#//hes emotionally stunted all he knows is be a brat and follow orders

[ring-of-galactic]

..I still don't know what I'm supposed to be doing. What's my task. I'm confused.

[bronzewool]

Charl’s Top 10 Problematic ships:

Aoba x Mink - Noncon of the highest order. Not even the English censorship could make this game any less problematic. But its OK because Mink actually cares about Aoba. So that makes everything he did to him OK…not really?

Will Graham x Hannibal Lector - Dracula & Vampire Chronicles combined but dial everything up to 11. Now with even more murder, even more gaslighting, even more baby trapping, and cannibalism. :3

Count Dracula x Jonathan Harker - Held his own solictor hostage in his castle for several months, threw out his only shaving mirror, stole his clothes and framed him for babynapping, gas lighted him and casually mocked his helplessness to do anything about it, didn’t even have the courtesy to eat Jonathan himself and left him for his brides. Dick.

Lestat de Lioncourt x Louis de Pointe du Lac - Stalking your crush from a distance because he looks like your dead ex-lover and calling it “fatefully falling in love at first sight”, gaslighting said crush into eternal damnation marriage, baby trapping said crush so he won’t leave you (spoilers it did not fix their marriage), withholding vital information about vampirism because you don’t know jackshit about vampire culture and won’t admit it because you know he will dump your fine ass.

Satoru x Yashiro (Yashisato) - Murdered his student’s classmates and then his mum just to cover his own tracks. Underaged shotacon due to time travel shenangigans (Yashiro never learns Satoru is an adult trapped in a 10yo’s body), obsesses over said comatosed kid for 15 years and then tries to commit a lovers suicide in the manga after he wakes up.

Jinx x Silco (Jilco) - Unhealthy coping mechanisms from an emotionally stunted adult who had been betrayed by his brother and encourages his ward into following said unhealthy coping mechanism in order to deal with her own past trauma. Spoilers, it does not work and just encourages her self destructive tendencies.

Madoka x Homura (Homumado) - Unhealthy attachment for your senpai who keeps sacrifcing herself in every timeline no matter how many times you try and stop her. Steals your senpai’s powers and traps her inside your demon form because you would rather have her all to yourself then actually try and save the world.

Akira Fudo x Ryo Asuka - One is technically a devilman, the other is lucifer himself. They are forever doomed to be best friends who will bring about a war between heaven and earth that will end with both of them losing and all of humanity dying as a result of their relationship.

Sarah Williams x Jareth the Goblin King - She’s a 15yo larper and he’s an ageless fey creature probably centuries old. Kidnapped her baby brother and threatened to turn him in a goblin. Actually said the line “Fear me, love me, do as I say, and I will be your slave.” Honestly, she should have just accepted the offer. Dumb brat

Joker x Harley Quinn - The OG problematic ship. Stop pretending you didn’t ship it too. I know you did. Being woke will not erase your sins.

[squirrelly831]

Making Up With Mom [Jongup and Junhong]

This follows the Child Makes Mom Cry. Junhong’s is super long... I apologize for that. I may edit later... I wrote this at 1 am and half asleep. 

Enjoy

Jongup

If it wasn’t one thing with Maddy, it was another. Between dealing with her daughters’ rebellious streak, she was under pressure with her small home craft shop and finances. Her work load had all but doubled and she regretted a little too late when she agreed to take on so many clients at once. Along with her shop, she was also struggling to send steady funds to her parent’s who had fallen on hard times with the farm. 

Of course, Maddy confided in her husband about the pressure she felt, but she didn’t voice how emotionally overwhelmed she felt. But, she didn’t need to say it, Jongup knew... Not only him, but their twins, Hana and Dana could tell something was wrong with their mom. Maddy was vocal and high spirited, so when they caught their mom zoning out and forcing a smile, the girls worried. Especially Dana who had always been closer to her mom when she was younger.

So, one day while their mom was out buying material for projects, the girls decided to ask their dad about their mom. They found him stretched out on the couch in their living room, his eyes shut as he relaxed. Dana swallowed hard as she took a step to her dad,  “Hey dad.” Jongup’s eyebrow rose for a second as he let out a hum in response, his eyes still shut. “We were wondering... what’s wrong with mom?”

Jongup let out a sigh as he opened his eyes and glanced at the twins, “Why do you want to know?” His voice was cold. The girls shrunk back slightly knowing he was still upset with them for the stunt they had pulled a couple days prior.

Hana bit her bottom lip as she sucked in a breath, “Because she’s our mom... I know what I--what we said was horrible... We don’t like seeing mom sad.”

Jongup sat up on the couch as he scratched the back of his neck, “You didn’t have that hard of a time seeing her sad when you were disrespectful to her a couple days ago, Hana.” Her head fell forward as she glanced down at her feet. Dana wrapped her arms around herself as she tried to make herself smaller than she already was. The two of them fell into an awkward silence as Jongup stared at them. Eyeing them long enough, Jongup cleared his throat, “Sit and I’ll tell you.” The girls sucked in a breath as they took a seat on either side of their dad.

After getting a short summary of their mom’s stress, the girls set out to make plans to cheer their mom up. Maddy did everything in her power to cheer up the twins and now it was their turn. The girls told their dad about their plans and after getting the okay, the girls got everything together.

Maddy had decided to spend a day at Mia’s bookstore to get her mind off her stress and didn’t return home until about 4. She unlocked the front door, but paused outside the door. She felt heaviness weighing on her once more and she heaved a sigh. Her tears swelled in her eyes and Maddy let out a silent curse as she looked up to keep them from falling. “Get it together” she gave her cheeks a couple of slaps before she opened the front door. “I’m home...” Her voice no higher than a mouse. 

There were heavy footsteps heading her way. She took off her shoes and shrugged off her jacket as the twins appeared before her slightly out of breath. “Welcome home!” They grinned.

Maddy cautiously placed the jacket in the hall closet as she eyed her two daughters who had ignored her existence since the grounding. “Thank you?” 

Dana stepped forward and held out her arms to her mom, “Can I have a hug?” Maddy shut the closet door before she approached her youngest and hugged her. Dana tightened her grip around her mom and pressed her head into Maddy’s upper chest. “Your hugs are always the best” Dana whispered before she pulled away from her mom. 

Hana stood there awkwardly for a moment before she cleared her throat, “Come on, we got the house to ourselves. Dad is staying at Uncle Daehyun’s place for the night.” She headed into the living room followed by Dana who pulled their mom with her. 

Maddy entered the living room to see pillows thrown out on the floor, lights strung up above with sheets hanging over the pillows like curtains in front of their tv. “TA-DA!” 

