storiesforthegloryofgod

[storiesforthegloryofgod]

Date written: December 4, 2022

I know the word GRACE by definition.

Grace means “Unmerited favor. Undeserved merit. Something that you and I can NEVER earn because it is freely given to the UNDESERVING”

But sometimes I find it hard to reconcile that the LORD would love a wretch like me. Not that I am doing anything heinous, but I am aware that God sees the intentions, motivations and the very depths of my heart. After all, sin is still a sin in the eyes of a holy, righteous and just God. That is why I can never boast of my righteousness because there is NONE.

I would often find my heart dwelling with so much rage, hate and bitterness due to the “unfortunate” situations that I’ve been through. (NB: I do not project it on the outside. I would never lash out on other people. It is my firm belief that no matter what I feel on the inside is NOT a license/free pass for bad behavior.) Although, I must confess that some events happened because of my poor life decisions that were brought about my disobedience to the Word of God.

In spite of that, the Scripture reminds believers that God’s acceptance is not predicated upon our own righteousness, but on Christ’s righteousness and His finished work on the cross. That even though we are dead in our trespasses, we are alive in Christ Jesus. If we truly repent of our sins, and put our faith in Him.

May we, just like the Apostle Paul, beat our chest and cry at the top of our lungs as we utter these words “Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body that is subject to death…” BUT never stop there. Like him, may we also continually remind ourselves and rejoice over the fact that Christ came to the world not to condemn the world but to save sinners through Him

Happy Lord’s day.

[storiesforthegloryofgod]

“There is no distance

That cannot be covered

Over and over

You're not defenseless I'll be your shelter I'll be your armor

I hear you whisper underneath your breath

I hear your SOS, your SOS

I will send out an army to find you

In the middle of the darkest night

It's true I will rescue you

I will never stop marching to reach you

In the middle of the hardest fight

It's true,

I will rescue you” — Rescue, Lauren Daigle

Being able to feel things deeply can be a blessing or a curse.

This may be odd to some, but whenever I read a book, listen to people, podcasts, songs or even sermons, I have the ability to absorb emotions from a third-person point of view (which is toxic on some occasions) as if I am experiencing it firsthand. But the aforementioned lyrics is one of the few instances why I rejoice with this so-called “gift.”

[For those of you who are not aware, my heart is prone to wander away from the Lord. My heart is typically inclined and enticed from the things of the world. That’s why if I am NOT intentional about fighting for the disciplines of grace (prayer, Bible-reading, fellowship with believers and attending the Lord’s day), I catch myself acting in a manner that is not worthy of the Gospel, a Christian that is not distinct from the world.]

As I was digesting the lyrics of the song (it was my first time hearing it by the way), my heart began to ache and at the same time, rejoice. My heart is filled with so much joy knowing that in spite of my constant failures and backslidings, He continually pursues me and accepts me despite of who I am. That He loves me unconditionally, at this very moment and NOT the “better” future version of me.

“While we were still SINNERS Christ died for us..” Romans 5:8

In all honesty, I oftentimes get exhausted about the Christian life. I feel disheartened and frustrated about the battle that is waging war within my soul.

“I can’t believe that I failed again. The Lord surely hates me.” is one of the countless narratives inside my head.

I can completely resonate with the angst of Apostle Paul

“For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate.  Now if I do what I do not want, I agree with the law, that it is good.  So now it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me.  For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out.  For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing.” -Romans 7:15-19

Although I can cite a bunch of verses that would clearly contradict my thoughts and feelings, I can’t help not to think of my frequent stumbling in the Christian life. My inner being can’t reconcile how can a holy God can love someone like me. Maybe because I am so used to the transactional and conditional type of love — that if I don’t act right, I will be punished and if I am not able to bring anything valuable to the table, I am hated and considered as useless.

(And I know… it’s a trauma response.)

However, I must continually remind myself that the Lord is NOT like us human beings—frail, wretched and bound to fail etc.

We can trust His Word because “God is not a man, that he should lie..” (Numbers 23:19) and that even if we are unfaithful, it doesn’t nullify the faithfulness of God. (Romans 3:13)

So I’ve come to the realization that whenever we feel condemned about our sin, we should tap onto the waterfall of grace and ponder on the Lord’s great love for us. For His love will surely compel us to change.

His kindness will lead us to repentance

"I know some of you are greatly distressed because you cannot love Christ as much as you would like to do and you keep on fretting because it is so. Now just forget your own love to Him and think of His great love to you and then immediately your love will come to something more like that with which you desire it to be.” -C.H. Spurgeon

PS: Just a caveat

The Lord is loving, gracious, forgiving and kind, but the Lord is also GOOD, holy righteous and just… And He who is good surely hates what is EVIL. We should never use His grace as a license to sin.

[storiesforthegloryofgod]

[storiesforthegloryofgod]

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[storiesforthegloryofgod]

I want to be known as kind, gentle, light. I want to be a vessel for the grace of Christ. I want every word I speak to be soft and firm, true and loving. I want to make people feel loved.

a.k.  (via shepraises)

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Jesus knew okay. He knew you would mess up that time. He knew you would fail that time. He knew you would make a mistake that time. He knew you’d let that person down that time. He knew you’d stray from Him that time. He knew you’d disobey Him that time. He knew you’d sin against Him that time. And guess what. He still died for you. He knew on that cross every mistake you were ever going to make and He still died for you anyway. Is that not proof enough that in times of weakness we should run TO Him, not away. He died so that you could come to Him in everything. Don’t waste that.

[storiesforthegloryofgod]

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Sometimes I forget to listen. I forget to let a friend be. To tell their whole story and paint their full heart into the air.

I’m too eager to respond with a fix, a solution, a plan. I interrupt the art. I look for a pause to jump in and offer all sorts of articulate banter, when this isn’t what they want. They just want to speak until they’re out of breath, and then meet eyes and feel like they’re okay and understood and not alone. It’s a beautiful thing, and I want to let it happen. I want to let them finish painting in their own words. And then maybe I will understand. — J

[storiesforthegloryofgod]

[storiesforthegloryofgod]

[storiesforthegloryofgod]