squeaky-n-blushy

[squeaky-n-blushy]

Y'know ? Y'know .

[squeaky-n-blushy]

Let Me Take Care Of You

Or: How To Say I'm In Love Without Words

Kanene's Notes: FEBRUARY, 13TH, YA KNOW WHAT A SPECIAL DAY IT IS? IT'S @squeaky-n-blushy's BIRTHDAY!!!!! <3 <3 <3 I made this special gift for her and I do hope all of you enjoy this just as much, as well ^v^)s2 It was a delight to write this story

Also, all the most and dearest thanks to @a-fluffer-nutter for being such an incredible Beta-Reader!! Thank so so much! :D :DD <3

Warnings: Mentions and suggestive themes here and there, nothing too explicit but still. Lots of antecipation, soft, rough and mouth tickles (raspberries, nibbles etc). Romatic Pairing. Around 16.000 words

[~*~]

It was as soft as it looked. 

That was Meng Yao’s first thought as the simple, wooden comb carded through those lustrous, dark black hair, fingers holding each patch next to his roots firmly to lessen the discomfort as he undid another knot, twisting the unworthy comb here and there and purposely not thinking too much about how Lan Xichen was quiet, letting out sparse and tiny sounds of relaxation, which made each one of his fingertips tremble.

A firm brush and the last knot gave in, leaving Meng Yao to add a little more of perfuming oil to help the dehydrated strands and pretend he had more reasons to keep brushing. 

If he didn’t know better than to lie so bluntly to himself, he would say that all of his lasting touch and everlasting care was nothing but a necessity, since keeping himself on Lan Xichen’s good side was important, no, essential for his future. He could pretend that there was no actual, true contentment in seeing his hair begin little by little to gain back its smoothness and softness it once held. He could say that buying that fancy oil that lasted through several hours was simply a necessary sacrifice. He would never take the risk of using his simple, cheap one and having the other’s hair react badly after years of receiving nothing but the best treatment, after all, not with someone so important as the very heir, now leader, of the Gusu Lan Sect. He could even argue that helping him this moment was nothing more than a part of his carefully sewn together plan, only so that after this war Lan Xichen, or better, the leader of the righteous, just and grand Lan Sect, would pull him so higher than ever on the social hierarchy much quickly than the years he would have to wait otherwise, finally being able to start the plan of climbing much further way, so that his father would have no right or opportunity to throw him down and look away again.

(For a moment he imagined it, being draped in the Jin Sect’s bright and fancy robes, using a gold comb that he would be able to decorate Xichen’s hair with it, letting it shine bright amidst that sea of black, finally giving him something worth of keeping, adorning, marking the First Jade of Gusu Lan.)

The oil had an unpleasant sensation, much better than the ones he used but still too cold and lasting all the same. Meng Yao knew that even washing it off wouldn’t be enough to take the smell and slippery touch away. Even so, the irritation was light, going as quickly as it came as he carded his hands through every strand, being careful to coat each one of them equally.

Unfortunately, Meng Yao knew himself better than this. The very moment he kneeled on his bed and Xichen easily fell on the floor in front of him, showing him his back so easily and closing his eyes at the first movements of his comb, Meng Yao felt his entire soul falter unstably. When he parted his hair in half and got the full view (and not only the small glimpse when they trained together and his mind would unfortunately focus on futile and useless non-combat information) of the back of his neck and his mouth parted instinctively. When he experimentally (“accidentally”) scratched his scalp and got a muffled pleased sound, so tiny and vulnerable that it made his mind hone in, instinctively in attention, his fingers moved on their own, combing, scratching and mapping which places left Xichen melting and leaning more and more on him. He engraved every bit of information in the fiber of his muscles, so they could continue as his mind wandered in senseless daydreams. 

The moment Meng Yao finally looked up to his window, watched the moon set much higher than he thought in the sky, when he realized he had no idea how much time had passed, that was the moment he knew that there was no turning back for him.

He continued his ministrations, burrowing his hand carefully under the hair until his fingers could scrape at his scalp, seeing the shiver that ran down his shoulders, skin prickling with goosebumps. Slowly, he straightened his hair once more, scooting closer to the edge of his mattress and tipping slightly forward so Xichen could lay comfortably on his torso, feeling as the taller one practically let all his weight fall on him. Looking down, he saw the Lan stare back at him with a comfortable and open smile on his face, eyelids closing and opening slowly enough for Meng Yao to be absorbed, smothered, and surrounded by the sheer adoration and trust clear on his gaze. It took everything from the Jin to survive as the other sighed and became completely lax on his chest, head fitting the crook of his neck as if it was always meant to be there. 

