#//They WILL sabotage the other suitors and make the other other look better; subtly (or not) wingmanning for them

[dutybcrne]

One of the biggest indicators of how close Kaeya and Diluc were growing up is not only their matching jealousy streaks, but also in the way they will get territorial on each other’s behalves.

[darkh3llscap3]

Could I request headcanons of Jeff Pfister , pre cult Kai , Rory Monahan and Jimmy Darling(Yandere versions) with a famous obsession who sometimes talks about how cute they are in interviews?(cause the reader and the boys are best friends so they know eachother)

A/n: I know this took a while to finish but I've been busy with school lately. I really hope you like this.

Warnings: possessive behavior, slight swearing, mention of kidnapping, drugs (weed) mentioned.

General Masterlist

AHS Masterlist

Jimmy Darling:

He would be astonished by it might even replay the videos trying to see if he heard the television correctly.

Maybe this means you feel like you should be more than friends.

Then he would doubt himself thinking that you could never like him in that way.

He seems like he would try to bring it up in a conversation “Do you remember that interview you did where you called me cute?”

He would subtly flirt with you to try and get more information to see if you do like him.

Would be very smug that you think that way about him he would be telling people about it.

In the end, he would think of it as an opportunity and would make any possible suitors back away as he makes you his, cause you will be his.

Also, would flirt back to you or compliment you in an interview too, or just in general.

At first, he couldn’t believe his ears did you just call him cute? He replayed the videos over again trying to get a better listen and he heard it again. Questions kept blaring in his mind one after another. Does this mean that they like me back? Are they waiting for me to make the next move? What does this change between us? 

He tried to stop the overthinking but he couldn’t thoughts of you kept playing in his mind and he started thinking about all the shoulder touches, the little pecks on the cheek, and the late nights spent talking to each other. He wanted no need you, now that you dropped a vital hint you bet your ass he was gonna pursue it.

Rory Monahan:

He would immediately be smug about it and a sense of pride would fill his entire being.

Would bring it up out of the blue and say “I think you pretty cute too.” would purposefully try to make you blush.

Since he’s already obsessed with you that video would be saved somewhere on his phone.

He probably was watching it to get more information about you and saw you sitting there looking magnificent and calling him cute was a huge cherry on top.

Take this as an opportunity to drop bigger hints like ship-sized hints.

He knew you felt somewhere around the same about him but he was gonna make sure you felt the same way about him that he feels about you. He plans to drop more hints about his feelings since your already halfway there. It’s good cause he’s been wanting you but doesn’t want to strain the relationship he already has with you.

Kai Anderson:

Would probably think it’s about time cause he had already said something about how cute you were in an interview 

Would want to talk to you solely cause he wanted to talk about the comment you made about him.

Would confess his obvious feelings now this is where things get scary, this can either go one of two ways.

Either you feel the same way and you'll get together to satisfy his desires

Or you feel ore has a friend towards him and he kidnaps you and/or sabotages your life so you turn to him and eventually get together.

Either way, you're going to end up with him so why not make it easier for him all he wants is to love and protect you.

He heard you ‘confess your love for him for the 20th time tonight he just couldn’t help but love the way your lips said he was cute. It was about time you dropped ore feelings about him. That night all he could think of were those words so he invited you over to talk about it more. He just hoped it would go the way he wanted cause if not then your life was going to be much more difficult.

Jeff Pfister:

I think he would be one of the first people to see the videos cause you had mentioned an interview and he was waiting for it to come out.

I'm not kidding when I say he did a double-take.

He would think he must be so high that he imagined hearing you say that.

Would probbly blush and keep thinking about it non-stop

Somehow be able to make it go viral by sharing it on a bunch of sites on .

He will never shut up about it and will definitely talk to you about it.

He sat there waiting patiently for your new interview video. He clicked refresh for the 78th time that day. There it popped up a picture of you in an outfit that complemented you do well. He starts the video and heard his name followed by your words. The joint from his mouth crashes to the ground as he hurries to replay and put the subtitles on. "Yeah, I would say Jeffs's cute." You say with a little bit of blush rising on your cheeks. He rushes to the phone to make a call to you already planning your future.

Taglist:

@1800-fuckbitchesgetmoney

[pettyprocrastination]

GAngel!Oberyn at first trying to help you get laid, but the he begins to realize that he HATES the idea of you with anyone else so he he subtly ruins dates, crap weather, date’s phone won’t stop ringing, annoying things like that. And after like a 3 weeks of you not going out he “runs into you” and ask you out. Bonus points if he’s in that robe. (Is this basic? Yes. But I’m a basic bitch)

Oberyn as an angel is the worst and best because he’s about to make divine intervention his personal bitch. Angels are set to follow specific rules. 1. not to directly interact with their ward, nor affect anybody in their life directly. 

