#[ rain_candy ♥︎ - Ame ]

[slasheddreams]

Internet Overdose [ bag of marshmallows / broken glass / blood rain ]

please proceed with caution !! ⚠️ If you’re sensitive to any of the below, please read with care !! Don't force yourself to read, and if you choose to read it, please take care of yourselves 💕 and if you decide to read this, and get upset, you have no one to blame but yourself. You've been warned.

content warning for: [ inspired by Needy Streamer Overload and the Internet Overdose Ending ] [ brief mentions of doxxing, mentions of paparazzi/stalking, mentions of harassment, mentions of puking, descriptions of being watched, mentions of medication and overdose, implications of self-harm and harm/murder, etc. ]

Please take only the recommended internet dosage~ ♥︎

“Ame. Ame! Ame, are you even listening to me?”

Placing his hands on his waist, the off white haired boy shook his head in disappointment. Looking up slightly, the purple haired girl sighed.

“I’m busy. Trying to get the confirmation for YOUR trip to the music studio, actually. Can I help you?”

“… You can start by paying more attention to me~ I’m a needy streamer, Ame~ I’m YOUR needy streamer, even <3”

Winking, the boy giggled as Ame rolled her eye in annoyance. Clasping her hands on the desk, she waited silently. After a moment, the boy laughed sheepishly.

“… I’ve been feeling a little sluggish as of late. My name’s been popping up a little bit of everywhere..! Some of it is good… and some of it not so much.”

Wringing his hands nervously, he stared at the ground with a nervous expression. Leaning back, he laughed weakly. Raising a brow, she reached out, placing her hand on top of his.

“Do you need to take a break? I can cancel tonight’s stream while we’re still ahead.”

The words “take a break” resonated in the streamer’s mind, like crashing tidal waves against his conscious. His chest tightened at the thought. Take a break? And undo all that hard work he had put in? It was just a little stress, nothing he couldn’t handle! Nothing some alone time before a stream couldn’t fix.

Squeezing his hands gently, Ame stood up carefully. Untangling his locked fingers from one another, she rubbed her thumb against the palm of his shaky hands. She always seemed to take care of him when he couldn’t take care of himself. She was more than his roommate. More than just his moderator. She was his friend. Even if he sometimes found himself wishing for more.

“… Naa! Why would I, the internet’s darling angel, ever need to take a break? I just wanted to tell my darling Ame how I’m feeling~ is it a crime to tell Moderator Ame things! Gasp! Am I going to internet jail!?”

Gasping, he placed his hand over his chest, shaking his head and dramatically stumbling around . Turning over his heel, he stumbled back, dramatically landing on top of Ame’s lap. She yelped, then, facepalmed in annoyance. Wrapping an arm around Ame’s shoulder, he nuzzled up against the smaller girl.

“Honey Buns, relax! I’ve got it all under control!”

“Angel… is your idea of having things under control smoking magic grass until your mind is too numb to perceive problems?

Laughing nervously, Angel sat up straight before stumbling out of Ame’s reach. Forcing a smile, he pointed at the paper in front of Ame’s desk with twinkling eyes.

“Didn’t you say you were trying to get the confirmation for the studio visit with Miss Robynn? You should get back to that, while I get ready for the next stream!”

Silence fell between the two roommates, hanging heavily in the air. It almost felt suffocating to Angel. He felt sick to his stomach. Trying to confide in his dear friend, only to backpedal, and not take himself seriously… he felt like such a joke.

…

I hope Ame isn’t upset because of me.

---

Sitting down in his room, Angel’s brows furrowed. Everything he needed to start the stream laid in front of him, the clothes, the makeup, the tweeter account for K-Angel. His eyes fell on Tweeter, the cacophony of voices and anons, swirling in hatred and vitriol, all aimed towards one person.

Him.

He didn’t understand, how could people be so hateful and cruel? He was the internet’s angel, yes, but he was still a person. His heart ached. Reaching over, he grabbed the pieces for his K-Angel persona. Even if he didn’t want to stream today, K-Angel would be streaming for all their adoring fans. And he couldn’t leave them hanging, no.

Pulling his computer close to his chest, he opened up his tweeter for K-Angel, tapping his fingers against his lips in deep thought. Eventually, once they had the budget and resources to do so, he'd turn over the tweeter account to a marketing professional. It should have made things easier for him, yet... He shook his head with a frown.

"Hey, cuties! It's your favorite angel! I'll be streaming shortly! I hope to see you there! ♥︎"

It didn't take long for the vitriol and venom to roll in.

Running his hands through his hair, he laughed hollowly. Closing his eyes, he mumbled. His eyes began to water, yet he bite his tounge. He could handle a little hate. He had to. Looking up at his computer, watery eyes fell onto the packet of Embian by his laptop's side. Hmm... Well, there's nothing a little embian couldn't fix, right?

Picking up the packet of Embian, he paused. His fingers twitched, he glanced at the chat with Ame. Maybe... just maybe he could try to reach out again...

...

Hah. He wished he could. Popping the Embian, he threw his head back, giggling with a smile. Rolling his neck, cocking it to the side, he cleared his throat.

"Hey, cuties!"

Smiling, he waved to the audience. Fake. All of it.

They despised him, and he despised them. They were nothing more than goddamned cowards. They only knew how to drag others down, they were only capable of causing harm, because their lives held such little meaning outside their own existence.

The instantaneous hate comments proved his point.

"Why would you say something like that... Seriously... What the hell is your problem?" Sneering, Angel rubbed his face in frustration. They were always like this, hating and bitching for no other reason than to do so. "Don't you see that I'm over here, busting my ass trying to stream every day? You goddamned cowards."

Rage bubbled in his voice, slight agony behind each word. Squeezing his arms tightly, he couldn't help it. His body ached from hours alone, just his thoughts and razor blade. Cutting deeper than any words could. Slicing deeper than any memory was capable of doing. Hatred welled up from deep within his chest, his hands trembling.

"All you know is how to drag others down with you, like leeches, like parasites. To be honest... I'm sick of it. I mean, how empty is your life, that you have to bully someone online like a cracker barrel crackhead harassing the waitress?"

Gritting his teeth, his eyes fell on the chat. A slew of comments, friendly and not, flooded the chat. However... one commenter caught his eye.

rain_candy >> ... Angel ?

... He felt like he was going to be sick. His throat burned as he clasped his hands over his mouth. Gagging, he tried to suppress the rising bile in his throat to no avail.

...

The stream cut out before anyone could make much sense of the transpiring events. His palms trembled, covered in the sins of his own anger. He felt ill. Shaking, he grimaced as he looked at himself in the glare of the monitor. It was all over him. He felt gross. There was only fluid, thankfully, but he didn't feel very comforted.

Tears welled up in his eyes, hands trembling in panic. He barely recognized himself.

"Oh my god, Angel- Holy shit, you look terrible-"

Grimacing at the voice coming from behind him, he coughed. Everything burned. He felt so stupid. Groaning, he whined as Ame lifted a towel to his mouth, gently patting away the vomit from his face.

"Ough... it's everywhere... Gross... Let me get you new clothes so we can wash those as soon as possible."

... he felt a bit of a fool. Yet, he couldn't help but lean into the gentle and caring touch. The soft hands, the towel, the love and care and attention. He probably looked extremely pathetic, shaking and in tears. He felt so riled up... and he couldn't justify any of it.

"... Sorry..."

Tugging the vomit-covered clothes off his person, Ame grimaced as she scooped them into the towel. Sighing, she pointed towards the shower. She didn't have to say anything, he already knew. He felt too ill to not take one.

Fumbling out of the chair, he stumbled out of the streaming room. There was so much happening in such a short time. He felt like everything was falling apart. It was so painful. Why was he such a mess? He couldn't even take care of himself. He felt so guilty.