“What’s all this?” Maddy chuckled weakly.

Hana looked back at her mom and gave her a kind smile, “Mommy Daughter night? It’s been some time since we’ve done it. We ordered pizza and decided that we should watch the Notebook--and any other movie you want too.” 

“We wanted to apologize for our behavior too, but we didn’t know how.” Dana shuffled her feet, “We didn’t want to--Hey, wait why are you crying, mom?” 

Hana’s and Dana’s eyes widened as they saw tears fall down their mom’s face. Hana froze up seeing her mom’s tears. Maddy reached up quickly and wiped the tears away only to be replaced with more. She let out a pathetic chuckle, “I don’t know... I’m sorry, girls. I don’t mean to c--” Maddy was cut off by her oldest suddenly throwing her arms around her. 

“We didn’t mean to make you cry again. We just wanted to see you smile again” Hana’s words were rough as she spoke. “I’m really sorry for being such a terrible daughter.” 

“Hey now” Maddy tsked as she pulled away from Hana who had her own tears, “I don’t have terrible daughters. Bull headed and very stubborn, yes, but not terrible.” Maddy reached out and wiped the tears on her daughter’s face. “A terrible daughter wouldn’t build a pillow fort and kick their dad out the house for a night to be with their mom. I appreciate this, really.” Dana approached them and Maddy immediately reached out to pat her head. 

That night, while watching their movie marathon, Maddy found herself fast asleep with her daughters on either side of her cuddle up close to her.

Junhong

“Are you sure? I really don’t want the kids to try to take advantage of you again” Junhong repeated for the umpteenth time that hour. “I can at least take the twins. I’ll be with Christian and he really likes having them around.” His arms circled around his wife and closed around her abdomen. His head rested on her shoulder before he pressed a kiss against her neck. 

Kiara hummed as she pushed around the stir-fry in the pan before her. “I’m fine, babe. If I have a problem I can call Deja. If you want to release your album on time, you need to focus on it.” She leaned back against his chest and looked up at him. The unsure expression on his face was hard to miss and she couldn’t help the smile that graced her lips. She turned off the surface before she shimmied around in his arms to face him. She reached up a hand to him and her thumb brushed against his cheek, “Trust me, yea? They’re my kids too. I should know how to parent at this point.” It would be a lie if Kiara wasn’t a bit nervous being with their kids alone for a couple weeks again. She knew how her kids were on their worse behavior and she felt powerless as they had walked all over her. However, she also knew Junhong couldn’t be the only disciplinary...

Junhong gave her a warm smile before he pecked her lips, “Okay, but you know I’m a call away. I’ll drop my music if I need to for you, okay?” He pulled her closer and kissed her again and again.

Kiara let out a laugh, “Okay, just go before Christian blames me for you taking forever.” Junhong gave her one last kiss before he headed out the door. 

One Saturday, Kiara was preparing to leave for work when the babysitter called out due to an illness. She got off the phone with a stressed look on her face as her oldest entered the kitchen.

“Mornin�� momma” Grace pressed a kiss on her mom’s cheek before heading to the coffee.

“Yea, you too dear--”

Grace pulled out her mug and turned back to her mom, “What’s wrong, mom?” She frowned as she poured herself a cup of coffee. 

“Babysitter cancelled. I guess I could take the twins to work with me” she sighed knowing how much of a time crunch she would be under just trying to get them to wake up. “I’ll have to cancel my first appointment at least” she picked up her phone once more.

“Whoa whoa!” Grace placed her mug on the counter before she rushed to her mom’s side, “Don’t do that. Mattie and I can watch them.” Kiara shook her head almost immediately causing her daughter’s frown to deepen. “Look mom, I know Mattie and I have been shit kids--”

“Language.”

“My bad my bad” Grace held up her hands with a sheepish smile on her lips. “We can watch two seven year olds. Take them to the park or call Aunt Elfie and have play dates--Oh or call Aunt Kate or Auntie Sisi. We’ll be fine, mom. Trust us.”

Kiara’s lips pursed as she thought about the idea. Her brow creased in response, “I would have agreed to this before, but after last time--”

“Let us prove it to you then. If we screw up this time, then you can never trust us again.” Grace approached her mom, “You can’t take the twins to work. They won’t stay still for hours on end and your customers will want to relax...” 

"Wake up, idiot” Grace tossed a pillow at her brother’s sleeping face startling him awake. 

Matthew shot up in his bed as he fumbled for his glasses in a panic, “What the actual fuck is wrong with you?” He growled when he saw his sister leaning against his doorway. 

“We’re in charge of the twins today and I’m not going to be alone when they wake up” she shrugged. “I need help making them breakfast.”

His face twisted with displeasure, “Just feed them stupid cereal.” 

Grace’s arms crossed as she stomped over to Matthew’s bed, “Look here, Mattie” she grabbed his roughly by the collar. “We really hurt mom last time she was home alone with us. I think we at least owe it to her to make it up to her. Or did you enjoy having mom so upset with us that she was crying...”

A flicker of sadness flashed across Matthew’s face as his head fell forward. He was silent for a moment before he let out an irritated sigh, “Jesus, okay--I’ll help watch the stupid brats.” Grace’s lips pulled to the side as she released her brother and headed out his room victoriously. 

That night, Kiara dragged herself up the walkway to her front door. Her half day at work had turned out to be a grueling ten hour work day. Even Deja was upset that she didn’t just turn down last minute clients, but Kiara heard and saw the desperation for the women. How could she have said no? She paused when she saw her two youngest waiting at the door in their pajamas. 

Aaron was the first to notice her as his moth grew into a wide grin. “Mommy!! MOMMY!” He hollered as Andrew and he bolted to their mom. 

Kiara bent down and caught the two runners. She let out a chuckled as she felt some of her energy return as she held her boys tightly, “What on earth are you two doing out here?”

Andrew pulled away first and rubbed his nose, “Mattie and Gray have surprise for you!” Kiara released Aaron as she stood up once more feeling the aches in her back.

“BIG SURPRISE!” Aaron jumped as his arms shot out over his tiny body. The twins took her hands and lead her to the front door. Aaron opened the front door and poked his head inside, “Momma’s home!” He screamed.

Matt rolled his eyes from the kitchen, “Yea, we couldn’t tell by you screaming outside.” He tossed down the dish towel as he headed into the entrance. “You should go take a bath. Everything will be done soon.” He stated in a matter of fact manner. “And the bath is as hot as the fire gates of hell because I am rightfully convinced all women have risen from such a place.” 

