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[styxflower]

Have I mentioned how gut wrenching the slow progression from "Jonathan Sims-- Head Archivist of the Magnus Institute, London" to "Jonathan Sims-- The Archivist" is?

These are Jon's introductions of himself. He had already had people simply calling him "The Archivist" way back in season one, but he never introduced himself that way. He declared his title of Archivist as what he saw it to be-- a job title and nothing more.

And then we reached season three and there was a gap where we had "Jonathan Sims, former Archivist" and the words were still spoken as one would a job title but with a certain sense of grief that was incongruous with the professional veneer.

And finally, the reveal of what the Archives were and what being The Archivist truly meant happened, and Jon stopped pretending-- even to himself-- that it was just a job. No, he was Jonathan Sims-- The Archivist-- and it was spoken with the gravitas and responsibility of a king's title. It was now part of who he was.

And then, season five, and it's no longer "Jonathan Sims--". It is merely "The Archivist". Because Jon believes his humanity to have died along with the world he was tricked into dooming. His person-hood is secondary-- and can perhaps be considered more of a job title now in a similar way to how Jon referred to being The Archivist in season one. In season five, Jon believes his entire being to have been consumed by the Watcher. The Archives and his job as the Archivist can no longer be seen as a job, or even as a part of who he is, because it is ALL he is. There is no part remaining of Jonathan Sims, because he is The Archivist first and foremost. He doesn't believe his own humanity great enough to be mentioned.

He is, of course, wrong. But it wouldn't be a tragedy if he didn't realize that until it was too late.

[styxflower]

oh shit, ink5oul doesn't know what's happening to them

they're becoming an avatar (or the closest thing the protocol universe has to them) and they don't know why

that must be fucking terrifying jfc

[styxflower]

i can’t decide if it’s funnier that when Elias confronts Jon for literally stalking his employees, a very reasonable thing for elias to do, jon immediately decides that elias murdered gertrude, or that jon was RIGHT

[styxflower]

Can’t wait for episode 21 of Mag Protocol to find out if Gwen pulled a “she’s a runner, she’s a track star” or if she’s gonna show up with a bedazzled “rich lost child, please return home” tattoo

(If she gets an eye tattoo and it has powers, I’ll lose my mind.)

[styxflower]

The thing about Jonathan Sims is that he isn’t at all stupid, in fact he’s quite the opposite.

Take the Coffin for example, the idea of using an anchor is a logical and honestly quite clever one, however, where this idea falls apart is that while Jon may be intelligent, that does not mean he has common sense, or any sense of self preservation for that matter, and so he goes straight to cutting off his finger, and then continuously trying to cut it off despite the fact his body’s healing factor is clearly winning here.

And then, to top that off, he immediately decides the next reasonable choice of an anchor is his own rib, and actively gets not one, but two of his ribs removed by the walking embodiment of body horror.

Jonathan Sims is not stupid, but he is stupidly impulsive and should not be trusted with any actual plan ever, because while his initial idea may be the most ingenious thing you’ve ever bloody heard, I promise you he is going to ruin it with the most unhinged, god-awful follow up known to man.

[styxflower]

alice thinks she's in a horror but she's trying to make it a horror-comedy, sam thinks he's the main character in a psychological, mike flanagan-esque horror, colin thinks he's in an apocalypse film, celia thinks she's in a sci-fi with tinges of thriller and gwen? she thinks she's in a 20 something find yourself film, where she's played by julia roberts

[styxflower]

Day 50/110 until end of exams

29/03/2024 So my last mock exam was yesterday, so I have about three weeks of consultations until the real exams begin. The last mock exam was biology for me, which I am happy about because it gave me time to study more for it, since I really want to do well in bio. I think I did pretty well, although there was some stuff I did not remember. This years exams begin earlier than usual, so on 24 April for me instead of 1 of May. I am a bit mad about it, but the first state exam, which all the other high school graduates take, is at about the same time, so it is not that big of a problem. I can't really believe the end of high school is basically in 60 days, since there won't be any more exams or school after that. Then there is only the graduation and applying to the university left. It feels and very much is the end of a big chapter of my life and the beginning of another. But for now I will enjoy as much as I can the time I do have left of hich school.

[styxflower]

Day 54/110 until end of exams

So finally this week is over, meaning most of my mock exams are over, now all I have left is french listening and bio. I feel like I did pretty okay on my mocks. I had also CAE (C1 Advanced Exam) today and yesterday, which did add a bit, but not actually that much to my stress. I know I will probably get C1, the question is if I was able to get C2, not that it really matters, but for myself I hope for C2.

