straighttoweird

[straighttoweird]

[straighttoweird]

Just realize breakfast is breaking a fast

Why

[straighttoweird]

Hiccup: *hiding something in his coat* I think we should adopt another kid!

Astrid: No

Hiccup: Why not?

Astrid: Because when you say “kid”, you mean “small dragon”, and we already have fifteen of those

Hiccup: *unzips coat* Sixteen

[straighttoweird]

hmmm why does my uterus hurt and why do i feel kinda off. weird. surely these are not the warning symptoms of a predictable biological process that occurs on a regular schedule. anyway. im going to wear white pants today.

[straighttoweird]

God mothers are strong

[straighttoweird]

Some environments are the equivalent of an active volcano. Not meant to thrive in but somehow it's everywhere and there is no escape

[straighttoweird]

it's attractive when someone stays up late just to talk to you

[straighttoweird]

Terrible day to know nursery rhyme thank you

Silly things happen on tumblr dot com

[straighttoweird]

Sometimes I read

Sometimes I past the time

Owing to the flood of shallow books which really are exhausted in one reading, the modern mind tends to think every book is the same, finished in one reading. But it is not so. And gradually the modern mind will realise it again. The real joy of a book lies in reading it over and over again, and always, finding it different, coming upon another meaning, another level of meaning. It is, as usual, a question of values: we are so overwhelmed with quantities of books, that we hardly realise any more that a book can be valuable, valuable like a jewel, or a lovely picture, into which you can look deeper and deeper and get a more profound experience every time. It is far, far better to read one book six times, at intervals, than to read six several books. Because if a certain book can call you to read it six times, it will be a deeper and deeper experience each time, and will enrich the whole soul, emotional and mental. Whereas six books read once only are merely an accumulation of superficial interest, the burdensome accumulation of modern days, quantity without real value.

D. H. LAWRENCE

[straighttoweird]

Lol

“It takes two to make an accident.”

— F. Scott Fitzgerald; The Great Gatsby

[straighttoweird]

“A ship is safe in harbor, but that’s not what ships are for.”

— William G.T. Shedd

[straighttoweird]

There's a lot of reasons to sleep with your enemy. And by a lot I mean a few.

By a few I mean a dagger to the heart.

[straighttoweird]

Best can I do is being a guy frozen in a hunched pose that you tap on the shoulder to reveal my pallid yet smiling face and set the unsettling tone for the adventure to come

Modern life isn't working out. Maybe I should fall into a frozen lake after climbing over the graveyard wall and narrowly avoiding being hit by a train and be transported to a strange and dangerous purgatory world full of unusual and eccentric characters.

[straighttoweird]

All problems in the world can be solved without conflict of interest.

Lack of cheese? The world is now a gigantic cheese production line. Dairy cows abound. Tens new strains of cheese bacteria discovered in weeks. CRISPR technique to edit out lactose intolerance developed. The world has cheese.

Unfortunately banana socks go against the dresscode and Paula kinda regrets the years she spent in nursing school.

[straighttoweird]

The math checked out long ago. It's no longer in me don't ask me to count anything math already checked out

[straighttoweird]

I love those "asking cosplayers at a con what their day job is" videos because it's always like

*muffled voice issuing from a huge suit of armor* im a cybersecurity specialist

[straighttoweird]

There's a lot of reason to wake up in the middle of the night. The desire to eat banana pancake with ketchup and a steak is one.