#[ *shills dragon ball shills dragon ball* ] | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

jotun-philosopher · 6 months ago

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Image description: a set of 7 polyhedral dice used for Dungeons & Dragons in a line on top of a closed laptop covered in artistic stickers. The dice are made of blue-and-white plastic. They are lined up in order (from left to right): d4 (tetrahedron); d6 (cube); d8 (octahedron); two d10s (decahedron, specifically pentagonal trapezohedron), one numbered with digits 0 to 9 and the other numbered 00 to 90; one d12 (dodecahedron); one d20 (icosahedron). In the middle background is a lacquered box with a pattern of flowers. <end image description>

I kinda impulse-bought this dice set a little while ago because I thought they looked pretty XD I don't anticipate being able to use them for D&D any time soon, but they make for nice little fidget things, and it's fun to puzzle out the number placement rules for each different shape:

d4: If the number on the upward point is odd, the others run around the base clockwise in ascending order; if the upward-pointing number is even, the other numbers run around the base anti-clockwise in ascending order.

d6: Numbers on opposite faces add up to seven.

d8: If a number is odd, the next number in the sequence appears on the opposite face; 3 and 7 appear to the right of 2 and 6 respectively, while 5 appears to the left of 4.

d10: Odd-numbered faces cluster around one narrow point on the 'top' of the die, while even-numbered faces cluster around the narrow point on the 'bottom'; opposing faces add up to 9 or 90, depending on the specific d10.

d12: Opposite faces add up to 13.

d20: Opposite faces add up to 21.

(The lacquered box is just a small ornamental thing from my late grandmother's vast collection of ornaments; it's of a good size to hold all the dice, with room to spare, and the lid fits well.)

As part of the good-fidget thing mentioned above, these dice are kinda fun to use for small sleight-of-hand things, like this shilling-and-farthing trick:

(I bet you were wondering where the Good Omens reference would come in, huh? :P Always good to have some adorable angelic enthusiasm around!)

I use the d4 and d20, because they're about as visually distinct as a shilling and a farthing would be. The necessary hand movements for a discreet palming of the 'disappearing' die are different, too, because a lump of bright blue-and-white plastic is a lot easier to see from a distance than a comparatively dull-coloured coin. Still working on that bit! (Got it halfway worked out; it's possible to use the ball of the thumb and the opposing edge of the hand to 'hold on' to something like a d20 without seeming to, and discreetly holding a corner of a d4 between one's fingers is easy enough)

There's also a part of my brain that keeps saying 'THEY LOOK LIKE SWEETIES PUT ONE IN YOUR MOUTH!' and I have to keep reminding it that my age is measured in years, not months... Ehehehe

#dice #dnd dice #polyhedral dice #rpg dice #polyhedra #geometry #sleight of hand #good omens #aziraphale #cutie pie #rambling

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fff777 · 1 year ago

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WayV on the Kstar next door!!!!!!

LMAO Winwin doing "oh yeah come on in!" while pressing the 'close door' buttons thing XD

LOL Jonathan and the KStar next door completed the NCT Dragon ball by inviting all the NCT subunits (except New Team I guess)

Ten: We're NCT members too!!!!!

OMG with their first question Jonathan made them address why they're a kpop group that performs in places that aren't predominantly Korean and speak English XD So much for there not being any hard questions lol

Hendery talking with taxi drivers for half an hour XD He does seem like that kind of guy who can small talk though!

Deep sigh at Love Talk English version lyrics XD

Ten explaining away the lyrics for our innocent child ears

Winwin: What is happening????

LMAO I REMEMBER THIS! Every time Jonathan said that Renjun did something he'd be like "who....me????" like he was being arrested XD

Jonathan: Honestly, I don't know where to look (at Ten) XD

Ten: Sexy is the theme. Ten: That was a joke. Jonathan: It was not a joke.

Jonathan @ Xiaojun: Wipe that smirk off your face Jonathan: *Whips out racy photo of Xiaojun in bed*

Ten said Winwin is good at keeping people on the hook XD XD You heard it here, folks!! Ten said Winwin is PLAYING COY

Omg right Oct 28 is Winwin's birthday <3

Winwin's profile is about him being the most loved of NCT X'D YESSSSSSSSSS

Haechan kissu!!! <3

Xiaojun said that Haechan loves Winwin the most >3

I feel like this is an older post? The crew went deep in their research lol

THE PRESSURE IS ON Jonathan asked Winwin who he liked the most in NCT :P

Winwin said that he likes Haechan because Haechan pulls a lot of pranks and Hendery and Ten just went hold my fucking beer

Winwin said it's because Haechan's not annoying when he pulls a prank but apparently Hendery is super fucking annoying when he pulls a prank lmfao

Xiaojun girl group dance showcase let's go

Winwin said Hendery is a hidden moron X'D

LMFAO Making Hendery reenact the joker dance with Xiaojun singing the accompaniment and getting really into it. They are the idiot brothers XD

I didn't know about this lol. Apparently something was broken backstage at the NCT Nation concert and they made WayV fill up time by speaking in Korean. That was why they had to do the aegyo battle?!?!?!?!?

Ten's reenactment of Winwin preparing for aegyo battle was all 'hold my beer' lol

Ten, please reenact your washroom sitting pose

WayV are close as demonstrated by them willing to share the washroom with each other lol

Reaction meme. Also Sicheng just casually leaning on Ten's thigh lol.

So Ten is strict about age hierarchy in Korea :P

Winwin is all heehee about Ten being a strict hyung because they arrived in Korea on the same day XD If I remember correctly, didn't Winwin and Kun also arrive at SM on the same day?

Clapping is the theme of this episode ;)

OMG how old is that video? Winwin and Kun look sooo young

Hendery continuing the 'I love Kwangya' propaganda

Xiaojun and Haechan share secrets!!!!! I love that they're buddies now <3 <3 <3

Xiaojun officially apology for not shaving his pits ToT

This is news to me, Ten is not very savvy lol

Corporate shill

Ten @ Jonathan: You're the best MC I've ever seen Jonathan: There's another MC behind you Xiaojun: It's fine

#screencaps & commentaries #the kstar next door #jonathan thona yiombi #nct #wayv

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loopy777 · 1 year ago

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So yeah, interesting commercials with the Dragon Ball cast. Several deal with Gohan (Later Gohan, Trunks and Goten) having eye troubles after swimming cause their Saiyan heritage doesn't negate the need to use drops. Several US commercials involve Ford Fusion and a Japanese one during the time of Battle of the Gods where the Dragon Team shill.... I mean share their love of KFC.

