#[ and it's the first time that i've had a muse where i'm so invested in a ship and i analyze it so very much-- ]

[blackbat05]

Simple Moments

Jason Todd x Reader

A/N: First piece of 2022! A short Jason Todd fic that can also be read with my other Jason Todd fic, <Pillar>. It can also be read alone! As always, thanks for the support and I wish y'all the best for the new year!

Genre: PG-13

Warnings/Notes: Jason is the best boyfriend. I really think behind that aggressive facade, he is the most understanding!

***

'You're more violent than usual.'

'Haha. Very funny Bats.' You finished tying up the unconscious perpetrator against the tree next to the police station.

'You're lucky I didn't catch you.' The hulking figure keeps up with you, clearly not appreciating the nickname you gave him.

'And what? Report me to the police? If anything I'm helping Gordon and GCPD do their work. They should be thankful.' You scoffed, taking the next alley to get to the main street.

'Damn criminals don't even take a break during the New Year.' Removing your mask, you stuffed it in the satchel that you picked up behind the dumpster. 'I would appreciate it if they could keep it in their pants you know? I was so looking forward to catching that Korean drama I've been talking about.'

Jason muses, 'The special forces soldier that drives a deluxe taxi to catch bad guys?'

'That's the one.' You see him raising an eyebrow. 'What? The plot has me very invested!'

'Your boyfriend literally does the same thing!' He waves his muscly arms, much to your amusement. 'Minus the cool taxi of course.'

Patting his arm gently to appease his jealously, you linked your arms together, entering the bustling street.

You appreciated moments like these. Talking about the most mundane things. Although you had to give him a death glare when he burst out laughing at your recount of begging your professor to extend the submission dateline all because of the previous night where you were occupied with chasing down condiment man.

'I get why Bruce why avoids him on purpose now,' you muttered. 'I can still smell the mustard sauce in my hair! I hate mustard!'

Jason chuckles, gently pulling you towards him a delivery man on a bicycle apologizes for the inconvenience, speeding away to his destination.

Yeah, you loved these simple moments.

'What about your family? Aren't you going to visit them for the New Year?'

'We're arranging it. I wouldn't want to put my dad on a twenty-hour-long flight. He's a pretty big man after all.'

Jason nods, telling you to let him know if you needed any help. He can't help but notice your bruised knuckles, a confirmation that you went harder than you should have. 'And did you get them out?'

Dang, why was he so observant?

'More or less.' You shrug, the topic of your sister had posed a challenge for you to form any more words. 'Hey, you want to get some takeout? My treat.'

He wasn't the adopted son of Bruce Wayne for nothing. Jason knew you had no intention of broaching such a sensitive subject every time, especially during the New Year. So he had learned to wait until you were ready.

'Dumplings?' He asks.

'Hell yeah. But you're not choosing the sauce. The last time you did my ass was on fire.'

Jason laughs at your descriptive objection. 'Not even if I watch the drama with you?'

You pause at the sliding door to the shopping mall. Curse his master negotiating skills. 'Come on baby,' you plead. 'I really don't want to spend another two hours in the toilet!'

'Nope!' He skillfully dodges your grasp, brisk walking into the mall.

'I'll get you pancakes for dessert!' You yell, running after him, passing the huge banner hung at the entrance of the food court.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

***

A/N: Thanks for reading! Likes comments and reblogs are always appreciated!

[the-ziero-experience]

What is the muse that you write for the longest? | What caused you to start writing? What was your key point? | How do you create an OC? What are your steps for developing an OC?

What is the muse that you write for the longest? What caused you to start writing? What was your key point?

This is a tough one because I haven't really had that many long-term OCs. The next question kinda goes hand-in-hand with this one, so I'll answer both at the same time!

So, I've been writing/RPing for about 12-15 years now, somewhere in that ballpark. I started with LARPing with some friends as a very young crotch-goblin and it slowly progressed into writing when the friends I had IRL started to become not friends. I've been on & off actively roleplaying/writing for years, mostly due to depression episodes coming left n right and doing the fun Depression thing where you lose interest in everything, paired with some imposter syndrome. All that fun stuff!

But because of all this, I haven't really had long-term OCs, they typically get trashed and replaced whenever I get back in the swing of it. As of right now though! I will say that Yrys & Alys are by far my most invested and thought-out characters!

For how long exactly, I'd put Yrys at abouuuutttt.... 6-Ish Months? And Alys is much, much more recent with a little less than a month of being created.

How do you create an OC? What are your steps for developing an OC?

This depends. Typically most of my characters come from things that I am heavily invested in or have a huge amount of interest in, then warping that interest into something more personalized.

Let's take a fast n brief deep-dive into Yrys to explain my thought process!

So I first started with the aesthetic. I love gothic-witchy aesthetics the most, and I've never had a character with that before. So that was the first thing I did for Yrys. Next was gender identity. I personally love playing with the concept of Gender. IRL I'm non-binary, so I made Yrys non-binary to live the dream that I wouldn't be able to achieve IRL.

So with those base ideas down, I start to flesh it all out more to make it all specific to him.

So, background... Well, I've done all the "Normal" sort of characters and the post 6.0 story is fantastic so I took inspo from that and made Yrys into a voidsent. Then I just smooth everything out! Over weeks n' weeks of going back n' forth. LOL

Thank you for the ask!! ♥♥

[solarsavoy]

16, 17 and 18 for the asks plss! :3

Ask links on pinned post.

Thank you for asking, Bismuth! ^^

16) Do you have a method for getting characters to sound/feel in character?

Nothing in particular. It helps if I reread some previous stuff in that same POV, but in the case that I don't have that yet, I just wait for the muse to hit me with something. I know that might not sound all too amazing or anything. All I can say is that when I write, it's like my mind transports over to their mind and I start seeing the story unfold through their eyes. I notice things they'd notice, even if I wouldn't have paid enough attention in my own shoes. In the case of Gakushuu with Magic Shuu, he has a much higher vocabulary than me and I'll often, very often, get to a point where I know there's a better word for something, but I don't myself know what it is, so I have to research it. Searching for synonyms is the most common thing I do when writing Magic Shuu. I wish I had some better, easier to practice and apply answer, but I don't. Just when I'm them, I write, and if I can't "tune into them", I can't.

Also, it has happened a lot with Nagisa and Karma initially that I accidentally tune into Deshi or Stag respectively. Usually I'm able to catch it, but it's another one of the many reasons that I worry if I've portrayed the character correctly. What I'm really asking is "I didn't accidentally tune into Deshi instead of Nagisa, did I?"

17) Do you have any wips that you can tell us about? What are you most excited for in you wip?

There's two actually, and I'm excited for them because they relate to my original story Krystar. First, there's a crossover between Krystar and Angel Beats meant to take place between the Fragment series and the Echo series. Then, there's another crossover between Krystar and Noragami, set to take place during my final book (number 12) which takes place after book 5 of the Echo series (book 11 overall). Let's just say it ties the stories together quite nicely and only active readers of both my original story and fanfiction will be able to appreciate the connections. There's technically a call out in the Krystar/Noragami story in the final book Reign of Mynt, but I have a "variable" that explains it away without anyone being the wiser. Except my fanfic readers. 😏

18) What's the most obscure thing you've researched for a fic?

That's a really hard one. I've done a lot of research on a lot of strange things, but I can't remember the obscure ones, so instead, here are all the strange ones I remember.

Students of Despair: exactly how long it takes for a body to decompose as well as how to obscure the time of death.

Krystar: how long it takes for a pool of blood to dry given certain conditions, and what happens while it does.

Krystar: how jeans were made. This is why they don't exist on Thera. Jeans were made because some dude got sick of his pants tearing so quickly and easily because buying more clothes at the time was inconvenient and you could only mend the same spots over and over again so many times. Like the potato chip (except thicker instead of thinner), it was actually an act of defiance to use double or triple the amount of fabric than normal and they ended up being sturdier that way. That's why they were originally the "worker's pants" and a lot of laborers still wear them now. (Ex: carpenters, mechanics, construction workers, etc.)

Kristmas Karma: the weather and how common/uncommon it is to snow in Japan. You'd be surprised at how little you know about another place's weather until you check.

Life in Retail: shelf life of sushi. It's 2-3 days by the way. And yes, I didn't know, because like a lot of people where I'm from, more than 6 hours is questionable. 🤔

Phoenix: how hard it is to DIY a wig/doll hair out of real hair. And it's hard. Major props to Akari. 👏

Misfortune: how long it takes for the money to grow in an investment and how the government would be able to cease control of it if the person died. I just needed to make sure it was possible.

And that's all I can think of for now. 😊 Thanks again for the ask! Have a great day everyone!

