#& see how tomorrow goes instead. love y'all 💜

[byanyan]

wacky shit seein people u used to write with a lot in one of ur old fandoms in ur recommended blogs list so many years later

[illarian-rambling]

Thanks for the tag @the-golden-comet!

Confession Tag 💜🧡

Rules: For this tag game, share a confession scene—it can be about anything!

Y'all... I finally did it. I finally made my little guys say they love each other!

Her friend shut his eyes, centering himself. “Astra, you mean more to me than I could’ve ever anticipated. Your confidence leaves me in awe, and the way you help even the most complete stranger makes me want to be a better person. The thought of being apart from you… hurts. I think Salis, when you came to rescue me while I was working to rescue you, was when I realized— realized tha-that—” He paused, and Astra held her breath as he ordered his words. “I realized that I’m in love with you.”

Astra froze, body and mind. In love? Like love love? That was an option? Her heart felt as if it might beat right up out of her throat and onto the table. Somewhere deep in her psyche, Astra realized she had decided long ago that romance was not an option for her. Any longing for a connection like that was pointless because she wasn’t the type of woman who got a romantic end. She wasn’t the settling down type. She wasn’t one for diluting herself into something palatable, and that was the only way someone could love her. Wasn’t it?

She thought back to all the thousand times she’d called Mashal “love,” to all the thousand times she’d touched his hand and felt like she was holding a sunbeam instead, for how warmly he seemed to make her glow. She would never have to dilute herself for him, this she knew to be as true as gravity. Had she ever felt that way about a friend before? She’d had so few friends that it was hard to tell.

I wanna spend the rest a’ my life with this man, Astra realized. I wanna wake up next to him every mornin’ and fall asleep next to him every night. I even wanna argue with him and cry on his shoulder, because…. Oh gods, I love him too, don’t I?

Astra stared into Mashal’s eyes, realizing now that he’d gone very quiet in anticipation of her response. Quite involuntarily, a giggle began to burble past Astra’s lips, rounding out into a full, joyful laugh. Mashal’s eyes went wide then, and he quite honestly seemed like he was about to pass out.

“I— I….”

Astra cut him off by cupping his face in her hands, a manic smile still on her face. “I ain’t laughin’ at you, love, I promise. I’m just wonderin’ how I could’ve been such a damn fool for so long. A godsdamned, bat-blind fool. I reckon I love you, too. I reckon I’ve loved you for a long time now and been too caught-up to see it.”

Her smile spread to him, and he began to laugh as well until the two of them were arm in arm, giggling like fools. I’m in love! Astra’s mind sang. That’s what that feeling was! It seemed ridiculous, sitting here like a blushing schoolgirl before the eve of battle, yet here she was. She stared up into Mashal’s eyes and was surprised by just how right it felt. Gently, she reached up to kiss him, only to stop as he pulled away.

“I— I’m sorry,” she began, face immediately flushed. “I was hasty—”

“No, it’s just….” Mashal looked away as he readjusted his bandana in embarrassment. “I think I want to save that for tomorrow. When I can actually feel it, you know?”

“That makes a lot more sense, now that I think about it.” Astra leaned in close instead, savoring the chill of his bronze plating. “A kiss and a pastry, then. In that order?”

“Oh, definitely. I’ll savor both.” Mashal put his arm around her with a contented sigh. “Gods beyond, now I really hope tomorrow goes well.”

“It will. I promised ya way back when that I’d fix this, and now I’m almost there. I ain’t gonna give up on the eve a’ success.”

“You’ve never given up at any other point, so why now?” Mashal said, smiling.

Asta closed her eyes, letting satisfaction wash over her. She’d always thought of love as an explosive thing, like gunpowder or an incendiary rune. Maybe that was why she hadn’t recognized the feeling within her now. It was as cozy as her old ribbon coat had been, and felt as natural as breathing. So easy to slip into and never come up for air.

First love on a battlefield…. As confidently as she had talked before, Astra felt the cold creep of fear enter her sunny heart. This didn’t change anything, not really. She still couldn’t lose, no matter what. Yet even so, somehow everything felt like it had been kicked up a gear.

This is a beautiful thing, Astra thought, feeling her lips curve into an involuntary smile as she leaned against Mashal’s chest, his fingers brushing through her hair. I can’t lose it to her, which makes this easy then. I will win. Once and for all, I will fix this.

I'll tag @kaylinalexanderbooks @paeliae-occasionally @leave-her-a-tome @mk-writes-stuff @aziz-reads and anyone else who wants in :)