#&&char: Cheng Xiaoshi
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necrosin ¡ 1 year ago
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beijing is a crowded place and always has been / the sort of place where someone can disappear with ease / the sort of place where faces become blurred and no one has distinct features, anymore —— it's been a long while since he's lived here, since he was a boy ; everything lacks familiarity. everything about the city, that is / how is it that he's been convinced to make this trip, again?
oh, right : cheng xiaoshi.
isn't that the answer to everything, these days?
( don't think too hard about, don't peer too close, don't, do not, it's better for everyone if you maintain your distance like you always do and yet —— idiot. not often you call yourself that, hm?)
touristy stuff is par for the course visiting a new place / not that this is a new place to lu guang, but it's relatively new to cheng xiaoshi and years and different experiences and @fumalsamakah have worn away that old awareness and the FORBIDDEN CITY is a must—see ( ... ) apparently. cheng xiaoshi always seems to meld seemlessly anywhere he goes, body language languid and easy and perhaps people envy him for that —— lu guang finds that he envies their surroundings for beholding them, far moreso than cheng xiaoshi, himself.
he could watch him for hours / days / ages / wondrous and wonderful and it's worth it, traveling with him. many things are worth it with him. ❝ a picture will last longer, ❞ fully sardonic, acutely aware of irony for the sake of it as he continues sticking to the shadows, knowing full well that the sun will turn him bright red within moments if he were to give her a chance. for a moment it feels like the muscles of his face want to smile, and he cal feel his mouth tremor for a moment before settling again. neutral but vaguely fond ( only, only for cheng xiaoshi ) and he adds, quietly, ❝ mmm ( ... ) and qiao ling wanted some pictures. ❞
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anulithots ¡ 4 months ago
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Honestly nothing is better than char who doesn’t know the genre x genre self aware
YES. YES Exactly. (assuming you are the link click annon. <3)
Lu Guang and how he knows how everything will end, does whatever he can to prevent that ending, wants control over his future so that he can receive the perfect one, all for CXS to be in blissful ignorance.
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Cheng Xiaoshi, in his blissful ignorance, clings to his past with his parents, the warmth they had and the void they left behind, and with that how he attempts to give every person he embodies the perfect past he could never get, how he would try every last possibility to prevent the pain of others, the vicarious pain of himself, yet he cares too much, empathizes too much, so he'll do everything, he'll do too much, and even if he knew the genre like Lu Guang does, he wouldn't change how he acts, I imagine. If anything, it would only encourage him to try harder.
... which is why, I presume, that Lu Guang doesn't tell him.
And I'm not saying everything I could here. THere's sooo many layers to this.
In the way Lu Guang tries to keep every factor under control, every variable attuned and managed with utmost precision so that nothing can possibly go wrong.
In the way Cheng Xiaoshi, unknowing of how this will end, yet in full embodiment of what is, still tries to fix what he does know - the past - tries to prevent that pain in a more... adaptive way, with hyper-observance and empathy and lkjasdfkldsjafklds a
OKay the screenshots explain it better
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lkjadflkas okay so off the top of my head (I should really consult my notes) Cheng Xioashi wishes to fix other's pasts and give them a good ending in an attempt to partially comfort himself and his own broken past, to show himself - to vicariously experience, - that the joy he lost can be regained, preserved, and with his powers he can make that happen. Surely surely surely.
He is not aware of the genre he's in.
... kfdjajskld I tried writing nice but my brain is loopdelooping right now. My apologies.
Thank you for the ask! THis was fun to answer
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ravs6709 ¡ 4 months ago
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Fluid Like The Water - LG & CXS
Word count: 1.2k words
Or read on ao3 here!
Fic idea, prompt by @anulithots !! Cheng xiaoshi wears the dress he got in the chibi shorts, and lu guang sees him. Also feat: genderfluid cxs and secret third thing shiguang <3
Now I'm sure the intent on the prompt was just something short and silly, but unfortunately
1) because I've wanted to make a genderfluid exploration fic for a diff char for so long but never knew how to do it ← cis woman, and I dont think I'd be able to nail it twice so I've elected to do Lu guang pov except Overthinking
2) took a more Realistic Approach to what it's like being queer. Ignoring cultural impacts because I don't know what it's like there but either way theres going to be some amount of ignorance. And so it's not really that silly </3
Anyways hope you enjoy it anyway!!!
•~•~•~•~•~•
“Cheng Xiaoshi!” Lu Guang called out as he entered the photo shop.