[thatonecitykid]

I bet on Losing

Hey everyone! Sorry this is so sad.. was already crying so might as well make everyone else cry.This takes place after Endgame but during the same time as Far From Home. Listen to "I Bet on Losing Dogs" by Mitski for the full experience. Word Count: 2517. Have fun angels :)

Peter had finally left for his class trip, Pepper and Morgan had gone to spend their summer in Malibu, the remaining avengers were either in space or had completely disappeared from your life. Here you were after five years of your life had evaporated, and after all this time you had to play your fathers role for all the remaining avengers. You hadn't had the opportunity to cry when you first learned about what had happened. You couldn't cry at the funeral, not because you did not want to, but because you felt as if your father wouldn't want to see it. No one wanted to leave you alone, but after months of trying to dig some type of emotion out of you they had assumed that the death and slow disappearance of your makeshift avenger family had unaffected you.

You finally had the opportunity to exist alone. You had also finally mustered up the strength to visit secluded cabin your father had lived in for the last five years of his life. Although you had been given the keys immediately after the funeral, something about visiting the area made you feel uneasy. Not necessarily creeped out but just as if you did not belong, after all it was something your father invested in after you had already blipped away for several months.

You drove up to the cabin alone, slowly unlocking the door as if to not start or whoever may be inside. Before even entering the cabin, it looks clean, you assume that Pepper has had people cleaning constantly to maintain the cabin. It made sense, it was something she's cherished. You stepped into the cabin slowly and began to look around. The walls were lined with framed pictures of Morgan, family pictures of Pepper, your dad, and Morgan, and random posters and vintage albums. Although you were not the one to complain about it, having no evidence of your existence in the main areas of the home caused your heart dropped. As you wandered through the kitchen and the main family room, there is no evidence of Tony's life prior to the blip, just a somewhat normal family of three.

You decide to wander to the basement area, leaving the office and bedroom spaces upstairs for later. There was a large sitting area that you assumed they watched movies in. There was also a playroom painted pink featuring all sorts of gadgets very similar to those you grew up with that Tony had made for you. Towards the back hall of the basement, it was a glass door to your father's workshop area. You open the door gently and made your way in.

Despite looking like somewhat of a mess, you knew that behind the madness there was a method. You could tell that although your dad left in a hurry, things were placed in specific spots very similarly to how he did in every other one of his workshops. You walked towards his swiveling chair, noticing a metal box with a button on the worktable. You press the button and jump back as a life-size hologram of your father appeared in the room. He began

"Hi Pepper. My love, my muse, my boss. If you are listening to this then I did the one thing you have always told me not to do. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for all the worry I've put you through, and I am sorry for taking myself away from you. I was a gift wasn't I. You've already seen another version of this message, but it never hurts to see your face again my darling."

The tears in your eyes begin to form, not because you had not expected to see your father. At this point you had already seen the message he had left after the funeral; It was only really meant for Pepper and Morgan, never addressing you.. At the funeral you refused to enter the cabin but as you watched the message while standing outside, Happy looked over at you with remorse but you kept a straight face again. Who were you to complain at your dead dad's funeral? Yet this message radiated the same energy.

As the second portion of the message began to play tears began to fall faster. It almost feels like an out of body, sure your dad had taken up different kids during your time growing up, but this message made you feel as If you had been completely replaced. Although it felt like a dumb theory there was no evidence as to your existence prior to Morgan.

"Hello my little scientist. How's my favorite person. Daddy is really sorry I can't be there right now. Be a trooper and hug you mom for me real quick. Now you must be surprised because I'm supposed to be the strongest dad in the world but let me tell you kid, sometimes crazy things happen when put on the ironman helmet. My little minion I love you 3000. My love for you is infinite. You have been and will forever be daddy's best friend."

Here you were crying over a child who had also lost her father, filled with jealousy over the fact that you father had chosen her and failed to consider your return but had prepared for Peter's return, still had projects waiting for Harley, and had in fact set up a stable plan for Morgan's future. At this point you were sobbing, what had all felt like a bad nightmare and jumping to conclusions had started to feel way too real. This emotion was even stronger than when you watched footage from your father suit as the snap happened, this emotion felt like a stab in the back.

Maybe he never loved me.

You tried to collect yourself but were still sobbing when the holographic figure of you father disappeared. You might as well finish the house tour before leaving. The upstairs portion of the house featured Tony and Pepper's room, Morgan's room and two other doors. The main bedroom was tidy and organized, with a closet full of clothes that both Pepper and your dad had left. You walked into Morgan's room and did a quick look around, not wanting to invade child space. Returning to the hallway you opened the door to your father's office. Inside there was a rather simple with a desk, a leather chair, and two matching chairs. The plants in the room were growing well, meaning someone still came to water them. There were a few pictures on the wall, including Peter's Stark internship picture, and a random picture you took of the original Avengers after their first New York battle. On the desk there was another metal box similar to that in the workpace. You argued whether or not you wanted to potentially break your heart more before giving in, siting in the leather seat and pressing the button.

A slim beam of light scanned over your face, confirming your identity, and the box began to play. To say you were shocked is an understatement, as your father's hologram appeared across the desk sitting in one of the matching chairs.

"Hello Munchkin. If you've found this box, then I just going to have to accept that I've failed you. You've been gone for five years and regret every moment leading up to when you snapped away. You really did want to come to space with me, and honestly you would have been helpful, but I don't think I could see you Blip away and have the will to continue. That being said because I am already admitting I was wrong, I should not have had your suit take you to the bunker room, where you eventually snapped away alone. I regret that decision y constantly. On another note, I'm sorry I didn't hug you as soon as you got back, I clearly I cannot really hug anyone."

You had finally given up on holding in their tears. You didn't have to be strong in front of your dad. He had always held you when you cried and this time he couldn't. You tried to wrap your arms around yourself, but nothing felt the same.

"I hope you are crying, because if I'm crying alone during this part, I'll be embarrassed, his image continued as it stood up and leaned against the back of the chair. Munch I know you've probably walked around this house and have found no evidence of yourself. You've probably beat yourself up about how much I love Morgan, but think about it. The amount of time I've spent these last 5 years essentially idolizing you would not have been good for her to experience. "

You rose quickly from the chair. Not even one damn picture?

"Now I know you're wondering not even a single picture. Pick up the projector box and follow me ."

You did as the digital version of your father told you and followed it back into the hallway.

"Put the box down and put your hand on the center of the door. "

This activated a scanner which opened up the door to the room. As you walked in you recognized that this was an exact replica of your room back in the Malibu house. You were still a kid when the original house was blown to pieces but somehow everything was exactly as you remembered it. As you walked further into the room you noticed the large screens, placed like picture frames, which played videos and pictures of you and your dad throughout the years.

Your father walked towards the center of the room, bounded by how far the projector was.

"You see kid, me and you have somewhat the same grieving styles. I have a feeling you didn't cry at the funeral. I have a feeling you haven't cried, at least in a way that someone else could have noticed. You take after me in that sense."

The hologram started to sniffle, your dad had actually started crying when recording this. You really wanted to hug him, the reality of his death hurt even more. You had finally allowed yourself to start grieving.

"Look, I know you used to listen to the song about betting on losing dogs when you wanted to cry, but that does not apply to you at all. You may have gotten a more complicated stick of life, but I can tell ya, this does not need to be your villain origin story. From the first day I took you home I could tell you were a fighter, but I need you to feel as if its ok to cry. I've spent hours on this floor in shambles wishing you were here. The small things that Morgan does that remind me of you throw me into sadness pools constantly. You are my motivating force. I really hope you allow yourself to cry about it so that you can continue in life. I don't think I can stand in this room for any longer before I cannot speak at all, so please take the projector back to my office. "

As you lifted the projector you thought about how much this must have hurt your father to record. Maybe he didn't want anyone to encounter this box except for you. As you placed the box on the desk, you sat back into the leather chair as your father's holograph sat across from you.

"On a different note, you are probably wondering why I seemed to set up a game plan for everyone but you. With Morgan I just made sure she had a comfortable, who am I kidding, lavish funding behind her. I can't dictate what a five-year-old should do. For Harley you know that I've always looked out for him, a position in Stark industries honestly should not have surprised you. Peter is what I feel most conflicted about. I'm not setting him up to become the next Ironman, I'm setting him up to become the greatest version of Spiderman he can be. Well, I know the media is probably going to take it and run having known that Spiderman and Ironman we're friends at some point, but I'm really giving you the biggest responsibility. I don't expect you to live in my shadow, I want you to outgrow it. I think you might be surprised to see everything that I left you, besides Stark industries itself. That's a conversation for another day."