Still not the most bizarre collab ad I've seen for KFC. (I have a print copy of #1, incidentally. Don't worry, I didn't pay money for it.)

The eyedrops one is the weirdest of all these to me, though. I've never heard of needing eyedrops after swimming, never mind it being big enough to do an ad campaign with Dragonball. Unless that was the point, it was a brand new idea no one would have given time of day to without a big character to draw attention to it?

But it's the car commercials absolutely make the most sense to me. Ever since I saw He-Man and the Ninja Turtles selling cars, I realized my generation ruined the world. Why not have our childhood toys sell us cheap cars in our middle age? It makes perfect sense that we still make buying decisions like we're 8 years old, despite having 8-year-old offspring ourselves. (Or, at least, most of us. I missed that memo.)

#antiyonder

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birdantlers · 3 years ago

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I can't believe Piccolo hit his mid life crisis, turned yellow, bought some uggs, and built a summerhome in the middle of nowhere with a mailbox that will literally Never be used what a king

#yes this is canon evidently hdjdhsjsj #I'm really going to shill out 12 dollars for a movie ticket next year just to see what kind of gamer chair piccolo owns #Now all he needs is a kid c'mon toriyama #dbz #dragon ball z #dbs #dragon ball super #dragon ball super: super hero #dbssh #dbs movie #piccolo #piccolo dbz #skit yells

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duhragonball · 3 years ago

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Totally Not Mark

youtube

I think the TNM situation is pretty widely known by now. I only recently learned just how popular the guy is, but I’m not big into the YouTube scene. However, I do keep an eye on Twitter, and something Mark said in this video kicked off a controversy there.

First off, while the above video recaps the situation pretty well, I’ll go over it here: TNM produces video commentaries and reviews on various anime properties, including Dragon Ball. Late last year, Toei tried to have 150 of his videos taken down from YouTube, citing copyright infringement. Mark argued passionately that the footage in his videos was covered by fair use laws, but Toei simply didn’t care, and YouTube was unresponsive to his plight. Demoralized by the situation, Mark took some time off to figure out what to do next, and then YouTube finally stepped in and did the right thing.

As it turns out, Toei actually broke the rules by trying to take these videos down without proper justification, and when pressed to provide a rationale for their takedown request, they just... didn’t? I won’t get into the legal details here, but my understanding is that while Japanese copyright law is much stricter than in other countries, it can’t be applied outside of Japan. So YouTube finally settled the issue by fixing it so Mark’s videos will be available everywhere except Japan, which suits Mark fine, since he doesn’t have an audience there anyway. The only real question is why YouTube didn’t implement something like this for everybody years ago.

It’s a real victory for the little guy, and I’m genuinely surprised and pleased to hear that he won, because I was all set to write a much more depressing take on his situation, basically amounting to “What did you expect?” It seems like YouTube makes life difficult for its content creators at every turn, and Toei doesn’t respect its foreign fanbase at all, so I didn’t think Mark would ever get this far.

But that’s not what I’m here to talk about. I’m looking to address what Mark said that got Twitter all riled up. At 9:09, he says: “And look, this is just my opinion, but I genuinely believe that had it not been for Team Four Star and their Dragon Ball Z Abridged Series, Dragon Ball wouldn’t have remained nearly as popular in the Western World during the time where not much new content surrounding the property was being released.”

I transcribed this excerpt, mainly because one of the rallying cries on Twitter is that no one in the DBZ fandom can read or listen, so this is my attempt to have a good faith discussion here. I had to rewatch that twelve seconds of the video several times to make sure I transcribed it right, so I am very clear on what the man said, okay?

Also, to provide some context, Mark’s point was that Toei would be better off embracing fan works instead of trying to bully them by abusing YouTube’s copyright takedown system. I agree with that point entirely, however, I think his chosen example gives Team Four Star more credit than they’re due. More under the cut.

From what I could see on Twitter, Mark’s statement was clipped and tweeted by a guy who simply captioned it as “Shit opinion”, which sort of polarized anybody who might have agreed or disagreed with it. I don’t agree with what Mark said, but it’s hardly a “shit” opinion. In any event, the whole thing boiled down to two camps:

1) People who like Team Four Star, who were introduced to Dragon Ball through their Abridged series, and are pretty sore at Toei for all their bullying tactics.

2) People who find TFS overrated, who already liked Dragon Ball just fine, and think Mark was just shilling for his pals.

I kind of want to straddle the fence here, because I’m old enough to remember at time when DBZ was red hot in the early 2000′s, and then there wasn’t a whole lot of new stuff to enjoy, and then I discovered DBZA in 2010, and it was heartwarming to see such a popular fan project bringing so many fans together.

But, as much as I enjoy DBZA, I don’t think TFS “saved” the Dragon Ball franchise, or anything like that. To be sure, Mark never said that TFS “saved’ the franchise, but that’s kind of what everyone on Twitter was arguing about. Was there a “drought” in official DB content? When was that drought? How long did it last? Was it even a problem? And if it was a problem, did DBZA fix it? The people in Camp 2 say no, that’s absurd.

The people in Camp 1 seemed to harp on the exact words Mark used. “[Without DBZA] Dragon Ball wouldn’t have remained nearly as popular in the Western World during the time...” There’s a lot of qualifiers there to unpack, though.

First of all, “nearly as popular”, what is that? How much popularity would DB have lost in the early 2010′s, and how much of that popularity did TFS recover for them? I don’t think there’s any way to measure that. This is why the debaters were so passionate, because all they could really do was point to the viewer counts on the DBZA videos, and talk about their own personal experiences with DBZA. Except personal experiences are singular, and viewer counts can’t tell us how many of those people were already die-hard fans before TFS was founded.

The talking point I saw from Camp 1 was this: “Look, he’s not saying Abridged saved Dragon Ball, he just said that it lost a little of its popularity, and Abridged helped them get most of that loss back.“ Which is perhaps a fair statement, but it’s also so mild that it defeats Mark’s original point: that Toei could be more successful by working with fan creators instead of against them. If DBZA’s contribution was negligible, then it’s all academic.

