#// ic things that make me think of jongin's album ?

[technicallymilkshakes]

Reciprocal ❂ || 1 of 2

A Manager!verse story Genre(s): Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Smut (in future chapter) Pairing: Jongin x Reader Word Count: 4.1k No warnings for this chapter, but note that the next one will contain mature content.

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Less than two hours outside of Seoul, the night air already seemed easier to breathe. The windows were open and a rain-scented breeze blew in to riffle the top of your hair. Brake lights reflected red on the slick roadside ahead of you before fracturing into ten thousand raindrops against the windshield. This was a Friday night kind of feeling. You felt reckless and emotional, free for the first time in months and brimming with life.

Jongin had told you that he would halfsy the drive. Instead, he was deep asleep in the passenger seat, head slumped sideways, shoes kicked off within minutes of entering the vehicle. Promotions had been particularly brutal this time around. Without the other members to help ease the burden, Kai had to be on at all times. He was charming and dorky and witty—he flourished under all the attention—but it came with a toll. You scheduled PT sessions in any brief moments of respite you could cram then in. He slept wherever and whenever he could and when he couldn't, he drank coffee.

Running point for this solo had been just as taxing for you. Time moved in recordings, photoshoots, and appearances. You'd fall asleep and wake up reviewing the itinerary. Promotions were occurring across a variety of platforms and you spent countless hours researching and breaking down offers, liaising with event managers and security, monitoring press reviews and social media. You were in so deep, you didn't even realize you weren't living until someone else pointed it out. Nine, Baekhyun's manager, encouraged both of you to take a vacation. Pronto. Their experience shepherding Baekhyun through multiple solo albums had been invaluable, so you weren't about to argue.

Besides, you hadn't been to the mountains since your first year of high school.

It had stopped raining by the time you pulled up to your destination. Jongin was already awake, blinking heavily at the sight that greeted him.

The mountain lodge was modern but inviting. The lights were on and they spilled pleasantly out into the night. You turned the car off and stepped out into chilled air enlivened with the sounds of leaves rustling, insects chirping, and nocturnal animals stirring.

Inside, golden wood warmed the open space. The retreat was divided into two levels—living/dining area and one bedroom on the first floor and the master bedroom with a balcony that would be rich with fresh vegetables in the summer on the second.

You looked out on the living room. The designer had impeccable taste. Plush seating with cushions and pillows in sumptuous fabrics curled around a fireplace. Your toes sank into lush, layered carpeting, which bracketed and defined the space. It was comfortable and intimate. You could easily imagine yourself sinking into a chair and nestling in for a nap, lulled into a trance by the fire.

The kitchen gleamed in the opposite corner, all straight lines and modern appliances. And the dining area next to it. Table and chairs had been regally arranged in front of wall-to-wall sliding glass doors that, for now, looked out onto darkness.

But there was one particular feature that had clinched the deal when you booked the place.

“There's a spa bath here,” you said, and suppressed a smile at the soft 'ooh' Jongin let out as he disappeared to investigate.

A quietness settled over you in his wake. There was no wifi here, no work to haunt your waking nor sleeping hours. The other managers were under strict orders not to contact you unless there was an emergency.

You felt oddly vulnerable, stripped of the last vestiges of responsibility holding you together. Listless and exhausted, you climbed upstairs and fell into bed without a thought for anything else.

**

You woke early the next morning, body too used to being tired. You stared at the ceiling for an indeterminable time, thoughts eddying around without any clear distinction, like static noise that only resolved itself into proper words when you concentrated.

You'd been managing Kai for almost five years now. Hard to believe. You loved this, the sense of belonging and the endless opportunities to learn, but the pace was grueling. Five years was a long time. You couldn't imagine how some of the older managers had kept up. You weren't sure how you had kept up. And, if you were being honest, you weren't sure anymore if you should.

But that was too much thinking for this early in the morning. You rolled over in bed and shut your eyes.

After the appropriate amount of indeterminable time had passed, you heaved yourself out of bed. Sleep wasn't coming back for you. Duvet wrapped around your shoulders, you slinked downstairs to find Jongin rummaging around in the cabinets. He spun around, flinching as a drawer clanged shut behind him, then relaxed.

“You too, huh?” he said with a lopsided grin.

You nodded.  It was no surprise to find him here. You were just two bodies too accustomed to being together.

You turned your gaze to the counters. “What are you doing?”

“I was trying to make some coffee.”

He looked wan and tired. One armed wrapped around his middle, the collar of his shirt sunk low enough to expose his collarbones... like he was holding himself together, trying to stay warm.

A sense of fierce protectiveness overcame you. You were both overworked. But at least in this small bubble, this moment in time and space, nothing could hurt him, including himself. No work excuses allowed.

“That sounds like a disaster waiting to happen,” you said, and he gave a weak laugh before getting an armful of duvet shoved at him. “Go sit down, I'll bring it over.”

Jongin stood there a moment staring at you. Under-cabinet lighting slashed over his chest, the rest of him slipping into shadow before he disappeared completely as he pulled the duvet over your head.

You felt a light kick to your backside.

“Hey!” You wrestled with the duvet. “As soon as I get out of this thing...!”

But he was grinning at you when you finally pulled it off, and you felt your urge for vengeance abate far too quickly as your fatigue flared. You still punched him in the shoulder, though.

He pouted, rubbing his shoulder.

“Oh, don't give me those puppy dog eyes. You deserved it.”

“I can make coffee...”

“You can,” you agreed. “With adult supervision. Now get the kettle out.”

**

The sunrise was something pulled from a poet's imagination. The lodge perched along a low ridge and peered down into the valley. Jongin had pulled open the curtains to what only last night had looked out into darkness and now found the world at his door. Together, you watched as the sun spilled over the mountain peaks opposite, then glissaded down powdery slopes to the tree line. The trees across the valley, where the mountains were taller, were still snowcapped, and the first sun rays lit them up like jewelry before setting them aflame with light, their trunks like matchsticks to the fire. Shadows tucked themselves in to sleep at the feet of the brightest places.

Day woke and stretched its radiant fingers across the sky to tangle in the wingtips of greeting birds. And with the sun came some clarity. These last few months had tested your commitment and shaken the bedrock upon which you had built your future. But if everyday the birds could rise and welcome the the newborn morning so lovingly, you thought you could keep trying to find beauty in it, too.

Next to you, Jongin had fallen asleep wrapped in your duvet. You leaned over and tucked his toes in.

**

The village was quaint and small, situated on a scenic one-lane-each-way route that wound through the mountains. The cashier at the grocery store greeted you as you entered. You felt her eyes on your back as you moved through the store.

The cabin came stocked with various dry foods, but you needed to pick up the perishables. Most of the in-season vegetables and fruit had been grown in the area, with little signs detailing farms and their locations. Strawberries, kumquat, apples, wild parsley and chive, and even shepherd's purse laying in baskets, some of which had been foraged from the mountainside just this morning. There was a vibrant freshness to the produce here that you just couldn't find in the city.

You gathered everything you needed, taking no heed of diet restrictions or nutritional value, and went to ring up your purchases. The cashier gave you small smile and talked quietly of some of the hidden gems to visit around here, hands sweeping back and forth over the scanner as she spoke. She had a soft and lilting accent you found pleasant to listen to.

You hid your embarrassment. Was it that obvious you were from out of town? She probably knew from the moment you had stepped inside. Heck, you hadn't worried about fitting in for so long. Over the years, your accent had eroded away against standard Korean and harsh edges of the city. And the boys had been so welcoming. At least she was friendly, though. Soon enough, you were hauling your bags out to the car, but not before thanking the woman for her advice.

**

Jongin was still lying on the couch when you got back, barely awake. Two cold mugs of coffee lay abandoned on the table next to him, one still nearly full. He sat up when you walked in with the bags, frowning.

“You went shopping?”

You heard the missing “without me?” and gave him a calm look. “You were asleep and I needed something to eat for lunch.”

He gathered himself up with a frown, wrapping the duvet around himself just as you had this morning. It already felt like a day ago even though it couldn't be past 11 in the morning. He inspected the bags, pulling them open and poking through them. You watched with amusement between putting the contents of the already-poked-through-bags away.

“What are you, a dog?”

“You got pig bars?!” He pulled out the ice cream, the item cradled in his palms. He looked at you wide-eyed, some mixture of reverence and fright.

“Yes. No chicken either.”

He kept staring down at his hands and you chuckled awkwardly to fill the silence. He opened the ice bar and jumped up onto the counter.

As you put the groceries away and then began making soy bean soup with the shepherd's purse, Jongin remained quiet and watchful. You enjoyed living alone back in Seoul, but you found you didn't mind his company. His presence was comforting—a constant, quiet companion. Not a dog, then. Your lips quirked. A cat.

The kitchen filled with the beat of knife against cutting board, the melody of soft burbling from the pot on the stove. You found yourself slipping back into the rhythm of cooking, like a dancer remembering the steps to an old song.

“What song is that?”

You startled, knife slipping, nicking the knuckle of your middle finger. You hissed, dropping the knife to inspect the cut. “Shit. What?”

Jongin jumped down from the counter, grabbing your hand, apologies tripping themselves over his lips.

“It's fine, it's really shallow, don't worry about it.”

His grip tightened, and his head remained bent low over your hand, examining the cut. “Let me worry,” he said.

So you sat in muteness after washing the cut. He took your hands and dried them with a towel, soft pats and delicate swipes. His eyes would flick up to your face now and again, carefully observing your expression. Sometimes, you would catch him doing it. His lips would arc gently into a smile and you would look away, scalded by the softness of lips and eyes. You stared instead at his fingers. They moved as light as butterflies over you as he applied a bandage.

Jongin lifted himself away, a lightness to his shoulders.

The words cast themselves from your throat, thrown out like hooks, that old part of you reeling to keep his attention.

“Thank you.”

Something glittered behind that gaze. He looked you straight on with that smile like honey and said, “I was glad for the chance to take care of you.”

**

After lunch, you went straight up to your room, sank onto your bed, and stared blankly at the wall.

What was that? Your mind sped in a circuit, thoughts looping back on each other. Why'd he do that?

Surely your brain had short-circuited. He was like that with everyone, you reminded yourself, sweet and concerned. The type to ask a stranger how they're doing and stick around for an answer. But without the barrier of work, things felt different. It dredged up old feelings, back when you were half-way in love with him. It embarrassed you something fierce now, but in the beginning you used to make a playlist of all the songs you knew he listened to. You'd play it at night after work, lying in bed in the dark and wondering if right now, he wasn't doing the same. It made you long for him and feel closer to him all at once. You always paid Kim Jongin too much attention.

But at some point, you changed your focus. You threw yourself into the role of manager head first. Taking care of him was number one. You spent so much time around him in various states of undress over the years, helping with quick changes or applying therapeutic patches. You'd stood behind the cameras, watching other people fall in with him with a smile. You'd seen him at his worst, in pain, angry and sullen with the confinement of the world. It was the ultimate form of exposure therapy. Gone were the nights filled with music and yearning. You'd prepare for the next schedule before you sank exhausted into a deep and dreamless sleep. You thought you were immune.

You should've been immune.

So why did it feel so very much like you weren't?

**

You acted skittish around him at dinner, skirting over things and racing through the meal. You felt his cool gaze on you as you ate and felt yourself hunkering lower and lower over your plate like some threatened beast.

“Did you want to take a bath?”

“What?” you squeaked.

He looked up at you over his forkful of pasta, eyebrows raised.

“The bath in my room. It's like a spa. I thought you might want to relax while you're here. You're welcome to use it anytime.”

“Oh.” You swallowed thickly. “Um, maybe later. Thanks.”

Safe to say you did not take a bath in his room that night.

**

You woke first the second day. Sleep hadn't come easy, and you spent much of the night thinking of how to stop thinking, daydreaming of a long walk to purge all thoughts from your head. And so you dressed and headed downstairs on quiet socked feet. The owner of the lodge kept galoshes for the guests, and you pulled a pair out, slipping them over your shoes before walking out into the world.

Most of the snow that remained on this side of the mountain had melted, leaving behind stretches of mud that sucked at your shoes. Around you, the birds trilled. The forest was full of forest noises—pine needles brushing against the wind, woodpeckers drilling against bark. The website for the lodge mentioned that there were a number of trails maintained by a grounds crew throughout the property. A stream bordered the western edge of the property, and you thought you remembered something about a Buddhist shrine located near there.

