#< the yet is a joke i am not going to punch you unless you present your face purrectly befur me and demand i punch it into smither33ns &g

[mochuelovelli]

Fix-It AU for the Moonvasion Arc!

I would like to preface this by saying that this is gonna seem real fanfic-y and for that I am sorry. I want to bullet point some ways to change some aspects of S2 from Whatever Happened to Donald Duck?! onwards.

Whatever Happened to Donald Duck?!:

The segment that shows the McDuck/Duck family tree has Donald Crossed out not because he is captured but Lunaris PLANNED to kill him before going to Earth once he would basically tortured him for information

Donald is tripped by Lunaris which makes him land on Penumbra, allowing him to sneak the device under his hat as it falls off without Lunaris noticing. After Lunaris explains his plan he throws Donald and the scene transpires as normal, save for Don attaching the clamp to Lunaris and finding the remote. 

Lunaris still ends up getting the upper hand and punching Don away but he reveals the remote and presses it. Only for it to, of course, get broken on impact and the rest of the scene transpires normally.

[Here is the biggest change]The rocket DOES end up exploding. It makes it to Earth's atmosphere but of course the bullet hits one of Scrooge's satellite and rickashays back to the moon again. Upon realizing he is going to crash, Donald jumps out but just in time as the blast from the pod knocks him semi-conscious.

Last shot is him falling toward a crater and shows Donald gaining conscious only for him to see he is falling into the moonmite's mouth but doesn't reach beyond making a groan and the scene cuts to black with the jaw snapping sound (alternatively it can just cut to black as he falls)

The Jones Scene ends with Scrooge saying the same line about not paying Donald bills. Only he also adds once closing the door, "Fallacious tightwad, I ain't payin' for some leeching city counselor. I'll find that lad a proper therapist when he gets back. One that doesn't have an arachnoid infestation." *cue spider coming to crawl on Scrooge's face before he chucks it off*

Webby's line is cut down to "Well I guess there really wasn't some big mystery to solve." But the kids' lines stay the same frome there on.

Scrooge gets only Donald screaming "Uncle Scrooge!" before the audio cuts to audio to one of Mrs. Crackshell-Cabera's novelas due to the satellite being damaged(does that make sense? No but neither do moonpeople). You could probably make a suggestive joke here about cruises and Scrooge's line can stay the same. The camera pans up as the line is delivered still but it is just a shot where the moon is in focus. That or it's the satellite falling instead.

Happy Birthday, Doofus Drake! until Moonvasion:

(know it would be a pain in the ass, but I think it be cool to edit the intro to remove/replace Donald during the time he isn't shown in an ep. Though I guess they don't change the intro until season 3 so yeah. Mainly wanted to give the illusion that he is "missing" to scare anyone under 8 that "oh no maybe he is GONE gone just to be a prick

The Golden Armory of Cornelius Coot!

Trim down the Bigtime C plot like a LOT. Maybe end that original scene with Ma Beagle by having Bigtime lean on something (statue, standing on some "moss") and fall down to the caves. 

The cart scene with Bigtime still happens but that cut back from Launchpad and Della doesn't happen until after Della yells at Launchpad when she is flying. (So not the scene where Louie is kicking rocks)

Maybe cut the scenes where Bigtime is bragging about "finding a name for himself" and just have one scene where he ties up the boys and saves his family but they argue and waste time til Della and Webby come back. The end where Ma says BT is welcome back is cut as well, she just says it and then complains about the popcorn

After the scene with LP, Della and Webby, the camera pans up to the sky so a transition to the moon happens. Transition zooms out to reveal Penumbra looking at the Earth with her spear, before she turns upon hearing the moonmite screech and readys herself.

The moonmite is then shown crawling up from a hole at first by itself before Donald's torse is revealed, his hair is a bit longer and feathers are ruffled. Penumbra stands down and looks a bit more open before asking "Did anyone see you?" 

Donald just says no before hopping off, of course falling along with the equipment he brought. The shot is focused on Penumbra looking towards Donald's silhouette as he gets up.

