#+too. and itd be worse cause id be the owner or whatever | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

yaikat · 4 days ago

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i love joining servers and communities and shit thinking im gonna make new friends there only to realize that im gonna be the outcast and ill eventually stop talking out of awkwardness and depression. its almost like im meant to be alone

#and the best thing of all is that of course i believe im the bad person for doing this. like sorry for making my depression other peoples+#+problems. sorry for thinking i had an opportunity and now im a burden to everyone including myself #i even thought man maybe i could make my own server of this thing or a fun project but then i thought nah. im gonna feel alienated there+#+too. and itd be worse cause id be the owner or whatever #theres only been one time where doing this actually helped me in a way. where i realized i actually didnt like these people and they didnt+#+like me either. i guess i gotta thank my depression for that i guess i dont fucking know.#i just want the opportunity to meet people like me and not feel out of the group the second we talk for more than 5 seconds. sigh #whatever. ill delete this and all the other vent posts later tonight cause theyve been piling up and as pathetic as i am i do not want them #to stay longer than they should #delete later

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