Angels are supposed to guard and guide, not control or coddle. 

Maybe it’s because he thinks you're pretty. Maybe it’s because you always seem to look up at the sky with a pleased hum as you enjoyed the sun, almost as if thanking him for it. It was the same noise you made when snuggling under your covers on a rainy day, which he learned you loved just as much. 

Perhaps, it’s because you weren’t even his original ward. But his sister’s. Elia. Such a kind and caring soul who gave her life keeping you safe from foul forces that sought you out for whatever reason and wished you harm. 

Maybe it was a combination of it all, but Oberyn was hellbent on helping you in every way. Including dates. 

Until he learned he hated all of them.

He simply thought you deserved better, was his opinion. 

This one spoke too loud. 

That one could barely be heard. 

This one is too concerned with his looks instead of admiring yours. 

That one hardly looked you in the eye the entire time. 

This one is too rude. 

Too sharp. 

Too pale. 

Too prickly. 

Too human. 

You deserved better. and if he thought they weren’t worthy of you, well, why shouldn’t he do something about it?  Faulty cellphone connections, food poisoning, traffic jams and renovation mishaps were all too easy to create. 

But his favorite? Storms. 

Oh he loved storm. Swirling the clouds and watching the lighting dancing beneath him gave him a jolt of adrenaline like nothing else. 

Now of course he’d never create one so bad it’d harm others. But just enough that outside dining seemed like a poor choice. 

You never seemed to mind much. Part of the reason he liked making storms for you was because he knew you loved them. The first time since becoming your ward when it stormed, he watched you wrap a blanket around yourself before sitting by a window and watching the rain and wind whip through the air with a smile. The booming thunder was a comforting bass in your chest that eventually lulled you to sleep. 

If he could keep these undeserving men away from you while bringing you such joy, why stop? 

Your most recent date he had yet to sabotage because well, you were just so excited. Maybe he would allow this one. Put the suitor through the ringer before allowing him to go further. 

He watched as you arrived at a restaurant in your favorite outfit and was led to a table with shaking fingers. He saw the way your eyes would dart to the door every time it opened and then flash to your phone with a frown. 

When the waitress came over to take your order, you politely told her you’d like to wait until your date showed up. 

So you waited. 

and waited. 

and waited. 

it was an hour later when you no longer held that joy in your eyes, but instead embarrassment as you watched the waitress walk by once again with pity in her eyes.  Oberyn’s brows furrowed. The son of a bitch wasn’t even going to show? After all the effort you put in? After how excited you got? No. He wouldn’t let your night be ruined so quickly. 

The angel went from watching through the clouds to moving his way through the groups of people walking on the asphalt by the restaurant before you could blink. Just as he gripped the handle of the entrance and swung it open, a woman in a form fitting dress sat down in the seat across from you.  “Red or white?” She asked. You froze, blinking owlishly as you took her in. 

Ebony curls framed her face and fell over her shoulder. A soft yellow dress hugged her figure well, leaving a slit up the side to reveal her long legs and a dangerous neckline that left little to the imagination. She looked like the type of woman who you weren’t sure you wanted to be or be with. 

She was gorgeous. 

“Sir?” A woman in slacks and a black button down approached him, her nametag said Amy but he didn’t bother glancing at her as his eyes never left your table. “Are you here alone or with a party?” “Red.” You told her, she smiled.  “You have good taste.” She leaned over to the woman taking your order of drinks. You made a nervous noise in your throat before shooting your eyes up to the ceiling as she unknowingly gave you a perfect view down her dress. 

Oberyn clenched his teeth as the smile curling on the beautiful woman’s face. 

Oh she knew. 

“He’s an idiot, you know.” She told you. “Whoever it was that stood you up.”

Oberyn watched the mystery woman, enticing like a siren as she looked you over like a meal she wanted to devour right on the table before you. 

“Beauty like yours shouldn’t be abandoned.” She told you, she sat back in her chair, as if to take you in like a work of art. “It should be worshipped.” She was beautiful, charming, and something about her touched Oberyn in a way that had the alarms in his head ringing. 

“Ellaria Sand.” 

You stuttered out your name and she took your hand in hers before raising it to your lips. The soft mark left on your hand from her lipstick sent your heart beating so loud you wondered if she could hear it. 

Unbeknownst to you, she could. 

Ellaria made you laugh. She made you smile and feel beautiful and wanted and sexy. She made your knees week and your head dizzy in the best way possible. Oberyn watched the woman speak sweet words and spin stories to you all night. 