What about “The Western World”? Another important qualifier, as Dragon Ball never stopped being a big deal in Japan, Latin America, and other parts of the world. Dragon Ball Z Abridged was made in the U.S.A., and the whole thing is in English, so it probably doesn’t have much penetration outside of the Anglosphere. Except I’m pretty sure the “Western World” is bigger than just the parts of it that speak English.

Again, I feel like Mark was trying to talk up the success of DBZA, but he didn’t want to exaggerate his case, so he had to put a few disclaimers on the statement, even as he was making it. Like, okay there’s a passionate fanbase in Latin America that has nothing to do with Team Four Star, but you still have to give them credit for keeping the flame alive in these other countries. Fine, but that’s still kind of a mild statement, once you stop to interpret it that way. Oh, and it’s not that they kept the flame alive, it just wouldn’t have been nearly as hot otherwise. Okay.

Finally, let’s talk about “during the time where not much new content surrounding the property was being released” For simplicity’s sake, I’m going to refer to this as “the drought”. Of the three, I feel most qualified to speak on this, because I lived “the drought”. I wasn’t a kid, either. I was in my 20′s and early 30′s. I know the period fairly well.

Okay, so one of the side-arguments on Twitter concerned exactly when the drought was. Dragon Ball GT ended in 1997, and Battle of Gods premiered in 2013. The only DB material I know of that came out in between was the Yo! Son Goku special in 2008, Dragon Ball: Evolution in 2009, and Episode of Bardock in 2011. There was some sot of One-Piece crossover too, but I don’t know much about that.

However, those dates only concern Japan. In the “Western World”, Dragon Ball was airing on Cartoon Network in the 2000′s. I’m pretty sure the dub of GT finished up on Cartoon Network in 2005. After that, fans pretty much just had the video games. I believe that was around the time the Budokai Tenkaichi series was in full swing, followed by Raging Blast 1 and 2. And Dragon Ball: Evolution was in theaters if anyone cared to watch it. I remember watching the Yo! Son Goku special from Shonen Jump’s website in 2008.

Strictly speaking, you can say The Drought in the “Western” fandom spanned 2005 to the U.S. release of Battle of Gods in 2014. But I’m not too sure about that, because you’ve got Dragon Ball Kai showing up from 2009 to 2011 in Japan. In the U.S., Kai was localized as Dragon Ball Z Kai and aired on Nickelodeon from 2010 to 2013.

So the timeline of The Drought looks something like this:

2005: GT dub finale

2006: DBZ Movies 12 and 13 released in the U.S.

2007: Not much

2008: The Yo! Son Goku special. Dragon Ball Z Abridged begins.

2009: Dragon Ball: Evolution

2010-2013: Dragon Ball Z Kai premiers on Nickelodeon

2014: Battle of Gods premiers in U.S. theaters.

2015-2018: Dragon Ball Super anime available on Crunchyroll.

So you definitely have a strong case for a drought in 2005-2009. I say this because GT sucked and by 2005 I could no longer deny it. Movies 12 and 13 are my favorites, but I’d already downloaded the Japanese dubs by then because I couldn’t wait for them to come out. And the special in ‘08 and DBE weren’t much to speak of. DBZA episodes were available in ‘08 and ‘09, but I wasn’t aware of it. And Kai never meant much to me, because they adapted stories I had already seen in Z. But I know a lot of younger fans point to Kai on Nickelodeon as what got them into the fandom, so I have to respect that.

For my part, ‘05 to ‘13 never felt like too much of a dry spell. This is partly because I never seriously expected Dragon Ball to come back. Some things just end, and I find it odd how modern fans seem to think that the franchise must continue no matter what. Hey, that’d be great if it did, but there’s no guarantees here. In any case, I spent those years collecting my DVDs and manga so I could rewatch everything, and I played the hell out of all those video games. And in 2012, I started this blog.

I think part of the argument is that The Drought lasted from ‘05 to ‘13 because the games and Kai simply don’t count. Okay, to each his own, but if certain media doesn’t count as content, then why should we count unofficial works like DBZA as things that helped the franchise? It just feels like a circular argument, completely subjective. At least when Toei released Kai and the video games, they made money off of those things.

And that’s really the issue I have with Mark’s statement. It’s entirely up to Toriyama and Toei to decide how much content they want to produce, and when to release it. If they didn’t feel like doing much in ‘07, that’s their call. I’m sure they made less money off Dragon Ball that year, but that’s their business. If they want to let the franchise end and the fandom slowly wanes to nothing, that’s fine too. Mark makes it sound like someone needed to make something about Dragon Ball in 2008, and TFS stepped up to fulfill that obligation. But no, the obligation never existed.

I’ve seen Totally Not Mark kind of stray into this logic before, that rights holders should be grateful to fan creators for keeping their properties on the map. I don’t think he’s ever quite said it in so many words, but he circles around it once in a while. To be clear, I believe he’s well within his rights to make videos about copyrighted works, but sometimes I think he overestimates the importance of that contribution. His audience loves his stuff, and that’s a wonderful thing, but Toei’s under no obligation to like what he does. They don’t have to consider it free publicity if they don’t see it that way.

That’s not to say Team Four Star doesn’t deserve some credit. I think they made a big impact on the fandom with their work, and they’ve got a lot of talented people in their outfit. I’ve been supporting them on Patreon for years. They got me through some tough times, and I’m grateful for that. I think a lot of people in Camp 2 were only arguing that Mark was wrong because they just hate TFS for the “Bad Dad” memes it spawned, but that’s just as reductive as suggesting their YouTube show saved a best-selling cartoon franchise.

Anyway, that’s my spiel, and it was just too long to fit into a Twitter thread, so I’m putting it here. Good night, everybody.

#dragon ball #team four star #dbz abridged #totally not mark #ask me about the star wars drought of '83 to '91

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jumbopc · 7 years ago

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I finally made a commissions card! If you want more info about this, DM me here or on twitter, or send me an email: [email protected]

Reblogs are SUPER appreciated. Thanks!

#commissions #comission #shill #shilling #fanart #raven #android 21 #jolyne kujo #jolyne cujoh #dragon ball fighterz #JoJo's Bizarre Adventure #teen titans

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i-will-physically-fight-you · 3 years ago

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Here Be Dragons (Temp Title), Sequel Multi-Chapter fic to the oneshot Fallen Angel. Here's one of my favorite excerpts from it:

It was a simple shell game. The man had three cups and one coin. He’d place the coin under one cup and then shuffle the cups around. The guesser then had to guess which cup the coin was under. If they were wrong, they were out of their money. If they were right, they kept their money plus what amount that the man promised to match.

