#// it feels like I'm missing a lot of triggers so please let me know !

[hamiltonells]

ALWAYS ~ JUDE BELLINGHAM

[sort of based of this request! so thank you for request. please let me know what you think! always welcome to criticism, also let me know if you would like a series based or this little family! 🍓]

[SUMMARY: being soon to be parents is hard especially being so young as well, but Jude and y/n takes everything in their stride]

[WARNINGS: fluff, smut, morning sickness? not edited, swearing spelling mistakes? ]

You’re feet shuffled across the cold kitchen flooring as you soothed your bump with one hand and held a tub of Ben and Jerry's ice cream in the other, Your seven -month bump slightly peaking out of Jude’s shirt.

“Are you still okay for tomorrow, beautiful?” Jude’s voice reaches out over the FaceTime call, as you sitback down on the sofa and put the blanket over your bump.

With Jude being in Madrid, it was decided that you would have dinner at his parents' house in England. Due to your frequent travels between England and Madrid, you rarely have the opportunity to spend time with his family, especially with his mother being in the middle.

you placed the laptop on your lap during the ongoing FaceTime call with Jude, “Yeah all good jude, what time is your flight back” your voice grew tired with every sentence you speak.

“flight is about four in the morning will get back home at seven”Jude's voice making you grow even more tired and relaxed.

You knew it was difficult for Jude to balance being at the top of the football world and being a father at just twenty years of age, but he never complained about it once

It was unexpected for you to become pregnant, and it came as a surprise since you are only nineteen and Jude is twenty years old, but you both took it as your little blessing.

"Is my little one okay? It seems like she's wearing Mommy out" Jude's voice echoes through the FaceTime call, "we're okay, just tired and the usual sickness," your voice tiredly drawls out.

Since discovering you were pregnant, you have been experiencing severe nausea, even if it was morning or night It felt like a constant battle to keep any food down, and the smell of certain foods would instantly trigger your gag reflex.

"Plus, we miss daddy a lot," you said "fuck,don't do that voice, it turns me on" he added with a rough accent, you tutted “better hurry up home then”

"I'll be back home shortly, my Love," he said in his gentle Birmingham accent.

you was sound asleep when you heard the keys jingle in the door, the door open and Jude's footsteps slowly and carefully plodding up the stairs.

You hear Jude carefully open the door to the bedroom where you both share. As you shuffle yourself up to sit against the headboard, you reach for the switch to switch on the lamp, and you switch it on.

"What are you doing awake?" Jude's tired voice broke the silence of the room. You turned to see him rubbing his eyes, looking disheveled and exhausted.

"I missed you, heard you trying to be quiet" you admitted "I'm sorry, I just didn't want to disturb you" he replied, a sheepish smile on his face.

"You could never disturb me. I always want to hear your voice." you said softly, Moving to swing your legs out of bed holding your pregnant belly as you trying to ignore the persistent pressure on your bladder.

You sigh, knowing you have to get out of bed to relieve yourself.

“oi what you doing, let me help” Jude’s voice fills your ears, as he rushes to be by your side, you feel a pair of strong arms wrap around you, supporting your weight.

As he presses a soft kiss to your head, Your loving Jude gently helps you out of bed and guides you to the bathroom, making sure you don't trip over your own feet.

Once you’ve emptied your bladder, you get back into bed with a kiss on the cheek from Jude.

You snuggle into the bed sheets, Jude’s bare back now facing you as he’s rambling on about something with his toothbrush in his mouth, you don’t realise your eyes have started to close until you feel the bed dip beside you.

“Sorry baby, didn't mean to wake you again” Jude whispered as he pulled the duvet over the pair of you, with your back facing Jude he slides his arms around you and on to your bump.

"I love you and we both missed you," you murmur softly in response to him, you feel him snuggle into your neck as he presses a soft kiss there.

“hey Jobe”you slightly laugh out his name as he opens the door only to be thrown into a headlock by his own brother, the pair of them shuffling into the living room as they play fight with each other.

You shut the front door and clean your feet on the doormat before untying your shoelaces and removing your shoes.

You enter the living room and see the two brothers sitting on the sofa with a sour expression and Denise giving them a look.

"Y/n, lovely seeing you again” Denise greets you warmly as she glances up and sees you standing in the doorway “you look amazing, not long left now” she hugs you as you smile and look down, “thank you Denise” you gushed as you sat in between Jude and Jobe.

“only a couple more months left, did Jude show you the scan pictures” you continued.

"Yeah, he did," she replied with a smile. "They're amazing, aren't they? I can't believe how much the baby has grown already."

"I know, it's incredible," you said, excitement evident in your voice. "I can't wait to meet him or her."

"As long as they don't look like Jude, they will be alright" Jobe joked “You’re literally like a mini Jude, Jobe” You laughed as you put your hand onto Jude’s thigh.

“It's nice to know that I can actually grow a beard at the moment" Jude mumbles to himself, but loud enough so that Jobe can hear, "you call that a beard" Jobe laughs as he’s dodging Jude's kick.

As Denise calls all of you over for dinner, Jude gets up first to assist you up, putting one hand on your back as he guides you over to the dinner table, he sits next to you his hand on your thigh.

Mark, Jude’s dad is sat across from you, making slight conversation as you start eating your food.

As you took another bite of your food, your stomach churned you felt a wave of nausea wash over you, you reach out to take a sip of your water to hopefully wash it down.

But as the night went on, the feeling only got worse, your hand went straight over your mouth mumbling your apologies as you rush through the house to get to the bathroom.

He trails behind you, apologizing to his family before heading to the bathroom to assist you, gently rubbing circles on your back as you lean over the toilet, feeling him gather your hair up in his hands.

“you okay baby?” His voice soothing you, you lean back into him breathless as the embarrassment washes over you.

”Jude, I am deeply embarrassed. Your mother and your entire family are under the impression that I became sick because of the meal she cooked.“You convey your concern by covering your face with your hands.

“she doesn’t think that, don’t be stupid they know your struggling with your pregnancy” Jude tries to calm your down by wrapping his arms around your shoulders as you both sit in the bathroom floor.

“You okay y/n?” Denise’s worried voice makes you look up, as you see her standing in the doorway “she’s okay mum, bit tired though I think” Jude answers for you as he puts a strand of hair behind your ear.

"I'll set up Jude's room for you both, and maybe it'll be best if you stay overnight, I'll bring some lemonade up to help it helped my morning sickness with Jobe" Denise smiles at you .

In a pair of shorts and an old shirt, you lay on the bed of Jude's old bedroom, covered in the familiar smell of his old clothes.

Jude is right next to you, scrolling through his phone on his lap with his hand on your inner thigh as he softly squeezes it, as he as he speaks with Jobe who is laying across the end of the bed, who is also scrolling on his phone.

"How much longer do you have left?" Jobe asks quietly as you open your eyes to his voice. "Just a little over a month, why are you excited, Uncle Jobe?" you playfully respond.

he just hums to your question, focusing back on whatever was on his phone.

The next thing you notice is Jude placing his phone on his bedside table, and then shuffles over and settles his head on your chest while his hands go straight to shirt to lift it up, his hands go to your bump to soothe it.

In your hands, you are gentle touching the ends of his hair gently twisting it and reaching to his scruffy beard gently scratching it as he hums softly to.

When he presses a soft kiss against your bump, your unborn baby gives him a small kick as they responds to his kisses

“Did you feel that?” Jude’s face snaps around to face you as he realizes what has happened “yeah, going to be like there daddy” you smile as you stroke his cheek.

“what? let me feel, move Jude” Jobe says as he rushes to your side and he places his own hand on your bump he pushes Jude's hands away as he presses his own against the bump.

“Jobe, fucking hell it's my kid.” Jude leans down for a for a kiss before getting up and making his way to the bathroom. You giggle as you see Jude's scrunched up face as he gets up and goes to the bathroom.

you’ve just gotten into bed when Jude come in with a glass of water and places it on your bedside table, “mum says goodnight” you hum to answer him while tugging him down to yourself.

"Careful," he laughs as he catches himself on his hands as he's above you, your hands go around his neck as you press a kiss to his lips.

His laughter fades into a soft sigh as he leans in for another kiss, his lips meeting yours once more before he puts his face into your neck and presses a few light kisses.

“You have a good day, baby?” He mumbles into the crook of your neck “the best thank j” you the nickname you call him slides off your tongue easily.

Jude hums“I love you so bloody much”

“I love you more” you giggle even more when be nips your neck.

He seals your lips together once more, using his knees to spread your thighs a bit further apart for him as he spreads them apart.

In the midst of your kiss, he lets out a breathy moan, courtesy of the fingers which are holding his face, interrupting your kiss with a breathy moan.

Jude utilizes the chance to break away and snag a pillow from his side of the bed, urging your hips up by tapping the fluffy thing against your side.

your lift your back up, and he settles it under your lower back and bum to prop you up. Fortunately for him, he has had extensive experience navigating the challenges of your pregnant belly.

he grips your shorts and carefully pulls them off, taking your knickers off and softly pressing a kiss to your thigh in the progress.

Settling between your thighs, Jude giggles when you wraps your legs around his hips and tugs him closer.

Jude’s body hovers over yours , love-sick smiles a breath away from meeting each other, and he drags his fingers through your folds, groaning at how slick you’ve become.

“Oh fuck” you whisper into Jude’s ear, biting back a grin as Jude grips his cock with the fingers that had previously been fondling you.

Jude smiles as their chests are pressed together, enjoying the feeling of their stomachs touching while he guides himself into your slit.

Jude hums appreciatively, eyes fluttering shut as he basks in how warm and gooey you are for him. He'd almost forgotten how it felt to have you this desperate for him and his touch.

“Need to be quiet, Jobe next door” he whispered as a moan ripped though your body.

"Oh it's so good darling," he mumbles to you, dropping his head into the crook of your neck. He made a gentle backward slip, pulling the hips back gently as he slipped forward again, his breath stuttering as he dutifully slipped forward once again.

Guiding him, you softly release a moan, lowering one hand to the lower part of his back. With a whisper that tickles his ear, you affirm, "Jude, So so good." Tickled by the sensation, he squirms slightly and responds with a small laugh.

Jude soft with his movements, cautious of the baby between yourself, "made for being wrapped me huh?" And jude thinks nothing ever been truer.

Your arms were made to hold him, youe hands were made for pulling him closer and closer, and your heart was made to completely consume his.

you reached your high before him, rolling your hips up to try and bring him to the edge, grinding down into your heat as his cock twitches and buries deep in your walls.

Jude knows you’re watching his eyes scrunch shut and his gaping mouth curl into a breathy laugh as he comes “sorry baby, too tired for another one” he breathes into your neck.

As you nod and brush the sweaty spots from his forehead to soothe him and just like that, he is already able to feel lighter. He never has to sorry with you, you’ll always be here for him.

[monarchberrysblog]

𝔡𝔬𝔫’𝔱 𝔭𝔲𝔰𝔥 𝔦𝔱

+18 Miguel O’Hara x Fem!Reader

Summary: I fantasize about it all the time; if you were mine, I’d give this pussy to you nine to five by tonight.

You never wanted to go to work; you just wanted to get to work. After Miguel gets a haircut and gets something new, you decide to test it to see if you can still get a good grip.

Trigger Warnings ⚠️: switch!Miguel (duh), a bit of praise (from Miguel), size kink, cunnilingus (f! receiving), humping, Miguel breaks a couch 😏, breeding kink towards the end, unprotected p in v sex, and wrap it before you tap it. (OOC MIGUEL) if I missed any, let me know!

Word Count: +1.6k words

Author’s Note: Hi, hi, hi! I am somewhat notoriously bad at writing smut, but here we are! I want to improve on it and give you all a well-cooked meal, which is switch! Miguel. (I think the man is a submissive; this is my headcanon that I believe in.)

To my girlies who love submissive men who have the prettiest moans and groans 💌

Miguel didn't want to admit it but damn it, he loves it when you ride him. The way your legs trembled, the way you slammed your weight down into him, feeling his bulbous tip getting bullied into your cervix. The man loved it when you took control.

He loves it when he holds you; you are light, but the moment you're on top? The man caves in and begs for more.

This unlocked something in him by simply trying something new on a lazy, rainy Thursday evening…

“The barber did well with your hair…” You ran your fingers through his hair, feeling how soft it was under the pads of your fingers. “Why the taper fade?” You adjusted yourself on the couch where the two of you cuddled and shared a blanket. “It just became a nuisance to deal with after a while. So why not? Something new.”

As you spoke, you could feel a sense of longing. "Imma miss it; I'm not gonna have any leverage to grab when you're eating me—" You expressed, but suddenly stopped when you realized he was staring at you intensely. You could feel his gaze piercing your soul, focusing mainly on your eyes. Feeling embarrassed, you cleared your throat awkwardly and shifted your attention to the TV, which was playing softly in the background. “Sorry.”

Miguel shrugged nonchalantly and focused on the dramatic telenovela on the TV screen. "You never really were the type to grab onto my hair," he admitted. "You always seemed to prefer grabbing onto a pillow, or sometimes a blanket, maybe even your shirt, but that's about it." You lifted your head from his chest, surprised at how observant he was. "How on earth do you know that?" you asked incredulously, a tone that sounded forced. "I just do," he replied confidently. "I can tell you that you tend to whine a lot before you finish."

“Please, I don't whine when I come.” You scoffed before you covered yourself with the soft blanket you two shared.

“Yeah, you do, cariño.”

“Don't push it.”

/

You rolled your eyes back in ecstasy, feeling the wet muscle against your entrance, lightly giving it kitten licks, making it a point to flick at your clit. The man lapped at your juices and slurped up the clear arousal like it was the final meal of his life. Your hands grasp onto his hair, grinding your clit against his nose, moving your hips down towards the top of his nose.

“You're so cute, even with that little clit waiting to get suckled on…” You felt him grab your hips, and his thumb ghosted against the bundle of nerves, immediately feeling something slip out of your entrance. He pulled away from your warm and wet entrance and slipped his ring finger in, feeling your gummy walls flutter at the sensation.

“There you go, you're doing perfect. Take deep breaths.” He hummed, slowly pumping his fingers in and out of you.

“Spit on it…” You demanded, squirming your hips. “Not just yet, cariño.” He shushed you, pulling his fingers out and licking the clear arousal off. His tongue lightly probed at your fluttering hole a bit and slowly pulled away. The way your walls contracted, begging to be filled with his length, was enough for the man wanting to cave in.