It wasn’t until the end of your date when she pressed her lips to yours with a low hum that made your knees weak and said goodbye in a soft voice with a promise of calling you in the morning. Her eyes flicked over your shoulder, catching Oberyn’s. 

And winking. 

For a moment they seemed feral, wild and ultimately not human. 

Oberyn blinked. 

His job just got a lot harder. 

[magaprima]

Part 2 Episode 4 Thoughts

Now, even though MG is only in it at the very end, obviously the tarot reader Mrs McG is Lilith with a glamour, so this is actually a Lilith heavy episode. Also, as a side note, the actress playing Mrs McG is so good in that when you watch it with the knowledge she’s Lilith, you see how much of her expressions and mannerisms are the same, and I just find that really impressive. The way she smiles, the wide eyes when she’s listening, the pressed lips before she prepares saying something...I just feel like the actor studied MG’s acting on set in order to do this performance. 

The first cards she reads are Sabrina’s, and she’s all ‘ah, you have questions about your young suitor’ and then when Sabrina admits, yes, she does, because he recently lied to her about not doing something, Lilith literally cannot keep her shit together over the smallness of that. She’s literally says:

“One lie? That’s it?”

You can literally see she’s just like ‘wtf, that’s your only problem? One lie? I’ve been dating the fucking Prince of Lies for thousands of years’. I love that, even while under a glamour, Lilith can’t hide her ‘wtf’ from people. 

“The cards tell me he’s a handsome trickster which few women can resist”

I feel this is another instance of Lilith speaking from experience, ever so subtly. Like we know Lucifer is, at his best, a handsome trickster, and Lilith wasn’t able to resist him. 

Then after Sabrina has her reading where she ends up dead thanks to the Weird Sisters, Lilith tells her the lesson is: 

“In this case, it’s not the boy you need to fear. Believe your trickster and him alone...you need not fear the dark path as long as you trust the boy who walks it with you”

Now, Lilith potentially knows that Nick is being used by the Dark Lord, and the reason she’s telling Sabrina to trust him is so she’ll trust the path the Dark Lord is setting her on. But considering Lilith, when she first hears his name, says to Sabrina he sounds like trouble, thus technically risking putting her off him, and even potentially accuses him of summon the demons, which would definitely keep Sabrina from trusting him, I’m going to say at this point Lilith doesn’t know, because the Dark Lord doesn’t exactly share all his plans with her, does he?

So what purpose does she have in telling Sabrina to trust him? Keeping her on the path, yes, but it’s also telling her that others are to be wary, that she should be on her guard and trust no one else. That even freaking includes ‘Ms Wardwell’. I just feel that Lilith, throughout all of these readings, claims to be messing with their heads, but actually seems to be giving them genuine advice via the cards. And I have headcanoned she sees her younger self Sabrina, the way she was in the Garden, and maybe subconsciously, she does want to push Sabrina in the direction that brings the freedom Lilith hasn’t yet had? Even if she doesn’t consciously realise it? I’m mainly thinking aloud here

And then she sees Theo and says ‘what a curious young man’. Instantly calls him ‘young man’ and I just love that. Lilith respects gender and pronouns. She tells him;

‘You look like a boy with a burning question. One that my tarot cards can asnwer better than any book’

And then she proceeds to give Theo a lesson that is all about not conforming, finding your own path, not looking for the quick and easy path, that cheating the journey brings bad things, and that the journey takes time, and also that what he looks like on the outside doesn’t change who he is on the inside, that Theo can make who he is, holds all the power. And that is such a freaking powerful message. And proves, to me at least, that Theo is entirely Lilith’s fave. 

She even tells him at the end that the message is ‘a warning’

“My advice? Don’t steal. And seek help early from others that can help you reach the prize you covet”

I mean she’s literally telling Theo the path to being what and who he wants to be lies in others, the support of those around him. To not keep it all to himself. 

Conversely, she seems to have no patience with Roz at all. She literally forces herself on her, sits down beside her, gets the card out, and holds no freaking punches with talking about the Cunning and guilt. I suspect this is because Roz is a pastor’s daughter, and her ancestors injured witches. She is so consistently short and abrupt with her, even when Roz is horrified by the reading, simply saying ‘You still have a choice to make’. And the reading itself makes Roz question her Father and the church, as it shows them as corrupt and bad. Now, Lilith could be bending the truth extremely, and we know the readings aren’t literal, she even says herself that the cards are just a mirror, but there has to be enough truth in it for Roz to refuse the surgery. And Roz doesn’t question in the vision when she’s saying how her Dad always gets money from the church. Now, it’s a fact that there is a hell of a lot of monetary corruption in all organised religion, and the Christian churches are certainly not exempt from that....so what does Lilith know about Roz’s father? Either way, it’s very obvious Lilith is not a fan of Roz’s family and their church connections. Obviously. 

