#// rip lemon dad

[shiroi---kumo]

Help I love him. Sitruuna Shokki (see-true-nah show-key) || Lemon Shock

He's Tuli's husband and Sinfonia's father. He's a member of the royal knights and friends with Taivas. He died in the war with Windaria when Sinfonia was very young so Sinfonia has almost no memories of him, but Sitruuna loved his wife and son so very much.

Sitruuna is the one who named Sinfonia.

[starkeysprincess]

I definitely see stepbro!rafe spoiling you with all the cute girly things you could ever want, of course including clothes, but he isn’t afraid to be absolutely heartless if he’s upset with you. Let me explain. I am a visionary so there’s details.😌

Ok so he calls you into his room, right? He’s got certain pieces from each outfit you’ve worn over the past week. He explains that since you enjoy his other punishments so much, he has to be more harsh, and these are all the things you’ve worn lately that he deems slutty. He picks up your loveshackfancy skirt you walked around showing the entire country club his ass in, rips it right in half. The for love and lemons milkmaid dress you wore to happy hour that had Topper and Kelce shifting in their seats, torn right down the front, buttons flying everywhere. and he keeps going as you’re standing there crying begging him to stop, until he gets to what might as well be the the Mona Lisa to you; your vintage pink Dior denim miniskirt that as far as you knew, was the last existing one in the world that you had went to the ends of to find.

It was also what you were wearing just last night during Rafe’s party when you were drunkenly dancing on top of the counter, flashing everybody within sight your bare cunt before Rafe hurled you over his shoulder and brought you upstairs to “put you to bed.” He was so beside himself, he told you you’d both deal with it the next day too, and now here you were, about to watch him destroy your most prized possession.

Within a split second you’re trying to run out the door and screaming for Ward, and he yanks you into him by your hair as he claps his hand over your mouth. “Will you shut the fuck up?” You obviously keep fighting and squirming until he turns you around “ALRIGHT ALRIGHT…look, kid, be quiet. I’m not gonna rip it. just don’t get me in trouble and I’ll buy you all new shit. Same stuff. Right now, yeah?” When you nod and sigh in relief he takes his hand off your mouth. You make him promise but he also makes you agree to take an extra punishment “otherwise I’ll rip the shit right in half and you can cry to my dad all you want” and you’re begging and pleading telling him you’ll do whatever he wants, just spare your precious skirt.

“Okay,” He’d say. “Well then you better pray to Dior himself that you can handle an hour of this tonight while everyone’s sleeping” smirking and pulling a magic wand out of his night table. “Fight with me and it’ll be til fuckin’ morning.” All you can do is stare in dread.

nonnie, thank you for being a visionary 🙏🏽

his mean ass would pull this shit and when you’re starting to cry because those are all of your favorite pieces, his dick is twitching in his pants but as soon as you’re trying to run out the room to yell for ward, he’s yanking you back into the room, his chest pressed against your back and covering your mouth, telling you to shut the fuck up

telling him you’ll do whatever he wants is practically fucking music to his ears because that’s exactly what he was hoping you’d say and you know you’re in for it when he pulls out the magic wand, goosebumps littering your skin from the last time he used it on you

[mcflymemes]

PROMPTS FROM SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS *  some of my favorite quotes from the show, adjust as necessary

his chops are too righteous!

it’s evil. it’s diabolical. it’s lemon scented!

lord knows i’ve tried.

two words. na. chos.

yeah, i get called that a lot.

it's just a cruel reminder that i'm single and likely to remain that way forever.

what doesn't kill you usually succeeds in the second attempt.

stupidity isn't a virus, but it sure is spreading like one.

goodbye everyone, i’ll remember you all in therapy.

don't you have to be stupid somewhere else?

i used to have a kidney stone. everything passes eventually.

you can't fool me. i listen to public radio!

stop it, [name], you're scaring him!

do instruments of torture count?

give to the children's fund? what have the children ever done for me?

this is not your average, everyday darkness. this is... advanced darkness.

what's better than serving up smiles?

i guess i'm not wearing any pants today.

did you smell it? that smell. a kind of smelly smell. the smelly smell that smells… smelly.

wake me up when i care.

look at all the hip, young people eating salads!

he was so ugly that everyone died.

the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time!

well, the way i see it, there are three possibilites.

hibernation is the opposite of beauty sleep.

that’s it mister! you just lost your brain privileges!

good people don’t rip other people’s arms off.

well, we lost our car again.

pull your pants up. we’re going home.

you were right. fighting is for children.

i’m a good noodle!

remember, licking doorknobs is illegal on other planets.

your ceiling is talking to me!

we don’t need television.

the inner machinations of my mind are an enigma.

i’ll have you know i stubbed my toe last week while watering my spice garden and i only cried for twenty minutes.

hey, if i close my eyes, it doesn’t seem so dark.

is mayonnaise an instrument?

those are some big words. i’ve never heard you use them before.

my vocabulary is infinitely expanding.

we destroyed your most prized possession.

we shall never deny a guest even the most ridiculous request.

let’s see, a five letter word for happiness. money.

can i have everybody’s attention?

i have to use the bathroom.

do you know what day today is?

could you not stand so close? you’re making me claustrophobic.

i used your clarinet to unclog my toilet.

are they laughing at us?

if you can’t do the time, don’t do the crime.

he needs us now more than ever.

what is today, but yesterday’s tomorrow?

ice is just a myth.

this working out thing isn’t working out.

i can’t see my forehead.

i have a good idea, and no one else thinks so.

look at you, so young and happy.

i prefer to be an idiot!

sounds like a pretty good deal to me, what do you say?

don’t be sad, buddy. turn that frown upside down!

i’m ugly and i’m proud!

good! say it louder!

i can’t do it! i can’t be away from my best friend!

i need you! i can’t handle this myself!

i’m just going on vacation for a few days.

i was kinda hoping that you come along with us…

enjoy the cake everybody!

now we never have to be apart, even when we’re not together.

this is great. see you forever!

i have to keep you safe while i get some work done!

maybe he doesn’t like us.

no, are you kidding?

i propose a toast to new friends!

i guess i’ll have to move in back with my mom and dad.

he’s a thief. look at the lust in his eye…

why can’t you just accept our friendship?

[chained-sweater]

random ass headcanons (the curtis gang)

— dallas has asthma

— johnny's a sassy bitch (it's canon)

— sodapop's lactose intolerant (canon too, i think, idk)

— both two-bit and ponyboy have a shellfish allergy

— steve's allergic to lemons

— dallas has a pet cat that no one knows about

— darry loves kids/babies

— johnny wacks people with his crutches when they piss him off (rip two-bit)

   ↑ did i mention that johnny's irritable? 'cause he is. 

— soda loves braiding hair

— darry can't cook, but he can bake

— ponyboy bites everything and everyone just because

   ↑ they're also really strong. they've surprised people with their strength. especially in rumbles. 

— dally has a hard time finding clothes/shoes that fit 'cause bro's just so fucking ginormous (he takes after his dad in physique)

— steve loves elvis presley. and he sounds just like him when he sings.