“We’re going to do something different, cariño.” He breathed to you before he managed to toss you around on the couch, eventually with you on top and him below you. “Come on, put yourself to work.” He demands, feeling your soft, wet pussy against his aching cock.

Reaching down, your hand finally found his length, and you felt yourself playing with it more than anything. You tapped the tip against your entrance, excited to sink into his girth. “No, no, I don't think you understand. I don't want it to be inside just yet.” He pauses for a moment before he moved his hips away from your needy, wet entrance.

“I want you to grind on it.” He breathes out.

You hesitate before you let his cock go, allowing his length to land against his happy trail and lower stomach. Adjusting yourself and placing your hands on his shoulders, you slowly moved your aching core up and down his cock, feeling your clit get the right amount of friction. A quiet moan escapes your lips while the veins down his cock rub against the pearl of nerves. “There you go, cariño…” Miguel groaned out, feeling your arousal coat against his aching length.

“Put your whole weight down; none of this squatting bullcrap.” He grabs you by the hips and pushes you down; you feel his dick in between your folds, causing a gasp to escape. Before even having the time to get yourself comfortable, the hold he had on your waist while he moved you up and down against his length felt as if you were withering under his control. A familiar, warm, tight sensation builds up in your lower stomach before you erupt out a loud, whimpering moan.

“Does that feel good? Do you like that?” He heaves, still guiding you closer and closer to your orgasm. The way you trembled and made a whimpering sound was an indicator for Miguel. “All you gotta do is feel good for me, understand?” You nod, dumbed down by the arousal. The tension was almost palpable and thin, like a threading needle waiting to be snipped off by the sisters of faith with their sharp scissors.

“Aww, you can't speak? Is my girl getting dumbed down by grinding herself on my cock? Qué sucia. Dímelo, ya lo quieres?” His words sounded like venom—sweet but intoxicating venom escaping from his tongue and lips. The only response from you was a moan while you moved your hips after Miguel seized his movements. “¿Lo quieres?” He groans out, feeling his cock lubricated by your arousal.

“¿Quién te hace sentir bien? Dímelo fuerte, cariño. Quién.” He seizes your movements, not letting you reach your first high for the night. “You…” You breathed out. “Fuck, damn right you are…” Your fingernails dug into his shoulders, creating little crescent indents on his skin, but the man didn't care.

Slowly, Miguel sat up from where he lay down and decided to help his girl. “Here…” His hand reached down to his length, with his fingers holding onto the base of his cock. “Spit on it.” You demanded once again. “Eager, aren't we?” He mused before he spat down, and you felt it land on your clit, causing him to rub his thumb against it slowly, allowing your clit to be doused in his spit.

“C’mon, ride me. Ride me the way I like it.” You felt him tap his now-doused tip against your entrance before you grind yourself into his length, earning a moan for the both of you. “Jesus, your so fucking tight and small.” He groaned out. “Are you trying to make me come—” You felt your knees immediately regret the position, knowing that you're going to be the one to do a lot of cardio for this overstimulated man.

While bouncing on his cock, you felt his grip on your hips tighten, almost as if you were going to slip away from him. “There you go…” Miguel heaves out, soon pulling you into an embrace. “Let me fuck it in you, stay still…” He breathes before you slow your movements down to a halt.

The sound of skin slapping and your loud moans crescendo filled the living room space while being held onto a tight embrace and feeling his cock pumping inside you. Your whimpering cries became more noticeable as your cries went in sync with his harsh thrust. “More…” You whined out, feeling your fingernails dig into his skin; the fast-paced thrusts soon turned sloppy, with his cock sliding out of you every once in a while. “You're killing me, neña…” Miguel groans quietly, keeping up with the rapid, uneven pace, creating a wet, slapping noise.

“C’mon, let's finish together, make me proud.” Tears began to form, and some rolled down your cheeks while you kept up with the overstimulation and with how his tip aggressively bullied at your cervix. “More…” You demanded, moving in sync with his harsh thrusts.

As you were getting your guts rearranged on the couch by Miguel, you couldn't help but notice the creaking sounds coming from underneath the both of you. It seemed to be getting louder by the minute as if the old piece of furniture couldn't bear the weight of two people anymore. Just then, a sharp crack echoed through the room, causing you to jolt and lose your balance. Miguel, however, seemed unfazed by the noise and rolled his eyes as if he was used to it. He continued to keep up with the rapid movements, brushing his happy trail against your lower stomach. “I'll get a new couch soon…” You wanted to laugh at how nonchalant he was being bit the only sounds you can produce is a loud, needy moan instead.

The sounds of whimpers, moans, and cries were palpable; knowing that the two of you would get a noise complaint from neighbors, you didn't care. “Yes! Yes!” You squealed, feeling your climax slowly building up. Clear liquid gushes out, while a loud moan is the last sound you can produce deep into your chest. “Please let me breed you, fuck, I'm gonna breed you, cariño.” He pants to you, thrusting his cock into you, earning another orgasm from you and a splash zone on the already collapsed couch. “You feel so good…”

The way you felt him twitch inside you, along with his rapid rhythm slowly coming to an end. The pullout was swift, with some of Miguel’s remnants seeping out of your fluttering hole. “Good girl…” He rubbed his hand on your hip lovingly, seeing his semen oozing out and onto the fabric of the couch. A kiss to your lips brought you back to your senses as you happily returned the kiss and calmed down from your high.

“The couch…”

“I needed a new one anyways.”

[ursuu-la]

I've loved your Spencer one shots!

f you're still doing requests I'd love a good hurt/comfort with Spencer x fem!reader . Maybe the reader (maybe she's in the bau or something) is kidnapped or in danger in some way and Spencer/the team save her. Along with some good comfort after.

If not that's okay too!

Safe again - S. Reid.

tw: being kidnapped, being forced to eat, nightmares ig, having wounds.

wc: 2.6k

a/n: well, that took longer that expected. I hope you like it♡ btw let me know if there are any other triggers that I didn't point out!! Thanks♡♡

(requests are open.)

─── ⋆⋅���⋅⋆ ───

The roof was filled with mold, the floor felt cold, and your back hurt like hell. In fact, your whole body hurt like hell, especially your face due to all the torture your kidnapper had put on you. You knew the team would come to save you from this nightmare, but your hopes decreased every minute that passed by.

You saw her shadow appearing when the door opened, 'Not again...' You thought. She walked down the basement stairs and got closer to you. There was a plate on her hand, and it had some rice in it, like it always did.

"I hope you're hungry, I made this specially for you." You heard the woman's voice, and as she spoke, you could already feel your stomach wanting to throw up. Everything related to her caused you nausea.

"I... I'll eat it later..." You spoke, trying to avoid the food, but your words only made your kidnapper annoyed.

"You have to eat!" She cleared her throat. "I mean, darling, you'll get sick if you don't eat... please. Do it for me..." You tried to look away, avoiding her presence, but she grabbed your face and locked eyes with you. You felt her cold hands on your chin as you saw her grab some rice with the rusty spoon she had brought, the spoon was getting closer to your mouth, and a tear of desperation rolled down your face when you realized you had no choice.

"Please..." You lifted your gaze and looked at the kidnapper, begging for some compassion.

Spencer was pouring coffee in his cup, when a hand was placed on his shoulder.

"Shut up and eat!" She forced the spoon inside your mouth and watched as you ate. You felt a metal-like taste in your mouth, but you couldn't tell if it was the rusty spoon or the blood coming out of all the wounds you had in your face, that once again started to bleed.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

"Hey. Do you wanna talk?" Garcia was standing next to him, her hand reassuring Reid's shoulder. "It's like your fourteenth cup of coffee today. That's a lot. Even for you." She tried to joke, but she knew that Spencer wouldn't laugh at all.

"Thanks, but I'm fine." Reid placed the cup back on the counter and left it there, the fact that his behavior had been pointed out made him a little embarrassed.

"It's okay not to be... and you can't be fine. Not with what is going on, Spence." Penelope watched how her friend just looked down at the floor and remained in silence. For a second, it looked as if he was about to speak, but then Reid just silenced himself and turned away from Garcia. "Look, (y/n) has been kidnapped, and we're all doing everything in our hands to save her. You're one of the, if not the, most intelligent agent we have, and (y/n) needs your full concentration in the case in order to be saved." She was now speaking in a calmer tone as a hand rested in Spencer's shoulder. "I know it's hard... But you can always vent with me and with everyone else in the team."

For a moment, Spencer was still giving his back to Penelope, but then he turned to face her, and his eyes were teary. It broke Garcia's heart to see her friend like this, but she knew that now that he allowed himself to be worried openly, things would go smoother in the case.

"I just miss her so much..." Reid's voice was barely audible, but what could be heard was filled with sadness.

Hotch was a couple of steps away from the two of them. He couldn't hear what they were speaking about, but he knew it was about (y/n). He had a case file in his hands, new information had arrived from the local police station, and he knew that it was going to be a game changer. Aaron had told the rest of the team to go to the conference room, and now he had to speak to Spencer and Penelope.

"Guys." His voice sounded warmer than usual, a colleague's disappearance made the way he acted different. "I need you in the conference room and in your office now, please. It's about (y/n)." He spoke, first to Spencer and then to Penelope. The both of them nodded, understanding that it was important.

The case file said that a man had reported seeing a woman that looked like the unsub in his neighborhood, entering an abandoned house that was for sale. She had done it repeated times, and she always brought a different car, as if she didn't want to be recognized.

Spencer couldn't believe the information. He had an address in front of him, a place where you could possibly be. His heart was racing at full speed, and his hands were sweating. The bare thought of finding the woman that had taken you felt like a step closer to you. Reid hadn't said a word in the whole conference, but when Hotch said that Spencer wouldn't be entering the house, he couldn't help to yell.

"What?! But- I have to be there! I need to help her!"

"Yes. (y/n) needs you, and that's why we can't risk you getting close to the unsub. In case you can't control yourself and attack her, we don't wanna cause any kind of dangerous situation for (y/n)." Aaron spoke, and even though Spencer wanted to yell back at him, he stayed silent. All because he knew that he was completely capable of hurting your kidnapper.

Reid decided not to say another word and keep hearing the plan Aaron had made. His role would be to wait for you outside the place along with an ambulance, ready to comfort you. He knew that when you walked out of the door, his whole world would stop and that he would hold you with all his strength to never let you go again.

When you first talked about the possibility of getting together, you both knew that by working on the B.A.U. either of you could become the victim in any case you had. Despite this, both of you tried not to think often about that. You tried to keep your mind focused on work when a case was taking place. But now, now that was impossible for Spencer.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

You were shaking, shocked, and crying when you heard a gunshot, followed by the sound of your kidnappers' body falling to the floor. It was over. They all were there to save you. The unsub was dead, and now you were free once again.

"(y/n)!" Hotchner's voice took you out of that dissociating state. "We'll get you out of here. Get up." You felt your boss grabbing your arm and lifting you up from the cold ground.

"Is she okay?!" It was Emily's voice that came from outside the basement. You could hear the worry in her tone.

"She's got some wounds, but she'll be okay. I'm bringing her out." Aaron kept talking with the rest of the people there, but you barely processed what they were saying.

You were still shaking. You felt your head starting to hurt when the sun rays reached your face. How long had you been in there? Hours? Days? You couldn't say properly. The images of what had happened this past time repeated on your head, the food you were forced to eat, the freezing floor, and the dead body falling in front of you.

Your head was racing, but it all seemed to disappear when you saw him: Spencer.

He ran into your direction, leaving behind his vest and any kind of equipment he had to wear due to the protocol. Spencer hugged you, feeling your shaking body against his, thinking about everything he wanted to tell you and how sorry he felt because you had to go through this.

Reid was warm. It wasn't a minor detail since his warmth made a huge contrast with all the coldness that was inside that basement. You felt like Spencer's hug was the first thing that actually made you feel like you had been saved. You knew that by being in his arms again, you were safe.

With all this going through your head, your body started to calm itself. Your boyfriend didn't let go the hug until you did first, he knew that you needed it more than any kind of therapy, Reid knew that you needed him. His hug felt like a place in which you could find solace, a place where everything that happened was forgotten and only comfort mattered. A hand of his was caressing your back, and with every move that he made you felt a little more cared.

You didn't know how much time you spent hugged to Spencer, but it didn't matter, cause it was what you needed.

Slowly, you pulled away from Reid, his eyes instantly meeting yours. It broke your heart to see such a sorry look in his eyes, but you understood that it was the only way he could feel at the moment. Other team members walked closer to you, they checked up on you, and you told them all that you were fine now.

Once you could be alone with Spencer again, you grabbed his hand and looked at him. Reid was avoiding your gaze at all costs, and you knew exactly why that was happening.

"Spence... look at me..."

"I failed to protect you..." His voice was filled with guilt. "Look what she did to you..." Now he dared to look up, and as he did a hand caressed the side of your face that had a bandage on it. Reid's eyes started to get teary, and he had to look away to not cry. He felt like with the team being around, he couldn't break so easily.

"You didn't fail to do anything... It was just bad luck. I'm back here with you now. You guys saved me..." You tried to look the positive side of things, as you hated to see your boyfriend blaming himself for your kidnap.

"How can I make it up to you...?" His voice was still cracked, but you knew that he didn't want to dig deeper into the topic.

"Just stay with me. I'll tell you when I'm ready to be alone again."

Spencer looked at you, and he gently grabbed your back to make your body lean over his. Now your head was resting in his shoulder, one of his arms around you. Reid kept caressing your body, and you just stayed in silence as he did. Maybe the moment wouldn't last long, and it wasn't even the smallest part of what you would need to recover from the situation, but when you both were sitting there, it felt like nothing could ever harm you again. You knew that as long as Spencer was right beside you, you would overcome anything.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

Months had passed since the incident. You were still recovering from it and hadn't gone back to work. You had made a lot of progress, but unavoidably, there were setbacks.

You woke up in a cold sweat, your heart racing as you tried to focus on the fact that it had been a nightmare, since months ago you were safe. Your hands reached out for the sheets, trying to touch something that made you snap back from that terrified state. Your breathing was still irregular, and you could feel how it wasn't getting any better.

There had been something particular about that nightmare that affected you this much. Your head was spiraling with the images of that dream, when a hand placed on your back stopped it all. It was like knowing that he was there made you feel better almost instantly.

"Bad dream?" Your boyfriend's voice made you turn around, you only nodded in response.

Spencer sat up on bed, pulling his hand away from your back. Once he had made himself comfortable enough to speak to you face to face, he analyzed your face. He already sensed it was related to your kidnap.

