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my so called bestfriend
“Luna, am I going to die?”  That was the last thing I said to Luna. I'm getting a little ahead of myself.  Let me start at the beginning shall we.  Hi my name is Sage,  and I am from a world that might  not seem so ordinary.  Is what i want to tell you but that's not the truth. I actually live in a small town on the poor side of town. From a poor family that  has a drunk mother and a drug addict  as a father. I have a sister jane. She spends her  days going to parties and sleeping with random guys.  But that has always  been my life i guess day in and day out,  if I died my death would mean nothing to them. 
              But  let's get on to the story and stop with the background.  “Sage” yelled my mother angrily while stomping towards my room. “Yes” i Squealed  out before she got to the door frame. She walked into my room before I knew she had figured out where I was hiding and proceeded to go straight to my closet. She snatched the door open just as I was exhaling the cigarette smoke. She smacked me across the face and she made me choke on the cigarette smoke that I was exhaling.  She then stole the cigarette out of my hand and took a long drag of the cigarette before she leaned down enough for me to smell  her rancid whiskey smelling breath.  ” If I catch you smoking another cigarette I will do more than just smack you. Do you understand” I shake my head wildly yes.  “ speak  when spoken too“  she shouted ``yes” i stuttered out before she shoved me back in the closet where i was hidden , then she went to leave. Before she left the room she turned around and said “ I wish you would just die, maybe then I will be able to live happily”.  She left but not before she slammed the door shut.
          All i could do was cry, even though I had 15 years of her abuse,
all i ever do is cry. I wiped away the tears as a came, i began to get up and get ready for the next to come after my dad gets back from the bar, that was my plan at least but instead i ran to my window and climbed out where i fell on to an old worn down mattress that i put under my window to soften the fall, when i landed i took off running to my best friend Luna’s house. Which is just two blocks south from my house. I sprinted all the way there, when I reached the door I didn't even knock. I just ran up the stairs to her room where I found her smoking a cigarette by the window. She quickly tries to hide the cigarette before  she realizes it's only me. She can tell i have been crying so she reaches under her bed and pulls out a box where she keeps her pack of cigarettes and pulls out a cigarette, she proceeds to light the cigarette then asks
” Do you want it ?”  I took the cigarette from her hand and took a  few drags. 
        After a few calming seconds of silence Luna asked “what happened”, while she got up to go get a bag of frozen vegetables.  I follow her to the kitchen where I sit on the counter while she hands the bag of peas. I looked at her for a second before i answer” it was my mom she hit for smoking cigarettes. I bet Jane told her it was because I wouldn't  let her just take my pack from me so she can smoke some.” Luna shakes her head “ your sister is a bitch. You do know that right?” I look at her and sigh “ yeah, i know but what can i do about it, it's not like i can just wish her away.” Luna chuckled “ that would make life easier if you could though, but enough with the wishful thinking.
        Do you want to go get a pizza with me? My mom and dad are out of town this week so you can stay with me this week if you want .” she offered. I definitely didn't want to go back home so I agreed. “ Can we get a meat lover's pizza?”  I asked. Luna laughed , “ Of course, what other kind of pizza will we get.”  I smiled back at her where we walked in complete comfortable silence, until we got to the pizza shop.
          “ Hey Sage, Luna what can i get y'all this time.'' Johnny the cashier asked. “ Oh just the regular, a large meat lover's pizza with extra cheese and ranch on the side” says Luna in a playful voice “ yes ma’am ”  Johnny says with a playful bow before he runs off to make the pizza. 
            Luna and I went to sit in our normal booth while we waited for a pizza, when luna whispers to me “ do you think johnny is into cause i wouldn’t mind if johnny bends me over the tab-” “ orders ready Sage and Luna ” shouts johnny from the counter. “ ok hold a second “ I yelled. “ I don't know, maybe you should shoot your shot,” I told her. Luna then got up and walked towards the counter and when Johnny gave her the pizza.
       Johnny said “ hey i'm having  a party tomorrow do you guys want to come?” Luna looked over like she wanted to know if it was ok. I shook my head yes. “Sure “ said Luna looking back at Johnny. “ great its at my house” johnny said while writing down his address and phone number.`` If y’all need a ride i can come pick you guys up if you like. Just call tomorrow if you need a ride.”     Johnny told us while handing Luna the paper, while leaning real close to her ear whispering something that only she could. Luna let out a giggle, then waved goodbye. Johnny said “ see you tomorrow night then.”  “see you then” said Luna 
         When we made it out the door I asked “ what did he say?” luna looked at me with the biggest blush on her face then said  '' he said  i can’t wait to see you there wear something sexy.”  I smirked back, “ well I guess we know the answer, he is definitely into you.”  I said while watching Luna skip. I couldn’t lie, Luna was a very beautiful girl. She had raven black hair that ran all the way down her back loosely braided, she was a pale-ish color with freckles on her face. Luna has the most  angelic color of blue eyes , Johnny would be a fool to not have Luna. 