— darry had his first kiss with paul (they were drunk, lol)

   ↑ i hc them to be (very) toxic exs

— ms. mathews adopts johnny after the events of the book, so he and two are brothers (literally). they're one big happy family 🥰✨🫶

   ↑ mrs. cade gets thrown in the slammer and mr. cade is sent to an asylum (i hc that he's severaly mentally ill)

— two-bit is THE BEST cook you will ever meet in your life

   ↑ and yes, i see those hcs that say they'd burn down the house, but this is my au and this is how i view the character, so shh

— sodapop's allergic to cats

  · this is literally how they argue. no exaggeration. ↓

   ↑ this does not stop him from petting/playing with them though. he'll come home covered in hives 'n shit and darry just sighs so loud (bro's tired af) 

— dallas and darry argue like an old married couple 😭✋

[sweetlemongrove]

Angsty Shit, Lemon's Version

Hey so remeber when I accidentally deleted my whole blog? Yeeaaaaaah, well I found some of my old content on Hammy's (@capitalisticveins) blog so I wanted to repost it here

So yeah, enjoy some sad

📼Angel gets mugged/drops their engagement ring and can’t get it back. They feel horrible having to confess it to David, guilty for losing it for both the money and work he put in to picking it out 

📼Asher gets flashbacks from his time during the Inversion

📼Milo gets a phone call/visit from his dad

📼Aaron has been spending way too much time at the office. A suspicious amount.

📼Ollie gets sick. Really sick. Needs hospitalization level sick. 

📼The usually (flirty) physically affectionate Gavin stops being so cuddly and touchy towards Freelancer, for supposedly no reason. 

📼Lasko gets stood up

📼Cutie gets help they need in order to improve as a partner. Alas, Geordi has moved on, and is extraordinarily happy with his new one, another telepath who doesn’t constantly read his mind 

📼Kody comes back. 

📼Sam gets a visit from Alexis. Darlin is about to rip her head off. 

📼Lovely cries over the lose of their powers. (Same thing with the Milo shifting episode with no happy ending)

Welp that's all for today folks. I'm going to try and either find/remake my old posts/writing but please feel free (and please do) send in requests or ideas for me. Help me get back in the swing of things. Thank you so much :)

Edit: I'd also like to add that Hammy wrote Lovely's angst idea as a fic! Go check it out!

[lisbeth-kk]

The May prompts from @calaisreno continues! Today's prompt : box

Chapter 2 of The Luckiest Girl in the World.

Summary: John bans Rosie's teddy bear from dining with them, which sends the toddler into a tantrum of sherlockian proportions. Cunning women to the rescue.

Two Years Old

The teddy bear Mum had bought me before I was born, was my favourite plushie. That is to say, my favourite plushie to toss around and force to do things a plushie isn’t supposed to be forced to do. Eating, for example. Dad forbade me to bring him to the table after I’d smeared his face with Bolognese sauce. To this day, it’s still visible stains of tomato sauce on Ted’s face.

My temper as a toddler, was apparently just as fierce as Dad’s according to Sherlock, the man I named Lock when I was around 18 months old. The tantrums I pulled when Ted was banned from the kitchen table, could be heard all the way down to 221A and Nana.

“Are you two trying to kill my goddaughter?” she scoffed when she came up to investigate.

“Of course not, Hudders. I don’t commit crimes, I solve them,” Sherlock retorted.

Nana was totally unfazed by this statement, muttering something about a stolen ashtray, before she fussed over me, trying to calm me down. She was partly successful and sat down beside me with Ted in her lap, letting him watch me eat my fish fingers and carrots, but denying me to feed him. I’ve been told I pouted quite a lot during the meal.

***

My second godmother, Molly Hooper, came to visit the next day, bearing gifts. Nana had evidently sought her out for advice.

“It’s not her birthday yet, Molly,” Dad complained, not wanting me to be more spoiled than I already was.

“I know that,” Molly said affronted. “It’s not for Rosie, but for Ted.”

“You bought gifts for a stuffed animal?” Sherlock inquired astounded by this curious gesture.

“I did. Do you want to open it for him, Rosie?” Molly asked me.

I didn’t need any persuasion and ripped the gift paper to shreds in no time. Inside the box was a soft drawstring bag, and inside the bag were a variety of lively coloured foods made of plastic. Corn, carrot, cod, cutlet, grapes, potato, sausage, broccoli, cauliflower, tomato, pear, lemon and two bananas.

“Food for Ted!” Molly announced and looked expectantly at me along with Dad and Sherlock.

I beamed at her and gave her a tight hug, before I fetched Ted to let him look at all the delicacies he could look forward to at dinner that night.

Even Sherlock admitted that Molly was quite the genius after that clever purchase.

“I only surround myself with proper intelligent people,” he told Dad when he pointed it out.

“High praise, Sherlock,” Dad teased him.

“Don’t push your luck, John,” Sherlock huffed, but I heard the smile in his voice.

This can also be read on AO3

Tagging you guys in the replies, cause the tagging is failing at the moment.

[galacticseonghwa]

será una noche inolvidable - chenle profiles

CHENLE and his disciples

CHENLE makes everyone around him rip their hair out, he’s your typical old money (too) rich male species who rides a motorbike. although he hates showing it he actually has a very big heart and gets upset very easily. he has some unknown beef with ricky (it’s really only one sided. but chenle’s a trend follower). he loves music, it’s his back up career path if biking doesn’t work.

now this man, jeno. he may look big and buff and manly but there is not one thought behind those eyes. he’s just tryna get through life man. he loves riding but can’t be bothered making it his lifeline the way chenle has. he relies on the funds the government (chenle) pays him until he’s finished with school. he can be very smart if he actually bothers.

jaemin is somewhat the ‘normal’ friend. he’s a cat dad, but as normal as a cat dad can be. if you mess with his cats (and friends ig) he will, in the nicest way possible, skin you alive and feed you to pigs. he’s a very loving and kind soul who loves attention from anyone and everyone. he’s street smart not book smart.

haechan is a little shit. he loves stirring the pot and seeing the reactions of people. although it may not seem like it he cares very deeply about his friends and family, he would watch the world turn into flames and burn if anyone hurts those he’s closest to. he also loves gaslighting people into believing he’s dating jisung which the younger does not really appreciate.

the youngest in the friend group, jisung. he's in both y/n and chenle's inner circle. he loves joking around with his closest friends, but he's also very serious when it comes to school life, he's the first person anyone in the friend group goes to for hw help. he very much still loves anything space. he loves riding with chenle but doesn't take it as seriously.

yn profile | masterlist | next

TAGLIST — (open!) @sinisxtea @injunnie-lemon @chenlesfavorite

authors note! — chapter one will be released later tonight (7:30 AED)

[richeeduvie]

thinking about high or drunk kendall making a move on baby in logan au that he really can’t play off as just being friendly or whatever

maybe logan or roman sees it

"You're drunk, Ken-that...I can't um...I don't think I excuse that but you're drunk. You're not thinking right. That's it. That will be it, let's get you out of he-"

Baby's shaky. There's something in her that's twenty years younger and so terrified, but there's a need to comfort him, excuse Kendall. Maybe that's what is twenty years younger - or maybe that's just her. It grew with her, hidden away.

