#//Ches this is not what I meant by be nice to Leo gdi

[likeswallowstosea]

“Well, you are the expert on that. That, and taking me way too seriously when I’m playing with you.” Who was Ches to talk when she was giving him such a serious response, still he had to recognize when she was being a brat and pulling his leg by now, right? But all this serious talk about resilience was leading her to think he wasn’t catching into the game. “I promise Grouchland isn’t in peril. You know you’re allowed to crack a smile, right? Isn’t me keeping you on your toes to avoid soul destroying levels of boredom the entire reason you keep me around?”

If boredom felt the same way for other people as it did for her, she couldn’t blame people putting up with her for the sole purpose of keeping them entertained. A punch to the face even felt better than having nothing to do. She didn’t understand how anyone could stand it.

“Maybe, but Leo, babe, I know you, and I know the Wall. No, that choice makes perfect sense with you as a person. And that’s okay!” Maybe Ches’s response wasn’t helping, but there’s no way Leo didn’t see the parallels. Her theory on favorite concept albums saying a lot about the person who loved them so much felt solid. Solid enough that she can’t help but shift uncomfortably when Leo’s gaze stays locked on her, urging her to say more about Hospice. No, there was no way she was getting into how mutually destructive his romantic relationships seemed to veer, how in ways sometimes it felt as if he was both entities at the same time, or any of the other thoughts that had popped into her mind the moment he mentioned the album.

But he doesn’t press further, and with a deep breath, the tension in her shoulders eases. No, this was better left to slide right past them.

Was Leo hesitating? She raises an eyebrow, surprise lighting up her eyes for a brief moment before he goes in, just as she’d expected him to. In all honesty, after his reaction to what she’d said about his choices, she had fully predicted he'd go in for blood. Was something wrong? Had she completely overestimated Leo's reaction to her daring to point the mirror towards him - even in the lightest way humanly possible - or was the worst yet to come? “That was way nicer than I expected from you. I'd be lying if I said my therapist would disagree with your analysis of The Dark Side of the Moon for me. Not that I don't thrive under pressure, of course, but your point isn't without merit.” Well, that wasn't the entire truth but Ches wasn't about to admit how right she thought he was. Hypocritical or not, she didn't want to deal with him trying to tell her to slow down. Maybe it should have alarming that she’d thought the same thing about her own choices in concept albums, and she didn’t see it as a sign to stop what she was doing despite the very clear consequences laid out in front of her.

But when Leo gets to A Thousand Suns, there's that sting. Did he really just compare her to an atomic bomb? Maybe he wasn't going as light as she'd taken his first reading to be. “I suppose I deserve that one. When we first met, I caused an unjustifiable amount of destruction to you. I can see why you'd think the consequences of hatred and having to pick yourself up out of the dust of your own ruin and accept what you’ve done are fitting themes for me. And yeah, sometimes the game is rigged from the start but sometimes you to face the horrors you committed and go ‘oh yeah, that was me and it was fucked up.’” Maybe not a ramble Leo wanted to be privy to, but it was too late now - the words were already out of her mouth. “Like I want to be offended you’re like ‘oh yeah, nuclear warfare sounds on brand for you,’ but you aren’t wrong. What I did to you back then was toxic.”

"And I'm pretty sure people just hear what they want to hear." Leo was certainly one to talk, though. After spending the majority of his adolescence in denial, he had little room to criticize others for altering their perception to match what was the easiest for them to take in and digest. "Oh- so annoying me to the point of wanting to take a page out of Van Gogh's book is meant to be you generously building my resilience for unpredictability? That's kind of you, but other people - and the world itself - were way ahead of you with that one." He had to learn how to be on his toes and be on the lookout for every disaster long before he met Ches. "Or, I just know that The Wall is objectively one of the best concept albums of all time, and anyone who disagrees either hasn't heard it, hadn't paid attention, or is just trying to be different because they think they're special." Although he wasn't even sure who he was trying to fool at that point - as he listened to that album on repeat, there were moments that he felt like he could have written some of the songs themself with how close to home they struck. As Ches transitioned to Hospice, Leo kept his gaze locked on her, almost daring her to continue her thought. Even as she did, he knew it wasn't what she was initially thinking, and he almost pushed further, asking if she saw Leo as the cancerous entity entrapping the narrator in their web of self destruction, or as the protagonist who continuously tore himself to shreds because he couldn't let go. Either Leo realized both would be bitter pills to swallow, or that he simply didn't want to know, he let the topic pass. When she invited him to the shooting range, he took a pause, as if to gauge his options and what would actually be productive. But it didn't take long before he decided it was only fair. "Dark Side of the Moon seems on brand, considering the whole album is exploring themes of feeling unfulfilled by life and driven to insanity trying to keep up with societal pressures," he said nonchalantly with a shrug, knowing how hard it was for her to stay afloat of all of the pressure - whether it was coming from her agent, friends, family, society in general, though most of all, herself... "And how by the time it's over, there's no room for the other side because the darkness tainted and engulfed everything that was once meaningful or positive." The next album, he wasn't as familiar with, but from what he had heard, as well as heard about it, it felt fitting as well. "As for A Thousand Suns, a album about the literal end of the world sounds about right for you, too. Not to mention the survivors guilt theme that comes up throughout the album."