You missed this, you realized about a half hour into the walk. Seoul had its share of scenic parks and river walks, but it felt like a held breath. Something temporary, a quick break before you returned to the rushing arteries of people making a living.

Life felt impossibly lethargic here in contrast. You realized, with one moment of panic, that you hadn't yet checked your phone this morning, before it dissipated slowly. You were on vacation, you reminded yourself. The others could hold down the fort while you were gone.

The path you were following rounded a corner into a scenic corner of the world. A small waterfall fed by snowmelt spilled over a mossy rock face into a pool surrounded by sweet grass. You stayed there for a while by the edge, mist falling over you in fine sprays. Small diamonds of water accumulated along the woolen fibers of your sleeves.

After about 15 or 20 minutes, the urge to move was back. The trail branched off here, and a lichen-covered stone marker sat in the intersection. You recognized it as one of the landmarks the woman from the grocery had mentioned. The hanja carved into it had grown worn and faded. 'Grove of the Elders' it read. You took the path to the left.

Soon, you found yourself in the Grove of the Elders. Erman's birch trees filled the clearing. The branches were still spindly, buds just forming on the tips. Papery bark peeled away from the trunk like old men's beards. White forsythia was in the early stage of blooming along the periphery. You understood why it had been named the way it had.

You made your way through the grove. The trees were well-established, some with trunks thick enough to wrap your arms around. You were making your way through the grove, marveling at the open blue sky above you, when you almost stepped on Jongin.

“Whoa.” He jumped up from where he had been reclined against the base of a tree, rubbing a hand along the backs of his thighs. “What are you doing here?”

It was disorienting to run into him here, out in the middle of the woods. You had forgotten about him, about everything if you were being honest. But confronted with the realness of him again, your worries returned.

“Me?” you asked. “I was on a walk. What are you doing laying here?”

“I was trying to read.” He flashed a heavily dog-eared paperback of Papillon. “Didn't really get that far,” he said with a wry grin.

“Oh, sorry. I'll let you get back to it.”

You made to leave when his hand stretched out and gripped your sleeve.

“That's not what I meant.” He seemed flustered at your misunderstanding and he released his grip on you. “You don't have to. I was actually thinking about stretching my legs. If you don't mind the company.”

“I don't,” you responded quietly, even though you weren't sure if that was the truth. You had come here to be alone with your thoughts after all, not spiral into a silent panic.

Jongin smiled at you and shoved his book in the back of his jeans as he fell into step.

**

It felt surreal to walk through the woods like this with him. It was like being on the set of a music video, except you were the subject. The perfect setting for a story.

“Is it okay if I tell you something?”

Jongin sent you a questioning look. Something about his eyes caught you. You realized that this was maybe the first time you were about to confide something in him. Secrets were dangerous things.  “Yeah, of course.”

“Sometimes I wonder how much of a person I am without you.” You laughed. “It's silly, I know. But I used to be so spontaneous. One time, I volunteered to pose nude for an adult art class just because, I dunno, it seemed like an experience. I liked collecting memories. My friends always used to ask me what I was up to.

“Now, they ask me what you're doing. Because it's the same thing now, I guess.”

You exhaled, then felt a hand wrap around your own.

Jongin looked at you, really looked at you. There was a particular intensity to this, a piercing quality that you had never been subjected to.

“You are more than me,” he said.

You were taken aback at his response.

His grip tightened. “I couldn't do this without you,” he continued. “I should've told you before—but I'm not like Jongdae, I forget. I think,” he ran a hand through his hair, “I thought you already knew, but it was stupid of me too assume when I wasn't... I didn't... You're the best manager I've had. I'm not saying that just to flatter you.”

The words tumbled out of him. You'd never seen him so discombobulated, and that threw you off kilter in turn. You hadn't expected anything from him, had let go of the words like balloons released from clumsy fingers, where an appropriate response might be “oh no.”

“You're knowledgeable and accountable. Do you know how much I rely on you? I was so nervous this comeback, I only made it through because of you.” He swept your hand up to his chest. You could feel his heart beating frantically against your knuckles, like it, too, was trying to tell you something. “I do better when you're around. I want to make you proud. So get that through your stubborn brain: I wouldn't be even half of what I am now if it wasn't for you.”

The tears came, unbidden. In a heartbeat, Jongin had pulled you in close, your head against his chest. One of his arms wrapped around your back, while the other lay now at your sides, his fingers still intertwined with yours.

“I don't even know why I'm crying,” you laughed through your tears.

“You're always fighting for me. I just wish I could do more for you.” His fingers grazed over the bandage on your finger.

The laughter faded into full-throated sobs. Your heart squeezed with an uncomfortable fullness. You were overwhelmed. Lately, it had felt as if work was a crushing void, a thankless pit that sucked everything out of you. You felt isolated, living life without reciprocation or support. Jongin wouldn't know it, but he made you feel like a person again. He brought back the colors.

Dew drops dripped from branches around you, soft patters against soft spring grass. Jongin was warm and solid against you.

“I get scared that I can't do this forever.” The words were spoken softly. Jongin wasn't looking at you when you lifted your head, focused instead on something in the distance. “I don't know what I would I do without EXO.” He finally dropped his gaze to yours. You saw your own uncertainty reflected back. “Or you.”

You knew then that everything you'd been through lately, the uncertainty, didn't matter. You were both a little broken. So you pressed yourself against him harder, a pair of fractured hearts holding each other up. “You won't be getting rid of me anytime soon.”

Jongin sank into the embrace, his cheek pressed against your temple. You felt his chest build with a sigh, felt the exhale on the baby hairs of your nape. Dry lips grazed against you. His wordless thanks lingered upon your skin.

**

By some unspoken agreement, Jongin's hand remained in yours on the trek back to the lodge. You walked close enough to brush arms and skim each others thighs. A small part of you dreaded that you'd have to let go once you got back.

“The first time I realized I trusted you was when I told you I didn't know how to iron,” he confessed out of the blue.

You laughed. You remembered that day. Jongin had been adamant about wearing a bear-print shirt to the airport the following day, but it was so wrinkled. The collar pointed in two different directions and one sleeve was longer than the other unless someone held it down straight.

“I didn't know how to iron a shirt either,” you admitted.

Jongin grinned, the corners of his eyes crinkling. “We had to look up a tutorial on Naver, remember?”

“Oh yeah, the one with the Kyungsoo look-a-like, right? I took screenshots and sent them to Cho-hee.” You told him how Kyungsoo's manager had coerced him into recreating the shoot. Jongin had gasped delightedly and you made a mental note to show him the pictures when you got back. “But hey, wait, you still don't know how to iron, what the heck! I just ironed something for you last week!"

“Ah I don't know, I don't know,” Jongin chanted, plugging an ear with his free hand. “What tutorial? I don't know anything.”

“Kim Jongin, you are shameless.”

Laughter rang through the trees. Here was the morning you would rise to greet every day.

___________________________

A/N: The second, and final, chapter should be up next weekend (June 19-20). Me, releasing more than one thing in a month? Who am I??

Thank you for reading!

A/N 2: Second part is now up.

[ ❂ Read more Manager!verse here ]

[onewfantaesy]

Oh poor Taemin in MITD. I love this story so much though because it feels raw and kind of real in a way. Your writing always brings me so deeply into whatever world you have created in the best way. I'd like to see what Jongin thinks or if he acts because he seems (not surprising as Tae's bff) to be really concerned. Maybe a little bff moment?

(tw: ed)

“Taemin? Taemin!”

Jongin is looking through every room of Taemin’s house, but he can’t find him. They were supposed to have SuperM practice today, they were carpooling, but Taemin wasn’t downstairs when Jongin showed up and he wasn’t answering his phone.

The kitchen was cleaned. There’s still bags of unopened popcorn, boxes of Diet Coke, and Oreos everywhere, but the trash had been taken out and it didn’t smell weird like Taemin’s kitchen usually did, a smell that Jongin could never quite place. There was also a whiteboard in the kitchen Jongin hadn’t seen the last time he was over, but whatever had been written on it was smudged off, like it had been hastily erased.

The rest of Taemin’s house, as usual, was a mess. But Taemin wasn’t home. Jongin was starting to freak out. Then his phone dinged.

Sorry I overslept. Jinki’s dropping me off at work today. See u in a bit! 🤠

Taemin’s been using the damn cowboy emoji almost exclusively since the 100 music video came out. But Jongin put a hand to his heart and felt relieved. Taemin was with Jinki. He was okay. He didn’t need to worry.

Except as soon as Taemin walked through the door to the dance room SuperM was rehearsing in that day, Jongin was right back to worrying. Because Jinki was walking in with him, kept a careful hand on Taemin’s back the whole time, and Jongin could just see the concern radiating off of Jinki as he sat on a couch and kept a careful eye on Taemin the entire time.

“Mind your wrist,” Jinki had to remind Taemin every so often. Because Taemin’s wrist was in a brace still, he probably shouldn’t even be dancing and moving around so much, but Taemin was never one to stop working even if he was injured.

Taemin’s eyes would flash to Jinki every time he said it, and Jongin couldn’t take his eyes off of Taemin’s reflection in the mirror. He looked nervous - like he always seemed to these days - but Jinki’s presence seemed to calm him in a way Jongin hadn’t seen in a long time.

Taemin was glued to Jinki at the hip. Every break they took, Taemin was bounding to the couch Jinki was on and sitting as close as possible and taking the water bottle Jinki offered him.

“What do you want for lunch?” Jinki asks carefully, softly, but Jongin hears it. And he hears the way Taemin sucks in a quick breath, almost a gasp. Watches Taemin just barely shake his head, and then Jinki say, “You missed breakfast. So what do you want for lunch? My treat, I’ll get the same thing you get.”

“I don’t know,” Taemin whispers.

“Chicken?” Jinki suggests, pulling up menus on his phone for delivery. Taemin laughs a little and leans closer, his head dipping close to Jinki’s shoulder, but he shakes his head. “No meat today?”

Taemin shakes his head again.

“S’gross,” Taemin mumbles. “Makes my tummy hurt.”

“It’s okay,” Jinki says gently, and one his hands absentmindedly cards through Taemin’s hair as they keep searching through the different lunch options on Jinki’s phone. “We can try meat later. Tofu?”

Taemin nods, a smile tugging at his lips, and he puts a hand on Jinki’s stomach and whispers something in his ear that makes Jinki snort and Taemin giggle. Probably a tofu-leader joke, Jongin thinks. And not a very good one, given their reactions.

It’s surreal, for the SuperM members, to see Taemin so invested in what he’s going to eat for lunch. To see him be so soft and easily persuaded. Jinki must just have that effect on him, they reason. It must be a maknae-leader relationship thing.

Jinki orders food for everyone, but they do notice that he gets the exact same meal he gets for Taemin. Jongin notices the way Jinki feeds him with Taemin using the excuse that he can’t use chopsticks with his left hand, then whining that Jinki should have asked for a fork when he ordered. Notices the way it’s always one bite for Taemin, one bite Jinki, and that Taemin seems to keep count in his head. Notices the way Jinki smiles at him and encourages him to eat between conversations with everyone about SuperM’s latest album.

“I can’t,” Taemin whispers to Jinki, putting his hand on top of Jinki’s so the chopsticks are left abandoned in his half-finished food. “Please.”

“It’s okay,” Jinki smiles, and the others are already fully finished and scattered around the room talking to each other and going over choreography before practice starts back up. “We can bring it home. You don’t have to finish it all now.”

Taemin nods, and Jinki puts the top back on Taemin’s food.

That’s when Jongin remembers the question he’d had earlier that day.

“Why weren’t you at home?” Jongin asks. “Earlier?”

“I’m staying at Jinki’s for a while,” Taemin proclaims, a stupid smirk on his face as he stands up. “Because he missed me so much. Because I’m his favorite. Isn’t that right, Jinki?”

“You’re my favorite maknae.”

It makes everyone else snort and laugh, and Taemin scoffs. Jinki just smirks right back at him, but he’s laughing and it’s a teasing smirk on his face.

It somehow makes Jongin more relieved, knowing that Taemin isn’t by himself. Knowing that Jinki is keeping him in check. Knowing that Jinki would never let anything bad happen to Taemin.

