#[ *shills dragon ball shills dragon ball* ]
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The following is a non-profit fan-based parody, Dragon Ball, Dragon Ball Z, Dragon Ball GT are owned by FUNimation, Toei Animation, Fuji TV and Akira Toriyama. Home For Infinite Losers is also a non-profit fan-based parody which is made by Team Four Star and animated by DevilArtemis.
Please support the official release!
~~~
After a fatal accident, Yamcha finds himself at King Yemma's desk!⌠unfortunately, after some technical issues ensue, he ends up falling straight into Hell⌠or well, HFIL, actually. Can he survive a full 24 hours so he can be returned to Heaven?
Find out now!
#dragon ball#dragon ball z#dragon ball abridged#dbza#dragon ball z abridged#hfil#home for infinite losers#fanfic#originally this was going to be a reader insert fic#yamcha#obvious yamcha x frieza shilling
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` * â ⥠~ â A BIT OF BACKSTORY . @kaizokugaris ACCEPTING .
      â  A BIT OF MY PAST , HUH ? HMMM . . . â RUBBING his chin in thought for a bit, tail idly hanging behind him- before it would perk up along with his expression, goku snapping his fingers. â lemme tell ya 'bout the first time i ever lost a fight !! oh man does that bring me back. so it was the 21st tenkaichi budokai- biggest martial arts tournament in the whoooole world !! i had made my way to the finals even though it was my first tournament ever !! i had trained real hard for it under my master roshi, an' i was goin' up against 'nother great master called jackie chun ! man did he know his stuff. whalloped with his drunken fist. he had put me ta' sleep by hypnotizing me. an' he hit me with this crazy painful shocking move that really surprised me !! he even knew the kamehameha !! in the end though, he managed to just get me with a kick to the face an' swept the whole tournament from under me !! it was the best fight of my whole life at the time.... an' it taught me that there's always gotta be someone stronger out there. i wonder how jackie chun is doin'.... though he was pretty darn old back then. he might've croaked by now ! hehehe . â
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Had a strange and cynical thought about You and Idol PreCure while in the shower. Not saying this is true, or even likely, and I ainât been keeping up on the conversation or news besides the title so for all I know this is either old news, debunked, or an already common theory.
What if this season is a way for Toei to introduce their own VTuber idol group?
I mean this series is already all about shilling the merch in the most toyetic way possible. So what if the idol themed season is there to make characters that can promote other Toei (and its affiliated companies) products too? The PreCures upload videos of them singing and dancing to theme songs of their other shows. Streams of them playing⌠whatever the latest Dragon Ball game is.
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đ Is there a fanfic or fanfic writer you recommend?
This is my time to shill a few faves actually so I Will:
"Sleeping With Ghosts" is my friend @adrianicsea's Chainshipping fic for the Saw franchise and I cannot recommend it enough tbh, I've drawn a few pieces for it because I love it that much ~
I have a list of long fics I regularly revisit actually, and my favorites on there are:
"When In Rome" by Sevargs (Dragon Ball Z fic)
"Falling Skies" by VivatRex (Supernatural fic)
"The Company You Keep" by Hoverbun (Pathologic fic, this is actually one I commissioned ~)
"How They Met Themselves" by Wheat From Chaff (Borderlands fic)
"Catch Perfect" by Resilicns & ZombieJesus (Death Note fic)
There's others obviously but these are the ones I find myself coming back to when my brains most restless, I've reread Falling Skies pretty much twice yearly since 2015 so that one's probably my actual favorite on this list.
đ Is there a favorite trope you like to write?
ANGST BABEYYY. If you wanna be specific then hurt/comfort and sick fic are my favorites but truly I love writing my faves getting fucked up and then tenderly being cared for or worried over in the aftermath. My bread and butter.
đ What is the most impactful lesson youâve learned about writing?
You Do Not Have To Write Chronologically. The most impactful thing anyone ever taught me about writing because it actually helped me to just Write, no matter if it was the first thing in my story or the last. It fixed my weird hangups about having to do things in the Right order. I just don't operate that way and I don't have to!
#ask game#dont knock the dbz fic til you actually read it if you give it a chance btw#that ones got some of the best characterization in a fic ive ever read#and ive told the author as much lol#basically wrote a novel in their comments after i finished it the first time
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After a solid month I'm finally almost done putting together 4 reprint/collection/I-already-drew-all-the-content-a-long-time-ago-I-just-had-to-make-covers-and-stuff books for convention season (it was originally just gonna be 1 book...) and now it's like,
take a break to relax, recover from burnout, work through my reading pile, practice some life drawing
VS
shill for commissions cus oh my GOD the bill for this 4-book print run (and unfortunately-timed life expenses) is HUGE
VS
force myself (mentally kicking and screaming) to move on to the driving part of adult Driver's Ed before all the information from the classroom part of adult Driver's Ed evaporates from my tiny little brain
VS
get started on an original comic (for the first time in 5 years) while I still have the inspiration of rereading my old work and the deadline of a convention to try and finish it for
VS
revisit that prose story I wrote 2 years ago and do some character designs and illustrations and get that printed up as the quickest-and-easiest way to get a totally-new book done in time for the next convention
VS
revisit the literally 35-page document of Dragon Ball fancomic scripts I wrote a year ago and then was too depressed to draw, because now I've got enormous Toriyama feelings and (absolutely no disrespect intended but this is a fact of life) marketing-wise this seems like the best time to make DB fanmerch
FIGHT
#comic artist problems#if any old friends wanna go on a cross country road trip to hang out with me as my reward for hard work I'd be very into that
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![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/66874507ea5cc5c7557554b4585ba4ff/64c9fe93e559b007-75/s540x810/00b82ffc3f7bee1c9feed62aca2c53a3e75db5c4.jpg)
Image description: a set of 7 polyhedral dice used for Dungeons & Dragons in a line on top of a closed laptop covered in artistic stickers. The dice are made of blue-and-white plastic. They are lined up in order (from left to right): d4 (tetrahedron); d6 (cube); d8 (octahedron); two d10s (decahedron, specifically pentagonal trapezohedron), one numbered with digits 0 to 9 and the other numbered 00 to 90; one d12 (dodecahedron); one d20 (icosahedron). In the middle background is a lacquered box with a pattern of flowers. <end image description>
I kinda impulse-bought this dice set a little while ago because I thought they looked pretty XD I don't anticipate being able to use them for D&D any time soon, but they make for nice little fidget things, and it's fun to puzzle out the number placement rules for each different shape:
d4: If the number on the upward point is odd, the others run around the base clockwise in ascending order; if the upward-pointing number is even, the other numbers run around the base anti-clockwise in ascending order.
d6: Numbers on opposite faces add up to seven.
d8: If a number is odd, the next number in the sequence appears on the opposite face; 3 and 7 appear to the right of 2 and 6 respectively, while 5 appears to the left of 4.
d10: Odd-numbered faces cluster around one narrow point on the 'top' of the die, while even-numbered faces cluster around the narrow point on the 'bottom'; opposing faces add up to 9 or 90, depending on the specific d10.
d12: Opposite faces add up to 13.
d20: Opposite faces add up to 21.
(The lacquered box is just a small ornamental thing from my late grandmother's vast collection of ornaments; it's of a good size to hold all the dice, with room to spare, and the lid fits well.)
As part of the good-fidget thing mentioned above, these dice are kinda fun to use for small sleight-of-hand things, like this shilling-and-farthing trick:
(I bet you were wondering where the Good Omens reference would come in, huh? :P Always good to have some adorable angelic enthusiasm around!)
