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toovaeloe · 4 months ago

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bus stop 𝝑𝝔 “If I was your boyfriend, you sure as hell wouldn’t be waiting at a bus stop.”

suguru geto x genderneutral reader

no curse au

You’ve used the “I have a boyfriend” excuse and you may have just manifested one. Or a gorgeous man, at the very least

☁️🚏☁️

This was the worst, you think. Had to be punishment for something you did in a past life.

For starters, you were late for work. Was it your fault for staying up so late, giggling and doom-scrolling through mounds of mind numbing media? Yeah, maybe…

Let’s blame it on the weather. Your alarm didn’t wake you up after you silenced it. The neighbor’s dog wouldn’t stop barking through the night. But it’s not like you could tell your boss any off that.

So that’s why you raced out the door, haphazardly juggling your belongings in your arms. Wallet. Keys. Phone. Something else you couldn’t quite remember at the moment. Did you have everything? Probably; no time to check now. Only to find when you stomped on the brake and turned the key in the ignition…your car wouldn’t start.

Sputter…sputter…and then nothing.

Great.

There’s your late-to-work-excuse.

Maybe you shouldn’t have ignored the “maintenance needed” symbols that have been lighting up your dash like they want their own holiday. To be fair, time and money just weren’t things that came in abundance.

In any case, as you were sitting in that local garage enduring the mechanic babbling on about vehicle expertise junk you just couldn’t begin to understand, zoning out and nodding every few minutes with a halfhearted “hmm,” so it at least looked like you were absorbing information…you made note to at least revisit the idea of changing your smoke alarm’s batteries before it decided to turn on you, too.

But that was last week.

7-9 business days.

That’s how long until your car would be up and running again. Apparently, according to the mechanic, you were lucky it was even that. Apparently. Which meant you needed some other means of transportation to and from work and such.

Lucky you had the local bus service, right?

WRONG.

They were always late, but you still felt the need to get to the stops on time, lest you have a repeat of 5 days ago. (You showed up only 2 minutes late and were left behind at the store. Had to wait for an hour for your friend to get off her shift and come pick you up.) You highly doubted it, but what with the way the world was shitting on you right now, it wasn’t out of the question. And the city’s money obviously wasn’t going towards public transportation— they could qualify as garbage trucks if they really needed them with how trashed they were. Mystery sticky patches on the seat, gum underneath. The inconsolable children whining their heads off. That was kind of cute at first, but now it made you want to throw yourself out the window. The whole thing was just the experience that you could expect from a free public transportation system.

And why was it so rainy this month??? Ugh.

But what could you do but make do with what you had? Complaining definitely wasn’t making your shoes any less waterlogged. Be grateful, or some shit like that.

That evening, however, as you were waiting twenty minutes past the time the bus was supposed to arrive at the stop after an exhausting work day…you were just so fed up with everything. With the puddle water soaking through your shoes, with the way you had to stand because the benches were damp…with this rando-guy who had walked up next to you that you were half sure kept looking at you. To say the least, it only served to annoy you in your already sour mood.

You were willing to just ignore it. Until he stepped closer.

“Hey I’m uh…I’m pretty sure I’ve seen you around.”

Oooohh boy.

“Yeah, yeah, it is you. I’ been taking the bus sometimes. Usually I’m riding my motorcycle but uh, not today.”

Did you ask?

“Thought I’d drop by.”

The public bus stop. (???)

“What’s yer name, toots?”

Yeah no. Go back to the 1950’s and maybe that’d work there. You’d rather lick the mystery sticky shit off the bus seat. You could pick up a date 10x better without opposable thumbs.

All of the above is what you would’ve liked to say. Alas, you were tired. You didn’t want trouble that would take more energy than it was worth. So before he could go any further, you just coined the foolproof line.

“I have a boyfriend.”

Lie. You didn’t, but it was the first thing that came to mind. And if that didn’t make him lose interest, then he must really be a pathetic asswipe.

Sadly, he was. In terms of getting the hint to shut up, the guy looked barely deterred; offended even, as he prattled on.

“Well why were you acting so into me then, huh?” You definitely didn’t. You don’t even know this dude.

“I wasn’t even going for you.” He definitely was.

“You’re—“ X, Y, and Z. Just because his game is trifling?? You felt a headache coming on. And maybe a bout of anxiety. People are crazy, and the last thing you wanted was for this needless situation to escalate into something dangerous.

The entire mess was occurring just as Suguru was making the commute to work on the same street. But he found himself slowing nearly to a stop when he caught sight of you.

How could a person look so exhausted; hair extra frizzy, floccose from the humid rain, clothes soaked, droplets of the downpour dribbling onto your cheeks and blinked away from your lashes…and still so breathtaking? Or perhaps that was part of your beauty in this moment. You looked every bit done with the day, but who knew when- if— he’d ever see you again? He’d be stupid, a fool to not at least try to strike up a conversation with you. He’d be…

…Probably like that idiot.

A sulky moue twisted at his expression as he witnessed the disgraceful way this loser was fumbling. Oh dear. His approach lacked so much grace, so much respect…it was really just distasteful. You didn’t deserve that. And frankly, he didn’t think he deserved to watch you be treated like that when he knew he could do so much better.

“Sorry to keep you waiting!”

A merry sounding tone directed your way had your head sharply whipping to the source. A tall dark haired man you’ve never seen before; layered in a gray colored quarter zip and dark slacks, you think. His approach was casual and relaxed, a subtly jovial yet inherently guileful grin tugging at his lips. He even waved to you like an old friend. His entire facade was so convincing you considered for a moment if you had known him from somewhere and simply forgotten.

No, you really wouldn’t have forgotten a face like that. Eyes like those. A presence so contrasting of itself and yet so cohesive in its own way, if you had to try and describe it. Just a damn beautiful man. With eyebrows that were beginning to crease on his forehead.

Ooh, you were staring.

More than that, he was giving you a pointed look that you didn’t notice while drooling over the poor guy. Unfortunately for you, slo-mo’s only happened in movies, and in reality you just looked like an ogling dork. But you didn’t have time to dwell on your embarrassment when he was quite obviously urging you to play along with this illusion he was creating.

And so you did.

“Oh- hi! No worries,” You insisted in an awkward attempt to adapt to this new charade.

“‘Hasn’t been that long,” though your reaction to his presence wasn’t as well-articulated, it was convincing enough.

The other dude looked to be at least somewhat suspicious, and might’ve spoken on it if wasn’t for Geto’s scrutinizing gaze and a simple raise of his brow.

“Can I help you?” And just for good measure, he’d wrap his arm around you, sliding his hand into your coat pocket as if he’s done it a million times before to pull you closer against him. Whatever glare this ravenette man was glowering down the length of his nose at this guy with must’ve been scarring, because he murmured some half-assed excuse before scampering away.

You idly wondered how’d he get wherever he was going without the bus.

Or maybe you’d have more time to think about it if your brain wasn’t short-circuiting, acutely aware of the unworldly attractive man’s hand resting just over your hip.

“Sorry,” Geto spoke after a few beats, languidly retracting his arm from your coat and back to his side. “You looked like you were about to burst a blood vessel entertaining him. I hope I didn’t overstep. Y’know, with your boyfriend and all.” He had to have overheard you earlier.

But the way he spoke made it sound as if he doubted that fact, glancing to either side of you as if to say That is nowhere in sight..? without being so overtly rude. Or maybe he just wasn’t all that apologetic.

“That-! Yeah,” You pepped with a nervous pitter of laughter, “yeah…it’s not a problem, thanks.”

Your hand gravitated to the zipper of your jacket, absentmindedly fiddling with it as you frantically thought up an at least half decent explanation. One that wouldn’t make you sound more clumsy than you already felt.

“He’s not real, so he won’t mind.”

Yeah, real smooth. What was that you said; about being able to pick up a date without opposable thumbs? You’d need at least ten pairs of hands.

But Suguru didn’t seem to mind. In fact, his grin widened into something toothy and almost boyish, his eyes crinkling at the corners in a way that added an innocent charm to his otherwise elegant features. He found it endearing.

“Perfect,” His response was coupled with a discreet chuckle.

“Don’t feel obligated,” He’d continue as he reached to the side of you. So close to brushing your shoulder, it made your breath hitch. Though truly he was reaching around you, sharply tearing a flier from the side of the bus stop and pulling a pen from one of his pockets. If you were paying more attention you’d have noticed the glint of impish amusement in his umber eyes that led one to believe that action was more deliberate than he let on.

Still, he’d make quick work of jotting down a phone number and the address of a nice restaurant he’s been meaning to try with Satoru— but plans change. “but I’d like to take you out. I was on my way over to ask you, anyhow.”

He offered the page to you; his handwriting as sumptuous and calligraphic as you would’ve expected his penmanship to be; in the margins of some tacky ad for a lawn mowing service. As you went to accept the paper, however, he rescinded it from reach. All whilst drawing closer so that his piercing dark amber eyes held your gaze with an unwavering intensity. The kind that made your stomach do flips and stole your breath away.

“And for the record,” He spoke quietly but poised; a conspiratorial whisper for only you, him, and the rain to witness. “if I was your boyfriend, you sure as hell wouldn’t be waiting at a bus stop.”

There wasn’t time to react; he was already slipping the page into your pocket, withdrawing to a comfortable proximity all the while waving you off and wishing you well with a kind smile, disappearing someplace else.

You didn’t even catch his name.

At least your bus was here.

a/n: I had something to say but I totally forgot 😭

OH but I did add an upcoming section to my masterlist so you can see my works in the works if you’d like! 🤍 always open to ideas too

Dear god I crave geto with that loose low bun that’s barely a bun kind of hairstyle. Ykwim???

ty for reading 🤍🤍🤍 love you have a lovely lovely day or night

edit: OMG THATS WHAT I WAS GONNA SAY. I kept accidentally writing bust stop instead of bus stop as I wrote this. So, sorry if you bust

☁️☁️☁️

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giggly-squiggily · 2 months ago

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Hide and Tickle (Bungo Stray Dogs)

*Flips hair, knocking over several things* Why hello there.

So! Y'all might remember this little dabble I wrote a while back; I said in the description that I wanted to make this a proper fic eventually.

And then 2022 and 2023 passed by like two ships into the night...

SO HERE WE ARE! :D I will admit- I was a bit lazy and put the sentence starter dabble as the opener- so this is more an extended version of that! I hope you like it! :3

This is also part 1 of a series I'm making! I have the perfect request to follow this one up, so stay tuned (hopefully this time I'll be before the end of the year lols)

Cloud 9 (Taglist Peeps):

@myreygn @thatbigbisexual29 @dirtpie39 @duckymcdoorknob @cupcake-spice13 @t-wordiiish @rachi-roo @mystwrites @chibisstuff @imjusthere07 @sevenincubistolemyheart

“I’m so boooooooooorrrreeeeed~” Dazai droned from his desk, eyes half-lidded with disinterest as he looked at the stack of paperwork before him. “Kuuuuni~ Aaaaatsushhhhhhi~ Entertain me!”

“Do your work. That should keep you entertained for a while.” Kunikida didn’t look up from his computer, unfazed by the brunette’s whining. “And sit up straight while you’re at it. You’re at work, not home.”

“But isn’t the armed detective agency our second home?” Dazai fluttered his eyelashes at them, pouting when neither paid him any mind. “I see how it is. I’m like the unwanted stray hoarded up in the family garage, living off scraps from the trash.”

“Did-did you just call yourself a raccoon?” Atsushi blinked, looking at Dazai. He fell right for his trap.

“Atsushi! You’ve noticed me!” Rolling over in his chair, he unceremoniously tossed his arms around the younger man, leaning on him with nearly all his weight. “Take me home and feed me delicious food!”

“I do have a spar futon…”

“Don’t entertain him!” Kunikida growled, giving up on his report as he slammed his laptop shut. “Fine, you want to play a game? Let’s play. You get ten seconds to hide.”

“Mr. Kunikida?” Atsushi blinked. Dazai seemed equally curious.

“What-”

“If we catch you,” Kunikida referred to himself and Atsushi, earning even more surprise from the weretiger. “You’re getting tickled. Is that clear?”

…Huh? No way Kunikida was suggesting that! Atsushi turned to Dazai, expecting some sort of coy reply or teasing remark.

Instead, he found nothing but air.

“Did he-” Atsushi blinked, watching as Kunikida took his seat once more, opening his laptop.

“That’ll keep him busy for a while. You’re relieved of your duties until my reports are finished.” The blonde jerked his chin to the office plant, Dazai’s foot sticking out comically. “See to it that idiot stays entertained.”

Atsushi looked between him and Dazai, the brunette subtly poking his face through the greenery to spy. Then he laughed, getting up with a nod.

“Be sure to type extra slow. Come here, Dazai!” Atsushi took off, charging the startled office plant full speed ahead. Dazai yelped as he dived, flying around the corner and sending the plant spinning. Atsushi’s quick reflexes saved them from the mess.

“Don’t make a mess!” Kunikida called after them, but his voice was muted at the noise. Dazai was sprinting between desks, putting as much distance as he could between him and Atsushi while giggling like a loon.