Especially when, at the end of that day’s rehearsal, he watches Jinki wrap his arms around Taemin and spin him around and tease him, watches Taemin light up and laugh louder than he has in a very long time. When he hears Taemin whispers how he wants to go get ice cream on the way home, because he knows Taemin hasn’t allowed himself to eat ice cream in months under the guise of being on a diet. Laughs when he hears Jinki tell him they’ll get ice cream if Taemin finishes the rest of his lunch for dinner, watches Taemin pout like a little kid who was told he has to eat all his vegetables to get dessert. In a way, it’s endearing, seeing how Jinki just somehow knows how to handle Taemin’s weird eating habits. Jongin has never quite known how to do that.

Jongin is almost sure he’s happier than Taemin is now that Jinki is back home. It takes a weight off Jongin’s shoulders he didn’t even realize was there until it was gone.

[maximura]

SUPERM: REVIEWED

The whole genesis and roll-out of this group has been weirdly and relentlessly polarising right from the start. I had a lot of fear and mistrust at the start and like everyone else, it was pretty much a case of, “Who asked for this?!” But whatever, we might not have asked for it but we got it now so let’s review this thing.

1. JOPPING. This word is fucking awful. Jopping kinda sounds like Drop It, which would’ve been a better title for this.  Ugh. Stop trying to make this word happen, it’s not going to happen, Gretchen Weiners. But besides that, I really like it. It’s dumb kpop fun. The pre-chorus and chorus are sick. The instrumental is sick (and that intro is straight from the Avengers theme). The choreo looks great. They made the most of having like 1.5 vocalists. Reverb and stacked vocals on steroids and I dig it. Nobody is going to believe it but my favourite part is the way Jongin’s first verse slid right into Ten’s. Also, Jongin is the absolute centre of this group, the way he parted the river of kpop-minions like kpop-Moses was poetic cinema. I’d spend 40 days in the desert for him. 

2. THE MV. It’s very confusing. You can see where the budget went but at the same time, you can also see all these cheap tacky parts too. It’s a flex song that they filmed in Dubai but if they REALLY wanted to flex on ALL OF KPOP, I’d have spent the money on good lighting and a licence to film in the real colosseum in Rome. You don’t need CGI or anything. Just a sunset, some dry ice, a good lighting scheme and a camera crane. Now that would’ve been epic. Jopping is a stadium song and the MV didn’t really do it justice in my opinion. I’m also not a fan of fast choppy editing or grading it so dark that you can barely see anything. What’s the point of that? You put together a group of visuals and you spotlight with one lightbulb? I don’t care if you think it’s edgy Carol, I can’t see shit.

3. MARK LEE. I read all these comments about how Mark’s rapping only sounds good because everyone else is awful. I’m not sure where all these rap connoisseurs got their education from or if they need their hearing aides re-calibrated because he is by far the best rapper in SM and can hold his own against most other groups. There’s a reason he is in so many groups and sure, he probably sounds like an amateur if you compare him to Marshall Mathers III but honestly, all the Mark Lee erasure is so weird to me. 

4. MEMBERS. I felt like you saw enough of everyone except maybe Lucas, he didn’t really get any major lines. I’m glad it seemed relatively equal otherwise. Well, okay, I’ll stop lying: the Jopping MV is a total vehicle for Jongin and I’m really not mad about that. Anyways, it took me way too long to figure out that each group has their own mode of transport: EXO got their own helicopter. WayV have a tank. NCT have twin Aston Martins. Taemin got his own bike. I would’ve given the sleek cars to WayV because they’re Luxury Hoes. NCT should 1000% have a black tank. It’s only right Taemin gets a private yatch but they were in the desert so I’ll let that one go. 

5. THANK GOD FOR BAEKHYUN. That is all. 

6. ALBUM. It’s good. There’s something in it that reminds of early 2000s RnB. It’s not groundbreaking but it’s good and there’s an attempt at variety, which I appreciate. I genuinely think my positive reaction to SuperM is because I was expecting The Worst EDM Album ever. All the instrumentals are really good and sound heavy and complete, if that makes sense. Sometimes songs sound so unfinished and half-assed but I didn’t feel that on this one. If I had to rank the songs: Jopping-Can’t Stand The Rain-No Manners-Supercar-2fast. It’s funny actually because I think everyone expected me to HATE SuperM but I don’t. Maybe exams fried my brains or something. 

7. MARKETING. This is an essay in itself and I’ll keep it brief but: I hate it. I think the way SuperM were marketed and rolled-out really fluffed a lot of feathers in the kpop fan community and made people hate them before they even debuted. It’s a major flex that doesn’t necessarily have enough backing and I’m not entirely sure it will all work because it just seems like a desperate kind of cash-grab for a viral hit. I think some of the management choices around them have been horrible but that’s just my opinion. I wish them the best but can’t help thinking: what a waste of talent....

8. TAEYONG. Yeah I still love him. I stan a problematic idol but I’m a problematic person. So. *shrugs* I’m going to give him his own point. And not write anything else. 

[tututuuuuu]

(Empress Album)

NOTICE:Bold will be what's going on like with the camera and where it is pointed as well as the actions taking place, like stage directions. Blue will be the interview questions and violet will be Junri's answer and pink will be others answers like the boys.

The screen turns on, it's pointed to a couch in the living room. A figure enters and sits down. The camera focuses on the person.

"Hello my name is Seo Kang Junri and you'll see the making of my album"

The camera shuts off and all you can hear is voices.

"JUNRI, JUNGKOOK JUST CALLED ME OLD" screamed an angered Jin.

"JUNGKOOK-AH TREAT YOUR HYUNG WITH RESPECT"yelled back an unamused Junri

"Yes jinjin "

"How did the idea of releasing your first solo album come to" asked someone from behind the camera

"It didn't really come into my mind to release a solo album especially with how busy we are now"there was a brief pause before the female continued " At first Bang-PD had called me for a meeting and told me if I wanted to release some solo work,since many fans were expecting it" she took in a deep breath before continuing,as she held her hands in front of her. "I rejected the offer saying that I just wanted to focus on the group work and my relationship with my now-ex Kim Jongin,and it was true I wanted to slow down a little and not get too many things on my plate, yet everything came crashing down"

The screen cuts. It is blank for a second before it turns on again. Instead of the same living room of the dorm, we are bow in a studio. The camera is a little blurry before it focuses. It shows the rest of BTS sitting in the studio along with some staff that are helping,while Junri goes inside the booth getting ready to record.

Jimin is seen taking a piece of cake before the screen goes blank again. The camera is on again but this time back to the living room. It takes some time but the camera finally focuses on Junri.

"Can you tell us about your song TEACH YOU" the same voice that questioned the female singer before asked

"Yes, TEACH YOU is the first song I wrote for this album"said the female singer" Its about an event that happened to me about three years ago,it's about me telling THAT person that he made a mistake playing me " the 20 year old girl went on" There is a part where it says caught you red-handed should of been a better lier, to me that line is one of the best of the whole song because it's me claiming that I'm not the stupid girl he thinks I am."

The camera turns off again and then back on where you can see everyone in the studio paying close attention to Junri's recording. Everyone is scattered; Yoongi is sitting close to the computers checking her vocals as well as the lyrics. Namjoon sits on another wheeled chair similar to the one yoongi is sitting on, his eyes are closed as his fingers tap along the rhythm. Hoseok is on the sofa that's against the wall behind the huge desk/table in the middle of the room listening closely to the chorus making mental notes. Seokjin is also sitting on the couch,his head is tilted back wile his foot is bopping to the music. Jimin is sitting on the floor, eating a piece of cake while bopping his head making sure his noona dosent make a mistake wile recording. Taehyung is on a bean bag laying on it, taking a nap wile occasionally singing part of the lyrics in his sleep. Jungkook is on top of the huge table,his hand near the button that's connected to the mic so they can talk to Junri once she is done recording and give her some tips.

The camera the switches to Junri as she is recording. As she is singing her emotions out she is sucked into a flashback, the one that inspired the song. The screen the fades.

Junri is walking toward an apartment holding a bouket of roses. As she stops in front of the door she starts hearing noises,moans to be more precise. The said girl rushes to put on the code and rush inside.

As she opens the door,the noises increase. She can't seem to grasp the situation and starts following the noise. Junri stops in front of the bedroom door she shared with her boyfriend.

With shaky hands the idol singer grasps the doorknob getting ready to open it. It seemed as if time slowed down, he heart was beating at an irregular pace until it stoped.

In front of the singer were her boyfriend and another's girl going at it like rabbits. As if the pair sensed the presence of the girl the both turned to look at her.

"Junri it's not what it looks like"

"Shut it Taemin, you're a stupid boy"

With those words being said the female singer rushed out dropping the beautiful roses to the ground.

How could she have been stupid.

The camera turns on again. Junri is sitting on the living room floor with a pillow under her bum so it won't hurt. She is seen pouring some sprite in ice filled cups. On her left, Jin is seen opening containers of food and putting them in larger plates as well as putting them in the middle of the coffee table. Jungkook is seen placing plates and utensils on the large coffee table.

The screen glitches before it goes back to the group. This time everyone is sitting on the floor. The containers that once held food, were spotless clean out of it.

"How did the rest of you react to TEACH YOU"

"The song itself surprised most of us"responded the leader" In my opinion, the song has to be gold"

"I agree with Namjoon"responded the gummy smile man "Junri has put her emotions in the song,which makes it even more valuable"

There was a silence in the room before Taehyung sneezed. Everyone in the room erupts into laughter.

The camera shuts off,all you can hear is voices

"Is it ok if we continue the interview tomorrow"asked the interviewer

"Its fine, we can make the next the episode with you asking us and other staff that helped with the making of the album,right noona"asked the maknae

"Yes, we can also do the behind the scenes of the music video"responded the said female" It will be the second part involving this song, I think each song will have that" she finished

There is some rumaging of dishes and steps before everything is off.

Listen to the original song

[eninilaup8]

50 things tag

Thanks @suhoerections for tagging me and giving me something to do :)

1. What takes up too much of your time?

Used to be school but now that I finished, i’d say sleeping fml

2. What makes your day better?

A bright sun in the sky, seeing my dog, doing something productive, seeing or talking to my friends

3. What’s the best thing to happen to you today?

Anything lmao someone make something happen

4. What fictional place would you like to go to?

hogwarts maybe, or the avengers’ base

5. Are you good at giving advice?

Idk if my advice is actually good, but i like listening to people and trying to help them

6. Do you have any mental illness?

nope

7. Have you ever experienced sleep paralysis?

No, my mum did but I haven’t, it looks scary as shit. But I did have a phase of night terrors :)

8. What musician inspired you the most?

Idk, i’d say Jongin inspires me in the everyday life but not as a musician but as someone who is ambitious and who works hard to make his dreams come tru

9. Have you ever fallen in love?

Nope, I’ve actually never had a boyfriend. I’ve had a few feelings for some guys but it wasn’t love LOVE

10. What’s your dream date?

Idk, sunny day and a walk in the park, laying down and talking about everything, eating ice cream and taking pics of flowers and each other, or MUSEUM date!!

11. What do others notice about you?

People usually say that I have a resting bitch face, and that I also have big eyes

12. What is an annoying habit you have?

I usually scratch my scalp idk why?

13. Do you still talk to your first love?

how can i talk to him if he doesn’t EXIST✌🏼👌🏼🤙🏼🤘🏼

14. How many exes do you have?

:)

15. How many songs are in your playlist?

Idk but i know that my playlist is 15h long

16. What instruments can you play?

the triangle🥴🤪

17. What do you have the most pictures of?

memes, me and my friends, my outfits

18. Where would you like to go before you die?

in space! a whole dream, but if you want something that’s actually possible, i’d like to travel all around the world, i really can’t choose. but if you really want a place, i’ve recently been wanting to go to Japan

19. What is your zodiac?

I’m a fucking aries

20. Do you relate to it?

Sometimes yes, but there are a lot of ares things that I don’t relate to at all

21. What is happiness to you?

Simple things, going outside on a sunny day, seeing my friends and family being happy, spending time with my dog, good food, dogs, travelling!!!, discovering new things and cultures etc, enjoying art

22. Are you going through anything right now?

yes, life

23 What’s the worst decision you ever made?

I have no idea, i’ve made a lot of bad decisions but idk which one was the worst

24. What’s your favorite store?

Zara💕

25. What’s your opinion on abortion?

We, women, should have complete control and possession of our body and of what happens in out out of it. You can give your opinin freely but don’t try to make it a universal truth and impose it to others.