---

Sometimes, it takes a little more than a good night's rest and care from a dear friend to get better. Sitting on the edge of the bed, she ran her hand along the back of the sleeping streamer's neck. Dragging her nails lightly through his hair, her eyes fell on his phone. Constantly flashing, constantly buzzing. Tweeter occupied his home screen like it was a virus. Shifting onto her knees, Ame scooped up the buzzing phone. Disgust, hatred, and vitriol filled his home screen. Did they even sleep?

Shaking her head, she shifted back onto the side of the bed. Grabbing his hand gently, she pressed his thumb against the home button. Unlocking the phone, she entered Tweeter, she grimaced in pain. A feed filled to the brim with hatred... no wonder he fell so violently ill.

...

"Ame... Ame..."

Leaning against the doorway, Angel whined softly. Stumbling into Ame's office, he wrapped his arms around her shoulders from behind. Nuzzling his face into her neck, he whined again.

"Ame... Ame, I'm hungry..."

"Make yourself something to eat then."

Mumbling softly, Ame reached up, gently placing her hand on his head. Earning another whine from the boy, she shook her head. Tightly gripping onto her, Angel huffed again.

"Nuh-uh. It's your turn to cook, I have to get ready for tonight's stream, duh."

The stream... Her brows furrowed in frustration as she thought about it. He had made himself sick because he felt the need to stream and puked on camera as a result. It was painfully clear he was destroying himself for something that didn't seem to be worth it anymore. Having fun wasn't worth it if it was inflicting pain.

"... Maybe you shouldn't. At least, not right now... I mean, just looking at my tweeter timeline and /st/... I think you need to take a break."

"... I can't do that. We have no other source of revenue. And, if I can't handle a little bit of hate, what good am I? I'm fine! It's fine. We're..."

Nausea hit his chest like tidal waves as his eyes fell on the open tweeter feed on his roommate's phone.

>> I WILL PROTECC KANGEL >> I love kangel, and I love seeing cute girls puke, so I'm happy! >> ive always hated kangel lmaaaooo

Gagging, he let go of Ame, stumbling backward. Clasping his hands over his mouth, bile rose from his throat. Running out of the room, Ame could hear Angel emptying out his already empty stomach. Sighing, she stood up, following him out of the room. Kneeling down by his side, she gently rubbed his back. Groaning, Angel slumped over on his side, laying his head on Ame's lap. Tears welled up in his eyes as he choked back a sob. He felt like shit. Someone. Anyone.

Save me.

...

"Maybe if I just try and stream like normal, maybe no one will really care! I mean, internet phenomena pass really quickly. In a week's time, I'm sure only internet freaks will remember, and it says more about them than it does me."

Laughing weakly, he tugged on the edge of his collar. His usual outfit was still drying from the events of last night, so wearing that was out of the question. Thankfully, K-Angel has many alternative outfits he could wear. His chest still ached, his throat burned in protest, his eyes watered slightly, but he couldn't let that stop him. Ame didn't have a job, and for now, this was their only source of income.

Laying his head in his hands, he tried to ignore the constant clicks and dings on his computer. Texts, DMs, posts, notifications, screen after screen after screen, god, why wouldn't they be silent? Groaning, he mumbled to himself. He knew, sure, if this didn't work out in the end, he could always fall back on his parents and sister. Sure, it wasn't the most ideal situation for him, one of his fathers was wholly absent, always at work, always off at some bar, always with someone else. His sister was okay, sure. A little mischievous, sure, and always a bit off-kilter (something about a thing named Aha?) but she was far from the worst. And his other father... he didn't want to think about it. But, at least he had somewhere to fall back. Ame didn't.

He hated to think about it like this. But, for Ame, he was all she had. He was all she had left, and he was the person she entrusted with his safety. She had no family, no safe spaces to go, and her memory seemed to short-circuit more and more often. If he wasn't careful, there was a chance she'd leave, and never be seen again. That thought scared him. He couldn't help it, he felt... oddly drawn to her. He wanted to be able to give her a good life, it's why he got into streaming in the first place. If he could make it big, he could always care for her and himself. And he'd never have to rely on anyone else, ever again.

But the internet is a place he despised. Even while being at its mercy. He hoped it exploded someday.

...

"Heya, cuties! It's me, your darling internet angel! Here for you through thick and thin ♥︎"

He was usually good at faking it, just enough to get through to the ending of a stream. He'd done it for 19 years on end, just enough faking to get by. Be a functional member of society, be kind, polite, and courteous. Societal norms...

Those only apply to misfits, don't they? And misfits can't win with normies. Ever.

He could feel his stomach churning again. At least this time, Ame made him take a bucket wherever he went.

"Let's get onto today's topic! Which is... corned beef!"

He's never actually had corned beef before. He didn't know why in particular this was what he decided to talk about. Ame has some in the fridge... maybe he should ask Ame if he can try some.

... If there was any more left by the time he remembered to ask.

"Corned beef is quite odd, right? It can come in a plastic package, or in a can...! But it's still the same thing... and another thing, it's actually called brisket in some stores. I mean, who was in charge of marketing there?"

Shaking his head, he placed a hand on his chin. "Brisket, the version of corned beef that comes in plastic packages rather than cans, comes in many shapes and forms! Sometimes, it's thinly cut" - he could see the hate comments flooding in, seriously, his puke? Talk about beating a dead horse - "or a thicker cut, and the quality, it's just never consistent! I mean, come on" - more comments, begging him to puke, to ruin himself all over again. Hah. He wouldn't give them the chance - "And the canned stuff? Looks like a cold corpse, bread's dead cousin! And corned beef hash? What even is that! No, like, seriously, what is it supposed to be used for?" These comments were getting on his fucking nerves. Seriously. Get a grip, commentators.

"... Never mind, I don't want to talk about it anymore. Let's talk about something else!" Pointing at the camera, he sneered. "Hey, hey commentator "puke-a-cola", I have a question for you! Do you know what's more confusing than corned beef?" Tilting his head, he relished in their panic. Online trolls are never prepared for a personal callout. "Hey, hey commentator "karma-wheel", do you know the answer? Or, or, "weed-killer"? Come on, don't any of you have the answer? Or, are all your brains filled with puuukeee? Gross, squishy, there's so little in there."

>> Ugh, attacking your fans? Talk about pathetic lol

Furrowing his brows in frustration, he scoffed.

"If I'm sooo pathetic, then, stop watching, crackhouse cockguzzlers! Close the damn stream! Or are you sooo obsessed with me, trying to gain a glimpse of me puking?! Perverts!"

Gripping his fist, his teeth sank into the skin of his thumb. Grumbling to himself in frustration, he laughed bitterly. The comments kept rolling in, one atop another. Shocked, offended, hateful, concerned, all sorts of comments rolled in. His stomach stirred, a wave of disgust and hatred boiling within himself. He hated them he hated them he hated them he hated them he hated them he hated them he hated them he hated them he hated them-

"I mean, what are you? A sadist? Oh, I bet you reallllyyyyy love to see others suffer! You just get off to their sobs, their pain, and SUFFERING. You disgust me, you're sick, you're sick, you're sick!"

He couldn't hold it back any longer. Any more and they'd get exactly what they'd want. He can't control his body, but he'll be damned if they get it.

...

The stream ended abruptly. She could hear him in the background, wrenching, puking his guts out. She felt bad for him, she wanted to help him, she really did. But...

He didn't want help. He was always too proud to accept it.

Sighing, Ame pondered. Does she want to go over, and see how he's faring? He was pretty angry with those commentators... she didn't want him to be angry with her too. Mumbling to herself, she curled up in her wheely chair, she pulled out her phone. Leaning on her fist, Ame couldn't help but mindlessly scroll.

If he wants my help... he'll come to me.

Scrolling through Tweeter, Ame paused a moment. Sitting up in her chair, she narrowed her eyes in worry.