Grace swatted him as she clicked her tongue to her teeth, “Whenever you talk, you always say unnecessary stuff.” She flashed her mom a smile as she nudged Matt back to the kitchen. “Welcome home! Go wash up please. We still need some time.”

Kiara eyed her daughter as she gave a slow nod, “Okay... I’ll be back in a bit.” She gave her daughter a quick hug as she headed to her bedroom. Upon entering her bedroom, she saw petals leading from the entrance of her room to the bathroom. Kiara let out a gasp as she followed the petals to a dimly lit bathroom. Her favorite lavender scented bath bomb had overtaken the smell of the room. Resting on the counter was a wine glass with her favorite wine and a note. She picked up the note and read it:

Enjoy your bath! No need to hurry--and no we didn’t drink our wine.

Mattie

After the bath, Kiara made her way downstairs to see Matt waiting for her at the bottom of the stairs. Matt had his usual scowl on his lips, “Grace said to close your eyes and I’ll lead you to the dining room or whatever.” Matt watched his mom take her final step off the stairs and ushered her to close her eyes. He took her hand in his as he guided her into the dining room. Once he situated her where she needed to be, he stepped away, “You can open your eyes--you know if you want to or you know whatever...” 

Kiara’s eyes fluttered open as she looked in front of her. Her eyes widened as she saw an array of her favorite foods on the table with a pie in the middle. She let out a gasp as she took in the sight. “What’s all this for?” 

The kids took their seats as Grace reached over to touch her mom’s hand, “Our apology for being so rude last time dad was gone... We didn’t know how else to show you we were sorry, so we called Aunt Elfie and she sent us recipes of things Nana made you in the past. Mattie made the apple pie.”

Matt looked down at his empty plate to hide the reddening in his cheeks, “You don’t have to go and tell her all that...” His eyes glanced over at his mom’s and he squirmed in his seat. “But yea, sorry I acted rude... I shouldn’t have done that...” 

“Yea, we’re sorry too!” Aaron grinned.

“Idiot... I doubt you know what you are even apologizing for” Matt tsked earning a kick from Grace.

“At least he apologized, stop being a jerk” she hissed. The two glared at one another from across the table earning a laugh from their mom.

She pressed her hand to her mouth, “Let’s just say prayers and eat, yea?” Reluctantly, Grace and Matt agreed still glaring at one another before they bowed their heads to pray.

Part I ||  Part II

Credit to gif owners

Written & revamped by Squirrelly831

♕ REQUEST

☮ B.A.P MASTERLIST

∞ ULTIMATE MASTERLIST

[jermaine-main]

What it’s really like to be in a Dom/sub relationship

I accidentally crossed paths with my first Dominant online when I was going through a divorce seven years ago. My first thought was to run away fast: He must be some whip-toting freak with a dungeon in his basement.

Fast-forward to today and I have three Dominant/submissive (D/s) relationships behind me (though I’ve had vanilla relationships, too), and I can honestly say that each relationship built on the former and has taught me profound things about my body, myself, and even life.

With so much controversy and misinformation, which I’ve written about before, out there around what D/s is and isn’t, I want to offer up a glimpse into the REAL world of D/s. Here are the answers to the most popular questions I’ve been asked.

1. What do you enjoy most about D/s?

What appeals to me the most is the intense cerebral connection — the mind play and the feelings it conjures in me, sometimes all day long (the brain is, after all, the biggest sex organ). The words, the orders, the reprimands, the tone and the downright audacity for him to say it all: Never would I allow anyone else to speak to me in this way, or, over all, to have such deep access into my mind, body and heart

And I hear myself responding in ways that similarly shock me — from mouthy and totally improper to meek and pleasing or with no air in my lungs at all. All the while I feel with my mind, heart and full body, the anticipation, the fear, the exposure, my power, his control and protection, desire and love. Through the D/s dynamic, I not only feel more alive and aware of my sexuality/sensuality, I learn and own more of myself.

2. I’ve heard of “punishment and discipline” being used in D/s relationships: What does that look like?

I can only explain this from my perspective, so I’ll have to back up a bit:

I have many different aspects to my personality. For the most part, I’m pretty straight-laced: responsible, hard-working, kind, thoughtful, capable, organized, (boring). Maybe it’s my upper middle-class, good girl upbringing at work, I don’t know.

But some parts of me itch to go outside the lines, and those parts are bitchy, aggressive, sly, daring, bold, manipulative, and even, I’d say, immature. This is where “Delaine The Brat” comes out in the D/s relationship — and boy does she love to push.

For some people, this is where S&M comes into play. For others, it’s bondage and/or spanking and/or kink. It could even involve humiliation and standing in the corner like a berated child. The submissive never knows ‘exactly’ what her Dom is going to do and the slight fear of the unknown can be erotic. That being said, she should always know that she is safe and won’t be pushed outside her limits physically, mentally or emotionally. If this happens and she immediately wants it to stop, she can call out a mutually agreed upon “safe word. As for me, the best way to make me behave is to ignore me.

3. But why, as a grown woman, would you possibly want to behave so childishly?

It’s not all the time, it’s just sometimes. And I don’t know the exact answer. Why do you sometimes crave tomatoes on rye bread while I feel like grilled cheese on white? Why does it even matter if we both enjoy a good meal and are both satisfied and unharmed in the end?

All I know is that some part of me is attracted to strong, decisive, creative, powerful men who also possess the Dom ‘skill set’ (a topic for another article). And when I’m around that energy and reminded of it, I like how it makes me feel as a woman and sexual being. It’s not that I think I’m not all of those things too, but something inside of me is appeased and awakened when I feel that in the company of my partner.

4. Why didn’t you explore D/s before you got divorced?

Looking back, all I can say is that the mundaneness of raising three kids within a stable, predictable, domestic life and marriage squashed my interest in sex beyond the requisites. Only when I became single again at age 37 did I realize how much my sexual desire rouses when my mind and imagination are consistently engaged and challenged. A D/s relationship offers me that.

5. What do you want women to know most about D/s?

First, D/s is first and foremost a PART of a relationship, but it’s not everything the relationship is. You need to be highly compatible in a myriad of ways beyond D/s for the relationship to be successful.

Secondly, when you love your partner, D/s becomes like this private, special journey that enables you to explore yourself and each other in intimate, breathtaking, never-ending ways. Sex is more like an extension of that journey, a vehicle if you will, that allows you to excavate, ask, dare, receive, give and explore things about yourself, and slightly beyond yourself, that you never knew existed. The power and intensity and connection to one another almost feels cosmic. It’s like you’re attached to one another, like muscle on bone.