"Do you wanna tell me what happened in it?" Now you were shaking your head. "It's fine... Actually, nightmares may occur when your body wants to send you signals that something is happening in the real world. Like, if you're sleeping over your arm and it's getting numb, your brain might make you dream that that same arm gets shot, and then you wake up and stop putting pressure on your arm..." He started to ramble, and you only smiled at him with a certain tireness in your face.

"I'm pretty sure it wasn't related to that... but I'll take in the knowledge." Reid smiled, relieved that you took it with a small hint of humor. "I'm sorry I woke you up."

"Don't be. If I can help you in any way, then it is a pleasure to wake up. Besides that, you know that for me it's always a good thing to wake up next to you." Now you were smiling. Spencer pulled you in for a hug, and he placed a couple of kisses on your face. "I love you, never doubt that. If you need me to help you with even the smallest of problems, don't doubt to reach out for me. I'm your boyfriend (y/n). I love you, and everything I want to do is see you alright..."

You both stayed in silence. There were no words left to say. Despite the fact that you had many setbacks along the way, it was reassuring to know that you could always count on Spencer to be there for you. And even though he didn't say it as often as he'd like, Reid loved you with all of his heart. He would always be ready to drop everything for you.

Everyone always told Spencer how smart he was and how much knowledge his mind held. But for him, there was only one thing he genuinely wanted to know and understand, and it was you.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

[stvrnioloslvt]

the estes method - Matt Sturniolo

bf!matt × gf!reader

PART TWO HERE

disclaimer: the following content might not be suitable for everyone. please, read the triggers list before reading this story. also, english is not my first language, but i hope you enjoy it nevertheless!

triggers: ghosts, shadow figures, the estes method, kinda scary? (not a lot though, i'm the first scaredy cat out there)

inspired by the trailer of this week's episode of hell week. and yes, sam and colby make an appearance in the story. enjoy!

「 ★ ★ ★ 」

i knew it was a bad idea. i mean, as much as i loved haunted places and acting like a ghosthunter, i knew it had complications that i was not prepared for.

but when the triplets were invited by sam and colby for their new episode of hell week they had no problem in tagging me along. and, frankly speaking, i was excited. the last time i filmed with them nothing much had happened, so i was curious to discover what would happen this time. however, nothing could have prepared me for what awaited ahead of me.

1:30 a.m.

"guys, can i do the estes method?"

"you really love that method, don't you?" the cam that sam was holding went straight to my face, startling me. i chuckled as colby gave me the ok to perform it.

"by the way, am i the only one that has been seeing things since i stepped foot in this place?"

five heads turned towards me, eyes wide open.

"what did you just say?" asked nick, turning pale.

"like, shadows that aren't ours moving on the walls, figures running from one room to another...is it only me?" at that point i felt like i was going crazy: the boys didn't have that much of a different reaction, and the camera was still in my face.

"so basically what you're saying is that you have been seeing things for over an hour and you haven't said anything?" sam and colby exchanged knowing stares, probably making a mental annotation to check the footage to see if they caught anything.

"i mean, even when i saw those shadow figures right in front of you, you didn't say anything, so i thought that i was hallucinating. but like...now it's worse" i ended the sentence with a whisper, as the camera panned to the triplets' faces.

"are they touching you? talking?" at this point chris just went back and forth, watching out in case he missed something.

"no, nothing, just circling us...or me. i'm not sure. hey, do you think it might be because i drew like tons of protective sigils on me?"

"YOU WHAT?" screamed sam and colby. i stumbled back, not expecting such a strong reaction.

"yeah, i figured that it could have been dangerous to come here without some sort of protection. i drew them on the triplets too, one per each, but no one is seeing what i am seeing. do you think that they're messing with me because they cannot touch me or whatsoever?"

"could be. messing with your mind instead of directly attacking you on a physical level is definitely an option. just...let us know if something happens, ok?"

i nodded. and, as we moved through the building, i prayed to whatever existed above us to keep us safe.

i turned towards matt, who was looking at me with a worried gaze.

"baby, are you sure you are ok? we can step outside if you need to"

i smiled and tiptoed to kiss him on the cheek. our hands brushed together as matt grabbed it to keep me close to him.

"eww disgusting"

"fuck off, nick"

"you too, bitch"

2:17 a.m.

"ok guys, now that the triplets have done the estes method it is y/n's turn" as colby spoke to the camera, matt put the blindfold on my eyes. he bent down to whisper in my ear a shy "i love you", then he put the headphones around my neck.

"y/n, are you ready?"

there was something heavy in the air. something wrong, something scary. i could feel the ways the boys were tensing up, anticipating something, anything. i felt my heart beating faster, my hands cold and sweaty as i saw pitch black in front of me.

with a raspy voice i replied to sam "yeah, i'm ready."

and so it begun.

the estes method

"chris is sitting next to you. if anything happens, tap on his leg"

i took a big breath in as the headphones fell snugly on my ears.

immediately i was hit with a multitude of noises: radio interferences, tv static noise, every once in a while i caught on the voice of a woman. she sounded like she was hurting.

"one"

the thing i hated the most about this method was that from the moment in which the headphones started blasting sounds it was as if you were alone in a parallel world. no matter how hard i squinted my eyes, or how much i tried to block out those noises, i just couldn't see or hear the people that were all around me.

"no"

"pain"

"hurt"

that voice, that woman...she was scared for her life. every time she spoke i could hear her whimper, almost crying.

"guys i think it is a woman speaking and she sounds like she is in pain. i don't know if it is related to what you've been asking but i thought you would want to know it"

the noise in my ears started getting stronger, higher. i put my head in my hands that were resting on my knees, then gripped the headphones so i could hear the woman better. there was something sinister about the new noise, it seemed like it was trying to cancel out the spirit in pain.

the best way i could describe it is as if a war had started and none of the two opponents could prevail on the other. i felt my head aching in an attempt to just focus on something, anything. but as soon as i tried to do so, the noises would get even stronger, leaving me panting as if i just ran a marathon. i felt someone's hand grab my thigh and shake it hard enough for me to feel it. somebody else tried to take the headphones out of my grip, but i held them in place.

finally, i managed to hear something.

"help!" screamed the woman.

and as soon as that word left my mouth, all the noise stopped, except for the tv static noise. my breath slowed down, and i loosened up the grip on the headphones. just as i was about to ask the boys if they unplugged the device, a growling, low voice screamed in my ears "go away!"

i screamed, terrified, as i ripped the headphones away from my ears and fell on the ground in front of me. i remember calling out matt's name, and he rushed to take me in his embrace as i cried terrified of what just happened.

chaos ensured: the boys scrumbled all around me to understand what i heard, but as soon as they did that colby called out a figure standing on the doorway.

"let's go outside, we can't stay here anymore!" someone screamed, and just like that matt picked me up bridal style and ran out with the others.

"nick, open the fucking car door so i can place her inside"

"on it"

the car

"baby, are you okay?"

"fuck, she's terrified. y/n. y/n! nod if you can hear us"

i nodded. just lightly, but enough for them to notice.

"baby, can you tell us what happened? what did you hear?"

i pulled matt inside the car so he could hold me while i tried to explain in the best way possible everything without being hindered by the fear that was running through my veins.

"that's crazy. guys, i've never seen anything like that before" said colby.

"for sure. it seemed like she was in a trance. y/n, did you feel us try to take those headphones off of you ears? you had a death grip on them, seriously"

"yeah, i felt it" i whispered, still shaking in matt's embrace. the poor boy could do nothing but hold me and caress my hair in hopes that it might help me to cool down.

"there was like...noise. a lot. at first i heard the woman speaking, then something else came up and started to try cancel out the woman. the last thing she said was help, and then..."

"and then what, baby?"

"and then there was silence. no noise at all, but i still couldn't hear you guys. i was going to ask if you had unplugged the headphones but..."

was i shaking again?

chills ran down my spine at the memory of that awful, awful voice.

"c'mon baby you can do it. say it"

"all of a sudden something growled in my ear. i don't even know how to explain it, it seemed like it didn't come from the headphones. he growled go away but i heard it so fucking clearly and strong that it felt like a scream right in my ears. i'm so sorry, i didn't want to scare you, i swear"

a heavy silence doomed upon us as the boys exchanged worried looks. matt held me tighter, in an attempt to protect me from my own memories.

"we believe you, y/n, we're just shocked that this happened...have we ever lived something like this before, sam?"

"no, never. i had chills, that was fucking terrifying"

"guys i think we should wrap it up here and go home"

"yeah. matt, do you want me to drive you guys home? so you can stay in the back with y/n"

"yes, please. let's go, i really don't want to spend another second in this place."

「 ★ ★ ★ 」

would you guys like a part 2? just pure fluff, matt taking care of y/n. let me know in the comments <3

all pictures were taken from pinterest. credits to the owners!

[golbrocklovely]

soulmates? // sam golbach

A/N: here's my first fic of 13 nights!! i've had this idea for so long, and i'm happy to finally make it into a fic. i really love a good enemies to lovers, and if you do, hopefully you'll like this one. let me know what you think and please enjoy !

prompt: fans knew you and sam bickered a lot, but what they didn't know is how much you truly hated one another. you decide to prank sam with a fake tarot reading, but end up finding out secrets about him and yourself. || sam golbach x fem!reader

trigger warning: angst, name calling, enemies-to-lovers, tarot/physic, cursing, semi fluffy ending?

