#+ my experiences too like I’m still mad how she was about HS ppl trauma I remember 2 ppl & 1 hurt me so much more than the other and she
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Last Seen Blogs
Text
TFW you thought you hated laughing bc of specific bad experiences/people & then you remember a childhood/childhood memories & ur just like..... oh
#thoughts#oni talks#I remember this memory from when I was really little#I think I was in kindergarten or 1st grade#& my mom had me in my room to do homework & ofc as an undiagnosed adhd child I was very much not doing my homework#& then she got really angry and came in my room#& I had a stuffed animal & I rememebr I don’t know how I moved to where I was but I was for some reason by the lamp in my room#& I just remember she was hitting me with my stuffed animal bc she was angry w/ me#& I was laughing & she got even angrier bc I was laughing & did more#I don’t really remember what happened after & tbh the memory is really hazy#I remember I think I brought it up to my sister once and she said it was never that bad except she wasn’t even there for that memory lol#convenient how most of my memories are ones that my siblings and my dad aren’t present for lol#well some of them are but I think tbh my sister just blocks i out memories#I remember bad things happening to her that she doesn’t even remember#she forgets what’s happened to me or minimizes it tbh idk she’s weird#she’s like talked about how I’m the way I am bc environment/experiences except then she doesn’t even like back my memories??#+ my experiences too like I’m still mad how she was about HS ppl trauma I remember 2 ppl & 1 hurt me so much more than the other and she#just completely said the other was sooo much worse and he wasn’t that bad & what happened wasn’t that bad etc etc#idk anyway I remembered that memory idk why but that specific one comes back a lot & I guess I didn’t think about like#the effect it would have on my anxiety abt laughing? I mean my mom(1ce sis) also comments on mine a lot & asks me to stop all the time#bc it’s mean of me & I mean tht got backed by others too & also tht I laugh too much which I do & I hate it I used to not laugh at all#I’ve been really giggly when I hangout with friends recently & I hate it because like 1 person I’m okay being like tht with but the others#are kinda new/not comfy & tbh I get giggly at nothing sometimes or I laugh too much like I’ve laughed for over an hour b4 like I’m equally#I’m equally likely to not laugh at something I find hilarious as I am to laugh for like an hour straight or just giggle like an idiot 2 much#idk was thinking abt it bc of the friends usually I’ve had push to talk on so they don’t hear me laugh but I’ve had voice on for games#not dnd so I don’t interrupt with laughing also I still remember tht time I actually got in troubled for laughing too lol#also tht one time when I was playing dr evil & someone thought my laugh was me practicing my evil laugh :/#there’s like 1.5 ppl that have actually complimented my laugh I’m probably being dramatic but I’m pretty sure everyone else hates it lol#idk I hate it bc I feel so out of control in the games bc i feel good so I get giggly @ nothing but I can’t giggle so I have to hide it :/
0 notes