"I know I've been speaking for quite a while, but my baby, my baby yes I called you that. I know how much this has all affected you, and I'm sorry, I am completely sorry and do take full fault for it all. But now because we cannot change the past, let's focus on the present. I want you to know that I loved you with my entire being. I'm not sure how to emphasize this enough but I do want you to know you were cared for, you were loved, and you were thought about for every minute. If you don't get to see this message, and I'm already gone, that means this message will never have to play for anyone. Either I found you and I've given you a new message, or I'm rolling in my grave. Either way my darling I cannot emphasize how much I love you. I do hope for the best for. Before I have to go, I want to see you smile. Sure, I can't physically see it right now, but I can imagine it."

As the recording choked out that last sentence, you flashed a weak smile. A face sticky with all the tears that you have been crying.

Now I know you need to get back home, but when you get back to the city, stop by the shawarma place and get something to eat. you gotta eat Darling. Also don't act like you don't like Peter, you two idiots keep pushing each other away in cannot take it. Now I'm gonna say goodbye mini me. Watch over Pepper and Morgan for me, okay? I love you."

You took one final sweep of the house before heading back to your car. You had cried so much that your eyes physical hurt. You almost felt a sense of comfort having finally released some of the pent-up emotion. As you drove towards the city and towards the Shawarma place you almost felt kind of sad, knowing that all of your friends were in a foreign country. Yet you still felt as if your best friend, your Dad was watching over you. And in all reality that felt as if it was the only thing that mattered.

[boop-le-snoot]

PARTY FAVOURS I CHAPTER 13

first time readers click here 💖

TWs/Summary: In this house, we ship Reader/Tony's Rolls-Royce. Reader and Tony being dorks on a date. That's it that's the chapter. Lots of sass and Tony being Tony.

A question for my readers: Are you still invested? How's the slow burn? Is everything realistic? 👉🏻👈🏻🥺

As usual, my beta is @miscmarvelwritings . I love her.

"Nice digs, Cupcake."

"Nice ride, Tin Man."

The sass fell from my lips, warm and familiar, paving the way for our upcoming debut like the old, soft living room rug. Any awkwardness I had expected there to be left the moment I saw Tony pull up to my front gate in his Royce: the man was just that extra. The size of my estate, the five-figure outfit of mine - it paled in comparison to his own clout. 

In a world where my choices were usually distributed between stuck-up rich boys or insecure middle-class men, Tony was a fresh drink of water with his absolute indifference towards my and his own net worth.

I wasn't afraid to admire said ride, either. Being a huge petrolhead was what got me interested in engineering, physics and computer sciences in the first place. The desire for speed grew into thirst for knowledge: how to get more horsepower, how to tune, how to mod. No mechanic took an eighteen year old rich-girl seriously even when I had all the lingo right, I had to be a step ahead, at all times, if I wanted my ride to be the best. And I never settled for less than that.

"No driver?" I inquired for the reason behind the unusual behaviour. After all, a Rolls' wasn't the kind of car you drive personally. All the amenities it had, it had in the back.

"Gave Happy a day off," Tony remarked absently. I noticed the small quirk of his eyebrow, however. He was intrigued.

I decided to give it a shot. "So what, this thing packs, what, about five-fifty horses?" I mused, watching Tony nearly swerve into the opposite lane. "At two and a half tons, it's still gotta be pretty quick with that V12-turbo. How fast it go?" The satisfaction was immeasurable, as pleasant to my soul as sitting in a heated leather chair with the smell of a new car, engine quietly rumbling in front of me. And by quietly I mean, it was focus-or-you'll-miss-it kind of quiet.

"Well aren't you full of surprises, baby girl," Tony grinned; a happy, excited grin even. It made his face lose ten years of age just like that. "Zero to sixty in five and a half seconds," He said after a moment. 

"Not bad," I said, sounding impressed. I already knew that but I wasn't planning on robbing Tony out of well deserved praise for his choice in vehicles. 

"Got a ride of your own?" He asked with a smile, like he didn't know it already. No background check would have skipped my three speeding tickets, but I concur. This game was fun.

"I do, actually. It's a 2008 Range Rover. Supercharged," I added in the end, just to emphasise.

"A big car for such a little girl," Tony whistled playfully.

"I'm compensating," I deadpanned. "I'm a little slow on the uptake, y'know, so my Rangie with five hundred horses makes up for it. Gotta keep it balanced."

Tony chewed on his lip. "Five hundred? Haven't heard about that, it comes with three-ninety-five in stock," His eyebrow wiggled. "Tuned it?" He cast me a contemplative glance.

"Yup," I exclaimed happily. As far as the date, I would have been utterly ecstatic to talk about cars all evening. Screw the boring "where do you see yourself in five years" questions, talk to me about your favourite engine swaps. Concept cars, give me those. Monster trucks? Yes, please. Vintage low-riders? Couldn't wait to get my grubby little hands on one. Gimmee!

Tony kept his silence and kept his press smile starting the moment we set foot on getting out of the car. The place he'd taken me to was ridiculously upscale and fancy; the valet hesitated only for a second before catching the keys Tony so carelessly tossed in his direction. There was almost no fear in his body language when the boy approached the massive, expensive vehicle.

The hostess smiled big at Tony and gave me the world's biggest stink-eye when he looked the other way but what else is new? As soon as she left us in the privacy of our booth, I didn't hesitate to stick my tongue at her retreating back. A brief lapse in maturity, if you will.

Tony cackled, growing suddenly serious. "Did she bother you? I can get her fired. I should get her fired."

"Nah," I shrugged. "Don't really care, just wanted to showcase my amazing sense of humour." Snorting, I gave Tony a wink and a secretive grin.

"You really don't give a fuck, do you," His eyebrows twitched again, a sign of mild interest that I noted during our routine sciencing time together. Tony was incredibly expressive if one took the time to observe.

"I could suck your dick under the table right now," I answered honestly. "It's just that when God gave out things like dignity and shame, I wasn't home. Too many fun things to do, y'know," I spoke as casually as I could even though I was dying of laughter inside.

Eyes bulging, jaw hanging mid-way to the floor. Tony was serving Looks™ and I didn't mean just the white tee and purple blazer combo. "Princess, you're going to be the fucking death of me!" He took a sip from his water glass, smirking.

Finally releasing my mirth, I gathered my hands in a lock in front of me. His own, warm and calloused, reached over - I allowed the brief intimacy, clasping them, fiddling with the leather band of his watch. For a moment, it was just us, sitting in the dim light, discovering each other anew to Robert Johnson singing the blues and NYC bustling with life just behind the wall. 

The waiter took our orders - and if I totally butchered the Italian, Tony was gentleman enough not to make any remarks. 

"Somehow, every time I am with you, you both manage to meet my expectations to a T and surprise me at the same time," I wasn't able to completely ignore my nerves. My hand was still loosely in his and he didn't mind at all, me messing with his watch.

"How so?"

"I'm going to loosely quote someone, bear with me." Mr Davies's words popped into my mind just as I was wondering how to best articulate my feelings. "You're eccentric and interesting because it's, well, it's you, because it would be much weirder if we'd be sitting here and making boring small-talk and asking each other the genetic get-to-know-you questions," I briefly paused to sip my Dom Peringon and stare at our hands. Gathering my wits. "That would be why I don't do dates. It sounds so tedious on paper, just sorting through people until a person that's not absolutely mind-numbing comes around."

Tony was silent for a moment, the sheen of his eyes, the faraway look; he was lost in memories. Probably remembering all the girls he had charmed before. I didn't doubt it was easy for him: his smile was distracting and people usually were attracted to shiny things. He shone plenty. Also, most people were stupid, they never cared to look past the golden wrapper. I was convinced there was a diamond under it. But then again, I was biased.

"I've never thought about it that way, but I guess you're right," He finally said, serious. "With Pepper, at least, it was. Come to think of it, we never had that much in common, besides Stark Industries and her willingness to put up with my shit." It was painful for him to talk about her, that much was obvious. His laugh was forced and sardonic.

I, on the other hand, never understood why they got together in the first place. Or maybe I did - but the cold, composed Pepper and the chaotic, energetic Tony reminded me too much of my own parents. All four people in this fucked up equation could have been much happier if they choose... What? Being alone? That was terrifying, too.

I kept quiet, giving his hands a gentle squeeze.

"You know, this is so bizarre. Even an eighteen year old kid has got it figured out," He suddenly said, his tone bitter like the coffee that he loved.

"Woah, slow down," I put up a hand. "I never said I know what to do. I just said I know what NOT to do." The 'kid' remark would have made me eye-roll so hard my skull would crack any day. In this context, however, it was pretty spot on.

Tony snorted. "And how did you come by that information, pray tell, Baby?"

I huffed. "Have you met my parents?" We simultaneously cringed and I hurried to erase that mental image. "I make fun of myself for being into old dudes all the time," I made air quotes around the phrase that made Tony scoff, "But, honestly speaking, I've never even been on a date. Like a real one. Usually it's twenty minutes and I'm falling asleep mid-conversation. People can't seem to keep up with me or something," I felt genuinely dejected. "So many meaningless questions, so many downright idiotic comments. From men," I pointed out the obvious. "My mother used to tell me she thought I was gay because I didn't act like a girl... Whatever that means."

