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svtspeach · 10 months ago

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Grief as we know it

Pairing: Seungcheol x Reader

Genre: Pure Angst

Warning: Grief, Death, Angst, Injuries (but not in depth and accurate, lol. my medical knowledge is from Grey's Anatomy), Not proofread (lol I don’t know how to this yet, by this i mean putting all the warnings haha)

Word count: 674 words

Author’s note: Hi, Everyone! So I am new here and I don’t really know how to navigate this site as an author but I guess I’m trying my best? This is just a blurb that I wrote at 1 am in the morning and yeaaa, let me know if you like it and if you would want to see a longer version of it! See ya!

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The Loss

Choi Seungcheol was a quick-witted man, everybody knew that. He was able to respond quickly and effectively in situations of high pressure. Another thing about Seungcheol was that he was selfless, he would always sacrifice himself for the other people’s happiness and comfort. Seungcheol was also the epitome of bravery, a trait that everyone has always praised him for. He has never been afraid to take risks and stand up for what he believes in. It was his strongest trait, and one that you loved most about him. That is, until that trait was the thing that led him to the biggest sacrifice of his life and straight to the arms of death.

“Can you repeat that for me again, please?” you said for the second time. It’s not that you didn’t hear the doctor’s voice, in fact you heard him loud and clear. But you just couldn’t seem to process the words coming out of doctor standing in front of you.

“Miss, your partner was taken to the emergency room after a vehicle crash. From what we heard from the paramedics, he jumped in front of a loose truck in order to save a little girl and her grandma. He came in with several fractures, a puncture in his abdomen, and a severe head trauma. We took him in for an emergency surgery to repair the damages and we tried the best we could, but the damage was so severe, and he couldn’t…” the doctor explained once more but for some reason, you couldn’t seem to let yourself hear the end of his sentence.

It didn’t matter how he was going to say it anyways. Seungcheol is dead and you just lost the love of your life.

The Grief

Seungcheol has always been a constant in your life. You weren’t friends since childhood or anything of sorts, but you have been dating him for four years and living with him for two. It didn’t seem like a long time, but being with him most of the time for the past two years have made you feel so accustomed to his presence. You were deeply in love with him, in the best way possible.

Loving him and being loved by him was the best thing you have ever experienced your whole life. It was fulfilling, warm, and nurturing. You like the person you have become when you are with him, and you loved how you were able to push for each other’s growth. Being in love with him was not suffocating, in fact it felt liberating, you felt like you were supported and cheered upon every step you take. You really felt like you have found the love of your life, and that you were going to spend the rest of your life with each other.

You knew that you don’t want to live in a world without Seungcheol. Not because you can’t live without him, you know that you would be able to continue and move on with your life, but you knew that you were going to be miserable. And you were, indeed, very miserable right now.

They say that the feeling of missing someone comes in waves. Initially, the grief hits you hard. It was intense and strong like a storm. The ocean of longing is calmer now, but the wave of yearning still washes over you now and then and it still sucks. It hits you in unexpected moments like now. You were watching a movie with your best friend, and you’ve reached the part where the main characters finally kissed each other passionately. Your mind started to drift away, and you tried to remember the last kiss you shared with Seungcheol, but you can’t. That’s because you thought that you had forever with Seungcheol, but you don’t. You never thought that the last time would be the last time because you thought that you would have more. It might not be as painful anymore, but you can feel the pieces of your heart slowly falling apart again.

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