“Stahahay away! I’m nohohohoht reahahady!” Dazai wheezed, holding his hands up as he backed around Ranpo’s desk, the mentioned man eating snacks as he watched. “Ahahhahahtsushi!”

“Why so nervous? Running out of hiding spots?” The weretiger grinned, feigning left and right to throw off his boss. In the background, he could hear Naomi and Tanizaki giggling to themselves, amused.

“Quick, go left!” Naomi called out.

“No, right- go right!” Tanizaki added.

“Who are you two even talking to right now?” Dazai yelped, backing up towards the door as Atushi feigned a lunge forward. “Ahahahtsushi…”

“Coming around.” Yasano spoke from behind, her hands coming to his sides as she scooted. In that second, she pressed in sharply.

“EEHEE!” Dazai yelped, stumbling forward at the unexpected tickle. Right into Atsushi’s trap card.

“Thanks, Yasano!” The weretiger cheered as he quickly wrestled Dazai to the ground, quickly pinning his arms. “Mr. Kunikida-”

“On it.” The blonde was there in seconds, sitting on Dazai’s waist and rolling up his sleeves. “Not much luck hiding, was there?”

“Ahehehehehe, hehehehehahahha! Coohohme on- wahhahait! Thihihihs isn’t the mohohohost cohohoohmfortahhahable flohohoor!” Dazai giggled out his pleas, squirming some as he looked up with big eyes. “Spahahhare me?”

“Mr. Kunikida?” Atsushi asked, turning his attention to the other man.

“Hmm..” The blonde hummed, thinking. Dazai tried to smile.

“Get him.” He decided. Massive fail!

“Ehehehehhahahahaha! Whahahahit, wahhahahait pleahahhahahhahahse!” Dazai burst into giggles almost immediately, kicking his feet and laughing as Kunikida dug into his ribs. Above him, Atsushi grabbed both of his hands in one transformed paw; using his free one to slowly trace his tricep. “Aheahhhaha! Gheahahhaha! Nohohohoho! Nohohoho doohohn’t do thahahahhat!”

“Oo, he’s ticklish there?” Ranpo asked, now sitting on his desk. “I thought only Kenji was.”

“It’s not that rare of a spot. Tanizaki’s the same as well.” Yasano pointed out, earning a squeaky “Hey!” from the redhead. “Try his biceps too- he hates it when I examine them.”

“Yahahhasunohohoho don’t thehehell them thahahhhahahat!” Dazai’s complaints were quickly swept clean as Atsushi did just that- finding an even better reaction. “Aheahhahahaha!”

“So sensitive. It’s a wonder why you’d even try tickling others if this is your reaction.” Kunikida tsked gently as he moved up to his highest rib, prodding rapidly into the spot and making the other howl with mirth. “Atsushi- hold him tight.”

“What-Oh!” The weretiger yelped and scrambled his grip when Dazai suddenly shot his arms down, cheeks pink and head thrown back into Atsushi’s lap as the poet dug into his armpits. “Watch your head there, Dazai. You almost took out mine.”

“GEHAHAHAHAHHA! KUHUHUUHUNI PLEHAHAHAHHASE!” Dazai squealed, twisting and turning in their grip as his second worst spot was attacked. “IHIHIHIT TIHIHIHICKLES!”

“You don’t say?” The blonde growled, grinning at the squeaky wheeze the brunette let out. Having some mercy, he moved back to Dazai’s waist- a spot that wasn’t all that ticklish. “Are you not entertained?”

“Ehehe- aheahhahahhahaha! I meahahhan I ahahahm a lihihihiihittle!”

“He’s not fighting back, Mr. Kunikida.” Atsushi pointed out. Why he did so, he didn’t know. It was just odd how little Dazai was tugging at his wrists. “Maybe he’s getting tired?”

“No, he’s just enjoying himself.” Kunikida remarked. Such a simple comment, but it did wonders in flustering the man below them. Dazai let out a giggly whine and pressed his face into his arm, cheeks on fire and smile big.

Ah. Atsushi understood now. The running, the giggle fits, the lack of resistance.

This was Dazai’s plan all along.

In that case…

“Aww, is that right? Is it true you’re enjoying this, Dazai?” Atsushi cooed at him all sweetly, readjusting his grip once more so he could scribble against the back of Dazai’s ears- making him shrink up with a near silent laugh. “Is it true that you’re loving up tickling you? Huh? Huh?”

“Wow, he’s good at that.” Naomi mused from the background, Tanizaki and Yasano making noises of agreement. Kunikida even looked impressed.

“Are you gonna get back to work?” He asked. Dazai couldn’t speak, nodding rapidly.

“Should we let him go, sir?” Atsushi asked. The blonde thought about it some more.

“Yeah. Give him air. He might be a moron with a death wish, but he’s our moron with a death wish.” The tickles finally came to an end, leaving Dazai gasping for air and giggling softly. With no one holding him down, he was able to curl up, head against the cool leg of Ranpo’s desk. “Ehehehehe..ehhehehehehee…thahaht was fuhuhuhn..hehe..”

“Tch. Why did I know you’d say that?” Kunikida rolled his eyes without malice, heading back to his desk. “Get back to your desk once you’ve recovered. You still have paperwork to do-”

There was a flash. Dazai ran at him full speed; recovering rather quickly. Seconds later- Kunikida was face down on the ground, the brunette sitting on his hips. “Dazai! You son of a-”

“Atsushi.” That tone. Threatening and playful. The weretiger shivered all over. “I have all intended purposes of getting revenge for what you did to me. But I’m gonna make you a deal.”

Dazai turned to look back, brown eyes dark and dangerous and oh so daring. “Help me tickle Kuni, will you?”

Thanks for reading!

#BSD #dazai osamu #atsushi nakajima #kunikida doppo #tickle #tickle fic #fluff #part 1 of two :3 #tickles for Dazai hehehehe

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gemini-sensei · 1 year ago

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Back on my angst bs

Imagine if Reader was dating Hawk when he was still in Cobra Kai. It was great at first and he always treated her right, but as he became more violent in the dojo, it started to scare her. They argued about it a bit before she finally broke up with him, struggling with his attitude and how it progressed.

She does everything to move on and get over him, but it gets hard after a few weeks when she finds out she's pregnant.

It's hard, but her friends rally around to give her support. They help her through the tough emotions and the early stages of pregnancy. She gets through it.

At school she hides any changes to her body with giant hoodies and sweatshirts. It isn't obvious at first, but as time goes on, her pudgy belly rounds out and she wants to hide it. She doesn't want Hawk or the Cobras to see. She doesn't want anyone but her close friends to know. It's hard enough as is.

But then she's struggling to get something in her locker and everything just falls to the floor. It's frustrating and it upsets her, which quickly turns into her crying over it, thanks to her hormones, as she's trying to pick everything up. She's on her hands and knees just doing her best when Kyler and a few Cobras come around and see her tears.

They start laughing and jeering at her, pointing at her and calling her pathetic. It only makes her cry harder. She's struggling and instead of helping, they're laughing. Not that they or anyone else around knows she's pregnant, as she's done literally everything to hide it.

However, next thing anyone knows, Kyler is getting slammed into a wall of lockers and Hawk is breathing in his face.

"What's so funny, dumbass? Forgot how to spell your own name again?" He throws him down and kicks him in the side, again and again, until he stops trying to get up. "Oh man, look at you on the floor. If only someone would help! You! Up!"

Each word in punctuated by another kick. Then Hawk spits on him and grabs him by the shirt, picking in up off the ground like a piece of trash. He throws him at his friends.

"Get him outta my face!" He grunts. "Fuck off!"

Everyone nearby takes the warning. Everyone but Reader, who is a little stuck.

She's sitting on the floor, unable to lift herself from the floor, never mind everything she dropped. She can only watch, tearstained cheeks hot to the touch.

Hawk turns to her and his whole face softens. "Did they hurt you?"

She shakes her head, a little embarrassed. "I can't get up."

He offers his hand and she puts both of hers out. He grabs them and pulls her up, but she loses her balance and stumbles. He catches her and she falls into him, her belly pressed up against his stomach. She looks away from him as she gets on her feet properly, but all he can do is stare.

"Reader..."

She doesn't say anything as he grabs the bottom of her hoodie. She doesn't try to stop him as he lifts it up and looks at her belly as it sits under a stretched out tee shirt. She closes her eyes as he puts his hands on her round midsection.

"Why didn't you tell me?" he whispers.

She starts crying again. "You beating the snot our of Kyler is a pretty good example as to why, for starters."

"He deserved it for treating you like that," he says defensively. He pulls her close and shushes her tears gently. Her cries echo down the empty hall anyway. "I'm sorry... I'm so sorry. If I had known-"

"I found out after we broke up," she chokes out. She hides her face in his hoodie, his familiar scent comforting. "I would have told you, but I didn't know how. Not with cobra kai still hanging around."

"I'll leave cobra kai. I swear."

"No, you won't. You love it."

"Not as much as I love you. Not as much as I miss you." He's ready to start crying as he holds her, just hoping she hears the sincerity in his voice. "You and this baby are more important to me than some dojo."

She's quiet for a moment, then looks up at him. "Babies."

"What?" he asks, dumbstruck.

"Babies," she repeats, then smiles through her tears. "It's twins."

He takes her face into his hands and looks her in the eyes. "I'm never going back to cobra kai, okay? Never. My place is right beside you, you and our babies."

She smiles and cries some more, but he wipes her tears away with his thumbs before kissing her. All this time he's wanted her back, wanted her by his side. He's missed her something terrible, but never knew what to do to win her back. But now that he has he back, he's not going to screw it up. He can't afford to.

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sgiandubh · 1 year ago

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Autopsy of a gay lie: the Wikipedia trail

“You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time, but you can not fool all of the people all of the time.”

― Abraham Lincoln

For starters, sorry for the length and numerous screencaps. It is an investigation, after all and these are sorely needed.

Never underestimate the conjugated power of Internet, a Sunday afternoon and the lightbulb moment that can happen while baking something, because you know, people have also to reward themselves at some point.

I might have fucked up my foolproof Lemon Squares recipe, but I regret nothing. It took me three hours I could have gratefully used to finish that spirits post, but this is too damn good not to share.

Remember Meow Kabob's cross my heart and hope to die pinky swear she found confirmation of Data Lounge's allegations on Wikipedia, out of all places? How she regularly unburies that infamous screenshot listing S under the Wiki "Gay Actors" category? How she told us, filthy and uneducated shipper mob, over and over again, that story about STARZ people scouring the Internet far and wide and scrubbing any gay reference related to S, as soon or shortly after he was cast as JAMMF?

I can confidently prove now Lincoln's perennial truths I quoted above apply to this situation.

I was just pouring my lemon juice, eggs, flour and sugar mix over the hot and nutty shortbread when I stopped in my tracks: 'wait a second, isn't Wikipedia an open source project? BUT OF COURSE IT IS, SILLY COW - yes, I very often talk to myself like that. RUN. NOW. I HAVE TO KNOW.'

Sure enough, like death and taxes, the full edit list of S's Wikipedia page was there for everyone to see:

Even better, since Internet is forever, we have full access to all these edits and can take screenshots.

This is how Sam's Wikipedia odissey started, on November 11th 2007, when he was the complete underdog:

A ' strapping lad with natural dark blonde hair and 6'2'' tall', ideal for the role of Alexander the Great - pious silence and RIP. I grinned, because it sounds well, naïve? It also sounds gay, perhaps? What else does it prove, other than the gay crowd has an acute interest for novelty and a wandering eye?

Nothing. Not even remotely related to S.

Also, note the two classification categories: British TV actor stubs/ British actor stubs. Mark them, they stayed still and alone for a looooong time.

Up until 2009, in fact, when the wikientry was no longer considered a stub and even got several category additions:

Then again, some movin' on up, on that semi-dormant page, in 2013. Totes normal:

By early 2014, even more interest in S commands an expanded webpage and a longer, more detailed, category listing:

Let's quickly peruse 2015...

2016...

The incorrect Irish descent category stayed there for about ten days, until removed by another user. This is how it is done and it is then added to the list:

2017, 2018, 2019, early 2020, no change in the categories, but all hell broke lose content-wise. From Cirdan, the 'estranged brother' acting in a very gay connotated theatre production I have never heard about, in London, September 2016...

...... to a woman named Tiffany Trach who used to dream the impossible dream, in October 2016 (and she was not the only one, far from it)...

...to some halfwit being rightfully slapped for adding brainless Flukenzie Floozy content in March 2017:

By that time, I was getting supremely bored clicking on links and wanted to pack the tent and throw my lemon squares in the trash bin. But, lo and behold, what do I see on January 26th 2020:

With the tag possible vandalism:

Whodunnit?

A very brave person, hiding under a string of random numbers...

... and one single contribution EVER to the Wikipedia juggernaut. This is what I would call a targeted attack:

It stayed like that, unmolested, for five days only, until the user Spiderpig662 decided enough is enough and did something about it...

....categories being then restored to the previous wording:

The last vicious gay reference on Wikipedia dates back to May 28th 2020 (Ha-wa-wee, anyone?), was labeled as 'hate speech' & promptly removed:

Where wuffter is, in British Cockney slang:

Same modus operandi, this time an IP address, pinging in (you simply can't make this shit up, can you?)...

