summertime-butterfliez

[summertime-butterfliez]

i am currently in a 2-3 year long term relationship with someone i love

believe me when i say things will eventually get better

always have the courage to keep trying, to go for what resonates your most genuine self

to believe that what's meant for you, will eventually find its way to you

[summertime-butterfliez]

i am so done hahahhahahahahaha :(

[summertime-butterfliez]

if u put things into perspective, there hasnt been a lot going on

four guys already passed

and i am still, alone

[summertime-butterfliez]

if u put things into perspective, there hasnt been a lot going on

two guys already passed

and i am still, alone 

[summertime-butterfliez]

i am always enough

im not defined by the love i give

[summertime-butterfliez]

aaaaand that's one guy off the list

huhu next

[summertime-butterfliez]

i love you, jan ian alastaire gustilo

you brought me love, peace, and calm. 

you also brought me hope, sunshine, and comfort. 

i am going to do my best, just to keep you

please stay in my life

[summertime-butterfliez]

Questions I wished I asked you

1. What do you hate about people 2. Who are you waiting for 3. Are libraries, malls, bookstores dying 4. What is your favourite memory 5. What memory are you afraid to lose 6. Do you feel lonely in the city 7. Where is society going 8. What disappoints you most about the world 9. What do you think about when you look at the sky 10. Sunsets or sunrises 11. Do you think the arts can save people 12. How does the arts hurt people 13. What do you fear losing 14. Do you believe in fate, or is everything just a coincidence 15. Do you panic easily 16. Do you save the best for last 17. What does it mean for something to be worth it 18. Who from your past would you want to meet again 19. Which parent are you closer to 20. If you could change anything about how you were raised what would it be 21. If you’re in a bad mood do you prefer to be alone or with someone 22. Do you believe in second chances 23. How does moving affect you 24. Language or music 25. Most exciting thing that happened to you this year 26. If you could change one thing about the world what would it be 27. Describe one of your darkest, taboo thoughts 28. Is home a place or a feeling 29. Have you ever had dreams about a past life, what would your past life be like 30. Hello or goodbye 31. Would you rather love or be loved 32. How do you define beauty 33. Compared to happiness, how important is truth and reality 34. Do you find it easy to manipulate people 35. Where does happiness come from 36. Do you believe yourself to be truly free 37. Sea or land 38. Are you easily persuaded 39. When is lying important 40. Does a person’s name influence who they become 41. How much does language affect our thinking 42. Are you sacrilegious  43. Do you find it hard to let go 44. Why do we romanticize pain 45. Are you more responsive to eye contact or touch 46. Does distance make the heart grow fonder 47. Do you ever think about the memories you can’t remember 48. What was a friendship you wish you could’ve still kept

[summertime-butterfliez]

do you ever have those random moments when you just realize how much you love something? whether it’s listening to your fav song or going back to a hobby you loved as a kid or when you get coffee and for some reason it’s just perfect that day and you’re reminded why you order that exact coffee everyday

[summertime-butterfliez]

i’m tired of having to feel nothing at all, then everything at once. 

[summertime-butterfliez]

you were so beautiful when i was taking a picture of you, while the sun was setting down, and the greens were all hugging your steps you with that bottle you're holding i was taking a picture of you and i noticed how you were so beautiful that i thought the people you're going to love, and the people who surrounds you all the time are so lucky to be with you i never get to see this beauty everyday. and they do. you are the most beautiful thing i've ever laid my eyes on.

[summertime-butterfliez]

the most genuine thing i’ve ever felt

it all happened when i was with you

i miss you, love

so much

[summertime-butterfliez]

we fight. we make up. 

we always make up. what matters is that we always make up. you allow me in your life. i allow you in my life again.

isn’t that love

discreetly

[summertime-butterfliez]

i miss you

[summertime-butterfliez]

06/30/18 (via precioousxo)

[summertime-butterfliez]

again

at this time

you are again thinking of him

and i know

it sucks

it fucking sucks

it never actually goes away?

he's not even your first love anymore. he had become my second. my third.

lord. i am tired. i tried.

it was like a pause that was hit play again. then now it's paused again.

now, i am taking that fucking recorder and smashing it to pieces. there is no pause or play or stop. just. gone.

love for that person alone is not enough. timing the universe allows is important too.

and as of now, i won't allow myself to love someone that far away anymore.

if the universe wants him to come back, i wouldn't do the thing anymore.

i love franco. i already do. so much, that it hurts to be far away from him. that it hurts for me that he told me things are still one-sided. it hurts that i try very very very very hard to pretend that i'm still okay. it's hard.

enough. i have enough of this. i don't even care anymore.

lord, you shouldn't've been that cruel to me. one hurting from him was enough. that one confrontation was already enough.

now, we're back. fuck you.

[summertime-butterfliez]

six semesters down

two more huhu malapit na