#[ this is why i said you were sending me to jail lmfao ]

[worthyheir]

Incorrect quotes: feat. @eledrar

[the-bjd-community-confess]

k I don’t really care MUCH about cvlur’s past actions in the hobby with her preorder & shit, cuz I wasn't directly affected. it was one of those things where everyone was talking bout it but i didn't order/want a doll so it wasn’t personal to me. It sucked/etc/hope the victims got compensated/etc. That's a disclaimer cuz I'm neither a cvlur fan or hater. This ain’t about her directly. It’s about her fans/haters who like to debate this constantly lately. Which I seem to fuckin be surrounded by. Also, my tone is kinda aggro to some people cuz I curse but i don’t actually lose sleep over this shit lmfao.

what DOES annoy me anytime someone brings this up like that last confession crying about how ppl are so mad she fucked up when she was “young” - girl is ALMOST 30 NOW if I understand correctly. If it happened 10 yrs ago she wouldnt have been in her early 20s, she’d been like 16-19 and THAT would be WAY more understandable to say “she was young and didn’t know any better.” this shit happened LESS than 10 yrs, she was like, college age, which for US is 18-22 TYPICALLY if you go to college fresh outta highschool for a 4 year degree. ppl in their early 20s, while yeah, in the grand scheme of LIFE are young, are still ADULTS, capable of running complex fuckin tasks from working at a company to managing money for a group order. ppl in their early 20s include 20-24. stop infantilizing people. People can make mistakes at ANY age and severely misjudge a situation (intentional or not what she did). cvlur and I are roughly the same iirc, at the time of sending this im 28, turning 29. If she’s younger than me, she was running an order as a highschooler, which she wasn’t.

There were SO fucking many ppl in college in their “early 20s” who, mature or not, worked with large sums of money, complex organizational structures, etc. some ppl are suited for that shit, some ain’t. You can straight up just say “she was under prepared for the situation” instead of “oh poor bby she was so young 🥺 she just didn’t know!!!” you sound like a fuckin moron, anon. Do you treat every 20yr old who makes a simple mistake at the grocery store like that too? You better tip ur waiters extra who are under 25 even if they spill your drink or make you wait bc they were just too young to know better, they can’t be blamed for that

and for the other person in the comments too, “adults obsessing over her” or whatever …… she’s an adult she’s an adult she’s an adult no wonder why she avoids talking to ppl both haters and fans alike take away her fucking agency SO much. OFF THE SUBJECT OF CVLUR but relating to scammers rn tho, the same can STILL be said about it. Their age doesn’t = not knowing enough about running a good thing. Look at ppl complaining abt dxg1rly, is she worse than everyone younger bc she’s said she’s almost 40, so she only went in with bad intents and not a mistake like cvlur? same with bvmf?

Not sayin dx or bvmf or anyone else who’s been late on shipping/etc etc is absolved of anything, or that they’ve done smth, and same with cvlur, cuz i’ve never ordered from any of these ppl. but don’t give ppl the weak ass get outta jail “oh i was 21 I was just too young to know!”to keep using esp if they really did do something bad. Also, anon, late shipping is absolutely scam territory, and if it happened to you I bet you'd cry scam too by year 2 or whatever lmfaooooo. Thanks for coming to my “I don’t like that the community infantilizes so much shit about this hobby for grown adults” ted talk, I’m off to go scam someone or smth cuz i’m in my 20s so I’m young and don’t know any better lmfao

~Anonymous

[xcjkt]

Little Trikey Drabble.

Characters; Michael Townley x Trevor Philips.

Timeline; Early 2000′s, North Yankton, pre Michael’s death.

Content Warnings; homophobic slurs, domestic violence, angst, mentions of suicide, swearing. (It’s GTA V i feel like that should just be a CW in general)

Summary; Michael makes homophobic statement and it sends trevor into a fit of rage. 

Author’s note; I wrote this a few months ago and only two people have ever read this and I feel like Tumblr is the place I can share this. I am a huge angst writer, especially for Trevor and Michael. I have about 200 pages of drabbles like this so if it works out I might post more LMFAO i am so self conscious about my writing.

Trevor hated being Canadian, it was what he was known for in the group. Everyone taunted him by making comments about his barely noticeable accent and how he said “eh” a lot at first. Michael started calling him Moose as a joke for a while before it became the only thing Michael called him for weeks. He hated it but he learned to love it more than his own name. 

The cold December night started small, just Michael and Trevor driving around, Michael was teaching Trevor how to drive so in case he ever had to play the role as getaway driver he was more experienced and could drive safely. Trevor was going 105 down the interstate weaving through traffic with a huge smile on his face, Michael laughing all the way down the road with him. They finally had to slow down due to the cars matching speeds and it being too tight of fit to safely squeeze through. Trevor burst out laughing, “You’re good at that!” Michael squealed with laughter. He placed his hand on the back of Trevor’s neck, “I might have you drive us to safety from now on” Trevor took everything Michael said as a compliment. Michael never had anything bad to say about Trevor. They pulled off the interstate and into a diner parking lot. “Thank you M, for everything,” 

Michael was the favorite part of Trevor’s life, when he was there to pick him up from jail the first time he went up until this moment. Trevor unbuckled himself and took a deep breath, Michael had gotten out to stretch his legs, “Wanna grab some milkshakes? My treat for being the bestest best friend anyone could ask for!” Michael called out curling his finger in trying to lure Trevor out. Trevor chuckled, getting out of the driver side seat, “fine, but! I get to drive home,” he said, running up to Michael and grabbing his arm, spinning the two of them around. They found a seat against a wall Trevor against the wall and Michael sitting next to him practically touching hips. There were a couple a couple booths away from them sharing a milkshake, just two boys holding hands not bothering anyone. 

“Look at those two fags over there” Michael scoffed, Trevor’s eyes went up immediately, “what did you say?” Trevor’s voice sounded cold, “those faggots, over there” Michael pointed to the couple oblivious to the hate they were getting, “what’s so wrong with that?” Trevor asked moving away from Michael “It’s disgusting and wrong” Michael laughed “Why are you a faggot too?” “…yeah” Trevor mumbled, his heart pounding out of his chest, Michael froze, “Trevor, I- Why didn’t you tell me?” 

Trevor practically pushed Michael out from the booth and walked out the door, Michael following trying to grab his arm, “T! Please, I’m sorry I didn’t mean it!” Michael yelled. Trevor turned around and shoved Michael to the ground, “four fucking months Townley! 4 fucking months I’ve been wanting to kiss you! Fuck you Townley! Fuck you!” Trevor screamed opening the car door handle, he slammed the door and turned on the ignition and sped out of the parking lot. 

His heart was racing, he felt betrayed and disgusted. He felt led on for months, felt like he was just being used to be bent to Michael’s will. He would’ve done anything for Michael. He stepped on the gas harder, “Fuck!” He screamed as he weaved through traffic, he didn't know where he was going, nor did he care. Just wanted to find somewhere to hide from everything. He kept hearing his phone make noises from the center console cup holders but he was going too fast to even care to see who was texting. He knew who was texting him, he knew Michael was spamming him with apologies.

He found a side road and took a sharp left to get on the road, it turned down a snowy dirt road and he slowed down, he was angry but not angry enough to kill himself. He pulled over and punched the steering wheel over and over until his knuckles were bloody, he screamed out before sobbing into the window. Everything was crashing down around him, the only person he ever saw staying in his life forever. The texts had stopped but they turned into spam phone calls, every time he saw “Mikey <3” on his phone screen he hit his leg shouting for him to leave him alone. 

Trevor didn't show back up to the group for a few weeks, everyone had thought Trevor had killed himself or ran away. Lester was the first one to see Trevor. He came over to the house late at night smelling like he had been running through the sewage systems, “Trevor, Oh my God,” Lester whispered, grabbing Trevor’s arm and pulling him in. He had a black eye and his arms were bruised or had cigarette burns on them. “Please don’t tell Michael I’m here. I’m quitting, I’m out, I just need to get my shit and take a shower and I’m out.” Trevor’s voice was raspy, he sounded like he had been talking for days straight without a pause for water. “Trevor, what the hell happened? Michael’s been bitchy with everyone or not speaking at all. Something happen?” Lester asked Trevor, taking him to the kitchen. “I don’t want to talk about it, I just want to take a shower and leave,” “T, I can’t let you do that, you’re our best gunman, your aim is spot on, please just sit down and talk to me.” Lester pleaded. He didn’t know where Trevor was the last few weeks, he was completely off the radar, which scared Lester, he was typically able to find anyone in Ludendorff, but Trevor… He goes completely radio silent. 

“No! I said let me shower and I’ll get my shit and go!” Trevor snapped, his voice louder than intended, “Trevor, Michael and Brad are upstairs, if you wake either of them you wont able to leave quietly” Lester snapped in a low voice, “Whatever, Michael can go fuck himself anyways” Trevor hissed heading up the stairs and straight to the room that held all of his clothes. Lester was the only one in the crew old enough to own a home so everyone stayed with him. 

Trevor grabbed his back pack from when he was in school and started to pile all of his clothes into the bag, shoving them down into the bag to fit more clothes. It was difficult to move around in the dark, even harder to make sure he was getting everything he needed. 

He couldn't get a drawer open so he kicked it hard. This causes the dresser to hit the wall with a loud thud. “Fuck” he mumbled under his breath. He quickly grabbed his bag and made a beeline to the bathroom, terrified to run into Michael. He didn't make it to the bathroom door in time before running straight into Michael who was blocking the door. Michael grabbed his shirt and dragged him into the bathroom kicking the door closed with his foot, Michael threw Trevor back, “Where the Hell have you been?” Michael hissed. “Wouldn't you like to know?” Trevor huffed readjusting his shirt, “I’m not fucking around Trevor” Michael snarled approaching Trevor pushing him against the wall, “Get the fuck away from me Townley,” Trevor spit in his face. Michael grabbed Trevor by the throat sliding him up the wall, “You need to listen to me!” He snarled, “Kill yourself” Trevor sputtered out, clutching Michael’s arms to try and lift himself up to get air into his lungs again. 

Michael let out a shout and threw Trevor to the ground stomping past him and leaving Trevor in a dry heaving mess on the ground. Trevor could hear Michael’s bed room door slam before a loud “FUCK” could be heard. Trevor sobbed out on the floor clutching his throat trying to breathe.

[highqueenofelfhame]

a promise (elorcan)

The puddles splashed up her rain boots as she stomped through the parking lot, the hood of her jacket popped up over her dark hair to shield her from the rain. To say that she was annoyed would be an understatement - Elide Lochan wasn’t exactly happy that she was arriving at the police station in the middle of the night, in the middle of a storm.

“I’m here for Lorcan Salvaterre,” she said flatly to the officer at the front desk, pushing her hood back from her face.

“Ah, so you’re Elide?” One of her brows arched and she ran her fingers through her damp hair. A few water droplets flicked onto the counter and she wiped at them with her sleeve.

“That’s me,” she confirmed with a nod, shoving her hands into her pockets. The man nodded and abandoned his station to slip through a door that only opened with a keycard. He was gone for a few minutes and Elide could hear conversation through the thick metal door. After awhile, she could swear that she heard Lorcan’s voice on the other end. Her eyes fluttered shut for a moment, praying that he wasn’t causing more problems, but when the door swung open he was laughing.

“You came.” When her eyes opened, she had to tilt her head back to look at him properly. He was standing so close that she could feel the warmth radiating from his body. Arching a brow, she reached up to tug her hood back on, letting the top flop down over her dark eyes to block out the view of her ex boyfriend.

“I said I would,” she sighed, rubbing the bridge of her nose. “Let's get you home.”

Lorcan stumbled the entire way to the car, forcing Elide to throw her arm around his waist just to keep him from falling into a puddle. Not that her small frame could do much to keep him from falling, but at least it kept him on the right path toward her car. The rain had let up thankfully, only coming down in a light drizzle that kissed her skin.

Getting him into the car proved to be a small challenge. He knocked his head on the doorframe twice, slumped into the seat with one long leg stretched out and making it impossible to close the door. When Elide reminded him to push the seat back for more leg room, his entire face had lit up like she was the most brilliant woman he’d ever met because she suggested something so simple. So basic. Something he’d done a thousand times upon getting into her car.

The whole drive home he spent with his body turned toward her, fingers reaching out to toy with her long, damp, and inky hair. The first two times she slapped his hands away, shoving them back into his lap only for him to reach back out a moment later to twirl another strand through his fingers all over again. Now, she was just letting it happen, letting him send goosebumps all over her skin when his hand brushed her neck or her shoulder. At this point, her knuckles were white where she gripped the steering wheel.

“You look cold. Are you cold?” When she glanced over at him, he was frowning and reaching for the knobs to turn up the heat, to blast more air throughout the car.

“I��m fine, Lorcan. Leave it alone.” Again, she shoved his hands back into his lap only for him to catch her fingers and lace them with his own. She hated the flush she felt when he brushed his lips against the back of her hand before bringing them to rest on the console between them.

When she turned into the parking spot at their apartment, she pulled her hand from his and got out of the car, not bothering to help him into the house the way she’d helped him to the car. Instead, she aggressively unlocked the front door and left it open for him to trip through while she tugged her boots off and tossed them into the closet by the door. Lorcan shut the front door carefully, so carefully it almost annoyed her. She then went to the kitchen and started making tea and rummaging through the fridge for a snack.

“Ellie.” His voice was a low rumble against her back, vibrating her bones down to the marrow and his strong arms slipped around her waist. Elide closed her eyes and tried to twirl out of his arms, but he didn’t let her. “Ellie, I’m sorry.”

“Well it’s not okay. Can you please let go of me.” It wasn’t a question so much as a command, and he removed his arms and she instantly turned the stove off. Suddenly, she didn’t care about tea. She didn’t care about the slight grumble in her stomach. She just wanted to go to bed and forget that today ever happened.

Elide took her time getting ready for bed, combing her hair for ages until she slipped from the bathroom into the bedroom in hopes that Lorcan would be asleep. She wore a pair of yoga pants and a tank top - not one of his shirts like she normally did. Part of her couldn’t stand to smell like him right now, though she knew once she was in bed the smell of whiskey and his cologne would consume her and she would want nothing more than to snuggle against him.

Lorcan wasn’t asleep like she hoped. Instead she found that he’d disposed of his shirt and pants. Lounging on top of the duvet in his briefs with his perfectly chiseled body was another thing that annoyed her. He was physically perfect, down to the messy bun that he had shoved his hair up into using one of her scrunchies. Most girls would consider themselves lucky to have this waiting in bed for them. On any other day, she had felt that way, until he’d made some jackass comment about how their relationship was doomed to end anyway in the middle of dinner after downing one too-many beers. Elide had told him to leave, and he had, only for him to call her a few hours later from jail because of a bar fight.

It was impossible to hide the sigh she let out Elide crawled into bed, slipped under the duvet and lay on her side with her back to Lorcan. This was weird, uncharted territory. While she and Lorcan’s friendship had started out rocky, once their romance bloomed it had become clear that he would do anything for her, and she for him. Until today. Until he implied that their relationship had an end date when Elide had been browsing engagement rings in her spare time. It was still mind boggling to her that they were on such different pages and she hadn’t ever realized it.

“Elide?” The bed shifted behind her, and she could tell he was beneath the blankets now, too. His warmth bloomed through her as he pressed against her, draping his arm over her side. “I’m sorry. Please talk to me. Just look at me.” At his request, she rolled over and faced him with tears burning her eyes. When he saw the look on her face, his own features crumpled and he pressed a kiss to her forehead. As badly as she wanted to melt into it she shoved him away.

“If we’re just doomed to end then why even entertain this relationship? Why move in with me?” She sat up and ran her fingers through her hair and felt his hand on her back. She tried to shrug away from him but he sat up and wrapped his arm around her. “Can you stop? Do you realize how much worse you’re making it?”

“Elide -”

“What was the point? What am I to you? What was I to you?” Lorcan was quiet then, his eyes not leaving her face for a single second. He lifted Elide and pulled her into his lap and she hated that she pressed her face into the curve of his neck. Angry she may be, but he was still here, wasn’t he? He’d come home. He had wanted to come home. Surely that said something, she thought to herself, her fist wiping at her eyes as his chin settled on the top of her head.