He tried to kiss her.

"Yeah...I-I-I'm so fucking sorry, that was-I didn't...I did-"

"I'm telling, Dad. Good fucking luck, fucker."

Their heads snap to Roman. His words sounded smiley, but his brows are harsh with the vein along is forehead. He walks quickly, arms nearly straight.

"Fuck. Roman. Roman. Ro-"

"He's going to go Greek and rip your cock off as punishment, squeeze a lemon onto the severed meat and you know what, Ken? You deserve it. Everything that I was sorta on you about and afraid of when I was fifteen? It becomes obvious after three shots? You're losing your touch.

"Roma-"

"Fuck off! Where's Dad?"

"Roman, he's drunk. He knows it was a mistake. He didn't want to-"

"You're a victim as much as you are a monster. Don't talk-get the fuck off me! What are you doi-"

Kendall's pulling at him, holding him back and fighting Roman's own pull and flicks. Slaps to the bicep.

"I didn't mean to. I didn't like it. I didn't-want that to happen. You wanna get Dad into fucking rage and ruins cause of one mistake? He's gonna get angry at her like it was her fault and it wasn't. You can't add shit to this family because of one...one kiss that didn't mean to happen-"

"I can do whatever you want, just like you, apparently."

"Don't tell him, dude-"

Baby's muscles are tight and her heart burns.

"Roman, please. He just-"

"That wasn't your fault, and Dad will know it. Did he try to play it friendly? That attempted makeout? No. I was there. What am I talking about. Kendall is obviously trying to make the guilt virtuous. Good fucking luck, brother."

There's something in Roman that's twenty years younger too, it's what makes him childishly and whiningly fight the hold and pull of Kendall before walking quick to find Logan.

Kendall doesn't deserve another point in time where he does this to them, even if she isn't his anymore. Cause she's always his, and Dad will fix it. And he really just wants to see Kendall shit himself, especially after that sickness in his stomach grew at the sight of that kiss.

It's his body's muscle memory, to be obsessed and perpetually jealous with her. He's never training himself to forget his ways.

[dudduk4992]

A beached surfer, part 1

Caleb sighed, looking out onto the beach. It was a perfect day, with not a cloud in the sky, the brilliant yellow sand was teeming with people, talking, sunbaking, playing volleyball, building sandcastles, and splashing in the water. Everywhere he looked, he saw people enjoying the sun.

The hotel next door teamed with tourists, just like it seemed to do every summer when Caleb’s dad sent him here to work at his uncle’s restaurant, “The Seaside Crab”  where Caleb worked during his summers instead of enjoying it like everyone else. It always seemed worse to think about, but when he got there it wasn’t so bad, especially since his uncle actually paid him properly now, and with all the tourism they were reeling in, Caleb could only imagine what his bank account would be looking like. Caleb sighed again,

"Caleb! Stop mucking about and clear some tables!" Caleb heard his big sailor-looking uncle yell from within the confines of the kitchen at the front of the restaurant. Caleb gulped and quickly zoomed around the restaurant, clearing tables one at a time.

As Caleb cleaned up another table, stacking the dishes and wiping at the stains on the table, he resumed his daydreaming position at the large wooden bar, adjacent to a long, tall wall lined with glass windows. As he stared even longer, his eyes stayed in the same position, looking out the window despite hearing the front of the cafe's door jingle.

A shadow shunted his daydreaming; he noticed a tall, blonde, wide figure standing at the bar in his peripheral vision. It took Caleb a moment or two to realise that the stranger was waiting for him. "Could I get an iced tea, two lemons please?" Caleb heard the hunky surfer say in his deep voice. It was none other than the legendary Kanen Ariki. A local legend around Marina Beach. He was the only surfer to catch some huge waves, not to mention his insane popularity. When he wasn’t surfing or partying, he worked as a lifeguard at the beach.

Kanen was Polynesian and only 21, two years older than Caleb- and was fully ripped. Big, buff and covered head to toe in muscle, he had a massive chest with huge, meaty pecs and pink cherry-sized nipples, his thighs and calves enormous, and his abs well defined. His face was wide and handsome with a strong jawline, his eyes bright brown with a cut through his left eyebrow. He had various rings in both ears, as well as a double piercing through his right eyebrow and belly button.

His hair was cut in short curtains and dyed blonde while the roots remained black. The hunk also had some impressive Polynesian tattoos; several bands around his right arm, wrist and leg, as well as some triangles, reaching up to the bottom of his belly button. He wore a blue faded singlet, black board shorts and no shoes.

"I- uh, ohhhh..." Caleb Stuttered, gazing in awe at the surfer, he completely forgot what he was doing as he watched Kanen take a table number and sit down.... right next to where Caleb was cleaning. Was this really happening!? Caleb couldn't believe it!

"Hey man, not to rush you, but my stomach’s telling me it’s time to eat," Kanen said with a laugh, noticing that Caleb was stuck daydreaming for almost ten minutes.

"Oh! sorry!" Caleb yelped. "What can I get you today? we have some specials on, if you’re interested, I can show you what they are..." Caleb trailed off, gazing at the blond hunk's breathtaking abs.

"Uh yeah, I'll just get a club sandwich, extra meat, extra cheese, and double side pickle, please. And two iced teas while you're at it" Kanen says with a wink, his voice filled with that deep swagger many surfers carried.

“Right... right, is there anything else?” Caleb murmured.

“Nope! You’re good to go…” Kanen squinted at Caleb’s name tag. “Caleb.” Kanen looked up with a grin. “Nice to meet you, Caleb.” It took Caleb everything he had not to melt at the surfer hunk’s words.

“That… that should be ready soon sir.” Caleb piped, turning and hurrying over to the counter. As he did, he quickly scribbled the order on a piece of paper. However, what Caleb didn’t realize was that he had scribbled Kanen's order underneath a previous order that had come and gone, a family meal in fact. Caleb blindly handed his uncle the order without noticing and went back to clearing tables and taking more orders, sneaking glancing at Kanen when he could. Ten minutes passed as Caleb continued to work, occasionally glancing up at Kanen while he did.

Caleb eventually began to zone back into his work, prioritizing his tasks, rather than gazing at Kanen. Caleb was in the middle of clearing a recently emptied table when he heard someone approach him from behind. He turned around and found himself staring at Kanen, who stood there with a smile on his face.

"Hey there again." Kanen greeted him. "Sorry to bother you, Caleb- but I was just wondering if you knew when my food would be ready? It’s been nearly fifteen minutes." Kanen said with an innocent smile.

Caleb felt his eyes widen. He hadn't realized how much time had passed since he took Kanen's order. "Oh- uh, lemme go check for you." Caleb said quickly as he rushed off to the counter, where his uncle was busy cooking.

"Hey, Uncle Finn!" Caleb gasped. "A customer asked when his food would be out, he's been waiting for fifteen minutes."

