#// im goinf to. stop here. my god i cant stop talking good night good day good afternoon

[baekhvuns]

hi sunbaenim! am back to tell u everything in detail bc i sent the last asks when i was sleep drunk right b4 goinf to bed. here it goes:

1. my roomie and one of the best friends i have since we moved in together last year due to college dated a guy for ~3 years until february when he broke up w her (important info: he goes to the same uni we do, started studying here bc of her influence. i knew him and we had a somewhat strong friendship, we used to talk a lot ab our insecurities and all. he said he adored me all the time). she got extremely sad bc she loved him a lot and even thought she'd marry him at some point. it was v difficult for me seing her so down. in march, we were talking and she asked me what my thoughts were ab some situations that happened between them when they dated and with what i said she realized she was abused. she went to talk w him ab this and at first he seemed sorry and all. but last month a friend of ours told us this guy tried to justify his abuse with something ridiculous and disgustimg im not even mentioning here AND ALSO SAID I WAS THE ONE WHO "PUT IDEAS" IN MY ROOMIE'S HEAD??????? i turned into the ex' crazy friend so he wouldnt be the one to blame, u know? then my roomie had to talk to him in private some days after we discovered that and she had to call me to "rescue" her bc he was saying the most violent things to her... i got there and i started to reply the whole MENINIST NONSENSE he was saying to her and to me at that point and in the end we said we didnt want any type of contact w him. me and my roomie got v emotionally unstable due to all of this, but now shes finally free and we're already better.

2. my roomie went for a trip and accidentally got bugs in the luggage she's taken to that trip so our apartament got infestated w them when she came back :D we had to fumigate (is this the right word) it all last week, spent a night out so the substances wouldnt poison us and in the next day spent 6/7 hours cleaning and putting all back in place. it was hell.

2.5 i kinda got a could the following day after we cleaned it all and i absolutely hate to be sick. :D

3. 2 days after having our apartment bug free, there was a fire in our building? and its very windy were we live so the fire could spread fast. roomie was in uni but i was at home and i had to be through the entire fire bc the smoke could get me sick (even more, bc i had a cold, remember?) if i tried to get out of here. fortunately it all went well, but we had no electricity until 8pm, and the fire started around 2pm.

tea spilled. thats has been my life happenings for the last 2 months. im putting my life together again now even though it has been looking like a sitcom ou smth... pls somebody tell god im not his strongest soldier i cant handle being tested anymore

-hoobae anon

HELLO!! IM ALREADY CRYING 😭😭

1. oH HE DID NOT?????? OH MY GOD FBWKDHWK HE IS SO???? not the menist oh lord 😭😭😭 HOW DID UR FRIEND EVEN LIKE HIM FHWJDHWK IM SO GLAD U SHUT HIM DOWN OH I CAN JUST IMAGE IT ANON 🫡🫡🫡🫡 ok but like the communication between u and ur friend??? top tier everyone need a friend like u

justify. abuse. electric chair.

2. STOP THIS IS A NIGHTMARE PLS WHAT THE FUCK I WISH U WOULD SEE MT FACE RN FBWNDJQK OH THIS NASTY 😭😭😭

3. fight, bugs and now fire. anon, idk the right terms but i know u gotta cleanse or sage yourself bECAUSE HELLO????? NAAAHHHH THE EVIL EYE GOT U, U GOTTA DO SOME JUJU

tea spilled, i screamed, no ur right this is like a sitcom like i can imagine the laugh tracks after u find yourself in a situation 😭😭😭 crying this is so chaotic but i guess it’s a story to tell in the future!!! im glad ur safe i hope the concert will be good tooo!!!!!

[m0e-ru]

Throughout writing the GSA SL AU, what has been your favorite part(s) of it to flesh out? Also, what drew you to Izanami as a character, what made you want to expand on them to write your AU? I think I've seen you talk about why in passing, though Bad Memory makes it to remember so sorry if you have explained that before.

I was going through my analysis tag and called myself so smart and maybe I am glad for my dramatic writing to make lore sound so pish poshy . also it's okay !!! if you don't remember . if the social anxiety I am a multilingual mess of a chatterbox who will say the same thing over and over again like a broken record but maybe multiple copies of the same record just warped differently . does that make sense. my english teachers have told me I need to work on my summary writing and I don't think I improved <3 anywho cracks knuckles. also happy 1.3k words

gsaslau........ my favorite was.... everything. the world building, the lore, the characters, mental flowcharts and concept maps. canon divergency has always been my favorite, paired with the fact I love analysing shit in the first place. I took one look at this idiot and saw all the pitiful overlooked potential hiding in their dumb oil scented uniform and tried to rip it out and put it in centrifuges and stretching it out as far as possible. people think I'm out of dough but I'm a little menace with a squirrel living inside my brain who just adds more dough. I will get a Thought and sit in a discord chat and monopolize it while literally everyone else is asleep because of the concept of timezones and I type for three hours and pass out; for an afternoon nap or the fact it became 3am.