Later, Meng Yao decided, he would throw himself in the coldest bath he could arrange and then organize his thoughts. For now, all he could do was to take a (non-shuddering) deep breath and not snuggle closer to the warmth. It’s was an awkward position, but worth the slight uncomfortable bending of his arm, to gather all his hair in one hand (he was planning to make a loose braid for easy caring in the morning but unfortunately his plan had been thrown away due the circumstances, again) and combing the most stubborn strands together. As his touch neared the back of his ear, Lan Xichen twitched slightly on his hold.

The shorter man didn’t even bat an eye to the sudden desire in own chest to kiss the other’s temple in a soothing gesture so he could go back to sleep peacefully. 

(And what a heresy that would be. Living so far away from Gusu Lan, his knowledge about their customs was still sparse, but, even in the eyes of an ignorant it would be clear how their forehead ribbons are important for the Lans, and Lan Xichen held an absolute care for his. Meng Yao could never try to taint the white fabric with his dirty self.)

Therefore, with a lighter touch, in apology, he spared only two fingers and his most careful touch and went back to the spot to straighten the rebelled, short strands. Once more, Xichen twisted the slightest bit away from his touch, snuggling and worming himself closer to his neck. Mumbled words hit his skin and set fire across his every nerve.

“Funny ich.” Xichen mumbled, clearly still lost in his sleep. 

Meng Yao closed his eyes and held his body together to not crumble, scream nor do anything at the new information acquired. He now knew how it felt to hold Lan Xichen so close that he could feel each letter leaving his lips, he knew how his hair felt and how he curled in himself closer to any warmth when sleeping and his mind was still processing all of this. Locking his reaction in a far corner away in his mind, Meng Yao smiled and shook his shoulder lightly.

“Come to bed, ge, I am already finished.”

Xichen let out a confused displeased sound at the prospect of moving, turning around only enough to fall on the mattress then pull the rest of his body from the floor. Meng Yao huffed in amusement and carefully got out of the bed before he could get stuck on it (much to his own irrational and dangerous instinctive displeasure) and adjusted his torn but thick blanket over the other. With a quick turn and fast steps, he moved away to finish his daily chores and reflect about all the findings of this day.

[...]

Concentrating on the meeting was… difficult. Ever since his scum of father died just as he lived and Jin Zixuan assumed the title of Sect Leader together with Jin Yanli, Jin Guangyao found himself drifting away more often than not, senses not as high and body tensed as he turned every corner in Koi Tower. Somehow a part of himself slowly began to try to trust the peaceful life he has been living for years now. 

The Jin Sect, and especially himself, held plenty of enemies, even more after the victory in the Sunshot Campaign due to the short period where the sect turned its back to all the other three Great Sects and formed an alliance with the Wen. The entire revolution against Jin Guangshan and the rise of Jin Zixuan over his father, ending their support to the tyrant sect had been a good move to improve the cultivation world’s opinion against them. Even so, years after the war, the palace was still full of dangerous enemies that were just looking for just the tiniest show of weakness to latch on and destroy everything Jin Guangyao had been so dutifully building all along. 

All of this made him come to the conclusion and admit, even if begrudgingly, that his (extremely awkward and quite dumb) brother was not one of those enemies. His spouse, the oldest daughter from the very own Violet Spider herself, even if weak in cultivation, was still much attentive and plenty aware of his backgrounds, watching and taking care of the inwards work of the palace with almost as much influence of him himself. 

Yet, even with the power she held, the possibility to throw him away if she ever decided he was a danger to her spouse’s throne, her kindness was warm and gentle as she kept greeting him with a sincere smile, continued to call him closer to hold and distract his nephew (small and gurgling and so, so fragile in his arms, learning how to babble shushu when he saw him and unmercifully keeping a tight grip on his heart), called him day after day to share meals with her (their) family and spend uncountable afternoons coaxing (although he pretended to not notice for politeness) Zixuan to expend more leisure time with his brother. 

As time passed, the wish of showing them Lan Xichen grew stronger, to introduce him to them beyond his title in the Lan Sect, beyond his duty as a leader, beyond their political meetings and administrative trades. Jin Guangyao, on the slowest days, found himself planning how he would present their story together, and how he could explain (never completely, of course) the attachment they both shared and that only grew stronger with the years that went by. He hated the weakness, but would not lie to himself and pretend to not wish to show his family (beyond the tablet offerings he held in a beautiful constructed house and shrine on an isolated part of the family’s grounds), for the first time ever, who was his biggest weakness and the one he ever and most cared for. 

