steampaul

[steampaul]

alright so Pangur got her claw stuck while rolling over in bed, and then just GAVE UP, which led to her being horizontally flattened in a way that gives her impossible girth and...... I'll share, but just know that it's an optical illusion. please. I swear to god she's a healthy weight. I mean, a little chubby, but not like this.

[steampaul]

Ken Unsworth: Suspended Stone Circle (1978)

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[steampaul]

You are a local baronet, and while you have family wealth, you also have a terrible curse. Hundreds of years ago a witch cursed your bloodline, and now you must commit a crime a day forever or die.

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[steampaul]

“they were flirting with you” and how was i supposed to know such a thing when everyone speaks in codes and puzzles

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Imagine it's your last day alive and you're having to spend it with JD Vance 😭

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fries. envelopes. ive been awake for 18 hours can i go to bed now.

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*heavy southern accent*: terfs aint got no friends

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[steampaul]

adventure time slang is weird cuz like. when you first watch the show and hear the slang you're like "oh this is cringy slang but its not like awful" but it gets to a point where the voice actors deliver the slang so naturally you don't even notice it and its just. part of the world's vernacular. I can't think of any other show that's done in-universe slang like this

[steampaul]

daily affirmations

i am the unkillable faggot

i can exist in grocery stores

i have the shittiest music taste in any room

i have a gun

[steampaul]

4:35 Blaze it sorry traffic was crazy