#[ my sister said she was gonna yell WHAT'S UP KREES when he appeared ]

[trashpandaorigins]

The Body Keeps the Score Chapter 4: Chances

"You said it yourself bitch, we're the Guardians of the Galaxy." Gamora is finally a part of something. But the past always follows you, eats at you and she must come to grips with her deeds as she tries to build a future. Meanwhile Rocket has never cared much for anyone or anything. Together the two of them discover they are more alike than different and try to heal themselves by befriending the other.

*Content Warnings: Mentions of child/animal abuse, trauma, character death, physical torture/pain*

It's a good ol' bedtime story, give you nightmares 'til you die

And the ones that love to tell it, hide the mischief in their eyes

Condemn their sons to Hades

And Gehenna is full of guys, alive and well

But there ain't no hell for a firewatcher's daughter

Stranger at My Door - Brandi Carlisle

Gamora drummed her fingers against the worn controls of the Benatar.  The distant rumble of the engine and the music competed for dominance throughout the ship. Only to be drowned out by Peter and Drax’s yelling. The assassin tuned it all out as she scrutinized the screen in front of her. A holographic depiction of the ship, making its way through the tenth quadrant. 

We’re only going forty seven teks? She rubbed her fingers over her eyes, leaning against the controls.  If Nebula is on Kilvore she’s probably talking to the Kree. Or the Skrulls. Which is worse?  She tried to remember the last time she’d faced off against a Skrull.

“Hello Peter,” the woman heard his heavy footfalls long before he appeared on the deck.

“Figured you’d be up here,” he smiled warmly in that unsettling way that made her want to smile back, despite the anxiety roiling in her stomach.

“We need to be on Kilvore today,” she turned back to the controls before her grin could betray her. “Every second Nebula is out there she’s talking to people, or making her way back to Thanos. She could be amassing an army right now. We should be at the jump point already. If we don’t…”

“Hey, hey, easy. She’s not gonna go straight to Thanos.”

“And what makes you so sure of that.”

Peter’s grin only widened, opening his arms, trying to be casual about reaching out to her. She watched him keenly and sidestepped, looking out at the passing stars. “She would’ve gone to Thanos the second she found out you betrayed him. She could’ve gone to him right after the Kyln but she didn’t. You know Nebula better than anyone. If she wanted to drag you to Thanos she would’ve, if she wanted to kill you, she would’ve.”

Gamora shifted her weight, straightening as he came up behind her.

“We have to get to Kilvore as soon as possible,” she finished, crossing her arms and turning away from him, down the hall back to her own bunk. The sounds of Pat Benatar herself followed her down the metal corridors. The light click of her boots echoed, click, click click….

Eleventh Quadrant,  Planet Unknown - Seven Months Earlier

Click, click, click,

“Ghhh, hhhh, hhh,”

“Hush, you know he doesn’t like it when you scream.” Gamora’s hands trembled reaching out to touch the bare cybernetics of her sister’s head. Wires stuck out at odd angles. Occasionally sparking.

Nebula snarled, shrinking backward and letting loose another cry of pain from the suspension wires that tugged at her tender skin.

“Don’t touch me!”

Gamora’s hands fell, eyes scanning for any sign of their father, or Maw or any of the others.

“You need to be quiet. If you scream he’ll only hurt you more.”

Nebula’s dark eyes narrowed,

“The...the..o.. only one,” she winced at another spasm. “Who... who’s hurting me is you.”

Click, click click,

“He’s coming back.” Gamora backed away, watching her sister’s face, riddled with inscrutable fury, the truth of it dawned on her with spine chilling certainty.

She’s going to kill me one day.

---

Gamora marched down the hall, head down, trying to think over the music sounding throughout the ship.  

“Gamora!”

She stopped short, slamming into something hard and instantly reached for the knife at her hip, swinging the small blade upward with a true aim.

“Drax! Don’t sneak up on me like that!”

The large tattooed man frowned, arms folded across his chest.

“Have you seen small Groot?”

Gamora slid her knife back into its sheath, stomach dropping to her feat.

“You lost him?!”

“Oh no,” Drax waved a dismissive hand, “we are playing a game. I have place small Groot beside the go gear and I am going to hide amid the ship. He will wait and then come and find me.”

“Drax, how is he going to find you if he cannot leave his pot?”

His face morphed from amusement to realization.