“You were like… like coming up for fresh air. It’s like I was drowning, and you saved me,” he said, lips brushing her hair. The words were slurred together, but clear enough to understand all the same. “Every day. You save me. I didn’t mean what I - Gods above, Elide. I want to marry you and it scares the shit out of me. I keep waiting for you to walk away, but even now you’re here. Even after earlier, you picked me up and brought me home -”

“Because you needed me,” she mumbled against his skin, letting out a heavy exhale.

“You pulled me out of the dark that I had been trapped in for years. You found me when no one else was looking.” His voice was low and raw, lips brushing against her ear as he moved to kiss her jaw. It took a moment, a long moment of his lips pressing soft kisses to her face before she turned in his lap and rested her hands on either side of his neck.

“I will always find you. But if you’re an asshole like that again, if you say something like that to me again, I don’t care how much I love you, I’ll -” He cut her off with a searing kiss, his hands tightening on her hips as he tugged her until her chest was flush against his. When he pulled back, he shook his head.

“It won’t happen again. I promise.” Another kiss. “I promise.”

@starseternalnighttriumphant @musicmaam @lorcansalvaterree @shyvioletcat @schmlip-scribble @ttakeitbacknoww @tonystarksbish @city-of-fae @hannreadsalot @myfeyrelady @kandasboi @empire-of-wildfire @stardustsroses @the-regal-warrior listen idk who I’m supposed to be tagging lmfao

[targaryenkaz]

i wanna be like grace kelly

one-shot to go with the moodboard i made yesterday! due to the lockdown & plans being cancelled, i spent my kind of a milestone birthday this year writing smut for the first time, so go easy on me lmfao

combo of the enemies-to-lovers & smut prompts

//

The sun blazed down on the marina, no cover in sight. Thank God she’d plied herself in sunscreen this morning.

 Monaco in May should be a delightful getaway from the stress of Caroline’s job. Being a spy for a private organisation hellbent on bringing down corrupt individuals was not an easy occupation. If anyone deserved a break from busting balls 24/7, it was Caroline and her colleagues. Alas, this was yet another mission.

 The Grand Prix would be taking place that weekend, meaning the tiny nation, that wasn’t even the size of an average city, was now even more crowded than usual. The whole place was filled to the brim with wealth and excess. It sickened her.

 She had some expensive tastes, sure. Clothes and shoes mainly. She prided herself on having a nice home to go back to, but she was still a small-town girl at heart and the avarice and overindulgence was too much for her to take at times. These people had more than they’d need in dozens of lifetimes. It was wasteful, and she was not wasteful. The fact a significant portion of the people currently residing on their $100,000 yachts had made their money through less than legal means was another sticking point.

 No, she didn’t understand why a tech giant needs to be worth sixteen billion dollars, but the guy was just a smart nerd with a trust fund who made an app at the time the market needed it. She had no issue with him or those of his like. It was the others she took umbrage with, who trafficked in weapons and people, and funnelled it all through their ‘legitimate’ business. For those types, she would stop at nothing to bring them down.

The target in her sightlines for this mission – one Mr. Lucien Castle – young, self-made, and corrupt to the bone despite what his charming demeanour may have you believe. Here in Monaco to deal with other rich assholes and sell weapons to people who will use them against people unable to defend themselves.

 All, unless she and Bonnie stop him. It’s one thing to sabotage a deal, they also need to know who the buyers are so they can send that information on to the authorities they can trust.

 Some of these men are rich enough to buy their way out of a deal but if there’s one man who doesn’t care about that it’s Marcel Gerard. He runs his own prison, not Gitmo style with torture, just a secretive jail that puts away the people too powerful to be held accountable by the legitimate authorities.

  The yacht party is as decadent and depraved in all its dripping wealth as she’d been expecting. What she hadn’t been expecting is Klaus or his younger brother Kol.

 Klaus Mikaelson, the terror of the espionage industry.

Mystic, her agency headed up by Katerina Petrova, wanted to make the world a better place. You would be forgiving for not thinking Katerina was a warrior for justice upon first meeting her, but she was the most determined people around and growing up in Eastern Europe during tumultuous times pushed her onto her current path. Decimating the world’s biggest bullies. The ones politicians would never take care of because often they were friends with said bullies.

 Hybrid, Klaus’ agency, headed up by his brother Elijah, had no such standards. They were a financial operation through and through. Stealing and selling information to whoever wants it as long as the price is high, not to mention their vicious reputations. They were despicable and she’d let him know it on multiple occasions.

 Plus, Hybrid was a dumb name.

 Not much worse than Mystic, a traitorous voice whispers in her head.

 Truth be told, she shouldn’t be surprised. Klaus had a habit of popping up where she was. Mystic was fairly new on the scene, only a few years old, but had made a grand reputation in a short time. After a year of establishing trust with their contacts, they finally started getting bigger missions. With bigger missions though, came bigger competition.

 She first met him in New Orleans, during Mardi Gras, busting a designer drug sale. The drug made users feel complete euphoria but had an abnormally high fatality rate of the people they tested it on. If their complete lack of empathy for who they intended to sell to wasn’t enough, they were also creepy human testers. Mystic wanted to remove all traces of the drug from the world, ensure its potent recipe never saw the light of day. Hybrid wanted to take the sellers out and get the recipe for themselves. She knows this because Klaus point blank told her so when he was attempting to woo her at a bar, thinking her a ditzy assistant to Enzo, who only came along as muscle.

 It was pretty satisfying to see the look on his face when he showed up to the burning compound, sellers in handcuffs, all traces wiped from existence.

 The competition was on from there. He’d underestimated her, and never would again. In Venice, he’d caught an infamous jewellery thief and kept the diamonds for himself. She had arrived just in time to see him speed away from her in the canals. In Melbourne she’d bested him, but he’d seemed more amused than upset. Condescending dick.

 In Taiwan, she’d fought several security guards, crawled through a laser security field in a designer dress and back again with the file she needed to put someone away for a very long time. Only for him to bump into her in the casino downstairs, take the file right out her hands and disappear into a crowd.

 That one had really pissed her off.

 There’d been dozens of these interactions, and she could really use a win.

 Her determination increases when she realises Klaus and Kol aren’t even using aliases. Lucien knows them.

 These spoiled rich boys are friends with an arm dealer. Now, it’s really on.

 “Always a pleasure to see you, Caroline, or should I say Arabella?” Klaus’ bemused voice washes over her, as he hands her a glass of champagne.

 Her and Bonnie, aka Arabella and Fleur, have been on-off undercover for months with these aliases. You just never know when a rich girl might come in handy. Their backgrounds were spotless, she wasn’t about to let Klaus ruin that.

 “Keep your voice down,” she hisses. “At least make this a fair fight. Unless you’re not playing? Just here to bro down with Lucien?”

 He chokes a little on his drink, smiling at her. “I’m not here to ‘bro down’ as you put it. I’m here for work, just like you. Does being so righteous and presumptive ever get tiring, love?

“Oh, screw you, Klaus. You’re not here for work, just like me. I actually have moral standards. I’m not friends with arm dealers when it suits me and use them for a payday when it doesn’t.”

 “You might be assuming a little much there. You and I, we’re not that different.”

 Ugh! That smug smirk. She wants to wipe it off his face at any cost.

 “I beg to differ. You probably have more in common with a girl like Arabella,” she lowers her voice, almost huskily, causing him to lean in. “Both unbelievably rich and thoughtless, with no care for others.”

 The smile on his face when she pulls back was not what she was expecting.

 “I’ll have to prove Arabella wrong then.” He gives her a long, appreciative look up and down. “Might I say she is delectable.”

 “She’s boiling.” Caroline briefly fans herself. Her hair is up in a fancy chignon and she’s wearing a black miniskirt with navy pumps and a navy light-knit sweater. She nearly threw it out when Kat put it in her suitcase.

 “I’ll die of heatstroke in that thing.”

 “Please don’t be so dramatic. Besides, haven’t you noticed how weather rules don’t apply to rich people when it comes to fashion? They’ll freeze at a gala in the Alps in a strapless dress with a perfect smile on their face.”

 “That’s just the Botox.”

 “Which they get in their underarms so they don’t sweat through their clothes and can wear chic Chanel jumpers,” she waves the offending piece in her face, “whenever the hell they want.”

 “I don’t have Botox in my underarms.”

 “I’m sure you’ll live.” And that was Kat’s last word on it.

 Back in the present, Klaus sidles closer to her, humour in his voice when he says, “Your sacrifice is very much appreciated.”

 She bites back a smile. Klaus is not charming or funny. He’s trying to knock her off her game. Before she can say something cutting and break the moment they’re in, Lucien interrupts.

 “Klaus! Arabella! I see you’re getting along.”

 Klaus turns, the arrogance returning in a heartbeat, and a possessive arm wandering about her waist. “Where have you been hiding this one from me, mate?”

 “Bella’s a new friend, of course,” Lucien says giving her a double cheek kiss. “I’ll be seeing you both at the party tonight, yes? Everyone will be there before the Prix kicks off. Luxure, the club in my hotel at 8 but I won’t mind if you’re a little late. For some of us it will be a very late night.” He winks at Caroline and kisses her again. Klaus’ hand tightens on her waist.

 “Will I be seeing you there?” Klaus asks after Lucien leaves to mingle.

 “Seriously? Of course, you will, I’m not an idiot. Don’t think you’re the only one hoping to scope out what kind of secrets he has lying around.”

 “And you’re…aware of what you’re walking into.”

 Any briefly warm feelings she was having freeze over.

 “I may not have your resources of experience, but I am good at my job. I know what I’m walking into.”

 She stalks away from him to find Bonnie. It was time to prepare.

A little before nine, she didn’t want to seem too eager, they’re putting finishing touches on their looks for the evening. Bonnie wears a one-shouldered, light blue gown with black detailing on the bodice that makes her look like a cross between a gladiator and a princess. Caroline wears a strapless red down, her fancy rich-lady lingerie pushing her boobs up to unimaginable heights, there’s gold detailing on the body and a very high slit on one side, the bottom of the dress if made of layered chiffon, giving a see-through but not quite look.

 Loosening off some curled strands of hair from her chignon, she and Bonnie high-five. Looking good isn’t their job, but if it was then they were killing it, if she does say so herself.

 “Plan, one last time,” Bonnie says.

 “We party, we mingle, act like normal people. When people get drunker, you find somewhere to set up shop,” shop meaning the tiny tech kit attached to Bonnie’s inner leg, that meant she could hack almost anything. “I play dumb drunk heiress and find out what Lucien keeps on the seventh floor.” It took Bonnie less than an hour to find the original blueprints of Lucien’s hotel. Nothing seemed too shady on the surface but with a little digging she found out that none of the original plans for the seventh floor went through.

 She had to hand it to Lucien though, it was less cliché than the basement or the top floor being his secret lair.

 “And finally, you keep an eye on Kol as I keep an eye on Klaus. We’re not losing out to them.” Bonnie and Kol’s rivalry was almost as bad as her and Klaus’. Those two were constantly trying to out-do one another with their computer witchery.

  A few hours into the party, Caroline finds herself dancing with Klaus. They’re the belles of the ball, all eyes on them. Caroline fights to keep the fake smile on her face as he twirls her around.

 “Impatient to get to the seventh floor, are you?” She works not to react, to give him any satisfaction. Clearly it doesn’t work as he chuckles. He’s always had the uncanny ability to read her.

 “So, what if I am? You wanna race?

 “I have a proposition for you,” he says as he drops her into a dip and runs a hand up the outside of her bare thigh. Caroline actually hears swooning from other party guests and rolls her eyes even as she shivers, her body naturally, and completely against her will, arching into him as he pulls her back up to his chest.

 “Not interested,” she responds breathily.

 “I think you might be. See, I want us to work together.”

 Now, that does shock her.

 “Why?”

 He holds her eyes, intensely, as he hasn’t before. “I have the feeling we’d make a good team. I’ve had it for a while, actually. We can share the credit and the spoils.” Leaning in to whisper in her ear as a lover might. “We’re the best in the business, you and I. Let’s put aside our differences and take him down together. If it’s an awful experience, we can go back to being adversaries. Take a chance, Caroline.”

 He’s goading her and she knows it. But taking down Lucien was more important than being petty and it would be easier if they weren’t getting in each other’s way.

 “Fine,” she sighs heavily, flirtatious smile still plastered on her face.

 Klaus smiles like the cat that caught the canary. “Wonderful,” he leans in and kisses her neck. She’s too stunned to do anything. “Now for our exit strategy before this place gets too wild.”

 She catches on when he grabs her hand and leads her off the dance floor in a light jog, much to the amusement of onlookers. “Sorry mate, can’t wait for later,” he tells Lucien with a smug smile as they pass him, heading for the exit. She forces a girlish giggle.

 In the lobby he pins her next to the elevator, in full view of the staff, pushing the button impatiently. She wraps a leg around his hip, and he stiffens slightly before relaxing into her. They pelvis to pelvis, chest to chest, mouth to mouth. They’re playing the parts of obnoxious, spoiled party guests but it does feel good, she hates to admit. And unless he has his gun in his front pocket, it feels pretty good to him too.

 “As lovely as this is Caroline, we do have a job to do,” he says with a deep swallow.

 “Just following your lead,” she smirks back.

 Klaus hits the elevator button impatiently before grabbing her hand and leading her to the required fire exit staircase in the corner.

 “Monsieur!” The receptionist calls out. “If you wait but a moment, you can take the elevator.”

 Purposefully stumbling a little to appear intoxicated he calls back, “Have you seen my date? I can’t wait even a moment longer.”

 “Won’t they be suspicious,” Caroline asks as they start to climb.

 “Likely a little, but I doubt they know their bosses hidden secrets. They’ll write us off as drunk and horny, and that’s only half true.”

 She snorts at that and Klaus turns to her, a delighted smile on his face she’s never seen before.

 No, that’s not true. She’s seen it several times, but never recognised it for what it was. He…enjoys her.

 His words from earlier reverberate around her head as they continue climbing. She always thought Klaus saw her as beneath him. That’s why she thought he was flirtatious with her when he was so vicious with everyone else. Because he didn’t respect her or see her as an equal. Maybe she’d judged too soon on that front. He was still cruel, obviously, and next to the people they take down, he and his family are the worst that capitalist society has to offer. She wasn’t going to ignore everything, just because he was making her laugh and she was attracted to him…and he smelled fantastic when they were pinned together-

 Snap out of it, Forbes. Focus on the job, she mentally chastises herself.

 Right. Work now. Panic over horny thoughts about Klaus later.

 When they reach the seventh floor, they don’t need to communicate out loud to understand that the door will be locked in some way. Klaus rears back as if to kick out when Caroline puts a hand on his arm to stop him. Reaching into her cleavage, she pulls out a tiny gun-like contraption, one of Bonnie’s designs, putting it up against the handle. “Be ready,” she mouths quietly at him.

 Klaus takes two syringes from inside his jacket, handing her one, and pulls out a long, serrated knife from his inner sleeve with his free hand. He nods at her. Ready.

 Pulling the trigger, the door handle quietly melts and sizzles off. Klaus bursts through the door, swinging at the first of the guards with the knife to take him off guard before he injects him in the neck with whatever sedative Kol cooked up. He’s done all this before Caroline even crosses the threshold. Watching him in action is…impressive.

 But she’s pretty impressive herself. She turns, ducks the punch the guard throws and knees him hard in the balls. Sucker punches him right in the mouth and injects him.

 Klaus smiles proudly at her, straightening his tie. “Shall we?”

 She flicks her hair out of her face and doesn’t fight her emotions for once, she smiles back. “We shall.”

 “By the way, how’d you know there’d only be two guards?” She asks curiously.

 “You’re not the only one who appreciates a well-thought-out plan, love.”

 “Hmm. Maybe we are a little similar.”

 After an hour of searching and bantering, (flirting if she’s being honest), they turn another corridor expecting it to be just like the others in Lucien’s maze, filled with doors with nothing useful behind them. That is not what they find.

 Great. Another laser field.

 She ties her dress in a knot to one side, takes off her heels and pushes them into Klaus’ chest. “Let me take care of this. Taiwan, remember?” She winks at him, too distracted by the job at hand to wonder at all these developments in their relationship.