I use the d4 and d20, because they're about as visually distinct as a shilling and a farthing would be. The necessary hand movements for a discreet palming of the 'disappearing' die are different, too, because a lump of bright blue-and-white plastic is a lot easier to see from a distance than a comparatively dull-coloured coin. Still working on that bit! (Got it halfway worked out; it's possible to use the ball of the thumb and the opposing edge of the hand to 'hold on' to something like a d20 without seeming to, and discreetly holding a corner of a d4 between one's fingers is easy enough)
There's also a part of my brain that keeps saying 'THEY LOOK LIKE SWEETIES PUT ONE IN YOUR MOUTH!' and I have to keep reminding it that my age is measured in years, not months... Ehehehe
#dice#dnd dice#polyhedral dice#rpg dice#polyhedra#geometry#sleight of hand#good omens#aziraphale#cutie pie#rambling
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WayV on the Kstar next door!!!!!!
LMAO Winwin doing "oh yeah come on in!" while pressing the 'close door' buttons thing XD
LOL Jonathan and the KStar next door completed the NCT Dragon ball by inviting all the NCT subunits (except New Team I guess)
Ten: We're NCT members too!!!!!
OMG with their first question Jonathan made them address why they're a kpop group that performs in places that aren't predominantly Korean and speak English XD So much for there not being any hard questions lol
Hendery talking with taxi drivers for half an hour XD He does seem like that kind of guy who can small talk though!
Deep sigh at Love Talk English version lyrics XD
Ten explaining away the lyrics for our innocent child ears
Winwin: What is happening????
LMAO I REMEMBER THIS! Every time Jonathan said that Renjun did something he'd be like "who....me????" like he was being arrested XD
Jonathan: Honestly, I don't know where to look (at Ten) XD
Ten: Sexy is the theme. Ten: That was a joke. Jonathan: It was not a joke.
Jonathan @ Xiaojun: Wipe that smirk off your face Jonathan: *Whips out racy photo of Xiaojun in bed*
Ten said Winwin is good at keeping people on the hook XD XD You heard it here, folks!! Ten said Winwin is PLAYING COY
Omg right Oct 28 is Winwin's birthday <3
Winwin's profile is about him being the most loved of NCT X'D YESSSSSSSSSS
Haechan kissu!!! <3
Xiaojun said that Haechan loves Winwin the most >3
I feel like this is an older post? The crew went deep in their research lol
THE PRESSURE IS ON Jonathan asked Winwin who he liked the most in NCT :P
Winwin said that he likes Haechan because Haechan pulls a lot of pranks and Hendery and Ten just went hold my fucking beer
Winwin said it's because Haechan's not annoying when he pulls a prank but apparently Hendery is super fucking annoying when he pulls a prank lmfao
Xiaojun girl group dance showcase let's go
Winwin said Hendery is a hidden moron X'D
LMFAO Making Hendery reenact the joker dance with Xiaojun singing the accompaniment and getting really into it. They are the idiot brothers XD
I didn't know about this lol. Apparently something was broken backstage at the NCT Nation concert and they made WayV fill up time by speaking in Korean. That was why they had to do the aegyo battle?!?!?!?!?
Ten's reenactment of Winwin preparing for aegyo battle was all 'hold my beer' lol
Ten, please reenact your washroom sitting pose
WayV are close as demonstrated by them willing to share the washroom with each other lol
Reaction meme. Also Sicheng just casually leaning on Ten's thigh lol.
So Ten is strict about age hierarchy in Korea :P
Winwin is all heehee about Ten being a strict hyung because they arrived in Korea on the same day XD If I remember correctly, didn't Winwin and Kun also arrive at SM on the same day?
Clapping is the theme of this episode ;)
OMG how old is that video? Winwin and Kun look sooo young
Hendery continuing the 'I love Kwangya' propaganda
Xiaojun and Haechan share secrets!!!!! I love that they're buddies now <3 <3 <3
Xiaojun officially apology for not shaving his pits ToT
This is news to me, Ten is not very savvy lol
Corporate shill
Ten @ Jonathan: You're the best MC I've ever seen Jonathan: There's another MC behind you Xiaojun: It's fine
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So yeah, interesting commercials with the Dragon Ball cast. Several deal with Gohan (Later Gohan, Trunks and Goten) having eye troubles after swimming cause their Saiyan heritage doesn't negate the need to use drops. Several US commercials involve Ford Fusion and a Japanese one during the time of Battle of the Gods where the Dragon Team shill.... I mean share their love of KFC.
Still not the most bizarre collab ad I've seen for KFC. (I have a print copy of #1, incidentally. Don't worry, I didn't pay money for it.)
The eyedrops one is the weirdest of all these to me, though. I've never heard of needing eyedrops after swimming, never mind it being big enough to do an ad campaign with Dragonball. Unless that was the point, it was a brand new idea no one would have given time of day to without a big character to draw attention to it?
But it's the car commercials absolutely make the most sense to me. Ever since I saw He-Man and the Ninja Turtles selling cars, I realized my generation ruined the world. Why not have our childhood toys sell us cheap cars in our middle age? It makes perfect sense that we still make buying decisions like we're 8 years old, despite having 8-year-old offspring ourselves. (Or, at least, most of us. I missed that memo.)
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Totally Not Mark
youtube
I think the TNM situation is pretty widely known by now. I only recently learned just how popular the guy is, but Iâm not big into the YouTube scene. However, I do keep an eye on Twitter, and something Mark said in this video kicked off a controversy there. Â
First off, while the above video recaps the situation pretty well, Iâll go over it here: TNM produces video commentaries and reviews on various anime properties, including Dragon Ball. Late last year, Toei tried to have 150 of his videos taken down from YouTube, citing copyright infringement.  Mark argued passionately that the footage in his videos was covered by fair use laws, but Toei simply didnât care, and YouTube was unresponsive to his plight. Demoralized by the situation, Mark took some time off to figure out what to do next, and then YouTube finally stepped in and did the right thing.Â
As it turns out, Toei actually broke the rules by trying to take these videos down without proper justification, and when pressed to provide a rationale for their takedown request, they just... didnât? I wonât get into the legal details here, but my understanding is that while Japanese copyright law is much stricter than in other countries, it canât be applied outside of Japan. So YouTube finally settled the issue by fixing it so Markâs videos will be available everywhere except Japan, which suits Mark fine, since he doesnât have an audience there anyway.  The only real question is why YouTube didnât implement something like this for everybody years ago.
Itâs a real victory for the little guy, and Iâm genuinely surprised and pleased to hear that he won, because I was all set to write a much more depressing take on his situation, basically amounting to âWhat did you expect?â It seems like YouTube makes life difficult for its content creators at every turn, and Toei doesnât respect its foreign fanbase at all, so I didnât think Mark would ever get this far.Â
But thatâs not what Iâm here to talk about. Iâm looking to address what Mark said that got Twitter all riled up.  At 9:09, he says: âAnd look, this is just my opinion, but I genuinely believe that had it not been for Team Four Star and their Dragon Ball Z Abridged Series, Dragon Ball wouldnât have remained nearly as popular in the Western World during the time where not much new content surrounding the property was being released.â
I transcribed this excerpt, mainly because one of the rallying cries on Twitter is that no one in the DBZ fandom can read or listen, so this is my attempt to have a good faith discussion here.  I had to rewatch that twelve seconds of the video several times to make sure I transcribed it right, so I am very clear on what the man said, okay?
Also, to provide some context, Markâs point was that Toei would be better off embracing fan works instead of trying to bully them by abusing YouTubeâs copyright takedown system.  I agree with that point entirely, however, I think his chosen example gives Team Four Star more credit than theyâre due.  More under the cut.
From what I could see on Twitter, Markâs statement was clipped and tweeted by a guy who simply captioned it as âShit opinionâ, which sort of polarized anybody who might have agreed or disagreed with it.  I donât agree with what Mark said, but itâs hardly a âshitâ opinion. In any event, the whole thing boiled down to two camps:
1) People who like Team Four Star, who were introduced to Dragon Ball through their Abridged series, and are pretty sore at Toei for all their bullying tactics.
