#[[the fact he doesn't use her name or her face because he's a thief and she's an assassin and they are SMART okay??]]

[himbohotel]

☎ ahem

Put ☎ in my ask for your muses info in my muses phone:

NAME: Nightshade

RINGTONE: Edge of Seventeen--Stevie Nicks

PICTURE: 

LAST TEXT RECEIVED: [sms] Staying gone means staying gone.

LAST TEXT SENT: [sms] This is nothing but a courtesy call.

[mapofthemazeinthemirror]

𝐁𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐏𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐬

Noble reader x Prince beomgyu

author's note: This isn't very fleshed out because it's not something that I had planned on writing — there’s a lot of telling not showing — and I have other things that I want to work on that this idea interrupted! I also kept a lot of details vague to allow readers to imagine your own interests. I hope this doesn't read like it was rushed (it took me about a month) and that I caught all the errors. This is inspired by Violet aka @blackhairedjjun and her fic Flowers of Every Colour. Her persona of Prince Yeonjun and vivid scenes live in my mind and I recommend you read it if you haven't yet!

word count: 6k

The prince often feels overwhelmed. Sometimes it seems as if everyone in the castle is looking for him at all times. Officials come to find him during his lessons, upsetting his tutors. His tutors come searching for him when council runs late and cuts into lesson time. No matter where he is or what duty he’s busy with, he receives notes from staff or delegates. He feels as though he’s in a constant game of tug-of-war, with his attention being the thing that’s fought over.

After a long lesson that had been rescheduled to a late evening hour to allow time for an urgent discussion with his advisors in the afternoon, Beomgyu could feel a headache coming on. As he departed from the study where tutoring was held, he felt heavy with exhaustion, a pressure pain behind his eyelids. He was so on edge that his head whipped toward every creak of the old floors, every distant sound of a door opening or closing, anxious that it was somebody seeking him out for yet another task that only he could see to or decision only he could approve. He just needed a minute – one minute at least – to himself. Every waking hour was spent in the presence of others, so much filling his days that his mind played it all back as he lay in bed at night trying to chase some much needed rest. Since becoming his parents’ consort, it felt as though he hardly had time to hear his own thoughts.

There was one place he knew nobody would look for him. Wearily he carried himself across the long open hall, past the top of the grand marble staircase he usually took to his rooms. He felt a little paranoid with the way he kept glancing around and over his shoulder as if he might be attacked at any moment by a “there you are, your highness.” If his father saw him now, he’d be scolded for looking like a thief in his own castle.

On reaching his destination, he breathed a sigh of relief. The library was quite large, with wall to wall mahogany shelves, beautifully covered atlases and historical volumes as far as the eye could see. Unlike the rest of the castle with its overbearing chandeliers, the library was lit with the soft glow of sconces. Finding a desk tucked away in a corner, Beomgyu sank into a chair. This was an area of the castle he hadn’t visited more than a handful of times, and never of his own will. He hadn’t been keen on reading growing up as his older female cousins had, always requiring a book to occupy them during the duration of their stay when they visited. The young prince had always preferred to spend his time outside whenever he could, and he'd found the silence of the library was stifling. It was bliss to him now. He only wished the buzzing of noise in his head would stop if he soaked in the silence long enough.

The place was empty, nobody to protest his posture as he leant his elbows on the hardwood desk and pressed his face into his hands. Closing his eyes, he willed his mind to quiet. He focused on his breathing. In, out. In, out. In…

It was no use. His head was still swimming with facts from his lesson. With things he had to remember for tomorrow’s conference and the names of politicians he’d met yesterday, their faces all blurred together in his mind. With his advisors calling for him, the head of house calling for him, everything needing his deliberation–

He dropped his head onto his arm on the desk. Even the silence couldn’t help him, it seemed. Was this to be his life? A mind full of endless chatter?

Beomgyu’s tired eyes wandered over the spines of the books he could see on the far wall. Their rich colours, greens and reds, whites and browns, many with delicate gold foiling of titles he couldn’t make out. His eyes traced up the aged ladder leaning against the shelves, the one he was always given a telling off by his chaperone for playing on whenever he was dragged up here. The corner of his mouth turned up at the thought of those simpler days. His cousins had married and had children, far too busy to visit except for special occasions – usually only those of a ceremonial nature. The last time he’d seen them, the children hadn’t remembered him at all, it had been so long.

Sighing unconsciously, his gaze drifted to the decorated ceiling, not even making the effort of lifting his head from his arm. The elegant painting that adorned the library ceiling had been done with a skilled hand. Beomgyu couldn’t even begin to imagine how many hours something so beautiful and detailed would have taken. It was a dazzling scene of the night sky, with clouds and stars that seemed to swirl around each other in a silent dance. He could see every fine stroke that had gone into creating the layering hues that made up the deep night sky, that brought texture to the clouds and made them look as though a gentle breeze could move them, and stars that seemed so meticulously placed. He’d never looked so attentively at the art before, but he found a new appreciation for the work as he discovered his thoughts had grown quiet. Maybe this was why people spent so much money on paintings, he pondered, before his eyes drooped to a close.

The prince had almost completely dozed off when a soft gasp pulled him from the edge of sleep. Eyes blinking open, he realized that he’d gotten far too comfortable. He felt slightly groggy as he lifted his head from his arm, which had gone dead with the weight, and wondered at how long he’d been sitting there. Thumbing at his lip, he found a wet spot had begun to grow at the corner.

“I’m sorry,” came a voice, the source of the gasp that had brought him back. Would he have spent the entire night here if he’d not been woken? His dazed eyes looked up and found you, shrouded in dim light. He caught sight of recognition dawning on your face before you dipped into a respectful bow.

“I’m so sorry, your highness, I didn’t mean to disturb you,” you said hurriedly, as if the words couldn’t get out fast enough. Did you think he was going to scold you for being here at the same time he was? “I was just leaving…”

Fighting off the lingering drowsiness, Beomgyu waved a hand, feeling sheepish at being caught in this position. “Please, there’s no need.”

You seemed to relax a little at that; the way your shoulders lowered as if you'd been tensed didn’t go unnoticed by the prince’s eyes. He had become skilled in recognizing stress, whether it was because he grew up in a somewhat high-stakes environment or he was sensitive to it now as a stressed adult himself, he was unsure. The book you were cradling in one arm caught his attention now that you weren’t clutching it so tight. Beomgyu didn’t recognize you, and he knew everyone who worked in the castle. It bewildered him a bit that you knew him but he didn’t know you, despite that being the case with almost every person he met. Suddenly he felt a touch embarrassed. Not only had you caught him in an unmannerly state, but he didn’t know your name, and he couldn't think of a single thing to say.

“I really was leaving,” you caught him out again by speaking first. Your eyes met for a long silent moment, and Beomgyu thought the silence had never been less stifling. Then you seemed to remember yourself, eyes dropping to the book in your arms. “I just need to put this back.”

Beomgyu stared at the back cover of that book as if it could help him, too occupied with scrambling inside his head for something to say to notice the way you nervously brushed the hair away from your face and stole shy glances at him.

“What is it?” he blurted. Internally he cursed himself for the way it sounded. He’d only wanted to say something before you walked away. There was an overwhelming feeling he couldn’t name. A longing for you to stay. A feeling of stupidity for not being his usual collected self.

As someone with an official title, meeting new people was always planned, always with a purpose, an end goal. He knew each time what was expected and required of him; how to act, questions to ask and answers to give. This was the first time he could remember meeting someone by accident, and it didn’t seem to Beomgyu that he was very good at it. Taking a breath, he attempted to reign in his panic and try again. “What are you reading?”

You had to look down and check. Turning it over in your hands, you revealed the cover to him with a shy smile. With just one glimpse at the title, Beomgyu knew it would be of no use to him in trying to make conversation. It was a topic he knew nothing about.

“Oh,” he said aloud. He hadn’t meant to. Hoping you hadn’t heard the disappointment in his voice, he rushed to cover himself. “Is it… good?”

Your small laugh surprised him. The sound of it lessened the knots in his stomach, even as he wondered if he had made a fool of himself.

“It’s useful,” you answered, looking him in the eye again. He tried to concentrate as you spoke, to hold on to the words and not get too distracted by your smile or your eyes. “I’m doing research for a scholarship and only the royal library has the books I need. That’s why I’m here,”

“The scholarship?” Beomgyu’s eyes had gone wide. “The scholarship that only one person is picked for every five years?”

Your eyes lowered as you began to blush. “Yes, that one.”

“Wow,” Beomgyu subconsciously sank into his chair in awe. “Your family must be very proud.”

You laughed once more, unaware of how the prince’s eyes lit up each time you did. “Well, I haven't got it yet.”

His mouth caught your contagious smile. “But to even be considered is a great accomplishment.”

Your eyes were the ones to light up this time. Clutching the book close to your chest again, you leaned forward, your fingers curling over the back of the empty chair in front of you. “This is the most impressive library I’ve ever seen.”

Beomgyu sat up taller in his chair. “It is, isn’t it?” He couldn’t help the proud grin that took over his face as he looked around.

“When I come here I lose track of time,” you went on. You were unmistakably animated with enthusiasm, and he was completely taken with you. “The first day I came here, I lost a whole two hours just reading all the spines. Even the ones that aren’t required reading.” Lowering your voice as if to share a secret, you confided, “If I lived here I’d probably never leave the library!”

Beomgyu suddenly felt guilty. He’d never thought about the knowledge that could only be found in this library, and that very few were permitted to the books that contained it.

“If only I had the time to read for pleasure here,” you went on.

“Well, why don't you take some home to read?"

"I'm not permitted to take books out of the library," you said sadly, your attention on the book in your hand as your finger traced the spine.

Beomgyu thought back to the summers he'd shared with his cousins; days he'd spent running around the courtyard in the sunshine while they lazed under a tree with their noses between book pages. "I am," he supplied. His voice came out surprisingly excited. "I could read them for you."

You looked around at him as he stood up from his chair. "Read them for me?"