It only takes her a few minutes before she reaches the other side, having contorted her body into all types of shapes. Opting not to turn the field off on the other side, it seems too obvious that someone might be alerted. She can hear Klaus grumbling at the other end, clearly coming to the same conclusion. There’s only one door down here and she steps inside.

 A gaudy, eye sore of an office. Must be Lucien’s. She digs the drive Bonnie gave her into the computer, letting her programming doing the hacking. Bonnie is no doubt somewhere, hacking into all the camera feeds to appear on a loop so no unusual movements pop up. It takes Caroline only a few minutes to find the file she’s looking for. A comprehensive list of buyers. She copies it onto the drive as well as all the other files she can see, never knowing what might come in handy, before making her way back through the lasers.

 Klaus looks astonished when she hands over the drive. “This is an act of trust, don’t screw me on this.”

 Nodding absently, as if it should be obvious, he waves his hand at the lasers, “How did you do…all that?”

 “I was a cheerleader,” she shrugs.

 They’re making they’re way through the lobby to the exit when Lucien appears, a girl on each arm. “My Bella! Klausy! The party’s just getting started, come join us.”

 “I think we’ve had enough for the night, mate, will probably just head out.”

 She keeps her eyes on Lucien, not wanting him to see her and Klaus’ form of eye-only conversation. What is he thinking? Does he want Lucien to be suspicious?

 “Oh, come on, love,” she says teasingly, leaning into his body like she’s still a little drunk. “Let’s stay a while longer.” Klaus’ whole face pales and he seems to be trying to subtly shake his head.

 Oh dear. She may have miscalculated. But it’s a nightclub, how bad can it be?

 “There’s the Bella I adore,” Lucien says shoving them towards the grand club entry doors.

 The doors open and Caroline has to fight not to stop dead and stare, walking further into the club like she’s not having a mini heart attack.

 There are people fucking everywhere.

 Gone is the bright chandelier lighting and crystal glasses. The whole place is encased in neon red and where the dancefloor once was, now there are velvet couches all over the place. People lying back or sitting up, bending someone over or kneeling in front of them participating or some just watching.

 Now it all makes sense.

 Lucien stalks off with his ladies to a corner, while Caroline grips Klaus’ arm and whispers, “What the fuck?”

 “I tried to warn you.”

 “What. The. Fuck.”

 “I thought you knew! Luxure. It literally means lust in French.”

 “I know what it means, I thought it was just a pretentious club name!” She whisper-shouts at him.

 She’s disgusted by the display, she is. There is nothing appealing about it, she thinks as her eyes wander.

 One man has his partner bent over a couch, thrusting into him from behind, face slack in passion. On said couch, a woman has a man on his knees before her while the man sitting behind her plays with her nipples. In a dark corner there looks to be a menage-a-huit going on.

 Turning to look at Klaus, she knows how aroused she must look and sees how dark his own eyes are. There are hundreds of beautiful, naked people around and his eyes are only focused on her.

 Fuck it. She grabs him by the back of the neck and kisses him, instantly licking into his mouth. After only a moment he pulls back to look in her eyes, their silent communication at work again.

 Yes, I’m okay with this, she’s saying. Yes, I want this. I want you.

 He must understand because he smiles and reaches for her again. The kiss is deeper this time, tongues tangling for dominance. They stumble over to a nearby couch, clearly disturbing someone by the scoffs they receive, but are too busy in each other to care.

 She straddles him, pushing her dress completely to the side so she can rub herself over him. Gently, he works with her, thrusting up as she goes down. Fuck, he feels so good. She moans as he hits her clit over her panties.

 He pushes them to the side, feeling how wet she is, before pushing two fingers into her and crooking them slightly, going straight to the spot inside her that makes her buckle.

 She thrusts with his fingers, completely boneless on top of him and she hasn’t even come yet.

 “Fuck you for being so good at this,” she says into his ear. He chuckles before speeding up, rubbing harder and harder, pressing his thumb down on her clit. He releases her and the waves roll over and through her, white light flashing behind her eyes. She’s moaning shamelessly but doesn’t care. She’s never been an exhibitionist, but then again, she’s never felt this good before.

 She opens her eyes and finds herself lying on her back, Klaus looking at her softly.

 “Hello, love,” he kisses her lips one by one. The look and the kiss so at odds with what they’re doing here – having sex at a sex club.

 “Take your clothes off.”

 He smirks and quickly tears off his jacket and shirt. “You too.”

 Klaus is down to his boxers when he sees she’s struggling with the top of her dress. He leans over and rips it down the middle, revealing her lacy corset.

 “You’re gonna have to pay Katerina back for that.”

 “Please don’t talk about Katerina at a time like this,” he says. She laughs but it quickly turns into a moan when he sucks a nipple into his mouth through the lace. He gently uses his teeth, and she arches into him as he unlaces her.

 He leans back to take his boxers off, and before he reaches for his discarded trousers, she leans forward and takes the head off him into her mouth, sucking lightly then harder, then lightly again.

 “Fuck. Do that again,” he says, a hand grasping her chignon.

 She pulls off and grins at him, “Say please.”

 He growls, literally growls. “Don’t play with me, Caroline.”

 “I thought you liked playing with me,” she lobbies back, faux innocent.

 She bobs back down his length, taking more of him this time, he starts a shallow thrust into her mouth. The gentle hand on her cheek, encouraging and feeling himself in her mouth, is so at contrast with the tight fist in her hair, guiding her up and down.

She hears him choke a little when he slides into her throat. She’s not sure why Klaus is surprised. If she puts her mind to be good at something, she works at it until she is. It just so happens when Caroline was in college, she decided to be great at blow jobs.

 He pets her hair gently now, loosening his grip. “I want to be inside you the first time.”

 She pops off and notices a couple watching them greedily a couch across from them, Klaus noticing them too.

 “Just so you know,” she says, “I don’t share.”

 “Good,” Klaus replies, taking a condom out his discarded wallet, and running it over his impressive length. “Neither do I.”

 Caroline straddles him again, slowly guiding him into her. She rolls her hips up and down taking a little more each time. She’s wet enough and it only takes a minute for him to be fully seated in her, their bodies as close as can be. They’re both breathing heavily already his hands going automatically to her hips as hers go to his shoulders.

 “Hi,” she whispers giving him a soft kiss.

 His eyes glow with happiness, and she loves that she was the one to put it there.

 They start at a gentle pace, hips slowly rolling over him, grinding her clit into his pelvis each pass. But the music playing is fast and the atmosphere too frenzied for slow and intense. There’ll be time for that later.

 Next thing she knows, her right leg is splayed out obscenely, her left behind her shoulder as Klaus drives into her over and over, her ass gripped in his hands for leverage.

 Their bodies are sweat soaked, she doubts she has any make-up on anymore, but can’t find it in her to care. Klaus tips his head back, groaning and she licks up his neck biting his earlobe as his thrusts falter, grabbing his hair with one hand.

 He pushes her leg up even higher, fingers going to her clit, rubbing over and over as she moans louder. She’s so slick that his fingers occasionally slip so she uses her free hand to help him.

 People are watching, she can feel their eyes. There’s something so salacious about it. Strangers watching them work together to find their pleasure, but she loves it, has never felt so high with someone before.

 “Klaus, I’m so close.” He uses their entangled fingers to increase the pressure and leans down to kiss her again, licking the roof of her mouth and biting her lips until she cries out. God, she wants that mouth on her.

 He lets go as she does. She’s so tight around him it’s almost painful, both of them groaning in relief and agonising ecstasy.  They hold each other as they slowly come down.

 After a few minutes, Klaus pushes himself up onto an elbow to look at her, searching her eyes for regret.

 But she doesn’t regret it. Maybe she will in the morning, but not now. She smiles at him playfully. “How long before you’re ready for round 2?”

   Round 2 happened, him fucking into her from behind one hand in her hair the other slapping her ass, but unfortunately Round 3 never came about. They still had an arrest to make. The party was dying down, sheepish guests putting their clothes back on before Klaus and Caroline approached Lucien, dragging himself off to bed.

 There were yells of brotherhood and betrayal as, to Caroline’s surprise, Elijah and Kat showed up to take him away. Kat’s eyes danced over her, saying ‘we are so talking about this later.’

 “You guys were friends for years,” she asks Klaus as he escorts her back to her hotel, walking arm-in-arm, her draped in his suit jacket to cover the torn dress, “aren’t you worried for him?”

 “I’m sure Marcel will throw him in that rinky-dink prison of his. It’s all very ethical,” he says, sounding almost disappointed.

 “Wait,” she stops in her tracks. “You know Marcel?”

 “Of course, I do, he was my protégé once upon a time. He never mentioned me? How heartbreaking.” He says this to her with the nonchalance he says most things, as if the extra knowledge about him isn’t shaking her whole world right.

 “So, you don’t just…kill people and drop them in the ocean?”

 “Only if they’re especially non-compliant,” Klaus winks at her.

 Caroline feels unexpectedly melancholy as they reach her hotel. Was this all just a one-time thing? And why should it sadden her so much if it is?

 Klaus, as if understanding exactly what she’s thinking, wraps his hands arounds her wrists and gently pulls them behind her back, holding her to him.

 “I have a mission,” he leans and kisses right behind her ear, that spot that makes her whole-body quake with need. How quickly he’s come to read her so well.

 “Next week,” a kiss to her cheek.

 “In Paris,” he lingers on the corner of her mouth.

 “We made quite the team.” The words hover over her lips. They’re so close that when she licks them, she licks his too. His pupils grow so large he looks supernatural, like he’s one moment from devouring her.

 “Come find me if you wish, Caroline. I’ll be waiting.” He lets her hands go and threads them through her tangled her, aligning her face to his. He kisses her once, twice, letting his tongue flicker against hers.

 Stepping back, he takes her palm and leaves a sweet kiss to the middle before taking off down the street, a skip in his step.

 “I am so screwed.”

  Showered and looking more respectable than this morning, Caroline goes to brunch with Bonnie and Kat, a pleasurable burn in her thighs from last night.

 They debrief as they usually do, moving on to lighter topics but Caroline can’t handle the inane conversation. She has to confess.

 “I slept with Klaus,” she blurts out. Kat and Bonnie, turn to stare at her, the butter Bonnie was about to spread on her toast, slopping onto the table.

 “Don’t look at me like that! Yes, I know we’re basically arch enemies,” she says, speaking even faster than usual, “But I don’t know, I kind of like him. And if you hate me, I get it! But that doesn’t mean I’m sorry cause I’m not.”

 Bonnie’s mouth is still agape, but Kat just laughs.

 “Oh cupcake. When you didn’t immediately return to the hotel after the mission, I figured you and Klaus had a little fun at Luxure.”

 “You knew what that place was? Why didn’t you tell me?”

 “For fun. It’s not like the mission was compromised,” Kat lifts her tea to take a sip, “Only you were.”

 Bonnie breaks out of her trance to snort a laugh.

 “Besides, once Bonnie contacted me and said you and Klaus made it out with the intel, good job by the way, I went for a drink with Elijah.”

 Bonnie’s shock is back as her head swivels to Kat. “Elijah Mikaelson?”

 “Yes. And in the interest of honesty, we’ve been sleeping together on and off for the past two years.”

 Caroline can’t help but laugh. Of course, Katerina has been sleeping with their not-so-much-anymore-enemy. That explains why they’re always on the same damn missions.

 “Then I guess you know about Paris next week?”

 “I do, you volunteering Forbes?”

 “I…think I might,” she says with a smile. Klaus is still a ruthless agent, but there’s clearly more there than meets the eye, it can’t hurt to give him a shot. If there just so happens to be a repeat of last night, all the better.

 “If we’re all confessing things then I have something to say,” Bonnie says, clearing her throat.

 “This should be good,” Kat replies.

 “Kol and I worked together on the cameras last night, ended up in the same coat closet, you know how it is.” She says, sounding unusually nervous. “Once we saw you and Klaus made it to the lobby, and the job was done, we kinda…had sex. Multiple times.”

 “What?” Caroline shrieks, Bonnie puts her head in hands and mumbles something about ‘not judging.’

 “Oh waiter!” Kat calls, “Can we get some drinks over here? We need to make a toast to the Mikaelson brothers.”

//

Also on AO3

[winbutlerscowbell]

Terminator Dark Fate Analysis Mexico Edition

Welcome to the Terminator Dark Fate Analysis Mexico Edition, where I’m going to dissect, comment and give my constructive criticism at every reference, landscapes, locations and well, everything that goes Mexican in this movie of ours.

  First things first: I just realized the version delivered to the mexican theaters is DIFFERENT to the rest of the world, why? Because the characters who originally speak Spanish are DUBBED AGAIN, like double dubbed. So ironically, in Mexico we couldn’t get to hear precious things like “no mames”, WE WERE DAMN ROBBED.

OK HERE WE GO:

That bridge is sending me, it really looks like a bridge from here or vial distributor like they call it in a more elegant way.

No, forget it. That kind of bridge doesn’t exist here but nice try, I appreciate that.

Here’s where something really funny starts because what they say doesn’t match with the subtitles at all hahaha 

The girl says “no mames” and it’s subtitled to “Oh my God” AND it was dubbed as “No inventes” hahaha this can’t be...

And here, the guy says “yo siento lo mismo”, it’s subtitled as “I feel it too” which is accurate but when they dubbed it they went with “¿y esos ojos?” lmao

Can’t forget to mention this ICONIC scene, of course.

The moment when the cops arrive reminds me of the meme where there’s some thiefs robbing something and the cops are asleep but there’s someone naked or doing something else and a fucking troop arrives, here is one example of the meme I’m talking about:

kidnappers - cops asleep, thiefs - cops asleep,narcos - cops asleep,an old lady selling flowers - the fucking troops.

"¿Qué le pasó a tu amiga, wey?" the cop saying this hahahsha lmao like I said WE WERE FUCKING ROBBED.

The girl saying “qué pedo wey” when they’re arresting her hahah, I actually predicted at least one “que pedo” would be said in this movie and finally I can see my prediction turned out to be true #SamPatchVidente

The casa de papel guy aka the cop is going to be beaten the shit out for wanting to take Grace to the ministerio publico.

Cops getting beaten the shit out of them: oil on canvas 

And here’s the first mistake: the patrols have signs saying “policia municipal” and “cdmx” (Mexico City). In real life that’s impossible as “policia municipal” (municipal police) is one thing and “cdmx” is a totally different city, patrols can’t have both things but hey, the design is spot on.

"Eso estuvo padrísimo wey" hahsha lmao this time I prefer the dubbing where they go with “eso estuvo padrísimo, güera”, cause I like when they call Grace güera.

Never in my life I imagined I’d be alive to see this piece of art: Mackenzie with “Sí señor” playing in the background. The first time I saw this I was losing my shit even more cause Mackenzie was somewhere in the same room, probably watching the scene too. This is so powerful, wow.

This is sending me hashaha, in the dubbed versión the guy shouts at her “pinche gringa ratera” (fucking gringa thief or something) and it’s translated to “Go to hell lady” come on hahahaha so I prefer that over the original version, damn it I wish I could have a hybrid version of this cause is gold.

The heroic CDMX, fuck yessss! I would have loved to see the Popocatepetl. I’d like to think the suavicrema is in the background, so maybe is Chapultepec?. So what is a suavicrema? Could be like a brand of ice cream wafer and that tall building in the background looks like one, lol. Omg, ok I’ll stop.

Next: we can see doña pelos in here cooking her food. Doña pelos or doña lupe is how we call every lady who sells food in the street, so for practical effects this lady is doña pelos.

Here’s the proof we call them like that:

It translates: “So doña pelos is taking marketing courses” cause she’s using an Adobe logo to promote her food of the day, which is “adobo de cerdo” hahaha

Let’s move on.

No, it’s not “do you want your tamal”, it’s “tortita de tamal” aka the famous guajolota, that’s what she’s asking. A guajolota is “a sandwich composed of a tamal placed inside a bolillo or telera, which is a rounder version of a bolillo.” Yes, I got it from Wikipedia, don’t judge. 

Also, a lady selling garnachas (like quesadillas, etc.) AND tamales? That’s new.

She also sells mangos? Wowowowow that’s versatility. 