>> His real name is Satoru, apparently. >> wait? Like, the sorcerer? No way! >> I heard he's also a shut-in who always skips out on school! >> and his moderator? I heard he's trapped her in their relationship, she's got no way out even if she wanted.

That... isn't good. No wonder he was so sick as of late.

... she didn't know if she should tell him or not. That might cause a spiral. Well, if he finds out on his own... either option isn't quite ideal.

---

"Urgh..."

Why were there so many eyes everywhere? Watching him, staring at him, waiting for him. Watching, observing, staring, witnessing... Was he even safe in his own home anymore? The scratching on the floor, the taps on the window, the nails on the wood... make it stop. Please. Someone. Anyone.

Running his hands through his hair, he grimaced, hissing in pain. The endless ping-ing from his laptop felt like a dawning, bellowing, shaking the room like a giant slamming its hands into the ground. Shaking an already unstable structure. Was everything falling around him? He felt so scared.

>> a metube with no angel... >> angels don't really exist... >> You won't believe why the famous streamer "OMGkawaiiangel" is being flamed online! >> Apparently people found out K-Angel's identity! And he's the son of a famous sorcerer! Who would have known? The plot thickens!

Stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it stop it STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT-

Gripping his hair in panic, a weak sob escaped his throat. Tears welled up in his eyes, a painful feeling filling up his chest. The doorbell - [ ding! ding! ding! ] - oh please, not the doorbell. Ringing in his ears, ringing, ringing, ringing, and ringing. It hurts, it hurts, it hurts so much. It's a burning, raw sensation, knawing at his skin. - [ ding! ding! ding! ] - It tears at his skin, a sickening sensation, painful and gruesome. And the tapping on the window - [ tap! tap! tap! ] - god god make it stop. Leave me alone LEAVE ME ALONE - [ tap! tap! tap! ] - please please PLEASE.

"... Angel?"

The eyes, in the corners of the room, from the windows, from the computer. They're all there, staring at him, watching him. Never looking away, never blinking, always watching. Aggressive, knawing dread. Tearing him apart, bit by bit, piece by piece. A dissection, all for your entertainment !

"Angel??"

Please. Please, god. If there even was a god out there. Please. His hands gripped the bloody box cutter tighter. ... when did he get a hold of that? Everything was blending together. His wrists hurt. His skin burned. Maybe it would help him feel better. It didn't. He was desperate to feel something. Anything.

"Angel? Where did you go...?"

Were they already inside? God, no, please. Anything but invading his personal space. Ugh, there really is no end to them, like gross little maggots, writhing inside his internet-ridden corpse... the visual made him feel a little sick. I can hear their footsteps outside. His eyes fell on the bloody box cutter. Sharp and small. He could rule it as self-defense, they stepped into his property. This would be their fault. They deserved every scar. They both did.

"Angel-! Angel!"

...

Blood dripped from a small, thin gash on her cheek. A crimson-red liquid welled up and overflowed, staining rosy cheeks in foul blood. Tears pricked the edges of her eyes, a tight feeling rising in her chest. The box cutter lay only an inch away from her face, gripped in his shaking hand, thick and viscous blood dripping silently from the tip of his blade and the wounds from his arm... and onto the ground.

Die. You don't deserve to be in this world, in my world. Get out, get OUT.

Die. Stop screaming, stop crying. It's so grating, so painful. This is your fault. You came to my house, through my door, into my room to torment me. This is your fault.

Die. Stop struggling. You asked for this! Watching me so closely, never turning your gaze to anyone or anything else. Didn't you want this? My attention? My gaze? I'm giving it allllll to you! Cut by cut. slice by slice. Vessel by vessel. Craving out a personal autograph, just for you ♥︎

Squelch ♥︎ Squelch ♥︎ ! Squishy ♥︎ Squish ♥︎ ! Tearing. Dismantling. Dissecting. Dying ♥︎ Dying. Dying. And then...

... pure silence. All pure silence now, not a sound in earshot. No eyes in sight. No tapping on the windows. No people at the door. Just, pure and uninterrupted bliss. Was this heaven? At that moment, all he could hear was the sound of Ame's blood, soaking the bedroom floor.

Kill me.

---

"I didn't know how to care for a guppy fish. So, I did a lot of research! But it died really quickly anyway. I don't even remember its name. I wish I was like that guppy."

His words no longer seemed to be making much of any sense. As of late... it was like he was lost in his own mind. I was so worried he'd do something drastic. That he'd harm himself, that he'd do something that he could never come back from, that he'd be unretrievable from his own mind.

"Heya, cuties! I have some unfortunate news today before the stream starts!"

He held a small portrait in his arms. Blood soaked the inner frame, and a small, frail-looking girl rested inside, behind the glass. She was a small, petite girl, with deep purple hair, soft purple eyes, snow like freckles.

"My one and only moderator left me! I don't know where she went... But, my withered pride won't take me until I'm satisfied ♥︎ So, streams will be planned and moderated by yours truly until I can find someone to cover ♥︎ meaning... well, there might be a couple delays in the foreseeable future... so, stay by my side, cuties ♥︎ As I guide you to the light."

There was a smile on his face, a soft grin matched with empty eyes. The light that shone in them has long since faded. But, he felt nothing, but pure ecstasy. Like he was floating upon some imaginary clouds, far above where anything could reach him. This was true, unadulterated bliss.

"You know, bad people are often referred to as "demons", right? You know, "so-and-so is a DEMON lol" and whatnot? But, is that really true?"

"Demons only killed like... 10 people tops. Meanwhile... God killed like 2 million! That's a lot more than any demon has ever done!"

"Soo... if someone does something reaaaally bad... doesn't it make more sense to call them God?"

.....

Jrypbzr gb gur Vagrearg Natry'f Fgernz!

Abj, fur vf gehyl unccl.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

ENDING ?? - INTERNET OVERDOSE ♥︎

>> Try Again? > Yes!! > No!!

[slasheddreams]

Ground Control to Psychoelectric Angel [ bag of marshmallows / broken glass / blood rain ]

This story will contain the following themes, as well as a heavy emphasis on more adult themes and humors, including a portrayal of a romantic/intimate relationship between Angel and Ame.

content warning for: [ inspired by Needy Streamer Overload and the Ground Control to Psychoelectric Angel Ending ] [ heavy themes of love bombing, themes of affection and desire, brief mentions of self-harm/self-neglect, mention of taking drugs/coercing someone into taking drugs, brief mentions of childhood neglect, partial themes of memory loss/amnesia, and things of the like. ]

Even if we're on different wavelengths, I know you'll still understand me, and that's what I love about you.

There was always some kind of saying about love. I don't actually remember what it was, something stupid most likely.

Rain.

Angel wouldn't lie, he loved the rain... when it was pouring outside and he wasn't stuck walking in it. Sighing slowly, he pulled out his umbrella. Opening it slowly, he groaned.

He hated working at the convenience store so badly. The pay was so bad, the customers were abysmal at best, gross at worst, and the manager was just awful. And he was always stuck with the closing shift. While he knew this place wasn't overly dangerous, walking home in the dark was still... frightening. Taking the train alone at night already sucked, but having to travel in the rain and the fog?

Looking around as he stepped out into the rain, he sighed again. The rain was so dreary and heavy, it was... depressing. His shoes weren't made for the rain, but, rain shoes weren't made for work either... Maybe he'd have to start bringing rain shoes to work. That would be very... annoying. But, at least his feet wouldn't be so soaked next time. His shoes clicked against the ground, and light thuds of rain jumped from puddle to puddle as he walked. The sound of cars running down the street constantly filled his ears, the sound of the rain against the cars' roofs and against the stores' roofs. It was almost tranquil... if it wasn't for the splashing of water from rushing cars and drunken bystanders stumbling around and into him.

Grimacing as a man drunkenly fumbled into him, Angel huffed. This was hellish. Placing one hand on the man's shoulder, he lightly directed the man in an opposing direction. He could tell the man was drunk beyond belief, but he didn't want this man to become a big problem. He simply didn't have the desire to deal with unnecessary issues like that.

