#[thru gritted teeth] despite the horrors i will persist because i have concert tickets

[xiiistruggle]

january is almost over and my mood tracking app is like congrats! your mood stability is 90/100 ignoring the fact that every day almost has been rated 'meh' or 'bad'

have to fill out a risk assessment form and write in detail answers to fun questions like 'how do you hurt yourself' 'how often do you think about hurting yourself' which in turns triggers me thinking about it more which in turn makes me act on it

january is almost over and i haven't read a book, haven't drawn anything or even made an effort to try, haven't finished any of my writing wips just keep starting new things I hate before trashing them, haven't even managed to play games and get any Enjoyment from them

january is almost over and i feel like i'm rotting