#[ ʚ♡ɞ ] — rena fics | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

kaveehs · 1 year ago

Text

Same Old Mistakes — Getou Suguru

fem!reader, she/her pronouns used, wc ≈ 4.6k, angsty with comfort towards the end, previously established relationship, break up, reuniting with an ex, Shoko, Gojo, and Utahime mention, slightly suggestive, reader and gojo have a moment, use of alcohol/mention of getting drunk

synopsis: after the breakup of your long term relationship, you finally decide to go out with your friends. who knew it would lead you right back where you started?

a/n: this fic was originally for the ex's and oh's collab but the creator archived, but i still wanted to share it. it's a bit on the longer side for me but i had a lot of fun writing it!

It’s been 8 months.

The departure happened too quickly for you to realize what occurred, or what could have caused it. You couldn’t deny the fact that despite how long it’s been since you’d last seen your former lover Getou Suguru, you constantly thought of him.

Everything was perfect on the surface. Suguru was all you desired at the time, coming out of a long-term relationship. In a sense, you were broken pieces for Suguru to collect and bring back together ever so slowly. He was a gentle and understanding man, a sharp contrast from your previous relationship. It was seemingly that way for him too. He made you believe you were perfect in his eyes. You were everything he could’ve ever asked for. You were an angel to him, and he would never leave, until he finally did.

Your thoughts trailed you down a path of regrets. You wondered what you could have possibly done differently to still have him in your life. Groaning at the aching feeling in your head, you glanced over at the time on your phone. It was well past the time you would normally start your day at. You stumbled out of bed and into the bathroom you shared with your roommate Shoko.

“I was worried you wouldn’t get out of bed at all today,” Shoko sighed as she made her way upstairs. “Are you feeling ok?”

“It’s just been a long morning,” you yawned, starting the shower. This wasn't entirely a lie. You did have trouble sleeping the night prior and your thoughts kept you from getting out of bed longer than you had anticipated. Realistically, you could have pushed those thoughts aside and gotten yourself out of bed.

Shoko finally greeted you through the doorway of the bathroom. The first thing you took notice of was how much she had changed from how you pictured her. Her hair had gotten slightly longer than you remembered, although she still had the same sleepy eyes as always. You bit the inside of your cheek, disappointed in the little attention you were paying to the world around you during this time.

“You were thinking about Suguru again, weren’t you?” Shoko questioned you on the matter with her arms crossed. She’d always been an understanding person to those around her, and it was no different for you. She’d been able to read you like a book since you first met in high school.

“How’d you know,” you said in a tone heavy with sarcasm, despite knowing the answer was obvious.

“Because, that’s all you’ve been doing all this while, especially during these ‘long mornings’.” She had been right. She knew you all too well, especially during these trying times when your thoughts had consumed you. All you could really do was nod at her in a sorry sense of agreement before shutting the bathroom door. You undressed, wincing at the hot shower water hitting your skin.

“By the way,” Shoko announced from the other side of the door. Her voice sounded slightly distant, as if she was projecting her voice from the staircase of your shared apartment. “Satoru’s going to be here soon. He said he wanted to see you.”

Your eyes widened at your roommate's words. It had indeed been a long while since you had last seen each other, and due to the circumstances, you didn’t know if this was a good or bad thing. He was your former lover’s closest friend— Gojo Satoru. The thought of his carefree, snarky personality always made you roll your eyes.

“Why does he want to see me?” you shouted over the sound of the water hitting the shower floor.

“Didn’t say. Maybe it’s just been a while.” Shoko finally made it back downstairs. You rinsed your face with the now mild water, attempting to wash away the stress of this entire situation to no avail. You knew in your heart you had to face him eventually, and that time has definitely come now. You inhaled sharply, embracing your moment of solitude in the shower.

What reason could he possibly need to see me for you thought. Yes, it was inevitable eventually but why today of all days. You couldn’t stop yourself from thinking of the possibility that it could be regarding your ex. Around 6 months ago, a similar event did take place, but you never got to see him, as Shoko told him it probably wasn’t a good idea for your own sake. Before you knew it, you were already drying off, hearing distant chatter as you headed towards your room to get dressed.