His father would tell him to have more "sympathy" in a situation like this. He wondered where that sympathy was for him during all those empty nights.

...

He didn't realize how far he strayed, leading the stumbling drunken man away from the busy street. Looking around, Angel paused a moment. He couldn't tell if it was due to the heavy rain limiting his vision, but, he was unable to identify any landmarks or anchor points. He felt... a little lost.

Just his luck.

His head turned from side to side slowly, grumbling as he down the several alleyways. In the distance, he could vaguely make out the shape of a tent and a figure, sitting out in the heavy rain. Most likely a homeless person... he was there once. It wasn't fun.

Taking a deep breath, he grimaced. He didn't own a phone, hell, he couldn't afford a phone. He only had two options. Try to find his own way back... or ask the homeless person in front of him. Neither option seemed particularly appealing.

Grumbling to himself, he hesitantly moved forward, towards the person ahead of him. His heels clicked in the heavy rain, slowly coming to a stop before the log the person sat on.

"Excuse me?"

His voice felt a little hoarse coming out of his throat like that. It sounded a little strained... a little weak. It hurt to hear himself like that.

But it did its job of garnering the attention of the homeless person in front of him. A young woman, wearing a cloth cloak, with thick, long purple hair glanced at him, ever so slightly. Nothing more than a side glance... he couldn't blame her.

"Do I know you?"

"... I don't think I do."

Angel's hand hovered over his chest slightly, and he could have sworn the woman's disappointment hung in the air. It felt so heavy... There was a moment of sadness on the girl's face, and then, she sighed, leaning her head to the side ever so slightly.

"You're lost too, aren't you?"

Angel grimaced to himself. Was it really that obvious? Biting his tongue, he nodded in response. The girl hummed slightly, nodding back.

"I was wondering if you knew how to get to the train station...? I can figure the rest out from there, but..."

The girl craned her head to the side, looking at the ground solemnly. Her eyes focused on the ground as if she were averting Angel's gaze.

"I... have memory issues. Even if I knew, I've probably forgotten by now. I don't even know my own name. It's a little sad."

Angel paused a moment, grimacing. He... felt a little bad. But he didn't ask for a sob story either. Grumbling, he took a step forward, haphazardly holding the umbrella out slightly. In doing so, the rain falling on the girl lessened. It wasn't a perfect fix, of course, he didn't know how long it had been raining on the poor thing... but something was better than nothing.

"Then, mind helping me find it? I'll buy you some food for the trouble."

It wasn't the perfect solution, of course. He barely knew the chick, and he barely knew the area either. Hell, buying her food for this one favor might put himself out of a meal. But, he knew one thing. Creeps would be less likely to try anything if they thought he was with someone. And...

He really didn't care.

He could survive with one less meal. He's done it before. He can do it again. Pausing, the girl seemed to... hesitate a moment. Standing up straight, she looked at the man a second time, then, diverted her gaze once more.

"Food. I like the way you make deals."

"... My name's Angel."

It wasn't really, but, he hated his real name. Both his first name... and his last. The girl was silent a moment, and then she reached out, hesitantly grasping ahold of the outstretched umbrella. Tilting his head slightly, he found her hand... a little odd. She wore five metallic claw coverings, one covering each finger. They were all unique with interesting markings, yet, they didn't seem to hinder her movement even slightly.

"... the name Ame means rain, right?"

"... it does. It also means candy, I think."

"I like that. Can you call me Ame?"

Pausing a moment, Angel nodded slowly. Ame... it was a nice name. But, naming yourself after the rain sounded... a little depressing. But, he wouldn't knock her for it.

...

Ame didn't talk much. Angel wasn't expecting her to, but, still. A little effort would have been nice. The silence weighed down so heavily... Angel thought it was going to crush him.

"... your memories."

It blurted out suddenly, like an unprepared confession to your middle school crush.

"My memories?"

His mind felt like it was going to explode. He turned towards Ame, his soaking off-white hair clinging to his face like a leech. He swore, every time he tried to wipe it out of his face, it would just frizz up and get back in the way.

"Yeah. You uh, you mentioned that you have memory issues back in the alleyway."

"... did I?"

... he groaned, resisting the urge to roll his eyes. Was it really that poor? He almost felt a little bad. Keyword: almost.

"It's... true. My memory is quite poor..."

Glancing away, Ame's gaze fell on a nearby bookstore. Her pace slowed down a little until the two ground to a complete halt. The wind chill was particularly bad that day, he felt like he was going to shatter into tiny, angel-sized pieces if they stopped too suddenly. He wondered how she seemed so unbothered by it.

"I can't remember anything. My family, my hometown, my friends if I had any... I don't even remember my name. I am... old, but not too old I think."

"Old, but not too old, huh? I'm 17 years old."

"I think the old woman I met last... it was something about becoming a... "real adult"? I don't... uhm... you know?"

"... A real adult would be an 18-year-old. And, y'know I think I kind of get the point."

"I would say it's been this way as long as I can remember... but then it becomes a little ironic. What is this place?"

Her gaze fixated on the bookstore in front of her, never wavering. Angel paused, then, hesitantly, he pointed up, towards the sign of the shop.

"It's a bookstore. They sell books and magazines in there. Some of them even sell toys and figurines, or disks and DVDs."

"It looks magical in there."

Turning towards Angel, her lips pursed a little, as if a question perched itself on the edge of her lips. A question he wasn't sure if she even remembered wanting to ask.

"... did you want to go inside?"

He wasn't... completely sure why he asked if he was being honest. He wanted nothing more than to find the train station and go back to his home. He wanted nothing more than to change out of these damn clothes that clung to his back, to heat up his day-old leftovers, eat, and smoke until he couldn't feel anything anymore. It was the only thing capable of soothing this mind-numbing pain that knawed at his skin day by dreadful day. Yet... she seemed so curious. He couldn't help but wonder, he thought to himself.

Ame nodded slowly, seeming... almost a little hesitant. He had never seen her smile, he thought to himself. Taking the umbrella from Ame's hand, he closed it, gently shaking off any excess rain before taking a step forward. Holding his umbrella, he carefully placed in it one of the provided "rain bags", ensuring the water from his umbrella wouldn't get everywhere in the shop. Then, turning to Ame, he grimaced. Her cloak... was soaked. Hesitantly, he reached over towards Ame, his hand scrapping against her face lightly as he pulled the hood back.

He didn't realize how pretty she was without it. Her eyes were such a pretty purple color, and there were snow-like freckles dotting her skin that he hadn't noticed before.

"... You have to take off your cloak before you can go inside though. We can put it inside one of these free rain bags. You can... borrow my raincoat. It might be a little big though."

Pointing toward the rain bags with his other hand, Angel paused. Ame glanced at his hand for a moment before nodding. She wasn't wearing much underneath the cloak, he realized. But what she did have on underneath the cloak was relatively dry... they could work with that, he supposed. Carefully, he took off the light blue raincoat he wore, holding it out towards her. It's a shame. That coat kept him somewhat warm.

"Here. Put it on. You look sleazy."

Pushing the door open with his arm, he motioned to Ame to follow him inside the bookstore. It felt something akin to bringing a child into a candy store. He didn't think someone could be so... amazed by something so simple.

Yet, she always seemed to find something new. And asking new questions. Just when he thought he finally ironed out the last one, like a kid in a candy store, she had a new one.

"What's "entomology"?" "Study of bugs." "Oh... ooo."

"It Ends With Us...? Who is us?" "... the people in the book?? I guess."

"What's astrology?" "Stuff about the stars. And star signs." "Star signs???"

Eventually, she settled down, seeming satisfied with the answers to her many... many questions. It felt like an eternity in there (it was only 10 minutes, though.) before Ame walked close to Angel, holding a small book in her hands. Hesitantly, she held it out towards him.