26. Do you keep a bucket list?

Maybe a mental one, i should write on down

27. Do you have a favorite album?

Not really

28. What do you want for your birthday?

My birthday was like two weeks ago but honestly i’m not one to ask for something. If you wanna give my something, i’m not going to stop you but if you don’t want to, thats fine. I legit want people to be happy and save earth

29. What are most people’s first impression of you?

Usually, they say that I look like a complete bitch. But when they get to know me, they say I can be quite intimidating cause I’m opiniated and am not scared to share my opinions. But mainly that I’m funny and cool (and stylish eh)

30. What age do you seem according to most people?

I don’t have a precise age, but they usually think I’m a bit younger, like 17

31. Where do you keep your phone while you’re sleeping?

Ony bedside table. Quite close to me cause i’m a heavy sleeper and i barely hear my alarm if it’s too far

32. What word do you say the most?

yeet? lmao? like?

33. What’s the oldest age you would date?

I hate the idea of age gap dating like? As long as you get along and the person is great for you and you’re happy? But like, rn as I’m 19, the oldest would be 25 i think. But later on, a 10 year-old gap wouldn’t bother me, as long as he’s not 15 years older than me, then it gets a bit too much in my opinion

34. What’s the youngest age you would date?

I’m still young so like, 2 years younger maybe? But not younger, i’m not a babysitter

35. What job/career do most people say would suit you?

Everyone tells me that a career in fashion would be perfect (which is what I’m aiming for), or modelling sometimes. My family says in politics cause they’re scared of me whenever there’s a debate

36. What’s your favorite music genre?

POP

37. If you could live in any country in the world, where would it be?

Honestly i don’t care, as long as the government is « great », which is why I love France so much (the government is far from being perfect but you know). I wouldn’t be able to live in the USA for example, or any country where inequalities are huge

38. What is your current favorite song?

all the way by joan, daddy af by slayyyter (which hasn’t come out yet lmao but already a bop). PLEASE listen to these artists they’re not famous at all but deserve so much more

39. How long have you had this blog for?

It’s not really a blog? I’m mainly here to get info, for pictures and fanfics. But I’ve been here for like, a few years

40. What are you excited for?

My summer vacation! I’m going to Berlin for a week and then to Rome for another with my best friends♥️

41. Are you a better talker or listener?

I think I’m a better talker, but I’m also a good listener

42. What is the last productive thing you did?

Going to the grocery store with my mum (is this productive??)

43. What do you want for Christmas?

My studies paid by some unknown billionaire

44. What class do you get the best grades in?

English literature and everything that involves me speaking English

45. On a scale of 1-10, how are you feeling right now?

6-7

46. What can you see yourself doing in ten years?

Being a fashion journalist for some big magazine, going to fashion shows and meeting incredible people, travelling everywhere and being happy :)

47. When did you get your first heartbreak?

I wasn’t in love but I got « abandoned » by a guy i was getting to know when I was 15-16, and i kind of was sad for a couple weeks but that’s all, nothing huge

48. What age do you want to get married?

I don’t have a particular age limit? If I get married at 55, well then lets do it. I don’t even know if I’ll ever get married.

49. What career did you want to have as a child?

I wanted to be a singer, then an english teacher, then a model, then an actress... what the hell

50. What do you crave right now?

A love life duzjsbdbdb

Now, I’m tagging @justasouthernlady, @yeoldontknow @tempxo and whoever else wants to do it :)

[duckydae]

This is a new series where I take one of my favourite fanfics and write an in-depth review on it. 

Title: Black Pearl

Author: EXO-Dreamer

Length: 32 Chapters

Paring: Byun Baekhyun x OC x Do Kyungsoo

AU: Pirate

Status: Completed

Find it: (Here)

Premise: “The old tales speak of a notorious pirate that once sailed as the captain of EXO. They say that when he wasn't searching for hold, he was often found in the bed of women or single-handedly taking down a whole ship on his own. Legends say that it is Byun Baekhyun whose name robbed men curse under their breath, the name their wives desperately scream at night, and the name they say the sea calls its master.

But one fateful day when the boat is attacked along the marine, and all seems for naught, a stranger brings Baekhyun safely back to shore. Before the ship captain fully gains consciousness to see his saviour, he can only see a glimpse of her wavy black hair and the black jewel around her neck before she escapes without a trace into the ocean.”

Black Pearl is single-handedly one of the most immersive pieces of fiction you will ever read, despite the fact it is fan-fiction and Disney would kill us if we ever placed it above their so-called masterpiece of a series that is the ‘Pirates of the Caribbean’ franchise. Let’s face it, it isn’t so much of a movie than watching Johnny Depp play, Johnny Depp.

But this, this is a whole new level. Honestly, skip the films and dive straight into this beast of a story – yes, pun intended. The story of the Black Pearl is based on multiple different pieces of media that has been tied rather smoothly into one entity. The first naturally being EXO’s, Black Pearl from their album Exodus, but you knew that. The second being, Hans Christian Andersen’s, The Little Mermaid and finally, The Princess Bride – which I actually didn’t know until I revisited the foreword.  

What makes it so good you ask? EXO-Dreamer’s world-building is mind-blowing. Every nook and cranny explored to its absolute fullest, which allows you to feel not only for the three centred protagonists but also be severely involved the others surrounding them which then leads into her fantastic use of characterisation. But, back to the setting. I’m not going to lie to you guys, I haven’t re-read this in a while so my knowledge isn’t to its absolute fullest because I just don’t have that much time anymore – oh, to be in High School again but I’ll try my best. To take an educated guess, this is probably post-golden age, based on a character in the sequel. Like, during the tiny sweet-spot just before it started to die-out, along everyone else for that matter because Cholera was oh-so rampant, especially among my people – manky water.

This story was a collection of things I love the most, so it was hard for me to turn away. I’m a history buff and my preferred area of expertise is the golden-age of piracy – love me some Anne Bonny not, only that but as a Baekhyun story. You mean the cheeky son of a bitch that is constantly neck and neck with dear old Kyungsoo? Sign me the fuck up. The icing on the cake was really just the Mermaid storyline, Ariel has been my favourite princess for as long as I can remember – No shade Merida but like, she’s got the hottest prince and you’ve just got my accent. There’re also a few little other details but I won’t dive into spoilers, just yet.

So, world-building, I don’t know about you guys, but I personally pictured this quaint little Island with a village-like aesthetic and I was loving every second of it. If you’ve ever watched Black Sails or played either Black Flag or Uncharted 4 you’ll know what I mean.

To jump into my favourite thing about this thing is the characterisation.

I’m actually not going to start with the two leads, because unsurprisingly they aren’t my favourites – I know it’s like my heart wants to harm itself. To start off, I’m going to jump into Yixing’s character, who is the designated socialite and knows everything about everyone – that’s why his hair is so big. It’s full of secrets. Yixing’s character, the more I saw of him the more endearing he became. Every witty comeback, every sly gesture to say I was #livingforit would be an understatement. I just picture this savvy guy parading around with a bunch of mischievous, filthy pirates, similar to a Korean mother in a drama would drag around her idiotic sons. His relationship with Baekhyun in particular is fascinating, Yixing seems to be one of few who can truly tame the crazy that is Byun Baekhyun.

This isn’t really them individually but rather as a unit, Jinjoo’s sisters were amazing. You could really tell the author really did create solid personalities for each-one and the way they protected their youngest sister played off well against the pirate crew. If I had to pick my favourites would be Sun-Hee and Krystal. Also, the set-up that they essentially ran their own tavern/brothel? – is it, I vaguely remember – was so refreshing. Funnily enough historically accurate, well sort of. Things like that were common in the Wild West for women to basically run the economy off the back of prostitution.

Okay, so cranking it up a little more I’m going to tackle Kyungsoo, which for me it is difficult – as I am currently reading through the sequel and my god does this scallywag get an upgrade, so my opinion on him heavily differs. Kyungsoo wasn’t a huge interest for me, I’d seen his archetype countless times before, so I knew what the gang were getting themselves into and if it came down to the wire, it would be Baekhyun that gets the girl. Kyungsoo in book one is just too pure for this harsh world but his friendship with Jinjoo was sweet. Buckle up boys, just wait until you read number two. Like fucking swoon alert, EXO-Dreamer resurrected my love for dark Soo and I am loving every second of it.

Before I get to Baekhyun and Jinjoo, I’m going to pick-apart something that I’ve never really noticed anyone do. Cameo’s, Cameo’s are rampant in stories like this and sometimes the work sometimes they don’t, but I really have to commend the author for getting it so damn right. Particularly in book two but here, the insertion of BoA was genius considering what she represents in real life within the K-Pop community. I’ll not spoil any of them but I legit screamed when I read two particularly cameos in book two. The names don’t feel shoehorned in, unlike most. What I’ve noticed is that most stories have them for the sake of having a cameo – similar to films. But in this it truly feels that a character was needed so let’s look through the rolodex of stars and see what actually fits the story’s need.

Okay, time to tackle the OC. Honestly, I really like Jinjoo. It’s not often I can read an OC that has agency, god I struggle with it all the damn time but seriously this one is so elegantly written and flesh out so well. Who knew a girl could have more than one emotion at a time! Her relationship with Luhan and her sisters is by far my favourite, particularly with Krystal.

Baekhyun, ho, Baekie what have you done to me. I love this depiction of Baekhyun, is it the most faithful thing, no. Nothing is, but to say he wasn’t the least bit entertaining would be a flat out lie. Like this guy is Sparrow on acid, what I will say reading his sections with Jinjoo really took me back to my Hetalia days; we don’t talk about that any more. Baek was very Arthur-esque and I loved every second on of it. Sure, he starts of as that classic charismatic fuckboi we are warned about and you better believe he’s still that at the end, even so the captain gets a solid glo-up.

Plot? Was it predictable, no, not entirely but like they say; “It’s the journey, not the destination.” And it’s the journey I sign-up for. Personally, I do prefer the sequel, but I think that’s just because I’ve seen these characters grow, particularly Baekhyun and Kyungsoo.

Finally, what about the rest of our boys, well they’re there and they even get to shine too! Some more than others but I distinctly remember crying at one of Jongin’s side-plot rather than the main trios.

To close up I highly recommend this story to whoever just wants to throw themselves into something and feeeeel… because trust me hun, you will.

I will do El Dorado when it has been completed.

Next: One Of Us.

[im-obsessed-help-me]

Alphabet Tag!

Tagged by @aerigom THANKS this is so cute!

Rules: make a new post answering the questions and tag people you’d like to get to know better

A: Age | 18

B: Birthplace | Maryland USA

C: Current time | 6:27 pm

D: Drink you had last | Tea!

E: Easiest person to talk to | my sisters- we’re really close and have the absolute best relationship

F: Favourite song | WHY DO YOU MAKE ME CHOOSE THERES TOO MUCH MUSIC ! Right at this very second probably Universe by EXO but it literally changes every minute. anything exo is amazing so they end up at the top a lot. I also love musicals and a bunch of other British and American artists and listening to soundtracks

G: Grossest memory | the time when I fell off the monkey bars in kindergarten and pierced my lip open on the mulch on the ground and had to go to the emergency room.

H: Hogwarts house | It’s either Ravenclaw or Gryffindor. I see myself as Gryffindor, my friends will bet their lives I’m a Ravenclaw, the test has given me both answers.

I: In love? | in a complicated way

J: Jealous of people? | Rarely

K: Killed someone? | came close after exo was disrespected at MAMA but nope. (this is a joke don’t arrest me pls)

L: Love at first sight or should I walk by again? | depends on the person. Since I haven’t fully fallen in love yet I’m not sure. But the romantic in me thinks I’ll believe in love at first sight.

M: Middle name | Catherine

N: Number of siblings? | 3

O: One wish? | to live a life that makes a difference

P: Person you last called | My sister

Q: Question you are always asked | “why do you spell your name weird?”

R: Reasons to my smile | EXO, my family, sunrises, music, sleeping in, books, ice cream, coffee, midnights, sparklers, stargazing, new pens, paint, new canvases, good food, rain boots, cute things, colors, marble, castles, fancy dresses, my friends, laughter, animals (especially baby animals), the list goes on. I get sad a lot but I do love smiling.

S: Song you sang last | Everglow by Coldplay

T: Time you woke up | 9:30 am

U: Underwear colour | white

V: Vacation destination | I would go literally anywhere. I’m the textbook definition of a wanderlust. But top of my list are St. Petersburg, London, Poland, SouKor, Thailand, Montreal, and Machu Pichu.

W: Worst habit | I dwell on the little things and they make me sad. Once I’m sad I have a tendency to want to stay sad.

