#<- bc sex talk
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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im already at the south downs cottage guys, catch up
#good omens#ineffable husbands#aziraphale#crowley#they're nb in the flavour of being lesbian gay men bc its such a lesbian move to pine for someone for a few thousands years#and literally not make a move#PLUS u know when they have sex it takes like 9hrs and if you wrote what they did down on paper it really wouldnt look like much#but they still had to take intensity breaks bc they kept getting overwhelmed and then just making out for an hour#thank u for coming to my ted talk#high amounts of gender of all types happening all the time with these two
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Extremely bad batgirls comic I made featuring Steph's sex life and Cass' ability to read everything but the room
#dc comics#dc#stephanie brown#cassandra cain#batgirls#feels really wrong not tagging their ship here. they could be in an open relationship if you want#and Cass is either aspec or not down for sex for another reason and they've talked about it and whatnot#or it's just cass wingmaning steph#also those little scribbles in the bg are. vaguely circuit breaker and red canary BUT ONLY BC I BLANKED ON CHARACTERS-#-IN STEPH AND CASS' AGE GROUP WHO AREN'T GAY MEN OR TIM OR KON OR BART#i could've just had steph fuck a woman but i liked to imagine this could happen in canon. if DC were based (worse. much worse)#anyway normally i hate uploading bad drawings in poor quality but that just felt like the correct medium for this idea#I'm working on two dc for gaza Commissions rn and im a bit blocked w the lineart rn but we're truckin!
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before you know about women, you hear that you do not need to love the man, just that you need to love him through his manhood. which is to say you have seen the future painted in lamb's blood over your eyes - how your mother shoots you a look about your father's inability to cook right. how your aunt holds her wineglass and says i'm gonna kill em. men, right! how your best friend bickers with her boyfriend, how she says i can't help it. i come back to him.
you learn: men are gonna cheat. men aren't going to listen when you're talking, because you're nagging. men think emotions are stupid. they think your life is vapid and your hobbies are embarrassing. men will slam things, but that's because men are allowed to be angry. if you get loud, you're hysterical. if a man gets loud - well, men are animals, men are dogs, men can't control their hands or their eyes or their bodies. they're going to make a snide comment about you in the locker room, about your body, about how you're so fucking annoying. you're going to give him kids, and he will give you the money for the kids, and you're going to be running the house 24/7 - but he gets to relax after a long day, because his job is stressful. the man is on stage, and is a comedian, and says "women!"
and you are supposed to love that. you are supposed to love men through how horrible they are to you - because that's what women do. that's what good women do. wife material. your father even told you once - it'll make sense when you're older. it was like staring down a very lonely tunnel.
it feels like something's caught in your throat, but it's all you know, so. it's okay that you see sex as a necessary tool, a sort of okay-enough ritual to keep him happy, even though he doesn't seem to care about happiness as-applied-to you. it is relationship upkeep. it is kissing him and smiling even though he didn't brush his teeth. it is getting on your knees and looking up and holding back a sigh because he barely holds you as you panic through the night. it's not like the sex is bad and you do like feeling wanted. and besides! he's a man! like... they're another species. you'll never be able to actually communicate, right. he isn't listening.
you just don't get it. you don't feel that sense of i'm gonna climb him like a tree. mostly it just feels fucking exhausting. you play the part perfectly. you smile and nod and are "effortlessly" charming. and it's fine! it's alright! you even love him, if you're looking. you could have good life, and a good family, and perfectly happy.
in the late night you google: am i broken. you google i'm not attracted to my husband. you google i get turned on by books but not by him. you google how to get better in bed.
the first time he yells at you, it almost feels like blankness. like - of course this is happening. this is always how it was going to end up. men get angry, and they yell, and you sit there in silence.
you mention it to your friend - just the once - while you're drunk. she shrugs and says it's like that with me too, i just try to forget and move on. men are always gonna hear what they want to. pick your battles and say sorry even though he's in the wrong. you play solitaire online for a month. you go to your therapist appointment and preach about how you're both so in love.
after all, you have a future to want. nobody lied about it - how many instagram posts say marriage is hard. say real love takes work. say we fight like cats and dogs but the best part is that we always make up. how many of your friends say happy anniversary to the best and worst thing to ever happen to me. if you really loved him - loved yourself too - you'd accept that men are just different from you.
the first time she kisses you, it's on a dare at a party. something large and terrifying whips through your body. you wake up sweating from dreams where her mouth is encrusted with pearls and you pick them off one by one with your teeth. fuck. you sit at the computer and your almost-finished game of sim city. you think about your potential perfect life and your potential future family. you google am i gay quiz with your little hands shaking.
you delete each letter slowly. you don't need to love him. you just need to keep going.