The prince felt as though his smile was plastered on now. He couldn't hide it if he tried. "I could read them and tell you about them."

He felt your eyes go warm, glowing on him like the sun as you brought out your own smile. "I'm sure you have more important things to do, your highness."

Beomgyu shrugged.

***

That was the reason that Beomgyu started his days by going to the library. He read while he ate his breakfast, which luckily didn't have a set time to be finished by, as it took him a little longer to eat this way. He found himself getting so engrossed in the book that he would forget to eat at the same time, averaging a mouthful to every three paragraphs, his meal cold by the time he finished it.

Then he would read in his room at night. He found that it was an effective way to turn off the noise in his head left over from the day, helping him to sleep better. Many times he would nod off in his chair before waking up and getting into bed. He would take notes sometimes, to better remember the things he wanted to tell you about.

He looked forward to the closing of the day. Once his schedule was complete and it was almost time for dinner, he would slip up to the library in hopes of catching you and relaying all the things he'd read about so far. Excitedly and enthusiastically he'd tell you interesting facts and historical stories from his current book. He had much more energy at the end of the day than he'd had before now that he was sleeping better.

The library had become a sort of safe haven to him now. His tutors complimented his new interest in his learning during lessons, retaining and remembering with a sudden ease, and many of the staff had noted that he had become a lot less tense. The serving staff who saw him with his face behind a book each morning were amused, often surprised as he rattled off facts to them as they laid out and cleared away his breakfast. None of them knew the reason.

On his rare day of rest, he came to find you straight after lunch. He'd confirmed you'd be in the castle today the last time he'd seen you, and he'd been so excited last night that it had taken more than just one hour of reading to send him off to sleep. The day was sunny, and with some persuading Beomgyu convinced you to take a small break from your studies to sit in the garden. You were a little anxious about being caught taking advantage of your privilege to be at the palace by being seen with the prince, but he assured you that he would take care of it.

Deep in the garden, the two of you wandered up the stone path that divided the lawns, chatting casually. The gardens were magnificent. You'd only seen them from a window in the castle, but the further you walked the more beauty there was to see that couldn't be viewed from a distance. The path led to a beautiful paved area with a grand gazebo. Beomgyu ushered you to sit on the ornate bench, forgoing the custom that he should be the one to sit first and taking a seat once you had. Your heart was pounding despite the relief you felt that you'd not run into any trouble on your way out of the castle, and you were sure you felt it leap each time Beomgyu laughed.

He had produced a book when you looked back from admiring the scenery, from somewhere you could not determine. Your face lit up as you took in the familiar cover; it was the one book in the royal library that you'd longed to read most. Beomgyu beamed at your excited reaction as he held it out for your taking. You had to fight the urge to glance around and make sure that nobody was seeing as you took it from his hands.

You read it aloud, with Beomgyu listening intently to every word. In the back of your mind, you wondered how you ended up in this position. When you'd started coming to the castle to study, you had never imagined you'd catch sight of the prince let alone talk to him, and yet you had been in his presence more than anyone else inside the palace. Now, as you read, you took every opportunity to look from the page up at him, finding his eyes on you, his undivided and eager attention completely yours. You were quite comfortable being at his side by now, but sometimes when he looked at you, you could feel the prickling of heat beneath the surface of your cheeks.

You hadn’t thought he would follow through on his offer, but each time you saw him enter the library it made your whole day complete. Truth be told, it had begun to take your mind off studying a little. One moment you’d be reading about a lost dynasty, and the next you’d realise you had stopped taking in any information and your mind had turned to Beomgyu. It also happened that you would dawdle while reshelving the books you’d been studying, delaying your leaving in case the prince showed up, which he always did.

Time seemed to fall away around you as you read. Minutes were marked by each turn of a page and seconds by the now steady beat of your heart, until you were so enthralled by the text that you could have almost forgotten the scene you were truly in.

Beomgyu chuckled lightly and you paused your reading. Your eyes readjusted to the glow of sunlight on the backdrop of bright white flowers beyond the gazebo as you took in his smiling face once more.“You’re really enjoying this one.” His eyes flicked down to the page where you were marking the place you’d stopped with your finger. “You haven’t looked up for the last five pages.”

“I’m sorry,” you couldn’t help but laugh too. You felt almost giddishly content in this moment; in a breathtaking garden with a good book and someone you felt was becoming dear to you.

“No, it’s wonderful,” he assured you. “Is it as good as you imagined?”

“No,” you answered in one breath. “It’s better.” Beomgyu beamed, and it made you feel so warm you might’ve been sitting directly in the sun and not under the shade. But just then, a sudden cloud passed through your mind. “I’ll be sitting the scholarship exam soon.”

Looking out over the garden, you couldn’t help but feel sad as you thought of how much more you would miss your visits to the palace now that you had fond memories and someone you could call a friend here.

“Are you nervous?”

You shook your head softly. It wasn’t the answer to his question. He hadn’t caught your meaning. “My studies will be finished then.”

The prince’s eyes brightened even more. “Then you can read whatever you like, whenever you like.”

“Yes,” you agreed distractedly. In your mind you were going over the future possibilities. If you were awarded the scholarship, you’d be going off to attend university. If it was not granted to you but to someone else, your life would go back to the way it had always been.

Beomgyu seemed to catch the somber look in your eye as you looked to the distance. His expression faltered. “Oh.” He shifted on the bench beside you. “Oh, you mean…”

“I won’t be coming to the castle any more,” you affirmed.

His eyes lost their sparkle only for a moment as he thought through this information. Then he seemed to perk up again. “Well, I can invite you to visit. To visit the library. I’m sure there’s still so much to learn here.”

Your heart swelled with the idea that he wanted to see you more, even if you knew that it wasn’t a probable conclusion. It wasn’t that you didn’t trust the prince’s word, only that you knew that he was a busy man with tight schedules, that you were the eldest child of a noble family with a future to be decided and forged ahead. You returned his smile and tried to ignore the thought that you wished he’d come to the library months ago, that you’d met sooner so you could have had more time together.

“Would you like me to keep reading?” you asked as you reminded yourself that he was a prince and that was all he would ever be to you. It was a fortunate happenstance to have met him at all, you reminded yourself as he nodded eagerly and propped his chin into his hand to listen contentedly as you began to read again.

It didn’t stop you from clinging to every moment and trying to engrave every detail into your memory.

***

During the last few days you visited the castle library, you tried your best to think about Beomgyu as little as possible and focus solely on study. It was a hard task. Passing the grand portrait of the royal family in the hallway without looking was like trying not to glance around when feeling the presence of someone you know. It felt as if the library was haunted now. Almost each corner held a memory of the prince finding you and bumbling eagerly through a tale, helping you carry books back to their shelves, or asking you to come and sit in the garden.

You had seriously considered leaving early, removing yourself from the castle before the hour he usually made his way to the library. But you weren’t sure which would hurt more — knowingly missing out on seeing him in the last few chances you had, or having more encounters in which to grow more attached. The thought of both made something inside of you ache.

Just when you’d convinced yourself you had made up your mind to leave, you passed a window and spotted a carriage pull up at the entrance gates below. The door swung before the footman could rush to open it and there he was. You didn’t know he hadn’t been here in the castle. The heart that had sat heavy in your chest felt leagues lighter just at this distant glimpse of him. As you tried to gauge whether you were relieved you hadn’t gotten away without seeing the prince, you saw him rush inside. He disappeared from view of the window and you looked up into the purple hued sky of the fast oncoming dusk. Maybe you were safe after all. He was clearly on his way to tend to a matter of importance. Feeling assured you could slip away unnoticed, you slid the last volume back onto its shelf and made for the door.

The sound of hurried footsteps on marble gave you pause. Unconsciously you backed away a few steps frin the open double doors, ready to wait out the staff who must have been ascending the staircase on some urgent errand. But the huff of exertion you heard was familiar. Heart pulsing suddenly and in a mind of suspense and disbelief, you waited with bated breath.

When Beomgyu stepped through the doors, you felt an overwhelming gratitude that you hadn’t succeeded in your departure. Even after a mere day without seeing each other, seeing those warm eyes and the smile that broke across his face when he found you felt akin to finding a well of water after a month without rain.

“I’m so glad I found you here,” he said in his usual way, and it sparked your smile just as it always did. You were so occupied with trying to memorize this feeling, to make sure you remembered this moment, that you didn’t reply. Beomgyu was preoccupied himself and didn’t seem to notice. “I got you something.” His grin turned a tiny bit shy.

You blinked in surprise as the words sank in. “You got–? Your Highness–”

Beomgyu chuckled. “Come on, none of that.” Your eyes didn’t leave his as he reached for the hand at your side. His other retrieved something tucked under his arm. Gently he turned your hand upwards, and you hardly had time to process anything before an object was placed into it.

You looked down to see the very book you had been reading in the garden, only it wasn’t the same copy. This seemed to be a newer edition, with a beautiful blue velvet cover. It felt quite luxurious as you turned it over in your hands. A gasp emitted from you as the glint of the gold page edges caught the light. It was the most special and thoughtful gift you’d ever received, and, you thought, far more precious than any of the books that surrounded you in the royal library. You found yourself so touched that you wanted to cry, but you fought back the tears as you looked up at your friend.

The prince looked twice as happy as you felt. His eyes sparkled despite the soft lighting, and his cheeks had taken on a slightly bashful pink. “So you can finish it,” he told you softly. “And read it over and over again, any time you want.”

You were still speechless, and you could feel the hot prickle of tears threatening to build. Before you knew it, you had thrown your arms around his neck, his arms closing around your back. Never did you imagine anything like this. You were stretched up on your toes, and you were sure he was leaning down to hug you, but you were too wrapped up in the moment to think about any of it. It felt like you were holding on to each other a long time before you finally parted. The urge to kiss his cheek filled you as you brushed away from him, but you thought better of it. The last thing you wanted was for him to feel as though you were jumping to conclusions that were presumptuous.

“I don’t have anything to give you,” you fretted. The weight of the book in your hands made you feel unexpectedly empty-handed.