Not that any of the three were for want of wealth. Virgil lived off whatever the peasants could pay in return of his potions and healing spells. Produce, fresh meat and herbs, mostly, but there was the occasional shilling. Patton was a free spirit—as long as he had a roof over his head, and food to eat, he was happy. Roman, of course, was a noble. Perhaps not the wealthiest in the kingdom, but he was far from destitute.

Patton went first. He bounced on the balls of his feet as he watched the shells attentively. The man’s hands flew as he moved the shells around. At last, he came to a stop and glanced up at Patton.

“Well?”

“Hmm,” Patton hummed, pointing at middle cup, “Is this the right one?”

The man flipped the cup over—no coin.

“Better luck next time.” He chuckled.

“Aw darn. Do you guys want a try?” Patton asked, turning back at Virgil and Roman.

“I’ll go next!” Roman proclaimed, placing a coin down on the counter.

Roman fared better than Patton. He won his first two tries, something that only stroked Roman’s ego and pushed him to keep playing. It wasn’t until he tripled his bet that he finally lost. Virgil narrowed his eyes at that.

“Virgil, your turn?” Roman gave a flourish towards the stand.

He rolled his eyes at the Lord before stepping up.

“Can I hold the coin for a moment?” He asked the man, holding his hand out.

He’d feared it might’ve been too weird of a request. But the man laughed and acted like it wasn’t the first time someone’s asked him that question.

“See for yourself—I promise it’s not enchanted in any way. I’m sure a mage like yourself would be able to tell otherwise.” He said, winking as he dropped the coin into Virgil’s palm.

The mage ran his fingers against the glossy surface of the coin. The man was right—the coin was not enchanted in any way. It was just as it appeared to be—an ordinary shilling depicting the King’s portrait. He silently handed the coin back to the man and placed a coin of his own onto the table.

The man made a show of placing the game coin back underneath a cup and started the game. Virgil observed the cups, watching how the cup on his right moved to left, to right, to middle, to left and back to right again before standing stationary.

“Well?” The man asked, “what’s your guess?”

Virgil observed the cups, making an internal deliberation.

“The sleeves of your tunic.”

“W—what?” The man’s face paled.

“The sleeves of your tunic,” Virgil repeated, staring at him, “it’s not underneath any of the cups at all.”

“I can assure you, sir that it is—” The man reached a hand towards a cup when Virgil snatched his wrist.

“Allow me.” He said, before turning over the cup—nothing. He did the same to the middle cup, still nothing. The third cup yielded the same results.

Patton let out a gasp. Roman simply clenched his jaw, unhappy to be tricked so easily.

“Listen, a man’s got to make a living—”

“You lied to us,” Patton interrupted, frowning, “that wasn’t nice.”

“I’d appreciate it if you could give my friends a refund.” Virgil growled, but Roman shook his head.

“You can keep it—those coins will not be missed. However, if I find you pulling the same trick on others—I will not be as forgiving.”

Virgil let out a string of ominous but unintelligible words.

“What was that?!” The man shrieked.

“A curse.” Virgil said before walking off.

“Virgil—” Patton cried as he and Roman followed after him.

“Relax, I didn’t actually curse him,” Virgil raised his hands in a placating motion, “I just wanted to scare him, that’s all.”

“How’d did you know?” Roman demanded.

Virgil came to a halt.

“Easy—magic.”

“Magic?” Patton and Roman echoed.

“Not magic-magic,” Virgil said, “Magic as in sleight-of-hand. They can make it look like something really disappeared or they can make you think it’s somewhere than where it actually is. It looks like magic—but it’s not it at all. It’s easy to spot if you know the tricks behind it.”

“That’s how you knew the coin wasn’t in one of the cups,” Patton realized, “Because you knew he was using sleight of hand!”

“Lo—” Virgil’s eyes drifted to the ground, “my brother was obsessed with it back when we were kids. He taught a bit of it to me.”

“Oh gods, I can just picture his reaction.” Roman murmured underneath his breath. Virgil let out a strained guffaw at that.

“C’mon, let’s check out the other games and hope they’re not as corrupt.” Virgil muttered as he briskly walked away.

#kat answers

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elexica · 4 years ago

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Give & Toke

https://archiveofourown.org/works/27069568

Happy 4/20 Yugihoes,

Please accept a humble posting of my puppyshipping/violetshipping weedfic.

Joey showed up at Kaiba's shiny new dispensary for the sole purpose of kicking Kaiba's ass.

It does not go as planned.

A gift for @sky-kaijou / @sky-kaijou-writes in honor of the 2020 New Zealand Cannabis Reefer-endum. TW: Marijuana use and sale.

Title by @auroraXborealis <3 For the Professional Rivals prompt of AU-Gust. . . . (context for this fic) Marijuana is decriminalized currently in Domino City, and stores can be licensed through a regulatory scheme similar to that of California.

Full story under the cut

Joey stomped into the new cannabis shop in the neighborhood. It looked like an Apple store: white walls, smooth white tables, iPads and clerks in matching polos. Gentrification had taken his neighborhood by storm, spinning the older apartment complexes into glamorous condos, replacing the older styled homes with sleek modern imitations, and leaving everyone who couldn’t keep up forced to either move away or to the streets.

Joey’s own rent was soaring, and so was his bitterness towards the invaders to his territory. And especially this cursed-ass pot shop. The shiny new dispensary hadn’t made a terrible dent in his sales, but he couldn’t keep up with the variety, the quality, or the convenience.

It was a travesty to his profession, is what it was. Joey had been dealing for years—he’d never gotten an allowance from his father and passing a little pot along had made up the difference. Once he graduated high school, it morphed into something of a full-time gig. That hadn’t been his intention. It wasn’t like he was trying to move up the distribution ladder or become the next gang lord. But he’d built a good network, and in an industry that ran on relationships and reputation, it was really going pretty well for him.

And this bastard had the gall to move into his territory! Sell his soulless, corporate product to his loyal customers. With this robotic, inhuman, unfeeling mockery of everything that weed is.

Joey spotted a mustachioed blue-polo wearing corporate shill and waved him over. “I’m here ta talk ta yer manager. Give him ‘a piece of my mind.”