County Durham, FYI.

I then asked myself when exactly did Meow Kabob appear on Tumblr?

Even more exactly, on...

That is, to say the least, a troubling coincidence.

I do not imply anything, I have no wish to attack anyone. All I am saying, is that particular argument, which this user is shouting anytime she is prompted to, had a very short online lifespan. How could an American woman, who appeared in this fandom shortly afterwards, have known about changes operated for five days only, by an unknown user, on the open source webpage of a B-listed British actor?

I have only one question, Your Honor:

WHY?

I rest my case.

[Edit]: To make it maybe more clear, I now know where the person adding that category lives, thanks to Wikipedia's own tracking system:

No surprises here:

Augusta. Georgia. USA.

Now, yes. Now I rest my case.

#fandom

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heartfeltcierra · 2 years ago

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Dude where's my submarine? Part 1 of Isekaied Law X Female Reader

AN- This will be a multiple part series. I should have the second part up by Sunday night. This was a change of pace from my normal writing so I hope you all enjoy :)

Masterlist

Part 2- Here

Part 3- Here

Word Count 4.8K, Lightly edited

Summary- A familiar man finds himself in your strange land, so what do you do? Give him unrestricted access to the internet, hope for the best and pray he doesn't see your AO3.

Warnings~ Mentions of being sick, Light cursing, Suggestive content, Angst, Fluff, Modern World AU, Y/N is a huge simp for Law and has a hard time hiding it

“I am so sick of being sick.” You groan out before blowing your nose into a tissue. “If this keeps up my nose is going to fall off.” You throw the used tissue into your bedside trash can that was home to a million more just like it.

You’ve been sick for the past week and no matter what medicine you’ve taken nothing is helping you get better. At this point you'd do just about anything to be able to breathe out of both nostrils again.

You look over at your alarm clock through your glassy eyes and see the glowing red numbers. Crap, it's already midnight?

The familiar sound of your text tone fills the silent room. Who's messaging me this late at night? After unlocking your phone you see a text from an unknown number saying. “What do you wish for?”

After looking at it for a few moments you chose to ignore it thinking It’s some type of scam. You lean over to plug your phone to its charger, causing the screen to light up. A smile forms on your lips seeing the familiar fictional man you simp for as your wallpaper, Trafalgar Law. A thought crosses your mind. If I could make a wish……

“I wish you were here Law, I bet you could help me get better in no time.” You laugh at yourself as soon as the words left your dry lips. “I sound crazy, but i guess It was worth a shot. I should probably go to a real life doctor tomorrow.” You turn onto your side and curl up next to a pillow before closing your eyes.

Thump

The unprompted noise causes your body to tense up. It almost sounded like someone or something fell. Slowly, you turn around on the bed and look into the pitch black area where the sound came from.

Thump

“What the….” Your racing heart stops in your chest hearing a man's voice followed by an irritated grunt.

“Who’s there?!” You grab your phone off the bedside table and turn the flashlight on while getting into a defensive position. “No way.” Your eyes nearly fall out of socket. In the middle of your room, clear as day, was a very realistic looking Law. I have to be hallucinating. You blink a few times, but he was still there, giving you a confused look. “LAW?!” Your legs give out thanks to the cocktail of shock and adrenaline , causing you to fall into the floor a few feet away from him.

“Where am I and who the hell are you?” He quickly stood up from the floor and held the handle of his sword like he was going to attack. “I’d answer quickly if I were you.” His golden eyes were sharp and serious.

“No need for that!” You stick your hands up showing you have no weapon. “Trust me when I say I’m not stupid enough to fight you. Nor would I anyways.” You can’t help but smile like an idiot, completely enthralled at the fact he was in your room. “You're like my favorite character Law!” You cringe at yourself the second the words left your mouth. Be cool Y/N, be cool.

“Favorite character?” He removes his hand from the sword and surveys the unfamiliar room. “Care to explain what is going on?” You stand up from the floor and turn the bedside lamp on.

“Well if I’m being honest, I’m not so sure myself.” With the room better illuminated, you get a good look at Law. He was wearing his signature post time skip hat, dotted jeans and a hoodie with his jolly Roger on it. I don’t think I’ve seen that one before. “For starters, you are currently in a different world.” You watch as Law’s brows furrow in confusion. “What I'm about to tell you may be alot to take in, so you may want to sit down.” You motion towards an empty spot on your bed. “My name is Y/N by the way, Y/N L/N.”

“I’d introduce myself, but it seems you already know me.” Law props his sword up against your bedpost before sitting down. “Go on.”

He follows along as you summarize your world to him and how you know who he is.

“So in your world I’m from a book series and tv show called ‘One piece’.” You nod your head. “ And in this world there is no ‘one piece’, devil fruit abilities, or pirates?”

“Well there are pirates, but they aren’t a big threat like they were in the 1700’s. That was this world's golden era of piracy. Right now the year here is 2023, so it was a long long time ago.”

“I see.” Law props his chin up on his hand. “So what did you mean when you said I was your favorite character?” You give him a nervous smile.

“Oh well you see. I just think you're really cool.” The complement causes a smirk to form on his lips. “Let me show you something.” You jump up from the bed and walk over to your closet. You dig around until you find what you were looking for. “Tadah.” You turn around to reveal the replica of Law's hat placed on your head “ROOM……..SHAMBLES “ You do the hand movements for his attacks. “Pretty impressive huh?” I look like a dork.

“Yeah, good job.” Law deadpans. “My turn.. ROOM.” The air in your room grows dense as the blue film spreads across your bedroom. “SHAMBLES.” You felt the hat on your head shift before it transferred into Law's hand, meaning the one you wore now was the real thing.

“Yours is a lot better quality than mine. But it’s the real thing so that makes sense.” You hold the hat and study its fine details. “And it’s a lot fluffier.”

“Oh yeah?” He took the lesser version of his hat off and spun it around in his hand. “Yeah this one is pretty crappy.” “SHAMBLES.” The knockoff hat was sadly transferred back into your hands. You place it back in your closet before sitting back down on the bed.

“I know you just met me and I’m sure you're overwhelmed right now, but can I ask a favor of you?” To your surprise Law nods his head. “I’ve been sick for the past week and I feel like crap. I’ve taken every medicine under the sun and I’m still not better. Do you think you can help?”

“I figured you were from the sound of your voice. I should be able to.” Law got off the bed and pulled his sword out. “Lay back.” If only that was in a different context. You lay down and watch as his sword waves over your body. “SCAN.”

“Did you see anything?” Law nods before putting his sword down.

“It’s right here.” Law places two fingers on a spot above your chest. The gesture causes your heart to flutter. “You have a virus of some kind. I’m not familiar with it, but I can take it out.” You feel blood rush towards your cheeks as his fingers brush against your skin. “Do you trust me Y/N?” He said my name!

“I do.” You nod confirming.

“Good. It may hurt for a moment. Just close your eyes, and it will be over before you know it.” Law's voice was smooth and calming. You slam your eyes shut and felt a sharp pain, but it was gone just as quick as it came. “Done. You will still have some drainage for a few days, but the virus itself is gone.” He places his sword back into its sheath and props it back up against your bedpost.

“Strangely enough I already feel a little better, thank you.” You weren't lying either. The heaviness in your chest was gone and the pressure behind your eyes was dwindling away. “So...” Law hums to let you know he was listening. “I’m not really sure how you got here, and I’m not really sure how to get you back if I’m being honest. I’m still having a hard time believing you're actually here.”

“Yeah. It’s pretty strange.” Law takes his hat off and leans back on the bed. “One minute I was walking around the submarine and the next minute I had some weird girl asking for favors and copying my moves.” You gasp at his audacity.

“Is that so? Well this ‘weird girl’, is the only person you have in this strange world you’ve found yourself in, so maybe you should be nicer.” You cross your arms over your chest defensively.

“You know I did just heal you.” He says in a matter of fact tone. “Was that not nice enough for you?”

“No, it was very nice. But…” You grab your nearest squishmallow and chuck into Law’s face. “What kind of doctor calls his patient a ‘weird girl’.”

“What kind of patient throws a..?” Law grabs the stuffed animal and examines it. You watch as a small grin forms on his lips after giving the plush a small squeeze.

“They are called squishmallows.” You point over to a shelf that’s filled with them. “I really like them as you can see.”

“I won't lie... It's kinda ugly."

“He is not ugly!” You grab the squish from his hands and hold it against you like a child. “Instead of putting my son on blast, how about we talk about the elephant in the room.”You take a deep breath and lean against the head of your bed. Having Law here was a dream come true, but at the same time you knew he needed to go back. “Tomorrow I’ll try to figure out a way to get you back to the one piece world. I’m sure Bepo and the rest of the crew miss you.” You stood up from the bed prompting Law to follow. “In the meantime, let me give you the grand tour of my place and I’ll show you where you can sleep.”

“Lead the way.”

~~~~

“So this is my kitchen.” You show him all of your snack cabinets. “I don’t have a whole lot right now, but I’ll go shopping in the morning.” You trail off as you rummage around cabinets. “I know you hate bread, but you like grilled fish and rice balls…”

“You even know that?” Law cocks his head to the side.

“Of course I do!” As much as you want to tell him everything you know about him, you also don’t want to overwhelm the poor guy with fun facts about himself.

“Well Y/N. What’s your favorite and least favorite food?” His question catches you off guard. He wants to know?

“My favorite food is (F/F), and my least favorite is (L/F).” You make a gag sound at the mention of your least favorite food. “It’s so gross.”

“Now we are even.” You blush seeing the small smirk on his handsome face.

“I guess so.” You smile nervously. “So anyways, on to the next room."

~~~~

“You can sleep in here. It's my spare bedroom/office area.” You open the door and flip the light on, revealing the bed, computer desk and two large bookshelves filled with anime figurines. “Oh and those are here too, haha.” Please don’t walk over there.

“Thank you.” Much to your horror the pirate waltz straight over to the shelves. He picks up the figure of his pre timeskip self. “How interesting. These are pretty accurate.” He places it back on the shelf before reaching for another. “I’ll be damned.” Oh no, it’s that one. “I really am your favorite character aren’t I?” His coy smirk never faltered as he held up the shirtless figure of himself.

You turn your head away, hiding the embarrassment written all over your face. “I think that’s enough boosting your ego for one night.” You look over at the wall clock in the room and see it’s almost 2AM. I need sleep. “There is a bathroom connected to the room over there and if you need anything let me know. Goodnight Law.” You ran out of the room and to the safety of your own. How am I going to survive this?

~~~~

The next morning you woke up feeling alot better. The soreness in your muscles went away and the fatigue you felt was replaced with energy all thanks to Law.

“Wait..Was that real or did I hallucinate?” You get out of bed and walk towards your spare room. The door was cracked open just enough for you to peak inside. Shockingly you see Law standing up in the room with a towel wrapped around his waist. So it wasn’t some fever dream, he really is here. You watch as droplets of water fall from his dark hair and down his tone, tattooed back. It was mesmerizing to say the least.

But what you couldn't figure out was what he was looking at. You adjust your angle and notice what he was holding. A pang of sadness jolts in your chest, he was holding your Corazon figure.

“Is spying on someone a custom here in your world Y/N?” You freeze up thanks to him calling you out. Law puts the figure back onto the shelf and walks over to the door that he surprisingly opens all the way.

“No it’s not like that. I was just getting ready to go out and wanted to see what all you need?” Your eyes give him one rundown before you close them and look away.

“Sure that's what it was.” The familiar smell of your strawberry shampoo invades your nostrils as he leans in closer. “So tell me Y/N?” His voice was right up against your ear. “Do you prefer the real thing or the figure?” Your brain hotwires at his words.

“Unless you want me to bring back nothing but bread, I’d suggest you stop teasing me.” You take a few steps back to create some distance. I’m so not enjoying this. “I’m going to go make some breakfast before I go. Come down when you're ready.” You walk away and turn back around to get one more glance, only for him to be staring right back at you. He gave you a small smirk before shutting the door.

~~~~

“Here you go.” You give the now fully clothed Law a pen and notepad. "If you don't mind, make me a list of things you need."

“Okay.” Law sat down at the kitchen table and started to jot stuff down. “I’m not sure how sizing in this world works, so I’m just going to put my measurements down.”