She then asks "How's the leg?" To which the camera cuts back to Donald and we see him in full view, his model is similar to when he is on the island only way less beard and his hair isn't quite as long yet. But the most notably difference is that his right leg from the knee down is now a golden prosthesis. Don responds with "Fine, thanks for making it for me."

Penumbra turns back as Donald is shown to clumsily put the equipment on a nearby table and says "I couldn't have forgiven myself if I let Della's brother die." Donald nearly falls over again before she turns to face him and asks if he is ready to which he nods before they turn and the camera reveals the broken Spear of Selene. Penumbra's voice is heard then saying "Then Let's get you home." Before the ep ends.

The Richest Duck in the World!:

Everything is the same except when Penumbra calls, She says "This is LT. Penumbra calling for her friend Della Duck!-" [Della's Line] "All of your defense satellite just went down for some reason. Della-" Familiar quacking can be heard and Della even questions it before Donald's voice comes on. "Della!" "Donald!" Della parrots as she grabs the SATCOM box. "There's going to be an invasion! He's coming for the kids!" Episode ends the same from here.

[I'll make a second post l8r since I planned this to come out before 10 and it's already almost 1130 so yeah. Literally all these changes are basically to set up a bit of a stronger connection between Della and Donald (as well as giving Donald more screen time) by having the twins mirror each other a bit more. I personally headcanon that like Donald, Della is unlucky as well but in a different way. Where Donald has bad luck everyday of his life which mostly comes in the form of physical harm (secondly it would be emotional harm), Della's bad luck comes in the form where she is just as "lucky" as the rest of her family (maybe discounting Louie) but while she enjoyed 20ish years of adventuring relatively unscathed, she then crashes on the moon after a freak storm happens and is stuck there for over a decade. To me, her struggles on the moon in Whatever Happened to Della Duck?! And The Golden Spear! really showcases her bad luck, almost as if the universe decided to throw the biggest karma bomb at her all at once. But just like her brother she is fuelled with determination and love for her family in order to survive anything, she just has to do it all by herself (another thing which is worse for her bc she doesn't have them) at that point. And it isn't a one and done thing, it's something permit as she now is literally 11 years behind on parenting and the show continues to show her stuggle with that. By having Donald lose his leg and have a journey back to his family that's quicker than Della's (along with having company from nearly the beginning) it parallels that unluckiness the Duck twins have. It also can serve as a plot for future eps (well fake eps lmao). 

Ik that this au wouldn't have been possible as Disney would be really anal about having one of their mascots have a total design change. Unless they really wanted to milk having characters with prosthetics for park days or whatever, maybe it wouldn't be THAT big of a deal aside from some fluff articles. I realize though, it might overshadow Della's trauma so ideally I would hope to figure out or map out an ep where it would be addressed along with some other family issues.] 

[amazildoessomethingstupid]

January Rant: Ice Cream Therapy

Hello everyone, I am Lieutenant Amazil.  Now I know you might know me as that guy who rants and tears apart chapters in BCB. But today  we will be doing something a little different.

That’s right boys, we’re doing a January rant!  And we will be going over one of my personal favorite scenes in all of January.  A scene that I put a lot of thought and heart into, in wanting to make it work.  When I hear people say that January is hate-filled and is just an insult to BCB, this scene is one of the few that I turn to and say that it is not hate-filled.  This is where January shows its true purpose and colors, and gets into the groove.  This scene I’m going to be talking about is what I call the “Ice Cream Therapy” scene.

For context, this is the scene that comes right after Lucy’s suicide attempt in January.  Susan just saved Lucy, and now they’re in an ice cream shop and trying to figure out what the hell they’re going to do now.  You can tell just from a glance that a lot of care was put into the scene because it is the most detailed background I’ve done for January (and probably since).  This scene and this moment is when the comic starts to shed off its adherence to the canon and its timeline, and starts to stand on its own and say what it means to say. It’s only 5 pages long, but it uses those pages to talk and bring up so much.  Starting with setting up how the characters feel and what the situation is.