#warm up#writeblr#this is also about being ace btw#my identity has slowly shifted over time and maybe if everyone is REAL cool i'll talk bout it#bc it's complicated and nuanced. but this is like#trying to warn u that if you find it “relationship upkeep” to have sex with ur partner#and don't actually enjoy it or seek it for urself. u might just not be attracted to them.#which is fine ! ace ppl can be perfectly happy in any relationship they feel good in!#but also i wasn't as straight as i had expected!#> the first time i saw dick i was like. huh. oh okay that's fine i guess#> the first time i saw pussy i was like. WAIT ACTUALLY HANG ON I GET IT#i just assumed sex wasn't all it was cracked up to be ya know#but also like. btw? this IS NOT saying ''u might be gay not ace''#bc tbh i'm grey ace/demisexual#it's saying u might not be into ur partner. explore urself & ur feelings. turn inward.#TAKE THIS IN THE MANNER IT WAS MEANT> GENTLE AND KIND#AND NOT IN A WEIRD INTERNET WAY PLEASE#bc the truth is that there ARE ppl who are gay who assume that they just ''don't like'' sex#and ace ppl who might need a different partner w/different needs#and i would have REALLY needed to hear ''check in w/urself about if u actually like sex''#WAY EARILIER in my life. but nobody said anything bc they assume if ur having sex. u like it.#not just the actual act of sex. not once ur turned on. do you ACTUALLY like it. or is it a burden?#even if ur gay. check w/urself. maybe ur more ace than u realized. in which case. ADDITIONAL FLAG BB#i love collecting my flags. i'm at like 354 at this point#but also btw this is about how toxic relationships are SO normalized that u can be in one#and have everyone around u being like ''THATS JUST MEN LOL''
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I also don’t know how to tell you that equating the want to have a same sex pairing to wanting porn on screen is legit like actual homophobia
#Like lmao especially when Nadja and Laszlo are talking about how much they want to have sez every five minutes#They hear ‘I want canon Nandermo’ as ‘I want to see Nandermo to fuck on screen bc I’m a dirty degenerate’#That’s what they hear it’s evident in their interviews#It is HOMOPHOBIA to see it as dirty and oversexed as compared to opposite sex pairings#Nandermo#wwdits spoilers#WWDITS negativity
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yknow what. I wanna say: CSA and COCSA survivors are all incredible, but I also wanna give a shout out to ppl who were exposed to sexual stuff or had any kind of sexual experience as a kid that they either aren't comfortable labelling as or don't consider abuse, but they know it still fucking sucked and shouldnt have happened. Even if that changes later in life and you identify as a victim/surivor, it can be messy to have to imagine those labels applying to the ppl in ur life and that can take time.
The most important thing is to prioritize your recovery + health, and to support other victims + survivors.
#COCSA ment#CSA ment#This is like. V personal and venting (maybe over sharing)#It's. I'm going to be honest recent discussion really brought this back into my brain aaughhh. Not in a bad way necessarily#Just. I know I've had experiences that I think others might label this way and I struggle to really understand that#Beyond the gut feeling of ''it doesnt count'' there's the understand that I might be denying it bc of shame or even just. The fact I have#An internal definition of it that excludes myself. And that I don't want to imagine the other ppl as 'abusive' and I don't think they had#The intent to hurt me. And the fact in one situation I know none of us understood boundaries or consent bc we didn't#Actually talk with adults about what like. Sex and sexuality meant so all out fucking context was porn. And just idk#I have specific experiences but those Memorable Incidents were just part of a larger pattern of me learning Abt sex young#And then failing to get proper sex ed for years. And the internet. And the Fucking Internet#(fanfic is like. Anti sex ed. 70% just the fucking worst shit to internalize 30% ''hey this is actually Okay'')#Sex Ed... Like in school... Needs a fucking HEAVY overhaul but it's still better than nothing usually
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Put your clothes back on. I lied, I’m going to explain the entire lore of the ghost band. Including The Papas, the Music videos, movie, YouTube videos, stage moments and award ceremonies.