“Not at all. I wouldn’t blame her for not wanting to show up,” you heard the male voice answer a former question as you stepped into the kitchen. As the two heard your footsteps, they looked up at you. Shoko’s eyes had slightly widened, however her calm composer hadn’t left her. Both of her elbows rested on the kitchen’s island while they both sat on bar stools. Gojo on the other hand had the widest smile on his face. “But something in me knew she would come around,” he said as you crossed your arms. You couldn’t help but smile as well. You all had finally reunited after such a long time. Almost all, you had to correct yourself in your head. Suguru was still absent.

“It’s been a while, hasn’t it,” you remarked, grabbing the free seat at the head of the table. These were the same spots you all used to sit in when everyone would come around. So much time had passed yet so many things stayed the same, you thought.

“Sure has been,” Satoru let out one of those overly exaggerated sighs that he always used to do. “Ieiri already filled me in on everything, so we can just pick up right where we left off.”

“What exactly did you say,” you looked over to Shoko. She could sense this question would come eventually.

“There wasn’t really much to say. It’s been the same old,” she shrugged. “We barely see each other for more than an hour a day despite living together.”

“I know, I’m sorry,” you uttered weakly. Her eyes were a little less stoic than before, and a little more sympathetic. Satoru’s smile had also faded at some point. They both hated seeing you like this, rather than your lively self.

“I think you deserve a night out,” he said, resting his cheek on his fist. “That’s actually why I came today.” A puzzled look emerged on your face. There’s no way he was being serious, right?

“You want to invite me out,” you asked in genuine surprise. Gojo nodded enthusiastically. “I appreciate the gesture, and I know why you’re doing it, considering everything, but I don’t know if I’d be up for it–”

“Unfortunately, I’m not going to let you pass on this too.” Shoko interrupted your speech. “I’ll be going to, so we’ll be there together. I think it would be helpful for both of us.” Despite her words, you knew she wasn’t actually going to force you to come with her. You could translate them into her just wanting to spend time with you again. The choice was ultimately yours.

It surprisingly didn’t take you much contemplation to make your decision. Shoko was right– you needed to get out of your own head and into the world again. This was the perfect opportunity to finally let the past go and extinguish the flame. You were going to make the most of all the time you lost in sorrow.

“I’ll go,” the other two smiled at hearing your voice in a positive light. “Where is this place we’re going anyway?”

“You’ll see,” Gojo replied, cheeky smile and all. Your face soured into an annoyed expression.

“You’re not actually going to keep it a surprise, Satoru. You know how much I hate those,” you whined.

“It’s probably just some club,” Shoko let out a breathy sigh. “It’s not like Satoru would be clever enough to plan anything better than that.”

“Yeah yeah,” all Gojo could do was roll his eyes and shake his head, indicating Shoko was actually assuming correctly. You laughed at your friends in front of you. It was just like the old times.

“I’ll come get you both at 11.” You took a look at time on your phone. Although it was hours away, you mentally prepared yourself for going out again.

Time only seemed to move faster than it normally would throughout the day. You spent the rest of the afternoon cooking while watching a show Shoko had thrown on. When evening came, Shoko read out the ‘don’t forget about tonight’ text she’d received from Gojo as you began to start doing your makeup with her for the outing.

“I don’t even think I have anything to wear anymore,” you croaked, looking over to Shoko who was putting on a silver necklace. “Maybe this was a bad idea.”

“I wouldn’t say it’s a bad idea at all. I’ll go into your room and pick something for you,” she softly smiled, before adjusting the necklace and settling down her hair. She walked out the bathroom and made it straight to your room. With your relationship with Shoko, you knew you could confide in her about your doubts and fears.

“I don’t know how or why I agreed to this,” you yelled out to her just loud enough for her to hear from your room. There was no response from her. You thought she was unable to hear you from where you were, so you just kept quiet and continued to put on your makeup. A few minutes went by before she came back and called out your name.

“This would look great on you, I remember when we went to buy this,” she held up a backless black top with a matching leather mini skirt. It was in all sense of the words club attire, something you couldn’t possibly see yourself wearing in the state that you’ve been in.

“I don’t want you to feel like you have to go out tonight, but I think it’ll be good for you,” Shoko started again, reaching her hands out to lend you the outfit. “The choice is all yours.” You nodded, accepting it into your hands.

“You know me, I’m just all wrapped up in my own head,” you giggled heartfeltly, setting the outfit down on your lap. “I don’t know what I’d do without you, Ieiri.”