"... what's this?"

"It's a book about... space. And planets. And it's only 500 yen."

500 yen? That was... quite a normal price for a short book like that. He sighed a bit, crossing his arms as he held the book in his hand. His brows furrowed slightly as he eyed the book, then, grimacing, he scoffed as he reached into his pocket. Pulling out his wallet, he opened it up with another grimace frown. He really didn't have the spending money to be doing this.

He didn't know why, but this girl's unadulterated excitement for simple leisure had him so... smitten. He remembers a time when he was excited about his first book too, he supposed.

"Here. Go get it, it won't get any cheaper."

It would get cheaper, he thought, as he handed her a 500 yen coin. It would get cheaper. But she might not be around still when it finally does. An expression of shock flashed on Ame's face, and then, a soft smile replaced it. ... She looked really pretty when she smiled.

"Yay! Thank you... Angel?"

"Oh, hey. You remembered my name."

...

The rain seemed to have let up while they were busy accidentally shopping. How quaint. It hadn't let up completely, but the rain wasn't nearly as heavy anymore.

Looking around, Angel tilted his head. Then, as if on cue, Ame pointed toward the train station in the distance.

"Is that the train station you were looking for, Angel?"

"It was. You're so observant."

He noticed it way before she had. It was nice to see she didn't lose track of their literal one and only objective, he thought. Food... he did promise her that much. She was a good travel partner. He briefly wondered if they could be more. He didn't know why. Shaking his head, he wanted to launch that thought out of there. Why was he thinking about that? He wasn't that lonely.

Right?

"Do you have a favorite thing to eat?"

"... You're still buying me food?"

She sounded surprised by his question, taken a little aback. Angel turned and shrugged. His hair curled against his shoulders, bouncing lightly in the wind.

"I promised you. You help me find it, I'll buy you food from it. There's a 7-11 inside, I can buy you some chicken or some bread. Whatever you want."

Holding out his hand gently, Ame paused. Hesitantly, she reached out, a shaky hand hovering about his, never touching down. Sighing, Angel reached up, grabbing onto her hand, and tugging her closer.

"Come on! You can just jump the bar."

"H-Hey, wait-"

---

There was always some kind of saying about love. I think it was something about being blind?

He hummed softly as he picked up a book off the massive bookshelf. Ame's curiosity never did die out. She used to have to beg with him, to plead for him to buy her "just one more book". It was never just one book... but she was always so endearing about it. Even now and again, he finds her clinging to his arm whenever they walk past a bookstore.

Running his fingers lightly over the cover, he cocked his head to the side. His eyes felt on the silver lettering on the cover.

"Space and Planets... Wasn't this the book I bought for Ame when we first met?"

His fingers slid across the cover, gently hooking around it, and then, tugging lightly, the cover flipped over, a flurry of pages dancing in the wind. The pages were all covered in sticky notes, hand-written notes all over the book, stuck to every page.

... so that was where all his sticky notes disappeared off to. A rainy day on a closing shift and one book has opened the path to so much more... He almost missed it, a bit. Well, he didn't miss most of it. He didn't miss the grueling work schedule or the nasty customers, nor did he miss the drunken trash crowding the streets. He didn't miss the commutes, or the traveling, the pay was abysmal, the manager was certainly a piece of work, and he just... okay, correction. He didn't miss anything about the life he was about to leave behind. He just felt oddly melancholic now that it was all over.

Closing the book with a soft 'thud', Angel smiled gently. He knew most of Ame's books would have to go into storage, with the new streaming setup incoming, he simply didn't have the space for it all to fit... but it wouldn't hurt to keep the one, he thought to himself. And... it wouldn't hurt to see what all Ame had collected from him over the years either.

Entomology... the study of bugs. He hated bugs with a passion, creepy crawling creatures gave him the shudders. They were all the same, and they all needed to stay outside. They keep in their homes, and he'll stay in his own. There would be no issues. Ame didn't seem to care much for it beyond the first read, he noted. She wasn't too keen for a reread. She reread books a lot.

It Ends With Us was atrocious. He regretted spending money on it. It presented its topics horribly, without grace or tact. It led to an awkward talk with Ame, like explaining the birds and the bees to a child. He should burn it.

Astrology... Ame made him buy a couple books about it. She seemed to enjoy the topic a lot. Ame showed an interest in all things space and the stars... it was like a one-way trip on The Galatic Express. Star signs were a particular favorite of Ame's, she had four books on just those alone... she made learning new things look so hot he was kind of mad. Book nerds shouldn't be allowed to be hot. That should be illegal.

Tilting the cover of the book in his hand, he chuckled. Tossing the book into the cardboard box and shifting back on one foot, Angel tilted his head. Glancing over the now empty space, he tapped his chin softly. The first computer monitor could go over there... and the second monitor could go over there... he bought one of those rainbow keyboards-

A gentle knock on the door snapped Angel out of a planner's daze. Glancing over, his eyes fluttered slightly, falling on the young woman, standing in the doorway. Her messy purple hair was pulled back into a weak bun, and she wore a gorgeous deep purple silk robe gown and an oversized white cotton shirt. He briefly wondered what she'd look like wearing less.

"I finished packing up everything in the bedroom, Angel... I'm tired though. Moving the boxes to the living room has me exhausted..."

Chuckling softly, he leaned closer to Ame, his fingers lightly clinging along the silk ribbon tied around her waist. Tugging along the ribbon lightly, he wanted nothing more than to pull it off of her and watch it fall. But in that moment, she felt so far away. His fingers entwined themselves between the layers of ribbon, lightly locking around the silk fabric before gently tugging the woman towards him. Ame yelped in response, fumbling slightly as her foot took a step forward. Her hands lightly bumped against Angel’s chest, hovering against his shoulders.

“You’re like a war machine. So deadly and silent, yet so effective~ I just finished up with the spare books in this room, I still have so much I need to do to get this room fully set up…”

Ame paused a moment, then, with furrowed brows, she shook her head firmly. Gently, she slammed her hands against his shoulder, letting them rest there as she spoke.

“But you’ve been working and building things all day. You deserve to have a break too! Come and take a quick nap with me… You tend to be a jackass when you're tired. Well, you're a jackass all the time, it just gets worse when you're tired.”

"Wooooooow."

Rolling his eyes in response, Angel debated shoving her away by her little silk waist. Maybe she'd trip over the box and fall. But... that would only be proving her point though. Damn. Sighing, he paused. Her pout was so... annoyingly cute. The ribbon slipped through his fingers as he lifted his hand. Lightly sliding his fingers through her hair, Angel leaned closer to the pouting girl's face. He wanted nothing more than to wipe that stupid pout off of her stupid pretty little face.

...

Her lips felt a lot softer than he initially imagined. He was never quite aware of it until that very moment. His fingers twitched slightly, a small tug, a weak embrace. Dragging his nails along Ame's bare skin, he pulled away slightly, the air feeling so cool on their lips. Part of him craved more... he wasn't sure why.

"... na, I'm not tired! Maybe after all the technicals are set up."

"ANGEL..."

Snickering slightly, Angel's hands rested on Ame's shoulders lightly. Her face was dusted pink, although, he barely saw it. Covering her face in her sleeves, she stumbled out of the room, cursing his name the entire way out. Rubbing his hand through his hair, he chuckled again. Worth it.

...

Yawning, Angel set down the screwdriver. His eyes fluttered, his vision blurring slightly, fatigue really was a whole different kind of beast. Closing his eyes a moment, he groaned. He couldn't fall asleep, not yet. Yawning again, his fingers entwined within themselves as he moved his arms, stretching dreary limbs.

Shaking his head, Angel rubbed his face in annoyance. Building furniture sucked. Moving boxes sucked. Packing up items they had no use for sucked. Moving the boxes from the house into the car sucked. He didn't have money, he couldn't afford any treats, everything just sucked. And those boxes? Having to move them into storage all on his lonesome? Oh hoo hoooo, don't get me started, I will be here alllll day. It just... sucked.