Susan is honestly lost as to what to do in the situation, and decides that they need to seek help, but Lucy is scared to tell anyone about what she tried to do.  Making this conflict, as Sue wants to tell an adult, but Lucy doesn’t want to tell her parents.  So Sue compromises and decides to go with a random adult who will be able to help them.  A professional to help them!

And the page ends with one of my favorite jokes from this comic.

A nice little joke with good expressions that illustrate that Susan isn’t trying to be snarky about it, and helps ease the tension of the scene.

But Lucy brings up good points, and this part helps to show some concerns a lot of people who have suffered a traumatic event have.  Concerns that might keep them from getting the help they need, but Sue being the voice of reason here explains that even if the counselor doesn’t give them what they want, it’s worth taking the step to try.

This scene is meant to show the dynamic between Lucy and Susan, that will follow through and sets up the entire message of January.  Susan is supportive of Lucy, she feels responsible for trying to get her the help she needs, but there is a reoccurring message about how no matter what Lucy has to decide these things and what to do, herself.  There is only so much that Susan can do, and so much support she can give to Lucy, but unless she herself accepts it and tries to make herself better.  It will be all for not.  

And once she says yes, they start to move the ball and finally take the first step and go in the right direction.  

However, that’s not the only thing going on in this scene.  There is more.

Now a keen eye might see where I’m going with this.  But for those who haven’t read January yet, (first of all shame on you!) Susan is referencing Paulo’s kiss backstage with Lucy.  Except that in January, it went a little differently.  

You see, in January instead of Mike being in the play Susan did a quick swap out and instead got Paulo to do the part instead.  Lucy was still pretty depressed at this time, as Mike’s plan of switching tables came to fruition.  Now if you’ve read the canon, you’d know that the play had very little bearing over the course of the comic’s future.  And Paulo’s kiss backstage was just an odd headscratching moment that only lead to him doubting himself and planting the seed for Paulo to start to pine for Lucy.  But in January, because Paulo being in the play and Paulo is Paulo, he messes up the entire play hilariously.  And because of this…

Lucy who was depressed, starts to snap out of it.  

She’s confused, but decides to roll with it, and have fun.  And it seems that she is going to be okay.  

The entire play is a farce, and in comic it’s meant to be played for hyucks, but it is also a momentary reprieve because we as fans knew how Lucy really felt during this part in the canon.  We know how bad it was, and seeing her happy, genuinely happy and just laughing gives it a refreshing twist.  

And it doesn’t end there, as Paulo and Lucy go backstage and block the door to stay safe from Susan.  Another funny concept, where Lucy is starting to be herself again.

It’s a very fun scene, that shows the chemistry between the two characters and gives us a look into how Paulo could’ve helped Lucy in his own way.  

Paulo’s views and demeanor shows another approach to Lucy’s problem.  And how he would deal with it, saying fuck it, I don’t care!  

His message to Lucy is that no matter what shit is going down, no matter how bad tomorrow may be, today is alright.  And that Lucy should enjoy what she has right now and enjoy the present.  Before tomorrow takes it away.  Live in the moment, and it resonates with Lucy especially since she was feeling pretty down earlier but rolling with the punches and saying fuck it helped to break her out of that.

Paulo gives his words of encouragement in his own Paulo way, and Lucy really appreciates it.  And then…

THAT is when the kiss happens.  But before we can enjoy this ship setting its sails, we are hit with a curve ball.

Lucy asks a question that comes out of nowhere.  Seemingly random and leaving us just as confused as Paulo.

Even more confusing and concerning, is Lucy’s response.  What did she mean by that?  Was she not into it?

What did she mean by that?  Well right after this scene is Lucy’s suicide attempt, but...

That brings us back to the ice cream scene where Susan is bringing it up again to get answers to what happened.  

