sweaterangst

[sweaterangst]

Just 2 BFFs

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What the sneef? I'm snorfin' here!

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hey wait! i know you! we used to be chained next to each other in the cave! wow, so good to see you, how are ya? man. remember how we used to talk about the shadows on the wall together. gosh that was a long time ago. but hey. sure is one heck of a sun out here, right? it's good to see you.

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went to my best friend’s house last night and saw a little plushie dog and plushie cat that had been sewn together down the middle into a two-headed chimera. I said, “did you do that?” she said, “yes, I saved them.”

turns out at her old job when the last two plushies hadn’t sold and became deadstock, her boss told her to cut them up and throw them out. so she cut them each in half, preserved their heads, and then rebuilt them together.

cannot stop thinking about the way these little plushies were approached with the instinct of a Vampire or some sort of ancient god. “Let me save you [turn you into a monster].”

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kitten I’ll be honest the finality of everything in this world haunts daddy like a second shadow

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desperately need to read or watch something that will alter my brain chemistry and turn me into a new person

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cats being capable of understanding accidents and even giving you a little head bonk to let you know you're still cool makes it infinitely funnier that they don't understand when you're trying to help them

cats when you step on their tail: i'll admit that was rather ouchie, but given the lifetime of goodwill and trust between us, one must conclude this booboo is but a fluke.

cats when you try to get their claws unstuck from the couch covering: this nefarious bitch has never had a single honorable intention in their dishonest and shameful life, this must be one of their sinister plots or perhaps even an attempt on my life,

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the guy from fortnite,...

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Guy at a gay bar with a 25 page manual in hand looking at the hankerchiefs in peoples pockets and then licking his finger and flipping pages trying to look up what it means also he has a scorpion for a hand that keeps poisoning peaople

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When I go to someone’s blog I have never met in my life and in their bio it’s like ‘Taken’ I’m like fuckkkkkkk……………. wtf what if I wanted u……….

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it's important to have one scary hour every day. for those who don't know, a scary hour is when someone or something breaks into your house to try and kill you, but you can't leave because your stove is producing a beneficial miasma

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this oedipal ain't shit

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hold on sorry you're telling me the name of the boat was "the terror"?? i always assumed that was a retroactive name! did they WANT things to go horrifically awry???

obsessed with the implication that nominative determinism could have saved them

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ouugughhhh. merlin scene redraw. did this all in one sitting i think i just blacked out......... and here is the screen cap below the thingy