“You’d lock yourself away forever, ‘cause unlike Satoru, you know I can’t convince you to do anything,” she smirked as she touched up her own makeup. “You look way too good tonight to shut yourself in though. Maybe I would’ve had to drag you.” You both bursted out into laughter. “I’ll meet you downstairs, he should be here soon.” Shoko stepped out of the bathroom.

You finished getting ready soon after, slipping on a pair of platform heels you spontaneously found in your closet. You heard the voices of Satoru and Ieiri, prompting you to hurry downstairs.

“I hope you guys weren't waiting for too long,” you uttered breathlessly after making it down the stairs. You looked up only to see the two smiling at you as if they hadn’t seen you in years. Shoko immediately engulfed you into an embrace, the smell of her perfume made you feel even more secure. It seemed as though Gojo’s eyes hadn’t left you either.

“Not at all,” she replied. “I was right about earlier, that you look way too good to shut yourself in.” You both chuckled as she let you go and made her way to the door that Gojo had opened. You couldn’t help but turn your attention to him.

“You’ve been staring at me with that look ever since I got down here, Satoru.”

“Because you look good,” he whispered just loud enough for you to hear. It was such a simple, off hand comment yet it made you almost freeze in your tracks. “I’m glad to have you back,” he continued as you both locked eyes. You couldn’t think of any words to say— all you could do is smile and roll your eyes at him as you walked out the door.

The ride there was filled with random chats and conversations. These two were incredible at keeping you at ease through this simple part of the night. When you had finally arrived at the club, you felt your nerves return to you like they never truly left. Shoko squeezed your hand in an effort to tell you things were going to be fine, this gesture helped alleviate the tension stored in your body.

You were granted entry with no problem— the bouncer seemingly took one glance at Gojo and let all three of you in. The bass of the music that blared through the speakers could be felt throughout the whole club. The strobe lights were almost blinding. Your grip on Shoko’s hand tightened as you squeezed through the crowd and to the bar.

“I think Utahime is here,” she leaned in so you could hear her better. “Want to say hi?” You hesitated for a bit. Like Gojo, it had been a long time since you had seen her, maybe even longer. It would be great to see her again, but you weren’t entirely sure if you were ready yet.

“Sure, I’ll come find you later,” you answered, taking a seat at the bar. She nodded, giving Gojo a stern look as if to say ‘Make sure she doesn’t overdo it’ as she turned and disappeared in the crowd.

“Sorry you’re on babysitting duty,” you joked after asking for a drink. Gojo was dressed in a fitted white button down with a window of his chest exposed, typical clubbing attire on his part. His rectangular blacked out frames rested on his nose bridge, although you could still see his eyes.

“Don’t be like that,” he laughed while receiving a drink from the bartender. You assumed it was his signature, seeing as he seemed to be a regular here. “It’s been such a long time, I could never get sick of seeing your face.” You turned your chair towards him, thanking him for getting you out the house tonight.

“Drinks are on me tonight,” he spoke again. “Just try not to drink too much, or Ieiri might actually kill me.”

Conversation seemed to flow so easily, as if there’d been no lost time between you two at all. The more you both drank, the more you talked about anything you possibly could. It was the first time your mind had been so free these past 8 months. Suguru hadn’t crossed your mind once while you listened to Gojo talk on and on. It felt amazing to finally focus on something else— more specifically on someone else for a change.

“Come, dance with me,” he suddenly leaned into your ear. You could feel a smirk develop against it as you got up and took his hand. He led you to the outskirts of the dance floor, further from everyone else. He made it easy to focus on him— the fresh smell of his cologne filled your senses as you kept your eyes solely on his tall frame. You found your body swaying to the natural flow of the music.

“I wish we’d done this sooner,” your soft voice made you wonder if he could hear you over the music. “I missed this.”

“I know,” he pulled your body closer to his. The smell of the alcohol you both had consumed earlier lingered on his lips. “I’ve missed you.” The smug grin on his face only grew more apparent when he witnessed your cute reaction to his words. Satoru had always been known as someone who was lightweight, but it was hard to tell if it was the drinks talking or if he really did mean what he said.

“Are you already drunk Satoru?” you furrowed your brows at him as your eyes traced his features. You even found yourself slurring on your own words while you questioned his sincerity. You slowed down your movements with the beat of the song, but also because he’d piqued your curiosity.

