#// it's hypocritical to want to lighten her load when he can hardly handle his own but that's how much he's beginning to care about her

[nyt1ba]

     He expects her to vanish at any given opportunity,   she seemed ready to depart ever since he had known her,   a look in her eyes that held a secret he could wordlessly understand,   she didn't belong here and she fears the hurt that would come if she allows herself to find her place,   she's ready to run,   to avoid the pain before it can settle into her bones.   A part of him still wishes he could find an escape like her,   to forget everything for even a moment   &.   delude himself with the safety of a new world so far away from his own.   But he loved earth,   in all its disarray,   he loved it.   It had lost all meaning of home to him when the war robbed him of everything he had ever loved,   and yet,   he still labors to save it from the ashes,   he clings to life with an absurd hope when it was slipping right through his fingers like falling sand.   If his endless quest in salvation fails when all life is finally snuffed out of existence then he can at least fade along with it knowing he had done everything he could.   The strain between them caused by his elaborate lies was on the mend,   but Adam still feels that divide that sits between them,   there was always a line neither had dared to cross,   an uncertainty that made trust so difficult to give.   Still,   it was more to him than it was with anyone else,   a sort of freedom he had been denied when he had to renounce his own emotions and any sense of self to live for others,   if this is how it's meant to be,   then he's content to have remembered some parts of himself at the very least.        ❛❛   I know.   i won't stop you, the choice is yours in the end.   You can have my drone too if need be,   i'd be happy to help in any way I can.   ❜❜        though his voice doesn't communicate the sentiment correctly,   he means what he said,   her cause wasn't anything to concern himself with but he would like to lessen her load even for a little bit.

  Unlike her,   he's bound to earth not for sentiment alone,   it was his many burdens that kept him so rooted to earth,   a wish to protect what's left and what will come to be                     an ironic part for him to play when he had been the one responsible for all that had happened.   However,   guilt gives him further reason to take responsibility,   to right his many wrongs in relentless self punishment.   The people of Xion,   the Naytibas,   their continuity was hanging by a thin thread he had to keep intact with both hands,   for if he let go for one moment all would be lost.   It's exhausting,   he knows it,   he feels it,   a deep ache between shoulders,   crushing at him ever so slowly.   He never utters a word despite the days when his body is screaming for it,   it was his penance,   the price he must pay in order to find healing.   The scavenger allows himself the luxury of a sigh,   a weariness within dark hues as they drifted to look elsewhere.        ❛❛   I hope you never have to.   ❜❜        at first it was unbearable,   a torment he could not withstand,   now this endless toil had become his way of living,   [   if it can ever be called as such.   ]   He wouldn't wish that upon her,   while she had been similarly ruined,   there was much of her she didn't know still existed,   a goodness in her he wants to keep safe even if she doesn't want him to.

  Rolling onto his back again,   his empty gaze doesn't find solace within the stars despite how much he had tried,   he understands their meaning to her,   how special it must be to be able to bask in their gentle light that gave a safety similar to her home,   their glow is faint to him,   slowly dying the more he looks onto it,   when did life become so pale in his eyes ?   They come to a close,   favouring the familiarity of his own darkness instead.   Her little jab had stung at him once before but now it only brings out a huff   &.   a smile.        ❛❛   Its nice,   if you have something soft to land on.   ❜❜        he remarks,   a hand raising to rub at his temple in recollection of the headache he felt afterwards,   he never means for it to happen,   but always finds better things to do than to rest even for a few minutes.        ❛❛   I want earth to heal,   I want us all to heal.   That's my purpose,   my only goal.   It's why I keep going when everything seems   ...   hopeless.   ❜❜        it's a forlorn admission that slips past his lips,   aware of its impossibility but not willing to give up,   he can't afford to.        ❛❛   As for you,   I suppose that's for you to find out,   though, I hope you remember that you no longer have to do it alone.   ❜❜

Death is her truest wish — still held like a secret within her heart, unaffected by the shuffling of her priorities. While more reluctant than ever before, what she feels for him isn’t strong enough to keep her here forever — but it is strong enough to draw her back to his side time and time again. It is a strange sort of peace she feels with Adam, but at the same time there is an unmistakable fear lingering there as well. There comes a point in time where she generally cuts ties completely — leaves before she can be left. Her intention was to let the chips fall where they may, but talking to him feels so easy … a natural simplicity to it that defies all her usual instincts. Before she can even think twice, she’s already talking about staying.  Teeth press into the flesh of her cheek – but is staying really the best idea? Hand curls into the exposed side of her skull, fingers sweeping back ashen bangs as she responds,      “ I’ll consider it. Earth may not be the most hospitable planet, but … it’s free of Coalition control. That makes it much less – exhausting for me to be here. ”     The alternative is watching her back pretty much everywhere she goes – the added pressure of keeping herself free of injury is more taxing than she lets on and she finds herself more and more drained.     “ But ... I still have some things I need to take care of. ”

Revenants still wander empty battlefields, run amok within ruined cities, and rampage against the forces of the Sovereign Union – who try endlessly to recruit her to their cause. But Elektra’s days as a military leader are over, she can barely stomach recalling them – even the good memories leave her sickened. When all is said and done with the Revenants and the Coalition, there’s always bounty hunters seeking her head or former allies looking to stab her in the back to make a quick fortune. Not to mention the notable members of the Cult of the Falling Star whom she also hunts as often as she can. It seems that every direction she turns bears a new knife just waiting to flay her skin – with the exception of Adam, of Earth itself. While she never complains, does the work without a second thought … it is difficult to be denounced as nothing more than a traitor and a villain. Hard to exist in a galaxy full of people who would rather watch her bleed out than help her in any way shape or form – but she does it wordlessly, endlessly, days stretching now into oblivion.     “ Life just seems – never-ending knowing what I do now, ”     a sigh and the revenant rolls onto her back, wincing at the chill as the rockface presses up against her joints,     “ I don’t know how you do it.  ”

Elektra has never been stupid, she seeks death because it is a release – a way out of a life that does not want her. This galaxy is decidedly against her; living is akin to the feeling of being trapped inside a room with no windows, no doors. No way out. Nothing to do but surrender to the crushing pressure of it all, and yet – being here lessens the weight in a way she does not yet understand … which is why she’s not entirely ready to give up on Adam, Earth, or the concept of life itself.     “ Maybe you could give me a few pointers – although you don’t seem to be much better at it than I am, ”     a laugh, fingers settling upon her midsection, absentmindedly running along the scar that separates her synthetic skin from it’s genuine counterpart,     “ although … a week long coma does sound pretty nice sometimes. ”