word count: 3429

~~~~~~~~~~

I waved at the camera, beginning my intro, "Hey yall, welcome back to my channel. Today, I'm gonna be pulling a little prank on Sam with the help of someone very special."

"Hi guys!" Colby grinned.

"Thank you so much for being on my channel today, Colby." I glanced over at him, copying his smile.

He nodded, "Of course. Wouldn't miss it for the world."

"So today, I decided I'm gonna prank Sam, in a very unusual way." I stared mischievously into the camera, "I hired a psychic and she's gonna read our futures. That's what Sam thinks this video is gonna be about. But the catch is that she's gonna make it seem like me and Sam are destined to be together."

Colby chuckled, "Oh my God, that sounds so funny."

"I hope she goes all out. I'm talking 'you two are soulmates, you need to get together now', things like that. Just to really nail home that we are supposed to be together." And as you guys know, especially if you've watched me before, me and Sam don't exactly always get along.

“You guys do fight like an old married couple though.” He snickered.

“Of course you would know that feeling, Colby. You guys are basically already married.” I sassed.

"He really is my husband. But I’ll gladly share him with you.” He teased.

I playfully swatted at him, "Anyway, I wonder what Sam's reaction is gonna be to all of this."

"Fingers crossed he runs out of the psychic's place screaming bloody murder." Colby joked.

"Jesus, that would be dramatic." I mumbled more to myself than the camera, "I'm not that terrible."

"I don't think that way, but you know Sam does." He mentioned.

I lowered the camera, glaring at him for a second. "Colby, I can't keep that in the video."

“Well, cut those parts out." He suggested.

"Fine." I cleared my throat, pulling the camera back up, "Wow, that would be kinda crazy to see. Alright, now we wait for Sam to come, and I'll catch you guys up when he gets here."

"Do you honestly think this is a good idea?" Colby questioned, raising an eyebrow at me.

"Oh, it's probably a horrible idea. And Sam is gonna be deeply annoyed with me for a while, since we all swore off pranks. But I don't care. Last week he pissed me off at Sarah's party and this is his pay back." I huffed.

"I wonder how he's gonna actually react to this. He's never had his love reading done before." He stated, looking at the cars passing by.

I shrugged, "Neither have I. But knowing him he's gonna go down the route of 'none of this is real, she's lying' and then he'll find out it's a prank and laugh for the camera, but yell at me afterwards."

"You two love to fight and argue, that's for sure." He jested, smirking devilishly.

"What can I say? He knows how to get under my skin in just the right way. So I have to reciprocate it back." I replied, glancing at the street, waiting to see Sam's car pull up. He was running late.

"Why do you let him upset you so much, if you don't mind me asking?" Colby pushed lightly, his voice low.

"When I first collabed with you guys, I wanted to make a good first impression. And when we investigated, it seemed like Sam really liked me. Or at least tolerated me and respected me." I narrowed my eyes at the memory, sucking my teeth, "But to hear him badmouth me later directly to one of my friends while he was at a party drunk, it just became clear to me that he was fake. Or at least... around me he was."

He shook his head, "Sam's never been like that before. I don't know why he would do that to you."

"Well, all I know is that he thinks I'm arrogant and loud and that I act like I'm better than everyone. Which is fucking hysterical given the fact I hate myself." I deadpanned.

Colby's expression softened. "Don't say that."

I glanced at him quickly, "Sorry, I don't really hate myself that much, but you get what I mean. Well, jokes on him. Your fans love me, and have asked me back twice at this point."

He snorted. "You have no idea how much it pains him to hear the fans love you. It's honestly really fucking funny."

"If it continues to piss him off, then I'm glad." I jeered.

He pointed at the car behind us, peaking into the rearview mirror, "Speak of the devil..."

I unbuckled my seatbelt, slowly getting out of my car. I glared at his Tesla, stupid fucking car, and trudged over to him. Colby walked up to him, giving him a quick hug.

His car had a light sheen on it, clearly wet from a wash. "Was it really necessary to get your car detailed before my video?"

"Of course it was. Anything to delay this, the better." Sam replied, smiling.

"God, I regret asking you to be in the video. I should have just got Colby." I grunted.

Sam pulled open his car door, "I could leave right now. Trust me, I wouldn't mind."

"No. I want you here, just so I can continue to torture you." He rolled his eyes at me, shutting his door and alarming his car. I continued, "Hey, maybe the psychic can tell us how far up the stick is in your ass."

He feigned a grin, walking to me. "Maybe she can tell us why you constantly have a shit dating life."

"Well, you would know that very well, wouldn't you? Mister Unable-to-Commit." I sneered, stepping towards him.

Colby stood between us, "Children, please. Can we stop fighting and just film the intro with all three of us? We are gonna miss our appointment with the psychic."

"Fine. You ready?" I watched both boys nod, Sam rolling his eyes at me. I glared, turning my camera on, pausing, and then starting the fake intro. "Hey guys, today I'm here with Sam and Colby!"

The boys cheered, jumping around and acting like fools for a moment. Sam stepped towards me, yelling almost in my face. I did my best to not react, to only keep smiling.

"Wow, what an intro." I faked a laugh, trying to ignore the ringing in my ears. "So today we are at a psychic tarot reader and we are gonna get our fortunes read. Have you guys ever had that done before?"

"Yes, and boy did it tell us some bad things." Colby answered, smirking.

It hit me suddenly, one of Colby's past readings. I gasped, "Oh my God, I forgot about that!"

Sam chimed in, "Fake fan."

"Well, let's hope for some better futures then. Let's go!" I pointed at the door of the building, then turned the camera off. I smacked Sam's arm, a wince falling from his lips. "Did you really need to fucking say that? Or scream in my ear for that matter."

"What? It was just a joke." He rubbed his arm, his eyes intense, "Don't get your panties in a twist."

I crossed my arms, “I’ll make sure to send the bill from my otolaryngologist to you.”

“Don’t make up words, now.” He mocked.

I quipped, "That’s a real word, dumbass. God you are such a jerk, you know that?"

"A jerk?" He covered his heart, pretending to be wounded. "How will I ever sleep at night?"

I went to step to him, but Colby got in the way. "Don't. He's just fucking with you. Don't let him piss you off." Sam turned and walked inside. Colby lowered his voice, "Besides, you'll be getting him back soon enough."

"I know. This psychic better bring her A game." I grumbled.

We stepped inside, the scent of palo santo hitting me immediately. I felt a cozy feeling flood through me; the walls a lush deep purple velvet, the furniture in earthy and jewel tone colors. There were little trinkets and witchy things all around, some of which you could buy. I walked over to the crystal display, picking up a piece of amethyst.

"Do you honestly think crystals work?" Sam asked.

I hummed, "I'm not sure. But I like the pretty colors."

"Of course you do." He murmured.

My shoulders dropped as I spun to face him, "Have you ever considered not being mean to me?"

"I'm not being mean!" He whisper-yelled. "I'm just saying that you give off the vibe of someone that likes pretty things, including crystals."

"Oh... thanks, I guess." I looked him over, confused and annoyed. "You could have worded it differently, you know."

"Well, if you stopped assuming everything I say to you is me trying to be a dick, maybe we wouldn't be in this situation." He argued.

I place my hands on my hips, “Well if you would stop being a dick to me, I wouldn't think you're trying to always be mean."

He furrowed his brow, "Are you really still upset about-"

"Of course I am." I hissed.

He rolled his eyes, "You're sensitive."

"And you're a prick." I spat.

"Hello! Sorry for coming out a bit late. Was just finishing up my lunch. You guys must be," The psychic looked down at her paper, reading our names. "Colby, Y/N, and Samantha."

"Sam. It's Sam." He corrected.

She gazed down at the paper for a second, frowning. "Oh, my apologies. Must have been written out wrong."

"Must have..." He glared at me, and I smiled sweetly.

Colby politely stuck out his hand, "Thank you for having us. It's a pleasure to meet you..."

"Agatha Cerrony. But you can just call me Aggie," she giggled, shaking his hand. “Okay, so do you want to set up your camera, or how do you guys do it?"

"I was thinking one of us goes at a time, perhaps, and whoever isn't going will film. If that's okay with you?" I inquired, pulling out my camera.

"Of course. Whatever works for you. I will say though, I do recommend that anything too personal shouldn't be filmed, or posted, at the very least." She remarked.

"Yeah, I plan to condense all of our readings down into just some small little bites of info that fans will like to know and that we feel comfortable sharing." I explained, trying to sound serious enough so Sam wouldn't be too suspicious.

"Okay then, who wants to go first?" She asked, looking at all of us.

Colby raised his hand. She grinned excitedly, pointing him to one of the velvet stools in front of her desk. She went around, sat on the other side, and grabbed her tarot deck.

His reading went on for 20 minutes, going through multiple topics like his love life, his relationship with himself and his family, and what the future held for him and his career. I assumed that this part of the reading was true, given how easy going she was saying all of this. And since none of it sounded over the top or dramatic, it seemed pretty realistic.

Then it was Sam's turn. As Colby got up, he gave me a small wink. I choked back a giggle, keeping my face as stone cold as I could. The psychic shuffled the deck quickly, asking him what he wanted to talk about first.

"My career, please." Sam stated.

I rolled my eyes behind the camera, of course that's what he wants to talk about.

She placed three cards down, explaining that the next couple months were going to be full of success, much like Colby's reading. "However, there might be a hiccup in the future, so be cautious of new advisors or managers coming into play." Also, some of their biggest success was just a couple months down the line if they continued down this great path.

"So, keep a clear mind and focus," she reiterated. "What next?"

"How about your love life, Sam?" Colby suggested.

I beamed, "Yeah, that would be so cool to hear about."

Sam sighed, "Ehh, I don't really care-"

"Come on, Sam. Aren't you the least bit curious? You haven't had a gf in almost a year. That's almost unheard of for you." I jested.

He narrowed his eyes at me, "Thanks, Y/N."

Colby smirked. "Look I got mine read, and she's gonna get hers. Do yours."

Sam turned back to the psychic, shrugging nonchalantly. "Fine. Tell me about my future girlfriend. Or love life..."

Aggie nodded, shuffling the deck quickly. I grinned over at Colby, zooming in on the cards she pulled from the deck. "Well, these cards are telling me that while you have been single for a bit, you do seem to have feelings for someone, even if you don't like admitting to it."

Colby audibly gasped, "Wait what?"

"Oh... that's," Sam cleared his throat, "um, interesting."

"It feels like you hold yourself back a bit when it comes to this person." She placed a couple more cards down, pointing at the first one, "This card shows that while you do have feelings, you also are upset with this person. Or maybe, it's more of a back and forth with them. Sometimes you love them, sometimes you hate them. They frustrate you, but you also enjoy that frustration."

"Sounds like someone we know..." Colby whispered to me.

"Do you know who I could be talking about? Is there someone in your mind?" She queried.

Sam squirmed in his seat, shaking his head. "Um, n-no. I don't think so."

She squinted at him for a moment, "Okay..." Aggie pulled more cards from the top, nodding her head at them. "Oh, see. This explains some stuff to me."

His back stiffened, "What do they say?"

"So, you and this person go way back. And I mean, beyond this life. You guys knew each other eons ago. And there is some unresolved tension from a past life that has caused you guys to butt heads all the time." She answered, pointing at the cards.

He blinked. "The cards say all of that?"

She chuckled lightly, "Well, yes and no. I am also a psychic so I'm tapping into my spirit guides to help me explain some of the cards more."

Colby nudged Sam, "Dude, you've been crushing on someone? Why haven't you told me? Do I know her?"

Sam pffted, "I wouldn't say a crush-"

Aggie shuffled the cards again, placing three more down. "You both know her. She's someone you met recently, probably within the last couple months. A very strong energy comes from her, which is why sometimes you butt heads. She meets you with the same energy you give."

"Recently met... strong energy... that sounds like you, Y/N." Colby commented.

"What?! Don't say that." Sam exclaimed.

I faked a glare at Colby, "Yeah, don't start Colby."

Aggie collected all of the cards, "If you want, I can see if you guys have a connection."

Sam inhaled sharply, "I don't know."

"It would be good for the video." I whispered to him.

"You're not posting this unless it says we aren't a match." He scowled.

"Alright, relax Sam. I'm not gonna post it." I gave the camera to Colby, winking. I sat down next to Sam, watching him as he scooched his chair away from me.

Aggie shuffled, placing some cards down. "Oh, well that's interesting."

"What's that?" I asked.

"Well I did pull the Lovers card, but it's in reverse." She replied.

Sam questioned, his voice cold. "What's that mean?"

"There seems to be some form of an imbalance between you two. Something that should be talked about. And these cards right here," she pointed to the others, "show that there should be harmony between you two. Because if there was, you would be together. Whether as friends or more, depending on your choice. But there is something keeping this distance and frustration between you two."

"Wow, that's crazy." I pushed for more ‘answers’, loving the way Sam's face contorted in anger. "Am I the one he has a past life with?"

"Really, Y/N?" Sam whined.

"What? Relax, I highly doubt-" I started.

Aggie interrupted, placing another card down, "Yes. You two definitely knew each other in a past life. I personally believe you used to be husband and wife, just from what my spirit guides are telling me."

"I-I'm... What?" Sam stuttered.

"I think there is a lot of unresolved communication between you two, as appearing in this card." She held the card up, showing it towards the camera. "Now obviously, I don't know for certain what's going on inside your head, but if you want to fix things between you two, and I suggest you do, you have to talk to one another. Because from what I can see, you two would work well with one another. Possibly soulmates, if you believe in something like that. But only if you listen."

Sam stood up instantly. "Okay, I think I'm done with my reading."

"Aw, you scared we're soulmates?" I taunted.

"Don't you want to get your cards read? It's late." He retorted, his eyes not meeting mine.

"Well, since your love reading turned into my love reading, I guess I'll ask about my future or whatever." I shrugged happily.

Aggie shuffled the cards as I asked about my career and future friendships. I barely paid attention, figuring the video was already done anyway. I honestly deserve an Oscar for the way I was able to hold back my laughs. God, the look on Sam's face was priceless. He looked so pissed but also weirdly nervous.

Can't wait to make it the thumbnail.

"Is there anything else you would like to ask?" She questioned, collecting her cards.

"No, I think I'm all good here." I turned to Colby, smiling at the camera. "How about we'll regroup outside and talk about what went down then?"

Colby nodded, turning the camera off. "Sounds good to me."

Sam said nothing, walking over to the waiting room chairs with Colby. As they grew closer to each other, Sam spoke in hushed tones to him.

I turned back to Aggie, shaking her hand softly. "Hey, thank you so much for letting us film here. I really appreciate it. That whole bit about Sam and I being soulmates was really good."

She raised an eyebrow at me, "Bit? I'm not sure what you mean by that."

"Also, I know this is probably really weird to ask, but on the phone, you had a thick accent of some sort..." I explained, a bit confused, "It almost sounded French to me? Are you from there or-?"

"Oh! You must have been talking with Madeline," she laughed. "She's the owner of this place, I'm just one of her friends who does readings from time to time."

I hesitated, her words sinking in. "Um... wasn't she the one that was supposed to do the reading?"

"Yeah, did she forget to call you? She's sick, out with a cold," Aggie mentioned. "But I figured she wouldn't mind me doing your reading anyway. We've both been practicing tarot readers for 20 years."

"Uh.. Uh, did she tell you about what I wanted this reading to be about?" I stammered.

"Unfortunately she didn't write that out in her schedule, but you asked me during your session. Was there anything in particular you needed me to read for you? I can do another session real quick before the next group comes in." She suggested.

"No, no that's fine. Um, I-I..." I exhaled deeply, trying to calm myself. "So everything you just told me, about me and Sam and how in past lives we were together and that we would actually work out really well if we dated... that was all true?"

"That's what the cards said, yes. Along with my own personal psychic feelings," she admitted. "If you want I can give you some more resources and you can look the cards up on your own if you need some further explanation."

"Thank you, I appreciate that." I mumbled, barely listening to what she said.

As she gathered up some papers, jotting down some books for me to check out, I glanced over at Sam. He was still talking to Colby, but looking at me. His face was hard to read, but his eyes had this softness in them I hadn't ever seen before.