“If you intend to make threats against Mr. Kaiba in some sort of gang turf nonsense, you have no idea the true power that you are—” the goon responded, placid energy souring. Joey’s fists clenched tighter, body preparing for a fight.

“I’m not sure a piece of your mind would get you very far.” While Joey was attempting to intimidate the soulless bud-tender, a tall brunet in a white suit with a light blue oxford shirt had stalked up behind him and interrupted.

Joey spun on the toe of his well-worn red Nike’s. “An’ who do ya think you are?”

The brunet crossed his arms over his chest. “Seto Kaiba, the license-holder for this establishment.”

Joey nervously ran a hand through his messy blond hair. He hadn’t expected the shop owner to be so young. Or attractive. All of his fight drained from him. In Joey’s decade of experience, rival dealers were rarely so… professional and polished. Joey felt instantly underdressed in his varsity jacket and jeans.

“Uh… well, yer in territory that doesn’t belong ta ya!” Joey stammered.

“Is that so? I assure you, I have all required state and local permits,” Kaiba answered, blue eyes narrowing. The taller man let a stray glance to Joey’s old, green Jansport backpack. “Perhaps if you had a better view of my inventory, we could have a more amiable business relationship. I’m not trying to alienate everyone in my industry.”

It was insane, the way the taller man could knock the fight out of him without even trying. Joey had never considered that his enemy would possibly seek to de-escalate the situation. Joey nodded and followed the taller man to the back, hypnotized. He maybe shouldn’t have smoked a bowl before raiding the enemy facility.

Inside an equally pristine office, Kaiba lit a pre-rolled joint and took a long inhale. He passed it across the desk, the rolling papers poised delicately between his forefinger and middle finger.

Joey accepted the joint and took a hit. After an impressive pause, Kaiba released smoke rings from his lips slowly, in that perfect practiced way. The smoke dissipated softly, fading from tight circles and clouding the air. With no windows in the room, it seemed that his intent was to hot box it. Joey wondered idly how the white marble of the desk was so free from dust or ash if Kaiba took to smoking here.

Joey passed back the joint before releasing his breath in a round of hacking coughs.

While Joey was gasping for air and trying to gather his bearings, Kaiba produced a glass of water and a plain white ashtray. He gently rested the joint on the edge.

“That was a proprietary strain—Blue Eyes White Dragon. It’s Sativa. I’m working on a hybrid model that has a significantly greater THC content. But the current Blue Eyes plant has the highest percentage of CBD for Sativa plants currently on the market in Domino. Thoughts?” Kaiba unbuttoned his white blazer.

Joey’s eyes watered, and he managed to take a few sips from the glass. “It tastes… unique. Kinda minty?”

Kaiba nodded, raising the joint to take another hit.

“So, y’know, I came here to talk about ya encroaching on my business. I’ve built up a book ‘a business in this part ‘a Domino, and I’m not gonna give up that easy!” Joey said, straightening his shoulders. He couldn’t tell if he was sitting up properly. The world was already starting to feel a little warmer, fuzzier. His forehead sort of tingled like he had a third eye.

Once again, Kaiba blew out a series of flawless rings, staring into space. The blue irises of his eyes were framed by smoke-induced redness. “Yes, well, I have no intention of cowing to any threats. I took this corrupt pharmaceutical company from my dead father, and I am turning it into something that can actually improve people’s lives. And no puny street punk will stand in my way.”

“Oof. Sorry for ya loss.” Joey elected to ignore the last comment, as a gentleman. And because, for the first time, he spotted a white holster tucked under the newly opened sport jacket.

“Don’t be, he was a bastard,” Kaiba said with a satisfied smirk.

Joey laughed at the insinuation. He might’ve had more to say, under other circumstances, but Kaiba had shared the good shit. Instead, the room felt a few degrees warmer than when he had entered and he removed his letterman jacket, revealing his toned biceps.

Kaiba was constructing another round of rings when his eyes met Joey’s sculpted arms. His focus was completely dashed, and he ended up exhaling the rest of the smoke from his nose, like a dragon.

“Ha, ya see something ya like, rich boy?” Joey said with a signature grin, picking up the joint again. It was already almost half-way spent.

Kaiba looked away dismissively. “Irrelevant. Mr. Wheeler, it was a matter of time before you paid my enterprise a visit. As you have most likely noticed, there are certain elements of the trade in which I excel. I am a gifted scientist, an expert businessman, and—”

“A robot? You’ve had double the hits I have and ya won’t even crack a smile! I dunno what yer tolerance has ta be, but ya ain’t human anymore.”

Kaiba rolled his eyes, tapping the joint against the ash tray to release some of the built-up cinders. “There is a certain social element to this business that I have no interest in participating in.”

Joey leaned over a little in his chair. “Is that so?” He meant to have an interrogator’s pose and expression, but he was worried he just looked high as balls.

Kaiba passed the still burning joint across the table, little red ember barely emanating light in the bright white office.

“I would like to absorb your book of business and employ you as a bud-tender.”

Joey rejected the joint and cracked his knuckles, knowing that the action flexed his arm muscles. An almost-imperceptible blush flashed across Kaiba’s cheeks. “I’ve been my own boss, mostly, for a little while now. Why should I be a glorified store clerk for ya?”

“You can’t possibly see this career continuing to serve you indefinitely. You’ll need to go legit or go to jail.” Kaiba lazily released one more puff of smoke before butting the joint. “But, I am amenable to other arrangements. What do you propose?”

Joey smiled at the suggestion. “Partner. It doesn’t haveta be fifty-fifty or anything, but I’ve built somethin’ up, and I know what I’m worth. I gotta be making at least five g’s a month.”

Kaiba finally broke. He laughed almost hysterically at the suggestion, doubling over and taking a full minute to get his breathing to settle. “Yeah, ok. That would be, maybe, a five percent share of the retail business.”

Joey stretched, resting his arms behind his head, giving Kaiba an eyeful of his tight white t-shirt and strong pectorals underneath. “Ten percent of the retail company.”

Kaiba nodded, picked up his phone and typed away. “The contract will be prepared presently.”

“Neato,” Joey said with a lecherous smile. Everything felt soft, warm, comfortable—even if the room looked so sterile it could be used for a surgery. “Now, what should we do with this time?”

Kaiba shifted in his seat and adjusted his light blue tie.