Sometimes, Jin Guangyao would pretend that if this ever happened it would go well, that he would have no lasting, almost animal fear at them knowing, that he would not cave to despair in the last second and cancel all the plannings while hiding Lan Xichen away, that the little apprehension held would immediately dissipate when Jin Furen smiled and approached quickly to hold their hands together, true happiness shining clear across her face and Sect Leader Jin (his brother) would freeze in an amusing surprise, would stutter and clear his throat and then say that he was happy for them, then pass through all the phases of grief as he re-contextualized all the “meetings” he had found Jin Guangyao and Lan Xichen together. In the end, he could imagine that they would not only accept, but also be content for him, for what he was able to find, for what they were all able to attain even through the darkest times of their lives.

It’s been years since the end of the war, years since his bruises healed and no one dared to lift a finger on him again in the Koi Tower, where he stood proud and confident on top of the stairs he was once thrown away, years since he proved his worth as a warrior and an advisor and guaranteed a place at the Sect Leader and Jin Furen’s side, since he became essential to the working of his sect. It had not been years (yet), still time passed as he began showing more real smiles and his body learned how to not live on the edge of danger every single day. 

Nowadays, he no longer scrambled so fiercely for information, worried to quickly build a trustful enough chain of spies across every important sect. Now, he already knew personally every attendant in that meeting room, their every relationship with each other, all trade and internal discussion and danger to his sect. His notes were extensive about each leader, each advisor and important disciples in their sects and years of gathering all of this had paid off. There was not a single person in this room who Jin Guangyao didn’t know their every telling and strategy.

And even if he didn’t know any of them… he would be forever personally attuned to the only one who was currently haunting his mind and making it wander in worry like this. Sect Leader Lan: Lan Xichen. Lan Huan.

Something was happening to him.

It was clear with the tight corners of his polite smile, the way his gaze unfocused from time to time, how he kept pulling his posture straighter and straighter as if afraid it would fall otherwise, how his feather hadn't taken a single note for almost an hour. It was the way Lan Wangji looked at him from the tail of his eye, impassive expression setting into a (displeased? worried? annoyed? disapproving? Probably a mix of it all) restless press of lips and he took a more active role in the discussion. Even Da-ge kept frowning from his seat, not even disguising at whom those sharp eyes were directed to, the brute. The only reason Jin Guangyao wasn’t rolling his eyes (besides how he would never be foolish enough to show his feelings in a room full of strangers and possible enemies, different from other leaders as it seems) and calling his attention subtlety for himself was because the others were still ignorant and naive enough to think Mingjue’s expression could only mean irritation at the poor and important Sect Leader Lan. Which reasons and rumors would be spread afterwards to justify their own interpretations of reality was something that Guangyao would be careful to search about later and deal with, if necessary.

At the moment, however, he had a much more important task in mind.

Half a shichen after the end of the banquet was announced, when all the absolute necessary conversations had already been held, Jin Guangyao excused himself to go to his quarters, throwing a meaningful glance (and slight warning, if he was being honest) to his leader and then following swiftly to the room he had gifted the Lan a couple years ago, decorated and designed entirely in Gusu Lan style and Xichen’s own personal preferences. As he approached, he was relieved to notice Mingjue going away in the distance, knowing his calculations had been right and he would have some proper alone time for his task. 

He waited a few moments outside the door, giving the other enough time to prepare more tea (they already knew each other so well) before rasping his knuckles on the threshold. 

“Er-ge,” his words were low and soft on their own, greeting the taller one as soon as he opened the door and let him inside. “Your work in Cloud Recesses is being truly unforgiving, to hurt your sleep schedule like this.”

“A-Yao.” Xichen smiled tiredly, agreeing with him as he passed the tea. Jin Guangyao quickly took the opportunity to get their hands together in a warm, comforting hold, thumbs slowly and carefully grazing their back in a soft touch, receiving a tiny, pleased sigh in answer. Minutes passed in silence before a quiet, defeated voice filled the space. “Wangji is trying to adopt A-Yuan into the Lan Sect.”

Jin Guangyao blinked, momentarily stunned. The information Su She passed to him was right after all. Somehow, it made sense. “It is difficult to adapt an already formed boy to the Lan rules. Your elders must be displeased.”

“More than that. They call it a disrespect and dishonor to our father, to bring anyone who holds the Wen name into Gusu Lan after all the blood spilled, especially into the main family.” His voice got even more tired. “Besides, Sect Leader Jiang has already claimed a similar proposal. If he succeeds in adding A-Yuan to his sect, it’s no doubt that Wangji will follow and spend more visits to the Yunmeng Sect than he does already.”