6. Do you have psychological issues?

Smile. No more than the average person.

In the real world I am a professional, a mom, capable, creative and self-reliant. But as a woman, D/s speaks to some deep and intimate part of my soul. I long to be mastered and taken and led by one amazing man I love. But not just any many can call himself a Dom and own me. There is a ferocious tiger that guards the gates to that sacred part of me. I encourage other women to do the same.

7. Is D/s all about whips, chains, blood and pain?

No. Please do not confuse D/s with S&M, which is sadomasochism. S&M is the dynamic where one person (the sadist) enjoys inflicting pain, often sexually, on someone who enjoys receiving it (the masochist). That being said, some people may incorporate some level of S&M into their D/s dynamic — but more often than not, it’s mild to moderate and takes the form of spanking, which, let’s be honest, many “vanilla” couples have tried in the throes of passion.

Please note that BDSM is divided into three areas: BD, bondage and discipline; DS, Dominance and submission; and SM, for sadomasochism. Not everyone combines all areas, nor do they do so in the same ways; it’s up to the couple to decide upon and consent to together. Also, many couples don’t even categorize themselves under these labels and simply call acts like blindfolding or handcuffing “kink.

8. Is D/s largely about kinky sex then?

D/s is first and foremost an energy dynamic that flows between two people. One person, the Dom, takes on more the role of leader, guide, enforcer, protector and/or daddy, while the other person, the sub, assumes more the role of pleaser, brat, tester, baby girl, and/or servant. Many couples limit the D/s dynamic to sexual role play in the bedroom. But D/s can be expanded and applied in exciting and creative ways beyond it.

For example, a Dom may create simple yet ‘unordinary’ rules for his sub to follow, such as requiring she ask his permission to masturbate when he’s absent. Or, the dynamic may involve much stricter rules and numerous tasks that entrust him with more control of her mind, body and behaviors. This is where the line between D/s crosses into that of Master/slave, which is much more in-depth and more of a lifestyle.

9. Does the Dom have all the power while the sub is pretty much a doormat?

No. This is one of the biggest myths about D/s. A true D/s relationship is based upon the needs, wants, desires and curiosities of the sub — she defines the flow and boundaries of the relationship. The Dom’s job is to listen closely to her, ask questions, intuit what she says and sometimes can’t, and help her creatively and safely explore her innermost self, mentally, emotionally and yes, sexually, too. Sometimes her boundaries get gently pressed, too.

This is why the four pillars of a D/s relationship are trust, communication, respect and honesty. And if one pillar is missing or one starts crumbling, the relationship becomes stunted and may even collapse.

By: Delaine Moore

[kagura4]

An analysis on Sasori’s relationship with puppetry

As we all know, Sasori had a very lonely childhood. When his parents died, his only surviving grandmother, Chiyo, neglected him to make poisons and weapons and doing stupid shit like sealing tailed beasts in babies for Suna, which took a toll on Sasori, who attempted to use his talent in puppetry as a coping mechanism. 

Now here’s the interesting part. It didn’t take long for Sasori to realize that the puppets that he made in his parents’ likeness weren’t actually alive, that they couldn’t replicate the human love that they sought. But why did he keep pursuing it, even if he knew that it wasn’t real?  We all saw the look of dead realization on Sasori’s face, so why would he even go so far as to proclaim inauthentic love as art?

My take on that is that puppetry was the only thing Sasori had. Sasori never had anybody else to comfort him, so even if puppetry reminded him of a painful memory, he sought to be the best at it, at the very least. His emotional death was a slow and painful process that reached its peak when he became Chuunin and he started contributing to Suna by making his own puppets. Isn’t it ironic that he somehow followed his grandmother’s footsteps - the very person that Sasori hated so much deep down - by burying his emotions under work? In Episode 319 (or as I like to call, The Komushi Episode™) the next scene after this was Sasori working on puppetry and poison. We are given a glimpse as to what type of life Sasori’s lived up to this point: he’s working away at his desk, and his allegedly only friend talking to him but barely getting an answer. The only time Sasori ever speaks in the Komushi episode was when the topic was on puppets: (1) when he introduced Karasu, Kuroari and Sanshuo to Komushi…

Komushi: I have a message from Chiyo-baasama. She wants the puppets she ordered sooner— Sasori: (points at his puppets) Karasu, Kuroari, Sanshuo. Komushi: (looks in that direction) Oh. Sasori: Everything she requested is done. Komushi: Oh, so these are your new creations… That was quick. Sasori: I don’t like to keep people waiting. Komushi: Heh. Yeah, that’s true.

...and (2) when he introduced puppet!Komushi to his grandmother.

Sasori: I don’t like to make people wait. I thought there’d be a little more progress. Chiyo: Sasori! What are you doing?! Sasori: You barely got [the poison he requested] to the standard size… (Puppet!Komushi walks eerily in the darkness.) Sasori, in a cold, emotionless voice: As requested, the model is finished.

Sasori doesn’t give us much lines to work with, so I’ll go ahead and interpret these lines as how I understood them. Like I mentioned, Sasori became emotionally detached because he traded people for puppets - puppets may not be real, but they last forever, and that’s Sasori’s stunted heart has an easier time handling. After all, he never got over his parents’ deaths, as much as he convinces himself in-canon that he no longer feels anything. Here’s a question for Sasori: if he was truly over his parents’ deaths, then how come he didn’t destroy their puppets? They were, at the time, useless after all. Chiyo only upgraded them later.

Sasori can’t deal with people because he’s too gripped by the painful reality that people can disappear at any time without a moment’s notice. But puppets are always there - all that Sasori needs to do is twitch his pinky. If they get broken, they won’t even cry or complain or scream. Sasori can repair and renovate a puppet to his heart’s content. A puppet will never change unless he wants to. Even if people don’t “leave” him, their personalites are bound to change for better or worse. Sasori doesn’t want to risk the uncertainity.

And that’s why Sasori proclaims eternal beauty as true art. His past also helps us understand why he’s so adamant in proving Deidara wrong about ephemeral beauty: everything that Sasori cared about was temporary. His parents’ presence was fleeting. So was Chiyo’s, his only family left, and so was Komushi’s, his only friend in the fucking world. Sasori has seen it all. That’s why he’s dead set on proving this ignorant little brat wrong, because Deidara doesn’t know what Sasori’s been through. Though of course, that’s just my take…

[monkey-network]

redPill Your Mind [Part 1]

This is gonna be one of the drunken things I’ll ever write, but there needed to be balance so I hope you enjoy.