"That sounds pretty shitty," Tony was studying me like one would have been looking at an exotic animal in a zoo. "That said, I agree."

"That I don't act like a girl?" I teased him, the left corner of my mouth tilting upward. "Fuck that noise. I want to drive fast cars, drink straight liquor and have orgasms. If that makes me a dude... I look pretty good for a dude in a dress."

We laughed in unison, tension evaporating under the shared, mutual understanding. With Tony, it was easy. The waiter brought our selected dishes. Blink-and-he's-gone. Top notch service.

"A dude in a dress, can't say I'm surprised 'bout your lack of dates," He remarked conversationally, happily digging into his food. The noises he made were intriguing, to say the least, and I followed suit on my own food, finding it absolutely delicious. A delicious meal with a delicious man at my side. I refused to feel guilty about my thoughts.

"I guess I have exactly one (1) date on my ledger now," I raised my argument.

The fork clattered as Tony once again, came to a sudden realization. "Holy shit, you weren't kidding."

"No shit," I gave into the urge to roll my eyes. "But on the upside, my first date was with the most gorgeous, intelligent and witty bachelor of the city. I'd say I don't have it all that bad," I quirked an eyebrow at him.

"Aw, you're making me blush," Tony recovered quickly, grinning. "And don't be shy. The most desired bachelor of the country, if not the world."

I shook my head. "No, the world's most delectable bachelor is one of the Saudi princes. What's-his-name, the one who posts goat and horse pics on Insta," I snapped my fingers a couple of times, trying to remember the name as Tony looked at me all offended. "Anyways, you get my point. I could have a go at him, don't you think?" Cocking my shoulder, coyly twirling the strap of my dress, I gave Tony my best come-hither look and was rewarded with an appreciative once-over. His eyes were growing hungry again. 

"You're a million dollar baby," He finally said, voice low. "And the extent of people I would be willing to share you with is very small."

That got me interested, sudden heat prickling underneath my skin. The conversation took a turn I didn't expect it to; and there lied the delight of being around Tony. He was always ready to surprise, in the best way. "Tell me," I requested politely.

"That's a conversation for another time," He was enjoying the chit-chat, desire beginning to creep into his features.

"Mmm, you think?" I allowed the strap of my dress to slip down my shoulder, exposing a collarbone, showing him just how far I was willing to go to satisfy my curiosity.

He swallowed audibly. "I think... You're smart enough to figure it out," He finally gritted his teeth, finishing off his dinner and immediately calling for the check. 

I wasn't done yet, however. The possibility of riling him up, taunting him into a lustful frenzy - I was in heaven. Karma had favoured me that evening, it had given me a chance to get Tony back for all the times he unknowingly made my mouth water and my brain go blip. "Must be Steve then," I bit my lip in thought. 

Honestly? I was as clueless as the couple next table over. Steve it wasn't, that much I knew for sure, he and Tony had their little love/hate dramatic connection that always ended in a massive ego standoff. Tony would be on the frontline fighting against Steve if the blonde dared to show anything even remotely resembling romantic interest towards someone Tony himself had his eyes on.

"Princess," Tony growled, sarcastically raising an eyebrow.

"Not Steve," I replied, cracking a smile. Success! "You know, I'm really bad at guessing who's into me. Unless someone is balls deep in me," My face was mere inches away as we quickly shrugged on our coats. "And even then, I can't be sure."

My giggling was accompanied by Tony shaking his head in exasperated fashion; he took my hand nonetheless and I happily swayed it between us, poster child for "not a care in the world". He allowed it, maintaining the same exasperated air about him, and I let him. Fondness and happiness seeped through that anyways.

"Brat," His voice was kind. And his kiss tingled where he left it on the corner of my mouth, sweet and short. "Here, have a go," Before I could react, the keys to his Rolls Royce were placed in my palm and he was making his way around the car to the passenger's side.

THE TAG LIST IS NOW OPEN! @another-stark-sub ​ @mostly-marvel-musings  @vozit ​ @littlegasps ​ @pilloclock ​ @shereadsinquiet @downeyreads ​ @hermione-grangers-wife ​ @individualistfem ​ @sleep-i-ness @capbrie @lillsxd @agustdowney @dee-vn @justanotherblonde23 @fanngirl19 @persephonehemingway (it finally let me tag you)! @softie-socks @schemefrenzy

[agustdiv1ne]

thank you + milestone!!

damn, never thought we'd get here, did we?

in all honesty, it's been a pretty shit year. march 'til now has felt like the same month on repeat with tiny tweaks to make it all so much worse. but i'm not here to complain about the worst parts of this year, i'm here to celebrate the best ones.

this was the year that i finally started writing, that i was finally spurred to open a google doc and just type away until a tiny work of fiction stared back at me. my first one was 1k words, a rant to get all of my emotions off of my chest with an idol as my muse. it felt...great, though it also felt a bit odd writing after being an avid reader for years. i always did prefer essays to creative writing, but this year definitely changed that perspective.

i wrote that first blurb along with another fic in late july, and in early august, i asked my friends if i should post them. om august 3rd, i changed this blog from a fic rec to a fic writing blog just like that. i regret none of it.

it's been nearly five months since i revamped this blog and i couldn't be more grateful for the support i have gotten from all of you, whether it be a kind comment, a like, a reblog, all of it. i never thought anyone would like my content, but i've been proven severely wrong by this community. from my irls that are on here, to my lovely mutuals and followers, to those i've talked to a lil bit on this hellsite, to the writers whose fics i absolutely adore, to those who have left a like or a comment on one of my fics, i want to say thank you from the very bottom of my heart ♡

have a happy and healthy new year! i love and appreciate every single one of you!!

though i'm painfully bad at writing letters and getting all sappy, i wanted to write them anyways hahaha let's goooo

to @hwaddict:

my irl best friend!! my partner in crime!!!! i love you sm carly, and there are not enough words in this world for me to describe the extent of my love. you have been there for me during my lowest moments, you've seen me cry, and i don't cry in front of many ppl. i trust you with my life and i'm so glad that we became friends back in middle school bc you are one reasons that spur me to keep going. i can't wait to see where life takes us and know that while i might not always be able to be there physically (especially with college right around the corner), i will always be there for you in any way i can be. again i love you and i can't wait to conquer next year with you ♡♡

to @hopejanaee:

hope!! hobi!!! one of my irls! though we just became friends earlier this year, it feels like we've been friends for ages. it's crazy how close we grew so quickly but i am so grateful to have you in my life. you never fail to make me laugh whenever we're together and you're so chaotic but in such a good way hahaha. you were the one who got me into writing with your own wonderful fics so thank yoi for that. i'm so happy that we became friends because you're so kind and caring and ahhhhhh i love u sm ♡

to @oikawasmilkbread:

we talked for like 0.2 seconds but you are so kind and hella cool!! it was nice having random conversations with you and i'm so glad you randomly dmed me bc i am shy and i have 0 idea how to start conversations with anyone lmao. i always smile when i see you in my notifs! i hope you have a happy new year!!! ♡

to @luthenia:

i know you're on hiatus but seeing you in my notifs always excites me hahaha. we never talk but you are so supportive of everyone in this community and i just wanted to shout you out for that! your memes are top tier LMAO and i can't wait for when you come back, happy new year ♡

to @starsforten:

we also talked for approximately 1 second but it was so fun talking to you about astrology stuff (virgo sun libra rising gang hahahaha) and those teuta matoshi dresses! you are so nice and easy to talk to and i hope your new year is happy and fruitful! ♡

i recommend every single one of these blogs for their amazing content!! i added some of my favorite fics as i'm a whore for great writing hahaaaa

@kinktae

waterloo — a masterpiece! taehyung is so bitter at the beginning and it's adorable seeing how y/n breaks his tough shell. loved this from beginning to the end ♡

hot rod — the 50s slang, the dynamic between hoseok and y/n...*chef's kiss*

@untaemedqueen

welcome to seoul land — werewolf!namjoon really got me going, 100/10 would recommend

graceful gods — this is one of my all-time favorites, greek god!jungkook has my brain going brrrr

@shadowsremedy + @therealmintedmango

support system — adorable!! this is a hybrid!yoongi fic i really enjoy, and the series isn't over yet! check it out~

@bratkook

tear you apart — demon!taehyung...holy shit. i was speechless

@tatertotthethot

the doms next door — THIS SERIES OMG, i've read each part at least five times already. taekook got me acting UP

scream (posted to @yandere-society) — a really cool take on the movie scream with jungkook, yandere fics don't always appeal to me but this one absolutely did

@ateezmakemeweep

broken — the immense ache i felt in my chest while reading this, but i loved both parts with a burning passion. san is so sweet in this :')

