#[ DNDJHE DONT READ THIS NGHFHGE ]

[nakanaai]

so i finished the 1,000 followers video, but it turned out lame, so im not sure if i want to share it? otherwise i’ll be working on my bias list soon. 

i’ve honestly been lacking my kiragi muse if i want to be truthful, mainly because i’m beginning to become irrelevant even during the periods in which i post things. i don’t have much to look forward to when i go on kiragi, because my main shiro, hisame, percy, etc. are not active anymore. in fact, i’m seeing a really big lack in second generation characters, which is probably contributing to my blankness with kiragi atm.

i mean, i tried taking up a first generation muse — but no fates characters fit my writing that i sort of have to force out. i’ve tried making a first gen oc too, but i lost the muse for him fairly quickly as well. i do have a henry, but his muse is terribly picky — especially with the absence of gwen, whom had encouraged me to make henry.

i will by no ways be taking a hiatus, because there’s no reason for me to — i don’t have any other hobbies besides here, in which i jump between all my blogs hoping for some sort of activity. kiragi being picky because none of his friends are around — and chrysanthos & hachiman lacking a large interest, which causes me to run out of things to do on their blogs quickly.

but, anyways, i think that’s just the main problem with kiragi right now — there’s just a cesspool of first gens i’m following, which is fine! because i love everyone and all their muses, and everyone deserves my follow. however, as a second generation blog i cannot interact with others very well — especially the first gens, if it does not concern being child/parent. i know it’s an obvious route to go, but i’m a little tiny bit tired of starters that concern kiragi’s hunting. i mean, that’s fun and all, but it’s typically just them greeting kiragi from a hunting trip and/or them joining him.

but i get it!! kiragi is hunter boi and that’s his entire character & everything, and i don’t blame anyone for making any of those sorts of starters. but over the course of my almost year here ... i’ve gotten a LOT of those sorts of threads, and they frankly tend to die easily. nothing or nobody in mind atm concerning it, i’m just putting it out there.

back to the point, yeah. there’s just this lack of second generation characters that i can have fun interacting with ( as kiragi ) — like??? where tf are all the hoshidan kids ??? thhATS MY CONCERN TBH ... idk man. i just want some unique threads between these children whom went through so much. instead of doing a hunting thread, maybe we could do something like “kiragi gets FUCKING STUCK in a BOULDER and he calls for help for 5 hours and almost starves” or “kiragi and your muse take in the wonderful ways of FISHING”

i guess my kiragi just has no motivation to do anything when there’s nobody to have motivation for. most takumis are pretty central on their own relationships ( which is great!! ) & i have the opportunity to pop in here and there, but in all honesty, i guess i’m just looking for an opportunity for kiragi to go “hELLO YES COME TO ME!!!” again.

i love the community a lot, but we’ve been receiving a lot of dents lately, and that hurts me to say — because people leave when there’s dents, and rumors spread, and it’s just a terrible thing. i don’t want to leave this community, nor will i in the near future — this is my home, after all. but for now, i’ll sort of just be ... hanging around. i’m always online, whether that be on my elise fankid @faeriecrowned or my more recent izana fankid @warbeast or even my lilith fankid @astralpulse, so don’t think i’m never watching, mWAHAHA...

tldr; (kiragi voice) i just want to feel loved again