“Only a little tipsy,” he bluffed as his hand trailed over to your lower back. You looked down at his hand, then back to him as you felt your distance close in. His other hand trailed from your upper thigh to your waist. His touch left behind a satisfying sensation— it’d been so long since you felt another person’s hands on you like this. You truly had no room to think of anything else but him. Despite being as close as you were, bodies pressed against one another, you noticed he wasn’t looking down at you anymore— instead straight ahead. You didn’t pay much mind to it until you heard someone speak.

“You’re awfully handsy with her,” you heard a male voice from behind you. Sure, you were startled, however it wasn’t the suddenness that made you stop moving.

It was how familiar the voice sounded.

Everything from the tone to the pitch sounded familiar. You tried to ignore the details but you couldn’t. You knew exactly who was behind you.

“Suguru, you’re finally here,” Gojo confirmed your suspicions with the name. It was him. “I didn’t think you’d make it.” His voice was as casual as ever, as if he knew Suguru would be here and would see you. Your mind went back to the word ‘finally’ that he had said. Did he know this would happen? “I’ll give you two some space to talk, yeah?” There was no doubt in your mind now that he planned for this whole exchange to take place.

“How about we go somewhere quieter,” your thoughts were interrupted by the voice of your former lover while he reached out his hand for you to take. Of course, you were reluctant to take his hand and he knew this. You had every reason in the world not to after all, 8 months of no contact at all and suddenly he’s right in front of you again. Still, his eyes were just as convincing as they were when you were with him. You were hurt and confused, and your heart ached to take his hand. You needed answers, you thought as your hand met his ever so slowly. The familiar feeling of the warmth from his hand engulfed your own.

He led you astray to a private area, stumbling far enough to where the music became muffled and faded in the background. The area was dimly lit, however you were still able to make out the figure of the man in front of you clearly. Once you both stopped moving, you swiftly let go of his hand, sinking down into the booth in the room. He sat a ways away from you, however he rested his arm closest to you on top of the booth, right where your head was. You couldn’t help but roll your eyes at the predicament you were in.

"I didn't think you'd show up, let alone with Satoru," he remarked. You could feel his eyes staring down at you, but you didn’t look up into his eyes.

“Why does it matter,” you asserted, thinking back to the idea of Gojo planning out this whole event. Was Shoko aware? Was she in on it too? You subconsciously bit your inner cheek to prevent yourself from asking any more questions.

“Well, I wasn’t expecting to see you with him, bodies all pressed up against each other,” he voiced so matter-of-factly, which annoyed you to no end.

“Again, why does it matter? We’re not together anymore,” You sat up a bit, feeling his stationary hand brush against the back of your head when you did.

“So you’re with Satoru now?” his question sounded more like a statement.

“No,” you scoffed, your eyes finally met his. “I haven’t seen him in like six months, so your jealousy is pointless.” The expression of relief on his face baffled you. Truly, why did he care so much about whatever you decide to do after the break up.

“It matters because he’s a good friend of mine, or did you forget that,” he analyzed you with a smirk growing on his face.

“I guess I have selective memory.”

“You’re the same as always, as stubborn as ever.” A chuckle erupted from his lips as you shot him a nasty glare. His whole demeanor confused you– he was as calm and collected as ever despite your obvious disdain towards him. He was just like this in the past too, always maintaining a calm and gentle persona.

“I’ve missed you, you know,” his tone suddenly got softer and quieter as he fixed his eyes on you. His words were laced with a sweetness that was almost hypnotic, it didn’t waver even when you tried to pay him no attention whatsoever. However, opposite to the comforting nature of his words, they made your heart painfully swell.

“Cut the shit Suguru,” you bursted, turning your full body towards him. “If you really cared about me you wouldn’t have left the way you did. For the past 8 months my mind has been filled with nothing but you. So don’t tell me you miss me.” In the heat of the moment, tears released from your eyes, carrying the remnants of your mascara down your cheeks with them. You helplessly tried to wipe them away. It was pathetic for you to cry in front of him you thought, but you could practically feel the guilt permeating from him.