“I will return,” the Destroyer promised, turning on his feet back down the hall. At least someone was adjusting to communal life quite well. Drax had been in the highest of spirits since they left Xandar, fawning over Groot and offering to cook meals for them. They weren’t bad, some of the best etriet she had ever had. She watched him take off back to their game but split off to her own quarters.  The door shut with a quiet thud, only the slightest traces of music could be heard whispering through the walls, trying to get in.

Gamora stretched her arms outward, to the left, then the right the tight pull of her skin still resisted some of the metal in her shoulders and elbows but she breathed through it, trying not to remember the face of the man who put them there. She bent down, touching her fingers to her toes the taunt tendons on the back of her knees straining tight. Breathed, in then out, then out against the uncomfortable feeling.

After the stretching she lifted her weights timing her thoughts to each lift.

If she tells Thanos I betrayed him...he will send the others after me. No. He wouldn’t waste the resources. He’d send Maw or Proxima.  She set the weights down, the ache in her body relaxing momentarily before she lifted again. No...he enjoys mind games...toying with us. He’d make Nebula track me down herself.

She sucked a breath through her teeth, sweat beginning to coat her chest.

Was that better or worse. Maybe Peter was right?

Gamora set the large barbell down and lay down against the bench, pressing the large weights with her legs. That’s it...just push it away ...push it all away. But Nebula’s face continued to linger in her mind, those black eyes. The hatred. Gamora pressed against the bench, pushing against the own strength. Testing herself, constantly testing herself.  Just a bit farther, the cybernetics in her legs twinged, irritating her skin as she strained. Just push a little more. It a bit more and I can win...I can win again ...just a little farther…

“Fuck!” A searing stab electrocuted through her right leg. The clang of the press snapping back in to place hammered against her head. Damn that socket, it had always been slightly off, the cybernetic bolt in her right leg. But telling him it hurt would’ve made it worse. That would’ve meant another procedure and it was better to grin and bear it. She could take it.

Gamora slowly worked the skin on her knee rubbing out the kinks slowly and methodically with her rough hands. Peter’s hands were soft, when he held them on Knowhere. She imagined those large hands messaging her skin, he’d probably be gentle and make some sort of lame joke. She thought of him fondly through the burning in her her leg.

Stop it Gamora, she chided herself as she stood up and tested her weight. Her fingers pressed against the wall, leaning against it for support. The metal in her twinged; she bit her lip, forcing her leg outward, the pull of the muscle oddly comforting. Just breathe. She straightened, hissing through the burning pain and swallowed, tossing her hair over her shoulder. In, out. One more time.

Good, she realized looking down the corridor; no one was there. Another song revved up throughout the ship. She made her way to the cock-pit, glancing around for any sign of Drax or Peter or Rocket. They can’t know. They’ll try to stop me if I tell them. Rocket’s untethered temper flashed through her mind. She waved the thought away with an irritated huff, climbing up the steps to the main bridge.

“Groot?”

The little sapling looked up at her with innocent glee, two tiny little arms bolstering himself up as he was attempting to drag himself across the hall, trailing dirt out of the little round container. She dropped to her knees, expertly ignoring the pain and looked over the black dirt, tumbling aside to reveal the root-flare but strong. Some roots poked through, small but strong.

“You shouldn’t be out of your pot!”  

The little creature just blinked happily large eyes staring up at her with impeccable admiration. A look at the old Groot would never give her, as kind as he was.

“Where’s Rocket?” He should be keeping an eye on him. Letting him out of his pot so young. “Hold still,” she packed the dirt once more against the sapling. The soil has to hold everything in place...but not too tight so the roots can’t grow? Too much? She wondered skeptically, moving the clumps around with her fingers.

“MMMmmm ggg!” Groot fussed, trying to swipe at her with nimble little hands.

Gamora ignored his attempts, hoisting the flora on her hip and going to the cockpit. She set him down in nav seat, strapping him in.

“Hang on,” she instructed, sitting herself down in the pilot's chair, flipping off the auto-pilot control.

You’re not taking this from me Nebula. Not this.

Gamora curled her grip around the pad of the steering console. Breathe, in...out. Hold it. Go. She pushed the gears forward, suring into hyper-speed to the jump point for Kilvore.

I’ve never lost a fight with her before. Beside her Groot shrieked with glee. She glanced at his smile out of her periphery. I’m not losing this one.

[sxcheon-archived]

jeonephram replied to your post:

[[ KRISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

yas he was so good in the movie. love it, love his role, simply amazing.