No answer. He probably wasn't downstairs then. Maybe napping upstairs, or listening to music with those new pair of headphones Qiao Ling had recently gotten for his birthday a couple weeks ago.
Hopefully not—
He climbed the stairs, finding that their shared bedroom door was wide open.
“Che—”
He stopped. Cheng Xiaoshi had phone out as if to take a selfie, grinning and winking, one hand making a heart with his fingers. That, in of itself, wasn't too unusual, though the three of them rarely took photos of themselves ever since they'd first encountered the twins. Any pictures they wanted to keep as a memory were immediately printed to be put into their newly created shared scrapbook, and then promptly deleted off the camera.
No, what was unusual was what he was wearing. He'd seen that outfit; only once, during their group livestream, when Cheng Xiaoshi had unboxed his gift, and held up an extra large sized pink dress. He whined about it, during the stream and then even for a few days after, and Lu Guang had honestly been convinced that he threw it out given that he never referred to it again afterward.
The dress itself sat a little odd on him with his broader shoulders, but he was slender enough that it didn't look that awkward. It went to his mid-thighs and was simple, no cups that needed to be filled in or anything like that.
Cheng Xiaoshi whipped around at the sound of his voice, still technically in his pose but his charming demeanour had gone completely stiff.
Neither of them said anything in particular. Cheng Xiaoshi was probably in shock, while Lu Guang didn't really know what to say. A dress. Cheng Xiaoshi in a dress.
Abruptly, Cheng Xiaoshi's hand moved, holding his phone close as he seemed to type something on his phone. After about a minute, he shoved the phone at Lu Guang's face.
He stared at the image, then back up at Cheng Xiaoshi.
“I'm buying you a yellow sundress!” he said cheerfully, but Lu Guang knew full well whenever he faked enthusiasm.
His smile just a centimetre too wide, his voice a bit too high pitched. It was rare for him to be like this, he was usually open about most things that bothered him. He for the most part, only ever acted like this whenever he was reminded of his still absent parents.
“I don't have an interest in dressing like a woman,” Lu Guang said neutrally.
Apparently that had been the wrong to say: Cheng Xiaoshi’s expression completely shattered for all of a millisecond, invisible to anyone except himself, who had spent too long closely watching him.
“I'm buying it anyway!” Cheng Xiaoshi said, his smile growing even wider.
Lu Guang took in a breath, trying to figure out the best way to navigate these unstable waters. “We don't have the budget for it.”
“Ah, you're right,” he said, shoulders slumping. “it looks stupid on me.”
That's not what he had said at all. The brief moment Lu Guang had glimpsed before he'd ended up making his presence known, Cheng Xiaoshi had looked almost confident in himself. Clearly hadn't thought himself to look stupid, posing and taking a selfie.
Lu Guang had no idea what this was about, didn't know why Cheng Xiaoshi seemed to be dressing up as a woman all of a sudden—oh, was he wearing makeup, the pen on the table definitely belonged to Qiao Ling.
What Lu Guang did know was that his reaction had disappointed him. Maybe even hurt him.
“Cheng Xiaoshi. Why are you..?”
He laughed. “Playing dress-up? No reason, just wanted to see if I looked hot if I was a woman. Obviously it looks weird, given I don't have the right parts, y'know?”
“Don't be so crass about it.” And even that, he knew, wasn’t right. If he had been dressing for such trivial reasons, he wouldn't be all flighty about it. “This means something to you.”
“Pft,” was the sound coming out of him, deliberately casual.
“Cheng Xiaoshi,” he said. 
He took a step forward, taking the phone that was still loosely gripped in his hands and set it aside. He grabbed him by the arm and pulled him to sit on the bed. Just like that, the smile dropped.
“Sometimes I feel like a woman,” he said, which definitely weren't the words he'd been expecting to hear.
“Sometimes?” he asked. “What does that mean?”
He shrugged. “I don't even know myself. I just—do sometimes. Most of the time, I feel myself—a man. But sometimes I don't. I think.”
Even though he had a feeling of the answer, he still asked, “When did this start?”
A pause. “After diving.”
Lu Guang remembered some of their first dives, remembered the first time he’d informed Cheng Xiaoshi that the host body would be a woman.
(“I'm diving into a woman?” he asked, furrowing his brows, “Isn't that weird? What if I have to pee?”
“Why are you only now asking that.”
“It never came up! But if I’m gonna be a different gender, I’m gonna have different body parts!”