Shifting onto his back, Angel groaned. He lay, sprawled out on the floor in a (quite pathetic) tired display of desperation. He didn't want to get up and disturb his sleeping beauty in bed, but he was truly dead tired. His fingers lingered on his lips, a small mumble escaping from his mouth. He felt... well, he didn't feel guilty persay. He enjoyed it, he enjoyed it a lot. She tasted like cherry sweets, it was such a sweet taste on his lips. Part of him craved more.

... and the other part of him felt bad.

Mumbling, he shifted onto his side. Running his hand through his hair, he grumbled. Maybe taking a nap on the floor wouldn't be so bad. He could set up his streaming set up when he woke up again. He wouldn't have to go very far, at least. Arugh... no, he couldn't do that... For starters, that'd be painful when he woke up, he'd probably be cold, his neck would certainly ache, and he didn't want to think more about it whatsoever. Groaning, he reluctantly sat up, dragging shaky nails through his hair.

Sighing, he grumbled again. Standing up shakily, he mumbled. Stumbling through the dark apartment, Angel gritted his teeth. His fingers laid on the doorway, the dim lighting from the outside room lighting up the room slightly. The light made her look so heavenly, even if she was simply swallowed up by the several colorful blankets in their shared bed. Taking a step forward, Angel yawned again. Sitting on the edge of the bed, he yawned again. The bed caved slightly underneath his weight, causing sleepy protests to slip from Ame's lips. Leaning back, he sank into the soft fabric of the bed, yawning again.

Yeah, this was definitely more comfortable than sleeping on the floor, by a mile.

His hair curled against the pillow, his fingers twitching against his bare skin. His eyes fell on Ame's sleeping figure, watching as she gently tossed and turned in her sleep, before settling on her side, her fingers lightly gripping onto his arm. Her head laid against his shoulder, her hair tied back, laid neatly behind her on the bed. She looked so peaceful in her slumber... he swore she was glistening almost.

"... it pisses me off how pretty you are sometimes."

It also pissed him off how fast he had fallen asleep afterward. Oh, she would have reveled in being right.

...

His head felt as if someone just rammed into him with a truck. His eyes fell on the slightly ajar door, the golden light peering through the cracks. Had he slept through the night, he wondered. Glancing over, Ame appeared to have gotten closer to him while he was asleep, now with her head lying against his chest, her hand resting underneath his shirt. Her fingers twitched slightly, and another set of protests slipped through sleepy lips, although he wasn't quite what it was she was protesting against.

Rubbing his head, he groaned. He still had a myriad of things he had to complete before he could even start his streaming career. But, he couldn't really do that while Ame slept on top of him... and she fell asleep before him. It must be so difficult being a pretty princess.

Let's see... he had already packed and taken all the boxes into the rented space, cleaned and dusted the area, and put up the pretty blackout curtains, as well as the special decorations they had bought to decorate the streaming space, and he built all the furniture they had bought. However... he still had to set up the computers, keyboards, and speakers, as well as try on the streaming outfits he bought and make the necessary alterations, try on all the makeup products...

But... it wouldn't kill him to rest a little longer.

---

"You got an email, Angel. It's about... rent."

.. Rent. That certainly was an issue he had to worry about, huh? Sitting down on the couch next to her, he slid his arm around her shoulder, leaning close. His eyes scanned the email, a frown creasing his face. Rent... if he couldn't get 10,000 followers, they'd be homeless.

"What are we going to do if we can't make money for rent in time..?"

His brows furrowed further, and disappointment edged in his voice. If he couldn't do it, they'd be homeless. He knew how unforgiving it was to be homeless, and to bring someone else out of it through your own efforts, only to be the reason they fall back into it? The thought made him nervous.

"I mean... I guess I could go back to living with my dad if it doesn't work out... But I'd really rather not go back to living with a man who was never around if I can help it."

Reaching out, his fingers brushed against her hair. His thumb lingered against her cheek, a look of bewilderment settling in on her face. He was homeless once himself, a long time ago. He had run away from home. His father hadn't even noticed. And he never came looking for him. There was no food in that house anyway. No food, no clean clothes, dirty dishes everywhere, rats in the walls, cut off electricity. He knew his father was doing better now, he even adopted a little orphan girl! Wow. He totally didn't feel any negative emotion towards that situation at all!

Totally.

"Aaaactually I'd rather die. Nevermind. We're gonna make rent, darling! We have to."

Leaning in, he gently and quickly pressed his lips against Ame's cheek, pinching her face with a chuckle. He wanted to take care of her. He wanted to give her a good house and a fair shot at life. He wants to be able to spoil her and shower her in gifts.

More than anything... he just wanted her to stay in his life. Even if she is just a nerd with a pretty face. Deep down, he knew it was something more. I just don't want to admit it.

"... Angel..."

Ame's fingers twitched slightly, hovering over her chest with an expression of worry. Angel never seemed to enjoy talking about his family. If anything... it always seemed to make him angry. She wondered what happened in his childhood that made him so angry.

...

Angel paused a moment, glancing down as he tilted his head. Ame's face lay lightly against his chest, her arms wrapped around his waist lightly. It was such a light and gentle hug... leaning over slightly, his fingers gently brushing against her skin, placing a gentle kiss on her forehead. He nuzzled her forehead with his own, a gentle smile crossing his face. He adored her, so so much.

"I'm okay. I swear."

"Are you sure..?"

"I am... and, we're going to make rent. And we're going to make a loooot of money. And we're going to live like kings and queens... because I am your favorite internet streamer."

Running his thumb along Ame's face, it briefly brushed against her lips. Lingering a moment, his mind wandered. To live like kings and queens... meant to live at the top, to be the best of the best. To eat the food they wanted to, to buy the clothes they wanted to buy, to purchase the house they wanted, to travel where their hearts desired, to love, lust, and desire as they pleased... he wondered if he was promising too much. He'd love to make her his queen... but he didn't want to overpromise, or underdeliver...

Heat flushed in his cheeks, a small grumble surfacing in his throat. His fingers froze up, twitching slightly where they lay. Oh, the things he'd do if he could just be shameless. Unfortunately, embarrassment was something that always had to hit a little too hard.

"I need to get ready for our first stream, Ame! Which means... you need to go set up things on the moderator's end!"

He was deflecting. He couldn't even look her in the eyes. While it was true they needed to set up... honestly, most of it could have waited. The embarrassment of his actions, however, would not let it.

He loved her so much that it was almost inconvenient at times.

---

They always say that love is blind. When you love someone, you don't see their faults. And, it's true. I only see stars when I look at you.

Ame had to plan the train transit from their house to the house that Angel's father and sister lived in. Of course, on paper, it wasn't that different of a task. In fact, Ame found it was much easier than she ever would have imagined. No need to switch lines, board multiple trains, or switch train stations completely. It was simply taking one train and riding with it for 2 and a half hours. She wasn't good with directions, of course, directions were always Angel's strong suit... she usually would get distracted, or even worse, lost.

She held a small notepad in her hands, a sparkly, purple glitter pen in her fingers. She peeked her head into the streaming room, her fingers lightly gripping the notepad. They had been streaming for 23 days on and off, and Ame would admit... she wasn't the best partner for this.

She couldn't do anything right. It didn't mean everything she did was wrong, however... but she wished she were more assertive, more demanding. Strong.

Angel worried her when he was stressed out. Drugs, bloodied box cutters, lashing out on stream and off stream, getting drunk... Ame felt like there was always something new he'd overdose himself on. Maybe if she were more assertive, made sure he rested and took the proper breaks, and just took better care of him... maybe he wouldn't be so unhappy behind the scenes.

"I'm 21. You seriously think I can't handle a visit to my father's house? I mean, the transit plan is sweet, but really? I can handle this."

