#` 𝚌𝚊𝚕𝚒𝚋𝚊𝚎𝚗𝚜 . 𓈊 ﹟in character

[calibaens-moved]

i think i've come to the conclusion that, what's gone on in my life has just crushed me in a way i can't seem to break free from. and as much as i want to be here right now, all i feel is anxious and overwhelmed in a way i can't even describe. which doesn't feel fair to myself or everyone i write with because i wanna give you guys my all and enjoy myself in the process. rather than question my responses and worry that i'm being a bother by changing things if i feel the need to. so i think i finally just need to give in to what i think i've been trying to tell myself for ages, but the fomo got me good. and that's to take a damn break and give myself the chance to get to a place where everything i'm feeling as of right now, no longer exists. so then i can be here and vibe with everyone without all the worries that plague me at the moment. these blogs won't go anywhere for the time being. because i'll be back to update and what not whenever i have something to say. and if i do happen to move just for that fresh start when i'm ready to be here to write, if anyone is still interested, you'll all be the first to know.

i'm sorry to everyone i've messed around with my coming and going though. i wanted to be okay but i've definitely realised that i'm not.

[calibaens-moved]

they've got their own taylor's version now.

amberscott (yeehaw version) — @calibaens.

[calibaens-moved]

*josh washington vc* can't we all just get along. but for real though. this isn't high school. we're all adults. i mean, fuck, i'm almost 28. let's act our ages and have fun on this hellsite.

[calibaens-moved]

i am slowly working on my return / remakes. but i added a new rule, that i thought i'd share now, so if anyone doesn't wanna vibe with me anymore, it can be decided sooner rather than later. i've dealt a lot with the life is strange fandom ignoring me, especially when it comes to sean. so i decided that : if you choose to follow nathan, but don't follow sean, i won't be following back.

[calibaens-moved]

the way i'm almost ready to come back and annoy everyone who chooses to follow.

[calibaens-moved]

me logging on here like 'IT'S ONLY BEEN 6 DAYS??' but anyway, hi. i'm not making a return as of yet, but i am doing a lot better than i was 6 days ago. when i do remake, however, i will be doing so with 4 blogs as i've decided to split my multi into two. but i'll explain that a little more when i actually find my way back here. i hope you're all doing well <3

[calibaens-moved]

nathan with the vortex club.

[calibaens-moved]

a couple that steals wagons back together, stays together. ( @prosperae ).

[calibaens-moved]

he  was  a  lot  of  things,  and  a  liar  was  definitely  one  of  them.  but  that  didn’t  mean  he  went  ahead  and  lied  to  her.  not  when  it  came  to  the  hard  stuff,  the  sort  of  thing  that  he  couldn’t  tell  anyone  else.  only  that  started  to  change  once  he  got  close  with  their  photography  teacher.  the  father  figure  he  never  had,  and  the  mentor  that  would  supposedly  take  him  places.  he  no  longer  needed  whatever  pity  he  assumed  she  had  for  him.  the  reason  she  chose  to  spend  time  with  him,  despite  how  popular  she  was  compared  to  him.

❝what  the  fuck  are  you  even  accusing  me  of  lying  to  you  about?  i  told  you  i  couldn’t  hang  out  because  i  had  plans,  it  wasn’t  a  lie,  they  were  just  cancelled.❞  which  wasn’t  entirely  the  truth,  she  just  turned  up  when  he  least  expected  it.  and  whatever  it  was  he  was  up  to,  it  was  off  the  second  she  was  spotted  there  with  him.

❝and  there’s  no  between  the  lines.  i’m  not  blowing  you  off  on  purpose,  or  wanting  nothing  to  do  with  you.  i  just  have  a  life  outside  of  you.❞

@calibaens (♥) / x

֎° ┄────────────╮

"I’m fine, but the way you lie, and how you think that I can’t read between the lines."