2) People who find TFS overrated, who already liked Dragon Ball just fine, and think Mark was just shilling for his pals.
I kind of want to straddle the fence here, because Iâm old enough to remember at time when DBZ was red hot in the early 2000â˛s, and then there wasnât a whole lot of new stuff to enjoy, and then I discovered DBZA in 2010, and it was heartwarming to see such a popular fan project bringing so many fans together. Â
But, as much as I enjoy DBZA, I donât think TFS âsavedâ the Dragon Ball franchise, or anything like that. To be sure, Mark never said that TFS âsavedâ the franchise, but thatâs kind of what everyone on Twitter was arguing about.  Was there a âdroughtâ in official DB content?  When was that drought? How long did it last? Was it even a problem? And if it was a problem, did DBZA fix it? The people in Camp 2 say no, thatâs absurd.Â
The people in Camp 1 seemed to harp on the exact words Mark used. â[Without DBZA] Dragon Ball wouldnât have remained nearly as popular in the Western World during the time...â  Thereâs a lot of qualifiers there to unpack, though.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/4722a5248d3b0108f410a462022876a5/b19ed5372630e7b2-6e/s540x810/26f2a4a76ead8ddf7efe45213860b3ba0e6d95eb.jpg)
 First of all, ânearly as popularâ, what is that? How much popularity would DB have lost in the early 2010â˛s, and how much of that popularity did TFS recover for them? I donât think thereâs any way to measure that. This is why the debaters were so passionate, because all they could really do was point to the viewer counts on the DBZA videos, and talk about their own personal experiences with DBZA.  Except personal experiences are singular, and viewer counts canât tell us how many of those people were already die-hard fans before TFS was founded.Â
The talking point I saw from Camp 1 was this: âLook, heâs not saying Abridged saved Dragon Ball, he just said that it lost a little of its popularity, and Abridged helped them get most of that loss back.â Which is perhaps a fair statement, but itâs also so mild that it defeats Markâs original point: that Toei could be more successful by working with fan creators instead of against them. If DBZAâs contribution was negligible, then itâs all academic. Â
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/e0eb456b3f7892cb8475cc60653cf09a/b19ed5372630e7b2-0f/s540x810/5d1cd789f7c9e70356ee0ac31efbc2ae5286ea80.jpg)
What about âThe Western Worldâ? Another important qualifier, as Dragon Ball never stopped being a big deal in Japan, Latin America, and other parts of the world.  Dragon Ball Z Abridged was made in the U.S.A., and the whole thing is in English, so it probably doesnât have much penetration outside of the Anglosphere.  Except Iâm pretty sure the âWestern Worldâ is bigger than just the parts of it that speak English.Â
Again, I feel like Mark was trying to talk up the success of DBZA, but he didnât want to exaggerate his case, so he had to put a few disclaimers on the statement, even as he was making it.  Like, okay thereâs a passionate fanbase in Latin America that has nothing to do with Team Four Star, but you still have to give them credit for keeping the flame alive in these other countries.  Fine, but thatâs still kind of a mild statement, once you stop to interpret it that way.  Oh, and itâs not that they kept the flame alive, it just wouldnât have been nearly as hot otherwise. Okay.
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Finally, letâs talk about âduring the time where not much new content surrounding the property was being releasedâ For simplicityâs sake, Iâm going to refer to this as âthe droughtâ.  Of the three, I feel most qualified to speak on this, because I lived âthe droughtâ.  I wasnât a kid, either. I was in my 20â˛s and early 30â˛s.  I know the period fairly well.
Okay, so one of the side-arguments on Twitter concerned exactly when the drought was.  Dragon Ball GT ended in 1997, and Battle of Gods premiered in 2013.  The only DB material I know of that came out in between was the Yo! Son Goku special in 2008, Dragon Ball: Evolution in 2009, and Episode of Bardock in 2011.  There was some sot of One-Piece crossover too, but I donât know much about that.Â
However, those dates only concern Japan.  In the âWestern Worldâ, Dragon Ball was airing on Cartoon Network in the 2000â˛s. Iâm pretty sure the dub of GT finished up on Cartoon Network in 2005. After that, fans pretty much just had the video games. I believe that was around the time the Budokai Tenkaichi series was in full swing, followed by Raging Blast 1 and 2.  And Dragon Ball: Evolution was in theaters if anyone cared to watch it. I remember watching the Yo! Son Goku special from Shonen Jumpâs website in 2008.
Strictly speaking, you can say The Drought in the âWesternâ fandom spanned 2005 to the U.S. release of Battle of Gods in 2014. But Iâm not too sure about that, because youâve got Dragon Ball Kai showing up from 2009 to 2011 in Japan.  In the U.S., Kai was localized as Dragon Ball Z Kai and aired on Nickelodeon from 2010 to 2013.
So the timeline of The Drought looks something like this:
2005: GT dub finale
2006: DBZ Movies 12 and 13 released in the U.S.
2007: Not much
2008: The Yo! Son Goku special. Dragon Ball Z Abridged begins.
2009: Dragon Ball: Evolution
2010-2013: Dragon Ball Z Kai premiers on Nickelodeon
2014: Battle of Gods premiers in U.S. theaters.
2015-2018: Dragon Ball Super anime available on Crunchyroll.
So you definitely have a strong case for a drought in 2005-2009. I say this because GT sucked and by 2005 I could no longer deny it.  Movies 12 and 13 are my favorites, but Iâd already downloaded the Japanese dubs by then because I couldnât wait for them to come out. And the special in â08 and DBE werenât much to speak of.   DBZA episodes were available in â08 and â09, but I wasnât aware of it. And Kai never meant much to me, because they adapted stories I had already seen in Z. But I know a lot of younger fans point to Kai on Nickelodeon as what got them into the fandom, so I have to respect that. Â
For my part, â05 to â13 never felt like too much of a dry spell. This is partly because I never seriously expected Dragon Ball to come back. Some things just end, and I find it odd how modern fans seem to think that the franchise must continue no matter what.  Hey, thatâd be great if it did, but thereâs no guarantees here. In any case, I spent those years collecting my DVDs and manga so I could rewatch everything, and I played the hell out of all those video games. And in 2012, I started this blog. Â
I think part of the argument is that The Drought lasted from â05 to â13 because the games and Kai simply donât count.  Okay, to each his own, but if certain media doesnât count as content, then why should we count unofficial works like DBZA as things that helped the franchise?  It just feels like a circular argument, completely subjective. At least when Toei released Kai and the video games, they made money off of those things. Â
And thatâs really the issue I have with Markâs statement. Itâs entirely up to Toriyama and Toei to decide how much content they want to produce, and when to release it. If they didnât feel like doing much in â07, thatâs their call.  Iâm sure they made less money off Dragon Ball that year, but thatâs their business. If they want to let the franchise end and the fandom slowly wanes to nothing, thatâs fine too.  Mark makes it sound like someone needed to make something about Dragon Ball in 2008, and TFS stepped up to fulfill that obligation. But no, the obligation never existed.Â
Iâve seen Totally Not Mark kind of stray into this logic before, that rights holders should be grateful to fan creators for keeping their properties on the map.  I donât think heâs ever quite said it in so many words, but he circles around it once in a while. To be clear, I believe heâs well within his rights to make videos about copyrighted works, but sometimes I think he overestimates the importance of that contribution. His audience loves his stuff, and thatâs a wonderful thing, but Toeiâs under no obligation to like what he does. They donât have to consider it free publicity if they donât see it that way. Â
Thatâs not to say Team Four Star doesnât deserve some credit.  I think they made a big impact on the fandom with their work, and theyâve got a lot of talented people in their outfit.  Iâve been supporting them on Patreon for years.  They got me through some tough times, and Iâm grateful for that. I think a lot of people in Camp 2 were only arguing that Mark was wrong because they just hate TFS for the âBad Dadâ memes it spawned, but thatâs just as reductive as suggesting their YouTube show saved a best-selling cartoon franchise.