Beomgyu chuckled. “It’s a ‘good luck’ present. Except I know you won’t need luck.”

“Thank you, Beomgyu.” His smile somehow grew at your use of his name. You knew you had his smile etched into your memory already.

“You’ll have to tell me how it ends,” he said as the two of you made your way slowly down the stairs. It was the first time he’d walked you out, and you were too intent on borrowing more time with him to worry much about being seen together when you reached the grand hall.

“No, I won’t,” you retorted with a laugh, looking up at him as you both dragged out each next step as subtly as possible. “You have your own copy here,”

Beomgyu pondered this for a moment, lips pursing, before formulating his reply. His eyes were determined as they met yours again. “Well, we’ll have to discuss our opinions on the ending.”

Neither of you took notice of the way the heads turned and followed the two of you as you crossed the hall. It was mostly palace staff at this time of evening. With the book clutched to your chest, they could only gather that this was the spark that had ignited Prince Beomgyu’s sudden penchant for reading. Many silent smiles were exchanged across the room as you passed.

“You will come if I invite you, won’t you?” Bromgyu asked on the front steps. His face was earnest, maybe the most you’d ever seen. “When you have time out from school?”

“Of course,” you replied, meaning it with all the hope in your heart. “But I haven’t gotten the scholarship yet.” You felt cause to keep reminding him.

“As well as I know how often you could come to visit if you didn’t get it, I know you will. I have no doubt.”

You looked up to see the genuine look in his eyes, sincerity doing little to conceal the sadness. “We’ll see each other again.” The words felt like truth as you spoke them. “And in the meantime, we can write.” Beomgyu nodded eagerly.

Disappointment tugged at you when you spotted your family’s carriage roll up through the gates. With a small bow and one last smile, you stepped into the vehicle, still clutching Beomgyu’s gift. You kept your eyes on him as the horses walked on, watched him wave until he was out of sight. There was a renewed heaviness about you as you sat back and settled in for the journey home. Even the first stars beginning to emerge from the darkening sky couldn’t comfort you as you gazed out of the window solemnly.

***

Prince Beomgyu tried his best, rather unsuccessfully, to stifle yet another yawn. He’d stayed up too late reading, and now he was sitting in the grand hall trying to go over his upcoming speech with bleary eyes. He hadn’t intended to go to bed quite so late, but each time he’d told himself he’d close the book at the end of the chapter, he hadn’t been able to. The closer he’d gotten to the end of the story, the more gripped by it he’d become and the faster his eyes seemed capable of taking in the words. He’d read until he’d finished the book, then sat in stunned silence. He couldn’t help but wonder if you’d finished the book yourself, and he’d had the strong urge to start a letter. Instead, his good sense had taken him to bed, where he’d remembered the speech he should have spent the night memorising. The book had been a satisfying distraction. Without it he likely would have tossed and turned the whole night in anticipation of giving his speech.

Beomgyu was still new to public speaking and was not fond of it. As the hour grew closer, he found himself stumbling over his words as he practised. He could feel his heart rate increase, seemingly with each tick of the loud ornate clock across from him and every sound that carried into the hall from the room full of people he was to address.

Getting to his feet, he began to move about the room in an effort to soothe himself. His thoughts attempted to reassure him. He knew what was expected of him. He knew, for the most part, what he was to say. But then the image of hundreds of pairs of eyes all fixed on him crept into his mind, sending a chill down his back. As he passed the clock, he felt it was taunting him — it seemed the minutes were passing faster than they should. He could almost feel the second hand’s torturous chanting inside his chest from this proximity. With a shaky sigh he turned to cross the room away from it again, fiddling with the golden buttons on his jacket cuff which he had already fastened and unfastened more times than he could count in his nervous state.

Through the open doors across the hall he could hear the familiar sound of a carriage arriving out front. Beomgyu allowed himself to imagine it had come to rescue him. He had the urge to go and greet it, just to give him a brief distraction, but the clock stared him down, boasting a mere five minutes remaining until he must speak in front of the crowd. Reaching for the small paper in his pocket, he made to sit once more and make himself concentrate on revising the words, until a voice called his title. He jumped back to his feet in panic, fearing they had come to usher him in early, but as he turned to the door beside him that led to the luncheon, he found no one. Instantly some of the tension in his raised shoulders fell away.

“Beomgyu!”

His heart skipped over one beat as he spun toward the entrance and saw a figure in a half mannerly run. Disbelief flickered in his mind at the sight of you, the first in weeks, but his body suddenly felt lighter than it had all day. You were rushing toward him, an unmistakable grin on your face, footsteps muffled by the thick ancient rug that carpeted the tiled floors.

Beomgyu stepped away from his seat with only seconds to spare, his face still one of bewilderment as you threw your arms around him, almost knocking the prince off his feet. His heart was thudding rapidly in his chest, but now it had nothing to do with nerves. His arms went around you instinctively as you met chest to chest, and in his excitement he brought you up onto your toes with his hug. Your laugh in his ear was like a familiar tune from a yesterday he’d longed to return to.

You pulled back to see his face, speaking first as you saw a question forming in his mind. “I got it! The scholarship – I got it!” you exclaimed.

The sun seemed to dawn on Beomgyu’s face, along with something that looked proud. “Of course you did! What did I tell you?”

His arms had relaxed around you to let you draw back, and now you glanced down at the placement of your hands on his shoulders, looking a touch shy in your realisation. His smile grew at this.

“You worked so hard.” He spoke more softly than a moment ago. His heart didn’t seem to settle as the two of you untangled from each other. He had half a thought to check on the time before another thought replaced it. “I finished the book last night.”

Your smile turned fond. He’d missed you more than he’d thought he had, which was hard to imagine. “I finished it the night you gave it to me,” you admitted with a small laugh. “Did you like how the story ends?”

Beomgyu reached a hand out toward yours in a small movement, his skin tingling at the feel of your warm fingers as you allowed your own to close around his. It was the second time he’d touched your hand, and this time he could hold it longer. “Yes,” he replied as he felt his smile widen. Your eyes met his again with a new shine. “I liked the ending very much.”

The clock chimed across the hall, announcing the hour and reminding him of his impending task. The door opened and his advisor appeared. If he was surprised to find the prince with company, he didn’t show it. The man simply smiled and nodded his head respectfully. “They’re ready for you, Your Highness.” Then he disappeared back inside.

Beomgyu took a deep breath. He found that he wasn’t as anxious as he had been before. There was still a lingering nervousness, but it had been softened by another feeling. Even the wall of sound that was just beyond the door seemed to have dulled at the back of his mind. He looked at you and you nodded towards the open door.

“My parents are inside. I used them as my excuse to come here.” He caught your clever smile, then felt your hand on his shoulder, and before he knew it you’d raised up onto your toes and your lips brushed his cheek. It was the kiss you’d held back before. “Good luck. But I know you won’t need it,” you said, slipping away through the door before he could react to the tingle on his face.

The prince’s mind was pleasantly blank as he faced the door and the duty ahead of him. It seemed his nerves had been replaced by a buzzing sensation that felt rather like courage, matching the tingling trace of your kiss on his face. Equipped with a smile, he stepped into the room feeling like he was about to give his best speech yet.

[terresdebrume]

People have expressed interest and my brain is desperate for a reason to procrastinate on the couch so there we go

"So what do I call you?" Crystal asks ot the end of her first day with the men who were hired to kill her.

She doesn't remember a lot from before they exorcised the demon who'd taken over her, and nothing from before that happened. She thinks there was thievery involved, hopefully the non violent kind, but it's all too blurry to tell. Like she'd been possessed by a shy demon, somehow.

"You heard our name," the wizard says.

He sounds as prickly as he did when Crystal first woke up, vaguely grateful to remember at least her name. Irritatingly straight backed, tightly wrapped into greenish-gray wizard robes with a high collar, gloved hands pressed together into fists. Crystal would have an easier time forgiving him all that if he hadn't told his colleague that he wasn't allowed to keep her, like she's a stray dog or something.

"I'm not going to call you 'Mr. Payne' forever," Crystal protests.

"Of course not," Mr. Payne replies, sounding scandalized. "You'll be gone long before then."

"Well, we can't really know that for sure, can we Mr. Payne?" Says Mr. Rowland.

Crystal can't quite tell if he's a soldier or a thief or some combination of the two. He's wearing maroon leather armor over a vivid red shirt that might have cost a little fortune to dye. He's lounging around the campfire, opposite Mr. Pain, and using one of his numerous daggers to whittle what looks like a little bear out of pale wood.

His hands pause in their movement when he turns to look at Crystal, pointing at her with the tip of the dagger:

"You sound nothing like the people for around here, for one," he says. "You clothes are completely wrong for the season, and we haven't heard anything about a girl going missing."

"Where is here, anyway?" Crystal asks, past the knot clawing at her throat. "Because it fucking sucks."

Mr. Payne clicks his tongue and rolls his eyes at the proclamation, but Mr. Rowland only chuckles. Crystal is right, anyway. There's nothing around but grass, grass and more grass, the occasional gaggle of sheep, and a forest on the horizon that's been covered in mist the whole day through.

"This," Mr. Payne says primly, "is the north of Hilarion. The nearest village about three days to the south of where we are, by foot, and if the environment is not to your convenience, you are very welcome to find transportation to wherever you came from by yourself."

"Easy, Mr. Payne. She's just a girl."

Mr. Payne shuts up, visibly irritated.

"Right," he says, brusquely getting to his feet. "I suppose it is time to bring out the agency. If you please."

He extends a hand, and Crystal watches Mr. Rowland hand him a piece of string, a fork, some fleece, and a pinch of lavender which Mr. Payne clicks his tongue at and immediately discards. Then he steps away from the fire, and starts drawing runes in the dirt.

"Don't mind him too much," Mr. Rowland says. "He's a good sort of chap. He's just not so good at showing it."