Lu Guang sighed. “You sit, okay? Don't make it weird.”
And then in the dive—a picture taken in a bathroom, the client having taken a picture of herself after doing her makeup—Cheng Xiaoshi had stared at the client's face, until Lu Guang reminded him he would miss the bus.
Throughout the dive, Cheng Xiaoshi complained about the feeling of heels, if so many women really had to wear them every day, and all sorts of other minor complaints.)
“Do you think it's a side effect?” 
After all, he knew that Cheng Xiaoshi would temporarily take on their identities and shoulder their memories. That he still had nightmares of the clients’ most traumatic moments.
Cheng Xiaoshi had never expressed this kind of sentiment before, not in the past, not in previous timelines.
“Maybe,” he murmured, "but it feels different.”
He wondered what was different. If it was a good thing or not.
“Do you want to take a break?”
“...you don't think something is wrong with me, do you?”
“I didn't mean it like that—”
“It's fine, really.”
Again, it seemed like Lu Guang was saying the wrong thing. He wasn't used to conversations where he had no idea what the outcome was meant to be.
“Cheng Xiaoshi,” he said slowly, trying to figure out where to go. “We can buy a dress for me too.”
“Woah, woah, woah,” Cheng Xiaoshi sputtered, “you don't have to do all that.”
“If it will make you more comfortable, then I won't mind. If you wish to… explore your feelings, that is.”
Lu Guang would do anything for him. Had already turned back time for him, more than once. Wearing a dress wouldn't be a big deal.
“But we don't have the budget—”
“A cheaper dress, then.”
“And what if I am a woman? Sometimes, that is?”
“Then I'll learn.” And then: “...you don't look stupid right now.”
“Oh really now?” Cheng Xiaoshi raised an eyebrow, genuine laughter dancing in his eyes. “Did I look hot or se—”
“You looked fine,” Lu Guang said with a roll of his eyes. “Just… you’ll figure it out.”
•~•~•~•~•~•
Lc taglist: @subrosasteath ,@anulithots
Want to be added/removed from the taglist? Just let me know!
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keii-starz ¡ 1 year ago
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astro-can ¡ 5 months ago
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small list of anime/manga/shows/series I’ve read/watched for future reference + fave char
bsd: ranpo and yosano
tpn: Ray
Kny: tanjiro
mha: todoroki
link click: qiaoling and Cheng xiaoshi
jjk: all the second years
sk8: reki
kaiju no 8: hoshino
sasaki to miyano: TASHIROOO
Hirano to kagiura: HANZAWAAAAAÀÄ
butai ni sake: oniwa and botan
horimiya: iura
castle in the sky
howls moving castle
spirited away
whisper of the heart
ponyo
Bllk: chigiri and gagamaru
Haikyuu: kenma and suga
tbhk: mitsuba
my living dead
hxh: kurapika
Given: hiragi
Oshi no ko: none
Tokyo revengers: takashi
windbreaker: suo
Yuri on ice: yurio
saniro boys: mizuno
The apothecary diaries: maomao and consort gyokoyou
hell's paradise: fuchi
spy x family
kimi no yoru ni fureru
not anime:
percy Jackson/heroes of Olympus: leo
marvel: nat and wanda
the remarried empress
orv: gilyoung and huiwon
school bus graveyard: Aiden and tay
hooky: dani and damien
voltron: pidge
magnus chase: alex
kane chronicles: sadie
harry potter
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dasuruwu ¡ 11 months ago
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Hi!
My name is Dana and I welcome you to my blog ♡(*>ω<)ω<*♡
Here I post anything I like and want (♡´▽`♡)
⋆ 。.。:+*˚。⋆୨୧˚ ˚୨୧⋆。˚ ⋆*+:。.。 
Like: women, soft aesthetic, cats, feminism
Dislike: rude behavior, sarcasm, problematic content
⋆ 。.。:+*˚。⋆୨୧˚ ˚୨୧⋆。˚ ⋆*+:。.。
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MY FANDOMS
Alien Stage
Link Click
Tokyo Revengers
Genshin Impact
etc....
MY OTP
Mizisua
Cheng Xiaoshi/Lu Guang
Bajifuyu
Sanmikey/Harumai
Luckae
Dainkae
Kaebedo
(yes I love Kaeya)
Cynari
Ittorou
MY FAV CHARS
Mizi, Sua, Luka, Hyuna, Ivan
Lu Guang, Qiao Ling
Sanzu, Chifuyu, Baji
Kaeya, Freminet, Itto, Gorou, Yae Miko
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Would love to see you as my mutual/follower!
o(〃^▽^〃)o
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evcryopeneye ¡ 3 years ago
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@indulgentia​​ dive back in time...
