#< cataloguing my xp w this breakup<3

[earthangel]

very very happy bc yesterday i went to my therapy apptmt & he told me i ‘said some really interesting things’ & that i am ‘resilient’ & have developed ‘resilience & transformational skills’ & i’m a lil bit on a ego boots rn sjbwsj

more seriously, he also validated all of my feelings & the thoughts i’ve bene having about this last rship: like me realizing my ex had a pretty fatalistic mindset which destroyed chances of rship repair & connection through communication, realizing he stonewalled a lot, realizing he didn’t seek growth together as much as i did which is a big reason why the rship ended the way it ended & when it ended. like i was RIGHT. i was not too dramatic or too much or too intense, i was experiencing frustration that my partner wasn’t willing to build emotional intimacy w me!

he’s moving onto someone else & as i’ve told him, the same is going to happen, the exact same things. but now i truly don’t worry about it anymore, nor do i feel the need to prove that i was/am/will be right, bc i know that’s the case & the ppl around me know that’s the case, & that’s all that matters to me.

i don’t resent him as much as thought i would, simply bc that emotion has no future. i’m focusing on my own mindset, & the reason why i let the rship go on for as long as it did (which was definitely lack of emotional boundaries!)

i’ve been learning a LOT & i’ve also been imposing boundaries btwn me & him instead of catering to his feelings.

i’m so proud of myself. i’ve made a good choice when i decided to focus on my own personal growth & who i want to be as an individual & as a partner. the choices i’ve made ever since the breakup happened are showing me how much of an adult i am becoming. i’m so so proud of myself & i wish this same sense of self-fulfillment to anyone who’s reading.