Crystal stares at him, skeptical, and he smiles. It doesn't last long, though: eventually, his face sobers up and his voice lowers as he adds:

"Besides, your case is turning rather more complicated than we expected it to be. That you aren't from here is one thing, demons rarely stay in place once they possessed someone... But the man who hired us specifically asked for you to be put down. Now we have to figure out how aware he was of your situation. If he knew, then the whole thing goes from a muck up to a potential assassination with us as its instrument, and that changes things."

"How?" Crystal asks, mostly so she doesn't have to think about the fact that someone might genuinely have wanted her dead.

"For one, it might force us to engage with law enforcement," Mr. Payne calls out over his shoulder. "Something we generally avoid."

He stands up again, wiping his hands, and Crystal notices the square wooden door standing behind him, where there was only empty air before.

"Come on," Mr. Rowland says, getting to his feet in one impossibly fluid motion, "let's have this conversation inside."

[ineffable-endearments]

Mort by Terry Pratchett

According to his response to an ask on Tumblr, one of Neil's favorite books by Terry is Thief of Time. It's the last in the Death series, and the Death series is one of my favorites, so I'm reading/rereading all of them in order, starting with Mort, which was originally published in 1987. A year before I even existed. Three years before Good Omens was published.

Here are some vague thoughts.

A tiny note: while I enjoy the central premise of Mort a great deal, it's got some humor based in racial stereotyping (think Klatchians speaking in overly formal terms and discussing "honor" in a way used to stereotype Eastern cultures on Earth). Fortunately, none of it matters to the plot, but if you find stereotypes frustrating or triggering, you should know they're in the book.

Super simplified summary with spoilers:

Mort is an awkward, thoughtful young man who can't seem to find anywhere to belong in his own community. However, Death decides he wants an apprentice and chooses Mort. Mort meets Ysabell, Death's adopted daughter, instantly disliking her just as she dislikes him. Mort also meets Albert, Death's mysterious servant. Death leaves Mort with the reaping duties while Death curiously explores what human lives and pleasure are about and reveals himself to be rather lonely.

At one point, Mort finds out that Ysabell has been reading people's life stories in Death's domain and leaving their books out when she isn't supposed to; however, realizing this is a sensitive issue for Ysabell, he conceals this fact and takes the blame for it instead, which endears him to her. It turns out Ysabell has been reading about young women's lives on the Disc because she doesn't get to have a proper social life here in Death's domain.

While on the job as the Reaper, Mort tries to save a princess named Keli, whom he is attracted to, when he discovers that she is about to die; he chooses to reap the soul of her assassin instead. But because Keli's death has already been fated, her survival leads to an awkward alternate reality situation, which can only last so long before she dies anyway. Mort and Ysabell frantically attempt to find a way to save the princess for real. During this adventure, Mort bonds with Ysabell, and Keli bonds with a wizard, Cutwell, whom she has enlisted to try to help her be crowned before her imminent death. Most of all, Keli does not want to die without being officially crowned queen. Meanwhile, Mort is slowly being taken over by a part of Death and risks losing himself.

Mort also discovers that Albert is an extremely old wizard who has stayed close to Death as a servant in an attempt to avoid actually dying. While Mort is trying to save Keli, Albert in fact betrays Death, getting a bunch of Unseen University wizards to try to summon and bind Death as an attempt for Albert to escape his servitude and live on the Disc again. However, the summoning just brings Death back to himself after his adventures in human society (he's not happy about this). It also restores Mort to normal, as it summons the portion of Death that was taking over Mort, too. The Unseen University's Librarian keeps Albert from escaping and Death takes him up as a servant once again, seemingly oblivious to Albert's betrayal.

Eventually, it is too late; Keli isn't crowned as queen, reality closes in on them, and they all end up back in Death's realm, facing a Death who has learned about Mort's attempt to tamper with fate and is very angry. They have a duel, and Death wins. However, when Mort points out that he actually understands now what it's like to be Death, Death decides to ask the gods to change fate, so that Mort and the princess both survive. Ysabell has fallen in love with Mort, and he in turn falls in love with her, and they get married. Although wizards can't formally get married, Keli and Cutwell also get together, with Cutwell as "Master of the Queen's Bedchamber."

Themes:

Here are some interesting themes in Mort, each of which charmed me and reminded me a bit of Good Omens in one way or another. Some of them are reminiscent because of their similarities, and some of them are reminiscent because of their stark differences, but they're all fun and interesting.

An immortal being who exists on a scale that is incomprehensible to us humans (that's Death) becomes fascinated by mortal life. He tries a lot of things before discovering that he really loves being a cook at a restaurant.

This immortal being, though well-intended, exerts control over mortal lives in a way that isn't fair or healthy; in the end, though, he puts it right.

"True love" is unexpected and quiet and most of the intimate moments are left to imagination. And yet, by the end of the story, that love is also undeniable.

We've got a situation where a human is trying to take on a cosmic role, and the role starts instead to take over him; the more of Death's job Mort does, the more he begins to embody Death. Ultimately, Mort doesn't triumph over or control this - the Death aspect is removed from him by Albert's summoning spell. Meanwhile, the more Death lives as a human, the more human-like he becomes.

Our immortal being puts in a good word with the gods for our mortal protagonists and succeeds in changing their fates.

Death's loneliness is a recurring issue that comes up. It seems like one of the things that makes him fascinated by humans is their social lives, which he tries to emulate. The moment that seems to push Death to ask the gods for a reprieve for the mortals is Mort pointing out that he may in fact understand how Death feels about reaping.

With that said, the characters' motivations are allowed to drive the story without always being bluntly stated. You can see them, clear as daylight, outlined by the way they define the action, but just as real people don't stand around declaring their intentions, the characters don't say everything they're thinking and feeling. I think this is the standard in both Terry Pratchett's and Neil Gaiman's work, but I'm feeling compelled to mention it.

Ultimately, both Mort and Death are struggling with their "places" and feelings of loneliness. Spending time in each other's roles gives them much-needed perspective. This perspective does not cause them to leave their former roles on the Disc (human and anthropomorphic personification, respectively), but it helps rejuvenate their approaches.

Mort starts the book lonely and lacking in conviction; he figures he might as well become Death's apprentice because he has no other options. Through his adventures as Death's apprentice, Mort bonds with people who are every bit as lonely as he is and gains conviction about the kind of person he wants to be, making a place for himself on the Disc.

Meanwhile, Death starts the book curious about human pleasures, and just when he is beginning to understand them, he is torn away. As a result of this rude reminder that he's outside of human life, Death starts his final confrontation feeling rigid and insistent that fate is written and he must enforce it. It's the very moment Death realizes Mort, a human, might be able to understand him - he isn't completely alone - that he decides to go ahead and ask the gods to change Mort and his friends' fates. It's both understanding and feeling understood that make the difference.

Tying it back to Good Omens:

Naturally, Death of Discworld is an immortal fascinated by humanity, and so are Aziraphale and Crowley. That's a pretty core similarity. So, of all the differences between their places in their narratives, what are the most substantive?

I'd suspect that it is reasonable for Death to remain outside of human society because he represents a real force of nature, an essential part of the universe that life as we know it can't exist without. On the other hand, I think Aziraphale and Crowley have been given contrived jobs; I don't believe the core of the Good Omens narrative holds that it is necessary to split people into Sides, so it makes more sense for there to be upheaval in Heaven and Hell, and for Aziraphale and Crowley to choose not to do their jobs.

Those are my main thoughts for now. The two works really do share thoughtful themes of mortality and love, flavored, of course, with charming absurdity.

[purplebass]

A soft name but she uses it like a knife: an analysis of Lila's identities

Because I think about Lila so much and because I like to analyze names and symbolism so much... I realized something about her given names. I could write an essay about her multiple identities and Kell's but maybe in the future. Tes says that names are a valuable thing and people used personal names to curse those they disliked. Her birth name is Delilah which means "delicate". When Kell first meets her, he thinks that she has a soft name but she uses it like a knife, which is an accurate description of her character.

Only the people closest to her call her Lila, which is more informal. Lila Bard is a double faced matryoshka, we could say. There is one side she shows the people closest to her, which are few, and another side she only shows Kell. He's the only one who sees the tiniest doll in the heart of it all, and even so, there are still sides to her that he doesn't know. He's also the only character she openly told that it was fine to call her Lila after their first meeting.

According to other sources, Delilah could also be the epithet for "traitor" because in the Bible, Delilah cuts Samson's hair and he loses his strength (interesting fact that when Holland and part of Kell's magic end up in the inheritor, their hair turned white - could be inspired by this? Bets are on).

Delilah is also pronounced De-lie-la and I believe she is one of the characters who lies the most in this series and her pov is not 100% trustworthy (which I see as an amusing thing bc she is harder to figure out and it's fun when her lies are unmasked!). She introduces herself with her full name to everyone, but only few people keep calling her Delilah instead of Lila (among them Holland, Nadiya, and Ren). They aren't close, hence they don't dare to use her shortened name, I guess. It's also a way to distance themselves from her or to treat her with respect.

Delilah Bard is one of the identities she has, one she couldn't choose (because her parents gave her this name). Delilah Bard is the exterior, the person on the outside. Even when the text describes her and uses Delilah and not Lila, it's to paint a picture of her from an external point of view. We can explain who she is by thinking about a matryoshka doll: Delilah Bard is the bigger doll, the one everyone sees. Inside there are different sides to her: the magician, the thief, the captain, which have different names as well (the Sarows, the Shadow Thief, casero Bard, even Stasion Elsor).

Lila is the name she seems to prefer for herself, and the name which connects her to her magical part because one of the meaning of this name also refers to the lilac tree. When Lila calls her magic, mostly fire magic, she uses a line from Blake's poem: "Tyger, tyger, burning bright,". The "tiger lily" is also a species of lily flower. Her name Lila then encompasses her magical connection to Red London because it is connected to a flower. But it's yet another interesting connection to Kell because well, the tiger lily is orange-red with black spots. The tiger lily flower is also toxic for cats and we know that Esa doesn't seem to like Lila that much and the feeling is mutual. lol

If you want me to write about more of this stuff send me asks please 🥺

[justplainwhump]

Deal

Don't mind me, thinking about "voluntarily" acquisitions.

