sweeney-the-stupid-friend

[sweeney-the-stupid-friend]

Centuries Later: a Lokius finale one-shot

"Loki, what the shit are you doing?"

"I'm," he starts and stops. Sighs. 

Over the last few hundred years he's learnt a lot. Besides what he’d set out to learn he’s inadvertently memorized his friends' responses to anything he says. 

Even if he says the same thing ten times in a row, any vocal or facial tic changed has a butterfly effect, and he's come to know literally all of them. 

It’s made reality go a bit wonky, made it a bit like a jetksi simulator game, at least from what he’s heard. His friends aren’t looking at him, they’re looking through him, and he’s begun to dissapear for it. 

In his efforts to save the universe he's become painfully aware of his insignificance in it and the simple role he plays. Because his life has become just that. A role. He'll hit the lines that gets them the quickest results and he’ll hit them again and again. 

He’ll improvise from time to time, make jokes with his friends, and enjoy his conversation like he’s still there. But there came a point where he couldnt think of any new jokes to tell, and that might’ve been decades ago. He doesn't remember when time got away from him. 

He still tries to break out of his dissociative state though. God, he still tries. Because sometimes Loki breaks. Like now.

“I've been doing this for a very, very long time. Reliving this moment, learning everything I can, everything I have to. I haven't been outside the TVA and if I'm honest sometimes I think I miss the sun?" His voice cracks. He's in it now, and his skin feels tight with the embarrassing open show of emotion. He positions his hands on the console to square his shoulders and get himself together when-

"Aw man, come here." He's encircled by… warm arms. Tweed clad. Mobius' shampoo is… coconut? He's hugging him. This hasn't happened in any reset. "You're just tired, Loki. Everyone needs a break from time to time, even gods, alright?"

Ridiculous, cartoonish man. His best friend. The love of his life, not a simulation. Loki hugs him back desperately, and finds peace. Over the next century or two he wastes a lot of time with Mobius. He never remembers, but always looks like he does. Every minute is worth it.

[sweeney-the-stupid-friend]

STORY OF A VARIANT - COMIC FAN ART / LOKI | SECOND PART | (2022)

Art by: “Keiidakamya” 

[sweeney-the-stupid-friend]

[sweeney-the-stupid-friend]

[sweeney-the-stupid-friend]

Burton gang in the discord vc edition

[sweeney-the-stupid-friend]

To Dr. Spencer Reid, who may be adding M.D. to an already impressive list of credentials.

[sweeney-the-stupid-friend]

stoic boss man versus neurodivergent wunderkind

[sweeney-the-stupid-friend]

The blaster isn't entirely sure either...

[sweeney-the-stupid-friend]

HAPPY LET PAPYRUS SAY FUCK DAY 🎉

[audio source]

[sweeney-the-stupid-friend]

The Spy Position was Compromised.

Please listen to Adagio For TRON-Cover by Marc-Andre Gautier, as it is what inspired me to draw this.

I have many mixed feelings about this piece. I am also my own worst critic.

[sweeney-the-stupid-friend]

dumbledore, to student snape: how did you get in here?

snape: the door was open.

dumbledore: no, it certainly wasn't.

snape: it was after i opened it.

[sweeney-the-stupid-friend]

‘Friendly Competition’ does not equal ‘Warfare’, Severus.

Not shown: Minerva, face first in the snow after being taken out by the Sniper Rifle equivalent of a snowball.

Challenge the Spy they said, it’ll be fun, they said

[sweeney-the-stupid-friend]

1 September 1971

"Any girls that you find cute, Sev?" Lucuis says hanging out in the common room with Severus it was his first year and day at Hogwarts. The boy seemed to have no friends. But Lucuis saw the boy and took him under his wing. "There is this girl Lily Evans." Severus said "Lily Evans? What's her blood status?" Lucuis asked, now interested about the girl. "She's a muggle-born witch." Severus says in a low voice. "Ha, a muggle-born! Sev, how about a halfblood witch or maybe even a pureblood! Not some filthy mudblood!" Lucuis laughed. Severus shook his head, knowing Lily was greater than Lucuis understood her to be.

_____ September ,1973

"How's Evans?" Lucuis asked now in his 7th year "Fine." Severus replied now in his 3rd year. "Heard Potter hopelessly in love with her." Lucius said. Severus's grip on his quill tighten at the mention of James. He loved Lily, but James did love her aswell, it was and will always be a competition between them for Lily.