So, you know what I expected when I saw the title Change Your Mind? A sequel to Sorry to Bother You, in which Rebecca Sugar and Noelle Stevenson’s [self inserts] head to a Penthouse house party hosted by Buzzfeed type millennial hetero CEOs and they eventually have to slaughter their way out of there before they’re injected with a serum that turns people into jungle cat human hybrids......... instead we got a special that one could say had too many cooks in the kitchen, only for all to season the roast with the same salt, water, & pepper. But hey, whence you read all of this, know that it was all very entertaining to me. Okay, so...

We return to Rapunzel’s tower where Steven is still locked away in his sequin suit where Blue comes in and has an argument with him who is actually Pink and it’s all a dream that apparently took place in the past but the question here is when? Like it supposedly takes place before Pink got Earth but after she started acting like less of a brat? So it’s like... she was a pretty entitled brat at one point but here she’s restrained and regretful of herself here now. What?

I’m honestly at a lost at how I should feel about Pink Diamond cuz on the one hand she basically lied, used, and manipulated others into false realities and subconsciously relied on a 14 year old to be their guiding key to relieving the weight they had on themselves because she wasn’t mature enough to face this herself. On the other hand, she is seen as somebody that’s in a strict, estranged relationship with her parental figures and comes across as the one gets the rod and yet is pretty spoiled. On one hand, she sent Steven some positives vibes before her death, so that’s great. But on the other hand with this dream scene, we, or at least I, don’t really see her getting abused by the diamonds as much as having to be disciplined and told to for goofing around? Like Blue Diamond agreed to letting Pink keep the rainbow worms, Pink took advantage of that and did something unruly, and she’s put in time-out because of it. Like yeah, that tower is pretty depressing even if you can escape from it with your shapeshift and floaty powers, but it’s not like she’s in there because the others think she’s always a waste of space but because she acted headstrong and is sent there to have some time to reflect on her repercussions. Blue doesn’t figuratively looks down on Pink, think of her as any less in that scene in particular, she just appears disappointed that Pink isn’t acting like an expectedly responsible leader. Like yeah, Pink’s treated like a child but the show made me believe that she was only a child back then.

Not to mention, her “parents” are dictators, explicit dictators that are trying to maintain a galaxy wide empire full of destroyed planets and massive use of structural militarization. They have to chastise Pink for not living up to their expectations because their expectations amounts to being sith lords that seek to kill, look grandiose, and control at will. They weren’t trying to get Pink into an Ivy League and get a million dollar business afloat, they were trying to build her into the next conqueror and I’m at a lost as whether I’m supposed to empathize with that. The show made little effort in helping me think of her as anything more than a based ass bitch among a group of the same stitch that sorta kept the cycle of control going when she finally stepped up to be a leader and yet the show wants me to think that her intentions overall meant something sincere but fuck, man. Intentions work when the outcome is most probable and soluble on all accounts, it doesn’t help with three mentally stunted alien women that apparently haven’t integrated too well into society despite the fact that there are entire libraries to learn from and grasp the ups and downs that humanity have gone through since one of the purposes of staying on Earth is to protect the life on Earth as well as coexist with the inhabitants otherwise a World War 0 would’ve been imminent from the get go. Honestly, WW0 would’ve probably been cool too. I guess that’s why Russia is nonexistent cuz the fight between Russians and Gems would’ve been too epic to be detailed.

Also, we see the Diamonds do the truth bomb again and it’s like were they trying to kill or corrupt the gems cuz it seems that they weren’t aware of how their powers work and it’s like what the fuck. You just throw up your hand and expect the worst? They didn’t test this power far beforehand before decidedly saying “You know what? Let’s try these hand beams. I’m sure they’ll be super effective in wiping them out.” On top of that, the Diamonds didn’t bother to see what happened afterward? They just nuked the planet and left not caring if there were any survivors to squash out? Like yeah, if I set off a nuke then I’m certain many would die but if I wanted to make sure everyone dead, I’d cover my tracks and send some drones down to comb the area to make sure of no survivors and if the corrupted gem count were overwhelming then yeah I’d step in and take care of it again. Just saying, I would be a far more tactile villain but apparently there are no villains in this show so I guess not doing this is consistency? Wonderful.

We cut to the present where a Deja Blue, that isn’t ass tasting water, happens and Blue is like “Dang it, I try to be the better, more lenient dictator mom and you just soiling the good order and my patience. I’m putting my foot down this time.” And they mention dehydration and starvation but it’s like how would Blue know what those are? This small moment comes off as Blue being quite a brick wall but that’s the fact she doesn’t know what human customs are because.... she was never informed or obligated to care of such things. 

In any case, Steven tells Blue that this dynamic of theirs ain’t gucci, and Blue breaks down coming to terms with her estranged behavior with Pink. And I gotta look a little further into this. So the scene amounts to Blue realizing that Earth suited Pink or Steven better than the likes of Homeworld and yet it didn’t feel earned in the sense that Blue truly saw what Steven saw in Earth.  

Remember the episode When It Rains where Peridot felt more comfortable with Earth after experiencing raindrops for the first time? That could’ve been for the Diamonds, somewhat. Legs from Here to Homeworld rushed and brushed off what could’ve been a chance for Blue and Yellow to at least grasp the perspective Pink had all those years ago before they came to a full realization in this episode. They didn’t have to be as blown away as Peridot was, but they should’ve had some time before to somewhat get a sense of conflict in their own ideals and how Pink was probably in the right of her actions before falling in line to Steven’s gospel.

Like we can point the finger at Blue for being an emotionally controlling parent but like I said, she is a dictator, one whom, based on what we got, didn’t figuratively looked down on Pink as much as wanted better from her, and punished her accordingly when she went against the order that the Diamonds built for themselves. She was negligible to Pink’s real desires, but then again she had to run an empire and had to make sure Pink would follow suit so it’s like what Pink wanted was irrelevant to what was expected of her. The chamber’s a bit much, and I ain’t excusing it, but it’s like they could’ve done far worse to make Pink see things their way. And we never really see Blue enforce any control over Pink, be emotionally dysfunctional towards her, or diminish her sense of self as much as give her a stern talking about what she must uphold as a Diamond, what she born to be, as any sense to diverge from that should be absolved, while being consistent in her soft-spoken yet straightforward tone. I’ve seen a few say that she alludes to abusive parenting but the show never indicates that her disappointment and frustration enabled a subtly abusive side of her. Only one moment presents such a case where she uses her power blue balls on Steven and he takes this as a regular occurrence, but this only happens when Steven pushes her to do so out of frustration not long after trying to reason with him. For the sake of Pink Diamond, Blue really just agrees with Steven instead of understanding this for herself. Yeah, this is meant to feel like a one sided argument, but it didn’t feel like Steven had to think that much to get her on his side. While it makes sense that she would be the first who comes to terms with her past transgressions, those transgressions aren’t exhibited well to say that she was truly in the wrong for everything she did to Pink, based on what we’ve seen and heard of her. I ain’t trying to defend the Diamonds, but Blue’s revelation feels more by design of the plot and less out of earnest rationale that’s emotional resonating.