Content: BBU setting, blackmail, threat of deportation, abuse of office, implied dubcon.

The man sitting across from her in the tiny interrogation room frowns at her, a look filled with grave seriosity. It's ridiculous. The only reason that Morva doesn't break into laughter is that she's a better actor than him. She is, in fact, fantastic.

It's not her skill who has brought them here; it's fucking Eddie's failure. It's not the first time she needs to get out of somebody else's mess. Morva will manage. She always does.

And step one is, do not laugh in the face of a small officer in a too large suit, who pretends to give a shit.

"I've looked into your files, Ms Gholamali. It doesn't look good."

She raises an eyebrow, a hint of amusement that she doesn't feel. He's not supposed to know that name. "I am sorry," she says. "There must be a mix up. My name is Mary Ann Ellis. I'm American."

"No, you're not." There's a smugness in his smile, and this time, he's dropped the act.

Well. Fuck.

"Morvarid Gholamali. It was your birthday yesterday. 20 years old. Quite the impressive criminal record, given how short you've been in the US. Illegally."

She doesn't flinch. Just tiredly rolls her eyes and lifts her cuffed hands. "Sir," she says with a bored voice. "That's ridiculous. I'm from Maine. I don't even know how to pronounce that name you just said. Where is it even from?"

"Iran." The man gives a thin lipped smile. "You'll hear the proper pronounciation of that name soon enough. Regardless of what you say, paperwork is being processed right now. You'll be deported."

"I don't-"

"Ms Gholamali", he interrupts her.

"Ms Ellis," she corrects automatically. His Persian proununciation is a nightmare. Still, she'll prefer hearing it from him than from an Iranian border officer. Fuck. This is taking a turn she does not appreciate.

The man goes on, unimpressed. "You're a criminal. A plain boring little thief. I bet you call yourself con artist, somewhere in your head, because you fucked your victims before robbing them, but you're not special in any way. You're a criminal, you're an illegal immigrant, and we don't want you here."

Behind her fake, confused smile, Morva grits her teeth. That asshole didn't talk about the fucking part by chance, she's sure of it. Her toolbox is a lot larger than that. If he mentions sex, he wants to get somewhere with it.

Fine. She's fucked men for way less than her own fucking chance at freedom.

"I'm American," she insists, still. "You can't deport me."

"You know.... An American would have other options," he says slowly. Almost thoughtful. Almost like he didn't plan this thing from the fucking start. "Do you know WRU?"

This does catch her off guard. "WRU? The... The pet distributors?"

"They have a program for people facing jail time to sign up, as part of their sentence." The man smiles. She hates that for a second, she doesn't even want to punch him. She wants to hear him out. He nods. "They could stay here, be reeducated, do a service to society again, in a way. Get assigned an owner, live with them, be-"

"Be a pet."

"Be in America."

She swallows, as he holds her gaze and goes on talking.

"So... Hypothetically. If I were to believe you, disregard all the talk about Ms Gholamali - would the American national Ms Mary Ann Ellis take this option?"

Her mind is racing. It can't be that bad now, can it?

She's been acting all her life, she's degraded herself so often to play a role, seduced men to get into their homes and wallets. She could become a pet, sure. She'd find a way to get out of it on the other side. She could, here. She couldn't, back home.

"Ms Ellis would certainly consider it," Morva says softly, looking down at her handcuffs and back at him through her lashes. "If only you were to believe her identity."

He smirks and raises an eyebrow, gaze wandering down her body slowly. "Interesting."

It's almost a relief. This is something she understands. A game she's played hundreds of times. Never as desperate. But always successful.

She can do this.

"Is... Is there something I could do to convince you?" She bites her lip. "Sir?"

"You know what?" He chuckles and leans in, loosens his tie with his free hand. "I think there is."

[dragon-swords-prophecies]

Writeblr Re-Intro, 4th Edition

Hi! I'm copper or dragon or whatever else you wanna call me. Minor, he/him preferred but they/them also works. My main is @copper-dragon-in-disguise. I'm queer & neurodivergent.

Asks and messages welcome! I might take a while to respond to them but I like them. I mostly write fantasy, and my current main WIP is a steampunk fantasy murder mystery called Herald At Dawn. I also have a few back burner WIPs, which are all below the cut. (also, these all have taglists, if you're interested i can add you to them!)

Post subject to updates at any time.

My WIPs:

Herald At Dawn (#wip: herald at dawn)

Synopsis: 11 years ago a woman named Marisol Ekker was murdered by the wife of her son's father, Evelyn Belmont. Despite evidence to the contrary, Evelyn Belmont was acquitted, and faced no punishment. Nearly a decade later, investigative reporter Alexandrina McLelland approached Marisol Ekker's son, Nathaniel--who was 12 at the time of her death--, to write an article about the corruption present in the case. Shortly after the article is published a string of murders begins, with no seeming rhyme or reason to connect the victims. But the timing seem suspect, and as the fallout of the articles publishing hits Nathaniel, more and more people keep dying, until the killer targets somebody much closer to home than Alex would've ever guessed.

Herald At Dawn was originally done for NaNo 2023 (I did a half nano, 25k not 50k), and its a steampunk murder mystery with a dash of fantasy. Set in a city called Volimere, it tells the story of the staff of a newspaper called The Clockwork Herald, and their adventures with a murder. The main POV character is Alexandrina McLelland (she/her), an investigative reporter. It's gay as fuck and also the first in what I intend to be a series!

Backburner WIPs:

Some context: The first three are all inspired by dnd characters/campaigns, and are in the same world/universe. The fourth is also in the same universe & dnd inspired, but it doesn't have a specific character attached to it.

Frost & Fire (#wip: frost & fire)

Synoposis: The death of an ancient primordial dragon brings the greatest (if not that well known) adventurers of the last centuries together. Enna Helder-Kromlin, half-Elf thief and contractor for the crown of Halmond, along with her sister, Anne, leader of the thieves guild Oleski. Anastrannia & Redari Galendel, twin half-Frost Dragon, half-Elves, one a shadow ranger and one a shadow sorcerer. They must work together, if not get along, to stop a evil dragon named Dizerdrat from trying to claim the power released by the death for himself, because if he does his could conquer the world—and would.

Frost & Fire is my original WIP, and I need to rework the plot a lot, but I still quite like it. Its about two twin half-elves named Anne (she/they) and Enna (any pronouns) Helder-Kromlin , and their efforts to stop a dragon from using magic (that he got from killing another, different dragon who was as old as time, pretty much) to conquer the world (this one particular continent, but despite the fact that they're spectacularly well traveled for half-elf orphans neither of them have ever actually left the continent, so its the world to them). Along the way they meet Anastrannia (she/they/ze) and Redari (they/he) Galendel, two siblings who have a lot of secrets and know a suspicious amount about dragons. This has a wip intro, though it isn't super current, but I'm linking it anyway.

One of Copper (#wip: one of copper)

Synopsis: The current god of death, Illa, came to power during a war between the gods a thousand years ago. A wizard is now trying to start another one, aiming to kill a god and take their place. Illa does not want to see another celestial war. She has no direct influence on the mortal plane, however, and so she outsources the quest to a ragtag group of heroes, when the original group of heroes sends back a memo saying that they're retired, and she can come down herself and make them go herself if she's so insistent.

One of Copper is about a bard named Kairon (he/they) and his friends, Ash (she/her, 60-something blacksmith), Joshua (he/him, quarter-elf fighter with minor nature magic and a massive crush), and Elas (they/them, elf sorcerer who is mildly (read: Very) cursed) & their adventures. Originally this was gonna be high fantasy, then it was gonna be lighthearted high fantasy, and now its gone in the exact opposite direction into high fantasy except much sadder than the original. Its about Death trying to stop a war between the gods that a wizard is trying to start, because the wizard wants to become one. (the goddess of death is called Illa. she's inspired by the Raven Queen in d&d).

UNNAMED, aka Enna's Prequel (PREV: Angel's Daughters) (#wip: ennas prequel)

By the time they were 19 years old, Enna and Anne Helder-Kromlin had been accused of murder once, imprisoned at least three times, and orphaned twice. By the time they were forty, those numbers would be changed to six, fourteen, and one, respectively. They had only ever actually committed four of the murders they were accused of, as Enna liked to remind people. Unfortunately, they had also been the targets of a blood feud, gotten kidnapped then almost killed by a necromancer, and twice had to go into hiding.

This is the backstory of Anne and Enna. Its set approx. 10-20 years before Frost & Fire, and it shows how they ended up where they are now, and their adventures. This is directly based off the original d&d campaign I played with Enna as my PC, and the main plot elements are a necromancer named Eleanor, a murdered brother, blood feuds (of a sort), and various other things. This is unnamed. It was previously called Angel's Daughters, but that rather spoiled the ending.

Silence and Secondhand Souls (#wip: silence and secondhand souls)

Fate is an interesting thing. Some doubt it even exists. Not me. Not anymore. Souls don’t rest until they’ve told their story, and I’ve got a long way to go yet. My friends are dead and so am I, haunting a narrative I never got a choice in. How exactly did that happen, you ask? Let me start at the beginning. Or the end, rather. I died when I was 21 years old.

Silence and Secondhand Souls is a first person POV story, narrated by Alexandra Rovenowa. She is dead. This is the story of how she died, set seventy years or so before Frost & Fire. It is also the story of how history likes to repeat itself, and how sending kids on quests for the sake of the world is bad, and of a kind Death, despite it all. (This is my most dramatic wip. Its a tragedy, and I really, really like it.) This does not have a current wip intro.

[queenofsliferred]

*crashes through the ceiling* Hello, hello ~💜

So, not an ask game question, I'm just curious af. Would you mind telling me more about Sora Kurohoshi? And Rin Amamiya? And Dolores "Lolita"? And Jeff the Pom?