"Well, I sure as hell won't be able to figure out his meal if you don't tell me what it is!" Uncle Finn grunted back as he chopped the head off a fish.

"Uhh... '1 club sandwich, double pickle and extra everything' plus two ice teas... For Kanen Ariki." Caleb said aloud, feeling a little embarrassed by the situation.

Uncle Finn glanced across the orders above his head and frowned. "Son, I dunno what you did wrong but I don't have that order here." He muttered. "I DO have an order for one Kanen Ariki, and it does have that sandwich and those ice teas, but there's more than what you said."

Before Caleb could say a word, his uncle placed a full tray on the bench, and it was indeed not what Kanen had ordered; 2 extra large burgers and sides of chips, a large panini, a regular garden salad, A T-bone steak, 2 plates of fish and chips, A regular lasagna, a basket of garlic bread- and of course, the two ice teas and the club sandwich to top it all off.

"Oh Caleb..." Uncle Finn leaned on the counter and covered his eyes. "How did you mess this up." he looked up with a tired smile. "You truly are one of a kind, lad."

Caleb felt himself grow pale as he realized he had messed up.

"I- I'm so sorry..." Caleb murmured, and the boy felt his face go from pale to beet red.

Uncle Finn chuckled and placed a hand over his shoulder. "Don't worry about it kid. I know you'll do better next time, you always do. Just apologize and tell the guy there was a mixup and give him the things he ordered- bring the rest back to me so I can bin it."

Caleb nodded silently and took the tray of food, turning on one heel and quickly made his way across the restaurant. As he approached Kanen's table, he found Kanen smiling at him, but his smile quickly turned to confusion as Caleb set the tray down on the table.

"Hey bro... I didn't order all of this?" he said, confused.

"No you didn't." Caleb confirmed, avoiding eye contact. "I- uh… there was a mixup in the kitchen... and your order got put down with a previous order- but here."

Caleb picked up the plate with the gigantic club sandwich on top. Uncle Finn had used an entire loaf of bread, sliced through the half, and put all of the fixings inside to create the biggest sandwich both Caleb and Kanen had ever seen in their lives.

"W-woah dude... I said club sandwich, not a surfboard panini!" Kanen practically yelped, grinning from ear to ear. "Guess I'm getting my money's worth!" The tanned surfer laughed, a hand resting on his exposed belly. "Seriously dude... thanks for this... you're awesome!" He said. "But I wanted to ask, what's gonna happen to all of this?"

"Uh, I'll probably have to dump it." Caleb replied. "I can't give it to other customers who ordered the same thing. Health code, you know?"

Kanen looked down at the food with a frown. "You can't throw this all away. There's enough food here for a whole family..." he said, gesturing with his hands at the large amount of food in front of him.

"I know." Caleb felt awful, but he really didn't know what else could be done.

"Here, just leave it with me and I'll eat as much of it as I can." Kanen replied with a shrug.

Caleb blinked. "What?"

"It's either that or the garbage disposal, and I hate it when good food is wasted." Kanen grinned. "So yeah, leave it with me."

"Uh... okay, are you sure?" Caleb murmured, placing it all on the table, including the drinks, before picking the empty tray up.

"Yeah man, no worries, I'll see how much I can polish off. Thanks again!" Kanen smiled.

Caleb nodded and left it at that and hurried back to his uncle to give him the tray. When he got to the counter, Uncle Finn was watching Kanen closely. "So he decided to keep all that food huh? Better than chucking it in the bin I say." Uncle Finn said with a chuckle. "He's got one big ass feed ahead of him!"

"Uhh yeah..." Caleb murmured, still blushing as he glanced back to the surfer boy and his massive meal.

***

Kanen wasn't sure if he would even be able to eat this much food. Here, he had arrived for a simple sandwich, and now he had a family-sized feast on top of that. Kanen worked on his original order first, drilling through the club sandwich at a steady pace. The mix of meat, cheese, pickle and lettuce made an explosion of flavour in his mouth as the young stud savoured every bite of the huge sandwich. He ate slowly, enjoying each and every morsel. As he neared the end of his sandwich, Kanen noted that he felt full, his stomach holding its regular curve after a simple meal like this- but his meal was far from over.

"Wow, that was amazing..." Kanen murmured to himself as he took a long sip from his first iced tea, before sighing and wiping his mouth with a napkin. He already felt kinda stuffed though, he thought looking down at his bulging gut.

But there was no time to waste, the food was there, and it needed to be eaten. After he finished the sandwich, Kanen dug into his burger with gusto. The paddy was juicy and fresh, stuck to a slice of melted cheese and accompanied by fresh crisp lettuce, tangy sauce, onions, bacon and tomato. It tasted incredible as he ate it, savouring every bite. With one burger done, the second followed in no time at all. With both now in his steadily growing belly, the young stud took a moment to finish the rest of his first iced tea, sucking down the sweet peach juice like water after a run.

"*BUARRP!*" Kanen belched and blushed as two customers close by glanced at him, Kanen ran a hand over his developing stomach under his singlet, before working on his two sides of chips, each slice of fried potato cooked to perfection as he drowned them in tomato sauce and tore into them ravenously.

The young surfer felt like he could take on the world, his gut was slowly expanding and so full of good food that it felt like he had swallowed a small soccer ball. He had never eaten this much in one sitting before, but he had to admit that he felt great. His muscles were well-fed, and his mind was clear, he felt good, and he was ready to tackle anything that came his way.

With that thought in mind, Kanen worked on his last side of chips and began eating slowly as he watched the people around him. After a few minutes, Kanen moved on his panini. The crust was crisp and the fillings were warm and delicious. The beef was tender and the cheese gooey, the flavors mixing together perfectly. Even though he already felt overly stuffed, Kanen devoured the panini in only a few bites, pausing to take sips from his second iced tea until both the tea and panini were gone.

Kanen burped again, this time not feeling as embarrassed, largely because of how stuffed the surfer stud felt. His slightly bloated muscle gut had expanded substantially, stretching his singlet even further than before as his underbelly dug into the hem of his boardshorts. Kanen knew he wasn't going to be able to fit into his pants for a while.

Now Kanen sat there, stuffed to bursting, yet content. He stared at the remains of his meal; the salad, Steak, double order of fish and chips, basket of garlic bread, and large lasagna, and wondered if he should just leave it there. But he couldn't bring himself to do it. If he did, then he would feel guilty for wasting such a large amount of food, and besides- something about this whole situation he had ended up in felt... good?

In a way eating all this food made Kanen feel amazing. The very idea of pushing the limits of his stomach, even though he was stuffed to the brim made Kanen's body tingle, and the thought of how big his gut would become made him more excited. Kanen took a deep breath and made his decision, he was going to finish every last piece of this food, and then he was going to enjoy a good long rest.

Eager now, Kanen filled a glass of water and downed it in one gulp before he started with the garden salad and garlic bread; The salad was light and refreshing, while the Garlic bread was hot and gooey and crispy. By the time he was done, the surfer was sweating and moaning, his belly was distended so much that it now jutted off of his body a good few inches. He could feel it stretching his singlet further, his gut pushing against the fabric as it grew. it had even begun to slide up due to the great volume of his gut, revealing a slither of his hairless belly.