And trying to say the Crystal Gems are better parents than Blue and Yellow is a big ass understatement because their expectations weren’t as necessarily impactful as being a responsible ruler of a fucking galactic empire. Those are two different planes of settlement and standards, and Steven trying to say what is normal or not rings hallow when he didn’t make any case back on Earth for what is considerably normal there. Not to mention, Pink and Steven, despite how it may seem, are two different characters. The show tries to provide that Steven is his own person yet has to work out the complicated relationship of somebody he’s never seen and still knows minute about with her emotionally stunted parents, or his other family, by making believe that they’re almost one in the same based on pattern recognition? Say what? I mean we’ll get to this later... but let’s say Pink is quite the catalyst in this special and the uphill battle is only the slight incline from here.

So after Blue joins the party temporarily, she hides Steven and Connie in her boobs, they head to Pink’s quarters, the two eat, get clothed, and head out to get the gems back. And this is where I stop for now cuz I’m tired.

Continued in Part 2 (eventually...)

[camsthisky]

Determined Ghosts

Part 1 | Part 2

ao3 | ff.net

Summary: A gala, supposed to be spent by eating cakes and wearing a pretty dress, goes wrong. But honestly? What doesn't in Steph's life? Still, they better figure this out before it's more than just Dick that's hurt.

Stephanie’s eating one of those tiny little cakes that absolutely is not enough in any way whatsoever when Tim walks into her line of sight, head craning this way and that over the crowd of people Bruce has invited into his home for yet another gala-party-thingamajig. And—dear god, the boy is short. He’s on his tip toes.

“Timmy, dearest,” Steph says, only a little bit mockingly, and Tim’s gaze snaps to hers, eyes wide and owlish, like he hadn’t even seen her standing next to the dessert table. Which. That’s not that worrying, considering that Tim works on like, less than two hours of sleep a night.

Maybe Steph can get Cass to arm wrestle Tim into going to sleep instead of patrol tonight. And she can casually suggest a movie night to Dick. Dick will jump on anything that involves family bonding time, and Tim’ll be out cold in no time.

“Steph?” he asks, and now he’s giving her a weird look, like he hadn’t even known she was here at the gala-party-thingamajig. Again, very possible. For a person who’s supposed to be one of the best detectives, Tim can miss the most obvious things. He blinks a couple times, seems to accept that she’s not some sleep deprived hallucination, and walks over to her. “Did you need something?”

“No,” Steph says, shoving the rest of the tiny—tiny. Steph is going to have words with Alfred later—cake into her mouth. She swallows and raises an eyebrow. “Did you need something?”

Tim shrugs, head swiveling to look out over the crowd again. “I’m looking for Dick.”

“He was over by Damian earlier,” Steph says. “I think the brat brought his sword, and Bruce refused to deal with it. By default, it was Dick’s problem.”

“No, I know that,” Tim says distractedly. “I was standing right there when Damian started swearing at Dick. It was hilarious.”

“Yeah, you sound like it really changed your world,” Steph snorts.

Tim wrinkles his nose. “That was almost an hour ago, Steph.”

“Mhmm,” Steph says, debating whether it’d be a good idea to stuff the brand new purse that Bruce had gotten her the other day with the entire plate of mini-cakes and how much she’d get yelled at if she was caught. “And?”

“I saw him after that, though,” Tim tells her, following her gaze. He rolls her eyes when he catches on to what she’s planning on doing. “You know you can literally have Alfred make you bigger portions later, right?”

“It’s the principle of the thing, Timmy,” Steph says sweetly.

“It is not.”

“Is, too,” and then Steph finally makes her decision and starts grabbing a few of everything. Because if she’s going to stuff her purse, then she’s going to go all the way. Maybe Cass would be willing to share with her later. If not Cass, then definitely Dick. Speaking of, “Why are you looking for Dick, anyways?”

Tim blows out a heavy breath and sort of deflates, and it has enough umph to it that Steph stops raiding the dessert table to stare at him.

“Um,” she says.

Tim runs a hand down his face. “Sorry. It’s just—He went to go grab something from his room. Said it was important and just left.”

“And?” Steph prompts. “What’s so bad about that?”

“It’s been almost a half hour since I’ve seen him, Steph. And I’ve been around the room twice,” Tim tells her, and he leans back against a nearby pillar. He looks exhausted—well. More exhausted than usual, and Steph has half a mind to find Dick herself and tell him to tell Tim to stop worrying. And when he talks again, his voice is small. “I’ve got a bad feeling about this.”

Of course, it just so happens that that’s when the lights go out.

Steph drops her dessert-filled purse and grabs Tim’s hand, pulling him close. People start murmuring and muttering, and Steph has a feeling that Bruce’s gala-party-thingamajig has gone south real fast.

“Should we grab our uniforms?” she wonders, her voice soft enough that she’s sure only Tim hears her.

“No,” Tim says. “We don’t know if this is an attack or—”

The lights flicker. On, off. Someone screams bloody murder, and people start running for the exit as quick as they can. Someone shoulder checks Steph and she stumbles, but Tim tightens his hold on her hand and pulls her upright.

She whirls on him a second later, raising an eyebrow and shouting in order to be heard over the cacophony of panic, “You were saying?!”

“We still don’t—” He stumbles forward as someone bumps into him, too, but he stays on his feet. Pity. It’d have been funny to see him faceplant. Probably not the best time, though. He pulls her closer. “We still don’t know what’s going on!”

“Bruce?”

Tim nods. “Bruce.”

Somehow—holy shit, somehow—they make it through the throng of panicked people crowding the exits to the back of the room and over to where they can see Bruce standing with Damian, Cass, and the Commissioner. By the time they make it to them, most everyone is gone, and the lights are back to normal.

Dick’s nowhere to be found, though, and Tim and Steph share a look.

Bruce is staring at them. Steph knows that there’s no way he didn’t catch that, but he doesn’t comment on it. Yet, at least. Maybe it’s because the Commissioner is still standing there, or maybe it’s because they’ve got bigger things to worry about.

“Are you two alright?” he asks instead.