Also, how do Kitana Garrison and Nerissa look like? (description, picrew, whatever you prefer!)

hewwo!!

sora was originally made for a death note RP forum that i made with my friends. she was really egotistical and was the catalyst for one of the "big events" of the thing. she at first killed a bully of hers then went on to kill her family to get more attention from kira. she threatened to kill her cousin who was testifying against her and smuggle in a weapon to her court case then she would somehow steal it and then cause an even bigger scene that kira just couldn't ignore. she really wanted to die by kira but light winds up having her kill herself by using the death note (like writing in the fact that she commits suicide, not like giving her the note and then lol.)

i used this anime girl as a face claim. you just dont see anime girl pics like this anymore :')

Rin Amamiya is basically a female version of Joker Persona 5. i got super attached to her as i fleshed her out and wrote more about her. i rp as her a lot on a ERP site and have done crossover stuff which led to her MHA AU counterpart.

MHA!Rin is a petty criminal. she isn't super serious about actually committing crimes and is lowkey kind of a coward despite the showiness of her heists and costumes (which is a revealing leotard). like the traditional phantom thief, she sends a letter announcing that she is going to steal X thing and that the police better catch her and stop her. i personally think that she does all this for attention because she's so unassuming and considered really plain outside of the Joker persona.

she has beef with Neito because she couldn't use the name Phantom Thief due to him. the two butt heads a lot because he always wound up having to chase her and stuff when he was on his internship.

(art by nemirutami)

Dolores (though she wants you to call her Lolita-chan! its totally more cute that way!) is a trainer born in Paldea but had to move to Galar for most of her life. she has a huge fangirl crush on Raihan (and Bede when he becomes a gym leader) due to his amazing charisma and impeccable social media prescence. he inspires her to try to become a champion and idol as well. she has a HUGE fascination with sinnohian and hoennian culture, finding them really cute and aesthetically pleasing plus the animation that comes from there is really cool.

she has a tendency to get new crushes ALL THE TIME even if she's in a relationship atm. her girlfriend goes to another school (naranja while she is an uva student). you don't know her. (the girlfriend is real and is named maria, she belongs to my partner). her biggest crush is probably professor jacq, her biology teacher, but she doesn't pursue it.

jeff the pom isn't the most fleshed out tbh. he be my dog, jeff who is a pommeranian, but as a sonic character. i imagine him being a 'speed' type character in a sonic heroes setting. he's a doofus who wears his heart on his sleeve and sleeps all the time.

i dont have a ref image for him yet sadly gshfhgsdfh

when i originally made kitana, i used this anime girl as a face claim.

i eventually drew her in 2014 and lol its kinda rough to look at.

nerissa looks like this!

on the left is her current design and the right is her old design.

thanks for the questions!

[schattenschreiberin]

In the past I've been confronted with many a-holes, thiefs, even pedophiles and it really made me hate the internet for allowing many of those people to carry on without consequences.

But this current situation perfectly shows how the internet can enforce consequences.

Iilluminaughtii has been forced out of silence because her subscribers are getting tired of asking her for a statement and to take accountability, after she just carried on as if she hadn't attempted to ruin lifes and careers and shown someones su1c1de note in her video.

Her views are dropping, her current collab-podcast cut ties with her and even sponsors are dropping her.

And then she faces more consequences after posting an empty statement about false allegations not silencing her, while sending cease and desist letters to Wonderstruck. OzMedia says she's threatening him with a SLAPP suit, which essentially means "Shut up or I'll sue you and bleed you dry with all the lawyer costs". And her statement really reads like "I'm taking legal action against people who dared defend themselves against my allegations".

The internets response to her threatening to financially cripple a man who's mental health she tried to weaponize against him?

If you threaten to ruin this mans life just because your ego is too big to take accountability for your own actions and bullying him specifically is your answer to his mountain of evidence against you, I'll gladly help him defend himself.

I hope he doesn't need it, and if he doesn't all the money goes to the Trevor project.

I don't see me loosing anything, I only gain the fact of either helping a great cause for a whole bunch of people or helping make one of the greatest bullies with the worst behaviour I've ever seen face consequences.

I hope instead of suing people she uses the money to get therapy.

Seriously, Blair, go to therapy.

[merge-conflict]

Five Facts about Valentine

A little late to the game, but better than never!

Basic facts

Legal Name: Valentina Myśliwiec

Gender: Thief**

Age: Early 30s

Background: Corpo -> Arasaka CounterIntel by way of NetOps

Five Facts

Valentine has a moderate case of aphantasia, which means she can't meaningfully form images in her head. This doesn't bother her at all, and she's happy with a very kinesthetic view on the world, especially since her tolerance for audiovisual stimulation can be low. She relies a lot on network proprioception, which is a sort of shorthand for a function of her interface which allows her to sense the radio spectrum and by extension most wireless and peer to peer connections (like network access points or people's interfaces), both in a spatial sense and as a sort of texture or pulse. She finds areas without densely packed comms (i.e. the Badlands) uncomfortable because she feels half-blind and exposed. She has an ever-evolving set of scripts and software that she relies on day to day as well, including the one that tracks faces and interfaces so she never has to worry about remembering anyone's name. When she was at Arasaka she was one of the senior members of a technical group that developed tweaks and helpers for employee interfaces.

One man's trash is another man's treasure, and Valentine has a weak spot for discarded electronics. A vice she inherited from her techie mother, she has always picked up old equipment and squirreled it away with a list of possible uses she almost never gets around to. Flipping or repurposing it was always a valuable side hustle for them, since as a midrange network tech her mother wasn't exactly bringing in Glen money.

A self-proclaimed tactile learner, Valentine's default mode of communication is physical contact. This not being an encouraged practice within Arasaka she's pretty good at restraining herself, but it will come out if she's around someone who reciprocates. If she gets drunk she is prone to gently cupping people's faces and telling them how beautiful they are. She's at her happiest when she is comfortably squished in with at least one other person.

Though she likes to pride herself on not being taken in by any bullshit she has a profound weakness for women with authority. In the presence of such queens it's a real struggle for her to keep her dignity intact while simultaneously trying to impress them with increasingly unhinged and involved acts of devotion. Thankfully, her instinct to distance herself from Johnny's bullshit overrides this impulse, so she can still function when talking to Alt and Rogue. In her mind they're in some special "Johnny's Grumpiest Defense Squad" category which makes them ineligible for fan worship.

Finally, Valentine is an incorrigible bully. She's naturally 6' and until she was in her middle teens she was always one of the largest kids in her grade. It was her unmitigated pleasure to use this to keep anyone beneath her in the pecking order in line. Shortly after meeting Jackie when she was about fourteen, he kicked her ass a few times and she realized she was going to need to have something more than a smart mouth and a few extra inches of leverage to keep it up unless she started working out. So she gave it up and focused on her tech work. Her gut response to arguments is still usually to hit first and ask questions later, but she's worked very hard to keep that temptation suppressed.

** in Valentine's mind, gender is more of an occupation descriptor than anything else, and during the time period of canonical game events "thief" seems the most flattering of those available to her

[falling-through-the-sea]

Random facts about my WoF OCs because I want to do something instead of sleeping bcs it's full moon (it's 2¹⁴ and I haven't gone to sleep before 3am for past fortnight) ((I'm pulling Icicle))

- There are four protagonists, but only one male - a Sandwing Gerbil. In some old versions there were even eight females in the gang and then only him. I probably did it like this subconciously because in those times my friendgroup had only 1 boy for 7 girls XD

- Other than that, we have a Skywing Reddish, Icewing Avalanche and Seawing Depths.

- Avalanche spent all her life training in army and then becoming a fearless deadly soldier (and also one's leader deputy). She's incredibly powerful and weirdly good at stealth and assasin-like work. I, as well as others, assume it's because of her personality. All she did was train to fight in the Icewing kingdom and guard the lands with her squad, often getting into quarrels with sandwings or other dragons trying to traspass to their territory.

- She is very artistic-coded, as well as the rest of the squad - expect for Reddish, an ADHD epitome and a menace, and Depths, being made into that one neurotypical of the group who doesn't get them at all - often way dumber, blunter and duller than the autistics of the group, in the end.

After all, it's Depths.

- Reddish has PTSD from when she fled the palace she grew in. It was in a hurry and she still feels like she did something horribly wrong every time she recalls it.

- Gerbil can play drums and ukulele. He had basically the Rapunzel childhood, expect he was in charge from young age and was able to go outside, there just wasn't anything interesting - just sand, and as a true introvert, Gerbil quickly learned he'd rather spent time alone, sightseeing, stargazing or reading - forming his love for scrolls.

- he tried to draw, but can't do that very well.

- his nanny left him when he was four, because she didn't then being left in his castle only with men. Weirdly, he still kept his srereotypical girlish-ness even after and through that.

- Reddish can read! Gerbil can, too. (Obviously.) Avalanche can read only a Icewing code used for army messages, and another Icewing code she had to read orders from, but she doesn't know the common Pyrrhia alphabet.

- Depths can read too, only the common alphabet, but only capital letters - or its equivalent for Pyrrhia latin.

- Gerbil would be 17 y.o. as a human, Avalanche cca 18, Reddish 16/17 and Depths 18. She's older than Avalanche, though.

- sometimes I write Jerboa instead of Gerbil. It's because it's the right translation of his name - I'm used to think about them in my native language - but I call him Gerbil instead because there already is Jerboa in canon.

- Reddish's brother was a firescales - they managed to throw him off a cliff after he hatched, though they spared her. She grew up weirdly strong for being non-firescales, though, realising she has to conpensate gor her lack of fire in battles and working hard to do so. She uses her small and sleek figurey sneaking on others most often - leading to her later lifestyle as a thief, which she did the most. She misses her mom, sometimes, but not her childhood at all. She doesn't remember much of it, her early childhood is a haze, but she was told about it by her mother and later by her nannies when her mother left her in the Hatcher as most of Skywing parents do. (She wanted to keep her, though, for a moment feeling important because her daughter was unique, though then realising she'd probably never fight well and was embarrassing her in front of others - ...huge misconception. Too bad for her, now. Reddish doesn't remember anything except her gaze and face, though, and wven that could be made up, so she wouldn't probably recognise her if they ever met. Likewise for her mom, though the blue eyes might reveal it.)