“That works for me.” You grab a spatula from a drawer and close it with your hip. “I may be out for a while at the store, but I want to show you something before I leave.” Carefully you use the spatula to transfer a fried egg to a plate and paired it with some fresh cut fruit. “Breakfast is served.”

~~~~

“This is what we call a laptop. It is a device we use for multiple things, but what I want to show you is a magical but equally horrifying thing called the internet.” You place the laptop on the kitchen table “The internet is a huge database filled with all the knowledge and information you can think of.” Law leans in closer to watch you navigate the strange device. “I’ll show you the basics. First let's start off with google. It is a search engine and you can ask just about anything. For example.” You type in 'Trafalgar Law One Piece' and it pulls up his character info page.

“So that’s how you know so much about me?” He reads over the screen with an interested look on his face. “Interesting.”

“Yeah. But there is a lot more to the internet.” You click away from the page and pull up youtube. “This is where you can watch different videos. Anything from music, tv show clips, documentaries and even surgeries. You can watch it all here!” You find one of the one piece openings and play it for him. “I don’t know if I told you this or not, but Luffy is the main character.”

“Straw-hat? That figures.” He rolls his eyes and judging by his tone…..

“Are you jealous that it’s not you?” After all the teasing he’s inflicted on you, it’s time the doctor tasted his own medicine.

“No!”

“Yes you are~”

“I am NOT.”

“Are too~”

“ROOM.” The blue film engulfs your kitchen. “So remind me who’s jealous?” The devilish smirk on Law's face sent a chill down your spine.

“Certainly not you.” You stand up from the chair and inch your way to the front door. I’d rather not die today. “I guess I’ll get going, try not to miss me too much emo boy.” You grab your keys and purse before you run out the door, leaving a very confused Law behind.

The first thing Law googled by himself was “What does it mean to be an emo boy?”

~~~~

As you shop around the store you look over the list of things Law wanted. He didn’t ask for much besides clothes and a few necessities. You go to the mens clothing section and pick out a few button ups, t-shirts and some jeans. The colors and style you pick seem to match his typical color pallet and aesthetic.

You wander down the book sections of the store and come across a book titled “How to shift into a different universe.” You glance through the pages without finding any clues or hints. How did he end up here? How was it even possible? How can I help him get back? Will he ever be able to go back? Your thoughts swirl around as you think of last night. What was I doing before he showed up?

“Wait.. the text message!” You blurt out in the middle of an aisle, earning a few awkward glances from fellow customers. You mouth a “Sorry” before scurrying away with the shopping cart. For now you decide to focus on the task at hand to avoid embarrassing yourself any further. You grab the rest of his requested items and a few extra things to keep him occupied until you figure something out.

~~~~

“Law I’m home!” You kick the door open and walk into the kitchen with the grocery bags. “Want to come see what I got you.” You yell out.

“No need to yell, I’m right here.” Law pokes your shoulder causing you to yelp out. When did he get in here?

“Are you trying to give me a heart attack??” An amused chuckle leaves his lips as you slam a hand over your racing heart. “Anyways, I got you a few extra things besides what was on the list...” You pull out a mens body wash and shampoo. “I doubt you're enjoying smelling like a field of strawberries.”

“I appreciate it..” Law grabs the bottle and smells it. “I like this, but.” He looks at the label on the bottle with confusion written on his face. “Why is it called bear fighting in a snowy tundra?”

“Your guess is as good as mine.” You shrug and Law does too. “Welcome to my universe, Law.”

~~~~

“So the internet…” The look on Law’s face can only be described with one word. Disturbed. Oh no. “I found some very interesting things. But what stood out the most was the things you’ve googled.” You clear your throat realizing you made a rookie mistake. I didn’t delete my history before I gave him the computer. You were sweating bullets at this point. “My favorite was “Law one piece smut”, that was quite interesting~”

“Not another word from you.” You turn away from him and grab your chest in relief. At Least it wasn’t worse like ‘Law rule 34’.

“I also saw you googled ‘things to do when you feel lonely.” The playful mood in the room dies and is replaced by an awkward silence.

“Way to kill the vibes Law.” You deadpan. “But yeah I did, what about it?”

“I’ve not seen any other people here besides us, so I take you live by yourself?” You nod. “Don’t you have any family or friends?” His question opens up an old wound that you never wanted to revisit.

“Well no, not really.” Saying that stung. At one point in your life you had both, but as you grew up people grew apart. “In this universe it's normal for family and friends to grow apart. But it’s okay.”

“I don��t mean to pry, but it clearly is not okay If you look something like that up.” You know he’s right, but there’s not much you can do about it. “Doesn't it make you sad?” You go silent, unsure how to answer. “You don’t have to answer that, I apologize for overstepping.”

“No, it’s fine. But to answer that, yeah, sometimes it does make me sad.” You smile thinking of what you do when you feel down. “This is going to sound strange but when I feel sad or lonely I like to watch one piece.”

“Does it comfort you somehow?”

“It does and I know how Silly it sounds.” You let out a nervous laugh. I need to change the subject. “Anyways, do you want to watch a few episodes with me? I’m sure you're curious.”

“Sure.” Law smiles

~~~

You flip on the T.V and pull up one piece. Scrolling through the hundreds of episodes you decided to watch the Sabaody archipelago arc considering it was when Law was first introduced.

“This is very strange.” Law watches the screen while scratching his goatee. “I remember that.” Law smirks, seeing himself cut up a group of marines.

“That is one of my favorite moments.” You couldn't help but laugh. “You were such a menace pre time skip.”

“You say that like I’m not currently a menace…. “ROOM.” The blue film fills the living room. “SHAMBLES” The fuzzy blanket you were curled up with is replaced with a piece of lint. You look over and see the blanket now covering Law. “I hope you don’t mind if I take this.”

“Give me that back!” You try to pull the blanket back over but Law overpowers you. “You're such a brat.”

"First I'm a emo boy, now I'm a brat!?” You smile triumphantly seeing how his face has offended written all over it. “That’s no way to talk to your favorite character Y/N.” Time to hit him where it hurts.

“I think I changed my mind. I think Kid may take your place.” You hear a quiet, but audible gasp come from Law.

“I’ll believe that when you show me a shirtless figure of him.” He recovers quickly with a wink before turning his attention back to the tv. I can't win with this guy.

You both watch the show in a comfortable silence. Every now and then Law would point something out or add in something about a scene. You smile watching as his tattoo hands move explaining something to you. Despite Law being a little despicable, you were enjoying the comfort that came with being around him.

After hours of watching your eyes became heavy. For a few minutes you fight it wanting to stay up with Law, but you lose the battle and succumb to a much need rest.

~~~~

Law found it hilarious watching you fight the urge to fall asleep. He was about to tease until he noticed you were lightly snoring. So she fell asleep? His brow raises seeing the uncomfortable position you were in. Your head was leaned on the back of the couch and it looked like your neck was going to snap in two. Your body must have realized this, because you shifted until your head fell against Law’s leg. He oddly enough, didn't mind. He threw the blanket he stole back on your body. You subconsciously nuzzle into his thigh causing the teeniest tiniest blush to form on his cheeks.

“Enjoy your nap, I’ll be here when you wake up.”

~~~~

A few hours later you wake up disoriented and in a strange position.

“Did you enjoy your nap?” Your head whips around to see Law above you reading one of the Modern Medicine books you got him.

“I’m sorry.” You lift up from his lap and scooch back over to your side of the couch. I was sleeping in his lap!

“You weren't bothering me.” He shuts the book and places it on the coffee table. “I’m sure you didn’t get the best sleep last night considering I showed up all of a sudden.” Wait, that’s right.

“That reminds me! I think I know why you got brought here.” You grab your phone and unlock it. “Right before you showed up I got a weird text on my phone.”

“Text?” Law raises his brow.

“So this is my cell phone.” You grab your phone and hold it up. “It is this world’s equivalent to a transponder snail. You can call, video, take pictures and receive/send written messages on it.”

“How convenient.” He grabs it and sees his picture as your background. “You really are something else.” You roll your eyes.

“Stop acting like you aren’t eating it up.” You grab your phone and pry it out of his hands. “So back to what I was saying. That night I received a message saying ‘What do you wish for?’ I didn’t really think much about it, but I did say I wished you were here because I was sick.” You pull up the message and show it to him.

“It has something else written underneath it.” You lean in with Law to see the text.

“Wish will expire one week from now at midnight.” Your heart drops. It’s nice knowing you have more time left with him but you know this whole ordeal has to be a big inconvenience for him.“ I can't help but feel guilty. I pulled you away from your crew for my own selfish wish. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, my crew can handle themselves for a few days.” Law props his feet up on the coffee table. “This is like a vacation for me, plus I find this universe interesting. The medical knowledge here is very advanced and I’m sure there’s a lot I can learn.”

“I’m glad you see it that way.” You stand up from the couch and head towards the kitchen. “I’ll make us some dinner.”

~~~~

After reading a recipe online you made tuna filled rice balls. They ended up looking good thanks to the mold you bought that shaped them like bears. You just pray they taste good. If anything he’ll at least find them cute.

“You're no Sanji, but I’m proud of you Y/N.” You pat yourself on the back and smile seeing how adorable they turned out. “They look like Bepo.”

“They do look like him.” Law yet again sneaks up behind you, causing you to jump out of your skin.

“I’m starting to think you enjoy freaking me out.” You gave him a playful smack on the back.

“It’s becoming my favorite activity~.” He grabs one of the rice balls and takes a big bite. The look on his face was hard to read. Did he like them? “Was this your first time making them?”

“Yeah why? Are they bad?” You're mentally preparing yourself for negative feedback.

“No, they're actually really good.” He shook his head and swallowed the last bite before grabbing another one. “The rice was cooked perfectly, and the filling.. Is it tuna?”

“It is! I figured that would be a safe bet. I made sure to stay away from the umeboshi recipes.” You grab one and take a bite. They are good.

“You're a very considerate person Y/N.” Law walks over to your fridge and pulls out two bottles of water. He hands you one before sitting on the countertop. “With that being said, it’s a little unfair how much you know about me versus how little I know about you. So tell me Y/N.” You turn your attention to Law. “What makes you, you?”

“What makes me, me.. Hmm.” You lean against the countertop beside him and ponder the thought. “I’m not really sure.” Your mind went completely blank being put on the spot.

“Is that so?” Law finishes off the last rice ball and takes a drink of water. “I guess that leaves me six days to figure you out.”

#law x reader #law one piece #trafalgar law #op law #one piece #one piece x reader #one piece x you #law x you #law x female reader #trafalgar d law x reader #trafalgar one piece #law x y/n

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mushroommanstan · 2 years ago

Note

university!au please!! infamous!shiggy with average s/o 🤼‍♀️ pls i

Oh anon, how did you know I’ve been wanting to write a college au Shig for a while? You must be psychic or something, very impressive!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Creepy Tenko Part One:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Anyways, I know you want the smut and shit but there’s a few things about Tenko that make him so infamous.

First off, his backstory. Basically, he was kidnapped by AFO as usual, but he was rescued by heroes this time a few months after. Unfortunately, a lot of damage had already been done.

The heroes were embarrassed as hell that they took so long to save him, and as a publicity act, paid to put him through elementary school, middle school, high school and hell even college. The big package.

Because of that, his entry was guaranteed since he was like 6. Obviously, this is gonna turn some heads.

Now this guy was infamous around campus for many reasons. For starters, growing up murdering his family and spending a summer with your local serial killer is gonna be the headline of his life. Everyone knows about that, and he doesn’t even deny it.

Also, because of that experience he has major ptsd and schizophrenia, causing a few tiny violent outbursts throughout his childhood. But it’s fine, he’s medicated now… most of the time.

He’s also very aloof, not talking to anyone if he can help it. He’s used to bullying, and at this point has pretty much given up making any friends. He’s so used to people being scared of him, just like his old master said, that he kind of embraces it, not even trying to hide when he stares at people for hours on end.

Oh yeah, and the stares. This guys got a dark ass aura. His blazing red eyes burn a hole in the back of the women he stares at. He’s a smart guy, he doesn’t need to pay attention to the whole lesson to get the gist. So lucky him, he can spend the rest of the class period staring at some chick while discreetly touching himself under the desk. Make eye contact with him if you dare.

The thing that completely tanked his reputation however, was when one guy got pissed at him for making goo-goo eyes at his girlfriend all day. He stopped him on his way to his dorm, punching him which made him stumble.

Something flew out of his hoodie pocket, and the man picked it up, students gathering around as he faced poor Tenko.

Tenko looked mortified, tears gathering in his eyes, but he wasn’t looking at his attacker. He was looking at his stolen object. The assailant hadn’t gotten a good look at what he was holding, and by the look on the freaks face it meant something to him.

The other students who gathered around screamed, some running to hurl in the nearby trash cans. When he finally looked at what he was holding it took him a good second to figure out what it was.

It was cold and grey. Fleshy with a golden back and… fingernails. Wait… was that… oh my god.

He yelled throwing the detached hand into the air, Tenko diving to catch it. He could feel himself losing control, his old senseis voice overtaking his brain and making his whole body shiver. He-he needed to calm down.

Tenko rose, pressing the cool hand into his face as he took deep breaths. He stopped trembling, and for a second, even with the screaming and yelling and trampling, everything was calm.

Obviously he got in trouble for having a murder scene victim’s body part in his possession, but Tenko knew from experience that no matter whatever bullshit they tried to scare him with, they couldn’t expel him.

He was like a mascot for the heroes’s new scholarship program. No way they would let him get expelled just because he kept a memento of his lost family. So, like always they payed them off. But the students remembered, and the guy who held the disembodied hand needed therapy.

So, not only was he a creep who got off to pictures of feet in the bathroom during homeroom, he also was a creep who kept a souvenir of his first murder victim with him at all times. Weird weird weird.

And then you came along.

He didn’t think much of you, that was, until you decided to sit down in one of multiple empty seats bordering his desk. No one ever sits this close.

Well… he had to admit… you were pretty. With your silky (h/c) hair, and your brilliant eyes, and your juicy, plump…. Eh-hum, personality.