@atinybrew

dirty free for all — the ULTIMATE demon!san fic. the writing is absolutely immaculate and this is the first fic that had me blushing down my mf ARMS

rice milk lattes and bryophytes roads — another san fic admittedly because i'm whipped for san lol. anyways, this was cute and hot at the same time and best friend!yunho made my double biasing ass that much happier

@seacottons

pan — an adorable peter pan!hongjoong fic, it had my heart going achhfhsjfjsjf

sir kiss me — circus au with san holy hell i loved every twist and turn of this

@actuallythatwaspromise

bad romance — one of my favorite yunho fics ever, punk rock!yunho x nerd!reader has my entire heart

aurora garden center and desire ink — florist!mingi had me uwuing for the entire fic, this was adorable and i loved it sm

@yeonjuncore

every single fic on this blog is an absolute masterpiece, i swear

the devil's little angel — THIS IS ONE OF MY ULTIMATE FAVORITES, demon!yeonjun had me screaming and it was just so fun to read and i loved every single second of it so much that i've read it nearly ten times now. so go read it, you won't regret it!

the boy with the horns — another of my ultimate favorites (i told you, their writing is just that amazing), woodland fey!soobin just had me going so soft :(( i literally sobbed at one point, that's how invested i was

bleeding heart — the tension between vampire!yeonjun and vampire slayer!reader had me screeching

curtain call — i have a sad crush vampire!soobin

i love you, always — this felt so..bittersweet? taehyun loves y/n so much, i lowkey cried while reading this

@angelfic

the art of (mis)communication — i am a whore for both reconciliation and yeonjun, 100000/10 pls read this i beg of you

@angelictaehyun

growing pains — ahhh once again a yeonjun fic, my chest hurt a lil bit at some points but it was so sweet!!

@neovisioned

bed of spiderwebs — spiderman!mark has my heart screeching, i loved every second of it ♡

eddie ate dynamite — johnny suh coming for my throat yet again

cupid victorious — cupid!jaehyun :'))) definitely one of my favorites!!

@domjaehyun

quarantine chronicles — ok if you haven't read this or the part two yet then you're missing out big time!! the tension, the buildup, every single part of this fic was just *chef's kiss* but multiply thay by a million

all these years — every single moment of this felt so nostalgic and the ending was so sweet :')

@caiuscassiuss

muse — i keep going back to this one constantly, the angst in this phenomenal and i love artist!taeyong sm here

@neoct-zen

loverboy — HOT, AMAZING, I SCREAMED. the blurbs that accompany this are also top-tier i recommend reading each and every one!!

@moondustis

pink + white — i'm so soft for mark i stg, this was the cutest thing ever

@loviejaehyun

can't avoid this feeling — hockey player!mark is the best thing ever

all tied up — i just- screamed as i read this bc professor!jaehyun is too hot goodbye

@hopejanaee

incapable — this is one of the best yoongi fics i've ever read ngl, it's not completed quite yet but the parts that have been posted are top tier!!

breathless — THIS. I LOVED THIS. yuta is just so hfjshhfhshfnsn and i love this sm

@hwaddict

melting point — big boy mingiiii, 100/10 would recommend

@okayau

house next to mine — frat boy!yeonjun rly got me going, cute and hot at the same time ahhhhbfnsnnf

youth — ADORABLE, yeonjun's confession is peak i love it here

run away — how many yeonjun fics can i fit in this post? (answer: a lot) definitely one of my favorite harry potter aus!! it was awesome seeing how their relationship changed throughout the years and perhaps i teared up a little at the end :'))

@starrychannies

baby steps — ONE OF ALL-TIME MY FAVORITE FICS ON THIS SITE, every single part is so well-written and ahhhhhfhdhhf chan makes me feel some type of way

my stupid — another yeonjun fic! angsty but v cute at the end :')

@baekhvuns

this youth of craziness — 40k words of pure gold, this fic is absolutely one of my favorite san fics ever!!

replacement — prince!ten makes my brain go brrrr, i love how the y/n just speaks her mind here

@masterninjacow

untitled project — i saw soulmate au with mark and i knew would already love it, and i did! pizza boy!mark at that, amazing and i adored it

more amazing blogs!!: @galaxteez, @poutybinz, @lustjoong, @bloominghigh

these are just a few of the fics and blogs i found this year, find more on my fic rec blog @agustdiv1ne-recs!! (my thumbs are starting to hurt i'm so sorry bfjshfhsh)

wrapping up each month since august since that's when i actually started posting LMAO

☆ august

03: good enough — chan

03: bloodsucker — seonghwa

04: cutie — san

09: veloxrotaphobia — mingi

19: want — changbin

21: numb — yunho

100 follower special — i reached 100 followers towards the end of august, my first ever milestone :') also my first ever time taking requests, 'twas very fun ♡

☆ september

03: on camera — jungkook

☆ october

27: oh, worm? — namjoon

31: demon days — san

☆ november

10: a letter to my love — xiaojun

23: bad for u — jaehyun

27: home sweet home — yeonjun

☆ december

christmas bash 2020 — my brain went hey what if you did this- and i listened so here's 17 holiday fics hahahaa (not all of them are out yet but i'm working on it!!)

things i plan to release in 2021!!

☆ sunflower — jimin

☆ cross — yeonjun

☆ landslide — seonghwa

☆ nice save — san

☆ red — hyunjin

☆ a secret series (that will be revealed once i plan everything) — ateez

☆ 4 unrelated secret fics oOoOoo — will i reveal them? you'll just have to wait and see ;)

there will definitely be more posted! these are the ones that are going to be my priority at first, but my imagination is always churning so expect a lot more :)) check out all of non-secret wips here!

i hit 500 followers a couple days ago! i nearly screamed when i saw that LMAO. thank you so much for liking my content because i work hella hard on it :') sometimes i feel like i don't deserve y'all really, but @hwaddict will yell at me if i say that so ig i take it back hfhshhdhg

a post for celebrating this milestone will come as soon as i finish up the rest of my christmas fics!! sorry that i'm so slow :( (hint: my requests will be open, so look out for it!)

so yeah!! that's it, sorry for the painfully long post (i'm sorry to my thumbs for typing this whole thing out </3). thank you to everyone who read this far!! i hope everyone has a happy and healthy new year, and in the words of txt's cover, fuck 2020. may 2021 be a much better year for all of us!!!

much love,

ashlee ♡

[kaiparker-avengerssmut]

CURSED: CHAPTER TEN

"the angels never arrived"

Kai Parker x OC!Mack Grace

Series synopsis: "We're both cursed, in a way."

We all know the story of Kai Parker, but he once lived in a very different life. Do you ever wonder what that life looked like?

Chapter summary: Christmas get a little...deadly

Warnings: violence, death

Masterlist | Series Masterlist

VIOLENTLY bright and tacky lights were strung through the halls, spare corners and classrooms decorated with paper snowflakes and plastic Christmas trees and the general spirits of student was lifted at least thirty percent by the approaching break. Mack sighed and closed her locker, turning to face Jo as she filled her in on everything that happened when she was away.

"So who's this mystery guy that keeps coming up then?" Jo urged with a raised brown, poking Mack in the side playfully with her elbow.

"Just that. A mystery." Mack retorted, scoffing and rolling her eyes at the overly invested girl.

"A mystery, huh? Well I do love a good problem to solve." Jo teased. "If I can't know who he is, at least tell me what happened." No suggested. After a long pause to mill it over, Mack finally caved.

"Okay, so - don't freak out, but I may have slept with him." Mack all but whispered. Jo cupped her ear with her hand and said:

"What was that? I couldn't hear you." Mack chewed her bottom lips before repeating.

"I slept with him. Twice." Jo's eyes went wide.

"Twice?!" Mack but her lips and nodded. Suddenly an arm was thrown over her shoulder and Mack turned to see a grinning Kai.

"So what's this?" He asked, mock shock on his face.

"Mack finally found a way to forget Ben." Jo stated.

"Ooooo, so Kenz's finally getting some?" Mack rolled her eyes. "It's about time really, I was getting fed up with her cranking attitude and-" he cut off when Mack hit him in the shoulder and he retracted his arm, shooting her a knowing look.

"It's not like that. It was a spur of the moment kind of thing, I doubt it will happen again." She dismissed, giving Kai a warning look.

"If you say so. Hey, this is me. Catch you guys later!" Jo said as they reached her class.

"Won't happen again, huh?" Kai husked lowly in Mack's ear once Jo was gone.

"Yes. So don't try anything." Kai's mischievous grin worried Mack and before she knew it he had grabbed her hand and pulled her into Janitor's closet and pressed her against the closed door.

"Like this?" He whispered, nibbling softly at her earlobe. She put her hands on his chest and pushed Kai back slightly.