Joey leaned forward, planting an elbow on the desk. “I got some ideas I think you’ll like, partner…”

Kaiba leaned over the desk as well, a small smile budding on his lips. “Oh, already?”

“Yeah. In this business, yer supposed to seal a contract with a kiss.”

“I do not think that’s custom—”

Joey closed the remaining distance and captured his lips in a searing kiss. Kaiba relaxed into the kiss almost instantly. It was softer than Joey had expected. Sweet and hot, with the flavors of mint, smoke, and cannabis on his partner’s lips.

Joey only broke it to walk over and climb into the brunet’s lap.

The contract was respectfully slid under the door.

FIN

#seto kaiba #Kaiba Seto #Jounouchi Katsuya #Joey Wheeler #puppyshipping #Violetshipping #my fic #crossposted on ao3 #tw: drug use #tw: marijuana use

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honestsycrets · 5 years ago

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His Saxon Whore

❛ pairing | Hvitserk x Saxon Whore!reader

❛ type | oneshot

❛ summary | having grown up in a world where there are no brothels, he finds them a mystery when he meets her in york. he comes to see her-- but its not always about sex.

❛ warnings | prostitute!reader, vikings/saxons, slightly rude!hvitserk, mother whoring out daughter

❛ sy’s notes | if i left out a tag, i’m sorry.

They all told him his dick would fall off.

But he didn’t really care.

There were no brothels at home. Thralls? Yes. Plenty and plenty of warm pussies he could buy. But nothing was cheaper, and more worth his coin, than the little brothel he came upon in York one day. Quivering little bodies who explained, quite willingly, that they were meant for the sort of work Hvitserk came to take them for.

So yanking her leg out really wasn’t necessary. But as he found out, she preferred a man that knew what she liked. Not politely giving coin but, deliciously being chucked over his shoulder and swept off like a man from raid coming home. And really... that’s what this was.

“Who you here to see this time, sweetheart?”

Hvitserk’s eyes scan over the woman, whose sloppy skirts are picked up over the spider veins that run up her shapely legs. She’s seen him before, no doubt. The woman has a tendency to pick on men she deems as worthy targets. Baby boys looking for a mommie. But he’s never had mommie problems-- or, none that he couldn’t handle.

He turns his head from her small, meager little hut toward a thatched roof with soft planks of wood to support it. It bore an iron door. Mainly because after his last visit, he claimed that the do. It opens and a farmer skitters out hiding his face as he goes. Likely didn’t want to tell his misses the shillings he burned.

“(Y/N), like usual.”

Hvitserk says to the pimp whose husband was busy with other duties. She looks him up and down, the cloak over his head obscuring his eyes and the worth of his sword. She could likely charge a fair and healthy price-- fifteen shillings, maybe even twenty for a prince like him. But one look and she knew who he was, a vikingr and dangerous territory.

“Five shillings then,” she says. “My girl will treat you good again. Best one I bore.”

“Twenty for the night.” Hvitserk drops the shillings in her hand. She stands aside to allow him to duck into the home. This space you shared with your other sisters is far from private. It’s barely sectioned off into three different rooms by modest curtains. You sat in your section wiping down the wooden bed. Then after cleaning yourself, you chuck the cloth into a bucket of cool water.

Hvitserk draws the curtains shut.

“Princess,” he draws out your fitting title.

You sit more properly when you hear that heavy accent. A Vikingr, sure, but your Vikingr to be correct. The red veil you meant to wear is sloppily thrown on the ground.

“Oh!” you laugh, “I’m hardly decent.”

“I’ve been waiting,” Hvitserk lurches forward, tipping you back upon the bed. You reach out and pull the cloak off his honey brown hair, skidding your hands over his shoulders and tightening there as he devours your neck in soft kisses unlike the attention given by other men. With no clothes on, his greedy hand palms over your flesh. The mop of his long brown hair trails lower then, forcing you to keep in place with a firm hand forming a collar around your neck.

He brings his other hand around your breast and opens his mouth around your nipple. His mouth closes over the delicate flesh there, suckling your nipple with soft force. Then tugs slightly as to hear you cry out. Hvitserk tweaks your nipple as he pulls off. Catching your eyes, his hand migrates lower over the expanse of your stomach toward wiry curls hiding your well-abused pussy.

You reach out, tightening over his shoulder, and stop him. “It’s not decent.”

You’re an illiterate prostitute whose cunt at this point probably reflected the amount of soiling done to it, but he feels little seed there when he pushes his fingers in. Just a smooth silkiness to your well used walls. While ignoring you, he stretches you open around his fingers. In your protest, you shut your legs as well as you can.

“I have enough coin to do what I want,” he says. It sounds acrid off his tongue-- and yet, well intentioned. “Open your legs.”

You cautiously obey him, opening so that he might see. Hvitserk slides down, spreading your lips apart in order to thrust his fingers smoothly. As much as you don’t want him to, his tongue soothes the motion along your lips. Almost making you excited-- but when he pulls his fingers clean, its almost as if he’s checking a well baked cake for batter. He smoothes the blood over the forest green sleeve of his tunic.

“You’re torn,” he observes, almost wounded.

“It’s typical.”

Not typical for him to press on when his woman was in pain. At least not his free women. Hvitserk shoves your legs together and climbs back up to lay beside you. You savour his arm sneaking behind your back, pulling you in.

“The men. They are big here?” Hvitserk asks, curious if it was overuse, roughness, or perhaps your lack of excitement that drove you to tear.

You snort. “If only. They’re short, stupid and-- annoying. They come here to whine about their wives or of King Alfred while being good, wholesome Christians.”

“That sounds right.” Hvitserk laughs as you reach for your dinner. A simple dinner of roasted deer and bread. It became obvious that he wasn’t going to force sex tonight. Your sore pussy was glad for it… though, you did miss him.

“Aescwine though,” you jerk your head to the side. A man that had been waiting patiently for his attention. “He enjoys it when I stand on his dick and beat his balls.”

“Oh-- ahh! Why would he do that?”

Hvitserk reaches down, cupping his hand on top of his privates. You laugh at his expense. It’s almost too cute the way he immediately assumes he’s next. You’ve not done it to anyone else. You take a bite of the leg and lead it up against his lips. “Some men like it. You could--”

“No,” Hvitserk takes a bite, shifting back to set his arm around you. He lays down with his eyes closed and you wonder how comfortable his armour was to sleep in. You turn over against him, walking two fingers over the scruff of his jaw.