iznmi is just sooooooo. barren. an absolute blank slate but also they're not. they're unpolished and deliberately dirtied. maybe theyre so empty and I have to take them to literal puddles and make sure every drop of whatever makes them at least half full in a sense. they're the puddle and I dug out a lake with a toy shovel. under all those layers I know there's nothing. but there's also something. there's a corpse. an actual person. an answer. a question. a migraine that would torment me for a week maybe.

a tiny tiny bit of context, before entering uh. here. the p4 community or if im ever actually considered to be part of it, I came from a humble little community where everyone was friends (ninokuni). I did my fair share of analysis and canon divergency and expressed my fear for bigger communities for mainstream media. so when i got here I decided to stay in this hole. this ditch. quarry mine. reminiscent of patrick star's house. I thought it'd be the same but NO. I fight tooth and nail in my own house and welcome people selectively like I'm a rabid animal sniffing people left and right. anyway

ummmm twirls hair swings legs. gsaslau origin story patreon special. i was obsessed with the dumb voiced npc at the start of the game the jp dub made him sound so fruity and my dad and sister and I joked around how he was a vampire for shits and kept making absurd headcanons throughout playing. the fact they showed up only on rainy days only made them more sketchy. in fact I could've casually liked this moron without the whole 'I'm god actually' bullshit going on.

I watched visualive! it was the end for me. no literally my brain was hardwired so badly I knew from that point on i would never be a normal p4 fan ever. adachis chair car adventure. THE END OF IT ALL.

D'OH I was obsessed. why was adachis clown ass acting like this. he's never like this. why has this been the only guy shown to piss him off ever. DONT get me started with th attendant I was sitting there 'NO WAYYY NO FUCKING WAYYYYYYY SO THIS GUY IS SIGNIFICANT IN ONE (1) OFFICIAL MEDIA.?' i was spiraling

I finished the game and that did Not help my conscience. I entered the fandom at that point and had my darkest days. but I learned a lot from it and I'm grateful for that

I was nitpicking EVERYTHING. I was asking so much questions and I had so much fun answering them. then coming back a year later with so much more answers, or maybe debunk my own views with something more enlightening I had to write my revelations while brushing my teeth after a shower. interpreting was great connecting dots were thrilling. the "what if" questions went too far and started. this (gsaslau) WHICH technically started when I watched vl and it hit me full force once I actually started thinking about it.

to me there was just. so much to do with the god and their humansona you don't understand. the fact they're intertwined with lore so much you had to check every nook and cranny and go mad while at it? then again that was a win win for me since I was basically picking at media analysis too.

I was there.... brute forcing translation as a non native. cracking into the game trying to find SOMETHING. I was buying books i couldn't read for One (1) page of trivia in a small little box with less than a paragraph. I went through spinoffs games and novels and drama cds and stageplays and art books and magazines and interviews and livestreams and blog posts and tweets. I was learning so much as time went by and i had so many new pieces I could tinker with and create completely new machinations I would adore.

I drew art comics wrote fic and analysis and wiki articles I edited pictures videos gifs modded games cracked into them for assets 3d models dialogue secret textures events I manufactured my own merch for pete's sake I gaslit so many people with fake screenshots and convincing formats and i wish i could do that again

okay kinda segued there I'll try and go back. my favorite to flesh out was... world building? dealing with the butterfly affect and figuring out the consequences in this and seeing how the story change would make me so excited. maybe souji wouldn't want to kill namatame on the spot and his vision would stay foggy because he can't accept the truth that some of the people he's friends with are those who started this citywide crisis. maybe adachi does care about people and realizes his feelings and decides to abandon his fake life he started for the sake of his loved ones so they wouldn't get hurt again. maybe namatame was a bit happier after the trauma of someone leaving him and more mentally stable and took care of nanako well that he's earned her trust and does his best not to break that loyalty ever. making parallels like marie and mim being one and the same and so different at the same time. MAYBE god develops humanity within themself after being so convinced they couldn't and has conflicting morals between their duty and their wants as their own person. exploring the possible relationships are also high up there like souji and namatame being friends or nanako scaring a gas station attendant twice her size. adachi and mim's friendship is a given.

iznmi canon or not, they just have....so so much potential and the fact they're lore itself doesn't help. and I think it's fucking hilarious you can finish the game knowing NOTHING about them. at all. what if there was more to this silly npc who only appears during a rainy weather flag..... vl sparked too many ideas. what if god had a bit more screentime in that personality that we could see their thought process some more while they observe the protagonist's journey throughout the entire game. the realization they hey, maybe humans' Shadows won't kill them one day. maybe they'll have the strength to stop denying themselves and accept them to achieve a greater power.

okay maybe this is enough rambling or i show you my two years worth of discord messages and scattered google docs . thank you for asking. hugs and kisses . and remember: gas staion atednat