Steadily running out of steam, Kanen turned his attention to the large steak. Kanen cut the steak into bite sized pieces and began going to work; the meat was tender and juicy, he found after the first mouthful, the juices running down his chin and dropping onto the singlet straining itself around his enormous gut. The steak was served with a side of fries and salad, both of which the hunk was able to finish off with relative ease. Kanen pulled at his boardshorts, which were unbelievably tight now. Kanen burped again, feeling up his tank of a belly, enjoying the fullness and tightness it caused.

He had no doubt that many of the customers in the restaurant were staring at him, especially the ones who had been here since the start and had seen how much food he had consumed. After finishing off the Steak, Kanen felt his gut throbbing now, his abs and stomach muscles burning tight as his belly begged him to stop eating, and that only made him want to eat more.

Kanen realized that if he was gonna get through the remains of the food, he was gonna need more drinks. By some streak of luck, the waiter boy Caleb passed by to clear a table, although Kanen could see that Caleb was also using this opportunity to stare at the surfer's impressive belly.

"Hey... *URP* Caleb?" Kanen spoke up with a long breath.

Caleb turned right around to face him, his cheeks flushed red. Caleb couldn’t belive how huge he had grown!

"Y-Yeah?" Caleb asked nervously, his eyes darting between Kanen's bulging gut and the huge amount of food that was still piled on the table.

"Do you *HIC* think you could grab me two more of those *BUUARP* iced teas?" Kanen asked, resting his hands on his belly.

"Uh... yeah of course," Caleb replied, his voice shaking as he quickly walked over to the kitchen, returning five minutes later with two bottles of iced tea.

"Thanks," Kanen replied with a shy smile.

"No problem... just let me know if you need anything else," Caleb said,  his face growing redder by the second. "I- need to go clear more tables." Caleb rushed off and Kanen couldn't help but laugh to himself. The poor guy looked so flustered, but he didn't blame him. Kanen could only imagine what a sight his gut must be for everyone else.

The fish and chips were by far the hardest to eat, although the battered Cod and chips were crunchy and tasty, they were both dry, and Kanen found himself gulping down a whole iced tea between the two servings. As he polished off the seafood, Kanen felt his belly grow tighter and tighter, it was beginning to push against his waistband as his gut now took up a good portion of his lap. It seemed like he might have to pull down his board shorts if it continued to get any larger.

Kanen had to stop himself from laughing as he marveled at how big his stomach had gotten, he had never been this big before. "Holy shit..." Kanen muttered, looking down at his stomach, which groaned and growled as it struggled to digest the mass amount of food inside. After another glass of water to wash down his throat, the young surfer made his way to his final course, the lasagna.

As he cut into the lasagna, he was surprised to find that it was still warm; the cheese, mince, sauce and pasta sheets melting as he placed the first forkful into his mouth. Kanen had to stifle back a moan as he ate, the taste was incredible. Even though he felt on the brink of bursting point, Kanen devoured the dish with relish, watching his obscenely huge muscle gut creep forward a bit with each delicious, gooey mouthful.

Part of Kanen knew he had eaten past his limit, and yet somehow he was still pushing on, the engorged stud stuffing himself with every ounce of willpower he had. It felt like an eternity before the plate was empty, his gut bloated and stretched beyond its limits, the weight of his belly pressing on his thighs as he sat there. When he was done, Kanen felt like a new man. His belly was stretched to its maximum capacity, obscenely huge and distended, making him look 9 months pregnant. But Kanen was happy with the blissful fullness that came with eating so much food. The weight of everything he had eaten, the pressure in his gut, the strain of his abs and the heat of digestion made him feel so tired.

"Ahhhhhhh!" Kanen moaned loudly as he threw back his head and let loose another deep, manly belch, the sound echoing throughout the restaurant. He closed his eyes, trying to hold in the next one but failing miserably. "Bwuaaarrrp!" Another loud belch escaped the surfer's lips as he looked at the large stack of empty plates in front of him. Something about it made Kanen feel proud, like he was some sort of gluttonous beast who was being rewarded for his excesses.

And so, Kanen struggled to stand up from his seat, his belly was so heavy and his abs stretched to the absolute limit, his legs felt like jelly as it took the stud a moment to adjust to his newfound weight. His singlet had ridden up so much that it only encompassed half of his overgorged belly. Kanen felt all eyes on him as he swaggered over to the counter slowly, holding his gut in both hands like a newborn as he tried not to burp loudly again.

Up at the counter, Kanen found Caleb waiting; a look of complete awe on his face as he gazed upon the young surfer's huge stomach.

"I believe I... *HIC* have a *BUUARRPP* meal to pay for..." Kanen chuckled, patting his belly proudly.

"Oh my God," Caleb gasped. "I can't believe you ate all that." Caleb began to grin from ear to ear. "That was incredible man... I've never seen someone pack away that much food!"

"Thank you *BWARP* Caleb..." Kanen laughed slowly. "I think I've *HIC* had my fill..." Kanen chuckled, his stomach wobbling slightly as he let out another burp, handing the young waiter his credit card, but Caleb shook his head.

"It’s on the house man." Caleb smiled. "You earned it."

***

Kanen lay sprawled out on the hood of his car as he watched the late afternoon sun dwindle on the horizon, the sky turning orange as the evening approached. The young stud had one arm behind his head, and the other wrapped around his gargantuan gut, releasing satisfied burps as he sighed contently. He felt so full... so fucking full... but so good too. The tightness, the weight, the size of his belly all felt incredible.

Kanen let out a long sigh as he brought his hand from his swollen belly down to hard manhood, stroking himself idly as he basked in the glow of his accomplishment. This had been quite possibly the most fun he'd ever had in his life. Eating so much food had left him completely exhausted and drained, his muscles ached and his mind was fuzzy from all the food he had forced into his system, but despite all that, Kanen wanted to see what other places did with order mix-ups.

This summer was going to be fun with people like Caleb around.

[buckysgrace]

Omg girl I beg of you please write more about big brother gator 😫🙏🏼

Ask and you shall receive lol

He would've been about 21-22ish I believe when the twins were born??