Again, one of my favorite comedic moments in January.  Serving to give us some nice comic relief to counterbalance the seriousness of the subject matter and discussion they had prior.  It also shows how seriously Susan cares for Lucy in this situation, even before she attempted suicide.

That’s when we see the scene again, from Lucy’s point of view.  And what she was thinking.  

You see, in January I could’ve cut the entire play.  In fact, I wanted to at some points.  But I saw an opportunity to turn what frustrated me and seemed pointless (Paulo’s kiss and the play) into something with more substance to it.  

We get a full understanding for what Lucy was feeling, and why she did the kiss, what it meant to her, and why she asked that question.

I saw an opportunity to expand on Lucy’s character, and her feelings and why she did what she did.  And so the kiss, instead of being a red herring that meant nothing…

Turned into the breaking point for Lucy, in having this self-realization.

It changes what was a very sweet and nice scene between two characters, into a bittersweet moment (no pun intended) that Lucy ruins herself.  

She really was happy, she really did like Paulo.  She did have feelings for him, in the heat of the moment.  But her feelings betrayed her, and she didn’t want to use Paulo. She didn’t want to hurt him the way that Mike hurt her.  She didn’t want to lead Paulo on, and so she lied and broke it off there.  That’s when she lost all hope, and attempted suicide. It wasn’t just because of Mike, it was because of herself.  In that moment, she saw herself about to destroy someone who gave her a last bit of happiness. And she couldn’t live with that.

But now Susan is here, and she’s going to be strong and help Lucy as much as she can.

And together they’re gonna fix this mess one step at a time.

It’s also followed up even later in the comic where Paulo asks Lucy about what happened.  And we get a laugh as Paulo thinks his kiss was so bad it drove her to suicide.  

And in the end they have a good friendly laugh about it as everything’s explained.   Lucy is now a better person, and is able to enjoy herself kind of like Paulo wanted.  And all is right.

So you’re probably wondering, “Hey LT…Why you ranting about this chapter?  Why not go into the Daisy rant!  That was amazing!”  Well my friend, it was amazing.  One of the biggest highlights of January.  However, I wanted to bring up this scene in particular because…

Due to technical issues I didn’t post on Friday…

Which meant…

I had to read…

And you know why I had to talk about January’s take on the play kiss…

[mumbal33]

The Warrior Within

Dark, brooding, and burly, one-time badass Ronon Dex has come a long way since he first jumped through the Stargate. Now a trusted member of the Stargate: Atlantis team, Jason Momoa reveals that there’s more to Ronon than just his muscles…

By Byran Cairns, Stargate SG-1/Stargate Atlantis Magazine

Big guy. Big muscles. Big gun. Big attitude. There’s no denying these qualities immediately impressed Stargate: Atlantis viewers about Ronon Dex, a Satedan soldier from the Pegasus Galaxy who was implanted with a tracking device so the life draining Wraith could hunt him down. After easily getting the drop on Lt Col John Sheppard and Teyla Emmagan in the episode Runner, Ronan agreed to help them capture the infected Lt Ford if Dr. Beckett removed the alien mechanism under his skin. Realizing his potential as an ally against the Wraith, Sheppard later invited him to join his team and although they’ve slowly gained his trust and have been a positive influence on him, it has still been a difficult transition.

“To a certain extent, it has,” notes Momoa in his deep, gruff voice. “Ultimately, Ronon is still kind of a loner but has taken direction from Sheppard as long as he thinks it is right. That is the great part about him though. He’s military so he’ll still react and have that instinct within him but at the same time, he’ll still listen to commands.”

Since his inauguration, Ronon has been a key participant on multiple missions and the outings have given him the opportunity to connect with his team mates and adjust to his surroundings.

“Sheppard is Ronon’s commander but to me, he and Teyla are the only ones I can trust,” offers Momoa. “I go to Teyla for everything because Sheppard isn’t big on the emotional things. If I had a problem, I would go to Teyla because we’re both aliens. She’s like my sister. Shep is like my best friend through the whole thing. Weir is just my boss, I don’t know too much about her but at the same time, I respect her. Rodney is the brains and I’m the brawn and it will always be like that between us. I can kick his ass but he’ll outwit me. Beckett saved my life numerous times and in these episodes, you’ll see he’s probably saved me more than anybody. He is someone I trust and Beckett is like a good buddy now.”