      When we got to the street that Luna's house is on I could hear my parents faintly yelling. I started to panic so I grabbed Luna's arm and turned down the alley that was on our right, thank god it was there or they would have seen. The alley was dark , moist and full of missing bricks from the road underneath our feet. But it was a perfect spot to hear what my parents were saying. “Yes,  Bob I know what Jane  told me and then I caught Sage in the closet smoking so it’s true. Can you just bust down the door or something? '' said my mother. “ No Lydia, we can't just break the door that breaks in entering and I can't go back to prison.”  said my father angrly
      Luna and I just stood there until we finally came up with an idea,” can’t we just call the cops and say they are unwelcome at your house or even on your property,” I said. “ It's not a lie my dad did say that your parents aren’t welcome after that family dinner we had and they came in drunk and high out of their minds.” Luna said knowly. “Do you have a phone we can call on?” I asked . Luna shook her  head. “ but there is a gas station up the road that we can call on.” Luna responded. I agreed, we started walking to the gas station. 
                    By the time we got to the gas station our pizza was cold and with Luna not having a microwave we ended up throwing it away.” I’m sorry that we are in this mess because of me ``I said  shamefully.  Luna looked at me in utter shock “ hey it's not your fault that you were born into a family like that, so don’t apologies. ``Luna said softly. I asked the front counter worker if we could use her phone. Which she agreed to. Luna was the one to call the cops. I stood outside so that I wasn't a distraction.  After Luna made the call she came outside “ they said they would be there in twenty minutes tops, do you want to start heading back so that we can be there when they are?” ask Luna  `` yeah we probably should just so that my parents don’t talk their way out of leaving. But I ‘m going to just stay in the alley until they leave if that's okay?”  I answered back. Luna thought for a little bit then decided that was the best option
              When we got back to the alley, Luna kept walking to her house while I stayed in the alley way. I could hear them perfectly clear from where I was standing. I pulled my cigarette pack out my back jeans pocket and lit one. I took a long deep drag  when suddenly I heard my mother start screaming at what i'm asume is Luna. “ You slut of a bitch , dare keep us from our daughter. She is needed at home. Screamed my mother “ I'm sure where Sage is but I will tell you that if you guys were my parents I wouldn't come home either.” Luna said calmly.  “You can’t talk that way, tell she can’t talk to us that way Bob.” my mother whined. Officer Downey then spoke if you two don’t get off this young girl's property then I will have to arrest both of you. Bob, aren't you on probation? If I arrest you it  will be going against your probation, I will have to call your probation officer up and you will probably end up back in prison.
               I’m not sure what was said after that, it went quiet, when all of a sudden Luna pops around the corner shouting boo, scaring me which causes me to drop the cigarette from my mouth into a puddle. “ Luna,” I whined. She just laughed while giving another cigarette but not before she lit it herself and took a drag. I thanked “ Come on, I ordered a pizza that should be delivered five minutes from now, and it will probably be better to be behind closed doors than outside . Luna said reasonably. “ Yeah, did you order a meat lover’s extra cheese?” I said jokingly, “ You know it, “ Luna said while swinging her arm over my shoulder . 
               I opened the door to Luna’s house where “ hey can you set  the table i'm going to feed the ruffy.” asked Luna while going up the stairs to go feed her gecko. “ Sure, glass plates or plastic plates?” I shouted back. “ Paper” Luna says while coming down the stairs “so i don’t have a mess to clean up.” she said before helping me get the table prepared. 
       After a couple minutes there was a knock on the door. I went over to the door to open it, soon after I opened the door Johnny  was revealed  from behind the door.  Johnny teasingly  said “ I thought y’all bought a pizza already?” Luna then appeared right beside me, answering before I had a chance to talk. ``I just wanted to see you again, that's all.” while taking the pizza and handing Johnny the money to pay the cost and extra for him to have a good tip. “ oh really, i didn’t know you missed me so much.’’ Johnny flirty said back I was sure if it really was directed to Luna though. Luna giggled at his response. “ Hey, I'm going to find a channel on the television.''I said to Luna while taking the pizza from her hands. “ Yeah, I gotta go. I have more pizza to make and deliver, but I will see y'all tomorrow night .” Johnny said while weaving goodbye as he walked away. 