X: X-rays | had one when I got my wisdom teeth out but not really any others. I don’t hurt myself that much (which is surprising considering how clumsy I am and the trees I’ve fallen out of).

Y: Your favourite food | I love rice and I could probably eat rice for the rest of my life. Also chicken. And spätzle (which is German and delicious) and pierogi (which are Polish and delicious).

Z: Zodiac sign | Capricorn

Ultimate Bias: Jongin

Ultimate bias wrecker: Junmyeon and Jongdae

Favourite kpop song: There are wayyy too many but Monster, Sweet Lies, Miracles in December, Lights Out, Forever, and El Dorado by EXO, Nosedive by Chen and Dynamic Duo, My Love by Lee Hi, Gee and Into the New World by SNSD, Red Flavor, Peek-A-Boo and Kingdom Come by Red Velvet, Black Suit by SuJu, Ring Ding Dong and Why So Serious by SHINee, and so many more

First kpop song: I heard Fantastic Baby by Big Bang when I was like 13 but had no idea it was kpop so it doesn’t really count. Technically my first kpop song was Monster by EXO.

Favourite kpop album: The War by EXO

Favourite kpop ship: asldkdosjwkd don’t make me choose this

Hard or soft stan: soft soft soft soft soft soft

Favourite Kpop company: i have my issues with SM but they have all my fav artists and all the SM artists are awesome and friendly and beautiful so ima say SM

Backstory of how I got into kpop: It all started back in summer of 2016 when I was messing around on YouTube and stumbled on EXO’s Monster mv (it was like a week after it had released) and I remember thinking “this is creepy but the blonde guy is hot the dance is amazing and these vocals are insane”. Fast-forward a year and I had completely forgotten about this, but I was having a really bad day earlier in summer 2017 and I texted a friend of mine and asked her to recommend me some music to cheer me up. She isn’t a big kpop fan but listens to EXO now and then, so she was like “you like different languages and dance and beautiful voices, so listen to this album that came out this morning the boys have good voices and are all really great people”. I listened to it straight through and was Shook ™ and then literally did not leave my house for like 4 days straight while I watched every exo MV in existence and spent so much time learning their names (I remember when I found out that they had names other than their stage names and thinking I’d never remember them all lol). I distinctly remember watching Monster again the second time with knowledge of who I was watching and being sooooo amazed and getting filled with this intense and beautiful deja vu- the beat drop at the refrain came and that was the moment I was like “these boys are gonna change my life”. And then right after that I sobbed while watching Miracles in December and I realized that I had been blessed- very blessed- to find these boys and their healing words. I don’t regret this or the family I’ve found thanks to EXO:)

Tagging: askskdksnwkekss I have no idea who to tag uhhh @penguinsoo0112 (who needs to be thanked because she taught me the ropes of being an exol and is the literal best) @royalnini @hannermax and anyone else who wants to do it- just say I tagged u and go for it!

Thanks so much this was super fun!!!

[mintchocolatechen]

Kiss Me

Pairing: Jongdae x OC 

written for the prompt: “if i kiss you i won’t stop”

Jisoo can’t help but glance at Jongdae out of the corner of her eyes from where she sits. He’s reading one of the books Jongin had recommended recently, curled up on the other corner of the couch and blanket draped over himself. 

A pout pulls at her lips as she adjusts her own blanket on herself, unable to stop herself as she turns to full out stare at Jongdae. He had invited her over to hang out at his apartment and it’s not like Jisoo had been expecting anything to happen. Most of these hang outs went to watching shows together or just eating and talking. 

But now that Jisoo thinks about it, as long as they’ve been dating, Jongdae really hasn’t kissed her. At least not anything past chaste, innocent kisses. She wonders if it’s a problem with her. Could their brief kisses be enough that Jongdae thought she was a bad kisser?  Did she have bad breath? Was he losing interest in her? 

“You’re doing a lot of deep thinking over there,” Jongdae speaks up suddenly, not even glancing away from his book. Jisoo blinks, eyes fluttering for a couple of moments before she looks away as if she can pretend she wasn’t just staring at her boyfriend. Pulling her phone out from under her blanket, she tries to bury herself into the couch as she pulls the blanket up higher. 

(Jongdae’s apartment is cold on top of the winter storm outside. Jisoo doesn’t get why he doesn’t turn the heater up but whatever, she doesn’t pay the bills around here.) 

“I’m just thinking,” she answers as vaguely as she can. She knows it’s supposed to be her cue for her to tell Jongdae what she’s thinking about but he’s either going to laugh, have a serious talk with her, or break up with her. Jisoo would really rather not deal with any of those reactions so she’ll settle for letting Jongdae wonder what she’s thinking about. 

He glances up at her, brow raised. “You’re not going to tell me what’s on your mind?”

“I’m wondering when Chen’s solo album is going to be released,” she lies as she focuses on her phone, scrolling through her apps. Her eyes are really focused on Jongdae though and the odd look he sends her way. He huffs out a laugh before bookmarking his book and closing it, making his way over to her. 

“You’re such a liar,” he laughs, nudging his nose along her temple as he wraps his arms around her waist. “Talk to me baby." 

"Don’t be disgusting,” Jisoo breathes out, face flushing and heart racing. She doesn’t think she’ll ever get used to him holding her, touching her. God how was she even supposed to kiss him if she reacted like this? Perhaps it’s a good thing that wasn’t a problem then. Maybe him not kissing her was a blessing. Then she wouldn’t have to worry about having a heart attack every time he did. 

That isn’t the point though. The point is, Jongdae is really, really unfair. 

He laughs before pressing his lips gently to her cheek. “Come on,” he whines, dragging his voice as he throws his legs around her. “I like hearing your voice. Tell me what’s on your mind. Let Dr. Kim help you." 

"You’re disgusting,” she laughs, trying to shrug him off. It doesn’t work at all. Not when Jongdae is wrapped around her like some sort of koala, determined to not let go until she talks. Maybe not even after that. 

They both pause when the doorbell rings though and Jisoo turns to Jongdae, head tilted. 

“You have guests?”

“Aw crap,” Jongdae says as he retracts his arms and legs from her before he stands up. “I forgot Kyungsoo was coming over so we could study for ECON.” He glances over at her apologetically but Jisoo smiles at him as she stands after him, shaking her head. 

“It’s fine. I think Krystal wanted to get milk tea and talk tonight anyways. I’ll see you,” she says, beating him to the door with her stuff and slipping into her sneakers. She opens it up to see Kyungsoo there just as expected, Econ book in one hand and the other on the backpack slung over his shoulder. 

“Hey Kyungsoo,” she greets, waving at him. “Have fun studying." 

She pushes past him then, not even letting Jongdae get a word out as he watches her go. His lips purse together as he sticks his head out the door to watch Jisoo dash towards the elevator. 

"I didn’t even get to kiss her goodbye,” he whines. 

“Maybe she thinks you’re a bad kisser,” Kyungsoo replies nonchalantly as he steps into Jongdae’s apartment.

“Hey! That’s not true!" 

-

"What if he thinks I’m a bad kisser,” Jisoo asks, completely mortified as Chanyeol tunes his guitar. He glances up at her, face contorted. “Well are you?”

“I’ve never kissed anyone before him,” Jisoo answers, face flushing at her confession. “I probably am." 

"I don’t know,” Sehun says as he looks up from his phone. “If my girlfriend didn’t know how to kiss because it was her first time really kissing anyone, I’d go out of my way to teach her. It just means more of an opportunity to kiss her.”

“Then do you think he wants to break up with me,” Jisoo gasps, eyes immediately glossing over. “He probably doesn’t kiss me because he’s not attracted to me anymore. What if he’s trying to-”

“That’s definitely not it,” Chanyeol cuts her off. “He was just telling us yesterday about how he thinks you’re so cute and how he’s so lucky to have you and how you really are the one.” His voice raises in pitch as he says it, feigning a dreamy look with his hands clasped together. 

Jisoo’s face somehow gets impossibly redder and she’s covering her face with her hands at the comment. Chanyeol was definitely over exaggerating but those words could have definitely come out of Jongdae’s mouth. “Okay maybe not that." 

"Bad breath,” Sehun offers. Jisoo freezes then, stopping to try and smell her breath. “You think so?”

“Just pop a mint,” Chanyeol says with a wave of his hand. “Right now too, before you sing. If it’s that bad-”

Jisoo’s popped two before Chanyeol can finish speaking. 

-

“You’re really into mints lately,” Jongdae says pointedly as Jisoo tosses one into her mouth. They’ve just finished lunch and Jongdae is planning on dropping her off at her apartment before he heads over to work. Of course Jisoo’s kind of anticipating a goodbye kiss and maybe he’ll do it if she’s popped a mint. 

“They’re good,” she answers, biting down on it. They’re refreshing, sure, but lately, Jisoo just feels like she’s constantly eating toothpaste. She’s probably going to stop liking mint chocolate chip ice cream if this continues. 

“Me too,” Jongdae asks, hand stuck out as he waits for one. Jisoo snorts before dropping one into his hand. Now both of their mouths are going to be minty fresh when they kiss. This’ll be fine then. This is going to work out. 

Except right when they get to the door of Jisoo’s apartment, all Jongdae does is press a kiss to the corner of her lips and run off. He’s running late, apparently. 

“It’s not the breath,” Jisoo says as she enters Chanyeol’s room. He glances up from his music sheet, head tilted. “We both had mints. All I do is eat mints. It can’t be the mints." 

Chanyeol snorts before pushing his computer chair over to his mini fridge, grabbing a bottle of alcohol for her. "Take a fucking sip babe,” he laughs. 

“Fuck off,” she growls, snatching the bottle after he’s popped it open. 

-

All Kyungsoo can do is stare in disbelief at Jisoo as she spills her worries to Baekhyun who bursts out laughing. Kyungsoo can’t believe he just had to hear Jisoo say she’s worried Jongdae isn’t attracted to her anymore. 

All because they rarely kiss. 

“You guys are both stupid,” Kyungsoo huffs out. “You both say the same things. No wonder you’re dating each other.”

Jisoo stares at Kyungsoo, clearly confused even though he just laid out the whole thing for her. “What? What do you mean?”

“I mean,” Baekhyun laughs, wiping at his tears. “It’s not the breath and it’s definitely not because he isn’t in love with you. It’s probably the complete opposite." 

"He was sad because you didn’t kiss him goodbye the other day,” Kyungsoo adds, going back to his homework. “He thinks you don’t even really want to kiss him." 

"Have you tried talking to him,” Baekhyun asks. The asshole is still laughing, wiping the tears away from the corner of his eyes. He really did get a kick out of this one. 

“No,” Jisoo answers, clearly flustered from the reactions of her friends. “I don’t want to make him uncomfortable." 

"Well maybe if you asked Jongdae why you guys don’t kiss a lot he’d tell you,” Baekhyun says, smiling towards her. Or behind her? His eyes have sort of lifted like he’s looking at something else. And maybe, just maybe is he smirking now. 

Jisoo turns then, face paling when she sees Jongdae standing there. He looks surprised as he stares at Jisoo and she makes quick work in gathering her stuff and walking passed him. 

“I’ll see you guys,” she says, running out of the student center just as Jongdae is calling after her. 

“You’re both stupid,” Kyungsoo says pointedly when Jongdae stands there for a second, hesitating. Baekhyun tilts his head then a smug expression on his face while he rests his cheek against his palm. “So are you going to run after her or not?" 

-

Even though Jongdae ran after Jisoo, she did a damn well good job of hiding from him. It’s a great thing really that the cafe Jisoo works at is right around the block and that her manager loves her enough to let her hide out in the back until Jongdae clears. 

"Are you and Jongdae fighting,” Junmyeon asks when he walks into the back to see her organizing it. Jisoo glances at him nervously before laughing. “Not really. We’re just bad at talking things out apparently,” she says as she grabs a stack of large cups and turns to Junmyeon. “Need larges?”

“Get out. I love free labor but you’re already always here. I feel bad for always taking up your time,” Junmyeon sighs. Jisoo laughs before she’s grabbing her bag, setting the cups in Junmyeon’s arms. “I’ll see you tomorrow boss!”

“Bright and early,” he calls back. 

-

“How can Jongdae not want to kiss you,” Chanyeol asks as Jisoo walks into the dressing room. She glances up from where she’s fixing her shirt, pulling it up so she’s not so revealing. Her fingers slide over the fabric of her high waist shorts before she’s tilting her head. 

“I look that good tonight?”

