chest like pungent gasoline, and nate will hate the admission more than anyone else privy to it. this time, joe's senses suggest this particular confession one of the latter. (the truth is in the details: the discomfort, the impatience, and the self-flagellation.) he's learned to adapt to both extremes, and it's highly convenient then that his cheeks hollow around a joint. he sucks it red, and with a shuddering sigh, holds the rest of it out for nate to pinch. "...c'mon now." there is no rolling set of eyes, no scoff nor condescending sigh — only a quiet look and an impending high. the words aren't alien anyway, they echo with unbearable reason. joe elbows him once more. "dunno. yer a'right sometimes."

[cemeterysgirl]

ㅤㅤit was late out, with the bright moon illuminating her fresh bruises whilst the cold night air nipped at them. an unwanted reminder of her existence. as if she needed one. but the pain helped to remind her that she was, in fact, alive. whether she wanted to be or not. she was stood on the balcony that overlooked the motels parking lot, her figure being arrhythmically lit up by the flickering light overhead as she bent over the railing a tad — half-lit cigarette dangling between coffin-shaped nails before she puffed it back to life.

ㅤㅤtight fitting skirt was hiked up enough to expose the still red cheeks of her plump ass, matching scars scattering the back of her thighs as she bent over the bannister when she spotted a familiar, and handsome, face. " hey, " smoke spilt from matte black lips as she spoke, whistling to get his attention regardless of the time. " cigarette boy. " or at least that's how she remembered him. a conversation and a smoke. she was terrible at names. " you feel like sharing tonight? i'm down to my last smoke. " a veiled way of asking for company. sometimes it was just nice to be with someone that wasn't paying.

closed starter for @egojock.

[ourpretender]

/ hello FRIENDS — sry for Only making posts abt being away but i will be on a trip (again) starting today till the 9th !!! brought my laptop with me though so , crossing my fingers that i'll be writing anyway !! thanks for all the patience as always !! 💜

[notcruel]

@egojock “Try to keep quiet…we wouldn’t want to get caught.”

It was one thing to tell her what to do in bed, but it was another to tell her to gauge her actual bliss. Sure they shouldn't have been having sex in his house. Things had changed so drastically that the fact that she was even in his bedroom was something that was frowned upon by everyone she knew. Then again, what did they know about how much they both cared about one another? "Make me." Her words challenging as she pulled him into her even more. A low groan escaping her as she smiled and moved her hips. "So what if we get caught?" Her body continuing to move as she guided him deeper. "Do you want us to stop?" Teasing she sunk down onto him completely taking him in as deep as she could. Her small frame taking as much painful pleasure as she could. "Tell me you love me."

[redemptioninterlude]

i know you don't care , but can you listen ? ( @egojock & rue .. perhaps both prompts set at the winter formal ? )

don't smile at me ( billie eilish ) meme ( no longer accepting ) + @egojock // nate

the dress jules gives her itches - half finished on the inside of it, the lace scratches at her skin, leaving her feeling suffocated. or was that jules? back there in that bathroom, telling her to KISS HER without having to ask her, and all she wanted to scream was that it wouldn't make a difference, would it? there'd always be an anna, or a tyler, or whatever, and rue? rue somehow lacked whatever manic pixie dream boy energy that jules seemed to gravitate towards. it doesn't feel fair. none of it did, sniffing as she swat at the tears that slip down her face ( urgh... ), the feeling of anxiety closing in within her chest. she hates this shit. all it does is make her fucking angry, and honestly, rue doesn't know what to do with that feeling.

but she know somebody who DOES. for whom anger was their second nature, simmering there just beneath the surface beneath a lake of calm composure. oh, nate jacobs was the anointed son, made the pride and joy, thanks to the perennial fuck ups of the eldest. the one that cal jacobs, that dirty little kid fucker felt was the golden boy, the one that best reflected his imagine, taken in tune with his own fucked up understanding of society. she wouldn't have guessed it, not until that night at the carnival, and even then only because his reaction to jules had been so viscerally clear. no wonder nate was so bent on destroying what could only be so good and so perfect that rue couldn't look away, so much so that it felt like she'd fallen in love with a girl who was like the sun, and oh, what did the sun ever care for within a mortal girl?

she's too sober, too clear, to aware - the nerves jangle, awkward, within her body, and she doesn't want to be here, she doesn't want to see him. but rue's the one who followed him, right? right. she's losing the plot, herself, and everything, feeling as if it's unknotting within her uncomfortably and wondering what she'd done to make jules feel as if she needed someone else, and how that hurts and how nate would probably find this all like, HILARIOUS or whatever because... yeah. yeah. as he says when they get to talking. jules has some very real dreams. and it's fucking hard... it's just, like, really fucking hard to imagine that she's the one who's meant to be there, for it, or if she's just a stand in for the best friend and the place above a convenience store story that she's gone and painted in her head.