Probably was indifferent at the time but slowly grew into the idea of it

Honestly he was probably hoping for little brothers but quickly changed his mindset once he realized the girls played just as rough lol

He definitely had no idea how to hold a baby at first. Couldn't figure out why you needed to support their necks or why they were so fragile lol

Would hold them up until they started to cry, then back to Karen they went lol. He just always figured he was doing something wrong

Would absolutely give them pickles/lemons when they were babies because he thought their reactions were always funny

Now when they're starting to walk/talk and are really gaining their personalities; that's the stage he loved lol

Told them a ton of jokes at this age because they laughed at whatever he said

Absolutely calls them spoiled brats

Has definitely told them that there's a monster that lives on the ranch or somewhere under their bed/in their closet. Got in big trouble for that but honestly it was worth it in his opinion

Has also threatened to lock them up in the back of his cruiser and take them to jail when they've been rowdy

Gives out alllll the piggy back rides. And all the tickle fights

Will also take them to all of the fair rides. He rides every single one (lowkey gets sick by the end of it all tho lol)

Loves to bounce with them on the trampoline, definitely throws in a few flips in there to impress them

Obviously if they accidentally gets hurt he does the whole "don't tell dad"

The twins for sure draw pictures for him all the time <3 He has his own little collection of their art lol

If he has to watch them (Which is very very rare) he's pretty chill with them? Sort of lets them do their own thing because I think he's stern enough with them that they know not to get him in trouble (which is funny cuz I think he's the complete opposite with his own kids lol)

Will buy them a pop or sweets if Roy is too mean with them (continues to give them candy that's too sour tho, just to watch them react to it lol)

Probably purposely gives them candy to get them hyper actually, especially if Karen is being Karen.

He has drawn fake tattoos on them before

Probably also painted their faces. Probably made them think he was putting on pretty makeup or butterflies on their faces when in reality he ends up giving them a big mustache, or makes them look like a witch/skeleton lol

They definitely try and mess up his hair, rip his hats off or try and grab his vape. He's pretty good at swatting them away without getting angry

Will for sure pick them up from school in his uniform if he hears that other kids are being mean to them. He’s gotta get the intimidation points in smh

They probably accidentally ended up sneaking in while he was watching a horror movie and have tried to crawl into his bed before smh.

He absolutely has the most intense games of hide and seek with them (he will be crawling on top of the fridge or hiding in cabinets smh)

[sku11kidz]

Come, my child.

Fandom: Biohazard: Village, Resident Evil 8, Resident Evil: Village

Character Tags: Ethan Winters, Reader, Rosemary Winters (mention), Mother Miranda, Alicia Dimitrescu, Salvador Moreau, Karl Heisenberg,

Tags: Lord Ethan winters AU, Haha Ethan is an old 1950s dad, soft, Alternate canon, father is fathering, Child!Reader, children, horror tags, Ethan isn’t a good person, no matter how he wants to convince himself he is :(, reader is no older than 12, ???, writer is a teenager/slow updates

All is platonic in this fic.

Please do not tag as otherwise

The air is sharp and cold. It feels like you’ve been lost from the village for hours. Your parents told you not to go too far out into the village yet you did out of feeling curious and brave.

You were hungry and weak as the snow bit and ripped your body apart without even touching you. Despite this, your own ego prevented you from going back.

Blinded, you looked up to see a small home in the woods. The home has a simple and modest exterior, with a simple white paint job and a small front porch.

The windows were warm and inviting as the voice calls out to you. “Child. Dear child. Come here. Let me comfort you.” The voice called out. “Come home to me.” This voice was masculine and soft.

As you wake up, you feel the warmth of a cozy bed. The bedroom you’re in is soft and homey. The room is filled with various stuffed animals and kids toys. The thing was, who brought you in here?

You open the door and begin to creep downstairs. The bright walls of the hallway compliment the dark wooden floors. Small roses and carnations are painted the walls, it reminds you of a hospital in a way.

Whoever lived here really enjoyed plants. Specifically, roses and carnations. The base floor wasn’t much different. Same floral print as before, the walls were just green this time. This whole situation had you thinking.

Who brought you in? Was in the same person who spoke to you before? Just as you think this, you’re hit with the smell of mashed potatoes and roast chicken.

The aroma was intoxicating and mouth watering. You felt your own stomach growl, it had been a while since you had eaten. Last time you ate was when your mom sent you out to the forest this morning. By the look of the windows, it was after 8pm.

Beginning to think with your stomach, you follow the smell. As you get closer, you hear soft humming. It sounds like the song *Be Cruel/Hound Dog* by Elvis.

Coming closer, the smell gets stronger. You peek in the kitchen and see a tall man, Ethan. He hums softly and pulls the roast chicken out of the oven. It looked as tasty as it smelt. The chicken is a golden brown, covered in crispy skin and dripping with juices. A small hint of garlic and lemon can be seen along the lines of the chicken.

Just as you observe the chicken and get lost in the daydream of eating, you hear Ethan let out a small gasp of shock. You somehow startled him. He chuckles and puts the chicken down on the stove. “You’re awake.” He coos, bending down to your level. A bit scared, you back away. Ethan frowns and raises his hands. “Listen—! Listen,” he chuckles “I’m friendly, see?” Feeling his generosity, you slightly let your guard down.

Ethan sighs and smiled. “I was just about to wake you up. You’ve been sleep for hours and it’s almost dinner time, sweetheart.” He stands up and and picks the roast chicken up, placing it on the table. “Here, take a seat. Dinner will be ready soon.” He ruffles your hair while you sit at the table.

The dining room walls have small antique photos of Ethan and what looks like his wife and daughter. You can’t even register the whole picture before you’re distracted by the Mashed Potatoes, Biscuits, and cherry pie on the table.

Just as you observe the chicken and get lost in the daydream of eating, you hear Ethan let out a small gasp of shock. You somehow startled him. He chuckles and puts the chicken down on the stove. “You’re awake.” He coos, bending down to your level. A bit scared, you back away. Ethan frowns and raises his hands. “Listen—! Listen,” he chuckles, “I’m friendly, see?” Feeling his generosity, you slightly let your guard down.

Ethan sighs and smiles. “I was just about to wake you up. You’ve been sleeping for hours and it’s almost dinner time, sweetheart.” He stands up and picks the roast chicken up, placing it on the table. “Here, take a seat. Dinner will be ready soon.” He ruffles your hair while you sit at the table.

The dining room walls have small antique photos of Ethan and what looks like his wife and daughter. You can’t even register the whole picture before you’re distracted by the Mashed Potatoes, Biscuits, and cherry pie on the table. “Poor kid, you’re just skin and bones.” He begins to set his plate. “Come on now, dig in. A growing child like you needs your nutrition and what better nutrition than a home cooked meal?” He begins to eat.

One bite of the greens and you’re in heaven. They were seasoned and cooked to perfection. You completely devoured at least three plates and Ethan was glad to feed you. “It’s late you know,” his voice is calm and safe, “why don’t you stay here? It’s dangerous to leave at night.” You were about to object but you remembered just how unnerving the woods got in the winter. Reluctantly, you agree. Ethan looks more than glad. He smiles and gently holds your hand. “Where did you come from?” He asked. You explain how you came from the village and Ethan frowns. “That village? It’s dangerous over there. Mother Miranda isn’t the kind woman you think she is.” You didn’t understand what he was saying. Mother Miranda hasn’t done anything bad

…

Right?

Of course not. This old man was just out of it. Ethan sighs and gently lets go of your hand. “How about this? I’ll walk you back home to the village tomorrow. We can leave after breakfast. Sound good with you?” He asked as if you had a choice.