“You say that like you didn’t dress with an intent to look good,” Chanyeol replies. His eyes linger at her legs then, catching on the leg garter. “Really?”

“It’s sexy,” Jisoo says, twisting her leg in, a smirk on her face. “Fits my rocker concept." 

"You’re going to drive him mad tonight,” Chanyeol says with a shake of his head. Baekhyun is bounding into the room next, makeup on his eyes and hair styled back before whistling when his eyes land on Jisoo. 

“You’re really trying to get him to kiss you tonight aren’t you?" 

And then a pause before he looks closer. "Hey, are those my girlfriend’s clothes? Are you telling me you didn’t even go home because you knew he’d be waiting for you there? Wait, is that her garter?" 

"How do you know she has a garter,” Jisoo gasps, hand held over her chest as she eyes Baekhyun. “Don’t tell me." 

"I won’t tell you!" 

"Oh my god,” Jisoo laughs, slapping at her thigh. She pauses then before suddenly tugging at the garter. “Oh my god,” she repeats. “Um.”

“She’s never worn it,” Baekhyun clarifies, clearly as horrified as Jisoo is. “I’ve just seen it around." 

"That was the most disturbing thing I’ve ever had to witness,” Chanyeol says after a second as he stands up suddenly. “Alright! Show time! Two minutes till we’re on,” he say, pushing them out of the room. 

The crowd is already gathered around the stage when Jisoo and the rest run onto it. Her eyes quickly scan over the room as the lights turn on over them, waving here and there but she knows what she’s looking for. More importantly, who  she’s looking for. 

She finds Jongdae in one of the corner booths, his hair pushed back and eyeliner rimming his eyes. His leather jacket sits on his shoulders, almost falling off to reveal the white tank he has on underneath and if he were standing, Jisoo would bet he’s wearing the damn torn jeans that always look so good on him. God he looked good. 

Seems like they were both being unfair to each other tonight. 

Jisoo introduces herself briefly when it comes to her turn before they’re moving into place and their set begins. 

“You guys did so good,” Jisoo hears as they’re walking into the VIP area. It’s Baekhyun’s girlfriend, already excited as she wraps her arm around Baekhyun’s. He leans down to press a kiss to her lips then and Jisoo grimaces. 

Kissing. 

Ugh. Jongdae. 

“You know, that could be us,” Jongdae laughs into her ear as his arms slide around her waist. Jisoo shivers involuntarily as she’s pulled against Jongdae’s chest. So she’s a little sensitive considering they are sort of not talking. Even if it’s only been a couple of hours since the (lack of) confrontation. 

“You’re one to talk,” Jisoo huffs, cheeks flushing red. She’s unable to look him in the eyes as he turns her towards him, his hands on her shoulders as he looks down at her. 

He is wearing the torn jeans, Jisoo notes as she stares down. God Jisoo loves those jeans. They always look so good on him. 

She hears him laugh before he’s leaning in, whispering into her ear as he wraps an arm around her waist. “Is that what you’ve been upset about these last two weeks? Mints because you thought I didn’t want to kiss you?" 

"Shut up,” Jisoo huffs in embarrassment. She steps away then, face flushing. She wants to run away and hide because she can’t stand all this teasing Jongdae is doing to her. He laughs before grabbing her arm and pulling her in once more.

“Let’s go home,” he says as he begins walking towards the exit. Jisoo blinks as she follows after him, turning back once to look to her friends for help. They’re all sending her off though, smirks on their faces as they wave at her. 

The traitors, Jisoo thinks as she lets Jongdae tug her out of the bar. 

They’re in a taxi and back at Jongdae’s apartment before Jisoo even knows it. It’s only once Jisoo has toed off her shoes does Jongdae push her up against the wall, letting out a deep breath as he cages her in between his arms. 

“You look really, really good tonight,” Jongdae breathes out, leaning in to press his forehead against her own. Jisoo can only blink up at him in surprise, pulse racing. 

They’ve never done this before. They’ve never been together this late at night. Never been in such a heavy atmosphere together. It’s taking Jisoo’s breath away. 

“Don’t do it again,” he says as he wraps an arm around Jisoo’s waist. “Chanyeol kept looking at you. I didn’t like it." 

Jisoo lets out a breathy laugh, arms coming up to sling themselves around Jongdae’s neck. "Chanyeol likes the girl from his chemistry class. You probably just thought he was looking." 

"No, everyone was looking,” he says possessively and when Jisoo looks up into his eyes, she can’t help but shiver. There are many words she could use to describe the look in his eyes but the easiest to use would be lust. 

Kim Jongdae looks like he could devour her right this second and Jisoo isn’t sure if she would stop him. She’s not sure she would want to. 

“Jongdae,” Jisoo breathes out, fingers stroking over his neck as she tilts her head up. “Kiss me." 

He lets out a short laugh, gaze falling to her mouth, parted and painted a dark red. "If I kiss you, I won’t stop,” he whispers. 

“Then don’t." 

Here is my short fun read!!!! This is just something I wrote in between trying to write for one of my other stories and having a lack of inspiration. I’m not expecting much haha but a like or just message that you guys enjoyed it would make me super happy!!!

[littlekatlizzy]

IM SO LATE IM SORRY BUT AHAHA ALL OF THEM. For the EXO and cafe asks. ALL OF THEM. Have fun 💕

Thats over a houndred......Okay!

Exo asks:1: Whats your favourite album? : Exology chapter 1: The lost planet2: Favourite title song? : For life3: Best Era?: OVERDOSE4: Favourite b-side song?: Playboy5: Who’s your bias?: .......KimJongKai6: Who’s your bias wrecker?: Byun Baekhyun7: Favourite choreo?: Christmas Day or The star tbh8: Favourite MV?: Call me baby9: Favourite EXO Showtime episode?: CHANYEOLS BIRTHDAY 10: EXO K or EXO M?:  EXO.11: OT12 or OT9?: OT12 forever12: Dance line or Vocal line?: ....EXO.13: Vocal line or Rap line?: *sweats nervously* EXO?14: Favourite vocalist?: probably Jongdae15: Favourite dancer?: UHM KAI??? And Luhan tho16: Favourite rapper?: Chanyeol17: EXO first Box or EXO second box?: Second box18: Miracles in December or Sing for you?: Sing for you19: Wolf or Growl?: Growl20: Is EXO your bias group: Yep21: MAMA superpowers or WOLF werewolves?: MAMA22: Favourite Friendship?: Kai&Luhan and Lay&Luhan23: Favourite ship?: Chanbaek all the way24: Favourite China-line member?: Luhan25: Aegyo Xiumin or Abs Xiumin?: Aegyo Xiu26: Do you own the EXO Lightstick?: Nope27: Lucky one or Monster?: Monster28: XOXO or EXODUS?: EXODUS29: EXODUS or EX’ACT?: EXODUS30: Favourite OT12 moment?: The one where they were at the beach in EXO Showtime31: Call me baby or Love me right?: Call me baby32: Favourite EXODUS song?: HURT33: Favourite Beagle-line member?: Byun Baek34: Favourite EXO Superpower?: Telekinesis (Luhan)35: As vocalists, Luhan or Chen?: Chen36: Drop that or Lightsaber?: (*is a starwars fan*) LIGHTSABER37: EXOLU’XION or The lost Planet?: THE LOST PLANET OMG38: How long did it take you to learn all their names?: .....excluding real names maybe 2 days?39: Favourite ballad?: Promise40: El Dorado or Black Pearl?: Black Pearl41: Least favourite ship?: uhhhhh...idk...KrisKai? Is that a thing?42: Kai or Jongin?: OH BOI Jongin of course c:43: Favourite EXOMENTARY Video?: BOWLING44: Favourite EXO-K Member?: Kai45: Favourite EXO-M Member? Luhan46: As vocalists, D.O or Baekhyun?: D.O47: As rappers, Sehun or Tao?: Uffffff.....Tao?48: Do you actually like wolf?: Depends on my mood49: Favourite OTP moment?: That one time when Sehun made Chanbaek hug during a concert :,)50: Have you ever seen EXO live?: Yeah! Live on V-Live...ahaha...51: Moment that made you cry?: Promise live performances where EXO cries :,)52: Most handsome member?: ......KIMJONGIN53: Do you still watch EXO Showtime occasionally?: Not really don’t wanna cry54: Cutest Member?: ZHANG YIXING55: First Bias?: Kai56: Favourite XOXO song?: Don’t go57: Favourite Baekhyun era?: Call me baby/Exodus era58: Satansoo or Squishysoo?: Satansoo cuz he’s ma bro59: Xiuhan or HunHan?: Xiuhan60: Favourite EXO Photocard: idk tbh61:Sehun’s eyebrows or Sehun’s legs?: Legs62: Favourite EXO pet?: Monggu, Jjangu and Jjangah63: Hyung-line or Maknae line?: EXO64: Favourite EXODUS song?: still Hurt65: Favourite movie with an EXO member in it?: Pure love with D.O66: How did you get into EXO?: Through friends67: Mom!Suho or Sexy!Suho?: Suho68: Promise or Heaven?: Heaven because this doesn’t make me cry69: Tao’s Z.Tao or Luhans Reloaded?: (I’m a Luhoe sorry Tao) Reloaded70: Favourite EX’ACT song?:  White noise, Artificial love & Heaven71: Xiumin bun or Luhan bun?: Xiubun72: Have you ever not liked a member?: I had a love-hate relationship with Kai for w long time73: Favourite Chen solo song?: Lucky!!!74: Baekyeol or Baekyeon?: :)))) BAEKYEOL75: Cold city gguy Kris or dorky Kris?: Dorky papa pls76: Favourite EXO cover song?: Does Chenbaeks ‘I really didn’t know’ count?77: Did you cry when listening to Promise?: still do78: EXO song that you do not like?: uhmmm... What is Love I think?79: Favourite couple talk (from exo first box)?: I dunno80: Favourite Kai era?: Overdose81: As dancers, Kai, Sehun or Lay?: Kai82: Baekhyun(ft.Suzy) Dream or Baekhyun8ft K.Will) The day?: Dream83: Favourite EXO Member IG account?: Baekhyun84: Favourite Awardshow performance?: I liked a lot so idk85: If you could get any of the MIC gifts, what would you get?: Chanyeols ring86: Kaisoo or TaeKai?: Both af87: Favourite Chanyeol gif?: Idk 88: MAMA or History?: MAMA89: Favourite lyrics?: You even liked my clumsy moments. But I wonder if I even deserve that love(Promise)90: Favourite Suho Era?: EX’ACT91: Red haired D.O yes or no?: HELL TO THE YES92: Favourite Chanyeol rap?: Black Pearl93: Favourite Fanfiction?: Read too many but probably I Give Up by @soobadnoonecanstopher94: Lay’s go fighting or Luhan’s Running Man?: Go fighting is one of my fave shows not gonna lie95: Pathcodes or Wolf Drama?: Pathcodes96: Taohun or Taoris?: Taoris97: EXO Showtime or EXO next door?: Showtime98: Most significant song for you?: Don’t go99: Who are your top 3 Members?: Kai, Luhan, Baekhyun100: Why do you like EXO?: Exo (Korean: 엑소; stylized as EXO) is a South Korean-Chinese boy group based in Seoul. Formed by S.M. Entertainment in 2011, the group debuted in 2012 with twelve members separated into two subgro-

CAFE ASKSVanilla Chai Latte: Are you in love?: Not really?Flat White: Coffe or tea?: bothCappuccino: What’s your middle name?: don’t have oneMocha: Dream Job?: No idea actuallyPumpkin spice: Dream Car?: Don’t have oneJasmine Tea: If you could go anywhere in the world, where and why?: Japan because I love animeOld english: You’re stranded on an island, who comes along?: My Phone so that I can have everyone somewhat with meIced chocolate: Do you have a crush on someone?: YeahCaramel Frappe: Favourite videogame?: Kingdom  HeartsIced Lemon Tea: Favourite Song/Band?: EXO & Don’t goIced Cafe Mocha: Favourite thing to do on rainy days?: Sleep and readHot chocolate: Are you an affectionate person?: sometimesCaramel Macchiato: You’re traveling the entire world but you can only take one person with you, who?: I don’t knowGreen Tea: How tall are you?: 5′1...Earl Grey Tea: The Zombie Apocalypse is coming! Wha’ts your plan?:Mint Tea: How do you relax?: I’m the first to die probsVanilla Latte: Board games or drinking games?: Video gamesIced coffee: Do you like reading, if so, which book is your favourite?: Milk&Honey by Rupi KaurItalian soda: Describe your dream date: A dateSparkling water: Describe what qualities you look for in a person: Accepting, nice, laid back, soft voice and gentle smilesOrange juice: Have you ever had a Valentine?: @bts-exo-seouls Rose Hip Tea: describe your first kiss: Yet to comeHerbal Tea: You’re at a candle shop, what candle do you buy?: If it smells and looks good, mine.