"Yes, like this."

"We have a free period, may as well use it." He shot back with arched brows. He stepped closer to her again. "I know you want to." His minty breath fanned over her face, intoxicating her further. Mack looked away, and before he could get another word in she smashed her lips to his, her arms wrapping around his neck.

Kai was taken back at first but he quickly melted into the kiss, bracing a hand on the door beside Mack and his other settled on her hip after running over her curves.

"This is the last time this happens." Mack mumbled against his lips, gasping as Kai picked her up and wrapped her legs around his waist before crashing her back to the door again.

"Okay." He murmured back, knowing full-well it wouldn't be.

...

"So what are you guys doing for Christmas?" Mack wondered aloud as Kai drove her and Jo home.

"Yeah, our family is going to San Francisco to see our cousins." Jo explained. "Well Kai isn't, as usual." she added almost accusingly.

"So you're gonna be on your own for Christmas?" Mack's question was directed at Kai now. he scoffed.

"So?" he seemed completely disinterested. Mack's eyes were wide.

"So?! What are you on about? It's Christmas!" Mack exclaimed, shocked. After a moment of thinking she came up with a solution. "Why don't you join my family for Christmas? It's only my dad, my sister and me but it's normally quite funny and we could always use some extra company." she quickly added, "and you can probably cook better than any of us."

After a moment of no answer Mack spoke again.

"You don't have to, I just didn't think you'd want to be alone. Think about it." She said as Kai pulled up to he house. "Thank you for the lift, bye!" and with that she climbed out Kai's car, slinging her bag over her shoulder and opening her front door.

"Hey dad." she said, dumping her bag on the table and grabbing an apple from the fruit bowel.

"Hey sweetheart." he chimed back, focus still on his notepad in front of him. "have a good day at school? How's Kai?" Mack took a bite of her apple.

"School's..." she trailed off, thinking about the Janator's closet, "fine, I guess. And Kai's good too. Speaking of Kai, can he spend Christmas with us? His family is going away and he'll be alone." Mack put her pleading face on.

"Of course he can, that boy has been a great help to you these past few months and I'd love to finally meet him. Do you want to give him a call?" he suggested, finally looking up from his work.

"I'll call him later. I've got homework to do, so I'll just be up in my room if you need me." Mack said, walking towards the stairs.

"Oh honey," her dad started. she turned back to face him.

"Yeah, dad?"

"Kim's boyfriend is also joining us this year."

"Boyfriend?"

"Yeah, they started going out recently. I think he's younger than her - maybe your age. I am yet to meet him, so she thought Christmas would be the perfect opportunity."

"Okay." Mack walked up the stairs, the cogs of her mind churning, trying to figure out who her sister was dating.

...

"Kai! Finally, I thought you'd never come." Mack greeted cheerfully, smiling widely at Kai would held a few stacked trays covered with tea-towels in his hands.

"And miss seeing you in this little get-up?" He gestured to her red dress and Santa hat, "not a chance in the world, sweetheart." Kai grinned back, placing a quick kiss on her cheek as he walked into the house.

"You must be Kai!" Her Dad said as he saw Kai, Kim taking the plates from him as he mouthed a thank you before returning to her dad.

"Correct. You must be Mr Grace." Kai mentioned, shaking his hand firmly.

"Oh, please call me Ian." Ian waved off, releasing Kai's hand.

"Well, it's good to meet you, Ian. Thank you so much for having me." Kai thanked.

"Oh, it's no big deal. It's nice to have some more company for a change." Ian smiled. Kai turned to Kim.

"Ah, the sister." He said with a tight smile.

"Ah, the boyfriend." She mimicked. Kai had an amused smile at that.

"Not quite, just the best friend for now. I don't think she's quite over-" he was cut off when he heard Mack's horror filled voice whisper.

"Ben." She stood completely frozen, the door wide open and a smirking Ben stood on the other side, a small box tucked under his arm.

"Hey doll, how are you?" He said with a sickeningly cheery smile that made Kai clench his fists. After the moment of awkward silence, Kim walked over, pecking Ben on the lips and taking his hand, leading him into the house.

"So, everyone. Ben is my boyfriend, we started talking a few months ago. And we're really happy." Kim announced, standing hand-in-hand with a grinning Ben. Kai put his hands on Mack's shoulders, looking into her eyes with concern.

"You gonna be okay?" He whispered, thumbs stroking her shoulder soothingly. She swallowed thickly before nodding, still looking straight ahead with a look of emptiness in her eyes. She closed the door, sticky heading towards the sofa and pulling Kai down to sit next to her.

They zoned out the interaction currently happening, Mack's body slumping against Kai until she laid down, her head in his lap. He played with her hair, trying to quell the building anger inside him.

"So, Ben - long time no see?" Ian said with a bright smile and mockingly-sad tone. Ben smiled at the man from where he sat beside Kim, his arm slung over her shoulder.

"Yeah, well, after me and Mack decided to end things, it got lonely for me. Then I bumped into Kim at the diner down the road and we just got to...talking." Ben mused, but Mack could tell by the mischievous glint in his eye they did something, but talking was not it. "And ever since then, we've been practically inseparable." He finished, entwining his hand with Kim's and smiling down at her with warmth, but a dark undertone still lingered in his gaze.

"Well, I hope it isn't awkward between you kids." Ian joked, gesturing from Ben to Mack with his hand, which had a bottle of beer comfortably settled in it. Ben chuckled and Mack forced a smile, but Kai was practically seething, it glare emitting nothing but anger as he shot an icy stare at Ben. Mack noticed this and gently tugged him away.

"We'll go get dinner ready." She said with a small smile as she pulled Kai into the kitchen, slamming the door behind him and looking into his eyes - which remained fixed on the door as his nostrils flared and his face burned crimson. "Hey, hey. Look at me." Mack soothed as she placed her hands on the sides of Kai's face, stroking his cheekbones softly with her thumbs. His gaze broke and he looked down at her, his expression softening at the sight of Mack.

"I'm sorry, Kenz. I just- I can't stand him." Kai seethed and Mack shushed him gently.

"I know, but I need you to stay calm for me." She whispered and he nodded slowly. "Now, how 'bout we get this food ready?" Mack suggested and Kai's anger seemed to melt away at the mention of food, his shoulders relaxing and a wide smile replacing his frown. He leant down, kissing Mack languidly before pulling away and walking over to the oven.

"You do the veg and I'll handle the Turkey?" Kai grinned and Mack smiled warmly.

...

"This is delicious, Kai. Thank you so much for bringing it." Ian commented, mouthful of food as he eagerly wolfed down the plate of Christmas dinner Mack had served him.

"Yeah, I guess you can cook much better than you can throw a punch, huh?" Ben jeered with an amused grin. Mack and Kim grimaced and Kai had to stop himself from dropping his fork. Or stabbing it into Ben's hand, for that matter. Kai looked up at Ben with a fake smile.

"I guess so." He chuckled and Ben followed, the tension melting as they all continued to eat. "But, you know, just for the record." Kai started and Mack put her knife and fork down, burying her face in her hands as Ben raised a brow and Ian looked between the two boys. "I think you're a much better conversationalist than boyfriend." Kai mused.

"And what makes you say that?" Ben prompted.

"Well, from what I  can tell you can make it through a whole conversation with out hitting someone, unlike your relationships." Kai snapped and Ian's eyes widened, Ben's jaw ticked and he gripped his fork tightly. "Notting to say to that, sick bastard?" Kai taunted and Ben's jaw clenched and he abruptly stood.

Kai followed soon after. Mack reached out for him, placing a hand on Kai's arm but he shrugged her off. Kim seemed to be frozen and their dad looked completely lost. Ben made the first move, stepping around the table. Kai was soon to copy him but as Ben threw his fist Kai caught it with ease. He smirked at Ben.

"Still wanna tell me I can't throw a punch?" Kai asked with raised brows and Ben's angered face melted into one of fear and he coward away from Kai. "Didn't think so." Kai muttered before twisting Ben's arm round and holding it against his back as Ben cried out in pain. "Now, why don't you leave and stay the fuck away from Kenz, huh? I know how much you like to lay your hands on her.." Kai trailed off and let Ben go, who stumble forward and practically bolted from the house, the door slamming with a bang behind him the reverberated from the walls like thunder.

"Get. Your. Fuck-buddy. Under. Control." Kim spat at Mack before storming off, the sound of the legs of her chair scraping bitterly against the floor was punctuated awkwardly but the slam of the door behind her. A thick tension rose, thick enough that a knife could slice straight through it like it was cutting cheesecake.

"Well.." Ian began but Mack was gone, the last thud of the door causing both Kai and Ian to flinch as the wood smashed against the battered frame.

"I'm sorry-" Kai tried to apologise, turning to face the man but Ian held up a hand, halting Kai's words.