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“Look,” he began, like he was about to launch into a lecture, but, he didn’t have the energy to do it, instead, he popped open one bottle of beer, followed by the other. It was all he had to offer. Instant noodles and cheap beer. Between trying to keep his fathers store alive, and the debts he owed the landlord, there wasn’t room for luxury in anything. “The way I see it, there’s nothing you can, they're going to say what they want.” People spoke about him, lazy, couldn’t be bothered, lay about who did nothing. It bothered him, yet he would never show it.
“Life’s too short to give a crap about people who don’t care, even if its only a few people that do care, they care, that’s what matters.”
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hirokari ¡ 3 years ago
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i'd live for you.
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wc: 0.6k words || g: fluff, gn!reader || w: none! || a/n: check out these two asks for context!
Xiaoshi finds your lap oddly comfortable, and he finds it even more endearing that even when he'd mentioned he was clammy and sweaty (especially after having finished up a game of basketball with Luguang), you insisted for him to accompany you on your lap as you finally finished reading the last bit of your thick novel.
He stares up with pursed lips, relishing the way you rest your book on his chest, tapping an odd rhythm and playing with the material of his jacket as you read with eager.
Xiaoshi traces the edge of clouds with a finger pointed up at the sky, taking note of how absurdly fast the world moves when you really look up.
"D'you finish the book?" Asks Xiaoshi as he sets his hand back down to his side. The longer, more annoyed groan you let out again amuses the boy. "What? Was it that bad?" He jests.
There's a sudden groan that you emit, and you bend down to bury your face into the book.
"No," You say. "it was amazing." Your voice is muffled because you're still pressing your face against the pages of the book. Xiaoshi's brow twitches up as he takes the book, leaving your face to mush against his shirt instead.
It's silent for a moment as he reads the few final sentences written.
"Well, how romantic." He coos. "He died for her." Quiet, your cheek slides against his clothes as you face him. Discarding your book, he stares back at you just as intent.
"I find it more romantic if someone lives for you." Sighing, the cement suddenly feels cold against the back of your legs and you sit up, an embarrassed tinge of tint gracing your skin. It grows redder when the boy who rests his head on your lap laughs.
"Oh, Y/N." He chuckles. Red-faced, you pick the book up and shove it into his face, earning more giddy laughs. "Cheng Xiaoshi, please stop laughing." You plead.
"Okay, sorry." Although he does stop his humoring, you know very well he's masking a smile under the book you shove into his face.
"Just how stupid do you have to be to poison yourself? Saying it was enough proof of his love, but he didn't have to legit do it! You wasted a literal lifetime with her just so you could prove you'd die for her. We got the message when you'd fought for her despite the disapproval!" You're suddenly ranting, thrashing your arms here and there. "And she's really crying? Because of his death? You're the one who asked if he'd die for you! What did you expect when you saw the vial in his hand?!"
"I'd live for you, I hope you know that." Xiaoshi's words are sudden and they hit you with such emotion and shock, the breath is knocked out of you-- as if the whole lecture about dying for another didn't strain the air out of you enough-- and you're left to stare at him.
There are no traces of jest or lies behind his eyes. Just an emotion you'd never seen him wear before.
"I..." You trail off. "-I know you would."
Xiaoshi yelps when you poke his side, rolling off your lap to brace himself. Your laugh is uncontainable-- especially after watching his reaction-- and you fold over to clench your stomach.
"That is not fair!" Like a child, he whines and slouches his back. "I just professed my love to you and you harass me?!"
"I'd live for you too, Xiaoshi, calm your tits."
It's ridiculous how fast Xiaoshi's mood can change just by hearing you say his name. You want to smack that little mischievous smile off his face and hug him and tell him that you'd live countless lifetimes for him, because you know he would live more for you.
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for the dear anons that sought for x readers for link click <33 i hope this is alright enough for you ;)
m.list
hirokari, 2022
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evcryopeneye ¡ 3 years ago
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@pcachlovc​​ time to dive in
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“Ah Lu Guang,” his name said as a drawl, dragging it out, tone borderline begging as he attempted to get his own way. Cheng Xiaoshi was determined, when he was focused he could achieve anything, pestering, wearing down their resolve. “Lu Guang.” His name spoken again, as if it would somehow make him more attuned to agree to what he wanted.