And “le robo un manguito” “can I steal a mango?” Dani, you have to pay for that, you can go to jail for like 30 years, I’m serious, remember the meme of the cops?

Someone said she may be a prostitute and I can’t even…so you can’t dress with whatever you want? But also I’m a little suspicious and she actually may be one depending on what zone is Dani supposed to live. 

A pink cab! I thought it was a Nissan Tsuru because they always are but this time it’s not. Missed opportunity, production design team. 

“Let’s put Frida Kahlo to emphasize this is Mexico, what a good idea , why not?” 

Multifamiliar o vecindad? we're about to find out.

Why does she have a bike hanging on the wall? Is that a thing? 

The fruit on the table, the vase, and the squared table cloth, that evoked things in me.

About the music: I mean, it’s okay they put latin music but I am fucking sick to death of this Bomba Estereo song, I fucking hate it. There, I said it.

147 likes, that’s how excited the guys who think they’re Dj’s or something are when they upload things to soundcloud. 

One thing I don’t understand is: if they live in Mexico City, why are they talking in english now? Did I miss something? 

Never seen anyone in my life name a dog “Taco”, only “Chilaquil” but that’s another story.

Arturitooo from la casa de papel! or how I like to call him: el cñor <3 (it means señor but with a c because it sounds the same).

Interestingly, now there are two actors from la casa de papel appearing here hahaha 

LMFAO that’s a flagrant fucking typo: “tomalito” hahshaha that’s an unforgivable mistake. It’s “tamalito” obviously. 

Now, what’s up with the serape blanket on the wall? Hahaha we call them sarapes but come on, we’re not like that…well yeah but no… It would have been funny if the serape had a drawing of the last dinner hahaha that would have triggered childhood memories.

The cñor from la casa de papel is going to the imss for his medical check up. Imss is a horrible public health institution but that’s what we have so…

Ok, this is GOLD: the serape blanket, a picture of la Virgen de Guadalupe, the couch covered with sheets and ANOTHER serape blanket, the sewing machine hahaha they missed the calendar from the fruit store or the butch shop, damn haha

Did taco survive? I guess not :(

Also when Diego sings: Y’all, you could have saved some good money by picking up another song, I mean, it’s a beautiful song by Juan Gabriel but I heard it was very expensive and now in retrospective you could have saved something in this little simple thing.

So it’s a vecindad I guess.

And how did they hang the clothes in the middle? :v Can these people fly? That would be a Mexican super power to take advantage of the maximum possible space. 

  Un viejo encueradooooo, tápese cochino.

A green bussssss!!! We call them microbuses and the location gives me historical downton vibes because of all the people in the street. 

Oopppp another pink cab, I love it. 

I am the only person on this planet who is excited to see those microbuses in this movie, yes I am. 

I FINALLY KNOW WHAT THE ROUTE OF THE MICROBUS SAYS! It says "LAGO DE GUADALUPE, E. ZAPATA" WHICH IS INCORRECT HAHAHAHA. Also, the man with the hat hahaha it’s Mexico City not Monterrey.

Lago de Guadalupe is not in Mexico City and “E. Zapata” maybe is the subway station but they’re absolutely not close to each other, well let’s move on. 

 The casa de papel guy aka Dani’s dad is speaking with a heavy spanish accent tbh

And... Goodbye Mr. casa de papel :(

They make it look as if everybody works there, it’s not a little town, you know?

Why the fuck is an employee riding a bike inside the factory? I don’t get it. 

When diego says "chale" hahaha same.

"Un robot, que chido eh" hahaha chido and it’s subtitled as "it's cool" adjka god help me please.

El señor Sánchez represents me.I mean, there was a little bit of criticism because all the mexicans represented here are white but hey, try looking for someone who looks like a mexican in damn Europe, they did the best they could.

Aaaagain: if they are in Mexico City, why the hell are they talking in english? I’ll never understand.

Typical police guy distracted with the damn phone, yes we are in Mexico.

That policeman looks like Burt Reylonds (?)

Wish Grace would’ve arrived in that microbus hahahaha

That microbus is weird, nope I don't know her. 

That microbus has the same route as the previous one but it has something else under “E. Zapata”, like “Tecnologico” or something like that, ooofff maybe it’s Tecnologico de Monterrey hahaha that college is kinda near Lago de Guadalupe so haha ok, let’s keep going. 

Another distracted cop, my Mexico.

I love how Grace beats cops everywhere, this is an irrelevant scene for this analysis but I just love it so much.

Back to the factory: "Qué hace aquí tu jefe?" jasjdd "que haces aquí, jefe", the slang is on point here haha

"Olvidaste tu comida mijo" jasdjkhd

"Me quieren reemplazar por esa pinche máquina" apparently translates to a "they’re replacing me with that damn machine" jaksdj at least put a “fucking” or something.

Again that heavy spanish accent with that deep voice, hmmm

I’m going to ignore the Factory fight because there’s no Mexican stuff here.

Well, Diego and Dani keep saying “vámonos” and they don’t fucking leave haha

“GET IN” and Dani saying "ya güera ya güera" jakdhakjd I love her

Pink cab is saved from being destroyed by Grace.

Here comes the policía municipal to spoil everything. 

Ok, my theory is they are in the limits of Mexico City and the metropolitan area aka the state which is also a kinda not very good looking place and omg hahaha I love that.

Here’s when Diego slips an almost inaudible “no mames”, I know I heard it.

And well, THANK YOU GOVERNOR OF MEXICO CITY BECAUSE THE PATROLS ARE NOT THE SAME COLOR AND THEY’RE NOT ACCURATE ANYMORE, THANK YOU FOR SPOILING EVERYTHING.

These are our patrols now:

Ugh.

Noooo the tacos :( this really hurt a lot.

This is where I think they enter a highway called “circuito exterior mexiquense” that effectively connects the metropolitan area of the state with Mexico City and I LOVE IT. I love everything, do I?

Also some say the Rev-9 is driving a snow plow truck, is it? The only time it has snowed in Mexico City was in 1967, a long time ago.

Everything is screaming “circuito exterior”, yes I’m getting those vibes and I’m here for it.

Another pink cab is seen. Fun fact: because of its pink and white colors, we call them “hello kittys” and before that they were like wine color and gold so we called them “iron man”.

“FASTER GO FASTER”  Grace: “shut the fuck up, dummy”  and giving looks that could kill.

Hahahaha those license plates are so damn old and they say “Chihuahua” and “Guanajuato” ahaha doesn’t make very much sense.

The car of my friend hahaha

The truck behaving like my friend’s car.

Here’s where as a mexican citizen who used to drive every day in that highway, I detected some continuity details in the pursuit scene: 

ROAD SIGN 1: Nextlalpan/Jaltenco haha on the opposite side of the road.

ROAD SIGN 2: Querétaro/Toluca/Tultitlán on the right side they’re driving

ROAD SIGN 1 again: first mistake fellas, now the sign is in the lane where they’re driving.

ROAD SIGN 3: Ecatepec/Texcoco, how do I know? I just do.

ROAD SIGN 4: This is my fave because in this one there's my shitty town hahaha SALIDA LECHERIA-TEXCOCO AV.JOSE LOPEZ PORTILLO Y COACALCO hahaha

It really looks like the circuit, I drive there a lot of times and Grace was there, destroying everything :')

ROAD SIGN 4: My fave sign now is on the opposite side, mistake number two.

Each and every one of the times I went to the theaters to watch this movie, in this scene everyone was like "ohhhh what? omg nooo" 

ROAD SIGN 4: Mistake number 3, the sign of Lecheria is shown again when the Grace truck had already passed there on the other side of the road.

ROAD SIGN 2: There's again the sign of Queretaro/ Toluca/Tultitlan when Grace's truck has already driven over there.

ROAD SIGN 5: Toluca/Lago de Guadalupe, remember? Lago de Guadalupe,  just like the microbus route sign.

ROAD SIGN 5: Just because I love to see Mackenzie with those signs in the background hahaha

Anyway, the circuito exterior mexiquense is a fucking mess and of course I love it.

Dani, I wouldn't go to the police either, they’re a bunch of useless idiots and I'm sure they would blame YOU for everything and get you into jail for 40 years.

Really bitch? RECETA MEDICA AJSDKASDK he's asking her for a prescription lmao her face I can’t...

Also I always wondered how Grace understood the pharmacy guy but now I know that in the version brought up here, this guy was dubbed to spanish while in the original version he spoke english, those little differences and  I’ll never understand why they did it.

Typical guy filming the mess hahaha 

"Qué pasa güera" traduced to "what the hell", nice (not actually)

That looks like a little town but God knows where is it, eww

Sure, we all have an uncle who is a coyote (no, not true). We call them polleros, not coyotes but whatever.

"Ojalá ustedes no fueran tan blancas" "I wish you two weren't so white" hasjdaj Love it.

So they're going to the famous BESTIA (beast), that's the nickname of the train because it's so huge.

I'm laughing hard because in some sites they called this scene "train station scene" hahaha this is everything but a train station haha ffs

Fun fact: I see that train everyday just without migrants, I think they ride the train in other certain places. This is a pic a took of the real bestia:

LOS HEROES TECAMAC JAJAJAJAJA lmao lmao I can't fucking believe it jasjdkaja the little shitty town close to mine LOVE IT

Ciudad Valles jaskdja

Ciudad Victoria.

China??? wtf now that's just random places.

EDIT: Someone replied to his post and told me it’s a place in Nuevo León and yes it is, CHINA, Nuevo León Mx. close to Ciudad Victoria AND LAREDO. And this means I don’t know my country enough. Gracias @vickysan24​

Is this supposed to be Guanajuato? when on earth they went to Guanajuato? I need to talk to Sonja Klaus asap

Mackenzie saying "hola" is one of the best things that could've ever happened to me.

ahhh the food jasjdja has a lemon in it, I don't know, could be sincronizadas? hahahsha I think it’s eggs and beans with pico de gallo.

Mastering the skill of grabbing the tortilla like a spoon, nice. She has my seal of approval.

cartel de Sinaloa... really?! I really don't know what to think about this one...come the fuck on.

So that's how they cross huh, they keep putting walls but people always will find a way.

La migra got them:(

I’m going to do a big skip here. The border patrol and the detention center are next and key in the story but I don’t really know how can I bring something new in this analysis, maybe I’ll try later.

Next: When they find Carl.

For a looong time I really thought those beers were Corona and now it turns out they weren’t, sad day but oh well there are much better beers out there, so... *nail polish emoji*

Is that... MOLE DE LA COSTEÑA???? JAJAJSJAJD Did you think I wasn’t going to see that?! That’s a great product placement.

And another picture of la Virgen de Guadalupe.

I'm far from being an expert but i'm not sure if we drink beer like that, with the lemon in the bottle.

Another beer?  Yes, thank you.

Even Grace is not sure if beer is drank in that way.

But beer with lemon and salt is everything, I admit it.

Ok, fast forward, no mexican things until the very end;

"Mataste todo lo que quería cabron" jsadkhdjha what a delight! and it’s been translated to "you took everything I had, bastard" lmao yeah, right. Sounds better in spanish, obviously.

Yes people, only a mexican can throw herself to a Terminator and fight with it with her own bare hands.

And to finish this deep analysis, I want to point the great originality (sarcasm on) they had with some character names: Diego Boneta is Diego, Alicia Borrachero aka Carl’s “wife” is called Alicia and at some point the Rev-9 is called Gabriel, like hmm ok, I remember Diego Boneta’s character was rumored to be named Miguel but yeah it was just a rumor. Ohhh and the lady selling tamales her real life name is yes, you guessed it: Mona.

If you’re reading this, I want to thank you for getting this far, for taking your time and I hope this “little analysis” helped you to understand some things better about the movie that maybe you’ve missed in your viewings or to discover new things about Mexico. Did I miss something? Let me know what you think.

[the-coolest-mallard]

Like a Kickass Guy | ASC

Louie gets high at Mei’s party and texts Nemo and Tae.

@justkeepdancing-nemo​ @moon-yeongtae​

Louie: holy shit u guyyyyyy Louie: shit has been going dowwwwwwwwn. Or upside down? down and up really lol Louie: i may not have muscles n shit but guess WHAT I DID Tae: hulked out and killed someone? Louie: woah man no! Duuuuuude have u seen me? impossible Louie: i'm too cute to go to jail yet Louie: i mean EVER Louie: im too cute to go to jail EVER Louie: did a keg stand lol. sorta Tae: whoa nice Tae: how you feelin? Louie: a m a z i n g Louie: you won't BELIEVE how good i am Louie: i felt like IRON - no. i felt like CAPTAIN AMERICA. LIKE A KICK ASS Louie: GUY Tae: nice dude i'm glad ur having fun Tae: is mark there Louie: he was here somewhere. he asked me to come Louie: dunno where he went. maybe he's with johnny idk Louie: but who cares lol Louie: i'm great Louie: no more sads Tae: wow you're really drunk huh? Louie: nooooooooooooo Louie: haha I was gonna drink Louie: but then this weird girl showed up Louie: and now i'm super

Tae: but you said you did a keg stand Tae: that's like drinking isnt it? Louie: is it? i thought it was just a hand stand on a keg lol Louie: who knows? not me Tae: i mean i guess Tae: what weird girl Louie: idk blond. weird. she wanted me to CHEAT ON MARK WTF Louie: i mean she seriously helped me out but also Louie: wtf Louie: weird. so weird. but we went to the bathroom and she Louie: gave me t his stuff n i'm like Louie: wow i mean i can't stop talking Louie: i think I've said some seriously stupid shit Tae: wait Tae: what? Louie: what? i didn't tell you anything stupid did I? Louie: i don't think i did. thank god. imaigngi f i told u that Louie: lololol i'd die forever Tae: louie what are you taking about what stuff Louie: stuff? which stuff Louie: im not tellig Tae: what did she give you Louie: ohhhhhhhhhhh Louie: oh i can tell u that haha Louie: she called it all kinds of weird stuff like snow white or whatever which is bizarre af but whatever Louie: i like sniffed it and it felt super whack Tae: LOUIE WHAT THE FUCK Louie: and then it was like Louie: wow Louie: idk man i wanted to not feel sad and i feel good now Tae: holy shit what the fuck i cannot believe Tae: louie that was so dumb Louie: you're so dumb! Louie: no that's not true Louie: you're my faovriedgof person ever Tae: where the fuck is nemo why isn't he here to tell you how stupid that was where are you Tae: you're at mei's right Louie: yeh i crashed lol Louie: well no mark and johnny wanted to crash Louie: and since mark's been cool and let me stay at his place i was like Louie: well i should probs go Tae: yeah well THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD'VE FUCKING DONE COKE OR WHATEVER YOU DID jesus fuck Nemo: wait wtf did i just read Tae: yeah Tae: i have to go fucking get him Louie: why are you maddddd? im not bugging anyone! i'm having fun! Nemo: wait whats going on! Nemo: louie are you okay? Louie: i'm FINE Louie: i'm super Nemo: he did cocaine? Louie: super human Tae: he's at mei's party and he fucking YES Louie: you could say Louie: ughhh stop making this so big Tae: do you know how many kids my brother had to see in the hospital bc of drugs louie? Nemo: yeah that stuffs really bad Nemo: its human chemicals Nemo: do you feel okay? are you dizzy? Louie: do you know what else is bad? life. being sad. freddie mercury leaving too soon. presidents. earthquakes Nemo: louie D: Louie: tthe hunger games Tae: hey louie seriously how are you feeling like Tae: in your body Louie: that's a weird thing 2 akks dud Louie: im fine! Tae: okay but like Tae: if u close ur eyes and like idk try to feel what's happening like is your heart beating really fast? do you feel like puking? do you feel like you're moving? Louie: oh i mean yeah lol Louie: my heart is skipping faster n when i Louie: wait i gotta shut up shut up Nemo: tae yah is that bad? Nemo: would jun hyung know? Tae: i'm asking him right nwo Louie: so fussy you guys are fussy im gooood Nemo: louie just keep texting u ok Louie: look how good i am Louie: 

