#[Somewhere else in Gotham; Harvey suddenly got the urge to beat the shit outta Jon]

[drcraneandmrcrow-blog]

👻 - Someone They Don’t See Often !

Meet the People in My Muse’s Life

👻  - Someone They Don’t See Often

“Yeah - there’s a reason I don’t see Dent often,” Jonathan said bitterly, frowning down at his page as he scribbled a quick note, “’s cause I hate ‘im.” He put his pencil down and leaned back in his chair to give his full attention, elbows resting on the chair’s arms and fingers intertwined. “Some fellas in Arkham seem ta believe we folks with split personalities get along, and I suppose I can say I do get along with Arnold and Scarface. Arnold sympathised with me durin’ a tough time and has never given me reason ta dislike ‘im. Didn’t even take offence when I tried ta stab him with a fork that one time, so that was nice of ‘im. And Scarface and I are civil...despite his repetitive use of the word ‘Beanpole’ in my presence (or ‘Geanpole’, given his speech impediment). Dent, on the other hand? Why, Dent’s given me plenty o’ reasons ta dislike ‘im.

“He’s double-crossed me, used me, stolen from me, threatened ta shoot me off a roof fer interrupting a coin toss, beaten the shit outta me a few times, insulted Scarecrow and I ta hell an’ back and his attempt at offendin’ and/or embarrassin’ me by inferring that Edward is my lover - just cause we happen ta hang around each other in Arkham an’ have worked together a handful o’ times - got old the first time ‘e said it.” He scoffed. “Please. I got better taste ‘an that.

“In any case, Dent and I jus’ plain don’t get along. We never have. He’s too annoying fer me ta get along with, both his personality and his gimmick. Oh, sure, we’ll work together, should there be somethin’ in it fer the both of us. Usually the result of the Penguin callin’ us both in or the Joker rounding a bunch o’ Rogues up. We’ve both taken part in break-outs in Arkham, one of which he ruined cause he had ta stop an’ flip his goddamn coin. Compulsions, huh? They can be real cruel sons o’ bitches.” He sniffed. “But that’s a him problem, not a me problem. Speakin’ of Arkham, he’s also got a very annoyin’ habit of talkin’ to himself at night.” He rolled his eyes. “I don’t know why Arkham likes ta house us near each other - probably due to the whole ‘we both got another fella or two livin’ in our heads and thus we must get along’ crap - but Dent’s late-night yammerin’ has cost me a few hours of Z’s.” He frowned. “Sure, I talk ta Scarecrow at night (granted, I haven’t been forced on my meds), but we keep it to our-damn-selves. 

“I digress; it’s very rare fer Harvey and I ta get along. More often than not, we’ll have a common enemy - usually the Bat - an’ we’ll team up ta take ‘em down, or maybe we both heard a good joke and our sense of humours prove ta be closer in common than we think. Sometimes, he’ll deliver a good insult ta someone an’ I’ll be there ta back it up or I’ll drive someone ta suicide an’ he’ll be there ta say, ‘For fuck’s sake, Crane, he owed us money’. It’s a good system we got goin’ on.”

He shrugged. “Scarecrow hates Harv, Harv hates Scarecrow. I hate Harvey, Harvey hates me. Scarecrow hates Harvey, Harvey hates Scarecrow. I hate Harv, Harv hates me. There’s no two personalities that get along in this equation, and we’re quite content ta keep it that way. I see no benefit ta having Harvey as an ally, much less a chum. That would mean seein’ him more often and - woo. I am not willin’ ta do that. But I think I’ve made that clear.” Jonathan stretched out his limbs, popping joints back into place. “Dent can - by all meanings of the phrase - go fuck himself. An’ if he keeps me awake at night again, I swear ta God, I will be marchin’ over ta his cell and shoving that coin up his ass.” He shrugged. “Whichever one - I ain’t picky.”