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“We could order dinner.” Who cared right now if they were strapped for cash, if he had to deal with another pot of instant noodles he was going to crack, “Burgers, how about that?”
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evcryopeneye ¡ 3 years ago
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@pcachlovc​​ asked: ‘ why are you crying yourself to sleep? ’ (puts a lu guang into your askbox because....even more pain...whY NOT)
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It haunted him. Those moments rolled through him every time he closed his eyes. Beige shirt stained red. Lifeless. The way his hand had hung off the sofa, dangling upon the will of gravity. An image seared onto his mind that Xiaoshi thought he would never be able to escape. He’d spent too long thinking about it this morning and hadn’t been able to shake the thought that he might as well have been the one to commit such an atrocity. Xiaoshi couldn’t help but think a century could pass, and he would still be repeating those moments over and over and over again.
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That voice, ever calm, held no malice or accusation and yet, it was too loud. Hands covered his face, like some childish attempt to shield himself off from the world. “I’m sorry.” It’s all he had. What else was he meant to say? Such a simple word, but complex ones would not catch the depth of feeling he had on the situation. “I’m sorry…”
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evcryopeneye ¡ 3 years ago
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@indulgentia​​ asked: 📜⠀»⠀Zack @ Xiaoshi
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evcryopeneye ¡ 3 years ago
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@pcachlovc​​ asked: ♫ (HURT MY FEELINGS)
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Alright - The Subways  Make the great escape. Find a way to make ends meet. Enemies. Well I don’t think they’ll ever sleep. Find our way until we see the light, another day, another chance, and it will be alright. So what you say. What you do is who you are. Say it’s true. Still you loved right from the start. Make a chance and find the reasons why. Another day, another chance, and it will be alright. And I wonder, when we fall down, who do we need? Who we call? It’s alright.
Live Outside (Acoustic) - Enter Shikari I want to live outside, live outside, of all of this. I keep taming, keep training, keep taming the horse but it’s wild, it’s feral and it’s running its course. Patiently madness waits in line in the reception room of my mind. Waiting for the door to be left unattended and waiting for an unwanted guest and it’s so busy I don’t think I’d even notice. I want to live outside, live outside, of all this.
Headspace - Lewis Capaldi  Salt of the earth my friend, it’s all that we are in the end. Well you trapped down all the lines you drew and I can take the hit but I’m sorry I don’t want the bruise. Your voice gets a little loud, when there’s nothing to talk about, you shout dear. I’ll find my lights fading out, more and more by the hour it gets dark in here. If you’ve got time enough for me, sing me a song and send me to sleep. Slip into my headspace while I dream. Spin me a yarn and wrap it up around me.
Little Silver Birds - Hope of the States  It’s pointless, it’s worthless, to deny that you are scared that all the fences, all the walls we build, will never ever fall. I am in love with the chance that we all could do better than we do. The lonely and broken. The people forgotten. Let nobody tell you that your heart is wrong. Send me little silver birds to keep the promise that you made. One hundred thousand tiny lights for all of us who feel the same. All the fences, all the walls we built will one day maybe fall.
Death Dream - Frightened Rabbit  It was dawn. And the kitchen light was still on. I stepped in, found the sucide asleep on the floor. An open mouth, screams and makes no sound, apart from the ring, of the tinnitus of silence you had your ear to the ground. White noise. I don’t know if there’s breathing or not. Butterflied arms tell me that this one has flown. Blood seems black against the skin of your porcelain back. A still life is the last I will see of you, a painting of a panic attack You died in my sleep last night. You died in your sleep last night.
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evcryopeneye ¡ 3 years ago
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@pcachlovc​​ asked: something that makes your muse smile. (for xiaoshi bc he desrves it)
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Seeing people happy.
Happy people make him happy. He knows for some it’s a rarity. He knows some people don’t have it in their lives. He tries to bring a little happy into peoples lives, especially his friends. Xiaoshi wants nothing more than to see them smile, there’s little in the world in terms of possessions that bring him joy. He’s never had much. He’s never been able to afford much. Having money doesn’t bring him particular joy either. They’ve never had much of that either. The only thing that’s worth while, is people being happy, even Qiao Ling he enjoys seeing her happy - even if he wont tell her that.