___ ________,19__

“LEAVE HIM ALONE!” Lily shouted…

“Ah, Evans, don't make me hex you,” said James…

“Take the curse off him, then!”

James… …turned to Snape and muttered the counter-curse.

“There you go,” he said… “You're lucky Evans was here, Snivellus - “

“I don't need help from filthy little Mudbloods like her!”

Severus later came to learn that he would regret those words, especially since came out of his mouth, and were directed towards Lily, the girl he loved.

31st October, 1981

Severus knocked on the door to Malfoy Manor, quickly. Lucuis opened the door "Severus what's-"

"He killed Lily! She's gone Lucius!" Severus cried. Lucuis lead Severus to the coach "Ssh, it's okay Sev."

"It's not! Lily was the woman I loved! It's my fault!" Lucuis held Severus close to him "It's not you fault, Sev. "

Lucuis held his friend close as he cried. He looked over to see Narcissa holding baby Draco in her arms, she looked like she was about to cry as well. She knew how much Severus cared for Lily, and hated to see him upset, over the person he truly loved. "I-I just want to see her again."

31 August, 1982

Severus, Narcissa and Lucuis followed Draco who was now 2, walking around looking at the birds and flowers. While the adults weren't looking Draco grabbed some flowers,Severus always seemed to favor those flowers. Draco waddled over to Severus, after grabbing Severus leg he looked down at Draco. " 'ere for you!" Draco said Severus smiled once he saw what the flowers were, lilies. "Thank you Draco." Severus said hugging the boy

2 May, 1998

Severus opened his eyes, he knew he was dead. He looked around before he felt some run up behind he and hug him tightly like they haven't seen him in a decade. He turned around.

"Lily?"

"Hello Sev, thank you, even though you didn't show it. Thank you for protecting Harry." Lily spoke "Your welcome." Severus looked behind Lily. James, Remus, and Sirius stood there. Severus nor James would ever tell but James mouthed a thank you to Severus.

2 June, 1998

Lucuis dressed in all black walked up to the grave of his friend. He sat down in the grass facing the grave. "H-Hey Sev, sorry it took so long to get here been in hiding for the last month. How is it in heaven? Peaceful, I bet." Lucuis spoke trying his hardest not to cry. "Draco came to plant flowers the other day. Lilies, your favorite."

"Say hi, to Lily for me. Rest easy, Sev." Lucuis was definitely crying now. He felt Narcissa's hand on his shoulder before she kneeled down and hugged him. "I miss him, Cissy." Lucuis spoke softly "He got his wish to see Lily again, he's happy now." Lucuis said. Narcissa heart broke knowing that her husband treated Severus like his own brother, sometimes like a son.

(No date)

Lucuis died, his time was over. After he woke in the after life he wander. He felt a pair of arms around him "Did you miss me, Lucuis?" A monotone voice said "Yes, a lot." Lucuis said turning around to face Severus "I saw you cry at my grave. Not going to lie, I laughed afterwards." Severus said. Lucuis acted offended "Ofcourse you did." Lucuis said. "I think Narcissa was over there with Lily." Severus said as they walked around. It took awhile after the war but the two friends were together again, no more death, or dark lord to worry about. Finally, at peace.

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It hate writing the dates the way British people write it. I cried while writing Lucius at Severus's grave. I'm 100% doing at Maraduer one.

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[sweeney-the-stupid-friend]

Snape hc where...

Everyone in the Slytherin house love Snape. Even if he was firm, he was fair and always know the right thing to say to make them feel better about themselves.

He was their jagged rock that knew how to pierce but also know how to raise them up.

And when Snape died, every year, on his grave alone, there was a sea of flowers laid just to remember the man that the Snakes love

[sweeney-the-stupid-friend]

AN: I turned 30 today — I kind of imagine that my own grouchiness and discomfort with birthdays might be how a certain gentleman might feel about his, at least outwardly.

***

Here's some birthday headcanons for our boy:

- Eileen and Tobias tried their best to make his birthdays special when he was young (<7-ish). Eileen would bake a cake and Toby would set aside a couple quid to take Severus to the toy story where he could buy whatever he wanted with it. It became a yearly tradition until Severus manifested magic. He doesn't like thinking back on those simpler times; it's too painful.

- After Severus' magic manifested and Eileen's secret was revealed, Toby's worldview was irreparably altered. All the years he'd been struggling to provide for them and his wife had the power to make things come into being? It crushed him. He'd always been fond of drink, but he turned to it to get through the days, rarely ever sober. He couldn't hold down a job for more than a few weeks or months at most. He didn't care to. What has the point?