"No. You did the right thing, boy. I can't believe I let that boy in my home - near my daughters!" Ian gritted out and Kai's jaw clenched. "I should have been a better father..."  he murmured.

"No." Kai said harshly, making Ian's head snap up to look at him. "You are not at fault. Ben is a vile creature who deserves to rot in hell." Kai spat and Ian nodded. "And if you think you're a bad father, you are strongly mistaken. If you knew how much Kenz appreciates you,     you'd-" Kai's little sprang was cut off when a violent buzzing echoed from his pocket. Kai pulled out his pager to see Mack's number and instantly rushed to the phone.

"Kenz? Oh my god, Kenz! You had us worried sick! Where are you? I'll come pick you up-"

"I killed him, Kai. He's - he's dead."

[indyflanery]

Name: Sam

Pronouns: She/her

Muses: Just Indy. The few other muses I had failed spectacularly due to either lack of interest or in compatability.

Preference Of Communication: Tumblr through asks or DMs. I don't have time to be on discord and barely have time to be on here a lot.

Experience: Fan fiction/general writing since I was like single digits age, so 20+ of general writing. I've been writing indy for ten years come May.

Best Experience: Ummm...I'm not entirely sure I can think of one. Nothing stands out as brilliant.

Platforms You’ve Used: Here, AIM, and Discord. (When LiveJournal and fanfiction.net were things, I wrote there. Lol)

RP Pet Peeves and Deal Breakers: Smut for the sake of smut; writing that does not actually advance the plot; lack of character development (all the character does is act/react with no actual exposition); big discussions into plotting and writing starters that never get picked up by your partner; partners that you have super invested writing and shipping muses with who just ghost you for no given reason. TDLR - invest time into your writing, communicate, and don't be a dick and we're good.

Plots or Memes: Memes can help get things going (but don't always have to be first meetings) but plots are preferred, especially with a broad 'where is this going' discussion.

Fluff/Angst/Smut: Angst and smut (plotted) are my bread and butter, angst especially. Fluff is good on occasion.

Long or Short Replies: Depends on the context of the RP line and level of inspiration. One line replies are right out.

Best Time To Write: When I have inspiration? I don't force it. I've written replies in the middle of the night, late at night, midday, etc.

Are You Like Your Muses?: We're both archaeologists with rejection sensitivities, otherwise no way.

Tagged by: @storiesofthenight

Tagging: anyone who wants to

[tricksheart]

|| I found your blog when I first made Goro. I was just trying to find people to write with, and I came across you! I thought your blog looked really cool along with your writing. What made me stay was that your blog is still just as cool as when I first saw it. I've really enjoyed your take on Akira. It's very unique and offers a perspective that I wouldn't have ever thought of. And it keeps me very invested!

What drew you to my blog initially, and what, so far, has made you stay?

Is it the mun’s muses, their writing style, their worldbuilding? Is it the mun themselves? All of the above? Let ‘em know!

@kingspuppet

Apologies to having this in my inbox for so long. But thank you for putting your trust into me and my muse. I've been writing Akira since even before Persona 5 came out when all fans had was a small silhouette of the protagonist and just a couple of chairs. Hence where the nickname Chair-kun came from. So I've had him a long time to get all of the lines smoothed out of him. Of course, I am still working on him since AkiRen is a self insert character for the most part. Not one version is going to be the same and I have to keep telling myself that since I do write him somewhat unconventional at times. With my writing, I've been picking up the pen and paper since I was in middle school. I've always loved writing. Maybe because my mom has published poems out in the nation but I think I am just drawn to the arts mostly. Music, drawing, writing, movies, books, I think they all fall under the same category.

Anyways, I rambled off a little. Back to the point. I thank you for your compliment and for staying. I'm glad I can spark some interest even after years of having him as a muse. He's changed a lot since I first picked him up but Akira is seriously one of my most favorite characters of all time. Almost placed above Sailor Moon / Serena / Usagi as that is how much he means to me since I loved the Sailor Moon series ever since I was five years old. So you can tell how much I hold AkiRen close to my heart. Also, I see a lot of myself in him. And I love the fact his glasses are for show since I really do need mine and I think that's really cool. Also I act different when I am work than I am at home either by myself or people that I had let into my comfort space. As I am a difficult person to get to know, just like what AkiRen's Japanese voice actor had to say about his character. I guess I have that mysterious charm that fits into my muse. lol. Also I love memes, especially the beep boop and the delicious pancakes lines. In all, thanks for your continuing support as I always look forward to seeing you are your take on Goro since he's a very difficult character to write by certain standpoints and I applaud you for that.

[rpbetter]

Hi Vespertine. Can you offer some advice on how to RP a character that a lot of people think I shouldn't be RPing? I've wanted to RP Hans Landa for years, I like how cunning he is and how he could react to other ideals, how he could grow, especially in modern settings where he would stick out a lot. But I'm afraid because of how people react to muses like him. How do I build up confidence? How do I keep RPing if people bother or threaten to report me? Would people even RP with me? Thank you.

Alright, first thing, I've apologized on the blog already, apologized to people before you, but like I keep saying: it's really important to specifically apologize to individuals when we do something lame like I have. I did not intend to leave the blog unattended for months, but I did. This is an important question, it's right up the alley of why I created this blog, and I left you hanging. I'm deeply sorry, and I hope that my serious delay did not cause you any further worries or to give up on your character/RP!

Okay, we can proceed now!

I'll confess, I seriously spaced on who Hans Landa was for a moment there, but quickly remembered upon Googling! He was an interesting character, and I love that movie! However, I definitely see why you're worried, Anon.

Up until the last decade, taking up a character who was villainous, yes, even a Nazi, was a mark of creative gumption. Almost everyone had a verse for their muse that today would get them anon hate, callouts, reported, and so on. You know what? We had far less drama then. So, I'm not at all in the camp of demonizing your choices, or anyone else's. I saw what worked for a more peaceful RPC for decades and I've seen what is a total nightmare on tumblr.

Unfortunately, it is a total nightmare. So, let's see what you might be looking at, what your options are.

Firstly, you have the right idea; this is a character that appeals to you creatively, and that's really all that should matter. You've got ideas, you want to see your muse grow and change through interactions, and that's very much what the whole RPC needs to be a little more interested in.

I think, based on that alone, you would find people who wanted to write with you. There are quite a few muns out there dying for more interesting interactions with muses who have been taken up because the other mun really wants to write and develop them. Especially in the multi-para and novella communities. It's a bit of bane over there, the way the majority of muses are picked purely to satisfy a fleeting interest in a fandom. They don't come across as the characters they are in canon, are never given the opportunity to develop uniquely, they just exist to fulfill the mun's intense interest that will be gone soon. That works wonderfully and happily for some, but there really are a lot of muns out there who are interested in different approaches.

I will also say that most longer multi-para and novella RPers are less supportive of callout culture and content policing. When the very way that you enjoy RP is easily considered problematic on the grounds that you take it too seriously because you're invested in it, you tend to be against labeling others and giving them a hard time. That portion of the RPC, additionally, tends to be made up of older adults. The RPC kind of despises anyone over 25 who is still RPing, and I think a decent part of that is...this. We don't usually go in on equating fiction to reality, thinking that muse=mun, or that "problematic" material needs to be driven into the darkest void for communal safety. A great deal of that is because we lived through multiple fandom experiences being obliterated by these sorts of ideas, we know this is all detrimental to the community, and are more interested in a live and let live mentality even if we are disturbed by someone's muse or writing topics.

You may wish to specifically seek out RPers who are serious veterans (around for 10+ years), multi-para to novella writers, and/or have things in their rules that imply toleration and support for dark topics, villain muses, etc. (I know I have it in my rules that minors shouldn't interact with this blog due both its content and my age, but I can't exactly verify that with an anonymous message! So, Anon, please be aware I am giving this advice as though you are legally an adult.) Seek out muns who have muses that could also be considered "problematic" or who interact with muses who could be.

Remain away from anyone participating in or supportive of callout culture and purity policing. I know that can be difficult and limiting, and it is also not a 100% safe bet that you will be avoiding problems, but at least you'll know right off that these are not your people. That includes the ever-present callouts that claim the poster "never does this," that the mun being called out is just that much of a danger, and/or those dealing in the major callout-laden muns in your corner of the community. You might agree that one or two of those muns is a legitimate problem, but it's too likely that these people are going to feel like you are too.

Know that you will, inevitably, be called worse than just a "villain apologist." I write a muse that I wanted to write for years as well, and refrained from writing for so long because of the fandom's ideas about them. However, I have never been so happy with any muse choice, it's worth it to me to have some random hatefulness sometimes. I know I'm not a horrible person, the people who matter to me on and offline know that I am not, it doesn't actually matter what someone on tumblr thinks. It doesn't matter what they think about you either, they don't know you and won't give you the opportunity to be known, so pfft to them!