Anyway, thatâs my spiel, and it was just too long to fit into a Twitter thread, so Iâm putting it here.  Good night, everybody.
#dragon ball#team four star#dbz abridged#totally not mark#ask me about the star wars drought of '83 to '91
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I finally made a commissions card! If you want more info about this, DM me here or on twitter, or send me an email: [email protected]
Reblogs are SUPER appreciated. Thanks!
#commissions#comission#shill#shilling#fanart#raven#android 21#jolyne kujo#jolyne cujoh#dragon ball fighterz#JoJo's Bizarre Adventure#teen titans
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Here Be Dragons (Temp Title), Sequel Multi-Chapter fic to the oneshot Fallen Angel. Here's one of my favorite excerpts from it:
It was a simple shell game. The man had three cups and one coin. Heâd place the coin under one cup and then shuffle the cups around. The guesser then had to guess which cup the coin was under. If they were wrong, they were out of their money. If they were right, they kept their money plus what amount that the man promised to match.
Not that any of the three were for want of wealth. Virgil lived off whatever the peasants could pay in return of his potions and healing spells. Produce, fresh meat and herbs, mostly, but there was the occasional shilling. Patton was a free spiritâas long as he had a roof over his head, and food to eat, he was happy. Roman, of course, was a noble. Perhaps not the wealthiest in the kingdom, but he was far from destitute.
Patton went first. He bounced on the balls of his feet as he watched the shells attentively. The manâs hands flew as he moved the shells around. At last, he came to a stop and glanced up at Patton.
âWell?â
âHmm,â Patton hummed, pointing at middle cup, âIs this the right one?â
The man flipped the cup overâno coin.
âBetter luck next time.â He chuckled.
âAw darn. Do you guys want a try?â Patton asked, turning back at Virgil and Roman.
âIâll go next!â Roman proclaimed, placing a coin down on the counter.
Roman fared better than Patton. He won his first two tries, something that only stroked Romanâs ego and pushed him to keep playing. It wasnât until he tripled his bet that he finally lost. Virgil narrowed his eyes at that.
âVirgil, your turn?â Roman gave a flourish towards the stand.
He rolled his eyes at the Lord before stepping up.
âCan I hold the coin for a moment?â He asked the man, holding his hand out.
Heâd feared it mightâve been too weird of a request. But the man laughed and acted like it wasnât the first time someoneâs asked him that question.
âSee for yourselfâI promise itâs not enchanted in any way. Iâm sure a mage like yourself would be able to tell otherwise.â He said, winking as he dropped the coin into Virgilâs palm.
The mage ran his fingers against the glossy surface of the coin. The man was rightâthe coin was not enchanted in any way. It was just as it appeared to beâan ordinary shilling depicting the Kingâs portrait. He silently handed the coin back to the man and placed a coin of his own onto the table.
The man made a show of placing the game coin back underneath a cup and started the game. Virgil observed the cups, watching how the cup on his right moved to left, to right, to middle, to left and back to right again before standing stationary.
âWell?â The man asked, âwhatâs your guess?â
Virgil observed the cups, making an internal deliberation.
âThe sleeves of your tunic.â
âWâwhat?â The manâs face paled.
âThe sleeves of your tunic,â Virgil repeated, staring at him, âitâs not underneath any of the cups at all.â
âI can assure you, sir that it isââ The man reached a hand towards a cup when Virgil snatched his wrist.
âAllow me.â He said, before turning over the cupânothing. He did the same to the middle cup, still nothing. The third cup yielded the same results.
Patton let out a gasp. Roman simply clenched his jaw, unhappy to be tricked so easily.
âListen, a manâs got to make a livingââ
âYou lied to us,â Patton interrupted, frowning, âthat wasnât nice.â
âIâd appreciate it if you could give my friends a refund.â Virgil growled, but Roman shook his head.
âYou can keep itâthose coins will not be missed. However, if I find you pulling the same trick on othersâI will not be as forgiving.â
Virgil let out a string of ominous but unintelligible words.
âWhat was that?!â The man shrieked.
âA curse.â Virgil said before walking off.
âVirgilââ Patton cried as he and Roman followed after him.
âRelax, I didnât actually curse him,â Virgil raised his hands in a placating motion, âI just wanted to scare him, thatâs all.â
âHowâd did you know?â Roman demanded.
Virgil came to a halt.
âEasyâmagic.â
âMagic?â Patton and Roman echoed.
âNot magic-magic,â Virgil said, âMagic as in sleight-of-hand. They can make it look like something really disappeared or they can make you think itâs somewhere than where it actually is. It looks like magicâbut itâs not it at all. Itâs easy to spot if you know the tricks behind it.â
âThatâs how you knew the coin wasnât in one of the cups,â Patton realized, âBecause you knew he was using sleight of hand!â
âLoââ Virgilâs eyes drifted to the ground, âmy brother was obsessed with it back when we were kids. He taught a bit of it to me.â
âOh gods, I can just picture his reaction.â Roman murmured underneath his breath. Virgil let out a strained guffaw at that.
âCâmon, letâs check out the other games and hope theyâre not as corrupt.â Virgil muttered as he briskly walked away.
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Give & Toke
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https://archiveofourown.org/works/27069568
Happy 4/20 Yugihoes,
Please accept a humble posting of my puppyshipping/violetshipping weedfic.Â
Joey showed up at Kaiba's shiny new dispensary for the sole purpose of kicking Kaiba's ass.
It does not go as planned.
A gift for @sky-kaijouâ / @sky-kaijou-writesâ in honor of the 2020 New Zealand Cannabis Reefer-endum. TW: Marijuana use and sale.
Title by @auroraXborealis <3 For the Professional Rivals prompt of AU-Gust. . . . (context for this fic) Marijuana is decriminalized currently in Domino City, and stores can be licensed through a regulatory scheme similar to that of California.
Full story under the cut
Joey stomped into the new cannabis shop in the neighborhood. Â It looked like an Apple store: white walls, smooth white tables, iPads and clerks in matching polos. Â Gentrification had taken his neighborhood by storm, spinning the older apartment complexes into glamorous condos, replacing the older styled homes with sleek modern imitations, and leaving everyone who couldnât keep up forced to either move away or to the streets.
Joeyâs own rent was soaring, and so was his bitterness towards the invaders to his territory. Â And especially this cursed-ass pot shop. Â The shiny new dispensary hadnât made a terrible dent in his sales, but he couldnât keep up with the variety, the quality, or the convenience.
It was a travesty to his profession, is what it was. Â Joey had been dealing for yearsâheâd never gotten an allowance from his father and passing a little pot along had made up the difference. Â Once he graduated high school, it morphed into something of a full-time gig. Â That hadnât been his intention. Â It wasnât like he was trying to move up the distribution ladder or become the next gang lord. Â But heâd built a good network, and in an industry that ran on relationships and reputation, it was really going pretty well for him.
And this bastard had the gall to move into his territory! Â Sell his soulless, corporate product to his loyal customers. Â With this robotic, inhuman, unfeeling mockery of everything that weed is.
Joey spotted a mustachioed blue-polo wearing corporate shill and waved him over. Â âIâm here ta talk ta yer manager. Â Give him âa piece of my mind.â
âIf you intend to make threats against Mr. Kaiba in some sort of gang turf nonsense, you have no idea the true power that you areââ the goon responded, placid energy souring. Â Joeyâs fists clenched tighter, body preparing for a fight.
âIâm not sure a piece of your mind would get you very far.â Â While Joey was attempting to intimidate the soulless bud-tender, a tall brunet in a white suit with a light blue oxford shirt had stalked up behind him and interrupted.