My heart skipped a beat as we locked eyes.

[wonton4rang]

Kiss and make up ¡!

pairing: bnd legal line x gn!reader

warnings: smut +18, some toxic behaviour (ig idek atp), cursing, unprotected sex (be safe y'all 😔) and I think that's about it, lmk if I missed anything.

genre: smut. ♡

summary: how would be make up sex with boynextdoor members (legal line - everyone but woonhak)

note: I was going to post an ask I got ready for today but tumblr kinda glitched and it delete half of it so I need to re-write and edit it again :'( please enjoy this as an apology <3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

sungho; make up sex with him can be overwhelming, and it most likely will, there could be two reasons for it: he is sooooo sorry for everything that he keeps whispering little "sorry, baby" into your ear or he's still kinda mad and just fucks you out of despair. either one you will feel so good and full that you will forgive him for anything you got mad for in the first place. it was sungho and his strong body and gifted cock against you, tbh who would go against that? his pretty foxy eyes looking down on you with so much appreciation, his lips glossy due to your own saliva and his hair sticking to his forehead due to the sweat. he was so hot and it was just a small disagreement anyways, nothing you guys couldn't talk about after you were stuffed full like a pillow.

riwoo; i see him into some dynamic type of sex, nothing crazy but something that would consume lots of energy, like fucking you in some odd yet pleasant position with no rest, your knees numb and your arms trembling, but when it's make up sex he would be the sweetest and most cliche person, laying you on your back and caressing your cheeks while he left a trail of kisses all over your face, neck and your collarbone, mumbling how pretty you were and how much he hated to fight with you. he's just so sweet and good for you :(( you guys definitely talk about things and get to a solution together, it might be even faster than with other members since i feel like riwoo will understand and make his point clear so that it can be solved accordingly and fast.

jaehyun; he's crying. but not like a few tears shed, he's crying his eyes out whenever you guys have an argument about anything and everything and he really doesn't wanna see you afterwards because he feels so wronged. but when you knock on the door of your shared bedroom after giving him some space, he would make a light pout, looking away so you can know that he's still mad. it only took you two minutes of "baby, I'm sorry, it was not my intention to yell at you. It's not your fault that I'm stressed and I'm sorry I let it out on you, can you please forgive me?" and he will, cause jaehyun is like a little puppy to you, he would never say no, better yet, his answer was "i forgive you, y/n, how 'bout I help you getting rid of that stress, hm?" and then he made you come around his cock twice, giving you a third orgasm while eating you out and softly giggling at your wasted look, kissing you before helping you get a relaxing bath and then tuck you in bed.

taesan; I think I've said this before but I don't see him as a highly sex-drived person, not really understanding all the hype about it, yes, it was good and he loved to fuck you and make love to you, but it was not his top priority. yet I do believe he has his triggers. so when you guys got into this heated argument he realized something: he found your angry self very appealing, the way you yelled at him and pushed his chest making him grin a little bit at the fact that he could tower you and stop you in any moment but you felt that you controlled him. the whole discussion was about some girl that held his arm earlier and he did not move her, you were furious cause you knew how much he hated physical contact with most people and letting that random girl do it like that? you raged. "is this funny to you?" you said, getting him back from his thoughts. "she's no one, love, but I can show you why you are mine right now" you were confused, not following his words are they were so out of place. "you're so hot when you get cold" was the last thing he said before taking you into a deep kiss that ended up with you crying out his name while he made love slowly to you, pounding your cunt full while his soft and wet lips kissed your face. taesan was yours, all yours, no else mattered to him, he did not have any interest in other girls. it was you, you were his one and only.

leehan; where do I even start? he would listen to everything you have to say, quietly nodding to the points you're making and chewing his cheek to avoid saying anything stupid that would interrupt your failed version of an apology, because right now all he can think about is the away your boobs wiggle under your loose large tshirt with every move that your hands do, your tights looking so pretty that he couldn't avoid staring and you noticed, snapping your fingers in his face and rolling your eyes when he just smirked at you, throwing his hair back and sitting comfortably in the couch before spreading his legs a little bit. "if you're so sorry you could show me with actions, y/n" he was so cocky that you couldn't even be mad at him, straddling in his lap and moving your panties aside when he took his dick out and aligned it with your soaked entrance. "you're going to fuck me so good, aren't you, baby?" a soft kiss was pressed in your lips and he leaned back to let you ride the shit out of him. the so called argument long gone.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hope you guys enjoyed!! <33

[voxmortuus]

Can you write something about Hannibal or Will (whoever you want in separate) about them being a munch? The "munch" is a person who likes a LOT to eat out a woman without recieving something back. I just feel that my boy Graham (and ofc Hanni as well) would spend hours down there (more like to their own pleasure)

Just if you feel comfortable!!!

►PAIRING: Will Graham X F!Reader ►UNIVERSE: Hannibal ►WORDS: 402 ►SUMMARY/PROMPT: See Above. ►TRIGGER WARNINGS: First Person Reader | Nothing but smut | Oral *Female Recipient* | I may be missing some, but you get a general idea, so please proceed with caution if there is anything in there that is overly triggering please let me know politely and I will make sure it is added to the list. ►NOTE: Sorry if this isn't what you expected, or had envisioned yourself, I apologize. But I hope you enjoyed my vision. ►DIVIDER CREDIT: @nyxvuxoa ►My Master Masterlist | Hannibal Masterlist

It was simple with Will, he never asked for anything in return. It was like my pleasure was his, and that was something new for me. Laying there my body trembled, the way his tongue worked as if it was a personal symphony he was conducting just for me. I couldn't find my words, not that I needed to speak at all, but I couldn't find them, it's like they were all gone. He left me speechless, and that's saying something because I always have something to say.

As I look down at him his eyes peering up at me as he grips at my body, the way his hands feel against my skin. It's like everything is on fire without really being on fire. My nerves being worked and so many paces my body has been going through. It feels like he's been down there for hours, and I'm already two orgasms in.

Remembering back to a conversation from earlier. Will had told me how he felt about receiving pleasure. He much prefers to give it. Not really one on getting it, he told me my pleasure is his, and while at first I didn't believe it, not many liked being down there if you will, he on the other hand, he's taken me to a whole new world. He's been nothing short of perfect in his guidance. Glancing up to check on me, feeling this urge to grip at me, feeling me tremble and squirm.

Feeling him as he laps me up, as he takes such intricate care to even the most sensitive and insecure parts of me, he takes pride in what he does. I glance over at the clock, not on purpose, but my head turns in that direction as my third orgasm rises and I realize he's already been down there for two hours, and he was showing no sign of being done.

My breathing grows heavier as I let out a scream in pure ecstasy. My body, my mind, everything feels like I'm on a cloud, floating above, light, and tingly, as he keeps going, lapping, suckling, nipping, harder, deeper and hitting all the right notes. After this, a girl will never look at someone else going down there the same way again, the bar, that bar is set so high. With no sign of him letting up, I buckle up for another wild three-hour ride.

[thequeenofthedisneyverse]

can we have villain kenji dating headcanons please😞🙏

Oh boy...well, I can try

Villain! Kenji x Fem reader

Mentions of blood, fighting (not with you), and death/character death (not you), you being morally grey...and Kenji being a simp.

He's a complete sweetheart to you and WORSHIPS the ground you walk on. Ever heard of a feminist nut-case? It's him. He respects you wholeheartedly and sees you for you because his mama raised him right.

Super gentle and a soft-talker with you. You're...actually the ONLY person he's like this around. To everyone else, arrogant prick x10 on a regular basis.

He likes to cuddle you after a long day and whisper sweet-nothings into your ear. "I missed you so much" "I love you so much, baby" "stay with me, please" cue the cutest goo goo eyes you've ever seen. How could you say no to him?

This man doesn't know when to stop gifting so whenever he even THINKS about something you would like you better prepare for there to be a box of whatever product it is on your doorstep.

Gamer girl? New gaming equipment in your favorite color. Book girl? New books on your doorstep. Baker, artist, crafter? All of it on your doorstep.

You ask for something? Consider it done. You LOOK at something in the mall? It's yours.

If he thinks a certain outfit would look good on you or he finds a certain candy, you like? All yours...just please don't leave him.

Ken lets you ride on his motorcycle from time to time. He prefers you in the back with your arms wrapped around him because it's a comforting feeling, not to mention safe. But if you want, he'll let you sit in the front but it's rare.

A guy cat-called you once while Kenji was there with you. Yeah uh...that guy was sent to the hospital. It was the first time you've ever seen him so...angry. You've heard rumors of Kenji's temper but seeing as he was so sweet to you, you just thought the rumors were just...rumors.

That was until you literally had to pull him off the guy so he wouldn't kill him. Seriously, he was strangling him after punching him in the face 10 times.

It was...kind of hot to be fair.

Kenji's hair was disheveled, his nose bleeding, and a fiery look in his eyes. And you found his act of rage a little sweet. If he was willing to strangle a guy for just catcalling you, what would he do if a guy touched you?

You then realized you found a good guy who's willing to stand up for you! Albeit a bit crazy, but still a good guy.

After his anger went away, the soft side of him came back and apologized to you profusely.

"I- I'm so sorry baby, p- please don't leave! Y- You were never supposed to see that side of me, shit! I'm a good guy I promise I am! He...he just, he deserved it! He shouldn't have been talking to you like that! You're a princess to me baby, a queen! And you deserve to be treated like one...please don't leave me..."

He meant every word of it girl...every. last. word. Especially the "don't leave me" parts.

Before you came along, Kenji was alone. So utterly alone. His beloved mother was dead. His father....ugh (don't even get him started on that). No friends or relatives to talk to or come by. One-night stands didn't do anything except a couple seconds of bliss.

So, like I said, so completely and utterly alone.

But when you came along...you changed that. An angel from the heavens that chose him to spend their time with.

This man would let the world burn if it meant to save your life. He doesn't like people very much anyway.

He introduced you to Lillith, his black IBM female boa. Let's pretend you like snakes.

Snake ahead, TRIGGER WARNING

You find her absolutely adorable and sweet. She likes you a lot too! You let her hang around your neck or arm when Kenji brings her too your dates or when you hang out at his house.

Kenji loves that his two favorite girls are getting along. He has many pictures of you two chilling in his phone and looks at them from time to time to actually feel something other than anger or nothing while he's out.

You brought back a light in him that he thought had died a long time ago. A reason to live...well, apart from baseball, killing Kaiju's, and ruining his father's legacy of course.

Fancy dining places are a must. You can't blame the man for want to wine and dine you...and showing you off to the press a little bit.

Hmmm...you found it odd that the guy that cat-called you hasn't pressed charges or uttered a peep about what ken did to him. You understood why the news hadn't caught footage of the incident tho.

It happened late at night when you and Kenji were coming out of a bar. It had been raining that night and most of the lights went out due to the water getting to the electricity.

So, it would be hard for the cameras to pick up faces very well due to the darkness and most of them circuiting out too.

But it was so strange...nothing from him.

You got your answer when you turned the news on though.

The guy that cat-called you was found dead in a trash bin next to the EXACT same bar you had your date with Kenji. Ishima Agama was his name.

He seemed to have suffered horrible lacerations, burns, severed limbs, and much other nasty things.

His death...didn't bother you though. You figured Kenji must've done it. I mean...who else would've done it? It only happened two weeks after Kenji pummeled him, and it was in the exact same place it beat his ass.

You always trusted your gut and your gut says it's Kenji. But instead of seeing this as a red flag, you saw it as a green one!

He killed for you just because of a cat-calling degenerate. That's the nicest thing a guy has ever done for you!

After dating for about a year or so, he told you that he was Ultraman! Which...is the coolest freaking thing ever!

He saved Japan from Kaiju's countless of times! So, what if his methods were a little violent? The Kaiju's were too. That's how violent animals were supposed to be treated right? Either with sedatives or brute force.

He was so confused as to why you were so cool with it but as you explained your reasons...he knew you were a keeper.

After that little adventure he introduced you to the idea of Kaiju meat. Something Kenji has tailored to him and a few other rich people (let's pretend Kaiju's don't have radiation). Turns out the KDF also sells a few cutlets of meat to a few rich folks who want a taste of a rare "delicacy" meat.

It's actually quite good when it's cooked and served right, better that wagyu.

Sooo, yeah, you two lovebirds get along great!

His anger issues, arrogance, or murderous tendencies to affect you because you love him for who he is...and for the fact that he never acts that way toward you.

That's all I've got, if you guys want anything more specific, lmk!

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Unorthodox 2

Warnings: this fic will include elements, some dark, such noncon/dubcon, and other untagged triggers. Please take this into account before proceeding. It is up to curate your online consumption safely.

Summary: you bring order to the disordered life of Captain Syverson.

Characters: Captain Syverson, this reader is known as Izzie.

Author’s Note: Please feel free to leave some feedback, reblog, and jump into my asks. I’m always happy to discuss with you and riff on idea. As always, you are cherished and adored! Stay safe, be kind, and treat yourself💜

💼Part of the Bad Bosses AU💼

Adrenaline pumps behind your ears. You sit in the dirt, heart thumping, body tingling, you're breathless. You can't believe you just did that.  

You tug on the strap of the chute as it digs into your shoulder. You steady you grip on your phone as you look up at the sky as you try to still your shaking. You just fucking jumped out of a plane and lived. Wow. 

You hit send on the video. The girls aren't going to believe you without evidence. Besides, you feel bad for missing cocktails. You'll be there in spirit. 

A sudden release has you feeling lighter as the chute detaches. You're lifted from behind by the empty back strapped onto you, "Iz, you good?" Sy asks. 

"I'm... alive," you say as you lower your phone and steady your feet, "that was..." 

"Come on," he meets your trembling disbelief with his stern intensity. "You know we still got stuff to do." 

You clear your throat and let out a deep breath, "sure thing, Sy." 

"Whatcha doin' anyway?" He taps your phone before you can tuck it away. "UberEats don't come out here." 

"Pfft," you scoff, "girls are having drinks. Was just sending them my regards." 

"Girls," he utters, "you tell them I'm sorry for keeping ya. Tequila Izzy must be a lot of fun." 

"I told you, I don't drink Tequila," you counter.  

"Sure, ya don't. You just never had good tequila." 

"Please," you turn to walk in time with him across the sandy field, "you know good liquor? I'm the one who stocks your footlocker." 

"Patron ain't too bad. I just don't like the price tag," he shrugs. 

“You? Careful about money?” You shake your head. 

“Eh? Last I checked, you were my money manager.” 

“Well, it wasn’t in the job description but there wasn’t really one, was there?” You kid as you keep step with him. You look ahead and the last of the thrill slakes away. “So, what are we doing here, Captain?” 

“Why ya callin’ me Captain for?” He nudges you with his elbow, “don’t sweat it.” 

Your eyes pinpoint in the distance as you try to see more than sand. Your cheeks slacken and your lips straighten. Business. It isn’t like it used to be. It’s more than emails and Zoom calls. No, it’s life and death. 

“Really, you don’t need to worry. He’s an old buddy. He’s just... livin’ off the grid right now.” 

“You sure?” You ask. 

“What happened to trust?” He challenges. 

“When did I ever say that word,” you mutter and chew your dry lip. 

He huffs, “don’t start. Come on. Won’t be no time.” 