The second season concluded with Ronon and McKay captured and cocooned onboard a hive ship awaiting either rescue of imminent doom. Among the Atlantis squad, those two are arguable the most polar opposite as McKay can be annoying and Ronon takes no crap. The unlikely pairing is a guilty pleasure and the new season sees them sharing even more screen time together while engaging in their trademark witty banter and scathing remarks.

“The upcoming Tao of Rodney is really good because there’s stuff where McKay is getting a lot of power and thinks he can beat Ronon,” reveals Momoa. “I’m like ‘Oh yeah? Want to take me on?’ And he’s like ‘Um no.’ It is still very much him eating all the time and me making fat jokes about him, McKay saying I’m not smart enough or I am his big friend with few syllables. He’s been calling me Caveman too and I call him fat ass. He’ll poke jokes at me or I will poke them at him but there’s a mutual respect. When it comes down to it, he’s saved my life and I’ve saved his. I am the Pitt Bull on the show and I can tear anyone apart. If McKay and me are bickering, I would chop somebody’s head off to save him.”

As the muscles on the series, Ronon’s special talent to intimidate, threaten, and kick some serious Wraith butt makes him better suited as a fighter rather than a peacemaker. Unfortunately, such roles can sometimes be limiting to an actor by not providing enough depth and development.

“Well, that is the character and the way he is,” defends Momoa. “You can’t expect him to get real emotional. That’s hard to write for. That is why in Sateda, there is a lot I don’t say but am suffering through. [Robert] Cooper and a lot of the crew guys were coming up and going ‘Wow! That was amazing!’ I don’t necessarily have to say anthing, but that doesn’t mean I’m not acting. As long as there are good things to chew on and you don’t have to ramble off all this mumbo jumbo like McKay. I would never want to say all theat sci fi garbage or Beckett with his doctor terms. I speak through my actions and the way I hold myself. I’m not the way Ronon is in real life so it is still fun to play but it is an an ensemble cast and they write for everyone.”

Luckily, Stargate: Atlantis has no intention of pigeonholing anyone and the talented writing staff has been shattering any preconceived notions by sprinkling juicy nuggets throughout season three for Ronon. The humorous Irresistible was such a case. With Atlantis somehow enthralled by a man named Lucius Lavin, Momoa was thrilled to see his tough guy alterego crack a smile.

“That was great, man,” he enthuses. “The night before, I was talking with my fiance, was a little intoxicated, and she’s making me laugh. I would go ‘Hhon! Hhon! Hhon!’ and it sounds like a motor. I couldn’t stop laughing. It was one of those giggles and the next day, I had to shoot this scene where I’m laughing and we’ve never heard Ronon laugh at all. I thought it would be great to be this big dumb animal and be, ‘‘Hhon! Hhon! Hhon!’. He just has this big, funny, annoying laugh. Irresistible was fun because I got to laugh and be goofy.”

Momoa also appreciated the series shifting from the Wraith-heavy adventures to something more light hearted.

“That is what is great about the show; we don’t take ourselves too seriously,” he admits. “The most serious character on the show is me. In that respect, Joe Flanigan plays the lead so great. He’s this unsung hero. I love the way everyone acts on the show and that it has that comedy element to it.”

However it was the recent Ronon-centric Sateda which truly excited Momoa. Once again, Ronon encounters the Wraith, returns to his home world, exposes his tragic past and vulnerable side while dealing with a dangerous present day threat.

“I had to do so much in Runner and this year, Sateda just blows it all away,” exclaims Momoa. “They finally gave me something to act with. Being an actor, I want dialogue. My guy doesn’t say much, but when he does… Sateda was an amazing episode and worth everything. We shot it as the third episode, it aired as the fourth, and it was like ‘Oh man! Now there’s not going to be anything! The rest of the season is going to suck!’ but it has been really good!”