“Can we expect the Lotus Pier to gain another disciple soon, then?” Jin Guangyao remarked with a playful voice, succeeding in pulling those downward golden gaze to his face. Lan Xichen, probably with the same mental image of Lan Wangji serious face amidst a crowd of unruly disciples causing a ruckus in purple robes, huffed a laugh.

“A-Yao.” He chided weakly, then pressed his lips in a light irritation. “Wei-gongzi hasn’t even replied to any of Wangji’s courting attempts in any way nor form, nevertheless. Besides, my brother is a very important part of Gusu Lan, in the case of any future proposal, his parting to Yunmeng Sect will not be possible, of course.”

“Of course.” He replied swiftly, glad that he would not be present in that wedding discussion, even if Yanli-Furen would for certain be. Even if Wei Wuxian still showed no interest in the courtship, there was no mistake in the way his expression brightened and his touches lingered anytime Hanguang Jun was close. There was no doubt they would be reciprocated in the future.

Similarly, there was no mistaking how both of them were absolutely wrapped around Wen Yuan’s little finger. Even if Xichen, and possibly Sect Leader Jiang, held a soft spot for him as well, to want an adoption into the main family of Great Sect is already a huge move that would undoubtedly result into a nightmare under any circumstance. Ever since the war, the Wen Sect had been falling into a steady decadence, even under the giants efforts of Wen Qing, now Sect Leader, due all the sanctions and repayments the other sects demanded to prevent their full extermination after their victory. It would still take plenty of years for it to be even considered a Great Sect once more, even so, the fact that it held amiably enough relations with the Yunmeng Jiang and Gusu Lan Sect was a good thing. 

A comfortable silence surrounded them as he thought carefully in his answer. Jin Guangyao squeezed Xichen’s hand firmly in his, waiting for them to squeeze back before going back to the soothing rubs. “Er-ge, sure Hanguang Jun is aware how his wishes would be received by your elders and is grateful for the support you’ve been showing him so far, just as he must be aware of your limitations even and especially because of your position as the leader of the sect. He can’t expect you to solve such a sensitive matter by yourself so quickly.”

Lan Xichen turned to the side, lips pressing down even harder. Jin Guangyao could see clearly the words he had just swallowed.

“It’s not fair for no one to expect this from you.” 

Lan Xichen tensed and then exhaled, shoulders dropping, a clear invitation for him to get closer, which he did promptly.

“Even after his fair punishment, they continue to pressure him too much, some had been against his position as a teacher, saying he would teach our young generations wrong doings. I keep expecting to… find him gone.” His body tilted to his right and Jin Guangyao immediately crossed the table to press closer, supporting his weight. After a pause, he continued. “It’s foolish to think so, I know. There are still too many precious things in Gusu Lan for him. Who would remember all the 50 names he gave each bunny?” Jin Guangyao softly pulled his head to rest on his and he went easily. “It’s simply… Foundless fear, I know, and yet I keep finding myself too tired to push those frivolous thoughts away.”

“An excessive load of work, exhaustive conflicts and little sleep can do that, I’ve heard.” Lan Xichen sagged on him even more in protest, which made him curl lower, knowing he was right. Gracefully, Jin Guangyao simply pressed closer, one hand letting go of his hand to play with his hair. 

The true, effective way to help this situation was on the tip of his tongue, and yet Jin Guangyao faltered for a moment. In another moment of his life his words would be different, but it’s been years ever since family was simply a memory of the past and the people he trusted could be counted on two fingers. Nowadays… It was different.

“I am sure he appreciates your effort, and er-ge couldn’t be more right to say he still has too many precious things in Gusu to walk away. He has you, your shufu, his students and an entire life in your sect. There are… extremely rare and few things that could ever be more important than that. Even if the problem that brought this is unfortunately something that only time will bring your solution, your feelings might have an easier route to be assured.” He didn’t even need to see Xichen’s face to visualize the doubt there, in himself, so he pushed. “Perhaps it would be beneficial to confront Wangji about your fears. I am afraid anyone else won’t be truly able to vanish your thoughts except your brother.”

The other got quiet. After a few moments, Lan Xichen turned around and burrowed his face on his hair, taking a deep breath.

“‘don’t want to,” he murmured, a hint of a whine in his words. The change from his usual collected, almost poetic way to talk not so different from an unhappy child made Jin Guangyao almost snort in surprise, a chuckle escaping him anyway.

“I am afraid you will have to.” He smiled adoringly and melancholically playing with his strands, taking the offered chance to lighten the subject. “Or perhaps er-ge would enjoy the privileges of living in this humble one’s room? I’ve known you make a good pillow.”

