#౨ৎ ﹕abigail morris ( threads. ) .ᐟ

[365partygrl]

growing pains, ethel cain. ౨ৎ @spoiliage

it's a routine at this point. something abby's grown used to. waiting around the house until khalil comes back from whatever he likes to do. and in the last thirty or so years since she's been dead, she's never felt something this close to home. feet tap against hardwood, combat boots she never takes off thudding in rhythm. adorning her body is a jacket she found rummaging through khalil's things. she liked that he didn't mind her curiosity, but she's a little afraid of how he'll feel about her wearing his clothes. honestly, she's just hoping he'll think she looks cool. despite the garment obviously drowning her, she feels cool. because khalil looks cool. khalil is cool, according to abby. and yeah, she's never been a good judge of character and this is the first person she's interacted with in decades. but she think's he's so fucking cool. head tilts at the sound of the door. she's quick to her feet, knees wobbling awkwardly. ‟ hi. ” it's mousey. she tries speaking up. ‟ have a good day today? ”

[365partygrl]

head in the wall, ethel cain ౨ৎ @knifepcrty

‟ sometimes you make me wanna put my fucking head through the wall. ”

[365partygrl]

suddenly abby is wishing he was still oblivious because she's not a huge fan of how his words made her feel. looks better on you. rings in her ear as she smiles stupidly, avoiding eye contact with him. laughs a little louder. ‟ honestly i just kind of feel cold all the time. even with this on, or if i put a blanket around me. there's always just this chill. which, i guess, would make sense according to ghost movies. ” she's trying to think of a time when she didn't feel freezing. last time she can recall is before she died. if her heart still beat, it'd be thudding against her chest right now. abby's not really sure how to react to these feelings occurring in the pit of her stomach. it's been so long since she's felt anything. it's kind of freaking her out. brown eyes stare at him, half with adoration and half with the slightest annoyance. ‟ cds are cool. ” she finally gives in, arms crossed over her chest with a pout. ‟ but still, you don't have to get me anything. really. i don't even have anything to listen to it on and, like, i dunno... just being here is cool enough for me. ”

     " yeah ? " fuck, he was blushing, not enough to visibly redden the surface of his skin past the sun-bitten flush, but the heat basically radiated off his ears into a thick bed of hair. being suave didn't come naturally, it was a performance - the flirtatious quips, all of it, only with the sole goal of scoring a date, or a bed to sleep in for the night, or even just a free drink. he'd hoped that abby wouldn't superimpose those pitfalls onto the reflection of his true character — after all, he was unsure if she'd even seen it herself, bore witness to any of the awful dates brought home. " keep it. looks better on you than it does me. it'll keep you warm while i show you how to work the tv ... if you still feel things like temperature, i guess. " and he meant that sincerely. khalil couldn't help but think of it so deeply, viewing the cloth draped over her frame as an extension of himself and thus, wrapped around her. abby. as close as they were, they haven't shared so much as a high-five, and it killed him ( for lack of a better word ). he continued on, the same smile never faltering, but rather softening at the sound of her history. you are pretty, he so badly wants to say. but what would that do ? would that change anything ? would that amend the odds that stood against them — flesh and blood versus the grey matter that sat beside him ? " i'm basically begging to get you a gift and you think i'm gonna ask you to leave ? god, abby. " it was spoken in endearment more than anything. " what'll it be, then ? vinyl or cd ? "

[365partygrl]

chooses not to respond to his comments on hell, already feeling like she should have never brought up such a topic. but she perks up a little at what he says next. almost wants to call him an idiot or something. looks down at her lap instead. ‟ no, not really. i found this in your closet. ” shrugs shoulders to reference the jacket. ‟ i wasn't snooping. ” she was totally snooping. ‟ i was gonna take it off after trying it on but — kinda feels like a hug. ” face contorts into something of disagreement, eyes squinted as her lips pout to the side. ‟ it's not really an afterlife though. i feel like... afterlife has to mean something else. somewhere else to live through and experience. and i'm not really living. just existing. all i do is wander. it's just really... lonely and empty. ” she's staring blankly ahead, voice monotone. would sigh and tilt her head back towards him. ‟ and i don't really know how to work the n*tflix. ” an honest confession but she can't help but slightly mirror his expression. lips are pulling upwards, it's a shy smile and if there was still blood coursing through her veins there'd probably be some color in her cheeks. bambi eyes blink, and all she can really do is shrug at his excitement. ‟ well, it was the nineties. i was a pretty girl before i died, or at least that's what people would tell me. i was wearing a cute dress and hung outside the venue to see what people were so excited about. some guy let me in. but man, it was sooo loud in there. and people were acting weird. ” and she's laughing. it's quiet and almost just a breath but it happens. ‟ i liked them both. i think i really liked the vocals from mazzy. and you don't have to get me an album. not quite sure what i'd do with it anyways. ” silence falls over them for a second. abby's cheek is resting against a waving knee before she sighs, adjusting her posture so she's leaning back against the cushion more, legs tucked underneath her. ‟ you know, you can tell me to leave whenever you want me to. i wouldn't want to overstay my welcome or anything. ”