He was always so... frustrated. Even when he was supposed to be relaxing. She didn't understand why, he always seemed so filled with vitriol and disdain. Not hatred, he loved too much to be filled with hatred. But something different, something more than Ame knew how to help. Her eyes fell on the small piece of colorful, stamp-like pieces pinned between his fingers. She grimaced.

"Is that... what was it called again? That really strong hallucinogen that you put on your tongue."

"... It's called Magic Paper. And, yeah, it is."

"I think that's proof enough that you can't handle a visit to your father's house tomorrow. I mean, I know you don't have a good relationship with him and I won't pry into why, but you're literally getting high the night before!"

Grimacing, Ame gripped the notebook tighter. She didn't enjoy lecturing him like this, and she certainly had no right. And she didn't have enough of a backbone to force him to stop. It all scared her, truly. Every last one of them, the alcohol, the box cutter, the lashing out... they helped but they never could solve the core of the issue. But the drugs were always the worst.

Her fingers twitched again. She just wanted him to be okay. But she didn't know how. There are a million different coping mechanisms out there, and she couldn't fight against any of them when it really mattered. He lifted his fingers, gently brushing them against her lips. She pulled away slightly, they tasted faintly bitter. Raising her hand, she gently pushed his hand down.

"Live a little, Ame."

His eyes widened, a small pout forming on his face. He held out his hand, his thumb gently shifting against the slick fabric of the magic paper. She took a step back instinctively, her eyes glued to the outstretched magic paper in front of her.

"You shouldn't knock it until you try it~! You're always so righteous and acting like such a goody two shoes. Don't you get stressed out too? Why are my ways of de-stressing sooo wrong?"

Standing up, he cocked his head to the side a bit, staring at Ame. Wide-eyed, unblinking. He took a slow step forward, closer to her. It didn't matter how far she backed up, he only ever kept getting closer.

"A-Angel-"

"Do you think lesser of me when I'm like this? I don't get it. I love you. I want to treat you like a princess and get you everything your little nerdy heart could ever want because I looove you."

"Angel, stop-"

The magic paper brushed her lips, Angel's fingers gently bumping against Ame's chin. Ame's hands trembled, her back pressed against the wall, tears welling up in her eyes. He was unbearable when he was stressed. She wanted him to stop, but he was more stubborn that she was capable. She could not help him. She couldn't even help herself.

"Please? Just ooone time? I'll never ask again. I promise."

His fingers hovered at the edge of her lips, the magic paper resting just above her. Drugs were bad, he clearly had an addiction, and he was going to overdose on them. She knew he was. But she wouldn't be able to stop him. She couldn't stop him from taking them. She couldn't even stop him from offering it to her now.

"... okay okay... just... one time, okay?"

"Mhm..."

His eyes were lidded, and a droopy smile formed on his face. He... wasn't sober when she got to him, was he?

"Oookay ♥︎ !! I love you. I looove you. I love you!"

Pushing on the edge of the magic paper, Ame grimaced. The paper felt odd on her tongue, a tingling sensation taking over her tongue and then, her whole body. It burned.

"..!"

Her vision blurred slightly, her knees buckling slightly. Colorful spots danced in her vision, a slight ringing fading into her ears. Her tongue burned slightly, her limbs weakening even further. A gasp escaped from her lips, a hand wrapping around her waist, pulling her close to his chest. Angel giggled slightly, his nails dragging along the bare skin of Ame's back, earning soft whines from her. His forehead gently bumped against hers, peppering soft kisses along her lips.

She could see something in her vision, a train station? A train station in a nowhere city. There was talking in the distance, but she could gleam anything being said. It sounded something like clicking and snapping, and ticking... and the train. It didn't make annny sound as it passed. She could feel the wind as it passed, but it passed so silently, she wondered if she had gone deaf.

There was a man in front of her, with white and brown hair, and the prettiest set of blue and pink eyes she had ever seen. There was something oddly familiar about him... Ame didn't know what. He stood at the edge of the waiting area for the train bordering. She looked around. She couldn't make out any faces besides his.

Fishes swam past her. They were giant, glowing pink fish... they reminded her of... what were they called again? Goldfish? Goldfish... She yelped slightly as one of these giant, glowing beasts swam behind her, gently nudging her forward. She fumbled forward, gripping onto her shirt shakily. He held out his hand with a familiar cheeky smile.

She felt so misplaced.

His fingers tugged her closer, a stumble backward here and a fumble backward there. The bed felt so soft underneath their bodies, it almost felt like floating on a cloud. His fingers ran against her bare skin, a deep hum emerging from his throat. His fingers gently entwined with hers, gently gripping onto her tightly.

"I looove looove you. I love you thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis much ♥︎"

...

His head throbbed, his vision blurred. Hearts danced in the edges of his visions, and his shoulders ached. His whole body ached, actually... He felt so cold. He didn't completely know where he was. He was at home... he remembered being in their shared room, stressing out over... something... there was magic paper involved... Maybe he should cut down on the magic paper.

Looking down, his vision blurred slightly. Blurs of purple filled the edges of his vision. Purple... rubbing his eyes, he groaned. The spots in his vision didn't want to go away. Blinking slowly, he groaned again, rubbing his eyes aggressively. Maybe he could really cut down on the magic paper.

His fingers twitched, his fingers laying gently against her bare skin. Purple blur... something warm in his arms... Ame? ... huh. Burying his face in her shoulder, he grumbled. Definitely cut out the magic paper, Angel.

They both had to get up... soonish. In order to board the train and visit... his father and his new daughter. That was right... fuck.

Reaching over, his fingers tapped against the screen of his phone, he groaned. It was 4am. Still, a decent amount of time before they'd have to go out, but... he didn't know if he wanted to keep going. Of course, he promised that he would go. He'd be an asshole if he didn't, and even he had standards.

His hair curled against the pillow, mumbling softly. Closing his eyes gently, he whined softly. Everything hurt. Everything ached. He loved her, he loved her, he looooooved her so much it felt unbearable. His fingers twitched again, pulling Ame's sleeping form closer to his chest. He owed her so many apologies.

...

When he opened his eyes again, it was a little later in the morning... 10am. And, he was feeling... a little better. But, still... he wasn't feeling 100 percent.

Angel groaned as he sat up in the bed, running his hand through his hair with a yawn. Ame had run off into the bathroom to take a shower and get changed. The sound of the shower running trickled softly against his ears, it sounded nice. His eyes fluttered in unison in response to the sound, he really could fall asleep just listening to it...

"Angel?"

Feeling a hand gently against his shoulder, Angel groaned. His body slumped back in response, sinking into the soft mattress. Ame paused, sighing as she leaned over. Placing her hands on his arms, Ame attempted to pull him up from the bed. However, Ame was not that strong.

"Angel, you have to get ready."

"Five more minutes..."

"I've been trying to get you up for the past five minutes!"

He felt a little bad... but, not really. It was kind of entertaining, watching her work for it. But alas... he did have to get dressed so they could travel.

Groaning, Angel sat up, rubbing his hand through his hair. Gently, reaching over, his hands cupped around Ame's face. Her face felt so soft and warm in his hands...

"Fine. I'm gonna go... take a shoooower."

And hopefully not fall over and split his head open in the process. But, if he did... he wouldn't have to visit his father. But, he wouldn't be able to stream either, so they wouldn't be making any money either... damn.

Struggling to get off the bed, Angel stumbled slightly. The high had almost completely worn off by now, but he still felt a littttle tipped off. Pushing the door to the bathroom open, he grumbled, yawning again. His fingers ran along the cold metallic lever for the shower, lightly pushing it to the side. The shower started up with an almost hypnotic whirl, the falling water sounding like heaven to his ears. He reached out, feeling the water against his hands. It felt nice and warm, perfect for a nice morning shower.

...