Nemo: very pretty Tae: yeah gorgeous how's your breathing Louie: wouldnt u like 2 kno Louie: how's your butt Louie: bet its still kicckable Tae: you have literally never kicked my ass at anything Tae: nemo does your appa know about this stuff? you probably shouldn't ask him huh? Louie: DON'T AOISFJPDOGN Nemo: its human drugs Nemo: so not really Louie: 4 THE LOV OF GOD Louie: that guy lredy probs haaaaaates me Nemo: his magic wouldnt work either i dont think Louie: im a toxin to freidn parnets Nemo: yeah if he ever finds out we woudl be banned from being in the same school i think he'd transfer me to that catholic place and appa hates catholicism Nemo: this is why you shouldnt do drugs louie :heart: dont yu wanna keep being my friend Louie: :cry: :cry: :cry: Louie: you're my best mate wgodidpsdggdfh Louie: you too tae Tae: wow rude Tae: oh okay Louie: wow Louie: dont be such a bitch tae Tae: well you started it when you did cocaine Louie: i used to think u were the coolest but maybe  im demoting u n promoing Louie: nemo Louie: nemo ur the new hottie Tae: the what Louie: what? Tae: louie i'm coming to get you Louie: whyyyyy the partys still partying Louie: ppl be FITIN Louie: man ud fit right in with your muscle bod Louie: well cept one fitghts girls Tae: where are you in the house Louie: idk the dance place. the life space Louie: where everyone is? Nemo: is jun going too? Nemo: aghaldkfjaskldfj Tae: yeah Louie: wait wait wait wait wait Nemo: ugh im sorry i cant be there Louie: where u going Nemo: louie im so sorry just keep texting us Louie: no Louie: i should dkslefadkad Tae: hey louie what's your favorite queen song Louie: skedlolde Louie: what? ohhhhh wow tough choice man i mean Louie: there are soooo many good SONGS Louie: lately i've been listening 2 somebody to love a lot cause i been dfpsogdpsjsd Louie: buuuuuut Tae: i like don't stop me now Louie: that's my OTHER FAVORITE Louie: man u vibe so well with me i hate it Louie: ha ha ha Louie: j k this is why we're bffs Nemo: hey queen was on the CD you gave me Nemo: ive been listening to it! Louie: reallyyyyy? did you like it? Louie: hey hey tae tae. taeeeeeeee. tae you should send a slefdie Louie: slefit Louie: sel fie Nemo: course! i love it Nemo: maybe i'll pick a song and choreo a dance for it Tae: you want a selfie? Louie: oooooo yes please nemo Louie: and def yes pls tae Louie: do smehthing cute Nemo [deleted]: ugh louiealkf Nemo: where's mark again? Nemo: im gonna text mark Louie: idkkkkkkk Tae: 

Louie: he went to do some stuff with johnny Louie: woahhhhhhhhh Louie: waogdisjdpsgjosg Louie: shit Tae: that's me coming to get ur dumb ass Louie: wait ur coming to get me? Louie: shit shit shit wait i gotta skedoled Louie: skedadled Tae: what? Louie: well much as i think ur great im ok Louie: also i thinkk hoooo shit Louie: gotta ifnd a window lol Tae: louie if you don't stay there i will fucking murder you Tae: i'm serious Louie: deth by tae or tdeth by uncle d when he fins out Louie: shit mn if i stay its a double featur Nemo: :/ Nemo: please louie, we're worried about you Nemo: we love you! we just want to make sure you're okay Tae: yeah Tae: you're gonna stay the night with me okay Louie: oh god Tae: it'll be great Louie: hahaahahahahahaha Louie: N E M O Louie: tell him why i suddenly Louie: sgosigdsgsdg Nemo: louie  i think you should Nemo: um drink water Louie: im good ill just find Louie: makr Louie: mark Nemo: that's also good please find mark Louie: n go to his place? Tae: what did i say Nemo: nothing he's on drugs Tae: i said stay put Louie: im really good thouuuugh Louie: n mark will look out for me Louie: marks nce Tae: well mark left u alone and you did cocaine so i mean not that that's his fault i'm just saying Nemo: ugh what if mark did cocaine Nemo: u dont think mark did cocaine did he Louie: dont blae me him 4 ME BEING ME Tae: DID MARK DO COCAINE Louie: honestly i dont dieossgodkh Louie: NO Tae: fuck Nemo: he might not have! we dont know Louie: i dont deesrve mrk naywayl ol Tae: nemo never do cocaine please Nemo: i cant see mark lee doing cocaine unless someone told him it was fun dip Louie: he n johnny were just doing fun stuff 2gether Tae: lmfao Nemo: id probably DIE if i did cocaine so dont worry ahha Nemo: big no no for fairies Louie: speaking of immenditd death Louie: we sure windows r no go Nemo: which is why u shouldnt do it solidarity c'mon louie Tae: if you aren't there when i get there i will be very upset Nemo: he will be Nemo: wont u louie Louie: im scared i dont want the lady 2 yell at me Louie: pls i wanna leave Tae: I'm almost there Louie: DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD= Louie: what if i hid in the bathroom Nemo: its gonna be okay louie :heart: Nemo: just um, sing a little queen Louie: no its not ill be ded 4ever n dragged home n stuck with my asshole fam n never escape n ded Nemo: you won't be dead you'll be safe Louie: shit someone said its the COPS Louie: im double triple dead Louie: n thats bullshit Louie: my fam isnt safe they suuuuuuuck Tae: WHERE ARE YOU Tae: fuck there are so many people Louie: trapped in the prison of xistance Louie: a house of horrs Louie: horors Tae: i'm serious louie i can't find you Louie: just make urself taller Louie: ill see you Tae: i'm gonna yell for you Louie: ok ok ok Nemo: ugh fksjf

[dndfuckhouse]

Session 19 - your majesty, i present to you the vengaboys

> 🎵  Pianissimo Epilogue / Silent Hill 2 OST

Returning to our tale, the group have all found respite in Vorde’s temporary abode in Shorewater, resting up and recovering from the night's events. Soon morning comes, though with the curtains shut as they are, it's a bit hard to tell that it's now daylight outside as they all slowly come too.

Peering about the group dont spot Vorde about, supposing he’s still in his room. Feeling a hankering for breakfast, Keva and Psalm wander over to the small dining table in the room and the fruit still piled upon it, chowing down. Psalm continues looking at the tome they stole yesterday as he does, continuing to copy runes and scan for any more information as he does.

Keva: keva is cuttin up an apple into slices with a small knife, giving some to amos and setting some aside and occasionally eating a slice Psalm: i'm just cooling at this breakfast table

Rokka begins his morning stretches, Finn sees this and decides to join him as well, Han watches and secretly does her own stretches, trying to not seem as if she wants to join in.

Plum: WHY Han: issues ! Plum: LMFAO Rokka: did our near death experience not bring us closer

In the meantime Plum and Cimmorro prepare their spells for the day, either via quick study or short prayer. Seemingly done with her stretches, Han comes over and joins the two at the dining table to eat (she hoards some of the food after everyone's had some). As the group go about their activities Orin eventually ambles out of him and Finn’s room somewhat drowsy, he takes a seat at the table next to psalm and takes a bite of an apple.

Psalm: good morning orin Rokka: i am crushing an apple in my mouth whole Orin: "mornin'" he looks like hes about to continue but rokka eating an apple whole makes him go : 0 though he quickly sneaks one of Keva’s slices after. Keva: an apple a day keeps the Chip: cult away Psalm: CLEARLY IT DONT

Han heads over to the window to the balcony briefly and opens the curtain ever so slightly to peer outside, looking down she sees the fenced garden of the building, a few birds flitting about in the branches of trees. Craning her head to try and look at the street she doesn't see anybody around. Out of the corner of his eye Finn sees Han move the curtain slightly and quickly becomes on edge before realising all is fine.

Finn: 

Han: LKSAD;LKHFLKHAWEFDS Finn: grimaces @ han opening the curtain and moves slightly. Chip: like a cat Finn: yes! Chip: fur raised Finn: KHJSHEJEHLJ

After a time the group hear some shuffling from the door Vorde disappeared behind last night, it slowly creaks open revealing his form. He walks out and looks about the group of them idling about and rubs his eyes turning and walking to the dining table to also grab an AppleTM, he doesn't sit down though

Han: i am 100% imagining this strained awkward silence Psalm: is he gonna crush it in his bare hands, BAROK VON VORDE... Finn:😳 Han: chip what did we watch dgs FOR Chip: NO

Finn: "morning uncle" finn stares kinda wondering why hes not sitting down but thats not gonna ruin his day Vorde: "morning finnian, i hope waking during daylight hours isnt too much for you" his eyes look sleepy as he speaks Orin: orin swallows his apple and speaks up "take a seat boss!" Vorde: he shakes his head in response "need to stand for a while for the blood to return to my legs" Finn: finn cant help but smile at that and responds "mm not exactly pleasant but i can manage. did you stay up?"

As the two chat Keva takes the moment to go take a quick morning bath, bringing Amos into the bathroom with her to give him a clean as well. Orin watches her take the rat into the bathroom with a face of confusion.

Vorde: "good to know" he pauses "hmm yes, I’ve been working through the night on how to present our case to the royalty, im going to be needing you all to speak as well once were before the court, merely on the things that prove you weren't responsible for the assassinations. We've the evidence to back up our claims so im not too worried. Of course if the royalty calls upon you you're each to respond in kind as well.” Finn: source: trust me Han: han hmms

Vorde seems to stretch slightly after finishing his apple and finally takes a seat at the dining table with the others, crossing his legs as he sits. 

Vorde: “My plan is thus; gain entry to the palace and an audience with the royalty, once there reveal the truth that the Red Letterhead’s machinations are the true cause for all this strife and go from there, i intend to warn them that Theyord’s apparent plans are about to be put into motion soon as well” he glances back over at his room “i will be presenting and handing over the items we have procured this far, including the tome" he glances at you psalm "hopefully it will be proof positive enough, should the archmage be around she won't find ive anything to hide on the matter”

He takes a quick sigh and rubs one of his eyes “I'm not sure what the royals will decide after that, I imagine they will put further efforts in place regarding the protection of the city and its walls, they should in anycase. If we are free to walk after we can investigate madam Shelly Carter’s lead after, perhaps we may request aid for the task as well, though I'm sure they will be hard pressed to spare much after such a threat to the city has been revealed. They’ll want all hands on deck”

Finn: finn nods and just thinks "man my uncle is so smart and cool. what a solid plan." Cimmorro: 🤨 Plum:

Han: a lot seems to be hinging on the royals kind nature Vorde: true, they arent benevolent but i dont think they're idiots either. It would be hard to ignore the items we've gathered. As well as the presence of a time limit Han: .... not that we have a better plan, but were i in that position, i just throw us in jail, less loose ends Psalm: Here's to hoping they don't just jump to conclusions hm? ^_^ Han: "what might we think to do then" said at the group kinda Plum: dunno, never busted outta jail before

The group decide that if worse comes to worse they’d prefer to try and figure out a plan to jailbreak themselves rather than resist the guardsmen and die trying. They also bring up the fact that they still currently think the mayor and Vinny are still compromised or under Theyord’s influence, and to keep it in mind. Keva leaves the bath around soon after and rejoins the group discussion.

Vorde: he continues, blinking slowly “hmm yes i forgot to specify, we are going ahead with the prisoners plan. However it won't be good for me to parade you all through the street even if you are ‘restrained’, it would be best if we could appear right before the guardsmen at the palace so the closest place for them to lock you up if they decide too is within the palace itself. I should state if they do haul you away, I advise you not to resist, with the city on guard as it is it will be nigh impossible for you to escape anywhere. If I do my job right you will be out within half an hour I suspect and brought to the court if you are carted off, that is what I plan anyway.” he pauses "ill do my best to stick with you however" Han: HAN BREATHES A LONG BREATHE X2 Psalm: “Appreciated. Always good to have friends in higher places for this kind of thing, rather than muscle your way out of it “ @ han Han: neither of those things seem to go well for me Psalm: he just shrugs

Vorde: he unclasps his hands and continues speaking "speaking of, are any of carrying any rope on your person" Han: shibari time huh Cimmorro: bondage ti Keva: keva asks "what for" Vorde: aforementioned restraints

Cimmorro: "yall don't have rope in this house??" 🤨 Vorde: 🤨 vorde like no bro Cimmorro: damn ok sorry Chip: [cimm leaves the room] Cimmorro: KGJFLSDKJGKLSFG

Rokka hands Vorde a few lengths of rope from his pack to tie the group up with in their fake prisoners ploy, satisfied Vorde then tucks it away for later. He then brings up another concern he seems to have on his mind.

Vorde: he turns to you Finn with his brows furrowed “I am not sure...if I ought to bring you along Finnian. It is best we act swiftly which does mean leaving during daylight. You could stay here, though perhaps i ought to leave Orin with you. Best if you weren't alone after what happened a week back.” Finn: finn also furrows his brows and ponders his uncles words for a moment. "is it only because of the daylight uncle?" Vorde: he thinks for a moment "i suppose so"

Finn asks Orin to then go check and see how harsh the sunlight out today seems, he obliges, getting up to carefully sneak his way past the curtain as the group continue discussing the matter.

Han: han glances btwn vorde n finn quizzically "what happened a week ago" Finn: i exchange looks with vorde as to telepathically ask whos gonna answer her. Vorde: he looks at you finn and sighs before turning back to you han, tapping the table with one finger "when we first arrived in Shorewater and began poking around we were sent an uninvited visitor" Han: who Vorde: an assassin Han: han rolls her eyes "yes i got that but. any identifying features" Vorde: i found a letterheads token on him, though he was dressed as a guardsman. No ring so i assume he killed someone and stole their clothes to find passage to our room. Nothing else stood out about him. Han: han hmms thoughtfully Chip: geralt hmmm Han: yea, the energy im channelling today

Han: he didnt return and they didnt send anyone else to finish the job. cocky Vorde: [a nod] Psalm: or maybe with their ceremony on the horizon they decided they needed everyone focused on the same goal? Han: which is, in a word, cocky Psalm: sure if you want to put it that way

Han: "wait what did you do with the body" @ vorde Vorde: dumped in the sewers Han: han goes HHHRMMNH fwustwated

Orin returns and informs Finn and the gang that it appears to be cloudy out today, they should be good if Finn covers up with heavy cloaks. Finn thanks him and tells his uncle it should be alright for him to come with them, though he wouldn't mind staying back if that is what he preferred.

Vorde: vorde like hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm 

Psalm: “wouldn't it be safer to stick with a group in that case?” with his nephew there maybe he'll try harder to make things not go badly for us! 🙂 Plum: i also think it'd be kinda bad to be here alone, not like they didn't see us all runnin around Vorde: "i suppose it is better to stick together in this case" he looks at you finn "try not to horse around too much in the daylight" vorde worried parent mode engaged Finn: finn gives a big smile "got it!". >finn feels cared for friendship meter goes up Vorde: hmm, it would be more convincing in any case if i wasnt the only one bringing a group of fugitives to the palace. Finnian and Orin could make also have hold of the restraints.

Finn now assured that he is coming along, heads off into his room to quickly bulk up for the outside journey. Donning three three cloaks, the heaviest on top, thick black gloves and boots, a big sunhat and a scarf to protect his neck, he waddles back out into the main room where the party is situated.

Keva: keva's mouth seems to wiggle as she tries not to laugh Vorde: as you wander out and present yourself, vorde walks up to you and inspects your ensemble, after a moment he adjusts your scarf so it covers you mouth more and hmm's satisfied Orin: orin shouts a "looking good!" from across the room and snorts at keva Keva: keva shoots orin a look back like "what" and her smile breaks thru a little more before she fixes her face Plum: plum gives you a thumbs up Finn: "thanks uncle!!" finn beams @ vorde and looks at plum and orin and also shoots them a grateful smile

Vorde stretches again slightly, seemingly finally more awake then before, he informs the party to ready themselves to set off. They’ll get as close as they can to the palace before putting on the restrained charade, informing them they need to only disguise themselves well enough for a 5 minute walk through some alleys. Heading back into his room he begins preparing the evidence within his satchel and making himself presentable, the party following suit in trying to look conspicuous.

Keva: keva ties up her wet hair and pulls her hood and face mask up Han: han braids her hair and throws up cape too Psalm: (uses disguise kit) for good measure i just pull my hood up too Cimmorro: i'll just take off all the flashy jewellery and keep the hood up if that suffices Rokka: DISGUISE RING...