He couldn’t stop himself from staring, not like he tried. You’ll learn soon enough that he’s a creep, and then he’ll be alone again. Yep. All on his own. Terrific.

His eyes bore into you, not just in one place but all over. Scanning over your body and memorizing every detail. From this close he could truly see how smooth and soft your skin was. And he could smell your perfume. What was that, lilac?

“Oh, do you like the perfume? I just got it! It’s lilac!”

Shit. You must have a mind reading quirk. He could feel his face growing bright red at the idea of you seeing the foul things he imagined in the last minute or so.

Truthfully you only knew because you could hear him sniffing the air like a puppy exploring a grassy field for the first time.

As the class went on you looked at him occasionally, not flinching whatsoever at the intense eye contact he returned. You had to admit… he was pretty cute. With eyes like those he should be the center of attention yet here he is sulking in the back of the class. Well, whatever, not your business.

The professor droned on about who knows what, making the both of you slump over your desks with boredom. You were praying for an oasis in the midst of this dry, dull desert of a classroom, when you heard a familiar sound.

Beep-boop, boop bleep!

You could recognize that sound anywhere! That was… that was…

You had to stop yourself from slamming your hands on the table in shock. The cute guy sitting next to you was playing the limited edition “Super Hero Adventure Deluxe” for the gameboy advance. (Not an actual game I think)

Aka, the only game in the Super Hero Adventure franchise you had yet to play. The one you had scoured EBay for forever. Holy shit, marry me!

You couldn’t help yourself, despite not knowing this guy in the slightest you pressed yourself into his shoulder, scaring the shit out of him and causing almost everyone to stop and look at you. You looked down at the pixelated screen, currently being death gripped by gloved hands as your cheek smushed against his fluffy black hair.

Tenko could feel his body shutting down from the inside. The sudden physical contact, the fact it was from a hot girl, and the realization she had an interest in his favorite game was all too much. Everyone watched as he pushed you away, screaming at you to stay away from him with some fairly colorful language.

Your expression darkened, and you grabbed him by the collar of his shirt. Having used to people tucking in their tail, he had to say he was not at all prepared for this. He didn’t actually want to fight you, he just wanted you to back off! … don’t make him fight you, you’re the first girl to touch him in years.

You both held intense eye contact for what felt like forever, but in reality was for only a second.

“You do not talk to me like that. Understand?”

Oh boy. Oh-ho-ho BOY you were awakening something in him he didn’t know he had. His face turned tomato red and his ire-filled glare turned into a soft gaze filled with child-like wonder. Not being able to speak he shakily nodded, hand raising up to feel along the one gripping his shirt. His fluffy hair bounced a little as he nodded.

You let go, returning to your seat with a huff and turned your head, and you were met with the utterly shocked faces of your classmates. They looked at you like you had just slain a dragon.

Meanwhile Tenko said nothing, face still completely red as his foggy mind spent the rest of class processing these new feelings that came up. The way you touched him, the way you scolded him! It was so… mean. So entitled. So dominant.

He wants more.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Believe me, I will be doing a part two! Thanks again for the ask, it finally gave me the kick in the pants I needed to write this!

#shigaraki tenko #my hero academia #shigaraki fanfiction #shigaraki x reader #shigaraki x y/n #my hero academia shigaraki #boku no hero academia tomura #shigaraki fluff #shigaraki smut #shigaraki tomura #college au shigaraki

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kidrauhlschik · 11 months ago

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4. Tangled Memories - Lee Know AU

Post Traumatic Amnesia (PTA) is a transient state of confusion, disorientation and memory loss that occurs immediately following a traumatic brain injury. PTA is sometimes also referred to as post traumatic confusional state and can occur from the moment of injury until the return of continuous memory.

The accident was a tragedy.

But it was the best tragedy to ever happen to you.

Final Part - See pt 1, 2, & 3 on the Masterlist linked above

Warnings: angst, f!reader, enemies to lovers, drunk driving, gaslighting, Fighting, yelling, cursing, angst, heartbreak, lies, angst, accidents, not proofread, minho is mean, lmk if I missed anything!!

Words: 2.2k

You find the note the next morning and immediately crumple it up and throw it in the trash. Since when has Minho been so sentimental and needy?

You can understand that he's over whatever rivalry he two of you used to have, but you're not. Up until the day before, you thought Minho was good, perfect even, but opening your eyes and remembering all of the awful things he's made you deal with made things so much different.

For starters, you can't believe that you trusted him. He's just as manipulative and sneaky as he's always been. He took advantage of your vulnerable state and made you depend on him. He would have been okay with you dying that day and all of the sudden he's not.

Yet, he also coaxed you down from your panic attacks, he made sure to always available for when you needed him, he stayed with you around the clock when you were injured. Thing is, you wouldn't have gotten injured if it wasn't for him.

The back and forth is overwhelming so instead of pondering on the fact you go to check your phone, which probably made things even worse.

Chris: He told me. Im so sorry. Its all my fault.

Innie: Wanna talk? I heard what happened.

Seungmin: I can't believe you didn't tell us you were remembering stuff.

Hyunjin: I'm sorry for keeping you in the dark. We need to talk.

Lix: Hey wanna come over? I can make us brownies and we can talk things out.

Changbin: Are you okay?

Jisung: Minho is really sorry. I am too. We all are. Can we talk it out?

Chris: Please?

Not wanting to deal with everything right now, you shut your phone off and begin your day. It's time to clean up and enroll in classes again. You should probably catch up with your other friends as well, you'd been very distant because you were always hanging out with Minho. It's best to keep busy and avoid thinking about that snake.

Tragically, as snakes would have it, Minho manages to slither his way inside your thoughts on a regular basis for the next month. As much as you hate it, you couldn't help seeing him in everything. He was in your sheets, in your kitchen, next to you on the couch, in the park, in the flowers, and in the sunset. Everything reminded you of him, every version of him, the bad and the good, and you're not sure which one you prefer.

Classes were to start in a week, through your circumstances, the school was able to let you enroll late to your classes, but you were now a year behind. There's so much to catch up on, yet your brain allows something to distract you from your studies, and that something is always Minho. He hasn't made an effort to make contact with you, which reassures you that whatever he had going on was all made up in his head. Maybe it was all a moment of hysteria.

The hysteria felt awfully real to you though. You can't help but doubt yourself and ask if the sleezy, ignorant, cold Lee Minho actually felt something for you, or if you felt something for him. That's why it's better to keep busy rather than to sit and ponder.

Chris: Wanna come over? It'll just be me and Jisung :)

You had forgiven the guys awfully quickly for your predicament. You could see why they'd put Minho in that situation in a moment of anger, they didn't even know that you were remembering your past, and although you wished they would have stepped up more to impede the shit show that happened with Minho, you can tell that they're sorry. They're your best friends after all, but you were still keeping them at an arms distance for the time being. Except for Hyunjin. He always encouraged you to chase after Minho and you couldn't help but too feel betrayed at that. No one else pushed you into his arms but Hyunjin did, and who knows? Maybe if he hadn't, you could've remained civil with Minho instead of playing house.

When you walk inside of Chan's dorm, the smell of warm pizza welcomes you like a warm hug.

"Hey! How are you?" Jisung asks from the couch beside Chan.

"I'm good, thank you." You offer a small smile in return as you take off your coat to lay it on the nearest clean, flat surface.

The place is a mess, there a cups everywhere, the trash is overflowing, and the entire floor had become a laundry basket. "I don't keep you guys in check for a year and all of the sudden your place becomes a pigs den?" You laugh while sprawling yourself on Chris' couch, throwing your legs over Jisung.

"Hey! It wasn't us, it was -" Jisung gets cut off by Chan discretely pinching his leg under the blanket. The younger winces but remains silent.

"Yeah, Jisung's been a mess lately." Chris smiles apologetically.

"Haha. Yeah, sorry." Jisung adds.

You couldn't help but feel as if they were hiding something, but before you could question them, the front door swings open.

"Jisung. What the hell do you want? I was in the middle of practice." The second Minho spots you, he freezes like he did before. Loss for words, he just stares at you as if he'd seen a ghost. He wants to walk out and get as far away from you as he can, but he also wants to run up to you and hold you in his arms. He wants to apologize over and over again, he wants to beg for your love, but he knows better than to think that you'd accept him.

You immediately hop off the couch, quickly on guard, wishing that he wasn't standing in front of you. Seeing him in your memories was very different than seeing him in real life. He looked thinner, tired, and restless. The Minho you had been seeing for the past year looked happy and healthy. Now he was drowning in his hoodie, his hair was messy, and his expression read exhaustion. You couldn't help the worry that seeped its way into your brain.

"What are you doing here?" You ask.

"I live here." Still staring at you in shock, unfortunately, it seemed that he'd gotten even better at hiding his emotions.

"What about your place?"

"I got kicked out for not maintaining the place while I lived with you."

Was he implying that this was your fault?

"You never had to live with me in the first place." An argument. Something you were both so used to, now caused an ache in both of your chests. Your words catch at the base of your throat, and Minho doesn't even have the energy to argue.

Minho finally takes his eyes off of you, scanning the area, looking at the mess he'd made at his friends dorm. The past month had been hell for him. He kept on beating himself up anytime he had a second alone with his thoughts. The only good thing he had done since he left your place was joining the school's dance team, hoping that doing something he enjoyed could take his mind off of you. He was wrong. Every time he showed up to practice, he remembered that you were the only reason he was doing this, not giving up on his dream. He was undereating and overworking himself to the bone, which was not the healthiest coping mechanism but the other option was to rot away in the couch.

He nods and makes a move to turn away, leaving the dorm again.

"Don't walk away Lee Minho!" He pauses his steps but doesn't turn around.

"You wanted me to leave."

"It's not that easy! I don't know what I want okay? I'm in shambles. I want you to leave, but I want you to come back right after. I want you to cry but it hurts to see you in pain. I trust you but I hate you. Worst of all I love you, but I don't even know what's real anymore." You throw your arms up in desperation, not even realizing that Jisung and Chris had left the area long ago. "I just want to know what's real."

Minho finally turns to look at you with an expression that can best be read as indignation. Or was it desperation?

"You want to know what's real? The real thing is that I want to know every part of you, every scar, every bruise, I want to trace the map of you! All of you and every thing about you. My fingers a compass, and your freckles the constellations that I will chart in my heart. That way, when I close my eyes I'll have you in my stars forever, because guess what? You're already in everything else! You're in the sun, in the air, and in my reflection. I'm drowning in the memory of you and the worst part is that I can't even see you!" Minho walks towards you but you stay frozen in place.

"It's never been the way you looked, it was always the way you were. You were like me, both broken and angry. It wasn't until I saw you behind the walls and I was able to see you bare. I would have fallen in love with you with my eyes closed, but I never could because we never allowed each other the chance. You told me that you didn't want to be the shell of who you are, so why can't you let yourself be happy?" He's face to face with you know, a mere couple of feet apart. He was no longer loud, but more so calm. His plea turning into a confession.

"From the moment I saw you making a fool of yourself in that park, I knew that you were worth the broken heart. Finish breaking my heart, and you'll find yourself inside. I'm sorry, but I'll never find the right words for you. You are my everything, always, and even that is not enough."

"Minho stop." Somewhere in the middle of his speech, your eyes decided to betray you and tears were now freely streaming down your face.

"I'm glad I found you, the real you, because before you, I never knew what to wish for. Want me to be honest?" He laughs and runs his fingers through his hair. "I'm terrified of letting you in. I'm scared to see myself more clearly through your eyes, wondering if I'm good enough. I already lost you, but the truth is that not having you scares me more than all the other truths of love. So please, look at me in the eyes and tell me that I'm not being real right now."

He's mere inches away from you, searching for an answer on your face.

So many thoughts but no clear answer runs through your mind, you're just overwhelmed by his confession, the situation, his mere presence, is not letting you think clearly whatsoever. So you break eye contact and make a bee line for the door. While holding the door knob, you stop and say your last words.

"Sorry Minnie."

Minnie.

The one term of endearment that Minho allows to give him hope.

Of course on the first day of class you'd be running late. You hated being late and the stress of studying is weighing heavy on your shoulders. How could the morning be any worse?

Luck is a funny thing though. Just when you think things couldn't get worse, they always do.

You bump into someone that simply continues walking, making you drop all of your notecards and papers on the floor. You immediately bend down to begin collecting everything, but there is so much going on around you. People playing around, others trying to find a seat, and more reuniting with their friends after the summer. So much people, so many noises, this is why you're never late to anything. The stress begins to build even more, to the point where your hands begin to shake, needing to move faster in order for you to find your own seat.

His hand comes out of nowhere. Body shoving away the people that were stepping on your stuff, rushing to pick everything up to help you. He hands everything he collected in a neat pile and you cautiously take it. He then turns to the nearest desk on his left, grabbing two coffees and handing you one.

"Hey, I'm Lee Minho. Looks like we're in the same class. Wanna sit together?"

Starting from where you left off was messy, but maybe starting from the beginning wouldn't be so bad. It will take time, but it might be worth it. If everything was real, it will definitely be worth it and more.