Joey spun on the toe of his well-worn red Nikeâs. âAnâ who do ya think you are?â
The brunet crossed his arms over his chest. Â âSeto Kaiba, the license-holder for this establishment.â
Joey nervously ran a hand through his messy blond hair.  He hadnât expected the shop owner to be so young.  Or attractive.  All of his fight drained from him.  In Joeyâs decade of experience, rival dealers were rarely so⌠professional and polished.  Joey felt instantly underdressed in his varsity jacket and jeans.
âUh⌠well, yer in territory that doesnât belong ta ya!â  Joey stammered.
âIs that so? Â I assure you, I have all required state and local permits,â Kaiba answered, blue eyes narrowing. Â The taller man let a stray glance to Joeyâs old, green Jansport backpack. âPerhaps if you had a better view of my inventory, we could have a more amiable business relationship. Â Iâm not trying to alienate everyone in my industry.â
It was insane, the way the taller man could knock the fight out of him without even trying. Â Joey had never considered that his enemy would possibly seek to de-escalate the situation. Â Joey nodded and followed the taller man to the back, hypnotized. Â He maybe shouldnât have smoked a bowl before raiding the enemy facility.
Inside an equally pristine office, Kaiba lit a pre-rolled joint and took a long inhale. Â He passed it across the desk, the rolling papers poised delicately between his forefinger and middle finger.
Joey accepted the joint and took a hit. Â After an impressive pause, Kaiba released smoke rings from his lips slowly, in that perfect practiced way. Â The smoke dissipated softly, fading from tight circles and clouding the air. Â With no windows in the room, it seemed that his intent was to hot box it. Â Joey wondered idly how the white marble of the desk was so free from dust or ash if Kaiba took to smoking here.
Joey passed back the joint before releasing his breath in a round of hacking coughs. Â
While Joey was gasping for air and trying to gather his bearings, Kaiba produced a glass of water and a plain white ashtray. Â He gently rested the joint on the edge.
âThat was a proprietary strainâBlue Eyes White Dragon. Â Itâs Sativa. Â Iâm working on a hybrid model that has a significantly greater THC content. Â But the current Blue Eyes plant has the highest percentage of CBD for Sativa plants currently on the market in Domino. Â Thoughts?â Â Kaiba unbuttoned his white blazer.
Joeyâs eyes watered, and he managed to take a few sips from the glass.  âIt tastes⌠unique.  Kinda minty?â
Kaiba nodded, raising the joint to take another hit.
âSo, yâknow, I came here to talk about ya encroaching on my business. Â Iâve built up a book âa business in this part âa Domino, and Iâm not gonna give up that easy!â Â Joey said, straightening his shoulders. Â He couldnât tell if he was sitting up properly. Â The world was already starting to feel a little warmer, fuzzier. His forehead sort of tingled like he had a third eye.
Once again, Kaiba blew out a series of flawless rings, staring into space. Â The blue irises of his eyes were framed by smoke-induced redness. Â âYes, well, I have no intention of cowing to any threats. Â I took this corrupt pharmaceutical company from my dead father, and I am turning it into something that can actually improve peopleâs lives. Â And no puny street punk will stand in my way.â
âOof. Â Sorry for ya loss.â Â Joey elected to ignore the last comment, as a gentleman. Â And because, for the first time, he spotted a white holster tucked under the newly opened sport jacket.
âDonât be, he was a bastard,â Kaiba said with a satisfied smirk.
Joey laughed at the insinuation. Â He mightâve had more to say, under other circumstances, but Kaiba had shared the good shit. Â Instead, the room felt a few degrees warmer than when he had entered and he removed his letterman jacket, revealing his toned biceps.
Kaiba was constructing another round of rings when his eyes met Joeyâs sculpted arms. Â His focus was completely dashed, and he ended up exhaling the rest of the smoke from his nose, like a dragon.
âHa, ya see something ya like, rich boy?â Joey said with a signature grin, picking up the joint again. Â It was already almost half-way spent.
Kaiba looked away dismissively. Â âIrrelevant. Â Mr. Wheeler, it was a matter of time before you paid my enterprise a visit. Â As you have most likely noticed, there are certain elements of the trade in which I excel. Â I am a gifted scientist, an expert businessman, andââ
âA robot? Â Youâve had double the hits I have and ya wonât even crack a smile! Â I dunno what yer tolerance has ta be, but ya ainât human anymore.â
Kaiba rolled his eyes, tapping the joint against the ash tray to release some of the built-up cinders. Â âThere is a certain social element to this business that I have no interest in participating in.â
Joey leaned over a little in his chair. Â âIs that so?â Â He meant to have an interrogatorâs pose and expression, but he was worried he just looked high as balls. Â
Kaiba passed the still burning joint across the table, little red ember barely emanating light in the bright white office. Â
âI would like to absorb your book of business and employ you as a bud-tender.â
Joey rejected the joint and cracked his knuckles, knowing that the action flexed his arm muscles. Â An almost-imperceptible blush flashed across Kaibaâs cheeks. Â âIâve been my own boss, mostly, for a little while now. Â Why should I be a glorified store clerk for ya?â
âYou canât possibly see this career continuing to serve you indefinitely. Â Youâll need to go legit or go to jail.â Â Kaiba lazily released one more puff of smoke before butting the joint. Â âBut, I am amenable to other arrangements. Â What do you propose?â
Joey smiled at the suggestion. Â âPartner. Â It doesnât haveta be fifty-fifty or anything, but Iâve built somethinâ up, and I know what Iâm worth. Â I gotta be making at least five gâs a month.â
Kaiba finally broke. Â He laughed almost hysterically at the suggestion, doubling over and taking a full minute to get his breathing to settle. Â âYeah, ok. Â That would be, maybe, a five percent share of the retail business.â
Joey stretched, resting his arms behind his head, giving Kaiba an eyeful of his tight white t-shirt and strong pectorals underneath. Â âTen percent of the retail company.â
Kaiba nodded, picked up his phone and typed away. Â âThe contract will be prepared presently.â
âNeato,â Joey said with a lecherous smile. Â Everything felt soft, warm, comfortableâeven if the room looked so sterile it could be used for a surgery. Â âNow, what should we do with this time?â
Kaiba shifted in his seat and adjusted his light blue tie.
Joey leaned forward, planting an elbow on the desk.  âI got some ideas I think youâll like, partnerâŚâ
Kaiba leaned over the desk as well, a small smile budding on his lips. Â âOh, already?â
âYeah. Â In this business, yer supposed to seal a contract with a kiss.â
âI do not think thatâs customââ
Joey closed the remaining distance and captured his lips in a searing kiss. Kaiba relaxed into the kiss almost instantly. Â It was softer than Joey had expected. Â Sweet and hot, with the flavors of mint, smoke, and cannabis on his partnerâs lips.
Joey only broke it to walk over and climb into the brunetâs lap.
The contract was respectfully slid under the door.
FIN
#seto kaiba#Kaiba Seto#Jounouchi Katsuya#Joey Wheeler#puppyshipping#Violetshipping#my fic#crossposted on ao3#tw: drug use#tw: marijuana use
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His Saxon Whore
â pairing | Hvitserk x Saxon Whore!reader
â type | oneshot
â summary | having grown up in a world where there are no brothels, he finds them a mystery when he meets her in york. he comes to see her-- but its not always about sex.Â
â Â warnings | prostitute!reader, vikings/saxons, slightly rude!hvitserk, mother whoring out daughter
â syâs notes | if i left out a tag, iâm sorry.
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They all told him his dick would fall off.
But he didnât really care.
There were no brothels at home. Thralls? Yes. Plenty and plenty of warm pussies he could buy. But nothing was cheaper, and more worth his coin, than the little brothel he came upon in York one day. Quivering little bodies who explained, quite willingly, that they were meant for the sort of work Hvitserk came to take them for.