Rokka uses the disguise ring stolen from the letterheads to once again turn himself into a different human form, Chris Rokksworth, pop sensation. Plum asks the group if they oughta down the red potion they found earlier to change their hair colour.

Plum: can i just drink that weird potion and call it a day Han: angery ronand mcdoland Keva: 

Psalm: i don't see why not, i'm hard pressed to think of a better time to use it Han: han shrugs in a ye sure way Plum: [looking very excited] "ok yeah sure" i chug that shit

you pop open the red bulbous vial and drink the airy liquid. slowly youre hair turns red, additionally your tongue does as well. 

Rokka: cool hair plum Finn: i give a thumbs up back at plum for earlier.

Vorde walks out of the room once more, he almost seems surprised seeing Rokka as a person but doesn't comment, he also doesn't say anything about plums hair. Satisfied with the disguises he heads for the balcony window, informing them its better if theyre not all seen exiting the front. He slides open the curtains and clicks open the doors, peering out for witnesses before he motions for the group to all follow him as he hops down. Orin adjusts his cloak and follows quickly after.

Rokka: vorde am i hot, am i hot to u vorde

> 🎵  Aequilibrium. Medieval Tune. Hurdy-Gurdy With Organ / Andrey Vinogradov

The group quickly follow after the two sliding down the side of the building, though psalm seems to hitch his hooves on some stonework, nearly chipping them oww....his pedicure. The rest make it down quick enough and follow as Vorde begins leading the way through the shadowed alleys, as stealthily as they can to avoid detection from the increased patrols. Vorde keeping the lead and lookout helps the group manage to get by without sticking out too much.

Finally they all slowly come to a stop at an alley corner, as they come close they steal a glance at the palace, it looks as regal in the daylight as it did on the night the group all first stood before it, its peaks reaching high into the sky. The large light blue and white extravagant building dwarfs their forms, though it no longer has the inviting warm glow and festive aura as it did before. Guards stand alert and in a large number around the streets and on top of the walls, the main gates firmly shut with two royal guardsmen stationed in front of it at the top of the stairs leading up to it. Vorde quickly calls the group to attention.

Vorde: “follow my lead and don't put up too much of a fight, be sure to make sour enough faces to be convincing however, at least until you’re called before the court” he pulls the rope out of his satchel Keva: keva's face sours upon seeing the ropes come out no problem Han: hans been sour this whole time no worries bruv, i also keep a look out, like hans basically constantly alert and trying take in every little thing Psalm: psalm just stoic face as per usual, elevator music Rokka: im a celebrity im good at this, jk rokka is nervous af Plum: i always look kinda sour anyways Cimmorro: 😳 cimm like this Chip: cimm a freak like dat Psalm: LOOOL Cimmorro: oh no you caught mee, what ever shall i do, arrest this Plum: shut up shut up Han: cimm 😳 damn u pulling out ropes on the first date?

Vorde moves to hand some of the rope to Orin and they get to tying the six of the groups hands up, not too tightly but convincingly enough. He hands the rope holding Keva and Psalm off to Orin, and Han and Rokka to Finn, holding Plum and Cimmorro’s in his own. 

Vorde: "right then, plays about to begin, stay calm and follow my lead" he gives orin and finn both a nod Han: han nudges rokka to get his attention Rokka: tilts head at han ? Han: han points to vorde and makes a stupid face while pretending to talk seriously Rokka: rokka tries to stifle his laughs Finn: finn peeks out from under his scarf and squints Han: han stops immediately if she sees finn looking Rokka: rokka making snorting sounds from failing to not laugh Finn: I WAS GONNA WRITE THAT FINN HAS A SOMEWHAT APOLOGETIC LOOK BUT THEN YOU SENT THAT POKI Han: han is the picture of innocence Finn: finns rolls his eyes and turns his attention elsewhere

Psalm: well this works out pretty nicely doesn't it, since i've been kind of curious about you. Orin: he just raises a brow Keva: keva looks at psalm Psalm: he just smiles Ghester: [plays laughtrack.mp3 in ur head] Psalm: well i'm not the most learned person out there, but i was a bit curious how you came to start working for vorde is all Keva: you ask a lot of questions for someone who doesn't answer them Psalm: i think you're misunderstanding, i'm not asking anything. if i had an answer there'd be nothing to be curious about. Keva: keva makes a face like you're just saying words at her psalm Psalm: psalm just sighs Orin: “i dont mind telling you, its nothing special. Maybe after we get through court though" he looks back at you keva "no need to be so cagey about it really" Psalm: i highly doubt that it's nothing special. and i don't think there's been a time where she hasn't been cagey around me i think. Keva: oh don't go thinking you're special Psalm: oh i'm not? now i'm even more hurt  

Cimmorro: "so how are we feelin today" cimm attempts to nudge plum gently but ends up hitting their head with his elbow accidentally,  oh shit sorry your wig Plum: [GROANS REALLY LOUDLY] Cimmorro: well at least we're able to play the sour part of this play eh, all according to keikaku [editors note: keikaku means plan] Plum: always, not hard with this group Cimmorro: agreed. hey at least we're having the thrill of our lives eh? who knew we'd have a one way trip to life sentence. free! Plum: i honestly.... Cannot tell if you're joking Cimmorro: 

Plum: [plum laughs] Vorde: while looking for a chance to head out of the alley he listens to the two of you like : | Cimmorro: vorde not being paid enough by the hour to baby sit cimm

Rokka: dont make me laugh im trying to be nervous Han: "whats there to be nervous about, really" han has a weak smile lmao Rokka: life sentence Han: "just gotta break out then" nudges rokka again Rokka: "ur right. ur so smart han" rokka visibly relaxes as he talks to han more aha Han: han laughs quietly "wish i had someone nice like you for a sibling instead of shitheads" Rokka: no stopping that now Han: after han finally Gets it, shes trying not to look like [crying emoji] then looks away kinda shy? "...they arent. complete shitheads......... i think you would get along nicely with'em" Finn: finn eavesdropping @ han, inch resting Rokka: I'd love to meet them one day if we make it out of this Han: "we will. i have to knock the life out of one of them" han smiles Rokka: how many siblings do you have Han: han loses her smile a touch and hesitates a sec b4 answering "...two now." Rokka: now..? Vorde: out of the corner of your eye you all see vorde come to attention and speak "its as empty as it'll be, nows the time to get as far as we can. were on" he shoots you all a glance. Rokka: rokka shoots a quick concerned glance at han before facing forward again

Vorde pulls the two behind him ahead on the ropes and marches proudly into the street, walking at a speedy pace followed by Orin and Finn, the group gets as far up the stairway to the main gates as possible before the entourage is spotted by the various nearby royal guardsman.

Immediately they hear a few shouts ahead of them as the two royal guards by the door call out to Vorde to halt, looking the group also notice the guards on the walls train arrows on their forms. Behind, nearby guards quickly run up to flank the group, surrounding them.

Keva: keva tenses up as the guards approach Han: han too, also making note of fucking everything, how many people, exits, all that shit Rokka: rokka also does the tense Plum: plum stands a little closer to cimm and vorde Psalm: psalm is also just scoping the place out for good measure

Vorde: he clears his throat before speaking loudly and plainly “I, Vorde Barvotte of Antessa, have found and bring to you now, the assassins and wanted fugitives responsible for the carnage during the Elfonsent Ball but not a few nights ago” he continues a little less loudly with his brow furrowed “I bring grave news regarding their actions and future plans of attack on the city, i demand to be brought before the nobility and kings at once to relay this pertinent information immediately” the two royal guardsman in front of him pause for a moment and eyeball the group behind him bound in ropes.

Han appears to get the stink eye specifically from one of the guardsmen before the guard on the right, presumably the guard captain speaks up.

Guard Captain: “there are only 5 assassins left alive to my knowledge 'good' sire, and wasn't one of em' a lupin?” she turns her head to the other guard as if to ask for confirmation, he nods his head. Vorde: he clasps his hands together before responding “it appears you were not thorough enough in your investigation of the body then guard captain, it is of dire importance this error is rectified wouldn't you agree? as for the second question" he looks over at finn and gestures for him to bring chris rokksworth pop sensation forward Han: pop sensation chris rokksworth cant be bad! hes a star! Rokka: silly! hes just getting into his new movie role!

Finn brings Rokka forward as prompted by Vorde, reaching for Rokka’s bound hands Vorde pulls off the ring shifting his form immediately back to his lupin one.

Vorde: "These assassins are crafty wouldn't you say, hiding their faces to avoid detection." he gives you a quick look rokka that to you seems like hes saying gj bro Rokka: rokka just makes a surprised face :OOOOOOO

Satisfied, Vorde turns curtly and pushes Rokka back to where he was standing before, turning back to the guard captain. She squints at him and then quickly turns and raises her arm, ordering the nearby guardsman to examine the tied up members of the party for any weapons.

Han: han probably has all her weapons on her.... she grits her teeth over this lol, han glaring dagger into whoever has her stuff lmao Rokka: [nooo dont confiscate my swords] Keva: keva scowls as a guard approaches her and pats her down Han: eat shit copper

Orin tries to give Keva and Psalm placating looks throughout the process while not being obvious. The six members of the party have all their physical weapons removed from their persons. The guardsman on the right clears her throat seemingly satisfied with her appraisal and shouts at the guards on the walls to lift the gates, as she does Vorde gives the group a barely noticeable nod and continues speaking.

Vorde: “I must be bring them all before the nobility themselves as soon as possible, their testimony will be important for what i am to tell the royalty, i cannot explain their actions without them and the imminent threat to the city without them”  Guard Captain: she responds with a curt “you want to bring assassins before the kings for a second time?” Vorde: they are bound and weaponless, they couldn't hurt more than a fly as they stand now, beaten and docile. I'm sure you’ve a great manner of ways to check before they are brought anywhere near the nobility but i stress, i must speak to them with all of the fugitives present. It is of the greatest importance

The group watch the main gates slowly rise as Vorde speaks, hearing the grunting of guards nearby as they work it open. They’re all ushered ahead by the guardsmen behind them to walk through the gates. Stepping over the threshold they feel a wash of something pass over them as they enter the perimeter of the palace before moving along. 

Ghester: In the back of your head Psalm you hear Ghester make almost what sounds like a grunt of pain before hearing him whisper “....nasty enchantments in place now i see” Psalm: psalm's just looks at orin like eh could be worse, oh wait

Psalm: psalm just tries to mask cough asking ghester "are you alright?" in infernal Ghester: you hear a strained hmm as he speaks "nothing that will kill me but it shall be a persistent pain for a while i suppose, im being forcefully restrained is how i would put it. dont worry, i'll do my best to keep a watchful eye" Psalm: quietly "hmm, i wasn't that concerned about them taking my stuff but knowing that i guess i should be. although i can't really say i'm surprised they'd have you covered too." Ghester: he gives a dreary sigh Psalm: what do you want me to kiss it better? tough it out man! you're like a million years old aren't you? Ghester: he doesn't respond Psalm: * slightly concerned *

Keva: keva's gone from staring warily at the guards to staring at psalm talking to himself Han: 🤨 Psalm: psalm like why y'all staring at me Han: cant a man talk to himself every once in a while Psalm: thats what im saying

As the group walk through they all hear the guard captain Vorde is speaking to respond with a “we’ll see” before she pulls another guard over and motions for them to run ahead of the group with a message.

They quickly take off, the guard captain then turns and motions for Vorde and the entourage to follow close behind. The group are all ushered through a grand main garden, blooming flowers of yellow and blue and large plants bracket the main pathway. They feel plenty of eyes on then as they’re lead through the grounds.

> 🎵  Dark Medieval Blues. Hurdy-Gurdy, Organ & Drum / Andrey Vinogradov

The group is pushed towards the main palace entrance doors and a grand entrance foyer, flanked by royal guardsmen as they enter. There are a number more than there were during the Ball they notice as they’re are ushered down a tall corridor to the right, the royal guardsman marching along with them the whole way.

Eventually in one of the corridors they are brought to a stop. Soon after the messenger that was sent ahead earlier rushes back, as he heaves out of breath the guard captain mutters an impatient “and…?” he stands puffing before sidling up to whisper in her ear, she makes a sour face afterwards.

Guard Captain: “You’re to be examined before i bring you before the court” she points at a nearby door “inside” 

The group are once again hauled through by the guards. They find themselves led through a door to what appears to be an old and ornate looking library, though somewhat messy looking, before being ordered to sit upon a set of chairs lined up near a long wooden table.

The ceiling here is high and there are various potted plants strewn about the tall cases of old tomes, ladders with wheels on the bottom are affixed to the large wooden bookshelves. Orin seems to be looking about the large room with curiosity as if he cant help himself.

Psalm: psalm is same he's basically like "oh shit! books!!" Han: han keeps glaring at the guard who took all her shit n gritting her teeth Finn: finn also letting his eyes wander a little around the room Keva: keva also looks around and takes it all in warily

After a few minutes of waiting you all see the door open again as a woman wearing a large hat with aqua toned skin steps through, fins sprouting from her face.

Han: han briefly looks at her, then does a double take.  Rokka: anxiety sky rockets

Han: han wolf whistles smh she’s a chad dont be stupid Psalm: PLEASE NO Han: NO NO AS;LKHFDLKHWADS;LKF IM KIDDING IM KIDDING Cimmorro: KVLDJSKGJSDKLG\ Han: u can keep me in these cuffs baby girl (winks) Psalm: psalm throws up Plum: [retches] Han: this is why han only gets laid when she pays Psalm: OH MY LORD WHAT A THING TO SAY LMFAO Chip: she fucks but at what cost (25 gold) Han: 25 GOLD, DAMN

The woman appears as if she's a triton, the race typically live underwater they suppose shorewater is located on the sea, not strange for the people to make their way into the politics of the country on the oceans doorstep.

Carrying papers with her they note that she appears to be formally dressed, though they aren't quite sure of her station. She moves towards the table with a nod and places the notes and items she seems to be carrying down with a quick huff and turning to the guardsman

Mardella: “I’m here to examine the accused, i shall cast a general spell then probe further if i need too” as she speaks she brushes an errant hair behind one of her fins. Han: raise ur hand if u dont wanna get zone of truth-ed Plum: I DO I DO I WANNA GET ZONE OF TRUTHED MAKE THIS NIGHTMARE END I'M INNOCENT Han: AKLDSF;LKHRAWLKHHESGDLKAW;LKJ4F all my charm spell nightmares coming to life

Mardella: turning to the three not seated she continues “I am guessing you are Vorde Barotte then?” Vorde: he gives a small bow in response “yes that is correct” Mardella: she hmms and continues “I am curious as to how you apprehended them all when the guardsman had such difficulty, but you seem to express a great desire to speak before the kings themselves so i will leave the needling for the moment” she turns back to the rest of you seated in the chairs “right then this shall take me some time”

She moves to sit at the long table and picks up the papers she was holding. Just then the group also notice she also has a quill and a pot of ink near her. She quickly gets to work drawing notes of some sort before standing.

She walks back to the 6 of them and speaks casting a spell, she seems to grip something at her neck glowing a white light for a moment before relenting. She casts the Zone of Truth of spell, affecting all of them except for Psalm and Cimmorro. Should they speak now they can only respond truthfully.

