#//But certain times; Diluc’s words can hurt and li bc we; like when he stated he got rid of things he had no need for

[dutybcrne]

Kaeya most definitely refers to his and Diluc’s bickering as Enrichment to anyone who asks why he continues to stick around even if they don’t get along, no matter how hurt Kae’s feelings actually get or how viciously he ends up poking at Diluc’s through their interactions.

Yes, it’s his way of coping with their now lack of closeness and what is said. No, he will NOT stop seeking him out. Ever.

[kae-karo]

Kae kae! I wanna hear about your thoughts: what is your headcanon for what happened during that night between Kaeya and Diluc? So many people have different thoughts About what happened and I want to hear yours!

hi hi hello dear!!! oof okay okay well for me i do a lot of speculating based on fic and like. i'll write different things depending on what i want to do with a story, BUT here are my thoughts on what may have happened in canon:

first, the basics/what we know based on character stories - kaeya's vision story (x) is long as hell but worth a refresher read, cause it talks about kaeya's internal struggle between his duty to khaenri'ah and his loyalty to diluc and crepus, and how crepus' death upset the balance. while it doesn't explicitly state a resolution to his struggle, it does go on to talk about how guilt consumed him over the fact that he didn't share in crepus' final moments nor in diluc's grieving - he'd instead stayed back, reminded of 'that ancient plot' (which i think we can safely assume to mean his supposed purpose in mondstadt, in service of khaenri'ah)

the vision story goes into the bare bones version of what happened that night - kaeya admitted the truth of who he was, he expected diluc's anger, diluc and kaeya crossed blades only for a rush of elemental power to overcome kaeya as he received his vision

what i find particularly interesting here is this line about kaeya receiving his vision: "But now, for the first time ever, he was facing his brother as his true self."

vision lore speculation incoming, because i think that it helps us better understand kaeya's situation

we've since learned (thanks inazuma) that a vision responds to (and is inextricably tied to) a person's ambition - i know i've talked before about theories with regards to why certain people receive certain elements, since i believe (someone correct me if i'm wrong) we know now for certain that visions are handed out by the archon of that element

i've speculated in the past that the motivator for a cryo vision was the fear of losing someone or something dear to them (this works well for a few chars: kaeya - diluc, diona - her father, qiqi - her life) but starts to get a little forced if it's applied to other cryo chars

but with a bigger pool of chars and a canon explanation for why one might receive a cryo vision, i think my revised assessment works better: the ambition that a cryo vision responds to is a relinquishing of a past self in pursuit of one's true self. or, perhaps a less optimistic take, the relinquishing of a fantasy life for a more complex but truer one

ganyu, setting aside her life as solely qilin and accepting both halves of herself when she took up her position among the liyue qixing. rosaria, choosing to fight for her life against those who would use and control her. eula, setting down her learned grievances in pursuit of a life and a 'vengeance' that felt right to her. chongyun's persistent desire to become a true exorcist. ayaka's acceptance of her leadership role and diligence in her study of skills (that did not come naturally to her) in order to represent her clan. diona's eschewing of her childish desire for her father to be the man she wanted him to be in favor of attempting to accept her father for who he is (she offers to mix him a drink once she knows that he's safe). for qiqi i think it could easily be taken in a literal sense - her past life ended, a new, more complicated one began

for kaeya, his vision story says it all: he gave up his idyllic life of a pretty lie in favor of being honest with diluc in who he truly is, even though that only makes his life more complicated. as was stated in his story, he feels "he must live the rest of his life under the heavy burden of lies"

[unrelated kaeya aside: in his story 2, it says "On the contrary, he actually enjoys putting people into the difficult position of making tough decisions." perhaps you're projecting a bit there, hm kaeya?]

ANYWAY all of this was basically to say that i think kaeya admitted the truth of who he was and why he was in mond, and 'expected diluc's anger' because he'd kept it secret this the whole time. had lived a whole life growing up with diluc and chose to stay silent. and diluc just lost his father for fuck's sake lmao so he's definitely emotionally overwhelmed

bc in kaeya's character story 5, he and diluc are described as "knowing each other's thoughts and intentions without a word", which says to me that they...basically told each other everything? knew each other too well, but kaeya had still chosen to hide this from diluc. of course diluc would feel betrayed, and of course kaeya would expect him to - he knows him well, after all

but he saw this fight as his punishment, or perhaps losing diluc as his punishment, or (if you want to be especially grim about it) maybe even losing his own life as a punishment for his secrecy - ultimately, though, i can't quite bring myself to believe that diluc cares necessarily about kaeya's actual ancestry (or like...even his supposed duty to khaenri'ah), more just...that he hid this from diluc

and i think that kaeya receiving his cryo vision, the perfect combatant to diluc's fire (well, sort of lmao) wasn't necessarily what stopped their fight - i think it gave diluc the chance to step back and breathe and see kaeya for a moment, outside of his own anger and hurt, and recognize that he didn't want to fight. he just didn't want to like. process his emotions either lmao (diluc bb u have some issues)

and so kaeya left, burdened with this vision (he describes it as the 'stern reminder' that he must live a life of lies), and he and diluc never really...figured their shit out. diluc ran away, kaeya learned to live without him

and kaeya, to me, seems to have developed that mindset of like...'diluc is exactly as he was that night and has not changed'. ie he seems to act as though diluc is still secretly angry with him, in spite of the evidence that shows that...well, he's probably still not processing those emotions BUT it does show that he cares still, somewhere in there (in his vision story, it says "He did not discuss the past. But he did not deny his past, either." and i wonder if he has his ways of showing that he did care, and probably still does - like the vase, like his continued choice to remain in kaeya's presence when there seems to be no need in the 'a child's secret' quest)

askldfjklsdfj i hope this wasn't too excruciating to get through, i know i rambled quite a lot on some tangentially related theories but ty for the ask dear!!!