So yanking her leg out really wasnât necessary. But as he found out, she preferred a man that knew what she liked. Not politely giving coin but, deliciously being chucked over his shoulder and swept off like a man from raid coming home. And really... thatâs what this was.
âWho you here to see this time, sweetheart?â
Hvitserkâs eyes scan over the woman, whose sloppy skirts are picked up over the spider veins that run up her shapely legs. Sheâs seen him before, no doubt. The woman has a tendency to pick on men she deems as worthy targets. Baby boys looking for a mommie. But heâs never had mommie problems-- or, none that he couldnât handle.
He turns his head from her small, meager little hut toward a thatched roof with soft planks of wood to support it. It bore an iron door. Mainly because after his last visit, he claimed that the do. It opens and a farmer skitters out hiding his face as he goes. Likely didnât want to tell his misses the shillings he burned.
â(Y/N), like usual.â
Hvitserk says to the pimp whose husband was busy with other duties. She looks him up and down, the cloak over his head obscuring his eyes and the worth of his sword. She could likely charge a fair and healthy price-- fifteen shillings, maybe even twenty for a prince like him. But one look and she knew who he was, a vikingr and dangerous territory.
âFive shillings then,â she says. âMy girl will treat you good again. Best one I bore.â
âTwenty for the night.â Hvitserk drops the shillings in her hand. She stands aside to allow him to duck into the home. This space you shared with your other sisters is far from private. Itâs barely sectioned off into three different rooms by modest curtains. You sat in your section wiping down the wooden bed. Then after cleaning yourself, you chuck the cloth into a bucket of cool water.
Hvitserk draws the curtains shut.
âPrincess,â he draws out your fitting title.
You sit more properly when you hear that heavy accent. A Vikingr, sure, but your Vikingr to be correct. The red veil you meant to wear is sloppily thrown on the ground.
âOh!â you laugh, âIâm hardly decent.â
âIâve been waiting,â Hvitserk lurches forward, tipping you back upon the bed. You reach out and pull the cloak off his honey brown hair, skidding your hands over his shoulders and tightening there as he devours your neck in soft kisses unlike the attention given by other men. With no clothes on, his greedy hand palms over your flesh. The mop of his long brown hair trails lower then, forcing you to keep in place with a firm hand forming a collar around your neck.
He brings his other hand around your breast and opens his mouth around your nipple. His mouth closes over the delicate flesh there, suckling your nipple with soft force. Then tugs slightly as to hear you cry out. Hvitserk tweaks your nipple as he pulls off. Catching your eyes, his hand migrates lower over the expanse of your stomach toward wiry curls hiding your well-abused pussy.
You reach out, tightening over his shoulder, and stop him. âItâs not decent.â
Youâre an illiterate prostitute whose cunt at this point probably reflected the amount of soiling done to it, but he feels little seed there when he pushes his fingers in. Just a smooth silkiness to your well used walls. While ignoring you, he stretches you open around his fingers. In your protest, you shut your legs as well as you can.
âI have enough coin to do what I want,â he says. It sounds acrid off his tongue-- and yet, well intentioned. âOpen your legs.â
You cautiously obey him, opening so that he might see. Hvitserk slides down, spreading your lips apart in order to thrust his fingers smoothly. As much as you donât want him to, his tongue soothes the motion along your lips. Almost making you excited-- but when he pulls his fingers clean, its almost as if heâs checking a well baked cake for batter. He smoothes the blood over the forest green sleeve of his tunic.
âYouâre torn,â he observes, almost wounded.
âItâs typical.â
Not typical for him to press on when his woman was in pain. At least not his free women. Hvitserk shoves your legs together and climbs back up to lay beside you. You savour his arm sneaking behind your back, pulling you in.
âThe men. They are big here?â Hvitserk asks, curious if it was overuse, roughness, or perhaps your lack of excitement that drove you to tear.
You snort. âIf only. Theyâre short, stupid and-- annoying. They come here to whine about their wives or of King Alfred while being good, wholesome Christians.â
âThat sounds right.â Hvitserk laughs as you reach for your dinner. A simple dinner of roasted deer and bread. It became obvious that he wasnât going to force sex tonight. Your sore pussy was glad for it⌠though, you did miss him.
âAescwine though,â you jerk your head to the side. A man that had been waiting patiently for his attention. âHe enjoys it when I stand on his dick and beat his balls.â
âOh-- ahh! Why would he do that?â
Hvitserk reaches down, cupping his hand on top of his privates. You laugh at his expense. Itâs almost too cute the way he immediately assumes heâs next. Youâve not done it to anyone else. You take a bite of the leg and lead it up against his lips. âSome men like it. You could--â
âNo,â Hvitserk takes a bite, shifting back to set his arm around you. He lays down with his eyes closed and you wonder how comfortable his armour was to sleep in. You turn over against him, walking two fingers over the scruff of his jaw.
âWhat are you thinking?â you ask.
ââBout you.â He answers. âHow you never get pregnant.â
âI do,â you explain. âThatâs what the pennyroyal is for.â
Then-- nothing.
Hvitserk takes some time to think on it. Heâs asked you before how you came into this profession. Family business, you said. But a family business where your father and mother pimped their daughters out? Doesnât seem right to him. But, again, Anglo-Saxon women werenât free. They belonged to the men in the family more so than Norsemen.
Itâs a great headache.
âYou wanna learn to read again?â
And you smile behind greasy, roasted meat when he reaches back into his cloak, fetching the tablet and a small utensil used to scratch upon it.
âIâve probably forgotten,â you smile. Hvitserk flips the tablet, offering it out to you. Itâs his own language, but sometimes...
âSo have I.â
âYouâre so stupid,â you tease. But dropping your meat, you bring the tablet onto your lap and skim over what letters were already there. For a moment he admires the glitter in your eyes-- the delight you take in language. Even when you tear it apart.
âIvar says that all the time.â
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#hvitserk x reader#hvitserk/reader#hvitty x reader#hvitserk imagines#hvitserk's heathen feast#vikings imagines#viking imagines#vikings/reader#vikings x reader#vikings imagine#hvitserk imagine
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Breaking the Rules
So the Snyder Cut finally dropped. Four hours of Snyderisms like slow-mo, dumb kinetic camera work, and relentless edge. Now, I'm a card-carrying Marvel shill. Been real transparent about it for years. Marvel is my sh*t and Spider-Man is my favorite superhero. That said, i do like DC. I always give them a fair shake. Hell, my favorite capeflick is The Dark Knight. I even like Watchmen and that was a slog to get through. Iâve seen every film in the DCEU and they have left me wanting. A lot of DC heads write off my opinion because of my Marvel bias but letâs be serious; The DCEU is inferior to the MCU in almost every way. As it is, the DCEU needs to be better. It needs better storytellers. It needs a better plan. It needs a Feige. Snyder is not that dude and i donât think Wan is either. I think WB and ATT have to figure out a way to coalesce this sh*t because itâs all wonky, especially now that we have this Snyder Cut. Iâve already reviewed a Justice League before so all of the observations i made about performances in that, stand. This is more what i think this version does better and worse.
The Better
This opening is much better and makes more sense. That Super Death Wail as the principal genesis of Steppenwolfâs conflict, the thing that wakes that first Motherbox, makes way more sense that whatever the f*ck Whedon did.
This thing definitely looks so much more gorgeous that that first run. Zack Snyder canât plot a story to save his life but this motherf*cker can compose a shot, for real. Snyder is an idea man, a cat that just wants to make cool looking sh*t, but this ainât the medium for that. You can have all the beautiful shots in the world but if they are tied together by a shoestring of a narrative, then itâs just polished sh*t, you know?
The extended Aquaman intro was outstanding. Whedon didnât let this scene breath and, seeing it as it was intended, that was a mistake. Seeing this version of Justice League kind of makes Josstice League in itâs entirety, a mistake. Itâs weird that this was cut because itâs so good and shows so much more of Arthur.