He’s right. You approach a compound behind a thick metal fence. The sun beats down so hotly that you can see a ripple in the air and it looks as if the bars are bending. Like Sy, you’ve wrapped a scarf around your head to sop up your sweat and protect your face. 

You don’t miss the men perched on the posts or those just within. They have guns. They ready them at your approach. Sy shoots up a green flare that has them standing down. He stops you twenty feet from the gate. 

“He’ll come to us before we can go in.” 

You look at Sy. He’s calm, unbothered by the guns and the watching men and the burning sun. Out here, he’s in his elements. He’s confident in the matters of blood and violence, everything else is a mystery to him. His world is foreign to you. You live in the little nooks and cranny’s he doesn’t see; the business of living not killing. Bills, laundry, doctor’s appointments, deadlines, dishes... 

The gate opens and you tense. He taps your wrist, “ease up.” 

You do your best to obey. You don’t want to put any one else on edge. Didn’t you take this job to let go of all that? To stop being so damn uptight. 

A man walks out, unarmed, though he wears an armoured vest. Sy goes forward to greet them and the chuckle as they embrace, slapping each other’s shoulders. You stay behind, wary of the shadows behind the fence. 

“Syverson,” the man lilts, “you made it.” 

“Didn’t make it easy, Conrad,” Sy snorts. 

“Mm, but I thought you were coming alone,” the man looks past him and nods in your direction, “if you’d said a lady was accompanying you, I’d have sent the town car.” 

“Don’t be fucking funny,” Sy reaches to muss the man’s hair. “I’m starving and tired and your jokes still aren’t amusing.” 

“Come,” the man, Conrad beckons to you, “I’ve everything ready. Beds, food...” He draws out the last word with a wink, “wine.” 

Sy tilts his head and cranes to look at you as he follows Conrad’s gaze. You cross the expanse and take Conrad’s hand as he offers it, introducing himself as ‘James’. You shake his hand and return your name in turn. Sy turns forward and squares his shoulders. 

“Might I ask how you know each other?” Conrad turns to walk at your other shoulder as he points you onward. 

“Mmm, she’s...” Sy mulls his answer with a grumble. 

“Personal assistant,” you fill in for him. 

“Oh? How amusing,” Conrad remarks, “and in this line of work.” 

[zombflesh]

how do you think ak!jay likes to be hugged (i miss him)

I'm about to yap a lot for this one so strap in. I personally think that Jason wouldn't exactly be used to hugs even before he was tortured. Physical attention wasn't something he was given that much as a child, and he's way used to touch being a negative instead of a positive. His short time with Bruce probably helped him accept that touch wasn't a negative thing until the Joker ruined it all. After Arkham Knight, Jason would not be able to properly stomach any kind of physical contact. He's been tortured, beaten, and is at his lowest point. Jason doesn't even feel human at this point because after everything he can only see himself as a shell of who he once was. The littlest things are a trigger to him. Something as simple as a pat on the shoulder makes him want to claw at his own skin. Jason's S/O would need to be very patient at first. Physical affection is a concept that has been tainted for him. He's trying hard to get used to your gentle touches because he wants to be with you. Jason doesn't want you to be with someone that can barely take care of themselves. Jason wants you to be with a person instead of the ghost that he perceives himself as. Jason heals and slowly but surely, he leans into your hugs. Now to actually answer the question sorry for going on that long ass tangent

At first, Jason's hugs would feel like hugging a statue. Very stiff and he barely moves a muscle. That stiffness slowly melts away the more he heals. And when this man hugs believe me, he HUGS. Jason is starved of affection, and he feels safe in your around. When he hugs you it's always firm but gentle. Jason wants to make you feel safe in his arms like how your presence makes him feel safe. Snuggling with him would feel like hugging a giant teddy bear. Jason would hold you to his chest while his fingers would either rub your back or play with your hair. Of course, there are always those hugs where he picks you up and spins you around. Jason's hugs would be so tight and so warm.

Jason is a forehead kisser and anyone who says otherwise is wrong. After every hug he's give you a big smooch on the forehead. Hear me out on this next part. Little spoon Jason. HEAR ME OUT PLEASE!! Yeah, he prefers to be big spoon. But Jason would melt whenever you hold him. Just imagine the realization that Jason is being held hitting him and he just leans into the hug. He would bury his face into your shoulder and let out the most content sigh. Love, security, and warmth are all things he can find in your arms. Jason would love it if you held him before he fell asleep. His face would be pressed against your chest as he listens to your heartbeat. The rhythm of your heartbeat would help him fall asleep because it's just comforting to know that your still there. He relaxes as soon as you brush your fingers through his hair. Or even hearing you talk is enough to make him unwind.

There's something so sweet about Jason letting himself be held idk what it is

[angels-fantasy]

Girl let me just say your fics are superb and thanks for the quirkless child one I requested with Bakugou! I promise I’ll leave you be for a bit in a second, but… post final war; everyone who has came out alive clearly is suffering from injuries, health issues, and trauma (both physical trauma and mental trauma) no? So how about a Bakugou x Reader with a reader who was essentially Bubbly, Firery and Energetic, to after the war who is exhausted, is often having nightmares over Bakugou cause well he nearly died, sleep deprived and basically depressed because I can guarantee nobody should be sane after a war, especially not children like our lovely highschoolers. Please make it angst to comfort, because seeing how Bakugou also has developed I’m sure as sad as he would be he would also be understanding and try to be comforting (despite his awkwardness). I’d appreciate if you could get this done to be as close as possible (and maybe just a little long than the one I requested last time- no pressure) BUT if anything you find in my request may be too triggering or something feel free to make it less triggering and change it, I just ask if you can keep the same vibe and theme with the reader who changed drastically after the wars and is getting comforted by Bakugou, Angst to comfort (duh), thank you so much, and I hope I’m not troubling you too much! — An anon who enjoys suffering, angst, and comfort ((SAC) Anon); (get it? Suffering, Angst, Comfort, SAC, wait that has a good ring to it, damn I have a new alias, I’ll shut up now)

I'm Okay, As Long as He's Here (Request)

Katsuki Bakugou x Reader

Details/Warnings: reader has a panic attack and nightmares!! pls be weary of this. angst to fluff, well, my attempt at angst lol

Word Count: 1k

thank you for your request and the support :D it means a lot to me 🩷 btw don't ever feel like you're bothering me or like you need to leave me alone! i like talking to everyone :) also this is a good little plot, but im not the best at writing angst but this is helping me improve i think, so please tell me how i did! i really hope you like it SAC anon hahah

Before the war, you were a different person. Looking at you now, no one would ever guess you were once a bubbly, out going person. But Katsuki knew you were, and sometimes, he missed the old you.

It was hard to watch you wake up crying in the middle of the night from your horrible nightmares of the war. Some being about his near death experience, and others being about him dying in other ways.

Some nights, you didn't sleep at all, and it was really showing.

"Hey, keep your head up. I don't want you to fall asleep." Katsuki said. It was already months after the war, so you were all back at school, but you were one of the few students that was struggling the most.

He definitely has his struggles too, but he knew he had to be there for you, because yours were much worse.

You opened your eyes wider, trying your best to stay awake. "Sorry. I couldn't sleep last night."

"You havin' nightmares again?"

You nodded, he sighed.

"Come sleep in my dorm tonight. You sleep better with me and you know it."

You agreed and continued trying your best to stay awake for the rest of the day. Occasionally, Katsuki would have to wake you up or remind you to stay awake. The lack of sleep made it hard to focus, especially in Hero Training. Thankfully, Mr. Aizawa and the rest of the teachers were understanding of the students who were struggling.

Once school was over it felt like a weight was lifted off of your shoulders. You knew you had homework to do, but right now you'd rather sleep. Or at least attempt to. Since you were going to be with Katsuki tonight, you were probably only going to have one nightmare. Plus, he'd be there to comfort you.

Following your boyfriend to his dorm room, you immediately changed into some of your clothes that he had there for you, and then laid down on his bed.

For a while, you just silently watched him as he sat at his desk and did his homework, something you should also be doing.

"What're you starin' at?"

You smiled, but not as brightly as before, "I'm just admiring you."

He huffed, "Good, I'm awesome."

Rolling your eyes, you said, "And there he is."

He laughed and continued doing his homework. You just continued watching him, because it was something that comforted you. It was a reminder that he was okay and alive.

Knowing he was safe right in front of you, you fell asleep.

...

You didn't know what time it was, but it must've been late since the room you were in was dark.

You clutched your chest as you sat up in bed and breathed heavily, feeling tears prick your eyes.

Of course, you had another nightmare again. This one in particular was about Katsuki, and he was in the arms of Shigaraki. You saw the villain use his Decay quirk on him, and your boyfriend began to crumble away but you were paralyzed in your dream. There was nothing you could do.

The nightmare felt so real and so scary, like they usually do. You felt so helpless and scared. The evil that emitted from Shigaraki and All For One was something you'd always remember.

You subconsciously began to rock yourself back and forth and made self soothing noises as you continued to have a panic attack. They never got easier, or less scary as time went on. It always felt like you were going to die.

Your panic must've woke Katsuki up, because you suddenly heard his voice calling out to you.

"Hey, hey! Breathe baby, you gotta breathe." He said.

You shook your head, "I-I can't! It hurts. I'm scared, I'm gonna die!"

He carefully grabbed your hands and held them in his. He took one of them and brought it to his chest near his heart so you could feel it beat.

"What is my heart doing right now?" He asked. This was a method he used to ground you during these situations, especially because he knew how you felt about him and his safety.

You looked at his chest, "Beating. Your heart is beating."

"Right. Now what do you feel here?" He asked, now placing a hand on the blanket that was on top of you guys.

"The blanket."

"What does it feel like?"

"It's soft and fluffy."

As he continued distracting you from your panic, you eventually calmed down. You were still crying a bit, but he held you in his arms as you let it out.

"He killed you Katsuki. I was so scared, and I couldn't do anything!" You cried into his chest.

He rubbed your back, "You know that shit isn't real, no matter how real it feels. I'm right here living and breathing. I'm safe, okay?"

You nodded and sniffed, "Okay." You placed a hand on his chest over his heart and felt it beat, the steady rhythm of it comforting you.

Katsuki grabbed that hand and kissed the palm of it, "Love you. I'll be here all night, 'kay?"

"I love you too. Thank you."

"It's no problem."

The next morning, you felt more rested than usual. It must've been because you only had one nightmare, which was an improvement.

You noticed you woke up before your boyfriend, so you just let him sleep a little longer while you got on with your morning routine. You had a lot of your own things in his room, including an extra toothbrush which you were thankful for.

When he eventually woke up, he walked over to you and hugged you tightly.

"You feelin' okay?" He asked.

You nodded as best as you could in his tight grip, "Mhm."

"Be honest."

"I am! I feel a lot better than last night." You insisted as you pulled away slightly, still keeping your arms around him.

He hummed and kissed the top of your head, "Mkay. Wanna sleep with me again tonight?"

"Yeah, I'll bring more clothes later."

He smiled, "'Kay. Let's go to class." He said and threw an arm over your shoulder, making you smile up at him.

Yeah, you knew things would be okay as long as he was around.

authors note

i hope you liked it! i'm sorry it was kinda short, i've been in a little writing stump but im trying to get out of it!

love ya 🩷

tags for bakugou fics: @doumadono @shonen-brainrot

[all-wrung-out]

Whumpblr Intro

Hey! I've gone far too long without actually making an intro, despite having this side blog up for a bit. So here we go!

I go by Tac when I'm interacting online (my main blog is calligraphic-tac, and that's my chaos-corner where I try to post things I like, things that inspire me, and my more general writing, when I can actually get words out). Pronouns are she/her, although they/them are good backups.

I've been into whump for as long as I can remember, but in my 33 years on the planet, I only learned last year that there's a whole community for it. I'd heard the term "whump" before, and kind of knew what it was, but never made the connection to the type of media I like.

There are some whump tropes that I'll always enjoy, but the favorite flavor of the week is usually on rotation from the following list:

Superhero whump

Kidnapping

Defiant/Stoic/Strong/Snarky Whumpees

Self-sacrificial Whumpee

Pushing oneself until collapse (especially for Heroes/Leaders)

Whumpers who feign rage, but are actually very calculated and careful in their treatment of Whumpee

Whumpers who actually lose their temper, especially when triggered by a defiant whumpee

Team whump

Non-human Whumpee (especially when it pertains to the good, old-fashioned "what makes us human" trope)

Drug/poison whump (Fucked up balance and altered perception, anyone?)

Medical whump (specifically, medical treatment, but "This is gonna hurt.")

Lab whump (especially testing the limits of a living weapon or attempting to forcibly manifest powers that may or may not exist)

The good, old-fashioned Beating trope

Pinned/Trapped

Drowning/asphyxiation

Environmental/Wilderness whump (extreme temperatures and survival)

Animal attacks

Used as bait

Infected wounds (especially when it comes to treatment of said wounds)

Self-surgery or self-care

Mind control (Specifically, conflict between Whumper/Whumpee within Whumpee's mind while Whumper tries to take control. OH! And Whumper causing Whumpee to experience things that didn't happen; I have a really neat story idea for this one!)

I'm sure I'm missing some, but I suppose I can amend this post when I remember some more. Some of my whump tastes are also kind of specific, so listing them concisely can be a challenge.

Not going to list my squicks here. (As the saying goes: "If you don't want someone to get your goat, don't let them know where it's tied.") However, if you're looking for NSFW-type whump, I don't typically write that. (Not for other folks, anyway; I'm rather terrible at it.)

I used to write a lot as a kid, but was often ashamed of my affinity for whump, so any time I tried to write it, I chickened out and wrote something else. I still wrote plenty of action and peril, but the whump was usually not as heavy as I initially imagined.

I've also been in a bit of a writing slump for... oh, goodness... It's going on 14 years now. I really want to get out of it, so I'm hoping whump writing will help.

Fun fact about me: A lot of my stories are grown from a kernel of whump. I think of a specific scenario I want to put an OC through, and then a whole story grows out of it.

Some of my favorite whump blogs include: @whump-me @whumperofworlds @allthewhumpygoodness @emmithar-blog @soheavyaburden @whumperfultime @roblingoblin285 @blackrosesandwhump @evilwriter-originals I'm still collecting whump blogs to follow, so feel free to interact if you're one such blog!

Also, I'm going to be rusty as hell, so please bear with me while I get my writing brain reinstalled in the ol' skull-housing.

Last thing (I know this post is long already): I've seen the way the whump community interacts and I'm happy to be a part of it. I'm not especially social myself, but I'm nonetheless proud to be part of such an amazing group of folks. Keep rockin', y'all!

[into-the-grey]

~I Can't Carry This Anymore~ ALT Version

Noah x F!Reader Fic

PLEASE HEED THE WARNINGS. THIS ONE IS DARK.

Warnings: Mentions of suicide, depression,mental illness, burnout, blood, and death. This one is SAD, you have been warned.

WC: 1.7k

Taglist: @wh0th3h3llisbucky @blend-in-with-the-madness

I came across an old story I wrote for an assignment in a writing course, and it gave me this idea. I apologise in advance, this one is VERY trigger warning heavy, please, if you're not able to handle this one, don't force yourself through it. While I may not shy away from these topics, please do NOT try to handle it if you aren't able to.

I have also posted the original edition, which is also possibly triggering, but doesn't contain suicide material, but does contain talk of school shootings. You can read that one here if you feel safe to do so.

I acknowledge the sensitive nature of some of the topics discussed in this duo of stories, and please don't think I'm glorifying them or encouraging them. If anything, I beg of you, if you don't think you can handle these triggers, or your mental state is fragile in any way, PLEASE give these ones a miss and go read something fluffy. (yes I'm putting this on both.)

I know I'm probably being dramatic, it's probably nowhere near as graphic as I think, but the internet is a different place than it was when I was 14 and I just don't want anyone to suffer because I'm an idiot that enjoys writing about heavy shit.