Tim nods and finally lets go of Steph’s hand, and she shakes it out, flexing it a few times, too. She hadn’t realized how hard Tim had been gripping it until he’d stopped, and she shoots him a concerned look he only grimaces at.

When she realizes that Bruce is still looking at her, waiting for her answer, she makes a face. “I’m fine, you big worrywart. Tim saved me from landing on my face, and I was disappointed by not seeing Tim land on his.”

“Hey!”

“I regret that it did not happen, as well,” Damian says, and he sounds seriously sad about it. Sheesh. Steph had forgotten that the brat had it out for Tim.

“Come at me and you’ll regret it,” Tim says, not a hint of teasing in his voice.

“Like you could take me down,” Damian scoffs.

Tim tenses, but backs off when Bruce clears his throat purposely, his eyes flashing dangerously. It’s so unsubtle and—God, after years, Steph still can’t believe Bruce Wayne can act like he does in public when all he seems to be is a big pile of brood and dad. She can see where Tim gets it from, at least. The brooding and acting part, not the dad part.

Next to Bruce, Jim Gordon sighs. “I’m going to see if I can round up a few of my men, Bruce,” he says. His rake over all of them, before they meet Bruce’s again. “I’ll be back soon, but it’s better that all of you stay together. Just in case.”

Bruce smiles, and Steph wonders if it’s painful for him. It certainly looks painful. “Thank you, Jim.”

And with that, the Commissioner’s gone, Bruce drops the smile, and it’s just the five of them standing there. Nobody says anything for a few seconds, and so Steph steps up. It’s like, her thing by now. She could probably major in it if she wanted to. She’s surrounded by so many emotionally stunted idiots that she’s got enough practical experience, after all.

Except Cass. Cass is great.

“So?” Steph says, folding her arms over her chest and raises her eyebrows. “Whatever’s happening, it better be good. I lost my dessert purse for this.”

Cass giggles, and Bruce pinches the bridge of his nose. Tim doesn’t react much, but Damian scowls at her in confusion. It’s great. So many different reactions in so few words. She should get an award.

“I don’t want to know,” Bruce tells her. “Did anyone see anything?”

“Dick disappeared,” Tim says.

Steph elbows Tim. “You don’t know that. All you said was that Dick left to get something from his room. And technically that’s not seeing anything.”

“It’s the lack of seeing something,” Tim argues.

“Grayson is probably playing a prank,” Damian says, a somewhat adorable scowl on his face and—good god, does this child not know how to smile? Did he inherit Bruce’s gene of feeling pain while smiling? Someone needs to teach Damian how to have fun, and soon.

Cass frowns. “I don’t think so.”

Well, Cass’s word is law, after all. At least, it is to Steph. It’s a rare occasion that Cass has been wrong—though, it has happened before, Steph’s sure. She just can’t remember—and Steph doesn’t think now is one of those times.

Damian’s scowl inches closer and closer to a worried frown. “Then where is he?”

“Kidnapped?” Tim suggests weakly.

Steph grimaces. Dick’s a slippery one, especially when it comes to kidnapping. He’s got acrobatic skills he can use in self-defense, curtesy of his circus roots, and it’s an advantage that none of the other kids really have.

Something shatters upstairs, and the five of them freeze. And then, before Steph realizes it, Tim’s darting for the stairs, the rest of them just a beat behind him. They stop at the top of the stairs, and Steph gapes at what she sees.

“I think that I’m going to be sick,” she says, staring in horror at the giant puddle of blood soaking into the carpet. “Like, someone find me a toilet to throw up in, kind of sick.”

“You’re not,” Cass tells her, and Steph sighs.

“I’m not,” she agrees, but she can’t take her eyes off of the puddle. “But that is still disturbing. I sleep here, Tim.”

“Yeah, but you don’t live here,” Tim says, and Steph manages to take her eyes away from the scene in front of her to glance at him. He looks pale, and he’s got that look in his eyes, where his thoughts are racing a mile minute. It’s a little disconcerting, actually.

“I sleep here enough that I basically live here,” Steph says.

“Enough,” Bruce says, his eyes hard and unforgiving. “Cassandra, go get Jim. As of right now, this is a crime scene until we rule out otherwise.”

Cass nods, and she’s just about to leave when Steph hears a voice from down the hall. She frowns because—that was from Dick’s room.

“You guys heard that, right?” Steph asks. “Because if you didn’t, I’m out. Outtie 5000. Good-freaking-bye. Stephanie Brown has left the building and isn’t coming back. All that jazz.”

“I heard it,” Bruce says. And Steph can only watch as he makes his way down the hall towards his son’s room, Damian and Tim not even hesitating—or arguing—before following after him.

Steph shares an uneasy glance with Cass and she bites her lip. “What do you think?”

Cass doesn’t speak for a moment, but then she nods her head in the direction the boys had gone, and Steph can’t help but deflate in disappointment. Just a little. This is a little different than being in uniform, and she’s not happy that she’s doing this in a short sparkly dress Cass had picked out for her.

Cass looks at ease, though, and Steph appreciates it when her best friend holds her hand and squeezes. Steph smiles back.

“Guess we should go watch their backs, huh?”

“That’s what we’re here for,” Cass replies, and Steph’s smile grows a bit more genuine.

“Right, right,” Steph breathes. And then they skirt around the puddle. “Well. Might as well get on with it, right? I can totally use my heels as a weapon, right? That’s somewhat socially acceptable? Actually, don’t answer that. If it comes down to it, I’m doing it anyways. Watch out, thugs, I’m armed and dangerous with heeled shoes, and I can attest that getting hit in the face with one really freaking hurts. So watch out for—”

Steph stutters to a stop, both physically and mentally. She’s standing in the doorway to Dick’s bedroom, but—but.

“What happened?” she whispers to Tim, who looks about as clued in as she does.

His wide eyes flick to her helplessly before they’re back on Bruce, who’s checking Dick’s pulse. Dick, as it turns out, has been passed out on the floor of his bedroom, blood oozing sluggishly from a cut on his forehead. Bruce is trying to gently rouse him, but besides the steady up-down motions of his chest as he breathes, Dick doesn’t move.

He’s dead to the world.

Steph shivers at the mental image that brings up.

Damian scoffs softly, and Steph glances over at him, watches as he watches Dick with worried, but angry eyes.

From somewhere else in the manor, there’s another crash, and the lights flicker again.

Bruce finally looks up, meeting each of their eyes in turn, and says, “There’s someone in the house.”

And yeah. Steph’s done.