PS: Fuck you Sam my eyes burn

[vevovixx]

Tag, I’m it

I was tagged by my lovely @hakyeon-go-go (Thank you Trish! I was thinking of putting this on my main blog but I’ll put it on here for a change :D) 

I’ll tag some mutuals from my mainblog ( @vixxeroni ) which include; @jaehwans-thighs , @kyebumzu-official , @tinymilo , @taekwooniverse , @hotseok , @officialjooheon , @elvencantation , @btsjojo && @happyvirus94 ヾ(＾-＾)ノ

Your top 10 biases?  

Listen, I stan so much groups. I only know my 3 ult biases, the rest is downhill. But If I had to choose it would be:

Lee Hongbin (VIXX)

Lee Jooheon (MONSTA X)

Oh Heejun Jeong Inseong (KNK)

Park Jinwoo (ASTRO)

Ma Jaekyung (ROMEO)

Im Jaebum (GOT7)

Kim Minjun (THE LEGEND)

Jung Daehyun (B.A.P)

Kim Jongin (EXO)

Kim Seokjin (BTS)

First group I listened to/liked? My first kpop group that I was into was apart of YG ent. and it was 2ne1 and BIGBANG

Do you prefer boy groups or girl groups? I don’t have a preference. As long as they make some nice b o p s, I’ll stan~ Favorite female group? It used to be 2ne1 but they’re gone and away from me *cries* but now I’ve been really loving Jelpi’s first girl group; Gugudan <3 Favorite male group? VIXX. It will always and forever be VIXX. Favorite female solo artist? Does Amber from F(x) count? I know she’s in a grou but she also has some solo singles;; Favorite male solo artist? Ah,, this is a hard one honestly. I don’t really have a favorite male soloist? It’s too hard to choose ;; Top 3 Groups? VIXX, Monsta X, KNK Favorite Kpop Song? Currently, according to my most played song on my phone, it is Like I Do by Romeo. (TRUST ME IT IS A FUCKING BOP I LOVE THAT SONG W ALL MY HEART BC IM SO WHIPPED FOR ROMEO)

Favorite happy Kpop song? Why are these questions so hard omfg. I like 1.2.3 by B.I.G bc it cheers me up, so there’s that. But oh my goodness, it’s so tough to choose.

Favorite Kpop sad song? Def any Love Letter by VIXX. (Is it considred a sad song??? Idk I love it and I’m sticking to my guts.)

Favorite Kpop smut song? Love Me Do - VIXX ;’)))000)

Favorite Kpop song of 2017 so far? Don’t Recall - K.A.R.D

Favorite debut? Forever KNK. The kind of memes. (and 12 hour long vlives)

Favorite debut of 2017 so far? Blanc7 , MVP, and 7′OCLOCK are all tied. (check them out, you won’t reget)

Favorite mv of 2017 so far? A Girl Like Me - Gugudan bc it is my definition of aesthetic™

Favorite mv? All VIXX mv’s are g.r.8™ tho??? If I had to choose,, it would probably be this.

Favorite album/mini album? Jekyll - VIXX (not bc they’re shirtless on the cover >>)

Favorite album/mini album of 2017 so far? Beautiful - MX (I KNOW IT HASN’T EVEN RELEASED BUT I KNOW IT’S GONNA BE MY FAVORITE DoNT @ ME)

Your ultimate bias? Lee Fucking Hongbin Favorite GIF of your ultimate bias?

*inserts every gif of hongbin on this website*

Favorite picture of your ultimate bias?

cr: BEANZIP (Chained Up Hongbin was the biggest blessing in my life)

Favorite thing about your bias? His smile warms my heart. His dimples is also a huge factor. But my favorite thing about Lee Hongbin is his dedication in VIXX. His personality is so unique. He looks out for others in ways that doesn’t make it too obvious. His everything is my favorite thing about him. I can never find an issue with this man. 

Was he your bias from the start? Oh how I wish he was; But sadly he wasn’t. Jung Taekwoon was~

Have you ever changed biases more than 3 times and in what group?  In VIXX I only changed from Leo to Hongbin and that was it. But I know for a damn FACT I have changed my bias in KNK more than 5 time a week. I’m such a sucker for good tol memes.

Favorite Ship? I’m gonna forever say Keo. My friend ( @jaehwans-thighs ) showed me this ship when I got into vixx and all I ever did was ship them. Close second would have to be HyukBin bc they’re the definition of a meme ship

Do you ship the “mom & dad” in your favorite group? They’re not my favorite ship but yes, I do ship Neo~

Who’s the mom and dad in your favorite group? Cha Hakyeon and Jung Taekwoon (also known as neo)

Who do you end up liking more in groups; Leaders, Maknaes, mood makers, vocal, rap, “mom”, “dad”, English speaker, drummer, guitarist, pianist?  It’s almost always the visual or the rapper. Rarely is it anything else. 

If your bias got a girlfriend/boyfriend how would you feel? I would feel joyful! I wouldn’t be upset at all! It’s their life. I’m only a fan~ As long as they’re happy, I’m happy. 

How would you feel if your bias came out gay/lesbian/bisexual/etc.? I would feel honestly so proud because they gained that confidence that I know takes time and effort to do. I know because being in the LGBT+ community, it can be difficult to be accepted. 

Do you think any kpop idols are gay/lesbian/bisexual/etc.?  Somewhat?

If so; who? Idk. I don’t really like guessing someones’ sexuality.

Favorite kpop blog?  everyone I meantioned here

Favorite kpop scenario blog?  I don’t have one. I don’t follow those times of blogs other than @bullet-proof-girlscouts

Favorite kpop smut blog?  I don’t follow up on smut blogs but everyone who contributed to the ‘hongbin smut’ tag are A++++ (def not bc I read from that tag only every week)

Favorite Kpop fanfic? I don’t really remember fanfics much. I have hella bad memory.

Favorite show with kpop idols? Running Man and ASC. But ASC hasn’t been the same like it used to a few years ago so idk ://

Do you prefer saying “Oppa” or being called “Noona”? I wouldn’t want to be called any because I’m not Korean.

Is it cuter when KPop Idols know your language or don’t know it and try to speak it?  Honestly, it brings me so much joy when they want to try speaking Spanish or English. I don’t mind if they know the language or not. As long as they want to communicate with us inernational fans, I’m fine with just having people translate for them~ They don’t have to go out of their way to learn a language they don’t want to just for fans. I want them to learn a language because they WANT to.

BIGBANG: “Bang Bang Bang” or “We like 2 Party?”

iKon: “#WYD” or “Rhythm Ta”?

Monsta X: “Perfect Girl” or “All in”?

BTS: “Save Me” or “Fire”?

EXO: “Monster” or “Growl?”

Astro: “Breathless” or “Hide&Seek”?

Red Velvet vs. EXID: “Ice Cream Cake” or “Up & Down”?

4Minute: “Crazy” or “Hate”?

NCT U vs NCT 127: “The 7th Sense” or “Fire Truck”?

Got7: “Just Right” or “Fly”?

Amber vs Ailee: “Borders” or “Insane”?

FTISLAND: “Take Me Now” or “Pray”?

History: “Queen” or “Might Just Die”?

KNK: “Knock” or “Back Again”?

Day6: “Congratulations” or “Letting Go”?

Block B: “Her” or “Toy”

ZICO: “I am You, You are Me” or “Boys And Girls”?

B.A.P: “Feel So Good” or “Young, Wild & Free?”

Seventeen: “Nice Very Nice” or “Adore U”?

Taeyeon: “I (feat Verbal Jint)” or “Why”?

G-Dragon Vs. Taeyang: “Who you?” or “Eyes, Nose, Lips”

BTS: “The Most Beautiful Moment In Life Series” or “Dark & Wild”?

Day6: “The Day” or “DAYDREAM?”

BIGBANG: “A” or “M”

Monsta X: “The Clan, Pt.1 ” or “Rush”?

Seventeen: “Boys Be” or “First Love&Letter”?

EXO: “Ex’ACT” or “Love Me Right”?

Astro: “Spring Up” or “Summer Vibes”?

Vixx: “Chained Up” or “Error”?

EXO or BTS?

SISTAR or Red Velvet?

NCT U or NCT 127?

Girls’ Day or Girls Generation?

Seventeen or GOT7?

Winner or iKon?

Block B or Beast?

Romeo or Astro?

Jimin or Jungkook?

Xiumin or Chanyeol?

Taeyeon or Ailee?

Jay Park or Dean?

G-Dragon or Taeyang?

Amber or Henry?

Wooshin or Hwanhee (up10tion)?

Jeonghan or Dino?

Taemin or Jonghyun?

Seulgi or Irene?

Got7: Markson or Markjin?

Red Velvet: JoyGi or WenRi

BTS: VKook or JiKook?

EXO: Hunhan or Kaisoo?

Monsta X: Showhyuk or Jookyun?

Topp Dogg: Hanjoo or Xenissi?

NCT: TaeTen or JaeYong?

Seventeen: Meanie or Jeongcheol?

iKon: Double B or Double J (Junhwan)?

[pandabearlikes]

Temporary Affairs II

Table of Contents 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13

a/n: make sure you read through entire chapter ;)

Chapter o6. Self-ie-conscious 

  The second day babysitting Youngwoo was a little better.  He didn’t randomly cry or anything but you also barely picked him up out of fear that you’d hurt him.  The fifth day he was all giggly and active, flailing his little limbs for you to cradle him, so you sucked in air and lifted him slowly into your embrace.  He whimpered a bit at first, startling you.  But you stayed still with him against your chest until gradually he hushed.  By the second week, you thought that you were actually starting to get the hang of things as soon as you stopped freaking out. 

  You dusted your hands off after spreading baby powder all over Youngwoo’s diaper area to prevent him from getting any rashes.  The little baby moved his arms around happily.  Smiling, you patted his little cheeks and lifted him up to place him back into the comfort of his little cradle.  And like a pro, you instantly pressed on the mobile. Soft melodies played in the background as the toy mobile spun above Youngwoo, causing him to giggle gleefully.  Not only was Youngwoo happy, so were you because it gave you sufficient amount of time to clean up the mess on the changing station. 

  When you returned from the restroom, Youngwoo was already fast asleep.  Giggling joyfully yourself, you plopped yourself down on the rocking chair for your much needed break.  As you slowly drifted off to lalaland, a soft beep from your phone sounded.  Sluggishly, you pulled the device out from your pocket to see who dared disturb your beauty sleep.  As soon as the screen lit up, you narrowed your eyes.  Someone had friended you on Facebook…and that someone was none other than Lee Sohee.  You stared at the request.  Was this a battle challenge?  If I rejected then it may seem as if I’m scared of her.  But if I accepted, then things might get ugly super fast.  You bit your nail in debate, weighing the pros and cons. 

  “Nope, not gonna friend you, biotch,” you concluded out loud after five minutes.      

  While your fingers dwelled over the “ignore” button, Youngwoo’s thunderous cries frightened you, causing you to lose your grip over your phone.  Grimacing, you leaned over to clumsily catch the device.  Whew.  But your eyes immediately widened at the screen.  In the mist of saving your phone, you had hit “accept”.  Omg.  Crap.  Crap.  Crap. Not again… 

  Youngwoo’s sobs continued to grow.  Priorities, _______ah!  You tossed the electronic onto the cushioned rocking chair and leapt off to rescue the baby from whatever monster that traumatized him enough to cause such ruckus.  And before you even reached the crib, you had already concluded from the tone of the cry that he was hungry.  So you skillfully U-turned to the kitchen to grab a warm bottle of milk. 

  As soon as Youngwoo was full and burped, you placed him on the automatic cradle by the rocking chair to lull him back to sleep.  Wiping the sweat from your forehead, you picked up the phone again and slouched back down into the heap of cushions and pillows.  Okay, great.  What now?  This was the second time you accidentally lured Sohee into a catfight through Facebook.  Should I unfriend her?  No, that’d be stupid, by now she’d probably already gotten the email saying you accepted. 

  “Fine, you want to be friends?  Let’s be friends then,” you concluded. 