The room was quiet, the lights off and the world outside was dim. Rain pattered softly on the window, the gauzy grey curtains masking the little light that peered through, casting shadows over your desk. 

You sat at your desk, staring at the floor. It had been a while since your mind worked the way you wanted it to. Everything seemed to blur together, and you could hardly focus on the things you wanted to. It didn't matter how hard you tried, it was like words swam on the page when you tried to read, and everything outside your home felt dangerous. You felt unwelcome, so you stayed in your room.

The only interruption to your unending solitude was him. Noah. He would come and visit you sometimes, and he would talk to you for hours.

Today was one of those days. You knew it would be, but you weren't sure why. You just felt it in the air.

You heard his slow footsteps trudging up the stairs in the late afternoon. He had probably come from the studio, or maybe he'd been writing at home. You were never sure, but he came. That's what mattered. 

He entered your room silently, closing the door and sitting on your bed. He sat silently for a moment, looking around the space. You gave him his time, letting him find what he wanted to say. You could see in his tense shoulders that it had been a hard day for him too.

'Fuck today has been rough,' he said quietly, confirming your suspicions as he picked at his fingernails. 

'Do you want to talk about it?' You asked him gently, watching him as he swallowed hard. He chewed his lip for a moment, thinking through all the messy thoughts in his mind.

If there was anything you loved about Noah, it was that you could confide in him, and he confided in you. You would bear each other's misery when you needed to, helping each other get back to the good days.

'It's just been a lot to deal with, y'know? There's a lot of pressure from the label, and I'm not sure if I'm ready for the next steps yet. I don't feel like I've had enough time. I feel lost, like everything is so muddled, and I don't know how to straighten it all out.'

You nodded, understanding him perfectly. You had felt the same, drowning in the sea of obligations and the weight of your life pulling you under. 

'If you need more time, tell them. They can't push you to do anything yet, can they?' You said, turning on your chair to face him properly.

He took a shaky breath, glancing in your direction.

'I want to say something to them, to tell them, but how do I know they'll understand?' he huffed softly, his eyes lowering to his hands again, picking at a loose thread on the hem of his black hoodie. 'The guys get it, they're supportive, but the label... Don't get me wrong, I love what I do, but this... it's a lot to process...'

'I know baby, I'm sorry,' you sighed. 'At least you have the guys. You're not alone in this, they can help you advocate for yourself.'

'They try to advocate for me, but they're still reeling too.' He sniffed hard, tears coming to his eyes. 'Everything just stopped, and it was out of nowhere. Sure, I guess we should have seen it coming, I'm sure it was building up for a long time, but we just... we didn't. I hate that we didn't see it, we could have done something, and we wouldn't have to do this. I feel like it's my fault.'

'Noah, baby, this is not your fault-'

'I know it's not, but I can't shake the feeling. I feel like I should have tried harder. It's been months of this, and I can't stop feeling this way.'

His shoulders shook as he breathed, leaning over and resting his elbows on his knees. He couldn't seem to meet your eye. You could feel the heaviness of his shame radiating off of him, and it broke your heart.

'Noah, it'll be alright, I promise,' you told him, standing from your seat and standing awkwardly by him. 

'One day it'll be better, I just wish I knew when,' he whispered.

You knelt down in front of him, searching his eyes in the low light. They glistened with heavy tears that started to trickle down his cheeks. He squeezed his eyes shut tight, unable to look at you. The guilt made his lip tremble, locking his fingers together tightly.

'So do I,' you told him, reaching for his hands. He stood, leaving your fingers hanging in mid-air as he crossed the room to look out the window.

'I haven't been able to sleep. The things people say, it's all I can hear...' He thumbed over a figurine on the windowsill, the porcelain cat cold beneath his fingers. 

'Don't listen to them. You don't owe them anything, not your time, not your energy. You need to focus on you, baby.' 

You stood, taking his place on the bed and watching him as he traced raindrops that ran down the window. You could see a hint of his reflection on the glass, catching the sad smile on his lips as stared out the foggy glass. 

'Do you remember when we were kids? How we used to be outside in weather like this, jumping in puddles and slinging mud at each other until your mom had to hose us off?' he asked with a melancholy chuckle.

'I do,' you nodded. 'I remember when we tried to build a sand-castle out of mud, and it just kept collapsing. You were so determined to make it work.'

'Things were so much easier back then. So much simpler, no deadlines, no commitments, no gossip or rumours. I miss those days.' He huffed a laugh to himself, tears still dribbling down his cheeks.

'I know. I wish things could still be like that.'

He nodded, turning around and looking over the room. You watched as his eyes took in every picture, every painting, every memory that gilded the walls. You followed his gaze, feeling tears pricking your eyes as you saw his smiling face in so many of the photo frames.

He seemed to focus on the same one you did. Your favourite picture, the two of you bundled up in thick jackets and huge gloves, you with a beaming smile and him with all the love in the world in his eyes as he looked at you. His long hair blew around his face as he grinned at you, the camera in his hand as he took the selfie. You had never seen snow like that before, but he wanted to show you.

You were so young, so stupid, and so in love.

'I wish I'd told you that day that I loved you,' he breathed. 'I wish I hadn't waited.'

'I knew, love,' you told him, glancing back at him. He stood with his arms crossed, trying to look casual, but you knew he was desperately trying to hold himself together while he longed for better times.

'I know you knew, but I still wish I'd said it. We could have had so much more time together...'

'We were still together, Noah, we were still as close as ever.'

'It wasn't enough.'

You watched the memories dance across his mind, seeing him process every single one. The good days, the bad days, the worst days.

Noah let himself slide down the wall in front of the window, looking at the floor. If he looked hard enough, he was sure he could still see it. The remnants of the worst memory.

'I'm sorry you had to see me like that, Noah,' you said quietly, knowing exactly where his mind was. 'I don't know what I was thinking.'

'I know exactly what you were thinking,' he sighed. 'You felt as alone as I do right now, and that was my fault. I should have been here for you. Everything went so wrong, so fast, and I wasn't there for you.'

'You were busy, love. Your career was taking off, you had so much to do, I couldn't put all of my shit on you. It wasn't fair to expect you to carry my load when you already had the world on your shoulders.'

'I don't care, I should have been there,' he coughed, clearing his throat. 

'I wish you weren't...' 

Your admission hung in the air, falling on his deaf ears. He sat silently for a little while, just listening to the sound of the rain on the glass. You knew he was picturing it, seeing how you struggled to breathe, how you had detroyed the rug with your blood, how you were so pale...

The rug was long gone, but the memories would always remain.

He finally stood, and you mirrored his movements, following him to the door.

'I have to go, we have another dinner meeting tonight, but I'll be back,' he promised, his hand on the doorknob.

'I'll be here,' you told him, resting your hand on his shoulder. He looked back at you, his lips pulling into a tight smile as the tears fell faster. His hand raised, touching his fingers to yours on his skin. The sob he choked back broke his heart, seeing his lip curl back over his teeth as he squeezed his eyes shut.

'I love you,' he told you, his voice wavering. 'I love you so fucking much, and I miss you every single day.'

You wished he could feel you as you wrapped your arms around him, your cheek resting between his shoulders and holding him together as best you could.

'I love you,' you told him, praying that he could hear you, 'and I'm always with you. I'm so fucking sorry, Noah.'

He pulled himself together as best he could, but your family was used to seeing him leave in tears. He opened the door, and he stepped from your grip, turning and looking back into the empty room you were trapped in.

For just a moment, his eyes met yours. You could have sworn that he could finally see you, just for a second. His trembling hand raised, reaching towards your face as he blinked through his tears.

'I love you,' he whispered again.

'I love you,' you whispered back.

His hand dropped back to his side, and he stepped away, closing the door behind him.

You sat back on your bed, staring hard at the floor as you listened to his footsteps trudge away, your heart breaking in your empty chest. Regret had never been so heavy.

Death didn't solve a thing. So why did you do it?

Why did you kill yourself?

[miffyisms]

⋆࿐໋˖𓍢ִִ໋ taylor swift - the tortured poets department (anthology) , ♡

various prompts from the selected media can be found below. it is important to read the rules of the receiving blog before sending any. feel free to change any pronouns to better suit your needs. the selected media can possibly be triggering to some, please be advised !

am i allowed to cry?

i don't cater to all these vipers dressed in empath's clothing.

nostalgia is a mind's trick.

i can hold my breath.

then we could all just laugh until i cry.

i'm seeing visions, am i bad?

it wasn't a fair fight or a clean kill.

just say when, i'd play again.

oh, was it punishment?

oh my god, you should see your faces.

blood's thick, but nothin' like a payroll.

now you know what it feels like.

you're in self-sabotage mode, throwing spikes down on the road.

this town is fake, but you're the real thing.

were you writing a book?

the devil that you know.

well, you took me to hell too.

six weeks of breathing clean air, i still miss the smoke.

go on, fuck me up.

you deserve prison, but you won't get time.

i touched you for only a fortnight.

honestly, who are we to fight the alchemy?

you say i abandoned the ship, but i was going down with it.

nothing makes me feel more alive.

who the fuck was that guy?

but when i count the scars, there's a moment of truth that there wouldn't be this if there hadn't been you.

even if i die screaming, i hope you hear it.

no one's ever had me, not like you.

yes, i'm haunted, but i'm feeling just fine.

i built a legacy that you can't undo.

fuck it if i can't have us.

i'm miserable!

i'm gonna get you back.

i'll tell you something about my good name, it's mine alone to disgrace.

so tell me everything is not about me, but what if it is?

my boy only breaks his favorite toys.

tell me all your secrets.

you know you're good when you can even do it with a broken heart.

what if your eyes looked up and met mine.

i swept in at the rescue.

now i'm down bad, crying at the gym.

i'm so afraid i sealed my fate.

i chose this cyclone with you.

all my mornings are mondays stuck in an endless february.

you were sleeping soundly when they dragged you from your bed.

it wasn't sexy once it wasn't forbidden.

i can't pretend like i understand.

i'm just getting color back into my face.

i'm pissed off you let me give you all that youth for free.

i stopped cpr, after all, it's no use

it was unnecessary, should've let it stay buried.

we both did the best we could do underneath the same moon.

you shit-talked me under the table.

touch me while your bros play grand theft auto.

you said you were gonna grow up then you were gonna come find me.

i'm combing through the braids of lies.

no way i'm gonna screw up, now that i know what's at stake.

you told me i'm the love of your life.

you kicked out the stage lights, but you're still performing.

tell me something awful.

i am what i am 'cause you trained me.

how did it end?

in fifty years will all this be declassified?

was any of it true?

there's a lot of people in town that i bestow upon my fakest smiles.

how dare you think it's romantic, leaving me safe and stranded.

they knew the whole time that i was onto something.

i just learned these people only raise you to cage you.

i dreamed about it in the dark the night i felt like i might die.

all of this to say, i hope you're okay.

i didn't opt in to be your odd man out.

move to florida, buy the car you want.

in plain sight you hid.

i'm bitter, but i swear i'm fine.

please, i've been on my knees.

just how low did you think i'd go before i'd self-implode?

who's gonna stop us from waltzing back into rekindled flames if we know the steps anyway?

pull me to the backseat.

way up there, i actually love it.

at dinner, you take my ring off my middle finger and put it on the one people put wedding rings on.

i hate it here.

what if the way you hold me is actually what's holy?

i should've known it was a matter of time.

they're gonna crucify me anyway.

he was my best friend.

this happens once every few lifetimes.

i can't forgive the way you made me feel.

does it feel alright to not know me?

you said some things that i can't unabsorb.

i just don't understand how you don't miss me.

i felt more when we played pretend.

the future's bright, dazzling.

i've seen this episode and still loved the show.

please know that i tried to hold onto the days when you were mine.

are you still a mind reader?

i'll save all my romanticism for my inner life and i'll get lost on purpose.

tell me i'm despicable, say it's unforgivable.

do you believe me now?

still alive, killing time at the cemetery

is it somethin' i did?

i read about it in a book when i was a precocious child.

you caged me, and then you called me crazy.

bet they never spared a prayer for my soul.

i stopped trying to make him laugh.

he just hadn't met me yet.

you ain't gotta pray for me.

i won't confess that i waited, but i let the lamp burn.

all your life, did you know you'd be picked like a rose?

i'm tryin' to stifle my sighs.

if you wanted me dead, you should've just said.

it's happening again.

i don't think you've changed much.

are you gonna marry, kiss, or kill me?

i don't believe in good luck now that i know what's what.

all that time you were throwing punches, i was building something.

i know i'm just repeating myself.

fuck 'em, it's over.

little did you know, your home's really only a town you're just a guest in.

i wanna kill him.

i forget if this was ever fun.

love's never lost when perspective is earned.

you didn't measure up in any measure of a man.

my friends used to play a game where we would pick a decade we wished we could live in instead of this.

if you want to tear my world apart just say you've always wondered.

what we thought was for all time, was momentary.

do that impression you did of your dad again.

you see i was a debutant in another life but now i seem to be scared to go outside.

you just watched it happen.

so if you want to break my cold, cold heart, say you loved me.

what a charming saturday.

they tried to warn him about her.

then say they didn't do it to hurt me, but what if they did?

i just don't understand.

i was a functioning alcoholic 'till nobody noticed my new aesthetic.

no one asks any questions here.

my friends said it isn't right to be scared.

now i want to sell my house and set fire to all my clothes.

were you making fun of me with some esoteric joke?

you'll find someone.

old habits die screaming.

i know he's crazy but he's the one i want.

did you sleep with a gun underneath our bed?

fuck you if i can't have us.

we were blind to unforeseen circumstances.

i wish i could un-recall how we almost had it all.

trust me, i can handle me a dangerous man.

you're the loss of my life.

i cry a lot, but i am so productive.

who's afraid of little old me?

it was legendary.

i keep recalling things we never did.

i still ponder what it meant.

and who's gonna know you, if not me?

you wouldn't last an hour in the asylum where they raised me.

i'm just mad as hell 'cause i loved this place.

your words are still just ringing in my head.

the story isn't mine anymore.

i'm lonely, but i'm good.

i tried to warn you about them.

fresh out the slammer, i know who my first call will be to.

i look in people's windows.

i will never lose my baby again.

looking backwards might be the only way to move forward.

i choose you and me religiously.

i got cursed like eve got bitten.

i would've died for your sins, instead i just died inside.

well, me and my ghosts, we had a hell of a time.

life was always easier on you than it was on me.

you don't get to tell me about "sad".

i'm not a donor but i'd give you my heart if you needed it.

do you hate me?

you don't get to tell me you feel bad.

i was supposed to be sent away, but they forgot to come and get me.

if i'd been there, i'd hate it.

stay away from her.

i can do it with a broken heart.

you cinephile in black and white.

were you sent by someone who wanted me dead?

but what about your quiet treason?

i hoped you'd return.

i took the miracle move-on drug, the effects were temporary.

i can take the upper hand and touch your body.

i'd rather burn my whole life down than listen to one more second of all this bitching and moaning.

oh, what a way to die.

i'll tell you one thing honey, i can tell when somebody still wants me.

this place made me feel worthless.

my husband is cheating.

my beloved ghost and me.

i keep finding his things in drawers.

did you take all my old clothes?

even if it's handcuffed, i'm leaving here with you.

i'm so obsessed with him, but he avoids me like the plague.

no, i'm not coming to my senses.

we've already done it in my head.

that's the closest i've come to my heart exploding.

no matter what i've done, it wouldn't matter anyway.