Jeremy Ironâs Alfred continues to be my second favorite Alfred after Michael Caine. Sorry, Michael Gough...
Wonder Womanâs first scene in this, the one with the terrorists, is ridiculous. This one scene is a perfect example of the difference between the two versions of this film. Snyderâs is better, if way more brutal than it needed to be. Still, i love the warrior version of Diana so I'm good with this.
Speaking of Amazons, Snyder, apparently, put them in more clothes this time around? I couldnât really see for sure because of the color correction but it didnât seem like they werenât rocking those iron bikinis like in the Whedon cut. I think Joss Whedon might be a bit more problematic than we think. Between the half naked chicks, the way he kept sexualizing Diana, the fact that there are no people of color in his version or the way he shortchanged the entirety of Cyborgâs plot... Breh.
Steppenwolf is SO much more menacing in this version of the movie. Dude feels like a force, like a proper threat an not just some stop-gap for something better. Olâ Wolfie was a decent antagonist for an initial run at an Avengers-esque team up for the DCEU. Definitely more Loki this time around and less Ultron like the first time.
Also, the Parademons look much more dope. The first time, they looked like fodder. This time, they actual felt like a force, like a horde.
Hey, we got an Atom sighting!
Not a ton of Iris West but enough to wet my appetite. Anytime i get to see Kiersey Clemons in stuff, I'm happy. Having it tied to an outstanding sequence demonstrating Flashâs powers was just icing on the cake. Seriously, Snyder did a great job visualizing Barryâs abilities. That scene where he saved everyone from the debris and then the subtle reversing of time; All of it was dope to see.
Are those Starros that Steppenwolf is using to âinterrogateâ the cats with Motherbox stink on them? They look like little mechanical Starros. I hope theyâre Starros.
Lots of Cyborg stuff. Like, intricate Cyborg stuff. The sh*t Whedon cut of Vic was instrumental to the coherency of this story and dude was just like, âNah.â Itâs no wonder that version of the movie doesnât make any f*cking sense.
Hey, we got a Spectre sighting! Nice.
The explanation for the Motherboxes and their mcguffin-ness goes a long way to soothing the whole âresurrecting Supermanâ thing. Snyder basically tells the audience theyâre magic boxes that can do anything because of magic-technology. Itâs a little ridiculous considering what Motherboxes actually do in the comics but whatever. It makes sense in this universe i guess.
All of the action scenes are better. All of them. Snyder is nothing if not a cat that can actualize a dope punch-out. Dude canât get out of his own way when telling a story but if you need a fight scene, Snyder is definitely your guy.
Speaking of, that climax was WAY better. It carried far more weight and there were times when the heroes felt like they could lose. Thereâs an unrelenting tension that grips you hard and doesnât let up until it finally does. I appreciated this way more than the first one, even if itâs dumb edgy for no reason.
The Worst
Zack still doesnât understand these characters, man. Itâs very apparent to me that a lot of this is just window dressing for kind of a Zack Snyder fan fic version of DC and thatâs fine i guess? Sh*tâs not my cup of tea but a great many people seem to like it. Dudeâs writing can definitely be tighter and he can skew a little more toward the heart of these characters but i mean, itâs called Zack Snyderâs Justice league for a reason.
The Snyderisms, man, they are all over this thing. Look, i just donât like how Zack makes movies. Too much style, not enough substance, or rather, not enough focus. He has a ton of great ideas but gets too bogged down in how sh*t looks, or tumbles down his rabbit hole of concept but never expresses any of them clearly enough. Outside of 300 or Dawn of the Dead, this film is probably the most focused I've ever seen Snyder and itâs still kind of all over the place yet, never where it needs to be.
So many plot holes, man. Less than before, but so many threads left untied.
This thing didnât need to be four hours long. Not even close. There were several shots that i thought could have been cut. Like, that three hour version which got the standing ovation was probably the best version of Justice League and weâll never see it. This version is definitely better than the theatrical run but f*ck is it long. You really feel that sh*t, too.
Cyborg still looks gross to look at. Youâd think theyâd try and make his weird, angular, body look a bit better upon the redo but nope. This what we get i guess.
Also, why the f*ck the Atlanteans sound British? Why they make Amber Heard do that accent? She canât do that accent, man. Youâre actually asking a chick whoâs professionally pretty to act and she canât act. Sheâs just pretty. That actually brings up an interesting question; Is Aquaman canon to this universe because Mera in that doesnât have an accent and her Pops is still alive. This one has an accent and her parents are dead. Or maybe the accent makes it easier to recast Heard later with a British actress? Maybe the Mother of Dragons really is about to be the Queen of the Seas?
Why is this Knightmare sequence in here? Sure, it was awesome to see, pure fan service, but this is the blue balls of blue balls because we donât have a movie to follow this one. This is it. This is all the Justice League weâre getting. There is no part two or whatever. Why even hint at something more?
The Verdict
Thereâs a lot to like about this version of Justice League. It is, hands down, better than Josstice League in almost every way. Sh*t is a better film, man, and should have been what we got to begin with. WB did Snyder a disservice by letting him go and then letting Whedon butcher his movie. I donât like Snyderâs take on DC. I think itâs try-hard, edgelord, nonsense but it is itâs own thing and i commend him for that. Dude has a vision and I'll never take away from from a creativeâs inspiration. That said, this thing was a slog to get through. Itâs definitely better than what we got before but itâs still not that great and itâs way too long. Three hours is more than enough to tell this story if you make prudent cuts. Still, Iâm glad it exists and, if youâre a fan of this world, a fan of Snyderâs work, youâll love it. For me, as a cat who has no skin in this game, I'm not all that impressed. Per usual, Snyder has too many ideas and that leaves the plot unfocused and meandering at times. In a genre that is predicated on storytelling, you canât be a bad storyteller like that and just gloss over it with spectacle. Thatâs disingenuous. At the end of the day, it was entertaining. It was pretty to see. It was a Snyder film.
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I hate mobile games
It's not mobile games as a whole that I hate , but rather, the current trend of them being capitalistic cash cows while having the audacity to pump out mediocre content.
Recently got finished playing two mobile games that I had high hopes for only for that hope to get crushed.
One of them was seven's code. It's a new rhythm game made by naoki Maeda, the producer and composer for many dance dance revolution games. It looked so promising with it's professional art done by BUMBUN( character designer for Yuki Yuna is a hero) and it group of guest artists. It also seemed to be a story heavy game focusing on themes of mystery and cyberpunk, a rarity for rhythm games. I played the first five mission and while they were incredibly easy, it was enough to keep me entertained and the story got better with each progression.
Turns out that the game isn't free at all. It's a trial game. Players have to shill out money to get the complete product and advance the story, something that was not advertised anywhere in it's promotion. This tactic is a much bigger slap in the face than the gacha scheme since it's tricks players into getting invested into what they believe is a free game only to have content that should be free be blocked by a pay wall.
What a waste of potential. Seven's code could've been great if it wasn't blinded by money.
Black clover phantom knights is the other atrocity I endured and unlike seven's code, it was very upfront about it's crap quality. It's an auto battle game where the computer does all the work for you and the only interactive part is choosing when to use your special attack. I don't know who in the 8 cycles of hell thought an auto game would be fun but they need to get bitch slapped like a cheap whore. There's absolutely no point in playing a game where you can't even control the characters and think up of strategies. This is slightly even more disappointing than seven's code since black clover is a fun manga series with epic battles that deserve to be rendered in a nice action game. This game being made by bandai namco was perhaps a sign it would be bad. They have a long of mediocre anime games after all.
It's clear anime mobile games need a lot of work if they want to be taken seriously as a form of entertainment. On the bright side, he's some mobile games that are actually pretty cool and worth your time.