  Broadening your shoulders and holding your chin abnormally up, you clicked on her profile.  You know…since you added her anyway, might as well stalk her a bit.  So she went to high school with Oppa…and college too?  Did that mean they dated or at least knew each other for a while?  You pouted a bit jealous that she knew Jongin for almost a decade longer than you did.  But Oppa said they didn’t have an intimate relationship. 

  Just as you were about to look through her photo albums, the front door opened.  Gasping, you instantaneously hid your phone behind your body to wait for the two men to show up.  Jongin and Sehun were already chatting enthusiastically with one another before entering the baby’s room. 

  “Hey!” you greeted, as soon as they appeared at the doorway. 

  “Hey!” Sehun replied then squatted down to look at the now awaken Youngwoo in his little mini cradle. 

  Your husband extended his arms out and you knowingly jumped into his chest.  He chuckled joyfully at your much more euphoric mood as compared to the first time you babysat Youngwoo. 

  “Did Young-ie cause a lot of trouble today, _______?” Sehun asked, picking his son up into his arms.   

  “Nope.  He was a total sweetheart today!” you said truthfully. 

    In the car, you suggested to get some ice cream since the weather was so hot.  As always, Jongin happily compiled to your sudden cravings.  Midway to the ice cream parlor, a light bulb lit in your head.  Internal evil cackle.

  “Just order one, Oppa.  We can share!” you excitedly proposed.

  By the look on your husband’s face, you were sure he caught on that something was fishy.  But he nodded and got out of the car to order the desert for you.  Taking out your phone, you resumed stalking Sohee’s photos.  Hmm…she did have a good sense of style…even in high school.  You recalled your terrible walk-into-closet-and-pick-whatever-clothes-weren’t-in-the-laundry tactic you had back in high school and cringed. 

  A knock came from the car window and you looked up from your hobby to see Jongin had returned.  Eep.  You quickly exited out of the application and leaned over to unlock the door for him. 

  “Here you go, Jagiya,” he spoke, holding the strawberry ice cream cone in front of you. 

  But instead of taking it, you grabbed a tissue and gently wiped the sweat off of Jongin’s face.

  “It must have been super hot waiting in line.  Sorry, Oppa,” you apologized sincerely. 

  “Don’t worry about it,” he chuckled, holding the ice cream out for you again.

  This time you took it. 

  “Oppa, let’s take a picture,” you suggested, holding out your phone. 

  With the ice cream in between the two of you, you directed for Jongin to lean in and lick the desert from one side while you did the same on the other.  Satisfied with the positioning, you snapped the selfie. 

  “Here,” you shoved the ice cream to your husband.  He looked at you amused but took it so that you could focus on your task of selecting the prettiest filters and bokeh for the couple picture.  In between your contemplating whether to add a border or not, Jongin held the treat up to your lip so you could enjoy it before it completely melted.  Without taking your attention from your phone, you stuck your tongue out and licked the ice cream.  Jongin shook his head at your silliness. 

   Pleased with how the picture came out, you posted it on Facebook with the caption, “Ice cream kiss with hubby”.  You finished your mischief by tagging your husband in the picture.  Pftt…what do you think Lee Sohee?!?!

 _________ _________ : 1    Lee Sohee: 0!!!  Bwhahahahaahhaaha. 

  “What so funny, Babe?” Jongin asked, feeding you the rest of the ice cream. 

  “Ohh, nothing,” you replied but failed to hide your naughty grin. 

  Jongin pinched your nose but didn’t grill you further, grateful to witness your uplifted mood.   

-----

  For the next few days, you were obsessed with taking pictures of you and Jongin together.  Whether you were simply eating dinner, or out on a date, or even just snuggling together, you snapped a selfie, added blinding effects and filters, and posted it up for Lee Sohee  the world to see. 

  But for some reason, that one homecoming picture of Jongin and his ex engraved permanently in the back of your mind.  So to counter it, you continued to indulge in your new hobby.  You took pictures of Jongin in his office, in his car, watching television, sleeping, and even in the shower.  Yes, in the shower. 

  Cackling naughtily, you turned the knob and barged into the bathroom. 

  “What is the world – “ Jongin asked, startled by your intrusion.

  Throwing up some bunny ear fingers, you said, “Smile!”

  Snap 

  Still giggling, you exited the restroom. 

  A few hours later as you were busy stuffing chips into your mouth and chatting over the phone with your best friend, Bang Minah, your husband came in looking a bit flustered.

  “Jagiya, why did Kyungsoo-hyung send me a text saying that my buttcrack is on Facebook?” he asked, raising his brow. 

  The bag of chips fell from your hands. 

  “Hello?  _______ah?  Hello?” Minah said through the phone.

  “I’ll call you back later,” you said and hung up. 

  Scrambling, you climbed over the bed to the computer to examine the pictures you posted.  And there it was, an inch of your husband’s booty managed to show up in the shower picture without you knowing.  No, no, no!  Crap.  You immediately clicked “delete”. 

  “No!  No one in this world is allowed to see my hubby’s precious butt but me!” you said under your breath.

  Beside you, your husband shook his head and gave you a light smooch on the cheek. 

    -----

Chairs flipped and tables screeched.  You held your back, bending over to scoot the furniture even further.  With a towel over his damp hair, Jongin walked in curiously. 

  “Babe, be careful!” your husband shouted, tossing the towel on the floor to support you before you fell over.

  “Hehe,” you giggled but Jongin was not amused.

  “What are you doing?” he asked, his arm still holding tightly against your waist.

  “Um, just moving things around…” you beat around the bushes.

  “For…”

  “For pictures…” you finally admitted. 

  “For…” he continued to grill.

  You squirmed in his arm and changed the subject, “Oppa, go dry your hair first then I’ll tell you”.

  Waddling, you physically scooted him to the bathroom so he would leave you alone to remodel the room for your photo shoot.  However, Jongin always had the ability to persuade you into ditching your plans to fool around with him. 

  Sitting on a chair, he stared up at you like a little puppy as you towel dried and wrung the water out of his hair for him.  You tried your best to avoid eye contact but the little puppy kept tugging on your sleeve so you caved.  His eyes glimmered back at you like shining stars.  Gahh I’m gonna faint.  Trying your best to hide you foolish grin, you shoved the towel back to Jongin and backed up to leave but he looped his arms around your belly.  You giggled, wiggling in his grip as he continued to suffocate you with his little aegyo stunt.  He pulled you by the neck so you puckered your lips awaiting a kiss but instead he shook his wet hair causing droplets to cover all over your face.   

  “Oppaaa,” you whined.  He laughed, making up by pecking you all over your face.

  You gave in and continued to dry his hair with a blow dryer.  The whole time, he still continued to smile at you with that goofy grin of his and each time he did so, you’d melt a little on the inside. 

  Finally, after ten minutes, your husband released you back to your room to prepared your makeshift stage.  Pushing all the furniture to the side, you hauled in bags and bags of curtains, laces, and fabrics.  With a flick of the hand, the fabric unrolled in front of you like a Hollywood red carpet.  As you tiptoed to hang the curtains, a wild Kim Jongin showed up at the door to offer help.  And even though you wanted it to be a surprise, you gave in and invited him into the room again. 

  “Can I know what you’re doing now?” he asked, easily hanging the curtains up due to his taller physique. 

  You pouted childishly, rubbing you protruding tummy. 

  “I wanted it to be special,” you said bitterly.

  “What’s ‘it’?” your hubby asked.

  “Maternity photoshoot,” you finally admitted. 

  The earlier confusion on his face softened into a tender smile.  He walked over, taking both your hands into his. 

  “It can still be special, even if it’s not a surprise.  In fact, can I be part of it?” he asked.

  Your eyes lit up and you questioned, “Really?  You want to be in it?” 

  “Of course,” he sincerely replied. 

  “Okay,” you said, looking at the floor shyly. 

  So for the rest of the preparation, you got to comfortably sit on the rocking chair while Jongin setup the background, lights, and cameras.��

  The original gray curtains were replaced with beautiful lace and crystal ones that refracted light in all different directions.  The floors were lined with tulle and silk, creating a Heavenly, cloud-like environment.  You changed into a flowy white dress and flower crown while Jongin contrasted in a black dress shirt and white tie. 

  For the first half of the session, Jongin transformed into a professional photographer, directing you to stand in different spots.  With your wispy hair framing your face, you turned at a perfect ¾ angle, with one hand over and one hand under your belly.  Snap  A succession of bright flashes of light captured the serene moment while Jongin continuously pressed the shutter button.  When that was over, the handsome photographer sat down on the floor to admire his work of art. 

  Excitedly, you skipped over and joined him.  He slipped his arm around your shoulders and happily handed the camera to you.  Gasping in awe at his breathtaking photography skills, you swore you felt liquid begin to cloud your eyes. 

  “It’s so beautiful,” you unconsciously spoke.

  “You’re so beautiful,” Jongin corrected. 

  You turned around with teary eyes and he automatically placed his lips on yours.  His fingers stroked your hair, bringing you closer to him.  And in that moment, you wished with every part of your body for time to stop forever.  But his lips eventually separated from yours.  You greedily leaned in for another quick peck.  Oppa, I really love you.  Please keep me around…even…if I’m not good enough. 

  “I will try to be good enough,” you said in an inaudible whisper as your forehead leaned against his.

  “What did you say?” Jongin questioned but you shook your head. 

  Taking the camera from your hands, your husband pressed a few buttons and placed the camera onto the tripod before joining you by the windowsill for a couple shoot.  Smiling shyly, you held his hand as it looped securely around your pregnant waist.  Snap  Several more shots followed with different themes and poses. 

  When Jongin went to fix something with the lights, you sat down to look through the gorgeous photos.  Never in your life did you think you’d get the chance to have a maternity shoot, much less with such an attractive other half.  Stopping on a picture of Jongin kissing your tummy, a teardrop fell onto the screen and you quickly wiped it away before your husband saw.  You’re not sure why lately you’ve become so emotional.  Perhaps, it was the preggo hormones…or maybe it was something else that had been bothering you for a while now…

  Rubbing your tummy, you quietly asked, “Do you think Appa would keep me even if he realizes I’m not mature enough to be your mother?” 

  A light kicked answered and you blinked back tears. 

  “Jagiya, it’s fixed,” Jongin informed, motioning for you to go back to your position. 

  When you stood up, you finally realized your right leg was asleep when it buckled causing you to stumble forward.  Immediately, your child’s father rushed forward to support you. 

  “Jagiya!  I told you to be careful!  You’re a mother now, you have to watch your steps or you’ll hurt our daughter,” Jongin scolded. 

  With teary eyes, you looked up at him.  His angry expression instantly unstiffened.

  “Sorry…” you apologized, biting your lip. 

  “No, Honey, I didn’t mean it that way,” he corrected.

  “No, it’s fine,” you assured, feigning a smile. 

  Unwinding your hand from his, you slowly walked over to the window again.  Your husband followed shortly after.  And as you stared into his deep black eyes, you got your answer.  So you held him a little closer, sniffing in his scent, and remembering the feeling of having his arms around you.  Just in case…you think.  Just in case.  Jongin grinned widely, oblivious to the toxic thoughts that raided your mind. 

  As the skies grew dark, Jongin began to move the furniture back into position.  Sitting on the edge of the bed with your legs swinging around like a little girl, you watched as the moonlight casted beautiful laced floral prints against Jongin’s face.  Taking out your phone, you secretly snapped a few candid shots of him.  You know…just in case. 

  Sniffing back tears, you requested, “Oppa, can we take one more with my phone?” 

  He stopped what he was doing, turned around, and nodded.  Setting the timer on your phone, you placed it onto the tripod and dashed to rejoin Jongin.  Midway, you slowed down, mentally cursing at yourself for forgetting to be careful once again.  With your forehead against his and arms around his neck, the phone camera flashed brightly capturing the precious moment.  And instead of posting it on Facebook like what your husband expected you to do, you changed it as your phone wallpaper so you could stare at it every time you missed this feeling…you know…just in case there wasn’t a next time…             

      a/n: Le sigh.  The ending of this chapter gets me every time.  There’s this melancholy feeling at the thought of a super bubbly person turning depressed as compared to an originally pessimistic person having these negative thoughts…it’s as if her wings got clipped off. ಥ ̯ ಥ

  Are you guys ready for tomorrow’s chapter?  It’s that chapter I cried my eyes out writing and actually had to decrease the angst/change the chapter at 4AM in the morning because it got too sad for my kokoro. 

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