everyone knows that my mother is a saintly woman but she used to say she wished that you were dead.

sometimes i wonder if you're gonna screw this up with me.

good boy, that's right.

let it once be me.

lights, camera, bitch, smile.

it's hell on earth to be heavenly.

i'm runnin' back home to you.

one bad seed kills the garden.

i've been doing it since he left.

they say what doesn't kill you makes you aware, what happens if it becomes who you are?

i was tame, i was gentle till the circus life made me mean.

the hospital was a drag, worst sleep that i ever had.

oh, here we go again.

we learned the right steps to different dances.

i haven't come around in so long.

god save the most judgmental creeps who say they want what's best for me.

'cause i'm a real tough kid, i can handle my shit.

i'll tell you how i've been there too, and that none of it matters.

i'm having his baby.

once i fix me, he's gonna miss me.

no, you can't come to the wedding.

you swore that you loved me, but where were the clues?

but you should've seen him when he first got me.

i'm sure i can pass this test.

they tried to warn you about me.

come close, i'll show you heaven if you'll be an angel all night.

what if i told you i'm back?

i'm there most of the year 'cause i hate it here.

i may never open up the way i did for you.

you left your typewriter at my apartment.

oh, we must stop meeting like this.

scandal does funny things to pride.

tell me 'bout the first time you saw me.

it's gonna be alright, i did my time.

and for a fortnight there we were forever.

i thought it was just goodbye for now.

i love you, it's ruining my life.

i'm not trying to exaggerate, but i think i might die if it happened.

i might just die, it would make no difference.

i'll forget you, but i'll never forgive.

a greater woman stays cool, but i howl like a wolf at the moon.

a greater woman wouldn't beg.

pick your poison, babe.

i died on the altar waiting for the proof.

can we watch our phantoms like watching wild horses?

i don't even want you back, i just want to know.

they'll say i'm nuts if i talk about the existence of you.

way to go, tiger.

were you a sleeper cell spy?

you are bloodthirsty.

you said i needed a brave man, then proceeded to play him until i believed it too.

someone told me there's no such thing as bad thoughts.

i can fix him, no really i can.

you needed me, but you needed drugs more.

thought of calling ya, but you won't pick up.

who do i have to speak to about if they can redo the prophecy?

you're in terrible danger.

i want to snarl and show you just how disturbed this has made me.

you are what you did.

fuck it, i was in love.

for a moment, i knew cosmic love

you're the new god we're worshipping.

you gotta fake it 'till you make it, and i did.

i wanna kill her.

did you think i had in me?

you said normal girls were "boring".

and who's gonna hold you like me?

no one here's to blame.

even statues crumble if they're made to wait.

you can mark my words that i said it first.

one last souvenir from my trip to your shores

i'm so depressed, i act like it's my birthday every day.

how can i be guilty as sin?

you were gone by the morning.

i'm always drunk on my own tears, isn't that what they all said?

he said he'd love me all his life.

who else decodes you?

fuck it if i can't have him.

i just learned these people try and save you 'cause they hate you.

tell me all that you'd learned.

you're an animal.

you already know, babe.

growing up precocious sometimes means not growing up at all.

i loved your hostile takeovers.

you and i go from one kiss to getting married.

[silverstagspirit]

How do you feel about Yuu dying triggering grim's overblot.

Yuu doesn't even die by another overblot.A lot of students don't believe Yuu and grim deserve to be at NRC, along with grim being a bit of an asshole (like everyone else).

Maybe some dudes were talking shit to grim and Yuu.Yuu having better shit to do just tried to walk off but grim having to get the last word.Called them barley a mage to worried about a human and monster showing them up.

One of the boys decided to aim a spell towards grim but since he was on your shoulders,you easily pulled him by his ribbon down into your arms.Sadly your neck wasn't so lucky, cutting deep enough into your artery.

Grim was shouting at them saying they missed, until he felt warm liquid on his fur.Turning up he was surprised he didn't know humans bleed that much,you could bleed that much.

He's seen you hurt before he started to worry when you dropped and fell over on your knees.

"Yuu please,Yuu keep your eyes open please don't leave me"

Hrk... grhh..

"Grim. I'm scared, " Yuu said with tears in their eyes.

"Please don't leave me!"

The other students were horrified at what they had done. They began to flee. But some stayed, frozen to the spot. Unable to look away or do anything.

Yuu was holding their neck to block the cut. But the blood kept flowing. They were on the ground now, fearing for their very life. They fought the black spots invading their vision when all of sudden it got very calm. They no longer felt scared.

Yuu stopped moving. Which made Grim go into a panicking frenzy.

"YUU!!! STAY WITH ME!!"

"I can hear them...."

"What?! Hear who?!"

"My family... They're calling me... They're telling me to come home."

The other dormleaders had shown up by now, and they, too, were horrified by the scene and what Yuu was saying.

"Thank you... Grim-sama"

"NOO!!! DON'T GO!!!!!"

"Goodbye...Grim"

"NOOOOOO!!!!"

Blot started dripping from Grim's crystal like a leaky faucet. Just like his tears and snot.

Everyone tried to calm Grim down, but he wouldn't let anyone get close. He had lost his other half, and he said it was all the boys' fault that Yuu had died. Which was, in a way, true.

Grim started firing fireball after fireball at everyone who tried to get near. To the point where his crystal was completely black and his body began to change. He was now a giant chimera. Protecting Yuu's body. No matter how much magic the boys threw at Grim, he would crush them with his attacks.

No one knew of Grims power until now. But now they realized how badly they've messed up.

[adropofelixir]

𝒕𝒆𝒍𝒍 𝒎𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕 𝒎𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒈𝒐 - 𝒎𝒂𝒕𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒐 𝒓𝒊𝒅𝒅𝒍𝒆

𝙥𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜(𝙨): mattheo riddle x fem! reader

𝙨𝙪𝙢𝙢𝙖𝙧𝙮: when a girl with a consuming mental illness meets the boy with the immense childhood trauma, toxicity arises between their relationship. there's already enough communicational issues between the two of you, but somehow, everything always manages to get worse.

𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨: TOXIC! reader, mentions of borderline personality disorder (i'm writing from my personal experiences with it), reader and mattheo are in their fifth year at hogwarts, self-sabotage, crude language, lots of yelling, very angsty, let me know if i missed anything!

𝙖𝙪𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙧'𝙨 𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙚: this fic is going to have a few triggering ideologies and themes to it, please DO NOT continue on if you are not comfortable with the subject matter. as someone with the disorder that i am writing about, i will not tolerate any hate speech or assumptions being made about the disorder itself, please be kind and head the warning that although this is fiction, this disorder is very real and something a lot of people deal with. feel free to send me suggestions for writings! much love, lea.

ִ ࣪𖤐.ᐟ

daphne.

the one name you thought you could go one day without hearing, and yet here it comes to haunt you once again. she's become a recurring theme being mentioned in the same sentence with your boyfriend.

she's just tutoring him. he needs help with his studies.

it couldn't drive you any more crazy than it already was. it just had to be her, didn't it? the girl everyone in the entirety of your bloody magic school thought was breathtaking.

it took a lot for you to accept being with someone like mattheo. he's more than just conventionally attractive, and you knew that before you had even caught his eye. between his undeniable good looks, his sultry voice every other girl including you gets to hear, and his mannerisms, it's not a secret that he drives almost every girl in the school mad.

with all of this being a factor in your every day life, knowing that she's his tutor couldn't bother you more. he has tried to tell you that he's not interested, and his old habits aren't a problem in your relationship as he had made the effort to change for you, but it does nothing to calm the rage boiling under your skin.

you're sitting in the library, theodore at your side as you both try to focus on your potions project that's due within the next few weeks. his focus is undivided on all of the notes he took earlier that day, meanwhile your eyes burn holes into the bookshelf that barely manages to hide her body sitting awfully close to mattheo's.

"you know, one of these days, you might kill her with your stare." the voice breaks you out of the trance you found yourself falling into, snapping your head to meet the familiar italian's eyes as you looked at him with furrowed brows.

"what are you on about?" there was attitude abundantly clear in your voice.

he gestures with his quill towards the pair that sit three rows ahead of you two before his eyes find yours again, "daphne. she's just helping him study, y/n. you know how important grades have become to him since his argument with his father over summer."

"he cares that much that he could ask her instead of his own girlfriend?" you snapped, staring at theodore with fire behind your eyes.

his lips purse together, just nodding to acknowledge your feelings as he didn't want to anger you further. "don't worry about the project for a couple days, i'll handle it and get it set up. just, don't drive yourself bloody crazy with obsessing over if she has a crush on him or not." he parted ways with you after finishing his statement.

you thought getting away would help, so you grabbed your own bag that remained unpacked the entirety of your study session, before making your way out of the library. you were sure to shove daphne's shoulder on the way out before you made your way up to your dormitory.

you looked at pansy and smiled a tight smile. pansy, knowing what's going on just by the look in your eyes, is quick to sit up and give you her full undivided attention.

"does she have to be such a bitch and be so close to him all the time? it's pathetic really, how badly she wants his fucking attention."

her response is in a softer tone than yours, almost comforting, "i can agree, she does get awfully close, but you don't need to worry about that y/n. mattheo's with you, and every since he's met you he's been wrapped around your finger."

"that doesn't mean that she can't reel him in if she starts acting like a whore." that comment was uncalled for, you knew it was deep down, but your emotions weren't allowing you to calm down.

pansy almost hissed at the vulgar word you chose, before hearing the door being fumbled with as her eyes watched mattheo enter your shared dorm room.

"i'm going to hope that i didn't hear what i think you just said." his eyes are locked on yours as he stands in front of you.

your eyes roll quickly. pansy, sensing the argument brew, is quick to make her exit to give you both some privacy.

"here you go, fucking defending her once again." your tone is laced in venom, knowing that if you hear about her one more time you're certain you'll want to take care of her yourself.

"i will defend someone who hasn't done a single thing wrong yet she's being called a name like that. she hasn't flirted with me once, nor has she touched me in any way, y/n we haven't even brushed hands or shoulders. she's just tutoring me."

"yeah, she's tutoring you right? on a subject that i'm higher than her in the class? sure thing mattheo, try to convince me you didn't go to her because you found her hot."

you knew his reasoning for wanting to be tutored by her instead of you; the two of you were inseparable. mattheo wanted your relationship to work out, and he knew in order to do that, he had to retire old habits. one of them included being codependent on each other for everything.

however, when it comes to you, you rely on him to function properly. it's far from healthy, but what can you do to control it? absolutely nothing. you were helpless. you didn't want to act like this, you wanted to be normal. you didn't want to need him around you at all times in order to feel secure in your relationship.

"you know that's far from the truth, y/n. the photos of you i've painted are littered in my notebook, if i was letting her tutor me so i could be around her due to her looks, i wouldn't keep those in there. that's common sense."

his words weren't helping calm you down, in fact, those were your breaking point. before you knew it, you were attacking him.

"then take out the fucking photos mattheo. take out the photos, go on your fucking study dates with her in her skimpy little fucking outfits, and let her take up your time. i'm clearly never going to be enough for you and that's final. i'm done wasting my time with someone who needs another person despite already having a girlfriend. get out."

his eyes scanned your face with utter disbelief. he knew you had episodes, but you had never told him to get out or that you felt like your time was wasted with him. his heart was hurting, and he needed space. without another word, just a singular nod of his head, he opened the door and left.

ִ ࣪𖤐.ᐟ

it's been days since you and mattheo have spoken. you're going crazy, and you knew you more than likely had blown your chance. you didn't mean for any of it to happen that way. you didn't understand why you had grown into such an awful person, let alone partner.

you haven't gotten out of bed in what felt like ages. you could be another year older, for all you knew. you had told him you felt like your time was wasted.

fuck.

it never was. time with him was the only thing that kept you sane. him being around you made your senses heightened and feel like you were on cloud nine. he was the love of your life, there was no doubting that.

all he's ever tried to do was love you. yet, you blew it by acting like he's against you, as if he's your enemy. you never got the chance to open up and tell him what was wrong. every time the conversation would come up you'd go into an episode by creating false narratives as to what his response could end up being.

none of this was how it was supposed to go. you weren't supposed to push him away. you weren't supposed to ruin this.

but, that's all you ever seemed to do.

mattheo had retired his usual ways just for you to give him a chance. he had confided in you numerous times about how you've become his safety net, especially due to his upbringing. he never trusted anyone the way he trusted you.

now, you were sure you had blown everything up.

there was a soft knock at your door. you were so caught up in your mind that you almost didn't hear it. you opened your mouth to speak, your voice sounding hoarse as you haven't used it in days.

"it's open." the sound level of your voice is almost at a whisper, but you can't muster to get the energy for it to be any louder.

the door slowly creaks open, illuminating your dark room with a sliver of light as the person squeezes in through the doorway.

"hi, love."

your heart stops beating, your body freezes, goosebumps arise on your skin at the sound of his voice. it can't be him right? surely, you're mistaken.

you sit up as you look at him. "mattheo?" your voice is breaking as you speak his name, your eyes turning doe-like as your hopes rise.

he steps closer so that way he comes into your view, a sad smile adorning his features. his head tilts softly as he takes in all of your features, and fuck does he take his sweet ass time doing so.

the words start spilling out of you before you can control yourself. tears are rushing down your face as if they were running a marathon for a prize.

"i'm so, so fucking sorry matty. i don't know why i say the things that i do. i don't want to be this way. i want to be normal. you don't deserve to be treated like that. i don't want to be another burden in your life, i'm so sorry-"

his voice cuts in through yours, "pansy explained everything to me, you don't have to apologize. you can't control any of it, i know."

your lip quivers as you stare at him, his eyes full of understanding which makes you start sobbing uncontrollably. your hands cover your face as you sob into them, feeling warm arms wrap around you as he pulls you onto his lap when he sits down next to you.

"i-i thought i blew it.."

"shhh, we're okay, everything's okay. i would never leave you. i just needed you to talk to me, love. that way i can understand you and what you need during your episodes."

his fingers push your messy hair behind your ear as you peek up at him, your face now puffy and pink from your tears.

"i don't mean to be difficult, i'm sorry you have to deal with all of this."

a smirk finds his lips now, as he takes in your apologetic state. "now, now, where's the fun in dating if you can't keep me on my toes every now and then?" he kisses your forehead before he finishes, "i love you, y/n. no amount of arguments is going to change that."

you felt like you can breathe once again as he pulls you even closer, laying down with you wrapped up in his limbs. his gentle voice hums your favorite song as he plays with your hair, trying to soothe your nerves and help you get rest. your eyes are fluttering shut before you can notice, and your breathing mellows out as he smiles contently down at you.

"off to sleep you go, pretty girl. see you in the morning."

ִ ࣪𖤐.ᐟ

𝙨𝙚𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙙 𝙖𝙪𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙧'𝙨 𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙚: hello again! i haven't proof-read this, as i'm currently sick while writing it! i may come back and edit it if need be, but i hope you enjoyed this angsty attempt at displaying one of many examples of living with borderline personality disorder in a relationship. i can't wait to come back and write again! i love you all!