"I'm Y/N. I'm down, but I have to warn you, I can be a bit mean at times."

He laughs and hovers a hand on your lower back to guide you to the two empty seats next to each other.

"I wouldn't change that for the world." He gives you a small smile that could also be a smirk. He had the audacity to be cocky?

Despite that, you can't help the little ray of sunshine that warms you from the inside.

“I hope you mean that Lee Minho.”

“I always mean what I say.”

A/N: okay, i am not in love with the ending but honestly if it was up to me, i would've ended it on the last chapter. I'm trying something new w happy endings. Thank you so much for reading!!

TAGLIST: @stanstraykidsskz @weareapackofstrays @linos-kitten @cassidymb121

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angel-maybe-alive · 2 years ago

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I don't think that the hunger games is like above YA, it is YA and it was this brilliant moment on writing and publishing when for a small second, a small moment we could've had actually interesting and thought provoking books targeted to young adults that didn't treated this group as grown children

But capitalism kicked in and was like :not on my watch!

And anything that made hunger games brilliant was ignored, and all what the publishers saw was that if you give young, white, middle upper class, first world women some power fantasy about being a badass and having two pretty boys fighting for you( despite the fact that this wasn't even a big plot point of hunger games itself)and kill some people to make it look adult, they will throw their money at any mindless trash fantasy without a single thought because they read just for fun and it's not that deep

And because they have all the money and control most of the market, and are the trend starters being annoying booktokers and bookstagramers with shelves upon shelves of books they treat like decoration for their bookgirl-bohemian-darkacademia-manicpixiedreamgirl-core aesthetic, we now are lost in the forever hell of reading another book about Arsenic lavender avocado, the badass with the bow and arrow having to choose between boring tan Caucasian and boring pale Caucasian with some god awful faux conflict in the background just so she can be a badass and kill some people, don't mind that by the end she will become part of the oppressing class, don't mind that the conflict it's just about who has the god given right to rule over others.

DON'T YOU DARE THINK ABOUT THE BOOKS YOU READ

It's just entertainment, go buy another box of the next a noun of nouns and nouns, it will be the same safe and lovely power fantasy to make you forget for 300pages that in any scenario you with all privileges, and your first world problems, and your first world views are the capital

#hunger games #books #booktok #anti booktok #i will be a dick again #because why not #anti intellectualism #anti consumerism #anti capitalism

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justanotherrpmeme · 1 year ago

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Can't Take Criticism starters

"How dare you criticize my work! I put my heart and soul into it, and all you can do is nitpick?" "Why can't people just appreciate my efforts instead of always pointing out what I did wrong? It's so frustrating!" "Oh, great. Here comes the lecture from the expert on everything. I'm sure they never make a mistake in their perfect little world." "I can't believe you had the audacity to tell me I'm wrong. Do you even know who I am?" "Criticism is just a way for people to bring you down. I don't need that negativity in my life." "Constructive criticism? More like destructive criticism! You're just trying to ruin my day." "If you don't like what I'm doing, then why don't you try it yourself? Let's see if you can do any better." "I don't need your opinion on how I should handle things. I've been doing just fine without your so-called advice." "Not everyone is a perfect know-it-all. Some of us are still learning, and that's okay." "Why don't you focus on your own flaws instead of always pointing fingers at others? Nobody asked for your judgment."

[CRUMPLE] Crumpling up the paper with feedback and angrily throwing it into the trash. [STORM] Storming out of the room after a critique session, muttering about how everyone is against them. [DISMISS] Offering a suggestion for improvement and responding by rolling eyes and dismissing it without consideration. [OUTBURST] Overhearing people discussing the work and interrupting them with a defensive outburst at the first hint of criticism. [AGITATED] Becoming visibly agitated when ideas are questioned, insisting that they know what they're doing. [SCOFF] Responding to a genuinely helpful tip with a scoff and a declaration that they don't need the advice. [FIXATE] Fixating on the one negative comment and completely ignoring all the positive feedback. [DECLARE] Dramatically declaring they won't engage in a certain activity ever again after receiving feedback on it. [SHUT] Shutting down any suggestions that don't align with their ideas, refusing to consider alternative approaches.

#rp starter #rp ask #starter meme #roleplay meme #ask meme

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indomiinus · 8 months ago

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@fightful // planned starter

It had been several months, almost a year, since the Darkest Day and Eternatus's release and subsequent capture at the hands of the new Champion Gloria. It wasn't allowed to stay with her though, it had been swiftly quarantined because it was just reckless to leave something like that in the hands of a child, no matter how capable. It had also been months since Chairman Rose's arrest and Macro Cosmos was transferred to Leon.

It’d just been one thing after another, a nonstop roller coaster of emotions and Leon was tired. Maybe tired was an understatement.

"You don't need that pressure on top of everything else," Piers had told him while Leon sat drunk and miserable in Piers’s crappy flat in Spikemuth after a particularly rough meeting with the company board. "Let the other suits manage shit. This is just another way for Rose to screw you over; you think he gave it to you because he knew you could handle it? He gave it to you to crush you. Throw it in the bin."

And Leon thought about doing just that. He thought long and hard about what he wanted to do. It felt wasteful receiving Rose's legacy only to throw it into the trash; despite it all, he still cared about Rose and valued him and his opinions. What would Rose think? Would he be angry at Leon for squandering this "last gift?" Though, was it really a gift considering the things he’d uncovered about Rose while he was trying to get up to speed on the company?

The shady dealings, the contacts whose numbers were locked behind passwords that he couldn’t crack… It made his skin crawl somehow.

So Leon had to make his first real choice by himself. He just wished it wasn’t so hard. So Leon had to make his first real choice. There were only a select few people he trusted Macro Cosmos and the League to, and that was the Gym Leaders.

It wasn't on paper yet, and some weren't fully on board yet, but things were progressing and the interested Gym Leaders were starting to lay out and write down their requirements and ideas for the future direction of Macro Cosmos. That was a start, and Leon just had to keep the company afloat until negotiations were complete.

He could surely do that much, right?

He was restless, lost, constantly looking to people who were just as lost as he was or just as uncertain. He did his best - but his best certainly wasn't good enough. Error after error came back, piling up on his desk and most nights Leon slept in the office that still smelled heavily of Rose's namesake even months later. It was nauseating being surrounded by nothing but reminders of complicated, sickening feelings of disgust and childish dependency and not having the time or space to sort the feelings out.

Even his own flat was decorated the way Rose had wanted it to be. He hadn't changed a thing about it. Hell, he'd barely been home to change anything.

That night though, Leon had forced himself to get out of the office and try to go home to his flat in Wyndon.

Leon groaned, rubbing his palm across his face and rubbing the exhaustion from his eyes as he dragged himself down the quiet Wyndon streets towards Champion Crossing Station with his Mr. Rime, Reginald, guiding him.

"I'm so tired..." He complained under his breath, pulling his Rotom phone out and unlocking it. He yawned, the Rotom automatically opening up a list of currently open restaurants so he could grab something. Even if it was small, it was better than nothing. He just couldn't go to bed on an empty stomach again or else he was going to be sick in the morning. “I wonder if anywhere is even open at this hour…” Leon squinted at the screen, trying to read the offered list, but his strained reading was interrupted by a missed call notification from his mom.

"How long ago was that call?" He asked.

The Rotom hummed. "An hour." It answered cheerily. "Call back?"

Leon rubbed a palm against the side of his neck, and let out a heavy sigh. "Yeah, call back. It's so late, what's she even doing awake?" It only rang once before she answered, and he was barely able to get out a, "Hi mum," before his mother was interrupting him.

"Have you seen Hop?"

"Hop? No, I haven't, not for a while." Leon answered, scratching his chin and looking up in thought. "Have you called Gloria or Marnie?"

"Mhmm... they said they haven't seen him for a few days. I was hoping that maybe he was with you..."

Leon's stomach sank, and any amount of exhaustion he felt melted away slowly, seeping from his body like sand in an hourglass. He pressed a palm to his mouth, trying to hide the way his jaw had grown tense and his mouth had formed a thin, anxious line. "What about with Bede?" He suggested, only to be met with another negative. He sucked down a breath through his teeth and he let his hand fall from his face. "How long has he been missing? Have you tried calling him?"

"He's been gone for three days, and he isn’t answering. His Rotom just goes straight to voicemail." His mom's voice wavered. “I… I’m sure he’s just off collecting Pokemon. Maybe he’s up north… cell service is a bit spotty up there…”

Leon nodded even though some part of him felt like the whole situation was off somehow. He’d been up there plenty of times, and he’d never had signal trouble before. But if it made his mother feel better, then he would let it slide. “Yeah, I’m sure he’s fine. But, I’ll come by, okay? I’ll take a few days off, and when Hop gets back, we’ll have a nice family reunion.” Leon really hoped it would be that easy. He didn’t want to think about the worst case scenario.

His words seemed to appease his mother at least, and that was all he could ask for.

After a quick goodbye, Leon put in his notice for time off and recalled Reginald into his ball. In the same motion, he summoned Jules. The massive Charizard, larger and sturdier than most in the region, shook his head and gave his trainer a rough nudge with his snout and rumbled low in his chest.

"We'll get to rest soon, buddy, I promise." Leon apologized, patting Jules's cheek. "We’re taking a little vacation back home and I’d like to get there quick as you can, alright?" Jules snorted, and that was all the confirmation Leon needed. Without a moment more of hesitation, he hopped onto his Charizard's back and Jules took off like a shot.

Still, that rock of fear sat heavy in his gut. Not even the cold wind rushing past him and whipping his hair about his face and back chased it away. It just felt like he was missing something. Or something was wrong.

I hope I’m just being paranoid. Maybe once I get some sleep, I’ll have a clearer head.

—

Two days passed in Postwick and still nothing from Hop.

Leon and Jules had gone out to search the area, and the police had even been called, but both avenues had turned up nothing. Well, Leon’s search hadn’t, and the police just didn’t seem that pressed about the issue. A missing kid wasn’t exactly a serious thing; sometimes kids just got the itch for adventure and ran off, and then came back months later, their wanderlust sated. But Leon and his mom knew better than that.

Hop wasn’t the type of teenager to get up and run off just because the feeling hit him. He especially wouldn’t ignore phone calls. But the police just brushed them both off, though they finally did promise to at least keep an eye out for him. Leon had never been the type to lash out physically before, but in that moment, he certainly felt like he wanted to. He’d never been dismissed so easily before, especially when it came to something like this.

His mother was inconsolable and Leon was a nervous wreck; he barely slept, spending every hour scouring the air and the countryside for Hop in hopes of spotting him or a camp of his, but there was nothing there. Leon had questioned everyone Hop knew, hoping that maybe someone had seen him, but no one had but he hadn’t pressed much harder than that before he was moving on to the next person and place. But still, Hop was missing.

He’d been missing for a week now.

It was as if Hop had simply… vanished.

Leon sat at his desk in his old childhood bedroom, Hop’s journals and maps spread out in front of him and fear and anxiety gripping his chest in a vice. He’d felt bad looking at his brother’s private thoughts and feelings, and some of them certainly hurt to read, but he wasn’t there to snoop. He was just looking for… something. Anything. Any kind of clue as to where he could have gone to.

But there was nothing. And that was terrifying. His mouth had felt dry all day, no matter how much water or tea he drank, and his mother hadn’t stopped pacing or staring out the window since the police dismissed them both. Something was drastically wrong, and there was nothing he could do about it.

Leon groaned, hanging his head.

“Where is he…” He muttered to the air. “He can’t really have run off, could he?”

His Rotom chirped, pushing its way forward so Leon would have to look at the screen when he lifted his head. He gave it a wary look, eyes scanning the words and images on the screen and he grimaced faintly. “A… PI? What good is that going to do? Won’t he just say the same thing the cops did?” Leon questioned.

The Rotom gave the impression of a shrug. “Can it hurt to try?” It asked.

Leon sat up straighter, taking the Rotom into his hands and studying the address and reviews. “I don’t know… I guess not… I just–” Leon rubbed a hand at the side of his neck, brow furrowed. He chewed on his lower lip and pushed himself to his feet. “Alright. Alright, it’s the last legal channel I have, and then after that I’ll just have to figure something out. Even if I have to go find him by myself. Where’s that guy located at? Motostoke?”

“Yessir! I’ll set the GPS for his office.” The Rotom replied.

“Thanks.”

He grabbed his jacket on the way out, yanking it on as he took the steps two at a time. He paused by the front door, looking over at his mother, his brow furrowed. She was sound asleep on the couch, which she’d turned to face the big garden window in the living room and he felt bad leaving her alone like this without telling her to her face. All he could do was leave a note, which he stuck to the front door with some poster putty from one of the kitchen junk drawers.

‘Be back soon. Going to Motostoke, I’ll be back tomorrow.’

And with that, he was out the door.

With Jules flying him there, it didn’t take long for them to reach Kabu’s city, the Rotom tucked into the front of Leon’s jacket and spitting out directions and distance to their destination. The second it exclaimed, “Our destination is under us!”, Jules dove down lazily to land in a small convenience store parking lot so he didn’t halt traffic or cause an accident.