#I’m ace let’s talk my nerdy intrests instead#ghost band#the band ghost#ghost bc#ghost ghouls#rite here rite now#shitpost#I lied I don’t actually like sex
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im possessed
#ithiunk. huey born in america then lived in arg for a bit again then came back#so hes fluent in spanish+accustomed to culture but bc hal was kind of a sack of potatoes to him he never got any of that😭#hes more connected to his jewish heritage i think#daves always talking to him in spanish bc it pisses him off#otacon#hal emmerich#solid snake#otasune#snotacon#raiden mgs#mgs#metal gear solid#myart#bandana stays ON during sex#no sombrero for dave sorry. and otacons gauchofit is fucking lame MY BAD
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grooming is when *checks notes* we talk about the dangers of the sex industry
#radblr#obviously these ppl are groomers themselves who try spinning the narrative and making it seems like theyre heroes for silencing survivors#pls dont argue with them theyre so pathetic#if someone says u talking about ur trauma is grooming pls be very careful with them#darvo#talking about the dangers of sex industry especially in todays society is super brave#dont let them guilt trip u#also i hope many many ppl will see these ppls dumb takes bc that will only help others see them for who they are
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anyway deadpool & wolverine slapped and at the end of the film vanessa & wade get back together but they also get logan as their own boytoy/househusband. logan is not aware of this.
#deadpool and wolverine#deadpool 3#wade wilson#deadpool x wolverine#deadpool movie#vanessa deadpool#logan howlett#in my mind i have a fanfiction#that starts with vanessa and wade talking about wade moving in with vanessa and logan is also there and he is very confused as to why#they seem to be waiting for his decision#but bc he cares about wade and vanessa and wants them to be happy#hes like yeah sure whatever#and moves in with them as well#and then takes the spare bedroom#much to wade & vanessa's confusion#and it all comes to a head when vanessa sits him down to ask why hes not participating in the relationship since they moved in#bc they're fine with him not liking physical affection and sex or whatever and she understands that his fighting with wade is his form of#affection and logan bluescreens in a 'we could have been having sex this entire time'#and 'were dating??????' way#will i write it?#who knows#not me#deadpool spoilers
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i dont think yall understand how floored i was when i found out that the interview with the vampire books are actually incredibly erotically gay for real and not just light queercoding or fan's gay ships?? bc this changes everything. i had always assumed anne rice hated fanfic authors for making her male characters fuck, but no, she just wanted to be the only author making her male characters fuck
#i think this is why a lot of people (including me) were initially shocked by the show being so explicitly queer too#bc i can't be the only one who didnt know much abt iwtv and assumed rice's issue with fanfic was the gay sex#and then during the promotions u had interviewers being like 'wow this a very queer interpretation! why is that!'#and poor iwtv fan club president sam reid has to be like well the books are already queer you buffoon#i feel like this is a weird internet myth that needs to be busted#i even remember seeing a hit post on here when s1 came out that was like 'did they have to wait for anne rice to die to make this'#when she's actually credited as an executive producer#LMAO#anyways#alex talks#interview with the vampire#iwtv#lestat de lioncourt#louis de pointe du lac#the vampire armand#the vampire claudia#daniel molloy#anne rice#.txt
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"claiming any writer ever intended to write that jason was sexually assaulted as a child is stealing from mia" is still one of the most ridiculous takes i have ever seen. by the way
#winick: hey i like this character. im going to resurrect him from the dead after 20 yrs. i'm going to have him go out of his way to tell mia#he thinks theyre similar. when she denies that he knows her enough to make such a claim i'm going to make him bring up her past as a victim#of SA specifically to prove he knows her past well and is still saying they are similar. and then i will make him say he also had to do bad#things to survive on the street.#people: clearly this writer who likes jason wrote him mocking mia for being a victim of SA!#if you think this could possibly imply him having faced SA then you hate women. obviously.#be serious. this is me just using GA seeing red. not talking abt bftc or how winick also wrote jay's first kill to be a sex trafficker or#how his dialogue following that was a callback to judy. i'm not even making the argument that jason necessarily has to have this history in#every interpretation of him! bc ofc he doesnt most writers never even hinted at this#but you cannot whine about mia's story being “stolen” by fans when fans are simply looking at published canon#mia ends that fight without any serious injuries after jay spent the entire thing giving her what HE thought was solid advice (was it?#well no. but HE thought it was) and you want to pretend his intention was to psychologically torture her using the SA she faced?#i can appreciate dedication to being a hater but i draw the line at being intentionally stupid. you dont even have to agree on winick#implying anything abt jay's past but you cannot say he was mocking her
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????? hello???