In response, Eileen turned in on herself. She'd always struggled with her mind 'playing tricks' on her, turning to consuming sadness more easily than anyone else she'd met. She stopped taking care of herself, the house, of Severus.

After, Severus' birthdays went largely unremarked upon. What was a birthday when there wasn't always food on the table or someone to put it there? The days roll together for those caught up in themselves and there's no space for a child other than what they can carve out for themself in that place. Severus began taking walks around the nice part of Cokeworth outside the shops, and he picked up any coins he could find, saving them up for special occasions.

After thinking long and hard about what he wanted to spend them on, Severus decided he'd make a birthday for himself by gettkng a milkshake from the diner he often walked past to pick up change. When he turned nine, he'd sat at the counter by himself and swiveled in the shiny barstool as he sipped his treat. The staff shot concerned looks at one another without him noticing. A little boy with hand-me-down clothes meant for someone else and unkempt hair and hygiene. Still, he'd come in the afternoon when there were few people to be put off by him, so they'd let him enjoy his milkshake. That birthday made Severus feel a vicious pride in himself, like he could make a space for himself in the world.

- Birthdays at Hogwarts were still unremarked upon by his family, but for five years, Lily would make a point to get him a treat from the kitchens or sit with him at the Slytherin table with him, despite the behavior of his house. His sixth and seventh years, he stole food from the kitchens himself and avoided the Great Hall altogether.

- Once he was a professor, he made it a little game to never tell anyone his birthday, which was a twisted type of fun until his birthday would come and go without a soul to wish him a happy birthday but himself. Eventually people stopped asking when his birthday was and he stopped even wishing happy birthday to himself.

- Once the war ended and he somehow survived, he considered letting the day pass without any fanfare like he'd done for two decades. Instead, he wrote a note to Minerva Christmas Day, which said, "My birthday is January 9th." No signature, but when a note popped out of the Floo, replying with, "About time, Severus. Don't expect to get out of a yearly gathering at Hogwarts from this point forward. Be there at 7 in the staff room," Severus smiled.

[sweeney-the-stupid-friend]

I have a weird head cannon! And I can't keep it in so I am blabbing it out here...

Severus Snape has a group of his former students placed all over the corners of the wizarding world acting as a net of intelligence gathering sources since after the first war (like espionage agencies have deep civilian assets). No one knows of their existence except Snape (not even Dumbledore), neither do they know each other.

I somehow divided the houses like... three Slytherins, Two Ravenclaws, and one Hufflepuff and one Gryffindor as well. They have been specially trained by Snape himself, individually and belong to different years so that no one can find a pattern. They are masters of their chosen craft highly trained combatants of defence, offense and potions (obviously... XD)

They are well established in their own choice of occupations and have their own personal lives. They exchange correspondence with Snape through encrypted letters and if they have to physically meet him, they do so in the muggle world.

Snape had initially expected them to remain aloof and distanced and had vowed to only use them if he sees or hears news of Voldemort's rise but they prove to have grown an odd sort of attachment with him. They keep sending him letters filled with their trials and tribulations, achievements and failures, asking advice for their personal problems as well. They even keep sending him souvenirs and gifts, trinkets and potion ingredients like presents.

Snape sometimes feels like he has suddenly adopted a bunch of kids.

They get active from Harry's fourth year when it becomes clear that Voldemort has indeed risen from the dead. They help Snape resume his spy activities, working with him in the background giving him info of the regrouping DEs, collecting support from wizards and witches from world over should there be an all out war.

They reveal themselves in the final battle of Hogwarts, bringing with them a significant horde of support in the form of magical creatures like dragons and other wizards and witches like Dark Hunters and etc.. turning the tide of the war drastically.

The Death Eaters are rounded up faster and most of the casualties are avoided (including Remus, Fred and Snape of course) leaving people grievously injured than dead and help Harry and Severus defeat Voldemort.

(They hadn't informed Snape that they had also been individually working up from within the British Ministry of Magic to keep Snape from getting incriminated on the occasion of him being compromised. )

Finally they are found herding their former Potion's Professor beaming from ear to ear, grit, dirt and blood streaking their not so young faces yet the euphoria of a long and hard won victory fresh in their hearts.

Snape just gives a small smile and says 'Well done."

[sweeney-the-stupid-friend]

Autistic Five truthing (x): Stimming Edition

(Headcanon) Five stims by putting his hands in his pockets and fiddling with objects.