According to Momoa, Sateda was probably the series’ most ambitious and time consuming production to date.

“Sateda was unreal,” he acknowledges. “I usually do four or five days per episode and if it is every day, it is with the whole group and I have little lines here and there. Sateda was a 12-day shoot when we normally shoot in seven. It was the biggest budget I think we’ve ever had and the most stunts and explosions. We’ve never had that many locations. I was exhausted. We basically shot a full-on movie in 12 days on a movie schedule.”

The experience was further heightened when Executive Producer Robert Copper stepped in to direct the episode.

“Robert was fantastic to work with,” praises Momoa. “I hadn’t talked to much with him before that. He’s a very quiet guy and I never go up to the office unless there is a serious problem. I came with my ideas and when I first met him, they were having a little meeting so I went in and gave him the hugest hug. I had to prove to him that I could act. He was there every scene, if I needed the set to be quiet, he would make sure they were. He gave me my time. Not to float his boat but he is definitely one of the top directors I’ve worked with on the show, let alone my career.”

Not exactly a big talker, Ronon’s right hook or his weapon shoved in your face speaks louder than words. Thankfully, outside of Stargate: Atlantis, Momoa kept in great shape on Baywatch Hawaii and North Shore. Neither series were as physical taxing as playing Ronon yet the gung ho actor immediately embraced that warrior spirit.

“When I was doing Baywatch Hawaii, my cousin was a big toe in surfing and now he’s a full-on stunt coordinator so I’ve done a lot of water stuff that has been pretty heavy in big waves,” says Momoa. “That was the only thing I knew. I had never really been in any fights and my manager is Japanese so I wanted to work with a stick. I basically did that for a bit and watched movies before I got the role. I watched tons of samurai and action movies, studying people’s body movements which is what actors do. I was finding my own way, incorporating them into the role, and listening to Bam Bam who is just a talented artist and can come up with a fight like that [snaps fingers]. We work well together because he’s not, ‘No, do it this way!’ He takes into account what you made for your character and how your body moves.”

For Momoa, that included laying off a previous injury which flared up early.

“I have bad knees, so grappling and going low are very hard for me,” he notes. “Runner just got me because we didn’t have the lighter guns so it was five-plus pounds and it was hammering on my right knee. At the end of the day, you soak in the bath, have some wine, pop some Advil, and you’ll be fine. But we established Ronon isn’t really a kicker and more of a head butt, punch kind of guy. The studio likes it and it is working well. Sateda did rip me apart because I had armor on too.”

Before the SG-1 spin-off geared up, most of the actors reportedly signed a five-year contract. Yet when asked whether he could imagine himself in the series for the long haul, Momoa momentarily pauses.

“Tough call. I don’t know if I would want to play Ronon for five years. Playing a character for four years is a little much for me so I’d like to move on. Ultimately, I’d like to be in movies. It’s kind of up in the air. This was a fantastic role and I’ve never played anything like it but not to expand or try other things would be selling myself short.”

Naturally, Momoa isn’t necessarily vying for those adrenaline charged parts.

“Originally, I did not want to be an action star,” he confirms. “I felt it was a trap I’d get into and it would come easy for me. I’m a pretty coordinated cat. I don’t want to be an action star because I don’t want to limit myself to anything.”

In the meantime, Momoa couldn’t be happier on Stargate: Atlantis. However, with only a handful of episodes to finish, he isn’t prepared to speculate on where Ronon is heading. Yet after adding his two cents on his imposing, dreadlocked character last year, the 27-year-old is hoping to fulfill a growing ambition on the series.

“I’d really like to do a story and have a credit for that,” says Momoa. “If I stay on the show longer, I’d love to do a director’s attachment where you sit down and go through the whole thing with him in post-production. I’d eventually love to be behind the camera, going through the dailies, editing, and enhancing what has been shot. I’d love to do that. Hopefully that may be possible next season.”