“What are you thinking?” you ask.

“‘Bout you.” He answers. “How you never get pregnant.”

“I do,” you explain. “That’s what the pennyroyal is for.”

Then-- nothing.

Hvitserk takes some time to think on it. He’s asked you before how you came into this profession. Family business, you said. But a family business where your father and mother pimped their daughters out? Doesn’t seem right to him. But, again, Anglo-Saxon women weren’t free. They belonged to the men in the family more so than Norsemen.

It’s a great headache.

“You wanna learn to read again?”

And you smile behind greasy, roasted meat when he reaches back into his cloak, fetching the tablet and a small utensil used to scratch upon it.

“I’ve probably forgotten,” you smile. Hvitserk flips the tablet, offering it out to you. It’s his own language, but sometimes...

“So have I.”

“You’re so stupid,” you tease. But dropping your meat, you bring the tablet onto your lap and skim over what letters were already there. For a moment he admires the glitter in your eyes-- the delight you take in language. Even when you tear it apart.

“Ivar says that all the time.”

@igetcarriedawaywithyou, @kylobien, @titty-teetee, @breathlessouls, @nejijjeoroo, @bcat1291, @readsalot73, @mslothbrok, @captstefanbrandt, @ailucascen, @michaeliskindahot, @cbouvier23, @naaladareia, @cbouvier23, @the-geeky-engineer, @lisinfleur, @tephi101, @akamaiden, @ethereallysimple, @venusloviing, @happylittlepuppydog, @beyond-the-ashes, @slutforrpg, @sparklemichele, @alicedopey, @lif3snotouttogetyou, @noregretsandyeteveryregret, @dangerous-like-a-loaded-pistol, @deathbyarabbit, @unacceptabletatertots, @beyond-the-ashes (no sig), @babypink224221, @ivarandersen, @queen-see-ya-in-valhalla, @moose-squirrel-asstiel, @end-of-night, @gruffle1, @lol-haha-joke @arses21434, @smileyparrots, @miss-artemis-wild, @two-unbeatable-beaters, @wonderwoman292, @wish-i-was-a-mermaid, @killerb00sdeath, @heartbeats-wildly, @boo20017, @acacheofstrange, @shaelyn102, @smokealone, @shaelyn102 @laketaj24, @peaceisadirtyword, @ly–canthrope @cris101071 @daughterofthenight117 @unassumingviking @ladyofsoa, @inforapound @winchesterwife27 @feyrearcheron44@readsalot73 @squirrelacorngliterfarts @gold-dragon-slayer @medievalfangirl

#hvitserk x reader #hvitserk/reader #hvitty x reader #hvitserk imagines #hvitserk's heathen feast #vikings imagines #viking imagines #vikings/reader #vikings x reader #vikings imagine #hvitserk imagine

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smokeybrand · 4 years ago

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Breaking the Rules

So the Snyder Cut finally dropped. Four hours of Snyderisms like slow-mo, dumb kinetic camera work, and relentless edge. Now, I'm a card-carrying Marvel shill. Been real transparent about it for years. Marvel is my sh*t and Spider-Man is my favorite superhero. That said, i do like DC. I always give them a fair shake. Hell, my favorite capeflick is The Dark Knight. I even like Watchmen and that was a slog to get through. I’ve seen every film in the DCEU and they have left me wanting. A lot of DC heads write off my opinion because of my Marvel bias but let’s be serious; The DCEU is inferior to the MCU in almost every way. As it is, the DCEU needs to be better. It needs better storytellers. It needs a better plan. It needs a Feige. Snyder is not that dude and i don’t think Wan is either. I think WB and ATT have to figure out a way to coalesce this sh*t because it’s all wonky, especially now that we have this Snyder Cut. I’ve already reviewed a Justice League before so all of the observations i made about performances in that, stand. This is more what i think this version does better and worse.

The Better

This opening is much better and makes more sense. That Super Death Wail as the principal genesis of Steppenwolf’s conflict, the thing that wakes that first Motherbox, makes way more sense that whatever the f*ck Whedon did.

This thing definitely looks so much more gorgeous that that first run. Zack Snyder can’t plot a story to save his life but this motherf*cker can compose a shot, for real. Snyder is an idea man, a cat that just wants to make cool looking sh*t, but this ain’t the medium for that. You can have all the beautiful shots in the world but if they are tied together by a shoestring of a narrative, then it’s just polished sh*t, you know?

The extended Aquaman intro was outstanding. Whedon didn’t let this scene breath and, seeing it as it was intended, that was a mistake. Seeing this version of Justice League kind of makes Josstice League in it’s entirety, a mistake. It’s weird that this was cut because it’s so good and shows so much more of Arthur.

Jeremy Iron’s Alfred continues to be my second favorite Alfred after Michael Caine. Sorry, Michael Gough...

Wonder Woman’s first scene in this, the one with the terrorists, is ridiculous. This one scene is a perfect example of the difference between the two versions of this film. Snyder’s is better, if way more brutal than it needed to be. Still, i love the warrior version of Diana so I'm good with this.

Speaking of Amazons, Snyder, apparently, put them in more clothes this time around? I couldn’t really see for sure because of the color correction but it didn’t seem like they weren’t rocking those iron bikinis like in the Whedon cut. I think Joss Whedon might be a bit more problematic than we think. Between the half naked chicks, the way he kept sexualizing Diana, the fact that there are no people of color in his version or the way he shortchanged the entirety of Cyborg’s plot... Breh.

Steppenwolf is SO much more menacing in this version of the movie. Dude feels like a force, like a proper threat an not just some stop-gap for something better. Ol’ Wolfie was a decent antagonist for an initial run at an Avengers-esque team up for the DCEU. Definitely more Loki this time around and less Ultron like the first time.

Also, the Parademons look much more dope. The first time, they looked like fodder. This time, they actual felt like a force, like a horde.

Hey, we got an Atom sighting!

Not a ton of Iris West but enough to wet my appetite. Anytime i get to see Kiersey Clemons in stuff, I'm happy. Having it tied to an outstanding sequence demonstrating Flash’s powers was just icing on the cake. Seriously, Snyder did a great job visualizing Barry’s abilities. That scene where he saved everyone from the debris and then the subtle reversing of time; All of it was dope to see.