Leon hopped off his Charizard’s back and recalled him immediately. The Rotom freed itself from his coat and, once it was sure Leon was following, led the way down the street. They’d landed a couple blocks away, and while Leon had hoped the walk would steady his nerves, it just made him feel even more antsy, and maybe just a bit silly somehow.

He’d never, in a million years, could have imagined he’d be hiring a private investigator. It was the kind of thing that happened in movies or books, not real life.

It felt surreal walking up to the red brick building, a cute three story building that must have been apartments at some point in time before they’d been converted into freelance offices of various sorts, and the age of the building clashed with the new-ish electric buzzer system by the door. Leon fidgeted a bit with the hem of his jacket, scanning the tags until he found what he was looking for.

OCTAVIUS GREAT, PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR

“Well…” He took a breath and let out a nervous, anxious little laugh. “Here goes…” He pressed the button and stepped back, waiting with butterflies in his stomach to get buzzed in. His Rotom stayed at his side, ready to lead him around since it was likely that Leon would end up lost just stepping into the building.

#✦ v. missing persons #fightful #wheezes #im never writing a five page google doc starter ever again #and if i ever do again kick my ass about it

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cross-my-heartt · 1 year ago

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Rewriting Rebels Thrawn (Part one?)

Hello everyone, I was planning to do some comparison posts for Rebels Thrawn and canon book Thrawn (because as it turns out they are very different) but then I got another idea:

What if I took scenes from Rebels and reimagined them to better fit Thrawn's portrayal in the canon trilogy and Ascendancy? This way we not only get to talk about CB Thrawn but also compare him to his Rebels counterpart.

So this is what we'll be doing here!

Also, I want to point out that this post isn't meant to dump on the Rebels version. Both are valid iterations and which one you prefer is up to you. This is merely a fun little exercise for myself and a post for those potentially curious to know more about CB Thrawn.

So without further ado, here's the scene we'll be looking at for this post (minor spoilers ahead):

There are three things here that will need addressing:

One, Thrawn's open display of anger. Two, his demonstration of physical violence. And finally, what motivated them in the first place (ie Slavin referring to the Klaikori as trash and suggesting they get rid of it).

In the show this scene suggests that Thrawn is the calm polite type whose composure is only a veneer. The kind of character who's unpredictable because they're cool and suave on the surface but show their true colors when provoked.

Canon book Thrawn, in contrast, demonstrates a composure that is very much real. He is so composed in fact that it often throws his opponents off balance, especially if they're purposefully trying to get a rise from him.

On the rare occasion he does display anger it's usually through a tensity or rigidness of sort (lips thinning, posture going stiff, his tone turning tense, etc.) and his overall manner becomes more cold and clipped as opposed to aggressive or passionate.

He is also a capable fighter but only resorts to physical violence if it serves a purpose. For instance, the first time he and Eli are in a fight, Eli doesn't even realize Thrawn can hold his own because he's holding back as part of a bigger plan.

In general CB Thrawn is more likely to intimidate opponents by revealing his ability to defeat them, making his weapon of choice verbal intimidation. Add to that a lack of sadistic inclinations and you get a character who's unlikely to resort to violence as long as there are other means of achieving his goals.

Can he be ruthless? Yes. But not in a situation that doesn't call for it. Which brings us to the thing that prompted his outburst:

Slavin's comment is something that's unlikely to elicit such a reaction in book canon Thrawn. Namely because he's more than used to people's attitude towards his art obsession. He's been ridiculed for it in both the Empire and in his home world and he never reacts to it aggressively (the few instances he's open about his feelings on it, he's more resigned than angry).

Thrawn faced similar alienation (pun intended) in the Empire for being an alien and even then Eli seemed to get more upset on his behalf than Thrawn did. Because again, he's used to it.

Now. With all of that said.

How would I rewrite this scene to fit book canon.

For starters, Thrawn keeps his composure, merely telling Slavin that his opinion is the reason why he's not calling the shots in this situation. When Slavin asks him what he means, Thrawn tells him that he's clearly not capable of appreciating the Kalikori's value, implying Slavin's incompetence.

Even better, Thrawn gets confused when his comment angers Slavin - in the books Thrawn is often incapable of distinguishing compliments and insults from factual statements - and he politely apologizes to Slavin, telling him that he didn't mean his words as an insult but was merely stating the facts.

Throughout the whole scene he's neither condescending nor annoyed or smug. He keeps a calm steady tone and leaves Slavin feeling wrong-footed and humiliated.

So the whole thing would look something like this:

"We should just destroy that piece of Twi'lek trash."

"And that is why, captain, you are not the one making the decisions here."

"What? What do you mean by that?"

"I am merely saying that you are unequipped to appreciate the value the Kalikori holds for us."

"Unequipped?" [Slavin sputters, indignant] "I would like to point out, sir, that I have been here on Ryloth far longer than you have."

[Thrawn stops and blinks at him]

"My apologies, captain, my comment seems to have offended you. I did not mean to cause any offense. I was merely stating the facts as they are."

[he turns and continues walking as if the topic is closed]

"Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm conducting an experiment that requires my attendance."

Alright, that concludes this scene! My subpar writing aside, I'm curious to hear what any book fans might think. I won't be going through each and every one of Thrawn's scenes but I hope to cover those that are the most obvious candidates for a rewrite (and oh boy, hopefully none of them will need as much revision as this one).

#thrawn #grand admiral thrawn #thrawn trilogy #thrawn trilogy spoilers #thrawn books #sw rebels #rebels thrawn

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duckduckluce · 2 months ago

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@mr-pulvis liked for a starter

Other-Lucifer hadn't extended any grand invite to visit his universe, and Luci hadn't exactly been pressed about that at the time. More concerned for his own territory, what the whole connection of universes meant for him and his hell.

That said, after another day surrounded by the rabble of his home, he could really use a vacation. The thought of knowing so much less than the other Lucifer was just a touch bruising of his pride as well.

And so, once he figured out this whole portal-app business Vox had put together, he decided it was time for a stroll. He'd ask Lucifer for a tour of his hell sometime, but for now he visited the other Earth instead.

He had a human disguise, of course. Human skin tone, grey eyes instead of yellow and red, and his fashion was still fashioning but toned wayyy down.

No need to draw lots of attention today, just a professional man out for a walk. Enjoying the NICE side of humanity! Look at this, no murders are happening in broad daylight! People are- mostly, picking up their trash!

He frowned as he speared a discarded plastic bottle on the ground with his walking cane (just a normal, black cane. Understated), grimaced at it, then swung his cane to yeet it at the nearest trashcan. Aim was a tad off without his magic though, and he watched it arc through the air and bean somebody right in the head. "OH, sorry! Sorry!"

Rushed over to pick the bottle back up between two gloved fingers and drop it SUCCESSFULLy in the trash now, before turning back to the victim of his trash throwing. "Sorry about that, new cane, still getting the hang of it! I didn't hit you too hard, did I?"

#my art #mr-pulvis #long post SORRY

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silvergolddraco28 · 7 months ago

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LMK x Hazbin Hotel- part 11- Settling and Planning

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“AND WE’RE-“ Lucifer paused glancing at the snoozing fawn toddler clearing his throat. “And~ we’re~ back~!” He grinned. ‘Wonderful save… not! I nearly woke the baby!’

Wukong blinked again from the bright light of the teleport. “Looks like we will have to adjust this place to be cub-proof,” Wukong mumbled mostly to himself.

"Oh for sure!" Lucifer muttered in agreement, staring intently at the eyesore of a bar already thinking of what dangers a young toddler would get into just looking at all the bottles and the uneven edges. "Now that has to go for starters." The demon king pointed, which earnt a far cry from a certain albino arachnoid.

"WHAT?! NO! NO! NO! WE NEED THE BAR! I NEED THE BAR! HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO COPE?!" Angel cried from the sofa, attention finally setting on the group.

"By reading a book or something?" Lucifer cringed. Clearly noting this sinner's methods of salvation did not align with the hotel's morals. There was still much work to be done.

"N-Now let's....calm down Angel okay?" Charlie attempted to soothe stepping in. "Nothing's been set in stone just yet but we have a situa-"

"IS THAT A FUCKING BABY?!" Angel screamed looking past Charlie towards the fawn in Wukongs arms.

“Any more shouting and I will cast a three-hour muting spell. Do not wake the baby.” Wukong calmly intoned. “Lucifer, may I have my staff back?” Wukong asked with a slight smirk on his lips.

"Who's fucking baby is that?!" Angel continued, though his tone had noticeably reduced.

"No swearing in front of the fucking kid!" Lucifer countered, earning a pointed look from the room.

"A baby? There's a baby?! Someone gave birth?" Nifty's chipper tone seemed to come from within the floorboards.

"Angel..." Charlie stressed before the spider in question groaned, rolling his eyes as he stood.

"This is way too fu-”

“You finished that word and I will personally put a bar of soap in your mouth!” Wukong interrupted with a small glare before he placed a pair of earmuffs over the fawn’s ears.

“-fudging much. I need a drink." He grumbled with a small shiver at the very parent-like threat Wukong had promised while making his way towards the bar only to be halted in his steps by an eerily enthusiastic Husk. "Don't even try it. I need this." Angel stressed.

The king's attention went back to Wukong with a growing grin at seeing the earmuffs knowing it was probably a good call for the rest of the night until it could properly be addressed with new ground rules tuning out the hushed whispers between Angel and Husk. "Sure! Check this little baby out!" Holding up the crafted duckling, with the staff, much more miniature around its neck. "I made it travel sized! Isn't it just precious~?!" He cooed before extracting the weapon with ease. A golden light dusted the staff as Charlie watched in awe as it grew to a comfortable size now in the dapper man's grasp. "Honestly I thought you were kidding earlier but holy moly! It's pretty light actually!" Lucifer noted spinning the staff much like his own cane in his fingers.

"That's… probably because you can wield it dad…" Charlie noted recalling Wukong’s predictions on who would be able to lift the weapon.

Wukong gave a nearly predatory grin. “Looks like i got someone to help whip to shape after all!” Wukong chirped. “That goes double both of you, Charlie and Husk.” Wukong stated taking the staff out of Lucifer’s hand, shrinking it down to slip it on his left ear like an earring with a slim golden chain of energy on the two ends holding it in place from behind.

"Sounds like a lotta of manual work..." Lucifer narrowed his eyes but he wouldn’t pass up the chance to connect with his little girl on something they could both do. "I love it! Just what this hotel needs! Hard working and trained staff! Except you sweetie, lettou old man take care of any trash that would dare harm you." The demon cooed towards his offspring. "Throw in these guys too. Hell they could surely use it! Practically skin and bone. No muscle. What good will that do against an attack?" Lucifer tutted towards the of the group. "After all… We have a wittle baby to defend.- And the hotel-...of course."

"Training...?" Charlie murmured before her eyes grew wide with sparkles. "You'd train me? Eeee!!! That sounds super incredible! Does that mean I'll be able to lift the staff too?!" She questioned the celestial with excitement.

With Husk distracted by Wukong's statement, Angel used the opportunity to slip free, making a beeline towards the bar. "Training? Is that really necessary? I ain't planning on jumping into any deals if that's your worry." The feline expressed

“You’ve regained strength you’ve been unable to tap into for some time. You can easily end up breaking glass just as easily as breaking bone. Are you willing to harm someone unintentionally to keep up your pride?” Wukong asked Husk while resting the sleeping fawn on his hip, looking more like a mother dressing down their eldest son while taking care of their youngest.

"Oooo~ he's got ya there Mr. Big Dick!~" Angel crassly called downing a drink from the bar.

Husk turned with a growl, wings outstretched with building rage but in an instant he retracted. Stumbling as he did so. The simple action felt different. He could feel the sheer difference in strength. Wukong's words were clear. "...No." He sighed, correcting himself. Even he had seen enough to know that was never the case. Nor would he argue with the six foot celestial who defeated Alastor either. "It ain't worth it." The feline admitted. "I'll do the training, I guess."

The princess watched with a growing smile. The celestial seemed so motherly and especially handling a baby Alastor of all things! He was a clear natural. The sentiment was clearly shared as she gazed towards her father who bore a similar smirk at the scene. She wondered if he had felt the same at some point during their once shared lives.

“Good.” Wukong nodded. “Now seeing as Lucifer and I will be staying, Charlie, are there any connected rooms near the top? Ones that share a slightly smaller room that can be changed into a nursery? Seeing as only two of us have any experience in raising cubs it would be ideal for something like that.” Wukong asked the young woman.

Charlie gleefully paused in thought. ‘Connecting rooms… Connecting rooms…’ The princess’ eyes widened. “Oh my gosh- We do! Yes! We do!” Charlie beamed. She had always dreamed for a family of sinners to feel welcomed and touched enough to move in. Though it had never happened until now she had still designed the hotel with space and possibility for it to occur. Sure Vaggie had been a little skeptical but it paid off! It was great to think ahead like that. "Right at the top with a perfect view! Ooh I can get it ready!" She bounced on her heels with excitement.

“That would be a good idea if the room needs cleaning and to be aired out.” Wukong agreed. “For now is there just a quiet room I can put him down for a nap in?” Wukong motioned to the toddler on his hip.