Later that evening, Ethan tucks you into bed. “There we go.” He whispers to himself, ruffling your hair. “If you need anything, you can cry out to me and I’ll be there as soon as possible.” Hearing this makes you feel warm. Your parents back at home never reassured you at times like this. Normally, they’d send you off to bed without a story or a kiss but this wasn’t the case. Ethan was better to you in his few hours of knowing you than your parents who knew you all your life. He looks down at you with his soft eyes, almost looking glum. “Goodnight, Rosema–” He cuts himself off. “Do you have a name or a nickname I can call you?” The name you choose to go by leaves your lips. “What a sweet name. I’m Lord Winters but I really just wish people would call me Ethan.” He chuckles and sighs. “Sleep well. I won’t let any monsters get you.” He stands up and turns off the lights, leaving the room for you to get some rest.

As you lay in bed, you can’t help but fully look around your surroundings. While Mr. Winters’ home was inviting, why was it welcome for you to sleep in? You couldn’t think too hard before your eyes got heavy. The cold pillows and soft blankets kiss you goodnight as you drift off to bed.

Hopefully, tomorrow will be a better day. You’ll see your mom and dad and they’ll welcome you with open arms.

[zagreuses-toast]

Playlist for Sybil my beloved. it was harder for me to find songs that match her character vibes (or at least my interpretation of her) from my library, which is where I harvest most of the songs for my playlists, so its a little shorter than the others. like Vime's playlist has Dad Music, this one has a fair amount of Mom energy (or at least MY mom's taste in music). explanations/categories for the songs under the cut

Sybil has that dragon centric autistic swag, and she refuses to conform to nonsense:

Whistling in the Dark by TMBG

Weird Science by Oingo Boingo

Life on Mars by David Bowie

Touch Tone Telephone by Lemon Demon

Walking My Gargoyle by the Gothic Archies (this is The Sybil song to me)

Human Behavior by Björk

Sam and Sybil songs (this time from sybil pov/themes, mainly about finding love late in life, devotion, and also a bit of loneliness, she has to share him with the city )

Take a Chance on Me by ABBA

Somebody to Love by Queen

Here is Home by Ryn Weaver

Home to Me by Devil and the Deep Blue Sea (this one!!! loving someone who is always somewhere else, being the thing they come back to no matter what)

Too Tall Girl by TMBG

Me and My Husband by Mitski

Butterfly's Repose by Zabwa

Uptown Girl by Billy Joel

Washing Machine Heart by Mitski

Pink in the Night by Mitski (mainly for the back line, I think about vimes saying Sybil said she could do knots and crosses on his back , a lot)

Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy by Queen (Sybil and her siege on Vimes's heart, which he caved to the minute he realized it was happening)

I Do I Do I Do by ABBA

Stuck In the Middle With You by Stealers Wheel (the clowns and jokers being the aristocracy)

Go Your Own Way by Fleetwood mac (reminds me of that guards guards bit with Sybil pointedly not staying at the door for Vimes' dramatic romance movie one last look over the shoulder moment, i love them so much your honor)

I Bet on Losing Dogs by Mitski (listen she has a TYPE)

Never Knew Love by TMBG

I think about that scene in Fifth Elephant where she is trapped and remembers what growing up as a large and kind girl is like, and then breaks out and kills a werewolf with an iron bar she ripped directly from the window. I think about it a normal amount:

You Cannot by Erin McKewon

It's Different for Girls by of Montreal

Smile! No One Cares How You Feel by The Gothic Archies

Not The Same by Sheldon Riley (also the autism feelings)

Misc:

Army of Me by Bjork

Bitch, Bitch, Bitch from Jekyll and Hyde

Ride of the Valkyries by Wagner (I had to)

[miidnighters]

get to know the mun.☺

what's your phone wallpaper: it's one of our wedding photos lmao

last song you listened to: weatherman by zach hood

currenly reading: I am actually not reading anything rn? I paused one of my poirot books halfway thru and I have an elsie silver book waiting but

last movie: I like. never watch movies anymore? like the answer is the eras tour movie but something with a plot? we don't know her

last show: I watched some leverage w my dad recently. rewatching criminal minds again. mostly we've been watching youtube

what are you wearing right now?: like, three layers of clothes and bedsocks and a balnket

how tall are you?: 5'4, apparently. 162.5 cm

piercings / tattoos?: I have 14 tattoos and 12 piercings (I used to have more rip my nose, tongue and nips but had to take them out for surgery). 6 of the piercings are in my earlobes tho so it's not actually that impressive

glasses / contacts: Iam supposed to wear glasses while I'm on the computer but....

last thing you ate?: I just ate a strawberry iced donut lmao

favourite colour: lemon/sunshine yellow!

current obsession: I'm about to watch bridgerton s3 so

do you have a crush right now?: I do and it's terminal (i'm married and it's on my husband)

favourite fictional character: I have always had THE softest spot for Anne Shirley, ever since I first read the books at like 8 or 9 years old

last place you travelled: I'm guessing my regular trips to the coast don't count so I think it would have been going north to Cairns to see my husband's family? we're going again this year for my younger brother-in-law's eighteenth

TAGGED BY: @whileurmine TAGGING: @sorrowsick | @epistrefei | @draconisa | @platiinums | @vitalphenomena

[alexluvsskittlez]

I haven't made an into in months so uhhh..

HI EVERYPONY!!! my name is Alex, you can also call me Sam, Zoe, or Binoo

I'm 14 years old, my birthday is April 23rd

i am an artist, animator, content creator, and I'm learning how to sing :3

I'm audhd and dyscalculic (idk if i spelled that right sorry)

my special interests are Paramore and my ocs

I am currently hyperfixated on Emily Armstrong

I am PARAMORE'S #1 FAN!!!!!!!

i am a PROUD SELFSHIPPER!!!!

BYI:

I am Emily Armstrong's #1 defender (sorry haters XD)

I have the worst sense of humor on this planet

I joke about rpf (real people fiction) sometimes. I don't actually support it. but at the same time idgaf if other people involve themselves in it just don't be too weird

I usually don't think before I post so if I post something wrong please let me know

idrgaf about proship discourse and it's not something that I like involving myself in. I generally don't care what people ship but I still think shipping illegal stuff is weird as hell

I get pissed really easily but I promise I'm nice

bands/artists i like (warning, its a LOT):

Paramore, pierce the veil, linkin park, mcr, Hayley Williams, pinkshift, meet me @ the altar, silverstien, fall out boy, green day, bring me the horizon, p!atd, la dispute, lemon demon, sunny day real estate, Will Wood and the tapeworms, Will Wood, asking Alexandria, not enough space, get scared, the used, Owl city, mitski, Florence + the machine, stomach book, she wants revenge, Weezer, picture me broken, rites of spring, halfnoise, isles & glaciers, dead by sunrise, black veil brides, system of a down, limp Bizkit, silly goose, dead sara, scary kids scaring kids, alesana, femtanyl, the cure, modern baseball, foxszn, 3drinkz, yellow card, vylet pony, american football, boygenius, Avril Lavigne, millionaires, Kesha, s3rl, 3oh!3, attack attack, brokencyde, and waterparks.