             Next morning, I woke up around ten thirty. I was the first to wake up so I went downstairs to see what I could have for breakfast. I decided on just a bowl of cheerios and a little bit of sugar. When I went to grab the milk there was a sudden knock on the door. I looked through the window to see it was. Standing at the stood my crush for tens years. “Luna, I know you're in there. Open up its cold. '' I opened the door so he could come. “Hey Oscar, I thought you weren't going to come back until your parents came home. I ask suspiciously. '' I was but I couldn't stay away from you, my little herb. Said Oscar with a smirk. I blushed softly. He always knew what to say, to make me blush. “ Why are you actually here?” I followed him up the stairs.  I was not behaving the way I was supposed to behave.  I didn’t know i wasn’t able to smoke on the train.” he said annoyed  i nodded “ where is my sister anyway?” Oscar asked . “ Oh she's still sleeping.” told him. Oscar started to walk in the direction of Luna’s room.  Oscar quietly opened the door, crept up to  her bed and  pounced on Luna, he immediately  started tickling her. “ Stop” screamed Luna trying her best not to laugh. “When did you come home from military school”? Ask luna after ocsar stopped with his torturing. 
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if i dont see tommorrow
If i don't see tomorrow
If I don't see tomorrow,  don't feel sad or guilty.
 You didn’t feel anything when I was giving signs why feel anything now, because Im gone, no don't feel remorse, feel glad this is what you wanted right , might well declare victory. You fought so hard to make me feel like shit might as well be excited that I am 6 feet in the ground.  Your name is written on the bullet that is in my head, do you want you to look at the autopsy , when they pull the bullet out my brain  see right there in sharpie your name, i wonder do you know what you were doing this whole time. All these years did you know that every hurtful word you said to me was going to get too much and i the golden child   was going to die the next night. While everyone was asleep I died and yes i was at fault.. But deep down you knew it was your fault that I could not continue on with life, so I lay down to finally feel peace within my mind. Was all the meds worth it, was it really worth me feeling incompetent. Why drug the children in the world but when they get over the age of 18 take away the medication so that they could actually feel how the world cards will be dealt , having to deal with all the emotions after feeling numb so that we are looking for something to help with the pain of overflowing emotions.  But then we get labeled as drug addicts because we grew up on pills to think that we are sick but that's not even what makes it the worse thing. It's the fact that we feel like we can't be good anymore that is why there is so much we can’t deal with because this world thinks that we need pills for everything. But that is not the topic we should be on right its the fact that i am the only one that can help solve the mystery of my own death, well what all have you came up with at this point, because this wouldn’t of been important if someone didn’t push the issue. The one that is pushing the issue is the one that normaling wants to know the truth so they keep looking but the one they should be looking for is in the ground , that would be the only truth. 
But i will see you again if its in hell or heaven. 
Or even in another lifetime
 By; strawberrynamedmaria
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new story should i keep on with the it first chapter
   March 1st  2016 
Isabela Warren,   11:37 a.m. 
 I have a test to today in bio class I do say myself I think I passed. Go me!
      But guess what Brayden  actually looked at me today,  I was blessed with seeing his amazing coffee blended brown eyes, you know the ones that just melt you away when lock eyes,  
     I wonder if he feels the same way about me? Does he get the warm fuzzy feeling I get? The I want  to own your incredible gaze. Or the urge to just protect you from everything and everyone like I do? But that's enough for now.
    With that I left my signature at the bottom carefully  tucking my diary into the hidden pocket in my bag. I don't know what I would if that would get out. But for my I have to focus on my work not on Brayden. 
     I looked over to were Brayden was seated expecting to see him there but when he wasn't. I made sure to quickly but still keeping my composer  to ask my lovely desk buddy  Candace  (a odd match honestly but we get the work done. ) where Brayden went ever so curiously. 
"Uh hey" I whispered  to Candace while I slightly nudged her.     
"What" her whispered back 
"Do you know where Brayden went off to I thought he was at his desk last time I saw him"  I whispered back 
 Girls don't make right you up for talking  said Mrs Simón  said without looking up from her stack of papers 
"Sorry Mrs. Simón it won't happen again" I quickly apologized I can't be written up how while I be able to see Brayden while he was at boxing in the Old Kinges boxing gym if I'm stuck here?  Exactly I can't. So I won't let that happen will I.
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Just a question to see in anyone else has a problem with [email protected]
Because when I first started talking to her she was super nice now she is making a post about me “ sharing nudes” ( I don’t even send nudes )
And trying to post it on insta if I don’t pay her money.
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