Psalm: i almost wished cimm failed that just to force him to speak properly Plum: cimm says peenus weenus fr and this woman is like, i am in the presence of a complicated mind... a puzzle box Cimmorro: JKGSDGJSG now everyone's in MY world Chip: lets start with your childhood cimmorro Cimmorro: AM I AT THERAPY? Han: YES

Mardella: she clasps her hands in front of herself and speaks "i shall ask you a series of questions, i expect you to cooperate with this process" she pauses and continues "are any you of currently under the effects of a spell, intended to deceive?" Keva: no Plum: nah Psalm: as far as i am aware, no Han: no Rokka: nope Cimmorro: nope

Han: laughs over the differences n similarities in our responses Psalm: that’s rp babey! Plum: tag urself

Mardella: she hmms and continues "are any of you still carrying weapons or contraband on your person" Han: han grits her teeth "i fucking wish" Keva: no Psalm: no Cimmorro: nope Rokka: nope :( Plum: no Cimmorro: plum sitting there thinking "is this illegal? fuck if i know" (re their pink medical potion) for 30 seconds before answering

Mardella: she continues "do you harbour ill intent towards the royalty of this country" Plum: no Keva: no Han: no Rokka: never Psalm: no Cimmorro: not yet i dont :d Plum: LFAMOGOGOO Han:;KHAS;LKDF;AWEFD Cimmorro: DONT TEST ME Chip: cimmorro cringe compilation Psalm: @ cim

Cimmorro: LKBF;DBCVB,SB.,S Han: we are all testing her patience,  cimm and han 🤝 at their wits fucking end Cimmorro: they find truce. Once

Mardella: she gives you a look cimm and continues "how long ago did you arrive and shorewater, and for what purpose" Keva: 2 weeks. i’m looking for someone Plum: a few weeks ago, came here to talk to vorde Rokka: nearly a month, im just exploring Psalm: a little under two weeks. and i'm just here for a change of scenery Cimmorro: came around 2 weeks back or so. just passing by really, pilgrimaging Han: almost 5 seasons. my friend left me here to find myself

Mardella: she humms "and a final one, were you all here on the night of the Elfonsent Ball?" Han: yes Keva: yes Cimmorro: yup Psalm: yes Plum: ya Rokka: yup

Mardella: satisfied she nods and unclasps her hands "thank you for complying" 

The woman walks back to the end of the table where she placed her papers and begins to draw with the ink and quill, what look like runes of a sort, whispering under her breath, they figure shes slowly casting another spell.

They sit in silence under the watch of the guardsman, about ten minutes pass before she seems to finish, a quick glow bursts from her hands and she stands once again, coming to scrutinise them all. She then slowly examines them all one by one from a distance, making her way down the line before stopping after a time, seemingly satisfied.

Mardella: “I’ve not detected anything suspicious in the way of magic for now” she stands and dusts her dress slightly “i shall go and inform the kings, lead them to the court hall once you are ready” she turns and gives Vorde a slight bow before standing and leaving the room. 

Han: oh that was a detect magic not identify, i was like how is psalm not pinging -  warlock pact Cimmorro: psalm big dong pinging under the radar of mommy Psalm: yeah everything about that is horrible jez Chip: psalm back on pornhub Psalm: everything about what you just said is terrible, GOD, THIS IS LIKE THE THIRD TIME Plum: jez, jez i will beat you one day Cimmorro: Nicj9jjoflkeneje

The guard captain satisfied, motions for the guards to haul the group out of the room and back through the palace, the other three following close behind. Once more they are led through the tall corridors of the palace into a more minimalistically decorated area, though it seems everywhere in this place is covered in plush long carpets. Eventually they are all brought before a large set of double doors, taller than themselves, and brought to a stop. 

The guard captain stands at attention before them all, bringing Vorde, Finn and Orin in front of the group, before turning and lightly knocking on the door. A moment passes and soon after what they assume to be a secretary of sorts sticks his head out and whispers in her ear before leaning back inside and closing the door.

Plum: [fidgeting] Rokka: [fidgeting] Han: han is stoic tense n grimacing the usual Keva: keva's like, lightly scuffing the plush carpet with a shoe as she looks around Psalm: psalm sneezes Chip: ghester doesn't say bless you

Guard Captain: she turns back to you all and speaks “You have been granted an audience with the kings, the princess, the archmage and the high arcane adviser. You will speak when spoken too and keep your hands to yourself, if i notice but a hair out of place, you're out the door. As for the rest of you-” she cranes her head “try anything again and we’ll gut you where you stand, am i clear?” Plum: i heard one of the kings is really hot, IM JK Han: KKHDA;SLKHFALKHEFDS Cimmorro: JDJFKROEDLDM so ure saying hes not? 🤔

> 🎵  The Great Cross-Examination ~ Allegro 2015 / The Great Ace Attorney OST

The guard captain turns and pushes open the doors walking ahead. Vorde, Orin and Finn follow after her as the rest of the group are pushed along behind by the royal guardsman. They all enter what looks like a large chamber, a small set of stairs leading down into a large circle with an ornate design in its centre, tall pillars along either end. At the centre hanging over the centre of the large circle is a lit chandelier, clean in its design.

Across and up another set of stairs appears to be 5 seats, two more ornately decorated than the others, each sat upon by a person flanked by stone statues. The two kings Jermiah and Peruvus Argotts, sit in the two at the centre, flanked by princess Forrin Argott. Next to them sits a gnome in ornate garb, and the woman from earlier, Mardella. 

The chamber has a set of royal guardsmen lined up on either end of the wall at attention, the group is slowly led down to the centre of the room as the guard captain in front of them speaks, head bowed low.

Psalm: A GNOME? :pogchamp: WE'VE BEEN KONGED Plum: GNOME COOL Cimmorro: DAMN TGIF THANK GNOME ITS FRIDAY Han: 

Rokka: SDFCGVHBJKL Cimmorro: THANKS POKI

Guard Captain: your majesty's, i bring Vorde Barvotte of Antessa and his associates, as well as the 6 fugitives wanted for the events that occurred during the Efonsent Ball” she then steps back and aside, allowing Vorde, Finn and Orin to stand facing the court instead. “He claims to have pertinent information regarding their plans and a future plan of attack upon the city, he desired to relay this directly to the court.” The eyes of the five soon land on Vorde as he folds his arms behind his back.

Jeremiah: the king consort speaks up first “Well no need to keep us in suspense sire, speak freely. Mind we are a bit on edge at the moment so if possible it would be well for us to keep this audience brief” Turen: you hear the gnome woman speak up soon after him with a sigh “better for us to be taking no audiences at this time with the work to be done right now” Forrin: The princess responds soon after “we can't turn down any information at this time Turen, even if it ends up being a farce. Though I doubt the good sir would jeopardise himself so readily in such a precarious time, correct?” she tilts her head slightly with a glance at Vorde. Vorde: He responds with a small bow and a brief “of course your highness” Jermiah: he once again waves his hand as if prompting Vorde to begin speaking once more. Cimmorro: speak now thot Plum: plum is just listening to them say words and not absorbing any of it,  just thinking i am looking at the faces of the rulers of this country right now, i wonder what my parents would think Finn: finn looking at these people like man theyre richer than us Cimmorro: we start dancing behind him, interactive presentation Han: we start doing fortnite dances Psalm: psalm is also like hmm wonder what my parents would think, how did i end up here

Vorde: standing straight again he begins “I bring important news of dire events but more notably i must stress an important detail first. The 6 fugitives behind me stand accused of heinous crimes towards the court and the sanctity of this city and country, but I've proof they were merely innocent bystanders who were used. Their faces stolen to be equipped as masks in crimes against this country” He straightens his back slightly before continuing “On my person i have a pieces of evidence that point towards the true culprits behind the attack on your persons your majesty’s, a cult known by the moniker ‘The Red Letterheads’ who deal in disgusting acts for a purpose i do not fully understand myself yet” 

 As Vorde speaks the group see the 5 sitting in front of him watch with rapt attention, he details the evidence they’ve all found and presents his satchel, leaving it upon the ground for examination as he speaks. The guard captain takes the satchel and walks it to the gnome Turen and Mardella who begin to examine its contents. 

> 🎵  Joint Reasoning (Type A) / The Great Ace Attorney OST

Throughout his monologue he turns to each member of the party to provide testimony or speak upon the things they have seen and encountered over the past few days to prove their innocence, and the letterheads being the true culprits before leaving the closing argument to Finn.

Han: uses her outlander feat to provide testimony explaining the groups movements precisely retracing their steps and describing the letterheads place

Psalm: persuades them that the night started with the group being either hired as vinny's bodyguards or brought along as his +1's and the reason why they chose them for doppelgangers was because they were apparently easy targets

Plum: talks about the fact that they only came to shorewater to talk to vorde and then was going to fuck off back to talornia or wherever - they say "fuck off back to" and then are like ah oops

Keva: say she was talking with silversoul and was in his vicinity during the attack, so she saw him stabbed and wasn't around vinny who her doppelganger was seen stabbing bc she was across the ballroom -  [ psalm jumps in on keva's point to say that he had seen the letterhead member that stabbed vinny before she disguised herself as keva and that they later apprehended her and got information out of her ]

Rokka: mentions that he was speaking to vorde with han and plum at the ball,  BRO IM JUST A JOCK

Cimmorro: speaks precisely about the methods of necromancy the group saw, including the undead zombies and the blood clones.

Finn: for the closing statement he emphasises keva’s testimony re:gintama and cimmorro’s regarding the blood clones. Tying that in with the evidence the group  have and making it clear that the real perpetrators have pressing motives that need to be investigated with utmost urgency

> 🎵  The Old Bailey ~ Closing Argument / The Great Ace Attorney OST

Finn eventually closes out the argument, nervously taking a breath as he finishes speaking. In front of them the group watch as the court thinks of the things the party has relayed, most of them with their brows furrowed. 

Psalm: i hope this turns into a "glad we brought him!" situation Cimmorro: PLZ 🥺

Peruvus: finally he speaks up “So this is true then? I had suspicions this was part of a greater plot but it appears to have become all the truer with every word you’ve spoken.”  Jeremiah: “The inconsistencies within your testimony make sense if the culprits were in fact doppelgangers, a cult hmm” looking at you Finn he continues "you said his name was Theyord?” Han: han zones out for a sec and then goes "i believe he also went by ansam?" Finn: finn pulls down his scarf slightly. "Indeed. But my uncle has a better account of this, if you do not mind him relaying it in my place." and just. eyeballs vorde. motioning for him to take over. Cimmorro: this is finn the whole time but crying

Vorde: Yes, your majesty, i think in a previous life he may have gone by the name Ansam, i'm unsure of its relevance at the moment Jeremiah: at that he seems to think for a moment before frowning and putting a hand to his face to think, not speaking after. Turen: next to him the archmage speaks up “This tome is certifiably filled with black magic, the kind you often dont see used on the material plane by living creatures because of how complicated the runes are. If this cult's patron is Mephisto then that is most certainly where they got these litany of spells, he just gives them out to anyone who asks now? This devil gives me a headache…” she turns towards the three standing members of royalty before continuing “i can confirm the contents of this tome are indeed teemed toward necromancy and mind control, it may explain a few things. The enchantments on these items feel like the scratchings of the desperate” she looks over at you cimmorro "seems he knows what hes talking about" Cimmorro: cimm just looks back at them like <:3c

Keva and Han attempt to study the king consort’s reaction to the name Ansam but dont get much aside from the fact that he recognises it, theyre unsure how affected he is right now by its mention. Han does note that the 5 seem to be seriously considering the groups argument, seems Finn’s closing argument was quite strong. 

Psalm also thinks now and considers if he’s heard the name Ansam before, he thinks that perhaps faintly he may have heard it somewhere back home, thinking that it sounds like it could be the name of tiefling. Though he doesnt get much else. Soon after Cimmorro is praised Mardella once again speaks up 

Mardella: “i do not think they're lying about the stolen faces, we had the suspicion already. Once we removed the ring upon the corpse in the palace it changed its face completely, it's of the same make as the one I hold now” she twirls the disguise ring around in the light. “Your majesty’s, your highness, i too can confirm the authenticity of these items as Turen just did” Forrin: at this she responds, lifting her arm slightly, beckoning towards the guard captain “as a gesture of trust, i’d like you to remove their bindings as they stand before us captain” 

Quickly bowing, the guard captain walks over to the group of six, Orin, Finn and Vorde drop the ropes as she quickly cuts each member free one by one, their hands allowed to roam as they please. Other royal guards step forward to take the ropes and remove them from the hall as the king begins to speak once more.

Peruvus: “I'm going to choose to believe the events you’ve just relayed to us to be truth, in which case I apologise for the rough treatment you’ve no doubt undergone in place of our true culprits. It must not have been easy gathering all of this information.” He turns to you Finnian, and continues “earlier your group said there was an immediate dire threat facing us, can you explain? Or was this also part of the farce to gain an audience with us” he clasps his hands over his knees as he speaks, leaning forward slightly “we’ve upped the city’s defences somewhat since the assassination attempts and the return of our archmage, but there have been unusual happenings i've noticed over the past day. I’d like to know what you can tell me and if you’ve any further leads”  Psalm: If I may, what are these 'unusual happenings' you're referring to? Peruvus: he shits his attention over towards you psalm and responds "The mayor caused a great hullabaloo at the government ward gates, it appears as if he started a fist fight with all the nearby guardsmen out of the blue. None were eager to bring him down as he was already still injured from the Ball’s events" he rubs the bridge of his nose as if beleaguered "Similarly a cleric from the church of Heiron was seen pounding on the gates in the church district soon after his recovery within his own church's walls, he resisted any attempts from the guardsman to calm him and had to be restrained..." Keva: keva frowns @ news abt panaver Han: han tsks kind of to herself

Psalm: I see. Well going off what we know so far the cult has the ability to both disguise themselves, but their leader can temporarily possess the followers as well. The cleric is one of the wounded from the night of the ball, so that at least explains his breakdown. Keva: "silversoul" keva says, quieter than she usually speaks Psalm: sorry what was that Keva: keva huffs and says louder "his name was panaver silversoul. he was the one i was talking to." Han: we think who was stabbed, is who can be controlled by theyord Finn: "It was not a farce. Our investigation has proven that the Letterheads have been preparing to perform a ritual. Perhaps some sort of summoning. The language they used suggested serious danger. Tightened defenses or not, Shorewater is vulnerable." Finn sighs and closes his eyes for a second. "it might be of interest for you to know that they possess portals that lead to various different places in Shorewater, possibly outside of it." Psalm: With that being said, we don't really have the specifics of the 'dire' event the letterheads have planned. But for the most part they seem intent on 'punishing' Shorewater. Oh, and they plan to carry out this punishment within the next few days. Plum: i'd give us less than two days. Psalm: If even so much. We did however, infiltrate their base, so assuming they haven't left we know the whereabouts and have an idea of what it's like inside

Cimmorro:  is finn still wearing all of his layers during the entirety of this Finn: yes Cimmorro: perfect,  he's just waddling around while explaining things

Forrin: ...a large scale attack… we’ll need Turen to scour that tome for any sort of spell that might indicate to what exactly they’re attempting, perhaps that Accord wizard might assist us. We must further up the guard presence along the walls and call a lockdown perhaps.. Jeremiah: perhaps we ought evacuate the city entirely, though I wonder if we’d have enough time, if we were caught while people are outside their homes en masse it could worsen the situation entirely… Mardella: i think a lockdown would be a better course of action, if we set about activating the city wide enchantments quickly the people would be safer inside their homes than out Jeremiah: he nods in response “hmm this is true, we’ll need to expend all our effort into organising the guard as quickly as possible more than we already have, we ought to bulk up the church and government ward gates specifically as well. Its good to know we've a location to crack down on then as well. We ought to arrange a group of guardsman and mages to flush them out post hate as well..

> 🎵  Joint Reasoning: The Great Deduction (Type B) / The Great Ace Attorney OST

Forrin calls over the guard captain and the secretary seated at the desk close by and begins relaying orders for them to begin sending out along with Peruvus. Jeremiah however continues to address the group as they do.

Jeremiah: Travellers and esteemed Barvottes. I King Consort Jeremiah, am now asking formally for your aid in this time of crisis, we are stretched thin and with not knowing what to expect the city needs as much help and eyes as we can give her. You will be compensated greatly for helping the city of Shorewater, and the country of Dorrin itself in its coming time of crisis. As well as for the hardships you have already endured, is there a name I might refer to you all as going forward?” Vorde: he turns his head at you all expectantly afterwards as well.

Cimmorro: wow even on dnd we quarantine Chip: social distancing to save from cults Psalm: damn jeremiah if you're asking like that... 👉👈 Cimmorro: jeremiah stan club Plum: sir can i get your autograph

The group then scramble to decide on a name, quickly forming a group huddle amongst themselves.