The real exams are about a month away right now, so I wish myself and all the other May 2024 graduates good luck on revising for the exams.

[styxflower]

23/03/2024

Feeling burned out for two days. I've been trying to study for my French Individual Oral for the past 5 days. But the thing is, I suck at French oral tests. Hell, I can't even speak properly in general. Why do I even bother to try if I know I'm going to fail it anyway? The only reason I'm even trying is that so I can say that I tried. Really it just feels like I could study other things that I'm actually good at.

🎧: Icarus - Bastille

[styxflower]

Day 50/110 until exams are over

So weekly updates it is it seems like. This and next week are my mock exams. Yay!(very ironic)

Seriously though, half the subjects are done for me so far, Language A, Physics and History, and I am not feeling as bad as I thought. I think I did actually pretty well in physics P2 and three and history P1. Other papers I am not sure how I feel. This week I have only math and french reading and writing part. Next week I thankfully have only french listening and bio, so I can revise more. This week is though one thing after another and at the end of the day I have been pretty mentally exhausted, so I try not to overexert myself.

[styxflower]

Day 41(?)/110 until end of exams

So I am really inconsistent in posting and for that I am sorry. But, as exams draw closer I hope to post more.

Since the mock exams begin already next week, I have finished with most of the topics in most subjects, the only exception is maths, where we have not taken probability distributions yet, but we will do that after the mocks. I managed to learn the whole biology ecology option in one week, so now I have a lot of biology to revise.

Honestly I am most scared of maths and history, because I have not revised as much as I should or I just don't know the topic well enough.

Today so far I have done some maths revision and have re-read a book for literature that I plan to use in paper two.

Other plans for today are to do more practice questions in maths, revise biology and french and hopefully read some more.

[styxflower]

Day 10/110, 07.02.2024

Today I,

Had a math test on probability and got a 6

Had physics test on astrophysics and probably got a 6 or 7

Worked on translating a text for a competition

Read a drama just for fun

[styxflower]

9/110 Days, 06.02.2024

I have not posted for some days, but I promise I have studied. Today I had my Language A Literature Internal Oral. I was nervous about it, but I think it went pretty well. I have three test this week and I have to finish my IAs and TOK essay, but at the end of next week all this will be done.

[styxflower]

Day 3/110, 31.01.2024

Today I was kinda productive, but I still do have stuff do to. I am kinda a lot stressed because I have multiple deadlines coming up in next two weeks plus three tests next week. I do try to ignore the stress for the most part take time for myself and hopefully I will not totally fuck up my sleep schedule (not that it is the best right now).

Today I:

Finally finished literature HL essay

Revised for biology human physiology test tomorrow

Solved some astrophysics problems in physics, bc next week is the test

Started editing my bio IA based on feedback

I also took a play collection book from the library to read for fun. I really have to work on my physics IA today, but will I have time and energy.

Hopefully by the end of the week I will be less stressed.

[styxflower]

Day 2/110

Today I worked on my literature HL essay a bit more. We are taking probability in math right now, and the harder questions are really hard for me for some reason. I spent way too much time solving two problems today.

[styxflower]

Days of studying 1/110

Since this is my final year in high school I have exams coming up in the spring. To be exact my first exams is on 24. April and they last for three and a half weeks.

There are currently 110 days until my last exam, so I decided to try to study at least a bit every day. The goal is to keep up motivation to study and prepare for the exams and to share my journey with everyone interested.

So, today I made some alterations to my literature HL essay, made some biology notes and I worked on my physics IA. I should finish my physics IA in a few days since I have to send the first draft soon. Most of my IA or essay final draft deadlines are in February, so the next month will be busy.

[styxflower]

06.12.2023

I have come to the conclusion that it is very difficult to post consistently for me, just because I am constantly so busy I simply do not remember to. That said, here is a brief conclusion thus far.

I finished my EE, not the best work I have done but something

I finished my Math IA and I am actually pretty contempt with it

I did my CAS project, but I am not sure it counts because it kinda failed on participation part

Now all the other things will begin, that means I have to begin my G4 IAs, so bio and physics, I have to begin my literature HL essay and my TOK essay. I have a bit time before the literature IA, as I will do it in January or February. Hopefully I do have enough time to do finish everything before the deadlines.

Right now, I have two tests coming up in the next two days and have to study for them.