" i know you don't care, but can you listen? "

it's loathsome that he picks up on it. how shaken it leaves her, the doubt. he's the kind of poison that picks up and exploits those things, oh, she won't be so foolish. so taken. he's just a ( tall ) white boy with an ego and a problem, and she knows that he sees everything as a matter of taking, and she had no intent of being made to wear the same humiliation he so gleefully pushed upon others. psychopath. maniac. the insults are tearing through her skin. "WHY, NATE? so you can feel good about yourself for letting off another one liner? good job, man! everyone, a big round of applause for nate jacobs." she claps, as if to a crowd, her eyes narrowing over him. "you did it! you're clever. now do you really feel good after all that? awesome. i'm happy for you. so how about, you take that feeling, don't say anything, and we can all just assume you said something worthy of a gold star. okay? okay."

[carminekings]

❛ i always thought it would be better to be a fake somebody, than a real nobody. ❜ @egojock

martin crosses his legs, shoulders hunched over as he sips an ice cold lemonade. it isn't as sweet as he'd like; his mom does it best (although anna was good with lemonade too) but he'll take it in opposition of the summer heat. his arms aren't pink under the sun yet. he extends the drink out to nate, paper straw lightly chewed with habit. "what does a nobody look like?"

[awalkoflife]

continued from (x) with nate / @egojock.

she's never been good. she's never even come close. something tells the witch that he doesn't mind though, not when she's wrapped up in his sheets. she's left her marks all over him; in his car, his shower, his locker room, his bed. winnie welcomes the enthusiasm, especially when it's met and matched with the same level of unfiltered desire. "what would that entail, exactly?" the redhead asks, curious now. they were used to playing games with each other, but the role of a good girl was far too foreign a concept. if she were to pull it off for him, she'd need some guidance, perhaps a few ground rules. what would she get in return? the thought makes her brain tick over, a devilish smirk sent his way when he smooths his palm across her face. her cheek leans in to his touch, resting her weight against his momentarily, green eyes meeting his gaze.

his kiss leaves his taste fresh on her tongue, her own fingertips rising to brush against his jaw. "don't you have a big game tomorrow?" she already knows that he does. their entire campus had been transformed into a shrine for the football team. "wouldn't a good girl convince you to preserve your energy?" winnie's hand falls to his chest, pointed nails trailing across his pectorals, skimming teasingly over his nipples, before pausing. she wanted to do this right, to have fun with it. "do you want me to sit on the bleachers and wear your jersey, baby?" spoken in a softer tone, she's aiming to commit to the role, eager to gauge his reaction. "do you want to fuck me in it?"

[ourpretender]

❛ somehow, out of everyone. even my own damn friends, you know me more. ❜ @egojock

sitting against the headboard with a 3-ring binder placed upon his lap, oliver's weak attempt at wrestling away a smile, ceases. their history textbooks stand in as temporary barriers, hills for crossed legs to knock against when talks of familiarity rise. he would nestle in, tease the handsome pull of nate's mouth, if not for their location and platonic reputation. oliver makes do with a sheepish grin, a capped ballpoint tapping at his scrawled notes. "does it help that i know you biblically?"

[awalkoflife]

@egojock

— F. Scott Fitzgerald, from The Love of the Last Tycoon (via lunamonchtuna)

[petitsdieu]

( c ) 𝒇𝒕. @egojock

Then call this a Pattern.

Nate looks like he's been dragged by his polo by parents again. A Fourth of July party, family friend? It's the same as any backyard gathering only this is water-front money.

The woman petting through blonde hair is not her mother. But is almost old enough to be — and Hara riddles off a morning story: something about a ripetide pull and a lifeguard staring down at her, dreamy dreamy hot like an angel aglow —she didn't care she almost died when she was wet in two ways. The circle collected on outer living room furniture all giggle into their wine. Hara does the same.