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[calibaens-moved]

»» victoria chase sent: »» ❛you’ve been avoiding me.❜

it  wasn’t  like  that,  or  at  least,  he  didn’t  want  her  to  think  so.  but  how  exactly  could  he  act  like  himself  around  her  after  everything  he  had  been  through?  the  secrets  that  he  kept,  and  the  name  he  read  on  a  folder  that  he  couldn’t  seem  to  shake  from  his  mind.

❝so  you  think  that  gives  you  the  right  to  just  walk  straight  into  my  fucking  dorm  room  like  you  own  the  place?❞  news  flash:  he  technically  did.  if  it  wasn’t  for  his  last  name  plastered  all  over  the  building,  he  wouldn’t  be  the  popular  kid  he  was  now.  and  he  definitely  wouldn’t  be  friends  with  the  girl  who  apparently  couldn’t  and  he  guessed  wouldn’t  give  up  on  him.

❝have  you  ever  thought  that  maybe  i’m  busy?  you  know,  with  making  sure  i  have  the  goods  for  every  vortex  club  party,  and  doing  whateverthefuck  it  takes  to  get  my  dad  off  my  back.❞  because  the  email  he  recently  received  was  enough  to  make  him  keep  his  mouth  shut.  especially  when  it  came  to  the  dark  room,  and  the  emotions  he  was  trying  to  deal  with  when  she  entered  the  room.  ❝my  life  doesn’t  revolve  around  you,  victoria,  as  much  as  you’d  probably  like  that.❞  which  wasn’t  fair  to  say,  but  it  wasn’t  like  he  was  in  his  right  mind  to  be  the  version  of  himself  he  usually  was  around  her.

»» @savethebay .

[calibaens-moved]

getting logged out on two blogs in one day, is tumblr trying to tell me something??

[calibaens-moved]

nathan as a celebrity.

[calibaens-moved]

nathan at any and all disney parks.

[calibaens-moved]

nathan read 'because you love him for some fucking reason' and took offence.

[calibaens-moved]

»» rachel amber sent: »» ❛Would you love me if I were a rat?❜ See? Annoying. Good luck, Nathan.

𝑭𝑼𝑪𝑲  𝑴𝑬,  𝑻𝑯𝑰𝑺  𝑨𝑮𝑨𝑰𝑵?  was  all  he  could  think  when  the  question  was  first  asked.  but  then,  what  happened  to  the  worm  she  used  to  be?  or  that  hypothetical  about  her  being  turned  into  a  dog,  and  whether  or  not  he  would  keep  her.  and  where  did  the  rat  even  come  from?  out  of  all  animals  she  could  be,  out  of  anything  she  could  be.  that  didn’t  mean  he  wouldn’t  give  her  an  answer  though.  not  when  he  was  ready  for  his  usual  distain,  before  giving  her  exactly  what  she  was  looking  for.

❝haven’t  we  already  been  through  this  shit?❞  it  was  a  genuine  question,  considering  the  times  he  could  remember.  did  she  really  actually  need  him  to  answer  for  a  third  time?  wasn’t  the  worm  and  the  dog  proof  enough?

he  took  a  deep  breath  in  before  he  even  thought  about  letting  the  words  slip  from  the  tip  of  his  tongue.  they  were  already  waiting  there,  as  if  they  were  programmed  whenever  she  played  this  game.  only  not  because  he  wanted  to  give  her  what  she  wanted,  but  because  the  answer  would  always  be  the  same.

it  didn’t  matter  who  or  what  she  was,  he  would  love  her  just  the  same  as  he  always  did.  which  was  deeper,  and  softer,  than  he  ever  loved  before.

❝the  plague  aside,  yeah,  i  would  love  you  if  you  were  a  fucking  rat.  but  you’d  have  to  sleep  in  a  cage  because  i’m  not  some  fucking  weirdo,  okay?❞

»» @prosperae .

[calibaens-moved]

»» tag drop .