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necrosin ¡ 3 years ago
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        his eyes stray to the clock as the hour hand finally ticks over to its new place, transient and ever moving, steadily afloat, and the second hand continues moving, untiring. exhaustion is heavy against his eyes, weighted and draining, head throbbing with the tangle of infinitely finite timelines becoming ever more chaotic with each passing moment. and another, and another, and at last ———
        and at last, cheng xiaoshi returns as the second hand hits 34 and continues on, uncaring of what comes to pass, unfeeling to the emotions that settle in this room. lu guang looks to cheng xiaoshi immediately, eyes forever drawn inexorably to him, unavoidably, yet it feels akin to a gravitational pull whenever he returns from the past, right back to where they had stood, or sat, knees bumping as their hands touched. he exhales, quietly, and rests back against the couch cushions / tension draining from his body / as he nods towards the boba on the table.   ❝   good job,   ❞   he means it, too, because cheng xiaoshi always does his work, always does a good job, even when it causes an undue amount of stress to lu guang’s sensibilities.   ❝   welcome back,   ❞   i missed you / i’m relieved / sometimes it’s disorienting, to shift from metaphysical closeness to the physical.
@tomoge, for cheng xiaoshi !! starter call.
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necrosin ¡ 1 year ago
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when cheng xiaoshi looks at him he knows he's being seen —— half—examined / as though he were a book begging to be opened and perused / a skin peeling back sort of sensation. it had been unsettling, once, or close to ( never wholly nor fully, he's BRIGHT and LUMINESCENT and hyper present but cheng xiaoshi has never registered as a threat to lu guang, it never occurred to him that he could run, if he wanted, he had simply appearead / and lu guang had fallen, easy and sudden as breathing ) and now it simply is. which is to say : he's seen when cheng xiaoshi looks at him in the literal and metaphysical sense and he doesn't shy away from that knowledge or knowing, he simply watches him and watches him / always watching him, allowing him close and never quite daring to press closer.
❝ she'll yell at you for spamming her, ❞ a plain statement for a plain observation for a plain boy / though he feels anything but plain with cheng xiaoshi's arm over his shoulders, their bodies pressed together. for a fleeting moment he thinks about pressing his hand to the small of his back, curving his hand against his waist —— not shameful thoughts, but once that set the heart racing.
instead : he leans against cheng xiaoshi's side and looks to the camera / doesn't bother trying to grin or smile, acutely unphotogenic in a universal fit of irony, but he can see his own face in the reflected image, can see how the lines of his face have softened in response, can see how happy he looks ——
because of cheng xiaoshi.
❝ let's include some tourists, ❞ elbow digs gently into his side so they can pivot / he can see bemusement settle in his eyes, a subtle thing, a shift all for cheng xiaoshi. ❝ so she can't accuse me of avoiding people. ❞ she still will, probably, but that's fine : qiao ling is a worrier by nature and he's fine to allow her to fuss as needed.
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Beijing is a crowded place, and Cheng Xiaoshi doesn’t know nearly enough about it to be able to discern if it’s always been like this, but there’s something about the hustle and bustle, the city bursting with life, that puts him at ease. He’s invisible here, he realizes, or--not invisible, not something so cut and dry, but perceived differently. He knows he’s not the kid of once upon a time, knows he’s almost a completely different person, hide toughened, nigh-impenetrable, but it’s still a--relief that he can go someplace new, someplace big and exciting, where no one knows him, and know no one sees his splintered past engraved in the sharp line of his shoulders.
His exuberance must be tangible, or infectious, more like, because there Lu Guang is, hidden under the shade of a tree, meeting Cheng Xiaoshi’s eyes, a smile written into the delicate lines of his face.
He feels the sudden, aching need to thank him again, for coming. Cheng Xiaoshi doesn’t know how readily he might have gone at it alone—too readily, a part of him fears. 
(Qiao Ling worries about him too much, knows his childhood fears too intimately, follows his movements too closely, like he’s fragile, still a kid. She hides it well, but Cheng Xiaoshi’s a good detective when he needs to be, and he knows her better.)
He can’t imagine sharing this with anyone else. 
“Don’t worry,” he says, meandering back over to Lu Guang’s side, phone already in his hand. He grins. “I’m sending her so many selfies she’ll have me blocked by the end of the day.” It’s natural, the feel of Lu Guang’s shoulders as he loops an arm over, lifting his phone in front to frame them. “Look alive, Lu Guang!” Click. He ducks his head, bringing them to eye-level. Click. Leans subtly, cheek pressing to Lu Guang’s. Click, click, in succession. “Y’think that’s enough? Should we take a few with the tourists in the back?” 
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