She sits up and moves when all that's left in her glass is feet trails that slip-drip themselves into a puddle.

She's noticed him within the hour in sideviews and glimpses, heard little scraps of his conversation hear and there. She's yet to really talk to him.

The transition from outside to in is easy. Kitchen title feel nice against bare skin. She re-pours some Moscato from the fridge. Gets a full view of him now.

❛ Hey, Nate. ❜

❛ Feeling better? ❜

[notcruel]

@egojock are you gonna marry, kiss, or kill me?

It was games like this and truth or dare that eventually led to trouble. This was all new with Nate, but she had liked him for so long. The countless glances during her dance practices, the walks home even if he drove, the constant flirting via text, the instagram comments, they all led to small conversations like these that felt more important than they both let on.

"I don't know." She held on to the rim of the sink she sat on now that they were alone. The question had been posed before Maddy had suddenly stood up and said she was bored. Really what she had wanted was time alone with Nate. "I don't think you want me to kill you." Her sparkling eyes fluttering as she continued to flirt, "But then again," her neck craning as she pulled him closer towards her and held on to his shirt. "I think you might get tired of just kissing me." Truth was she doubted she ever could. "So I guess that leaves the last option and I don't think you're really ready for that." Keep it casual, that's what she told herself even if she had already pictured what her life would be like if they ever got serious. "Do I get a fourth option?"

[redemptioninterlude]

maybe you should leave before i get too mean . ( @egojock for rue . )

don't smile at me ( billie eilish ) meme ( no longer accepting ) + @egojock // nate

woe wop wop wop wop - there goes a chopper overhead. the sound feels dull within her ears... or maybe that's the drugs, pretty white things in amber bottles that she hates staring at, which is like, kinda fuckin' funny in a way because she's probably stolen shit like this by the fistful in a desperate pinch within someone else's bathroom. places with floral print wallpaper or stripy tile. yellowing sinks and toothpaste ringing beneath the electric tooth brush. the slow pull, in and out, of what it's like breathing when you're out here playing THE WALKING DEAD among the living.

the sun is blistering above, and she thinks about the way that lexi's play was like. kinda insane. KINDA BRILLIANT, but also fucking crazy. touching and lovely, sad and embarrassing. how it hurts to see herself reflected, the highs and the lows of it all, though she supposes that nobody really preps you for that shit. or well. she thinks lexi tried. she'd just been too far out on her detox bullshit to remember to read the script. would it have changed anything? probably not. who would have wanted to see what was a rather inspirational night unfold any other way than it is? ah - wait. maybe one person.

" maybe you should leave before i get too mean. "

so sits the ANOINTED SON. he'd made a retreat, somewhere in the second act, before things explode on the stage and rue finds herself glued to her seat as maddy shucks her heels and races in to save the day. rue swallows ; he's noticed her first, before she sees him. a mistake. her body, tensed, relaxes... a tired frown creasing her features, her head shaking slightly. "... you know nobody gives a fuck about that stuff in the play but you, right?" that half snarl that still holds, in spite of herself. "grow up, nate. like seriously. grow the fuck up. high school isn't gonna be forever."

[awalkoflife]

@egojock

[felixferitas]

i got back in town on tuesday after my vacation in the PNW, but i'm still acclimating so i'll be drafting and queueing replies this weekend maybe! same goes for all my drafts & owed replies over on @egojock. it's been a hot minute, so if there's anything you want to drop, don't be afraid to lmk.

[carminekings]

— nᴧte jacobs x joe wᴧlsh ( for @egojock )

[petitsdieu]

RANDOMLY GENERATED HEADCANONS. use this generator to create some randomly generated headcanons for your muse(s)!

I. Hara was forced to eat cement as a child. II. Hara is a bottom. III. Hara hates being alone. IV. Hara is a cry baby. V. Hara is constantly singing for no reason. VI. Hara steals other peoples clothes. VII. Hara Ora uses the word "like" like a comma. VII. Hara is smart but also very stupid. IX. Hara is going to heaven.

tagged by: @nightmarefuele + @deficd tagging: @rejectory @sieverts @egojock @ourpretender @godstrayed @redemptioninterlude @withbeasts @glacierheart @devourcr @platiinums @berylcluster @citizenstarlight @darkmade @lightburnsyou