Are those Starros that Steppenwolf is using to “interrogate” the cats with Motherbox stink on them? They look like little mechanical Starros. I hope they’re Starros.

Lots of Cyborg stuff. Like, intricate Cyborg stuff. The sh*t Whedon cut of Vic was instrumental to the coherency of this story and dude was just like, “Nah.” It’s no wonder that version of the movie doesn’t make any f*cking sense.

Hey, we got a Spectre sighting! Nice.

The explanation for the Motherboxes and their mcguffin-ness goes a long way to soothing the whole “resurrecting Superman” thing. Snyder basically tells the audience they’re magic boxes that can do anything because of magic-technology. It’s a little ridiculous considering what Motherboxes actually do in the comics but whatever. It makes sense in this universe i guess.

All of the action scenes are better. All of them. Snyder is nothing if not a cat that can actualize a dope punch-out. Dude can’t get out of his own way when telling a story but if you need a fight scene, Snyder is definitely your guy.

Speaking of, that climax was WAY better. It carried far more weight and there were times when the heroes felt like they could lose. There’s an unrelenting tension that grips you hard and doesn’t let up until it finally does. I appreciated this way more than the first one, even if it’s dumb edgy for no reason.

The Worst

Zack still doesn’t understand these characters, man. It’s very apparent to me that a lot of this is just window dressing for kind of a Zack Snyder fan fic version of DC and that’s fine i guess? Sh*t’s not my cup of tea but a great many people seem to like it. Dude’s writing can definitely be tighter and he can skew a little more toward the heart of these characters but i mean, it’s called Zack Snyder’s Justice league for a reason.

The Snyderisms, man, they are all over this thing. Look, i just don’t like how Zack makes movies. Too much style, not enough substance, or rather, not enough focus. He has a ton of great ideas but gets too bogged down in how sh*t looks, or tumbles down his rabbit hole of concept but never expresses any of them clearly enough. Outside of 300 or Dawn of the Dead, this film is probably the most focused I've ever seen Snyder and it’s still kind of all over the place yet, never where it needs to be.

So many plot holes, man. Less than before, but so many threads left untied.

This thing didn’t need to be four hours long. Not even close. There were several shots that i thought could have been cut. Like, that three hour version which got the standing ovation was probably the best version of Justice League and we’ll never see it. This version is definitely better than the theatrical run but f*ck is it long. You really feel that sh*t, too.

Cyborg still looks gross to look at. You’d think they’d try and make his weird, angular, body look a bit better upon the redo but nope. This what we get i guess.

Also, why the f*ck the Atlanteans sound British? Why they make Amber Heard do that accent? She can’t do that accent, man. You’re actually asking a chick who’s professionally pretty to act and she can’t act. She’s just pretty. That actually brings up an interesting question; Is Aquaman canon to this universe because Mera in that doesn’t have an accent and her Pops is still alive. This one has an accent and her parents are dead. Or maybe the accent makes it easier to recast Heard later with a British actress? Maybe the Mother of Dragons really is about to be the Queen of the Seas?

Why is this Knightmare sequence in here? Sure, it was awesome to see, pure fan service, but this is the blue balls of blue balls because we don’t have a movie to follow this one. This is it. This is all the Justice League we’re getting. There is no part two or whatever. Why even hint at something more?

The Verdict

There’s a lot to like about this version of Justice League. It is, hands down, better than Josstice League in almost every way. Sh*t is a better film, man, and should have been what we got to begin with. WB did Snyder a disservice by letting him go and then letting Whedon butcher his movie. I don’t like Snyder’s take on DC. I think it’s try-hard, edgelord, nonsense but it is it’s own thing and i commend him for that. Dude has a vision and I'll never take away from from a creative’s inspiration. That said, this thing was a slog to get through. It’s definitely better than what we got before but it’s still not that great and it’s way too long. Three hours is more than enough to tell this story if you make prudent cuts. Still, I’m glad it exists and, if you’re a fan of this world, a fan of Snyder’s work, you’ll love it. For me, as a cat who has no skin in this game, I'm not all that impressed. Per usual, Snyder has too many ideas and that leaves the plot unfocused and meandering at times. In a genre that is predicated on storytelling, you can’t be a bad storyteller like that and just gloss over it with spectacle. That’s disingenuous. At the end of the day, it was entertaining. It was pretty to see. It was a Snyder film.

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devilbrew-69 · 5 years ago

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I hate mobile games

It's not mobile games as a whole that I hate , but rather, the current trend of them being capitalistic cash cows while having the audacity to pump out mediocre content.

Recently got finished playing two mobile games that I had high hopes for only for that hope to get crushed.

One of them was seven's code. It's a new rhythm game made by naoki Maeda, the producer and composer for many dance dance revolution games. It looked so promising with it's professional art done by BUMBUN( character designer for Yuki Yuna is a hero) and it group of guest artists. It also seemed to be a story heavy game focusing on themes of mystery and cyberpunk, a rarity for rhythm games. I played the first five mission and while they were incredibly easy, it was enough to keep me entertained and the story got better with each progression.

Turns out that the game isn't free at all. It's a trial game. Players have to shill out money to get the complete product and advance the story, something that was not advertised anywhere in it's promotion. This tactic is a much bigger slap in the face than the gacha scheme since it's tricks players into getting invested into what they believe is a free game only to have content that should be free be blocked by a pay wall.

What a waste of potential. Seven's code could've been great if it wasn't blinded by money.

Black clover phantom knights is the other atrocity I endured and unlike seven's code, it was very upfront about it's crap quality. It's an auto battle game where the computer does all the work for you and the only interactive part is choosing when to use your special attack. I don't know who in the 8 cycles of hell thought an auto game would be fun but they need to get bitch slapped like a cheap whore. There's absolutely no point in playing a game where you can't even control the characters and think up of strategies. This is slightly even more disappointing than seven's code since black clover is a fun manga series with epic battles that deserve to be rendered in a nice action game. This game being made by bandai namco was perhaps a sign it would be bad. They have a long of mediocre anime games after all.

It's clear anime mobile games need a lot of work if they want to be taken seriously as a form of entertainment. On the bright side, he's some mobile games that are actually pretty cool and worth your time.

Dragon Ball legends

Fate grand order

Seven deadly sins grand cross ( coming soon)

Mobius final fantasy

Sinoalice( whenever that game finally comes to global)

#Mobile games #black clover #rant #capitalism #do better.

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