Cimmorro: cimm does a poor attempt to huddle us all up and goes "lets just go with peenus weenus" Plum: whispering heatedly "shut up cimm shut up" Psalm: sure why not, i'm sure whatever dignity we have left doesn't matter anymore right? Han: tries not to choke

Finn: finn coughs uncomfortably at cimm's suggestion. "we could simply refer to ourselves as a strike force." Han: do we even have anything that makes us one Psalm: vinny's strike force... to honour him since he's dead. /s Cimmorro: the brokebacks Plum: SHUTGUUPPGPF

Cimmorro: while everyone is debating i just walk up to the king and goes like we're the vengaboys -  "your majesty i present to you the vengaboys" Jeremiah: he looks towards you cimmorro and tilts his head "vengaboys? i see, well then Vengaboys-" and he turns to the rest of you all "i would like to ask again for finality's sake, do you have any more possible leads at the moment?" Cimmorro: i turn back to everyone and gives a thumbs up Psalm: psalm gives a thumbs up back Vorde: [internally] tf does venga mean Psalm: TF DOES VENGA MEAN Chip: vengeance boys... Cimmorro: ^ Keva: boys for vengeance Finn: 

Psalm responds afterwards, informing the king consort that the only one they have would be the hideout as they’ve never met Theyord in person, Han emphasising only when hes possessed someone. He also brings up the notes in the back of the book, noting Shelly’s name and that she may be in possible danger.

Keva: i step a little closer to psalm and say "tell them about those people we ran into down there" Psalm: psalm just folds his arms and does what keva asks Keva: YYYEEAAAAHHH

Han: when theres a pause han also asks "what about the assassin that you caught? who are they?" Jeremiah: he looks over at you "they weren't caught per say, the guards struck them right in the ballroom before they could strike at us, dead in seconds." he thinks "we examined the body of course but as far as we could tell they weren't a Shorewater native, i dont think they were from Dorrin originally either. The most we could glean was they had a brand upon their back in the shape of a symbol once we removed the disguise”

Forrin then returns her attention to the conversation at hand, seemingly her and her brother Peruvus have finished issuing orders for the moment, having been paying attention to the ongoing conversation.

Peruvus: “We shall work on the assignment of the guardsmen across the city and deciphering all we can from the tome you’ve given us, as well as bolster the city's magic defences, and declare a lockdown. Once you return from investigating Shelly Carter’s abode I would ask you to assist us directly in these tasks. At the most i can spare some guardsmen to assist you in this endeavour, it would be best i think to send one of the captains in charge of the arcana district to help your investigation. I will send word for you to meet them at the district gates, it would be best for us to move as quickly as possible”  Turen: in response to this archmage stands “if i am no longer needed your majesty i shall consort with Mardella and the witch from the accord, my workload has suddenly increased tenfold” she rolls her shoulders as if gearing up for a fist fight.

Jeremiah nods and waves her and Mardella off, the two stand and leave the room via one of the large doors, finally him and the other two royals stand 

Jeremiah: “The royal guardsman shall escort you off the palace grounds and send word across the city that you aren't to be approached in your travel, should you require any food or rest before you head off you may use one of the rooms in the palace. The guardsmen will direct you.” Peruvus: “return as soon as you are able, we’ve not a moment to waste” Psalm: I don't speak for everyone here, but as it's still early in the day I don't think we'll be here for long before heading onto our next task Peruvus: looks towards you psalm and nods "of course, whatever suits you for the moment" He looks back towards Vorde addressing him directly "thank you again for your aid in this time from your family, sire Barvotte, it shall not be forgotten. As well as for you, Vengaboys, may we meet to discuss what comes next soon with higher hopes" 

The royal guard captain stands and rises as the royals give the group a small courteous bow which Vorde returns doubly so. The party and co. are ushered back out of the doors of the grand courthall their names now clear, their next task pressing on their minds....

--

Notes

🦇Finn succeeded the debate skill challenge very epic

🍺 Plum drank the「  Red Potion ✨ 」who knows how long they’ll have red hair for...

-「  4 Poison Daggers ✨ 」-「 a Branding Rod ✨ 」-「 a Red Tome ✨ and -「 2 Letterhead Tokens ✨ 」 were handed over to the Court as evidence

- ITS NOON - 33 HOURS UNTIL - 📜🩸 The Reckoning 🩸📜 - (supposedly)

[threesideddream]

“Lorena” ep. 4 thoughts

so they... put her in a state hospital that was basically a jail

LMAO her press manager said Barbara Walters couldnt have an interview cuz she’s Illuminati skjasdakajhdkjasda

there was entirely too much focus on her cutting off his dick and not enough on her abuse and it was apparently very purposeful with lots of women journalists trying to keep that angle and being told “nobody cares” wow wow wow

and then John went on a fucking press tour and became a porn star smh declared bankruptcy to keep from paying literally anyone but ended up getting taken advantage of anyway

and then did 2 months for hitting his next girlfriend smfh

this man really stupid. like this is a dull-minded man. almost forgot he tried to get  penis enlargement surgery and ruined his whole dick

“I never had anyone to protect me” lmfao boy if you don’t...!

she said “no matter how public my face is I need to go back to my routine” and if that isn’t like a true Traumatized Woman of Color moodt

again, really loving this emphasis on domestic violence as a national issue that’s often sidelined

this has little to do with anything but omfg, Airforce Amy still works at the Moonlite Bunny Ranch?!

they tried to make him a bartender and he was bad at it and they tried to make him a limo driver and he let some drunk 18 year old girl drive for him

“from nice guy to fucking asshole in three drinks” lmfao he got fired ad HIS FAMILY THREATENED THE BUNNY RANCH MADAM, GOODBYE

and then he stole $150k of clothes and then returning them for cash what the hell lmfao got bailed out by one of th guys who runs the Ranch and then skipped his bail party, HE WAS ONLY 32 LMFAO

lmfao yo her boss who GOT HER THE LAWYER AND MEDIA MANAGER started trying to take advantage and taking 15% smh this is why you can’t trust trust white women!!! glad she got rid of her though

this garbage ass grown ass man had a 19 year old he was sleeping with from the Bunny Ranch paying his rent after he had her DRIVE him to niagara falls from nevada. and then beat her, r*ped her, and threatened to kill her. this muhfucka said at the beginning that the misconception is that he’s a violent guy. bruh, you proved it!

if Lorena was using him and he was never an abuser, how is she flying under the radar and he’s getting slammed with charges for years back to back to back?

now he’s blaming trauma on the Black people he was raised around, goodbye  like you almost me with talking about your family issues and the physical and sexual abuse that happened until you started the “Boohoo we were the only whites in our Black neighborhood and they hated us”

I’m so glad she found a loving relationship and a way to heal by helping others

“I know there’s going to jokes, but as long as I can shine light on abuse, then it’s all worth it” bless her

wow John has sent her a TON of letters and cards saying he loves her and dreams about her and thinks about her, sending her messages to her job and over facebook, he really has never left her alone AND THEN HE SAID SHE REACHED OUT FIRST TO ASK ABOUT MONEY. 

“me and lorena getting back together, that would be the ultimate love, the ultimate forgiveness” wow go choke lmfao she said “i cut your penis off, just leave me alone”

this was a wild ride for someone who only knew she cut his penis off

[xphanuel]

I hate cops

That post reminded me of all the times I was searched for no good reason and had my rights thrown in the garbage, lol. I dead ass was only found with weed once, and they let me fucking keep it after trying to see if I knew where they could find coke, to which I genuinely laughed bc I'm afraid of cocaine and I've never tried it LMFAO

Last time I got pulled over, it was this past January and I was driving home from work, which could range from 1 am to 3 am if I work the evening/night shift. I wasnt even speeding, but the cops like to park in dark parking lots and pull out after you for some reason by me? Not sure if that's everywhere or not. I saw the dude pull out after me, and I was like here we fuckin go lmao I'm going to jail or dying for hitting and screaming at a cop. I make the right I'm supposed to make to get to my house, and I make the next left, which is when he pulled me over. So he comes up to my car and I give him my license and registration and ask why he pulled me over and he said that my turn was wide??? "yeah, you sure about that buddy? You sure it was the turn? Not that you saw me on Hempstead turnpike, parked in that dark abandoned parking lot next to the motel, and pulled out after me to make a random stop for no good reason at 2 in the morning on my way home from work, during a pandemic?" He told me to sit tight and then he immediately brought all my shit back, as if he realized theres fucking cameras in the parking lot he was sitting in, or that I wasnt fucking stupid.

Bro, fr, the only cop that's been a god send to me was the one state trooper who ticketed me for speeding but brought down how fast I was actually going. My ass was going 110, I would have went to jail in Pennsylvania with my friend in the car jfc.

The dude was super nice though and appreciated that I pulled over on the "wrong" side bc the parkway was small and didnt have a lot of room to pull over on the "right" side, so I just wanted to make sure the dude wouldnt get smashed by a trailer or some shit. He brought the speed down to 75 and just gave me a ticket and sent me on my way. And ngl I deserved the ticket, I shouldnt have been speeding like that, especially in a fucking rental. That day I was just so pissed off and already had to call the cops bc we were leaving a convention and the valet literally outright refused to give us our car back because "we were rude" when all I did was say hi and gave my name for the valet??? Like lmfao, the cops ripped him a fucking new asshole when they showed up, especially when he tried to double down and say he was "just trying to teach us a lesson not to be rude" and the cop just snapped and was like "that's not part of your job, you're not one of their parents, and it's illegal to hold their own car because you wouldnt listen to them and interpreted their tone as rude." Bc dead ass all I said was "uhhh, hi, Elliot _________?" Which is how I requested my car the entire time we were at this fucking convention??? Like bruh what is the world even

[fatal-blow]

Hhh god I was scrolling through the list of the defenders' names for the character profile thing, like "ooh yes I wanna know more about him, and him, and her, and- " and then realized I'd chosen approximately All of them to ask about. Oops. So let's just go with Arin Ying and Lizz (unless you wanna talk about all of them of course 😉)

BOY don’t tempt me lol (maybe if no one else sends me any i’ll do the rest for fun :P)

Sorry about any typos i’m too lazy to read it over for mistakes lol

Full Name:  Arin Savano (formerly Codey)Gender and Sexuality: Woman and GayPronouns: She/herEthnicity/Species: Native American from both Jean and her...other...mother lol.  And she’s human...mostly.Birthplace and Birthdate:  Born in Switzerland in a lab on January 2ndGuilty Pleasures:  Baths.  Really long, really hot baths.  She’s honestly never had a really nice bath before until she can to the manor and now when she gets the house (mostly) to herself she steals the bathroom and relaxes for like hours on end.Phobias:  Mmm, she’s a bit claustrophobic.What They Would Be Famous For:  Local Woman Caught in a Huge Highway Pileup, Comes Out Completely UnscathedWhat They Would Get Arrested For:  Listen, you wouldn’t be able to catch her.  That said, she should honestly be in jail for a few things, including murder and robbery.OC You Ship Them With:  No one right now to be honest?  I actually kinda ship her with Ying but I also almost ship her with Lucifer so we’ll see where fate takes us.OC Most Likely To Murder Them:  Byron lmfaoFavorite Movie/Book Genre:  Not a fan of reading or movies, but she thought the Star Wars movies were cool when Skylar and Jimmy showed them to her.Least Favorite Movie/Book Cliche:  Straight White ManTalents and/or Powers: She’s lucky!  Although she’s still inexperienced, Arin can channel her abilities to achieve, essentially, a “critical hit.”  She’s very fortunate overall, though.  She can also tell when people are lying and can escape from anywhere.Why Someone Might Love Them:  She provides a strong shoulders to lean on when times are tough.  She’s very trustworthy and she’ll never betray you once you’ve bonded with her.Why Someone Might Hate Them: She’s nosey and takes it upon herself to micromanage her team.  She often overthinks things and has a habit of hesitating.How They Change:  After Arin’s initial over inflated confidence is broken down, she learns to build herself up from the basics, re-learning herself and what she’s capable of, especially power wise.Why You Love Them: She’s kind, but not naive.  She takes care of the little guys.  Also her conflict is a very real thing and I think it will make her a very strong leader in the future.

Full Name: Ying ChengGender and Sexuality: Woman and ??? (has been in a relationship with another woman, though)Pronouns: She/herEthnicity/Species: Japanese on both sides, human (again, for the most part). Birthplace and Birthdate:  Switzerland, a la laboratory, October 7Guilty Pleasures: I’m not sure Ying has “guilty” pleasures because I don’t think she feels guilty about them.  She’s doing her best to stay happy, even though she’s aware that her time is so short, and she refuses to feel guilty about that.Phobias: Not like a phobia but she’s afraid of dying before she makes sure that everyone she’s close to dies a good death after a good life.What They Would Be Famous For:  Seeing ghosts, probably.What They Would Get Arrested For:  Honestly probably shit like assaulting workers that are cutting down forests, etc (has probably actually done this while she was living in Lao)OC You Ship Them With:  Lizz, but also a bit of Arin.OC Most Likely To Murder Them:  Blaine, maybe?Favorite Movie/Book Genre:  Loves movies with happy endings, doesn’t mind horror, loves poetry and YA fiction Least Favorite Movie/Book Cliche:  Forced Hetero RomanceTalents and/or Powers:  Can see ghosts!  Can do magic!  Can draw!  Can write!  Ying is not lacking as far as talents go.Why Someone Might Love Them:  She loves deeply and does the best she can for the people she loves.Why Someone Might Hate Them:  Grossly stubborn, has an issue with being wrong.How They Change:  Without giving away too much, Ying becomes colder and more cynical as she grows, pushing people away out of fear of hurting them when the inevitable comes.  Why You Love Them: She’s a complicated person with some pretty glaring flaws.  She has a lot to work out and I like being the one to facilitate that.

Full Name:  Elizabeth “Lizz” Newhouse (formerly Wold)Gender and Sexuality: Woman and BisexualPronouns: She/herEthnicity/Species: English, English, and English.  She’s an English girl, who is mostly human.Birthplace and Birthdate:  Blah, blah, Switzerland, blah, blah lab, blah blah her birthday is February 16Guilty Pleasures:  Fuck guilt, she loves feeling good and she’ll never feel bad about that.  She takes great joy in testing boundaries, both ones set by the Alphas and actual...laws...  Also loves pranking people and pushing people’s buttons.Phobias:  idk guys this one’s pretty damn near fearless?  Afraid of hurting others, probablyWhat They Would Be Famous For:  Being an extremely cunning and skilled entrepreneurWhat They Would Get Arrested For:  What wouldn’t she get arrested for is probably the better question.OC You Ship Them With:  Tado the most, but Ying to a (much) lesser extent.OC Most Likely To Murder Them:  Blaine.  Fergus, out of sheer god damn frustration.  Byron as their relationship takes a major dive.  Katherine because their personalities do not mix (aka a lot of freaking people)Favorite Movie/Book Genre:  Probably good action-y moviesLeast Favorite Movie/Book Cliche:  Get your useless romance out of my action i wanna see people kill each other not kissTalents and/or Powers:  She can manipulate and turn into electricity!  She’s also capable of annoying damn near anyone she comes into contact with!Why Someone Might Love Them:  She’s fun and exciting, a real blast at a party.Why Someone Might Hate Them:  She can be downright obnoxious and totally rude at times.How They Change:  Lizz learns to rein in the worst of her impulses and mature a little bit throughout the story.Why You Love Them:She’s really fun to write about!  Every line and action bursts with unrestrained excitement!  Also, there’s something fun about writing characters that are downright nasty to other people sometimes.

[harryseyebrows]

why are you bothering trying to sound so vague and general when you're deadass just referring to trans people lmfao. like where was this outrage when all your mutuals were frothing at the mouth over hiko and haige and hamille and medicine. actually where was that walltext earlier today when people implied harry was fucking kiko? oh right! nowhere. because you're just a transphobe(who also said harry's muscles made him manly/masculine phew!). god i wonder why you always get hate ;/

‘all your mutuals’ listen idk who you think i follow but youre mistaken. i wasnt even fucking online earlier!!!! i was out!! doing things!! which you should consider doing because clearly sitting in front of a screen isnt doing you any fucking favors you absolute ASSHOLE. just admit that YOU personally want harry to be 100% gay and move on. once you do that you’ll feel better, i promise. and trying to police who i find attractive? thats fun. i did not know that pointing out physical features on another human was a crime. send me to lesbian jail please for my sins of feeling safe enough to explore attraction to a man. god help my soul!!!