#[not that this was exclusive to women in Moonhaven but Aylin grew up in the temple which had a majority female clergy

[slverblood]

I think what makes the most sense is if Aylin has extremely short hair for a long time post-canon, almost shaved if not shaved at times, and then eventually grows it out again. Short hair is just easier to manage when she's already struggling and overwhelmed and adjusting to life after a century of torment. She's also trying to reclaim some power over the trauma of it being cut against her will by essentially revisiting what happened except now she's in control, she's holding the shears. As well as ensuring no one can ever take her hair from her again. She's cutting it off and burning it; there's nothing for them to take. It's an imperfect way of coping, but honestly show me a perfect one.

It's a long time — I'm talking years — before she decides to grow it out again. It's part of an attempt to move beyond what's been done to her, to rediscover how she wants to look not how she thinks it's safe to look. It's another way of reclaiming autonomy and power over herself, wearing her crown of hair in spite of those who would take it from her. It's also done in memory of the people, especially the women, she loved in her past. Erlona, the Four Moons, the priestesses in the temple — hair care was a shared ritual. Even Meadowlin brushed and braided her hair. She struggles a lot with physical touch after being freed, and she's hard on herself about that; she used to be so free with it. She used to fear nothing. But, it starts with trusting Isobel to help with her hair and slowly grows to trusting other people. She has a community again; she has family and friends again; she can trust and be safe and be loved.

Maybe there will be periods where she cuts it again and grows it out and shaves half and styles it a different way and dyes it. Ultimately, it's not about the hair. It's not about beauty or even femininity. It's about what the hair means to her. Having control over her own body and how she presents it. Having a connection to the community, to the people, that were her home. Carrying those rituals of intimacy forward into new relationships, feeling safe and loved again.