[silvallyfuuuk]

hi this is random but i was drawing tigerstar earlier today because design reasons and i was bored but @silverhawk reminded me of how tigerstar is basically the warriors equivalent of a cis dude and how they're brought up..

man this dude is SUCH missed potential, they could have done so much more with him.

for starters, make the entire "firestar replaced me in the eyes of bluestar" legitimately realistic. since when did tigerstar care about bluestar? it would be far better to give tigerpaw as an apprentice to bluefur, because then it would mean he actually cared about her attention outside of power.

pinestar is a useful way to make him more interesting too. he was MEANT for leadership, literally, most of tigerstar's male bloodline are leaders. while pinestar was still around, he was groomed into thinking that. he was allowed to be the clans spoiled brat. leopardfoot babies him, and won't correct him. pinestar has lofty expectations, but doesn't give any love. he keeps talking about how he will be leader, and he must be strong, but pinestar isn't a good father, and is quite distant, before coming a kittypet and abandoning the clan. not only does tigerkit struggle with the sudden change in how he is treated, being the son of a traitor, he is left with the lofty expectations pinestar and his kin left him. to be strong, and a leader. nothing less than perfect. this makes a perfectionist, who seeks to get whatever he needs no matter what. he's immature, and still a kid, but the reality of what he should be, and what he thinks he deserves to be just because of his linage, gets in deep. there's no one to guide him, because leopardfoot's love is unfortunately just smothering him in love and refusing to let him grow up (he's her last kit, and it's hard to let go of your only son who almost died early on after all), so he doesn't learn from her, nor does he learn from other clan cats who should be supporting him. they cast looks of scorn, and call him names. and leopardfoot just keeps reiterating pinestar's words to be the next clan leader. he's socialized to assert himself and fight. he can't be soft, because in order to be a leader that his mother and father expects him to be he must be strong, and that means he cannot show weakness or emotion. kind of like male socialization, yeah.

it would also be another matter that would make bluefur's struggle to be the new thunderclan deputy more interesting, because she just got tasked with dealing with the traitor's son. a much better conflict than sunstar being sexist and like oh you had babies :) no leadership for you. id go on and say maybe tigerpaw being her apprentice would be her "prove yourself"thing because she took a riverclan mate, and sunstar isn't sure anymore. no one else in thunderclan is suitable, so ofc sunstar is angry. he then forces her to train a cat everyone only sees pinestar in, and is a much less sexist punishment than oh you're a girl. if sunstar really cared about bluestar like his own daughter he'd let her be deputy while she took care of her kits. but it's more realistic for him to be disappointed and reluctant to make her deputy because he knew she broke the code.

bluesfur is super fixated on becoming deputy. to show she's loyal to thunderclan in the eyes of sunfall, she 'disposes' her kits (he very much pushed her, not because she had kits but because of who their father was), and returns to take tigerkit as her apprentice. because bluefur is tigerpaw's first proper mentor figure that isn't his mom, he looks up to her a lot. he learns ambition from bluefur, and how you have to give everything up for it if you want it. he cares a lot about his mentor, she's a smart, strong cat, and she's the next clan leader. because tigerpaw isn't liked much by the clan at first because of his father, he imprints on the one cat who seems to be fair to him. (of course bluefur has many reservations about him but sees making him into a noble warrior as a stepping stone for leadership)

bluefur is young, reckless, and ambitious. tigerpaw picks this up, and because of how the pressure of his past linage to be amazing (very much like male socialization!) he follows her path

unlike bluefur he did not have any stable moral footing early on. he came out of the womb sick and no one believing in him. his mother spoiled him, and deflected any criticism possible.

when bluefur speaks about being deputy, and how she will do anything for it, tigerpaw agrees she deserves to be deputy, and then leader. the less than mature bluefur, who has the all the potential, but lacks the experience that comes with age, says that if she was leader, he would be a fine deputy. this is something bluefur said hastily and didn't think much of, but on a little kid's mind, it does a lot to tigerpaw. not only does he find himself loyal to bluefur, he also sees her leadership as a way to achieve his dream.

tigerpaw's ambitions vs realism and patience turns out to be bloody and all consuming.

when redtail is made deputy, he's hurt, but he knows he has not had an apprentice yet, so he does not get to be a deputy. however after training darkstripe, he expects to. but redtail is young like him, and though he waits, he is not deputy. by the time he gets ravenpaw as an apprentice, he's planned out redtail's death. to him it's justified, this is what you're supposed to do to get what you want, right?

after all, tigerpaw learns from bluefur, and the other not so great influences that to become great, you must do it yourself, as no one will believe you otherwise. everyone underestimated him, so the only way to assert himself is force, and for everyone to see it.

bluefur teaches him loyalty, kindness, and courage. but she also teaches him bad behaviours that she herself admits was not justified back when she was training him. unfortunately bluefur is unaware of the impact she made on a young, fragile developing mind.

thistleclaw in theory is only reckless and hot-blooded (in bluestar's prophecy that is), but bluefur seeks to be deputy over him anyways, all for self interest. tigerpaw picks this up. but while bluefur mellows out, and concedes it was not the best idea, tigerpaw clings to these ideals because he has nothing else.

maybe as an apprentice he has honest to god angst, but by the time he's a warrior, his ego is so inflated despite the fact he also has an inferiority complex (thanks to pinestar, and cats judging him) he's beyond rationality. he wouldn't cry in a sense, but he'd express his Sadness in anger and violence, because that's the only thing that's acceptable of a strong warrior.

he's emotionally stunted, and unlike bluestar and firestar, he never was shown that kindness and love are the right answers. while blue+fire were raised fine, tiger was not. he didn't have proper support, and bluefur was mentally shakey during her warrior years, which just fed to tigerpaw's problem.

by the time he's killed redtail, and bluestar passes him over in favour of lionheart, he loses the idealization he once had of her, and sees her as a stepping stone to leadership.

tigerstar was a noble warrior in life who was an extremist, but after exile, and many things after, he was beyond redemption. in life he had honour, courage, and righteousness. no matter what happened, those were his main traits. but in death/the dark forest, he devolved into the superiority inferiority complex he has now, where he seeks to only prove himself as strong, use violence to solve his frustrations he had in lifez and take revenge on firestar, who he thinks stole everything from him, as a kittypet like his father, and the one he saw turned bluestar weak, and made her favour firestar over him.

idk food for thought, just.. much more interesting to have tigerstar be the standard cis male socialization dude who honestly could have been helped, but went too far, and used violence to solve his problems.

he's smart, brave, and righteous, but emotionally, he was horribly stunted, and could never think maturely in that fashion thanks to what he learned, and what he was surrounded by in youth.

so. much. missed. potential.