Dragon Ball legends
Fate grand order
Seven deadly sins grand cross ( coming soon)
Mobius final fantasy
Sinoalice( whenever that game finally comes to global)
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Anime Update 14
[NOTE: Apologies for this coming late. I took the previous week off since it was the week of Halloween. This is not likely to happen again until Christmas.]
CLANNAD - So that was the end of Kotomiâs arc and....I know this is an unpopular opinion but I gotta be honest - it didnât really grab me the same way the end of Fukoâs arc did. I was sensing the emotional intention behind how things played out and the heart behind it...but I just wasnât actually feeling it. It didnât move me the way it was supposed to. And I think itâs because I felt this arc played itâs best card right in the very middle, raising my expectations for how it could unfold only to be let down by how it actually did. I had no emotional investment in Kotomiâs parents. I feel they shouldâve fucked things up for Kotomi WAY worse than how they did in order to make the tragedy of their deaths before they could make it up to her, and the weight of their amends to her living on well past their deaths so that it eventually did make itâs way to their daughter, much more effective. In theory, I love the conclusion of the parentsâ âsuper important thesisâ ending up having been discarded in favor of a personal letter and showing of love to their daughter, but it needed better execution in order for it to fully land with me. Also, that âyesterday, I saw a rabbitâ poem got way overplayed, and I was left still scratching my head over what the point of having Okazaki and Kotomi being childhood acquaintances was, âcause you donât typically forget a person who had such a significant part in your life, such as setting a whole room on fire on the eve of her birthday when youâre right there to see it happen. If Okazaki had some repressed trauma, then that would explain it, but the narrative didnât play it that way - he simply just forgot Kotomi was ever a thing for some reason. WEAK.
Dragon Ball - No words could do justice to that âshow me the two balls you have hidden in your clothesâ gag. Possibly the dirtiest joke ever done in Dragon Ball. Aside from that, Hasky really wasnât quite the threat she was built up as. To quote Toffee of Septarsis, she had all the power in the world at her fingertips and got tickled right out of it. Thatâs seriously how sheâs done away with, and in a very abrupt manner too. This was all anime filler, so I guess I shouldnât be too surprised. The image of the Colonel Silver lookalike in the city was used again, so I wish they couldâve just brought Silver into the plot and have him help save the day. Again itâs filler, so itâs not like there was anything stopping them from pulling something like that!
Toradora -Â This episode was half amusing, half uncomfortable. Like, Kitamuraâs sudden turn to being a runaway delinquent whoâs given up on everything heâd ever been a part of before was a blend of both feelings and it kept me braced for any mood whiplash. It at least began on a fun note with Ami's dick trolling, but then by the end it's playing the prospect of hair getting dyed back to normal as a huge dramatic turn! There was also this incredibly bizarrely written scene before the midway point that perfectly demonstrates the seriesâ second half problems. More specifically, the seriesâ second halfâs Minori Problems. Minori starts talking about problems between Kitamura and his peers, then transitions into shilling Ami for her knowledge and maturity while likening herself and the rest of them to oblivious, immature children who donât know any better, then she tries going back to her spacey, cheerful weird girl persona only to then freeze up and freak out about something Ryuji says, calling herself a big fat phony, and then...nothing. The conversation just dies and the scene stops. Iâm positive that there was actual context for this in the original light novel, but in the anime it just comes out of nowhere and leaves you confused. From what I can recall, this will be a recurring issue that plagues Minoriâs character development in this back half. But hey, Taigaâs running for Student Council now! Yay?
Excel Saga - OK so...Ropponmatsu 2 is a delight to watch, but one thing that bothered me was that I couldnât help feeling like Kira Vincent Davis ought to have swapped roles with Larissa Wolcott, as there were points when Davis sounded like she could do a better impression of what Jessica Calvello had done in the role of Excel. The one other distracting aspect was that towards the very end of the episode, the animation budget mustâve been lowered âcause a lot of it started looking REALLY cheap and off-model. The episodeâs funniest bit had to be how Excel and Hyatt disguised their big, lunky deathbot up as a panda and just about everyone fell for the ruse, to nearly fatal consequences. So ridiculous yet so fitting for this show. Also, Pedro might get a second chance at life. Weâre going places now!
Ace Attorney - Little Miles Edgeworth is the most precious thing and I would protect him with my life. It really was interesting to see how not so different yet WAY different Miles was as a kid compared to how he is now as a young adult. Having a father who wasnât fucking horrid like Von Karma is definitely the reason for that. The only big headscratcher here was that I wonder how late in development of the original game the decision to make Phoenix and Miles such close friends as children was, since Miles didnât seem to have any inner conflict whatsoever about trying to get Phoenix convicted for a murder he knew he didnât commit back in Turnabout Sisters, which is..troubling behavior from someone who supposedly took a Friends Forever oath. Oh, and that cameo of a young Franziska Von Karma. Iâm very interested to see that character in action soon...
Nadja of Tomorrow - I...was not the biggest fan of this one. Mainly because I didnât know what it was even trying to SAY. Seeing Kennosuke and Zabbie becoming such fast friends, especially after going âno girls allowed!â to Rita, just made me uncomfortable as I waited for the shoe to drop, and the way things played out ended up riddled with unfortunate implications. So Zabbieâs a tomboyish girl whoâs mocked by and alienated from her peers for being such a blatant tomboy, is the only girl in a clearly dysfunctional family full of brothers, and her mother wants her to wear her dress and âbecome more of a womanâ as she gets older, but Zabbie refuses. Since the final outcome is that Zabbie wears the dress, lets her hair down, and dances with Kennosuke at the festival, the episode seemed to take the position that SHE was the one in the wrong for not conforming to gender norms, as opposed to her peers and family members who expected her to conform. Yeah, they tried to save face with Nadjaâs throwaway line about how Zabbie actually truly wants to be more of a girl but is too embarrassed to start trying so she just doubles down on being boyish instead, but that didnât do anything to make this episode not reek of sexist Japanese standards for girls and women, which is particularly jarring since this oneâs set in the Alps, not in Japan. On top of that, the episode didnât have enough story to support it, so much time ended up getting spent on dance animation and the episode ended in the most underwhelming way possible! Really, the only thing of value I got from this one was the reveal about Chocolate and Cream. Otherwise, this episode can fuck off.
Mobile Fighter G Gundam -Â A part of me wishes that this show had taken the approach of Chibodee, Sai Saici, George and Argo being hosts for DG Cells all along, getting slowly corrupted without us knowing it until this episode. That wouldâve been an amazing curveball twist, though seeing those four fighters being all evil and deadly was amazing enough itself. We also got two very notable events in this one - Rainâs first time fighting inside the Shining Gundam and even getting to do the finishing Shining Finger move along with Domon (Rain is fucking awesome, it canât be overstated!), and the debut of Master Gundam, AKA the coolest looking Gundam piloted by the coolest villain in this series, though his identity was withheld for now. And so, shit has officially begun to get real.
AND
Black Lagoon - Watched the first two episodes of this anime, since they tell a complete story. I donât typically go for these kinds of seriesâ where the ugly side of humanity is on full display (we got crooked corporations, mercenary soldiers, mercenary pirates, the Russian mafia, and a bunch of bar thugs all in the same premiere!) and everything gets all violent and gritty, but there is just enough self awareness and levity here to make it not horrible. From what little we saw of Balalaika here, she manages to be cool and charming despite being an awful person, I find myself enjoying watching the Lagoon Company in action (mainly Dutch and Revy, as Benny didnât leave as strong an impression) because theyâre awful people, and with Rock, I just canât not love the concept of a college graduate Japanese Salaryman getting placed in these miserable circumstances that push him into bringing out his inner mad genius, especially when Brad Swaile is doing the characterâs voice. All in all, a fun ride. Not a particularly exceptional anime - just pure, mindless, amoral fun.
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