“Tell Satoru his plan was stupid,” you sniffled as you got up and attempted to make your way to the door. The feeling of warmth returned to your wrist, as you turned to see Getou got up and stopped you. His grip wasn’t firm at all, it would be easy for you to get out of it with minimal effort– you just couldn’t bring yourself to do so. You stayed unmoving as he wrapped his arms around you, but this action triggered your tears to start again. Your head was buried in his chest as you silently sobbed, your arms laid limp at your side– too emotionally exhausted to even react to him saying he was sorry. “I hate that I missed you so much,” you weakly mumbled as you felt one of his hands caress your head in an effort to console you.

You shouldn’t be doing this— shouldn’t be here with him right now at this moment. You thought the flame that was once lit between you two had been permanently extinguished, but his touch ignited the spark all over again. You shouldn’t still love his touch the way you do. You shouldn’t still love him the way you do.

“I’ve already made an unforgivable mistake when leaving you once. I can’t let myself repeat that and let you go home by yourself in this state. Let me at least drop you at your place.”

Your conscience knew being dropped off by him was the best decision for you. Slowly pushing yourself away from his chest, you nodded as you took his hand yet again. He led you outside the club, into the now rain-filled night. The light from the moon illuminated his silhouette as he rushed you to his car. By the time you made it to his passenger seat, you were both slightly drenched from the rain. Only the patter of the rain could be heard throughout the ride, soothing you as your eyes slowly shut.

You woke up in the comfort of your bed, dressed up in a pair of your pajamas. The time of day was way later than you anticipated, unsurprising for how much you had drank last night. From the moment you opened your eyes, your head began throbbing. This is probably what Shoko wanted you to avoid– a nasty hangover. Stumbling out of bed, you immediately made your way down to the kitchen to get a glass of water.

“Why would you plan something like that and not tell me first? Imagine how bad that could have been for her,” you heard the voice of Shoko say. When you fully opened your eyes, you saw her, Gojo, and Getou all seated by the kitchen’s island table. They were too wrapped up in your conversation to realize you were there until you sat at the table with your glass of water.

“My head is killing me,” you groaned as the three looked over to you, startled by your sudden presence.

“Thanks for not doing the one thing I asked of you, Satoru,” Shoko mumbled. He threw his arms up defensively while utterly a slew of apologies. Being honest, you couldn’t be mad at him for it, as you were fully aware of how much you were drinking.

Getou sat across from you at the other side of the table. Neither of you said anything, or more or less looked at each other. The other two fell silent as they noticed this. Gojo gave Shoko the all knowing ‘we should let them talk it out’ look, to which she complied. “We’ll be back,” she said, her tone filled with annoyance. They both left out the front door.

The silence returned as soon as it left. Maybe you were both contemplating what to say first, tiptoeing around what would have been the most important topic of discussion— the feeling of you both missing each other.

“Did you sleep okay?” He was the first to speak. You hummed, nodding your head.

“Did you stay the night?” He nodded as you nonchalantly tapped on your glass of water. You both still didn’t have the heart to look at each other.

“I’m sorry,” he confessed. You looked up at him as he sat up.

“For what?” You weren’t trying to be snarky with your response. There was so much he could possibly be apologizing for, so you didn’t know exactly what to say.

“For everything. You don’t have to forgive me, but I am sorry.” His eyes were ridden with extreme guilt.

“A simple ‘I’m sorry’ isn’t going to fix everything. I just want to know why you did it,” you retorted as you crossed your arms.

“I felt like I wasn’t enough for you,” he explained. “I wasn’t sure I could continue giving you the love you deserved in the state I was in, and I didn’t want to hurt you, but that’s exactly what I ended up doing. In hindsight, I should have talked it out with you.” His perspective saddened you a bit, as you didn’t see the faults he saw in himself. You were happy as long as you were both together.

“I didn’t know you felt that way,” you answered in response. Quiet filled the room yet again as you both became drowned in your thoughts, long enough for Gojo and Shoko to return. They both didn’t say anything, but you could feel Gojo’s eyes stare at you in anticipation.

“I don’t want to give you the satisfaction of thinking your plan worked,” you rolled your eyes as you broke the silence. “Wanting us to be okay again is asking for a lot.” Your words caused a chain reaction of laughter starting with Gojo.

Even though you did mean what you said, you couldn’t help but enjoy this fleeting moment where everything seemed to be normal again. It was going to take a while for the group to return to this, maybe even forever. Yet with whatever happens, you hoped it would always be the four of you, together.

169 notes · View notes