The shower was definitely nice... and well-needed. Running through his hair with a towel, Angel hummed. Leaning over his dresser, he rummaged through his clothes, his eyes falling on a light blue short-sleeved button-up shirt and a dull blue pair of high-waisted pants. This... this would be a cute but simple outfit. Opening another drawer, he fished out a soft white, high-collar with a nice black bow, and a pair of clip-on suspenders, as well as a nice pair of white socks. Then, tapping his fingers on his lips, he hummed. Accessories... running his fingers lightly along the jewelry lazy Susan. His eyes fell on a pair of cloud-shaped sunglasses and a silver wristwatch. Those... those would look nice with everything...

Humming as he buttoned up his shirt, smoothing down the crinkles. Stretching with a yawn, Angel grumbled. Okay... it was now or never. He just needs to get through the day and he'll be fine... probably. Ame stood at the doorway, holding a small purse in her arms, as well as a rolled-up map.

...

The last time they rode a train together like this was the night they met one another for the very first time. Leaning back as he settled down in his seat, he tilted his head slightly. The train felt rather empty for a train going to a popular, well-known city. A city that homed some of the most powerful sorcerers in the entire world. Not that he was complaining... he loved the fact he and Ame were able to snag a seat, especially for a train ride as long as this one.

You probably wonder what I meant by that. Home of the world's most powerful sorcerers... Well, this train is headed to the heart of Tokyo, and we lived in a dead town 2 and a half hours away from it. I grew up here, actually. Glancing out of the window, Angel frowned. He hadn't come back to Tokyo in years... he couldn't afford to live there on his own, of course. And the curses that lived in the city made it dangerous for a normal person like him. Especially when every curse in that stupid city wanted him dead. But, he left. He left and he never looked back.

Until today, that was. Pulling out a small, hand-held tablet, Angel sat up. It was just a small tablet he used for stream planning, but, he figured it would make a good companion on the go. Doodling on the notes app for that one stream he did a few nights back turned out to be more fun than he initially thought. Leaning to the side, Angel pondered. Drawing... he wondered what there was he could draw. His eyes wandered slightly to the girl sitting next to him, so intently trained on the book she had brought for the long trip. She looked so pretty sitting there... so nerdy and blissfully unaware.

She had tried on a different outfit today, one different from her usual white t-shirt and purple coat and pants. Her hair was pulled into a low ponytail, and the purple sweater vest she wore on top of a white collared shirt looked so pretty on her, he swore it was glistening in the passing sunlight. And the dark pants she wore, matched it very well. Purple had always been such a pretty color on her...

... he doesn't quite know where the time went. He hadn't been doodling her that long, he believed. Maybe just for a few minutes... but there they were, at the end of their line.

"Ame, we're here."

It took a moment of tapping and leading her off the train, but, they were off, and deep in the heart of Tokyo city... he despised no place more. Pulling out his phone, he looked up the address from the messages between him and this girl. Her name was Myriad. Interesting name, he thought to himself.

It was a decent walk from the train station, fifteen minutes or so... he nodded affirmatively. It was a simple and straightforward route with a few twists and a few turns the closer they got, but... he could do it. (Maybe he could feign getting lost on the way, but, Ame might call him out for it. Maybe it'd be for the best he didn't dillydally.)

"So, your dad lives here? It's a nice little neighborhood."

"Apparently."

Glancing around, he felt... nervous. He felt like he was going to be sick. Did this really have to be a canon event? Really? Seriously? There were several kids in the neighborhood, playing on their lawns, teenagers doing dances in the streets, grownups playing basketball on the court...

Slowly, they came to a stop in front of a well-maintained rather large two-story house. There were decorations on the lawn, a nice set of flora all over the lawn, a cute stepping stone path... a wooden porch, a wooden rocking chair... and an older, white-haired blue-eyed man sitting in it.

"... Oh. Apparently, he really does live here."

"... he really does look like you. Like... to a t."

Ame looked back and forth between Angel and the man in the chair. They both had the same white hair and blue eyes, fair skin... they were even both wearing sunglasses. It was uncanny for a son who hadn't seen his father in nearly 6 years.

"Angel! You're actually here!"

The voice was unfamiliar to his ears... and so was the face. A young girl skipped out of the open front door, holding an ice cream cone in her hand. The girl was short, with long brownish-red hair, and pinkish eyes, wearing a nice yellow sundress and a beige sunhat.

"You're... Myriad, right? And... dad. Uh... hi?"

"... is Angel what you go by now?"

"Uh, yeah. It is."

Skipping down the stairs, Myriad nodded with a smile. She giggled, holding out her hand towards Angel. Angel paused, then, taking her hand, he smiled back.

"I'm Myriad! It's nice to meet you."

"... Yeah. Likewise."

...

He never grew up with siblings... or a present parent for that matter. And he didn't have friends either... sometimes it was painful to remember that fact. But... not as painful as the fact his father somehow burnt their dinner, and they had to go out to a sushi restaurant instead.

"Seriously, how do you burn water, Dad?"

"Hey hey. Not too much on me."

Reaching over, Angel picked up a piece of sushi from the conveyor belt, gently pinching it between his chopsticks, an unimpressed expression on his face. Taking the sushi, he turned slightly towards Ame, holding it out towards her.

"This one is a California roll. Not sure why they call it that."

"Was it made in California?"

Laughter erupted from his throat, and his hands shook, nearly dropping the sushi roll. He couldn't help himself. There was something so sweet and endearing about her, even as she asked stupid questions. There's something so... intoxicating about her. He couldn't exactly put his fingers on what it was, however.

---

They always say that love is blind. When you love someone, you don't see their faults. You're lost in the clouds high above any reach of common sense, a high so powerful it is unmatched by any drug. True, unadulterated bliss.

His fingers were shaking a little bit as he held a small bouquet of sunflowers in his hands, wrapped in a pretty glistening blue bow. She had worked so many miracles in his life, brought him back to a place he never thought he could, she'd helped him grow more as a person than he ever could alone.

Sunflowers always face towards the sun, bright and warm. They were a pretty flower, simple and pure. And, they were Ame's favorite flower. He didn't know how to take care of sunflowers. He spent a lot of time googling it, looking it up, he even asked the woman from the flower shop how to care for them.

When they were successful and rich, Angel wanted to buy a decent-sized house with a beautiful front lawn. He wanted to line that lawn with sunflowers and watch them grow. He wanted to put up little picket fences and create a stone walkway. Ame loved the look of it in all those magazines she strung up on her office wall... And he loved how angelic she looked when she was happy.

But, this would have to do for now... sunflowers are still sunflowers, right?

Stepping through the door to their apartment, Angel looked around. The apartment was littered with the wrappings of the many gifts he had bought for her over the months they had been streaming together. Small gifts, like a new mini bookshelf for her books, or a puzzle she had been eyeing... chocolates, sweets, foods... anything she wanted she got and more.

His feet clicked against the floor, a soft thud as he traveled through the small apartment, stopping in front of the bedroom door. Hesitating in front of the door, Angel listened quietly, before raising his hand and knocking gently on the door.

"Ame? Can I come in?"

There was a moment of silence for a long while, and quietly, Angel pushed down on the doorknob. He carefully pushed the door open with his arm, sticking his head inside the room. His eyes scanned the room before eventually falling on the sleeping figure in the bed. Well... that explains why she didn't answer the door.

Taking a step into the room, Angel paused. His eyes fell on the sunflowers on his arms. Then, chuckling, he made his way over to the bedside drawer, placing the flowers on the dresser's surface. She could have them as a surprise when she woke up.

His fingers twitched as he reached over, gently brushing against her bangs as he leaned over. She really was so pretty, no matter what she was doing... planting a kiss against her forehead, he smiled softly.

"I love you."

Ground control to psychoeletric angel, do you copy?

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ENDING ? - GROUND CONTROL TO PSYCHOELECTRIC ANGEL ♥︎

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