shows I like:

smiling friends, steven universe, gravity falls, murder drones, madoka magica, the owl house, amphibia, clone high, invader zim, eddsworld, spooky month, inside job, pelswick, tadc, toopy and binoo, mlp, and the ghost and molly mcgee.

movies i like:

the final riot, steven universe the movie, atsv, itsv, the fnaf movie, mean girls, juno, the tamagotchi movie (i think there's actually multiple but I'm specifically talking about the anime one made in 2007), toopy and binoo the movie, and mlp the movie

games i like:

splatoon 2, fnaf, minecraft, animal crossing, mario kart, castle cats, pjsekai, nintendogs, roblox, regretevator, cart ride into 17 pregnant hyenas (rip </3), baldis basics, and ddlc

youtubers i like:

Kurtis Conner, Danny Gonzalez, Drew Gooden, funkyfrogbait, bredrawz, flamingo, benoftheweek, sinjin drowning, cybernoop, dantdm, stariaat, lovely lor, juj, and penguinz0

musicals i like:

mean girls, be more chill and Hamilton (I'm still getting into musicals so if you have any recommendations please tell me!!)

titles I gave myself (probably not necessary but idgaf)

Paramore's #1 fan

Pim Pimling's spouse

professional Pim kisser

#1 tell me how listener

#1 misadventures fan

#1 Emily Armstrong defender

tamagotchi dad of 3

spinel and mars' parent

#1 laika's comet fan

#1 class of 09 the flipside hater

#1 mip hater

worst dancer in history

other stuff I like (some are fandom related some aren't):

alternative subcultures/fashion, laikas comet, homestuck, warrior cats, tamagotchis/digital pets in general, mid-late 2010s animation memes, old internet stuff, space stuff, and animals

dni:

basic dni stuff uhh, people who are 12 and under, people who harass proshippers (yeah they're weird but harassing them is no better than being one), Paramore haters, Emily Armstrong haters, and those 4chan femcel self proclaimed problematic mfs. other than that i just block freely.

other socials:

ig: alexluvsskittlez

youtube: alexluvsskittlez

sketchers united: alexluvsskittlez

newgrounds: alexluvsskittlez

deviantart: pixelisgay

spotify: Pimkisser69420👽🙏

ermm that's all BYEEE!!!

[csaw]

Meet the weird cousin no one talks about at the family reunion:

Vigore! (in my head it's pronounced like Igor) (He's my OC/Sona for oxy's dunmeshi modern au)

Vampire freak, he likes getting in everyone's pants. and he's very open about it, don't sleep with him if you can't handle everyone he knows finding out lmfao

Random things about him under the cut:

He is 5'8, not very tall...

He doesn't know what romantic love is, so.. he calls everything that isn't sexual love platonic (guess who's projecting!)

He has a friend group (aside from his coworkers) and he makes out with all of them otl and has been in bed with all of them at least once... but they're just friends. Friends that have sex with each other but still, friends.

I think u could put him under the polyam umbrella, but he genuinely doesn't know what the difference between romantic and platonic love is so ... he's really confusing. He'll take u out on a few dates and introduce you to his friend group and even his family and then finally you guys have sex and then u have to ask... What are we ? 🥺😿 And he'll say smth like "we're besties :3 ur like a brother/sister/sibling to me... I love you so much." BRO YOU STUCK UR DICK IN ME WDYM IM LIKE A SIBLING TO YOU?!?!?! and then he makes out with you again- rinse + repeat. endless cycle until you cut him off or try to explain u want him romantically. Then he's like. Okay? What does that mean??

He's a vampire, I would say he's pure-blooded but he's also super young for an immortal, he's like. 27 ish. And he still works in a shitty min wage job. Plus a secret hobby that he uses to make side cash..

His mom is 200+ years old and his dad is like in his 180's. But they both look like they're in their late 30's or very early 40's

His favorite drink is O- low sugar blood with lemon and cucumber.. he likes it hot, he hates drinking cold blood (most vampires do tbh)

He got high once in highschool with his friends and ended up having a psychotic episode, so. He doesn't take drugs other than his prescription anti-psychotics now!! and his sleep meds. nocturnalism be damned...

He visited Chilchuck's store ONCE with his dad and the only reason he keeps coming back is to hit on Chil. Chil hates (?) this, Vi buys absolutely nothing and just follows him around pretending to be interested until he can try his luck again. His dad and chil are acquaintances with each other (divorced fathers get along) but .. fucking... Vi is sabotaging that relationship just by being a nuisance. He wants that hot halfling dilf to pound him out of frustration. Chilchuck hasn't asked him to stop yet... So Vi takes that as a sign that he can keep showing up! He's waiting for Chilchuck to break so he can get that hate sex he's been dreaming about since he met the guy

He acts pretty normal at work, and tries to keep a decent relationship with his coworkers (Laios + Kabru)

He is thirsting after Namari, she goes to the store he works at for groceries and.. he gets heart palpitations when she talks to him. Luckily his blood is rotten bc he's dead, so he doesn't blush! But if he was alive, you know his pasty ass would be bright fucking red. Namari is the only person he gets this nervous speaking to, tbh. He's usually really chill, or unabashedly freaky on main. This is the only time he considers thinking of a definition for romantic love, because. It feels different from platonic love. (Or what he calls platonic love at least) It's also very much a sexual attraction thing, but! There's something more?!

He's vers btw, and he low-key wants to fuck Kabru ... He has a thing for pretty twinks and dirty butches, sigh.

He wears open flannels, low cut tank tops, sometimes a band or graphic tee, and ripped jeans. He owns 2 sneaker pairs, one of the pairs is one size too big and the other is half a size too small, and then he has his combat boots that r actually the correct size but take too long to put on so he only wears them occasionally. He also wears crosses out of spite since he's a vampire and the world's biggest sinner.

He has a blade tattoo bc he thinks blade is hot and he had a crush on Deacon Frost from the first movie. He's so fucking gay oh my god

He has way too many accessories. And clothes in general tbh. But he's prepared for any occasion....

He has the vibes and personality of a stoner but bro doesn't even drink alcohol. He's too scared to do anything like that. Poser tbh

Hrmmm... Ask me questions about him idk

Oh he doesn't sweat and he wears mostly full body clothing in the day time, just to keep the sun away. Yes he gets crispy in the sun... Not a metaphor he starts to burn up and his skin turns to ashes. Vampire business.

He doesn't like telling people that he's a vampire bc of stigma around it, but he doesn't try to hide it either? It's something most people figure out pretty early on without him having to explain it lol. Also he doesn't like being sexualized bc of his vampirism, he wants you to sexualize him because he's a stinky hairy freak that likes getting pegged by older women. Not because of some stereotype u made up in ur head about him.

That's all I know for now...

[spaceboibrainrot]

ETF my favorite movie

12 year old lemon demon fan and sexless space bug have Daddy issues for 40 minutes, bug uses capitalism against the public using children to move the earth to be bombed, Minecraft jail, hot dad and lemon demon fan fight space bug for a moose, horrifying rip in space time, lemon demon fan has 2 dads now and they love him while space bug lost 2 dads and is sad and wants affection.