#fake flirting for information = comparing her to your sister apparently#ik we all talk about the opening scene#where sam's like sitting in the car lowkey watching dean have sex#and rightfully so bc wtaf is that#BUT#also what the fuck is this#emma rewatches spn#3x01 the magnificent seven#spn#wincest#samdean
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… :/
#i wish people would stop making well-intentioned positivity posts to support stone bottoms/pillow princesses that are just scolding ppl#for ‘not respecting our boundaries.’ like yeah it’s partly about boundaries but it’s way more about how sex and topping is viewed as labor#and therefore must be reciprocal to be moral. shit talking pillow princesses is so common in the queer community bc it is perceived to be#the MORAL stance. scolding ppl as if this is a purely interpersonal matter of ‘respecting boundaries’ is not shifting anything babes#sex is only labor when it’s sex work. if you think topping is a chore you shouldn’t be doing it. this is what we need to be saying to ppl#but anyways. i know these posts come from a good place but goddamn. why does the way i like to have sex need to be a ‘boundary’#shit like this makes me never wanna have sex again bc i genuinely don’t wanna hook up w someone who’s just trying to ‘respect my boundary’#i want to hook up with someone who actually wants to have sex with me!! the way i like to have sex!!! the fuck!!!!#delete later#ugh sorry im. in a mood 😣
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there's something so odd yet fascinating about how fanworks for mxtx's books tend to misinterpret the literal protagonists of her stories more than any other characters
#keri chats#mxtx#scum villain's self saving system#mo dao zu shi#tian guan ci fu#my extremely watered down hypothesis: it's the Yaoi Bottom Protagonist Effect#fans often hit shen qingqiu with the Isekai Transmigrator Identity Crisis beam or Returnee Angst beam#but he canonically doesn't think of himself as “shen yuan” or yearn for his og family even once across the years he's been in PIDW verse#he likes where he is now & is kinder n friendlier w his peak lord peers than ppl realize. it's not a ruse or acting. he's really like that!#wei wuxian... i could fit 50 essays on him alone tbh i've talked abt him in other posts & mostly blame c/q/l for the characterization hell#xie lian objectively got hit hardest by the yaoi sub fanon beam LMAO he's inexperienced w romance and sex but not... not like that#xie lian is a lying liar who lies. he tricks and mocks people. pretends not to know things. a smart weapon-loving martial god#xie lian doesn't easily share his thoughts even with the reader bc of how badly he's been hurt. but he sees all the signs of love#and he knows what he desires. he just takes a very very long time to feel comfortable acting on it#mdzs#tgcf#svsss#danmei
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It actually makes perfect sense that Ozzie is into consent. He‘s a demon, after all.
Let me explain.
If you think about it, there aren‘t actually many stories of either demons or fairies or any other kind of trickster ever forcing humans into anything.
They are going to fuck you over, sure, but they usually let YOU make a mistake first.
They bargain, goad you on, trick you.
The devil builds a bridge, he doesn‘t just abduct your firstborn. The fairies put food in front of you, they don‘t force you to eat. Succubi feed off your sexual energy, they don‘t magically make you horny.
Sin/transgression/damnation has to be a choice to mean anything.
See also: Nearly every horror movie ever. If that kid hadn‘t gone into the creepy attic (literal transgression), he wouldn‘t be possessed. If the camp counsellors hadn‘t been either fucking or pranking people, they wouldn‘t be getting axed.
The snake couldn‘t just shove the apple into Eve‘s mouth while she was sleeping, either.
Of course a demon would be interested in having consent on all sides. That‘s more people sinning, after all.
(And for the few weirdos who use Raphael from bg3 as an example of how evil a real demon should be… What is his big thing again…? Starts with c, ends with ontracts…?)
#and we‘ll not even talk about how marriage only really became a sacrament around 1500 bc for the church every kind of sex was sin#and the fact we had to have sex to make more humans was one of the greatest calamities of human existence#even enjoying having sex with your spouse absolutely used to be a sin#seriously you guys should read some of the church fathers they‘re a riot#helluva boss#helluva boss asmodeus#helluva boss ozzie
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