- Reddish reacted to Raindrop - a hybrid - so bad because she dislikes her personality, not because she is a hybrid at all. She doesn't have then stigmatised at all, she never thought about what'd happen if two different tribes mixed much before, she just... Hates Raindrop in general. XD

(Reddish be like "I'm not homophobic! I hate everyone equally.")

- none of them have literally any stable and present relationship with her parents, and they just.. doesn't care.

[maxthornes]

I'm angry and ranting about my (hopefully) soon to not be roommate of a cousin in here. Don't read if you don't want to be mad.

I'm so fucking tired of my roommate being so inconsiderate. It's only gotten worse since she got a boyfriend.

We have 1 AC unit, and she has it in her room with the door constantly closed, TV blaring at any given hour.

She knows weed gives me panic attacks, but is still blasting the whole house with smoke every day.

She goes to the food pantry with the car she's borrowing from a friend, while DoorDash ordering name brand stuff from Target while crying woe about money and how she HAS to go to the pantry, meanwhile stealing mine and my fiancé's food we have to beg to use the car to pick up. (Which is a """"secret"""" to her friend that her bf and I have been driving it, even though said boyfriend has a car, and they always seem to take the friend's car RIGHT AFTER my fiancé and I have put gas into it)

Even though I'm queer and so is my mother, the bitch still LOVES Chick-fil-A and is constantly trying to get me to try it, and talking about how much she LOVED working there (even though she was quietly fired for celebrating my mom's wedding to her wife)

I constantly have to watch out for her dog and cats so they don't piss and shit over everything I own, and SPEAKING of the animals, I can't remember the last time she bought litter or cat food, nor the last time she cleaned a litter box (the cats are no longer ALLOWED upstairs by her order, and the litter box that WAS in the laundry room up here has no litter in it, but sure has piss and shit in it 😒) there are several cats in this house, more than half of which are hers, but she doesn't care for them.

She BROKE my toilet and shower head, but swears up and down that she doesn't know what happened, melted all of my makeup, lets her food rot in the fridge before bemoaning how she has "nothing" while the only reason my fiancé and I have had ANYTHING TO START WITH is that he works for a decent grocery chain.

Oh!

And she has been on "leave" with her job for 8 months, 6 of which were unpaid leave, because she lied to her job about taking care of her actually disabled father, and they only allow so much time of that to be paid. She recently started working again, and she's EVEN WORSE NOW and practically flaunting the fact that she has money back in our faces.

She fucked off to her boyfriend's house 2 hours away leaving us with no transportation during INSANE rain storms WITH NO WATER AND ALL OF THE ANIMALS TO TAKE CARE OF, and when she was like "oh, my dad should have covered that, oopsies" and admitted he had no money for the OVER $400 BILL, I went into debt to my mother to get the bill paid, and it's a MIRACLE she had the money to pay it. The water went unpaid the entirety of the first 3 months we lived her.

She also RECENTLY shoved a $150 internet bill AND $200 backed electricity bill onto my fiancé because she "didn't have money".

She's loud, inconsiderate, a liar, a thief, and I CANNOT WAIT to get the fuck out of here.

Fiancé and I lost our car in an accident I was involved in a year and a half ago, and it left me with an essentially disabled spine, so I LEGITIMATELY haven't been able to work, but I also can't get assistance because I'm waiting on the lawsuit to finalize (I'm not at fault, it was an international company's employee who caused the crash, and I've got a decent enough lawyer that I can get back into physical therapy AND get a car from the settlement, hopefully) and I have been advised by my attorney to not seek disability until after the payment, otherwise it could cause issues with getting government assistance, which I qualify for.

Anyway, hopefully in a month I'm across town, and she realizes she's on her own with ALL of the bills and the mortgage she was confident she could take over from her dad 😒😒😒 I'm so fucking done, and this isn't even scratching the surface of all the shit, and I WILL NOT be forgiving her for scamming my fiancé and I for the last two and a half fucking years.

I hope they serve Starbucks in Hell, you absolutely cunt.

[casspurrjoybell-17]

Hart and Hunter - Chapter 19 - Part 1

*Warning Adult Content*

Julian Hart

"Shoplifting?" I hear the growl in Dane's voice and gently touch his arm.

We're standing outside the station, where Chief Laura Coleridge had met us with Ingrid in tow.

The latter hugs herself and scowls at the ground and looks an awful lot like a kid in trouble. 

"Relax, Hunter," Chief Coleridge says.

"She won't be charged," her voice is almost as growly as his and I wonder if she might have been a smoker in her younger days.

"She should never have been arrested in the first place." 

"Then why are we here?" Dane asks.

"My sister's an adult and I'm not her guardian." 

Chief Coleridge gives him a hard-eyed stare that would make anyone else wither.

"Because of who's involved, of course." 

"The sister of a former officer?"

"Yes but more importantly, the sister of a friend."

"You mean...?" 

Dane clears his throat.

"I appreciate that, Laura but I'm not following you." 

She sighs, rubs the back of her neck, and glances at Ingrid.

"Will you tell him, or shall I?" 

"I was just shopping," Ingrid mutters.

"No lifting involved." 

Chief Coleridge waits for her to say more and when she doesn't, turns back to me and Dane. 

"According to Mrs. Ortiz, Ingrid spent about thirty minutes in her store. She showed no signs of making a purchase but took things off the shelves, put them back and appeared to be... 'sniffing the walls.' Understandably, Mrs. Ortiz was concerned." 

"Hang on."

Dane lifts a hand.

"'Ortiz,' as in Marta and Sergio Ortiz of Mountain Hardware and Gifts?" 

Chief Coleridge nods.

"The same and, given it's on the same street as Lagrange's shop and among the stores victimized by this... body-snatching thief or whatever we're going with now, I imagine Ingrid's motive was investigatory rather than criminal. I also imagine these investigations were not 'officially sanctioned' so to speak."

 She lifts a brow at Dane and he fixes Ingrid with a glare, which she misses because she's still studying the pavement at her feet. 

"Certainly not," Dane says. 

"I was just trying to help," Ingrid mutters and sniffs as she wipes her nose with the end of her sleeve. 

"Regardless, Marta and Sergio know me," Dane says.

"Why didn't you tell them who you are?" 

Finally, Ingrid looks up, tears sparkling in bloodshot eyes.

"I might've, if I'd had the chance." 

Dane looks at Chief Coleridge, brows lifted in question. 

She sets her hands on her hips and shifts her weight.

"Mrs. Ortiz did not, in fact, call the police. She was merely monitoring the situation when an off-duty officer happened to enter the store. She mentioned the situation to him and he took it on himself to confront and arrest your sister." 

"Without proof?" I ask, frowning as I glance between Coleridge and Dane.

"Is that legal?" 

Coleridge crosses her arms, looking uncharacteristically uncomfortable.

"Well, that's the thing. He says he saw her put something in her pocket..." 

"Which isn't true," Ingrid interjects. 

"And he had this as evidence of probable cause." 

She pulls a piece of folded paper from her pocket and hands it to Dane.

As he unfolds and peruses it, his expression darkens like the horizon before a storm. 

Ingrid begins to cry and covers her face with her hands.

"Please don't tell Mom and Dad." 

"What is it?" I ask, craning to read the paper. 

He hands it to me, describing the contents in a few terse words. 

"Arrest record. Dated last April. New York." 

A glance tells me it has Ingrid's name on it, along with a single charge. Shoplifting. 

"Here's the thing," Coleridge says.

"The officer in question pulled this record days ago... well before he should have had any reason to... which led me to suspect his presence in that store was not a coincidence. In fact, it suggests he may have been looking for just such an opportunity." 

Dane and I reach the same conclusion at the same time. 

"Erickson." 

Coleridge holds up a hand at whatever she sees on Dane's face and shakes her head. 

"He's received a warning and I'm considering formal action as well."

Dropping her hand, she sighs.

"Honestly, that bastard's been one false step away from dismissal for a while now. The problem is, when he pulls shit, he pulls it like this. I'd never have noticed if I hadn't been watching for it. That's why you're here. I wanted you to hear this directly from me... I want you to know I've got your back and that this won't happen again."

 This time, Dane makes no attempt to conceal his growl.

"Thanks, Chief," he says.

"And for Erickson's sake, it had better not." 

********

 "Shoplifting on a dare?" I ask, once we're all settled in Dane's car and headed home.

"Isn't that junior high level shit?" 

In the back seat, Ingrid sniffles.

She's huddled against the door and stares out the window, occasionally lifting a hand to swipe at stray tears. 

"I guess." 

I glance at Dane.

The layers of anger and disappointment he's working through are almost visible and while a large part of the anger is aimed at Erickson, Ingrid's not escaping unscathed.

"So, how'd it happen?" he asks.  

She huffs a sigh.

"You wouldn't understand." 

Dane's hands tighten on the wheel but when he speaks, there's no heat in his words. 

"I've been through careers in the military and law enforcement, Ingrid. I think I might understand peer pressure." 

Ingrid stays quiet and when I glance back, I see her shoulders shake with silent sobs.

I dig in the glove-box for the supply of paper napkins left over from various fast food stops and hand some back to her. 

She takes them and presses the whole wad to her face as she continues to cry.

"It was one mistake," she sniffs, her voice muffled by napkins.  

"Mistakes aren't deliberate," Dane says, a little of the growl returning to his voice.

"What you made was a bad decision... a choice you have to live with. We're both adults and I'm not gonna tell on you to Mom and Dad but while you're staying with us, you're at least somewhat my responsibility and I need to know what's what." 

Ingrid sniffles some more and takes a shaky breath but finally raises her head.

"There's... this group of girls," she begins, dabbing at her eyes with the damp napkins. 

I groan inwardly.

No good story begins with those words... in my experience, anyway. 