She then tempts Zelda in by simply showing her the High Priestess card, which makes me laugh. It’s just like that’s all it took to make Zelda sit down. And her lesson for her is a really simple; don’t tell Blackwood a fucking thing. Straight and to the point. 

She’s a lot gentler with Harvey than she is with Roz, despite him being a Witch Hunter, and ends up letting him see what might happen if he left Greendale, but through the lesson reveals to him that he’s too tied to the realm of witches and demons, that no matter where he travels, it will follow him. BUT, she also gives him a purpose, she shows him what his drawings can do, that his artistic talent can be used to to fight things, and I don’t think it’s a coincidence that Harvey then uses his drawing talents to keep the gates of hell shut. Lilith obviously didn’t know that was what would happen, but it definitely opens the idea up for him that his art can work like sigils, his own kind of magic. It seems to be that reading for Harvey has Lilith showing him a purpose in this world that is neither mortal  or witch hunter, but something in between. 

“You will suffer for your art, but you need not leave home to do so. You will dig deep to unearth your true calling, here, in Greendale”

She’s literally telling him she has a calling here, and the digging deep refers to the gates of hell. Lilith literally sets the groundwork here for Harvey become the fighter he is rather than a hunter. And I find that so important. And it shows that when she’s left to her own devices, Lilith tends to help more than hinder, even if she thinks she’s doing the opposite. 

And then there’s Ambrose, who has a lesson much like Zelda’s; don’t fucking trust Blackwood. Anything Blackwood related, Lilith does her utmost best to sabotage. Yet, Zelda still marries him and Ambrose still gets used by him. She tried, people, she tried! She also tries to stop Ambrose finding out about Luke’s fate for some reason. 

“ I think in this case perhaps not knowing the truth is better”

It’s quite possible this is is a case of reverse-psychology; she knows refuses to tell Ambrose about Luke will make him find out about it. 

However, Lilith chooses not to do a reading for Dr C or Hilda, which, admittedly, is more about episode time availabilty than anything else, but still...why wouldn’t she? And she tells them she thinks they’re a lovely couple, and that she’ll do Hilda next time and I do think Lilith was genuinely having plans for them...but whether these plans will ever be shown in the show is highly unlikely, haha. 

And then she gets back to the house in her glamour and we, as the audience, discover who Mrs McG really is. 

“Well, I have had a glorious day. And productive let me tell you. I’m plumbed the depths of their tiny minds, plucking all sorts of juicy titbits”

Did you though, Lilith, did you? Because from what I see, it seems she gave more than she received, like she might have had a little glimpse into vulnerabilities, but the lessons her card readings gave sort of negated most of them?

“Never hurts to have a sharpened blade handy”

WHAT SHARPENED BLADE??? WHERE???? Is she just making up shit to Stolas to make it look like she was doing something more with her day than simply noseying into their lives and giving them little nuggets of quite useful advice? But delivering it in a slightly unnerving way, because that’s where she gets her fun?

“In the coming war, Stolas, no one can be trusted. Why the Dark Lord taught me that himself”

That line hurts, because it could be he taught her through the fact he’s proven he can’t be trusted, but it could also be because he’s gotten involved with her other relationships (all kinds, I don’t just mean romantic) tempting them, to ensure they betrayed her so she’d learned to trust no one beyond his selected circle? Either way it’s showing that Lilith has had a very harsh, lonely existence. It’s also foreshadowing for the fact that even Stolas can’t be trusted.

“And who knows? If the apocalypse is upon us, even his plans might go awry”

The fact she says if instead of when shows that Lucifer is definitely not sharing all his plans with her, because even something as big as that still carries a level of uncertainty. 

“And it would be every woman for herself”

The way she lifts her chin here, defensively, determined, and how she specifies woman, which means she’s excluding Lucifer from this statement, I think shows she’s already considered ruling without him, that there’s a chance he won’t give her the throne and she might have to take it. But she knows how powerful it is and that’s too risky to ever try...unless his plans go awry and ‘all hell breaks loose’, in which case there’s opportunity. 

Cut to Stolas looking silently concerned by this statement, because he’s Satan’s spy and Lilith is monologuing about doing things for herself...

And then she does a one-card reading for herself. And it is a genuine reading, she draws properly, and she doesn’t know what she’s going to get, you see how tense she is, wondering what the reading will be...but then she sees, and she’s surprised at first, but then it becomes a focus, a fixation, and it’s the first time I think that Lilith sees what she genuinely could be. The Empress. And the Empress rules with no man at her side.