      history has asserted the attraction of opposite forces, though they didn't consider the folly of the odds khalil and abby both stood upon ; the lack of perception versus someone who notices everything, both holding their own grave pitfalls. it easily slips his mind, nearly too late, until khalil is rubbing balled fists against his eyes to swipe each crumb of exhaustion away. " hell seems fun. i mean, if dante's right, then you'd get to meet like ... aristotle, or whatever. ——— hey, you change somethin' ? you look different. " probably a more blasé reaction than desired, but he wasn't completely gone, at least. he turns towards her, knees pressed against his chest with arms hooked around them, chin tucked between. " isn't this still an afterlife ? you're living — as much as you can in this shitty apartment. we finally got n*tflix, that's something ... better than the eternal pyre ... aaaaaaand, you're getting into plumbing now, it seems. thanks for letting me know, by the way. " eternal bitch face be damned, khalil smiles at her - the only person he really, truly smiles around is abby - teeth and all with no ulterior motive in sight. he listened intently, eyes never once leaving her face as she spoke. " yes, music. you're not that old. " another joke. khalil expected her to say as much, with all that he's heard about her personal history, it didn't seem that there was enough leeway for personal exploration. but, what followed easily had him taken aback, forcing his posture to perk up and mouth fall agape. " mazzy star ... but, wait, you're kidding ?! that's sick. oh my god, that's so cool. how did you even manage to do that ? what was it like ? fuck — which one do you prefer ? mazzy or the twins ? i need to get you an album, like, asap. "

[365partygrl]

he doesn't even notice the garment around her shoulders and suddenly she feels very silly for thinking too much about it. makes a face at his comment, doe eyes rolling before sinking to the floor beneath them. ‟ i'm sure death would be much more fun if you got to experience somewhat of an afterlife. sometimes i wish i went to hell instead of - ... whatever this is that i'm doing. ” can't help but look over her shoulder, face contorting in small panic in case someone else heard her. religious guilt still eats her alive as a ghost and abby just thinks that's really bogus. and she was used to his dry humor but lacks the social skills to acknowledge it. hands sink into the pockets of the jacket, resuming her position on the sofa. ‟ my day was alright. did you know the faucet in the bathroom is leaking? ” pulls her knees to her chest. ‟ music? ” she's caught a little off guard by the question. tries to think. she hasn't heard much music recently. lips twitch as she chews at the inside of her cheek. ‟ i wasn't allowed to listen to much music. my dad didn't really like it. unless it was gospel or, like, anything that would sound good from a choir. but then in like... oh, when was it? ” she stares into the empty air, trying to think of the year but everything feels sort of fuzzy. ‟ i can't remember. had to have been early 90s or something. i snuck into a cocteau twins show. was the first time and last time i did anything like that. someone else was playing too that night. may.... minnie... maddy star? somethin' like that. i liked that. it was cool. ”

      the comfort of routine had never been something khalil welcomed. chalk it up to his sagittarius moon, or venus, or whatever, but it made him itch, the same kind of stirring that would occur when sat atop a hot bed of coals or a mountain of red ants — all to say that he doesn't quite like it. regardless of earlier sentiments, he doesn't mind the habit that is abby. mid-shift ( this current phase of his life is being the front desk guy at a tiny record store ) thoughts are engulfed by her, asking himself questions that were wildly impractical to ponder considering her ghastly state. is she okay ? is she bored ? what kind of music does she like ... or did she like ? how did she die ? is she ever going to leave ? if i get chinese takeout tonight, is she able to eat it ? — they're virtually incessant until he walks through the front door, whipping that torn, sun-bleached jansport onto the couch before nonchalantly responding to her greetings. " yeah. 's okay. kinda slow — would much rather be dead than have to do this shit to pay rent. " he hoped that she was used to his humor by now. " you ? " a pause, followed by shuffling. " hey, what kind of music d'you like ? "