"They get all the good shit... all the best solos and the lead parts. If you're not in with them, you don't stand a chance. They make you do all this dumb shit to prove your worth or whatever but once you're in, you're in. They look out for their own. They were like... like..." 

"A sorority?" I suggest. 

"A Pack," Dane says, at almost the same time and Ingrid nods. 

"That's what it felt like, at first. It was hard being away from home, being the only Wolf. It was fucking lonely and... I just wanted to fit in somewhere." 

"So... the shoplifting dare was a hazing ritual or a loyalty test," I say. 

"Yeah, I guess." 

"Did you pass?" 

Ingrid turns back to the window as she mutters a quiet reply.

"Yeah. I passed." 

"You don't sound too happy about it," Dane comments. 

"No," Ingrid says, crumpling the ball of napkins in her fist.

"I knew it was wrong when I did it. That's why I got caught... I went back inside to pay for the shit. But I didn't rat on anyone else, so... I was in. Only..." 

"Don't tell me," Dane drawls.

"It wasn't all it was cracked up to be and getting in proved easier than getting out again." 

Ingrid hesitates, then nods.

"I thought the shoplifting was a one-off but the loyalty tests and shit didn't stop. I swear I never did anything like that again but... I was glad for the chance to get away from all that and come here." 

I look over at Dane, thinking that this story doesn't jibe with the bright picture she's painted of life at school so far but he seems satisfied for the moment. 

"As long as that's the truth, we're all good," he says.

"Mistake or bad decision, it sounds like you learned your lesson and we can leave it in the past, where it belongs." 

The mood lightens a little after that and Dane even stops for some burgers at Ingrid's favorite drive-through. 

Something bothers me, though, like a thread that keeps snagging but I take Dane's lead and let it lie.

[sacred-stanning]

Chapter 14 Part 5: Gotta Hurry

After appearing on the map, the first thing Rennac does is run up and open this chest.

If you remember, there is a locked door straight down from where the armor knights are, so to get to Rennac, we have to rush into the enemies a bit.

The group on the right is responsible for reaching Rennac. Ephraim can talk to him and recruit him, but there's a reason why I put L'Arachel in this right group...

And this is what the left group is dealing with.

Since I haven't promoted him yet, I wanted to get some more levels on Ross, so he has a solo mission to clear out these armor knights.

If I were smart, I would have given him a hammer, but I am not smart, so he just uses a killer axe instead.

Also, just a note, but all of the archers have long bows, so they have 2-3 range. This affects both the right and left groups since there are archers on both sides.

The game is also nice here and the middle armor knight in each group of three in front of each of the doors has a door key, so you don't need to think ahead and bring keys or a thief.

Moulder moves in first to start taking out the armors. He'll get attacked by the archer on enemy phase, but he'll be fine.

Franz and Vanessa deal with the reinforcements coming from the left.

Lute kills the middle armor, looks awesome while doing it, picks up the door key, AND gets to S rank for anima tomes!

Lute shakes her head as if to shake out the thoughts of her past that have surfaced, unwelcome and unasked for.

She sees herself as a child, imitating how a wyvern flaps its wings and screeches as it flies through the air. She had been playing in the sand on the edge of town with some other children. But after she pretends to be a wyvern, the two girls she had been playing with whisper something and walk away.

She remembers the town library, which doubled as a school, and the musty smell of the books there. The smell was one of her favorites, but she isn't enjoying it now. She looks out of the window and sees some of the other children who had been in school with her that day playing outside. She wants them to go home quickly because she has to get home soon or her parents will be mad, but she also knows from experience that if she steps outside while they're all there, they'll say something to her that she doesn't get and then they'll all start laughing at her. She feels a hot, unpleasant wetness starting at her eyes and running down her face. She's going to get home late, and then she's going to have to lie and tell her parents that she lost track of time while reading.

"This isn't the time for this," Lute thought. "I'm a mage. I'm the best mage in this army. They need me." She urges Vanessa forward--ugh, why did she name her horse Vanessa? Vanessa, the person, probably thinks she's weird for doing so. But how can she know what Vanessa is thinking?

But thinking about it, Vanessa named her wyvern "Lute". And Vanessa laughed when she heard that Lute's horse was named "Vanessa", and it wasn't like the laugh that the kids outside the library did. Lute could see Vanessa's laughing face in her mind as clearly as her hands on the reins...

...the reins! "I'm in battle!" she desperately yelled at herself in her mind.

"I need to stay focused."

On the right side, Ephraim and Marisa easily take care of the soldiers, and then Cormag flies in to start on the mercenaries.

I want to get the door open to get to Rennac, so Gerik and Tana move up to start attacking the armor knights. Tana stops short and attacks from 2 range so that the archers can't reach her.

...and then on enemy phase, I'm reminded of the fact that the bishop behind the left door has a sleep staff.

See that 27 hit it has on Moulder? Well, that actually hit! Whoops!

On the right side, Marisa gets the door key, Ephraim removes the last armor, and Gerik attacks the closer archer who came into 2 range since his buddy was already in the 3 range tile.

It turns out he throws his long bow over the wall with his dying breath. What a nice guy!

So this will be fun to play with! The long bow has kind of weak stats, but being able to attack from 3 range is a lot of fun. It's also only a D rank weapon, so Gerik can actually use it right away!

Next time: Staves are strong, and so are their users

[purplebass]

Kell the sea warrior: Kay the privateer

I was thinking about Kay Maresh, Kell's privateer identity that he took on after a few years of physical training on the Grey Barron. I wanted to see if the name was another spelling of the name Kai, and it turns out that it is. Depending on the roots, this name means "sea/ocean" or "shell" or even "warrior" and "to rejoice". All these meanings fit Kell's new identity on the ship, out to sea. And the name was chosen deliberately to represent all of his nuances as a character in this new journey. When he's Kay, he conceals his face with a mask, has a new costume and spelled blades, and he is a warrior who uses his body to fight and he also learnt how to be swift and quiet when he moves. Like a ninja or a thief.

Something switches in Kell when he decides to become Kay. He finds hope and confidence in himself for the first time in years after his magic was broken. He understands that if he puts his mind to it and if he believes in himself, he can be anything he wants to be. We see that he still longs for his magic even as Kay, and how he wavers because he is a human being and therefore he's not perfect. Kay was a way to cope with loss and build strength, both physical and mental. Kay was the light at the end of the tunnel. After his magic is fixed, it feels like Kay has served his purpose because Kell the magician his whole again. But Kell decides to still "perform" Kay's identity when he's in private with Lila, because she loves this part of him as well. And Kay is part of Kell by now, another side of himself he didn't know before he got on Lila's ship. After all, the reason Kell took on the Kay identity on the ship was because and thanks to her. Lila couldn't watch him self-sabotage anymore, and she gave him a pep talk which can be summed up in: do you want to keep sinking or do you want to learn how to swim? She knew Kell could very well swim, if only he let someone help him see how there is still much to his life than his magic. His magic didn't define him. And he decided to trust Lila for once.

Kay first appears after a few years of trying to swim and try to keep himself afloat. Lila was the main prompter of Kell's journey to freedom, to Kay himself, so it was only right that he would first show Kay to her. She was his final boss.

Beating her at something she excelled at was a big confidence booster for him, but getting her seal of approval with his new disguise? Lila being proud of him for both? That didn't just boost his confidence, but also his ego, and made his heart lighter. This man is so head over heels for her and I can't imagine how he was excited like a little kid when she was so happy that he had decided to trust himself and his abilities and to envision a new path for himself amid his hopelessness.

Lila was so proud of Kell and also turned on by Kay, because it was the first time in years she had also seen that Kell was finally getting better compared to when they first started their journey together.

The circle opened when he shows Kay to her for the first time and closes after his magic his fixed, after Kay has served his purpose in the story. Both of these moments lead to an intimate situation where Lila wants to see what Kay can do. I think that the intimate response is her way to practically show Kell how much she loves and appreciates him and how happy she is for him. It's her way to say I love you, because she prefers to show rather than tell. We see how Kay also works like this, in fact he leads her to the bed, surprising her. So Kay is Kell's daring side.

The reason why Lila doesn't want to let go of Kay even after Kell is back is because Kay is another side to him. A side to him he only shows privately to her, and that she knows deeply because it's a mix of his hopes and fears as well as his courage to dare and risk. He doesn't need to let Kay go. Kay is a side of him and she loves all the parts of him.

[gay-ghostwriter]

happy birthday!!! please feel free to share OC facts as desired now and always :3

Thank you!

I'm gonna use this as an excuse to ramble on about Caraway, the D&D character I'm currently playing

The big thing about Caraway is that he hates himself. This bad boy can fit so much self loathing.

He has "species dysphoria", which is a term I'm going to say that I invented, but I probably didn't. He things changelings are ugly and gross and that no one could ever love one.

Caraway prefers hiding behind the persona of Renard, the gentleman thief, and I kept the fact that he's a changeling a secret from the other players to make the reveal more shocking

As for his other two personas:

Marian Drew is a half elf woman who I created to be the most generic looking person ever. Caraway uses her when he wants to avoid attracting attention. Her name is a reference to "Merry Andrew", an old timey name for a clown, because my name is Andrew and I thought it was funny

Prince Lagrys isn't a persona that Caraway made up, he was a real person. While on an adventure in the Feywild, Caraway bought a mask that resembled the prince's face, and when he wears it he can take on the prince's appearance.

Caraway is obsessed with the mask/Lagrys, because it gives him access to Lagrys' memories, specifically of being loved and adored by everyone. (I also have to make a saving throw whenever I put on the mask, no idea what happens if I fail)

He had a crush on my boyfriend's D&D character, Drazna, but that was entirely one sided and he got rejected pretty quickly. Caraway has bad luck with romance, it'd take too long to mention all the NPCs I've had him flirt with.

He's also trying really hard to live up to his father's legacy, and that's an entirely different kind of trauma. Imposter syndrome!

Basically Caraway doesn't think he's good enough at anything, and isn't happy unless he's pretending to be someone other than himself