#> coolg. back to nap. maybe write smthn else for barney

[waloeders]

haigh..mini pre-confession fic anyone?

this is susurrus/jupe, its set after the events of fs+the dlc and the other fic i never uploaded....oops. its fine, u'll get the gist of it. also will eventually merge this into the actual story + put it on my neocities lmao

cw: fors.poken spoilers (ofc), mentions of the total destruction of athia and death in general

"ugh, my head." jupiter mumbled out, pushing themself up off the floor onto all fours. in the corner of his eye, the shattered remains of some breakbeast, that he hadn't cared to learn the name of, crumbled back into dust once more.

the last, desperate, attack from it had sent them flat on the ground and he coughed heavily at the rising pressure in his chest.

"now, that was quite the blow..." susurrus let out something akin to a snort, the golden light on their arm thrumming in turn with each word he spoke, "still, no major damage. off you go!"

jupiter rolled their eyes, but quickly regretted it as pain shot through them, "fuck..."

"oh dear, are you alright?" he muttered, tone almost sarcastic in its' sincerity, "how about we just sit nice and quietly for a minute? you still have some of those healing drafts left, no?"

in response, they flopped down to the floor, rolling onto their back to stare into the star-covered nightsky. far above, the distant moons of athia watched as he reached up with one arm, as if to catch it.

"d'you see it too jill?" jupiter mimicked, letting out a snort of exhaustion and ignoring as tears welled up, "you have no idea how much this sucks, 'rus."

"you do know i feel what you feel? i know exactly how much this 'sucks'." susurrus snarked back.

"i meant... the fighting sucks. it hurts. i'm bad at it-"

"-i hadn't noticed-" he interrupted.

"-but athia is so...empty. broken. all this fighting, all this destruction, all this death... it's so much." they mumbled, twiddling a thin strand of gold between his fingers. it had pulled itself from where susurrus lay, embedded in his right arm, and was slowly expanding throughout his body.

some part of jupiter knew, someday it would overtake him - susurrus would overtake him and then... death, presumably. from what little he had learned, very few had ever been bound to the demon and those who had..

the lucky ones died.

"there's so much here i don't understand, so many questions i have. so much of this world, its people, the culture was lost, and for what? revenge?" they continued and shook their head, sighing, "sometimes i think it burns more - knowing the world used to be full - than this," they gestured to where susurrus' golden energy had expanded up to his neck, "whole thing."

he remained silent for a moment.

"it was my duty...-is my duty. athia and its' people had to be destroyed." there was a flatness to the way the demon spoke.

"does it have to be?"

it happened whenever 'rus repeated his orders, jupiter had noted, and the strange spark of hope that sometimes intertwined itself into their chest returned.

"not all of us can escape our fate, you know. some of us run towards it, not away." the demon declared, golden light flaring up around their wrist once more.

"fates not the same as duty." they remarked, "and just because its' our duty, doesn't mean it's right.

"but...what if...you could? just escape your duty, your fate? would you?"

an uncomfortable silence fell as he seemed to consider the question. and, as they stared up at the distant, unfamiliar stars, galaxies away from home, the blonde man's thoughts began to spiral, tears finally spilling out.

"...you should make for a Refuge, instead of lounging out here - its' not safe. there's one nearby." he spoke up in barely a whisper, releasing a trail of miniature golden birds that they had become familiar with.

jupiter sighed, mumbling "alright.." and moved to follow. it was unlikely 'rus would answer the question today, then, but a small smile still wound its' way to them - that he had considered it at all.

and if they noticed the way one of his birds lingered particularly close to them as they hobbled along, they didn't mention it.