It can still be a little disheartening to hear some of the especially hateful things. While my muse isn't like Hans, the comparison to that is often made. There are a lot of assumptions about my personal character, race, gender, political affiliation, and so on. I'm just going to say it: if you don't think you can handle someone randomly attacking you and labeling you as "actually a Nazi," a genocide supporter, school shooter, "white cishet republican," and so on, do not subject yourself to this. Just write with friends you know are on your side or write some fic where there is some distance and control.

I do not believe, after reviewing them again, that you would be violating tumblr's TOS by writing this muse. You would not be promoting racism, harm to others, or misleading information. Nor would you be harassing anyone. Does that mean no one will try to report you? No, unfortunately. I've gotten reported for politely disagreeing on a post and asking a question! The important thing is that nothing will happen.

I would still make it very clear that this character might be offensive to some. Seriously, I would say, "In the interest of sensitivity, please note that this muse might be offensive to some - do not interact if imagery or topics associated with historical Nazis will be triggering for you. Hans Landa is from the film 2009 Quentin Tarantino film Inglourious Basterds." Pop that into the top of a pinned post, your rules, and your blog's header statement.

Because even if tumblr wasn't a mess, it's still the most responsible thing to do to treat this sensitively. It is a sensitive matter! People should have every opportunity to be aware and make the best choice for them to interact or not.

People almost certainly will threaten to report and block. Particularly when you are still looking for writing partners and having to expose yourself to more of the community in order to do so. It'll get so much better when you start finding them, though, I promise! Once you find a good mun or two, you've kind of unlocked a pocket of potential. Those people who are more accepting, reasonable, and interested in writing and characters are naturally going to be interacting with other like-minded muns.

Finding a good base of partners might take you some time, but the good news is, the whole process will help you build up the confidence to keep writing. It helps you get in touch with both writing and the muse, what is really important to you as an RPer, and is what isn't. It feels shitty at the time, but in the end, it builds a lot of confidence in yourself, and when you pull confidence from within you, you're never totally without it again!

When you're looking for those people (I'd additionally suggest historical RPers, if there is any existent community for the movie still, and branching out to fandoms that have "problematic" characters in them that you could do crossovers with in modern settings etc.), you can still be writing and developing your muse. Write up headcanons, fleshout the character's backstory, make multiple verses so that you have many options ready to go, do some one-shots.

A great way to do that is to find memes or traditional writing questions specifically for character development, but don't wait for someone to ask you! Go down the meme/list, pick some questions that spark your interest, and base your HC posts on them. Answer questions you immediately have answers to, answer the really hard ones you have no clue about. You don't know until you develop it, after all!

It helps with confidence so much to feel confident about your writing and comfortable with the character. It'll also help non-judgemental RPers who come across your blog or want to follow you back to see your writing and interest in the muse. I know that there are muses I was not interested in from their canon, but seeing the mun's love for them and how they had uniquely developed them, I had to interact!

When you do receive the almost inevitable anon hate, I'm going to suggest something a bit radical here; the idea of not feeding the trolls doesn't always work. That's predicated upon people not already receiving a reward for sending that hate to you. You can't starve what has already eaten lunch! I've found that demonstrating that they're not getting to you is more effective, in all, incredibly controversial honesty.

Put in your rules that anon hate will be addressed only with something like...a gif of a rabbit, a random fact, or a link to a song you recommend. Then, you do exactly that. You get a message calling you derogatory things, but instead of deleting it or going off about it in a way they can just use, you respond with a picture of a bunny cleaning its ears. Block the anon after.

This, again, in all honesty, is a confidence booster. Sometimes, building confidence is about projecting it first. You are projecting an aura of non-hostile confidence that you're not any of those negative things in reality, nor is your life ruined by people who haven't anything better to do with their own lives than bother you as performative "activism" online. It's alright if it really does bother you at first! Eventually, it won't. Eventually, you'll be left in peace with the reasonable muns you've found.

You will find them! There are still muns out there who feel like the most important factors in RP are engaging muses and writing, and how the mun is truly conducting themselves. If that mun is a genuinely decent person who isn't starting problems, harassing people, forcing anything on anyone, that's what matters! Just put your muse out there in a thoughtful way around people who are interested in writing. Be respectful of the sensitive nature of the subject, tag liberally and correctly.

No matter what tumblr's RPC says, you do have the right to write any muse or topic you so desire. People also have the right to not interact, of course, but since you're concerned about it (and truly, the person who is most likely to be made uncomfortable on here), I highly doubt you'll be trying to force interactions or anything.

Unfortunately, when you write any, even vaguely, problematic muse here, you are held to higher standards. You are obliged to be ten times nicer in the face of hatefulness, to be more aware of tagging and other warnings, and so on. It's kind of a practice in acceptance, and it can be frustrating. Again, if the muse is worth it to you, it'll be fine. Just know that you'll need to not be reactive to nastiness, very responsible in how you present yourself in all ways, and that it still won't be enough for some people. And know that's alright as well! They're making a choice to be hostile without knowing you or employing the adult maturity to just not interact with you, not you.

I know it's very easy to say "don't let people get to you." Perhaps especially from someone who will openly say in the tumblr RPC in 2021 that it's 100% fine to write a Nazi muse lol but please know that my confidence was not naturally occurring. It was developed across years of nonsense, and much of it offline, in person. So, I'm not flippantly advising you to have a level of fortitude out of nowhere! I'm honestly telling you that it is a process, but I think that if you want something bad enough to stick to it through the hardest part of it, you kind of expedite that process. It makes it a bit easier if you're still enjoying yourself!

So, on that note, my additional advice is to have another muse or other hobby you can enjoy during the difficult patches, or even slow times before you establish a good group of writing partners. Do things that will keep you feeling positive and motivated to write. That looks different for everyone, but I'm certain you have something. If that does happen to be another muse, or muses, I would strongly suggest you keep it to yourself that you are the mun of this one until you get rolling. While you have exactly nothing to be ashamed of, don't tempt ruining your fun on the other blog(s) until you are established on the new one and confident about it.

If you ever need to vent or further advice, I'm not going to vanish or anything again! Drop by any time you need to, Anon. Sometimes it goes a long way knowing that even a single person out there supports you!

I hope this helped a little, and I do support you! I think you've got this!

[confessionsofa-roleplayer]

I'd like advice. I have this friend that I do appreciate and we've been friends for a long time, though admittedly we never actually threaded much at first. He's a very popular canon blog and I'm a private, nobody oc blog. Lately, even though he's my friend, I'm so tired and frustrated with his portrayal and headcanons yet many people love them. I'm willing to still write with him, but I don't want to ship again and I think he really wants to even though I've expressed I'm unsure if it'll work.

(Ran out of room) I feel like a horrible person for not being in favor of his headcanons and desire to ship. And I think what makes me not want to ship with him anymore is also because it feels like he just wants my muse as part of his ship collection. It didn’t have that special feeling when we shipped and it just felt like he treated it the same as most of his other ships, so nothing was really unique. He’s a genuinely good guy with good intentions, but I don’t think we can mesh well anymore.

Why feel like a horrible person for not being in favor of his headcanons or his desire to ship? Just because he’s your friend doesn’t mean you are obligated to agree with him / his portrayal or do whatever he wants, especially if it would make you uncomfortable to do so. I’ve certainly had friends (and still do) that I don’t 100% agree with how they write a certain character or their ideas / headcanons regarding a particular muse, and some of them I don’t want to ship with, either at all or just in certain ways. Same goes for them too, and I don’t take it personally; we’re friends but we’re still separate people and we have our own tastes and opinions. Just like you and your friend.

But my advice is essentially the same as it was in the last ask I answered regarding something like this, and it would be for most similar asks along this vein. Communication, especially between friends but even just in general, should – in most cases – always be the first step in situations like these. Tell him that you feel your ship is lackluster and doesn’t really feel unique, and see if he’s willing to plot something out with you to change that. Bring up any major issues you have with his headcanons if they impact your ship or muse, see if he’d be willing to alter or forego them for you specifically. Basically just try to address and solve the issue instead of just calling it quits immediately.

Though, as I’ve also said before, you aren’t required to do any of this. You don’t technically owe him anything and you could just end the ship and move on, but I do caution against this as being the first choice, because all too often people just drop and run when hit with the smallest obstacle. I think that’s part of the reason why you see a lot of confessions about how fewer and fewer people seem less committed and invested in plots and ships; they’re afraid that once they have something going, suddenly their partner will decide it’s no longer working for them, and instead of at least attempting to fix that, the person will just walk away.

So if you think there’s a possible scenario where you could grow to enjoy your interactions with your RP partner again, I encourage you to approach him about your concerns. If you can’t make it work, at least you can say you tried, right?

— mod Sky