"Of course! Hey Nifty?" Charlie called to which the little cyclops eagerly showed on her face fully removing herself from the floorboards.

"There were bugs down there!" She answered before anyone had even asked. "I'm on it!" She saluted already knowing what Charlie would ask of her as she made her ways towards the upper floors. She would double check later however, just to be sure.

"Now right this way," She ushered Wukong gently to one of the free rooms on the lower ground. "Not as spacious but it'll do nicely in the meantime." She assured the golden monkey.

“Good. I have to speak King-to-King with your Father after I put this little one down with one of my clones to watch over him.” Wukong stated to Charlie.

"Of course." She nodded, still coming to terms with the fact her co-worker would now need his diapers changed. "-Wait you can make clones too?! Awesome...!" She squealed before continuing in a more hushed tone. Oh she couldn't wait to start with the training! "There's a balcony on the upper floors, knowing dad he's probably marking it as his." Sighing with a small smile. "It's… never really in use but perfect for privacy." She smiled. There was so much she wanted to ask but the celestial probably needed time to digest it all as of right now. "I won't keep you but! I'd love for you to feel at home." Charlie murmured

“Charlie, any bed is fine after being forced to camp for fourteen mortal years on the ground,” Wukong replied with a chuckle.

Charlie gawped, both appalled and fascinated at the notion. "But you're our guest! Not to mention you helped calm down Alastor! It's only right that you get a proper warm welcome..." And suddenly the princess' eyes widened with an idea. How could she have not jumped immediately onto the idea of a welcome party?! She needed to find Vaggie and stat! "Rest assured Mr. King that all changes from today!" Charlie decreed with a look of determination burning in her eyes.

Wukong simply gave her a slightly raised brow before thinking nothing of it as she rushed off leaving Wukong alone to tuck the fawn into the bed allowing his magic to seep into the large bed and change it into a toddler-sized bed with raised sides carved with monkeys and peaches within the wood. He plucked a hair from his tail giving it a blow before a clone popped into existence. “Watch over him.” Wukong stated to the clone that saluted and transformed into a golden tabby cat with teal, scarlet, and peach-colored ‘tiger’ stripes. ‘Time to tell my story.’ Wukong thought.

TBC…

Until next time!

Heart comment reblog!

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chishiyae · 1 year ago

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— OUT WITH A BANG ! [𝙛𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜] e42! miles morales, e1610!miles morales, spider noir, and hobie brown

𝙧𝙚𝙫𝙞𝙚𝙬 ┊ summer is coming to an end, which means carnivals are making their final rounds before closing for good. so, what better way to round off the summer than to take your lover to one?

a/n. — this is literally just me coping with the fact summer is ending (+ i ran out of motivation for hobie guys i’m so sorry)

E42!MILES, will never be that boyfriend who spends a lot of money (whether he has it or not) on carnival games. let alone spend an hour trying to win you a stuffed animal. if he doesn't win whatever you want in the first two tries, he'll just ask the stand worker if he can buy it from them. now, as ridiculous as it may sound, given the amount of money he offers on the spot, the workers sometimes just give in. rather having free money than a stuffed animal. you hate the fact that he bribes his way of getting it. you could’ve gone to build a bear if you wanted him to buy you a stuffed animal. but you didn't want that; you brought him to the carnival for a reason. for bonding time. and playing games together was apart of that. but did you intend to tell him? no. because it’d look like you’re forcing it, so you stated that bribery wouldn’t work (until it did). and if that were to happen, because miles can't let things go, a conversation can go something like this:

“told you i’d get it, princesa,” miles brags. he’s walking alongside you, a smirk on his face as he watches you holding your stuffed bear.

you just shake your head, choosing not to say anything to him. that way, you avoid giving him any form of satisfaction. the satisfaction of anything. even kissing if it came down to it.

he nudges your arm, and you just glare at him. he put up his hands in defense, saying, "my bad.”

you sigh, “c’mon, we need to go to the ticket booth.”

miles just snorts, resting a hand on your shoulder.

other than that, he really only comes for the food. he loves funnel cakes, and he'd carry your stuff while you went from ride to ride or game to game while he ate and watched.

not that he doesn't go on rides; it just depends on how he feels. he has unhealthy urges to feel the drop of his stomach on some days, but not on others. if you ask him enough times on a day when he doesn't want to go, he'll give in, but will give you the option of him going on that or the ferris wheel. he's not doing both.

E1610!MILES, spends half of his time at the carnival focused on the goldfish you won. making sure that it’s not knocked over or pushed around too much. it's better to go home at that point. because the longer you stay, he'll just rant about the fish needing a tank and wanting to get it out of the bag.

prior to the fish, he'd been really excited to go with you to the carnival. you two definitely planned this a week in advance so that he could make sure that his time was free, so he's been thinking about it nonstop for the past week.

after he waves goodbye to his parents, your hand is instantly grabbed and you two run to the rides together (him dragging you), and the rest is history.

i say that because the next hour ends in throw up. miles goes on every ride possible, so it's not just a small amount of vomit in his throat that he can swallow. it's a lot more than that. not exactly a pleasant memory, especially given the stares he received when he had his head hanging over a trash can. but it's all good, at least you two got to relax for a minute before getting up to play carnival games. a break is always helpful.

or maybe you should’ve stayed put and relaxed a little longer. maybe you wouldn't have ended up at the fish prize game that way. miles seemed to be more interested with the fish than with you…

SPIDERNOIR, is confused — but acts collected. the. entire. time. he might not show it, but he’s confused.

for starters, this would be the first time he'd ever been to a carnival that wasn't all live music and exotic animals; after all, it isn't the 1930s. he'd be sent to modern times (your dimension), where most games are rigged and rides need a little more attention and caution than is given.

he was wary of the rides once you explained how they operated. not only because of how they looked, but also because of a few incidences you told him about (you really should've left that part out). so he tried everything to keep you from getting on one. when you walked? he'd put his hand around your shoulder so that whenever he spotted a ride, he could walk the other way, dragging you along with him. he’s just trying to keep you safe. if you love carnival rides, you'd notice his actions and end up going on a ride against his will. after all, you didn't buy those tickets for nothing. he'd hold your stuff and wait for you just by the iron bars, eyes tracking your every move. when you get off, his hand is back over your shoulder, and he decides that under any circumstances, he isn't letting go.

instead, you'd spend the rest of your time at carnival games. somewhere that peter feels he can protect you. but you don't mind, not with him playing darts against you. he'd let you win only to watch you smile and brag about it, because if he didn't, he'd win, and that's not much of a prize, now is it?

gift giving is one of his love languages, and you can guarantee he’ll get you one here. he tries to win everything you want, and even after he's won you a couple of bears, he brings you flowers from the ground as something extra to give you. yeah. i’d call it a romantic act. it's like something out of a movie.

HOBIE, is in love with the rush of riding rollercoasters. that being said, he drags you on all the rides, and it's best not to ask questions because he'll just say, "the rides ain’t even scary, they ain’t got scary ones here." or “i’ll be righ’ by ya side, love.” when it comes down to it, if you really don't want to go on one, he won't make you. however, he will go on them by himself while you watch. then, when he gets off, he'll tell you all about his thoughts and feelings during the ride. you merely roll your eyes when he suggest you should've gone.

because it's packed, a hand is on your waist the entire time you two are walking, and he’s positioned behind you. if he thinks you're walking too fast, he'll pull your belt loops to get you closer. he's does it to keep you from being lost in the crowd, but he can't stop himself from lingering his fingers over the waistband of your jeans.

#「𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐘𝐀𝐄 𝐖𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐄𝐒」#so many writings to be posted .. to be written .. and so many ideas #definitely not proofread #earth 42 miles morales × reader #miles morales x reader #spider noir x reader #hobie brown x reader #astv x reader #miles morales x y/n #hobie brown x y/n #spider noir x y/n #earth 42 miles morales #astv x y/n #astv x you

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magixfairyix · 3 months ago

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Iarcy Incorrect Quotes

Cause if a ship between Darcy and my OC (Iorda) gives me serotonin then so be it, I love these two.

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Aisha: When I said you should try being friendlier this isn't what I meant.

Darcy, stirring a cup of tea aggressively: Oh, so now I'm TOO friendly? There's no pleasing you.

Iorda, who broke into their house an hour ago: Two sugars please.

Darcy: Coming right up.

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*Iorda teaching Stormy to drive and taking Darcy along for the ride*

Iorda: That's a pothole. To the left!

Stormy: Take it back now y'all *Drives into pothole*

Darcy, sticking their face into the front over the center console: Cha Cha real smooth.

Stormy: I don't think that's how the song goes.

Iorda, crying and gripping the handle: Please just take me home.

Stormy: Country Roads.

Darcy: To the place.

Stormy and Darcy in unison: I Belong!

Iorda, crying harder: What the fuck?

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Iorda: *Stands in the trash can.*

Darcy: Iorda, not again! You're not trash, you're at least recycling!

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Darcy, holding a kettle: Coffee or tea?

Iorda: Tea.

Darcy: Wrong. It's coffee.

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Iorda: There. How do I look?

Darcy: Like a cheap French harlot.

Iorda: French?!

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Iorda: Hey, random question, what are your favorite flowers?

Darcy: Peonies, why?

Iorda:

Darcy: Were you going to get me flowers?

Iorda:

Darcy:

Iorda: ᶦᵗ’ˢ ᵃ ᵖᵒˢˢᶦᵇᶦˡᶦᵗʸ

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Darcy: I love you.

Iorda, not paying attention: What was that?

Darcy: I said I’m selling you to the zOo-

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Darcy: What situation is not instantly improved by the addition of fishnets, I ask you.

Iorda: Being a fish.

Darcy: Well, shit.

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Darcy: I can’t do this, it’s against my moral compass.

Iorda: YOUR MORAL COMPASS IS A ROULETTE WHEEL!

Darcy: …Your point?

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Darcy: *is throwing stones at Iorda's window*

Iorda: You have a phone for a reason, Darcy!

*THUD*

Iorda: DID YOU JUST THROW YOUR PHONE AT MY WINDOW?!

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Darcy: I made tea.

Iorda: I don't want tea.

Darcy: I didn't make you tea. This is my tea.

Iorda: Then why did you tell me?

Darcy: It's a conversation starter.

Iorda: It's a horrible conversation starter.

Darcy: Oh, is it? We're conversing. Checkmate.

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Darcy: Hey I got you food, pick a number between 1 and 10.

Iorda: Uh 4?

Darcy: Wrong, no food for you.

Iorda: Wait what?! WHY?! DARCY PLEASE—!

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Iorda walking into the kitchen and seeing all their limes peeled: Darcy, I love you but, what the h-e-double FUCK.

Darcy, sipping coffee happily: I love you too :)

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Darcy: Goodnight to the love of my life, Iorda, and fuck the rest of y'all.

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Darcy: BE A BETTER PERSON! —

Iorda: WHY?!

Darcy: BECAUSE SOMEONE NEEDS TO HAVE MORALS IN THIS RELATIONSHIP, AND IT SURE AS FUCK AIN'T GONNA BE ME, SWEETHEART!

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Iorda: You know my motto: carpe diem, carpe noctem, carpe coles.

Darcy : Seize the day, seize the night, what’s the last one?

Iorda: Seize the dick-

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Iorda: *seductively takes off glasses*

Iorda: Wow...

Darcy : *blushes* Haha... what?

Iorda: You're really fucking blurry.

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Darcy : You are the love of my life and I would do anything within reason to make you happy.

Iorda: I would be happy if you ate, stayed hydrated and got a reasonable amount of sleep.

Darcy : I said within reason, Iorda. How about I murder that guy?

Iorda: So murder is in reason but proper self care isn't?

Darcy : Well, duh. What kind of question is that?

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Darcy: Are you trying to seduce me?

Iorda: Why, are you seducible?

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Darcy, talking about Iorda: WHAT THE FUCK I WAS ARGUING WITH THEM AND I SAID “OOH YOU WANNA KISS ME SO BAD” AND GUESS WHAT? THEY DID. THEY KISSED ME. WHAT THE FUCK WHAT DO I DO.

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*The struggles of some traditions not being the same on Earth and Zenothe*

Iorda: Okay, I’m going to get the wedding cake.

Darcy : Perfect, while you do that I’ll check on the ring bear.

Iorda: ...

Iorda: You mean ring bearER, right?

Darcy : ...

Iorda: Look me in the eyes and tell me you are not going to bring a dangerous wild animal to our wedding.

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°

Darcy : Do you want to explain the text you sent me last night?

Iorda: It was autocorrect.

Darcy : Autocorrect wrote "You're so hot. Please step on me."?

Iorda: Yes.

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Darcy : Smart is attractive. Educate me on something I don't know!

Iorda: The mouth of a jellyfish is also an anus.

Darcy : Stop.

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Darcy : I truly go into housewife mode when I'm someone's soulmate- like, I'll make you pancakes and bacon every morning.

Iorda: This is a lie.

Iorda: I'm literally dating them. This is a lie.

Iorda: THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO COOK A PANCAKE, WHAT IS THIS.

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They just fuck with each other on a regular basis and both of them are just varying levels on unhinged.

#winx club #trix winx #winx club incorrect quote #winx club funny

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