#;;OOC

[soulstagger]

A little personal

Last night was not a great night for me, both with just usual lingering insecurity you might get from social media, and some worldly woes about the state of things and how plans for a trip into the us later in the year might be upended by a weak Canadian dollar.

Those all paled in comparison to a realization last night that, all my family are out of town for a month or two as usual this time of year. But for the first time instead of me being alone with a little family nearby, I am entirely alone. Because in the Years prior my grandparents were always around and I always had someone to talk to, my grandparents were the two who understood me the most in the world.

A few years prior my grandma passed away and then finally last year my grandfather did, and it just hit me last night that I really was that alone. But such a thing is so heavy that to put that on people randomly would he unfair. Something that is kind of reserved for best friends but even then it's not like they could do anything, it was just a night of such crushing extreme sadness but I tried to just push it all away.

In the end I am not that good at that, the kindness people showed in seeing even a small post of mine I tried to balance between welcoming it and ensuring that no one dug too deep because I just wasn't in a state to do so.

That resulted in some lapse of judgment where I opened up a little and then promptly slammed the door on people's faces because I got terrified.

Even worse I hurt people from it, people who probably didn't know how bad things were and the following conversations late at night probably didn't help because I was in such a mess and I couldn't even address everything they were worried about.

Even now this morning I don't think I'm any better, I miss my grandparents, I feel alone and isolated, and I feel again that sharing and being weak isn't allowed from me. I say this all because I just want anyone to know last night I'm sorry if I was purposely dismissive of your support, sorry if I chose the wrong words, I didn't mean any of it.

I don't want my problems to become anyone else's problems, that's why I try never to share things. But I'm weak and even I want people to care, I want someone to care about me but only so much because I'm just too afraid to let anyone in that far.

So I apologize for last night. I hope this grants some insight to people as to why it was hard for me to talk to you and perhaps why some of the push back on my responses simply put me in a position where I could not help you back.

I'm sorry for letting you down.

I'll try to be better.

[nerditudes]

🔥 go on then

UNPOPULAR OPINIONS

If your aesthetics are OVER SATURATED or CONTRASTED to the point where barely anything can be made out, what is the fucking point of it anyway?

I'm blind. I've had the use of one eye my entire life, and the good eye is doing his best. As such my capacity for seeing light/shadow is far less than someone who has binocular vision. I'm pulling from one camera, not two.

I HATE going to themes and barely being able to make shit out. If I've followed you, there's a 99% chance I had to look at your page on mobile by swapping the URL around to get a more accessible view at what you do. Because some of these theme aesthetics are garbled and impossible to navigate.

What's the fucking point of having images where you can barely make out the character? Like I wanna SEE THAT FUCKER why are you HIDING THEM underneath that garbled visual mess?

Your graphics are yours-- again this is just an opinion and one I've had for a while as a visually impaired/blind writer on here. I'm so tired of inaccessible blogs. I don't interact with inaccessible blogs.

[soulflatter]

The big fill...

[woodblxssomcrowned]

"The Uchiha are the worst clan!"

"The Senju are the worst clan!"

They are both clans of contract killers who are born and raised to commit various war crimes against each other and other people including children for money under the pretence of love, loyalty and revenge and are equally willing to sacrifice their young and treat their own members and loved ones with great cruelly, physical and emotional abuse and manipulation to make sure they do it well sit the hell down

[subjectivemortality]

when another Salmon blog follows me

[adventurepunks]

Mini-starter call

;;Got the rest of the week off and only 2 more drafts to go so like this for a starter from either Roy or Talia as they're the only icons I have saved on this laptop.

[kamikotized-a]

It’s my son @yangnoir’s birthday! I have been very generous with his gift (ball pits are rare ever since the Supreme banned them in the 90s).

[mistralxsoul]

//okay so here's the deal (vent below)

Okay so apologies for slow replies. Like genuinely very very very sorry. I'm trying my best but I'm fighting the world right now and it's very difficult for me to focus on replies right now.

1) I got into a car accident some time ago and I've been fighting for my life trying to get the car repair set up, which has been stressing me out

2) I'll be working from home this week and usually one would think I can work on replies better this way. Absolutely not, idk what it is but I just can't focus on writing when I'm at home.

3) currently fighting off a lot of pain, fatigue, crippling depression and anxiety. I barely have the energy to write this post. I'm not sleeping and I'm not eating like I'm supposed to. I'm just a wreck.

So. Sorry if I can't get replies out fast enough, if at all. I guess technically I'm still semi-active but yeah. Not doing that great guys I'm sorry.

[project115]

⭐️

Hoo boy, there are two species for Alexander to pick between because of their special qualities. Grarrl and Skeith.

Aesthetically, the Darigan Skeith fits him but personality wise, the Royal Boy Grarrl fits him just as well.

[hellishtransmissions]

Muse Added

Meet RAVEN

Standing at 5'0" and an absolute menace to society, this Overlord spends most of his time in the Forest. He hates water.

[greenxprof]

|| Just a simple doodle because I don't feel too well today. Green Oak timeline :3

[soulstagger]

What threads are you craving right now? - A friendo

Off the top of my head? Touhou wise.

Celune's wandering far to openly in Gensokyo and no one's bullied her. Pathetic!

People should let Micuccia teach them the weave, so they can have lots of fun and set up stuff later!

I keep trying to throw Marie Marisa into bad situations but all those threads die, this guilt filled Alternate Marisa needs bad happenings!

General touhou stuff is also fine, most of them have stuff on going anyways so I'm not too concerned. I do need an excuse to make more Tojiko icons so some more stuff with her might be neat.

Neche Machi is stuck in gensokyo, she's just a nice innocent dog girl. Let her make something for you, or better yet help her remember what she had to do when she arrived. She totally forgot that she had a task to do to set up a dream bridge.

Mao. Spooder good girl, caused an incident long time ago. Should of been put to death, wasn't. Now she gets to play again, you should play with a slightly unhinged but well meaning spider. And by play I also mean muses with bad intentions should abuse that fragile mind.

[nerditudes]

Personally, I think this is hilarious. But I’ve also been told my humor is “Tumblr coded”. Whatever that means.

DISCO GIRL INTENSIFIES

[soulflatter]

Time for Meimei to handle an anxious Flan it seems.

[woodblxssomcrowned]

Sometimes I can't help but think that most of tge time having those obcenely large scrolls serves no purpose other than a flex, unless it's actual information written on them like medical texts or instructions like the scroll of seals which are intended to be studied outside of combat or not at all.

Like, it's shown several times that the physical size of a seal does not affect its function. A tiny seal on a scroll that fits in your back pocket can hold a lake's worth of water, multiple weapons, a few dead bodies, a demon etc etc.

Those big scrolls has to weigh a ton and really can't be actually practical to use in combat

But the do look *very* cool as a design element I admit that