Lan Xichen smirked and giggled quietly. “So I’ve heard.”

Going back to his upright position, Lan Xichen looked at him with a hopeful, a bit sad still, light in those mesmerizing golden eyes. Jin Guangyao let go of him and straightened himself as well, hands resting on his lap where they could hide his twitching fingers, hungry for more. He answered with attentive and open attention the clear question in Xichen’s body and expression.

“Unfortunately, I won’t be able to accept your offer today. If A-Yao is willing, however, tomorrow I would be more than happy to spend the afternoon here.”

Finally.

Jin Guangyao smiled, eyes crinkling, dimples showing.

“Er-ge will be of course the most welcome.”

[...]

“I truly apologize, A-Yao.” 

Jin Guangyao was sure that there was no flaw in his posture or expression, not a single hint that he was bothered as he prepared their tea and tried to not brood about how Xichen had brought his paperwork to his room. After so many years passed together, however, the Jin wasn’t really surprised that the Lan noticed nevertheless.

But Xichen sounded truly apologetic and the fact that he was unable to finish his necessary work only confirmed his suspicions of how much exhausted his beloved truly was. It would be no surprise when he confessed to having passed out on his desk later in the night, and yet, it bothered his heart imagining the scene all the same.

His plan must start immediately.

“It’s no matter, er-ge.” As he gave the tea to Xichen, he let his finger graze and almost rest on the other’s hand, pulling it slow enough for the touch to last and bring the attention to him. With a sweeter tune, soft enough to let Xichen imagine how it would sound if they were even closer, he continued, “Are you sure that there is no way that my help would be welcome?”

As expected, Xichen’s hand quickly took his, turning around and intertwining their fingers until Guangyao could feel each calluses born from years of being a musician and a fighter. Jin Guangyao was weak, so, so weak, so he moved closer.

“You’re always welcome, A-Yao.” He saw, however, the signs of refusal before the words began falling from his lips, and so he controlled his disappointment. Xichen’s hand squeezed his tighter and his eyelids twitched as if they wanted to press close. “But those letters need to hold my own handwriting and words, any less would be received as a careless act at best and an insult at worst. There are also permissions and revisions that only the Sect Leader can deal with.” He let out a tiny smile at the empathy coloring the other’s expression. “It will take less than half an incense stick, A-Yao, and then we can enjoy better this slow afternoon given to us. I won’t take long, I promise.”

Jin Guangyao was already expecting the answer, yet his heart still singing in realizing Lan Xichen hadn’t even doubted a second to bring such personal and important matters from his sect to his room, as if it wasn’t one of the biggest show of trust someone as important as him could show. Jin Guangyao lifted their hands and brought those long and skillful fingers to his lips, laying tiny, fleeting kisses in each one of his knuckles. Looking up and seeing the flustered state of the other, Guangyao let a small, mischievous grin grow, before letting it transform into a softer one, dimples showing. 

“Let this lowly one still be of your assistance then.”

“A-Yao-” The protesting words were already low and weak enough that it didn’t take more than a nip at the tip of his finger to stop them. Before he even had the chance to recover from such an attack, Jin Guangyao quickly slipped behind him, hands resting on his shoulders and pressing them softly enough to let his intentions clear. “Ah, please, there is no need…” He took in a quick breath as Guangyao dug in and massaged the muscles soothingly, from his shoulders to his arms then going back to his shoulders and resting at the base of his neck, thumbs pressing firmly as they followed his spine to his nape, before descending and starting the cycle again. When the protest came back, it held a hint of a pleased groan on it. “You must have so much work as well, truly. I am fine.”

This reminded him of their fugitive days in the war, about how Lan Xichen would flinch away from his touch on those first days, waking up in jolts and nightmares, then tense and stay still as proud, hurt statue, protesting his care even after growing much more comfortable and trustful in him. 

It’s been years since then and not only Xichen had grown much better at receiving back the love that he was so free to give, but also Jin Guangyao has also grown much better at coaxing his body and mind to relax, no longer holding back if it meant he would get the other to lighten. It was a pity that he couldn’t set all those papers on fire and command all his obligations to leave him alone, but at least he could make his moment of work much more bearable.

He only needed to convince the Lan to give him a permission that both of them desired so much.

“My heart,” he gathered his hair in one hand and pushed it to the side, just enough that one of his shoulders would be free for him to lay a single caring kiss at the base of his neck, giving him the perfect view of how he froze and swallowed at his actions. It was a blessing the other was wearing fewer layers of robes. “Please, wouldn’t you be so kind as to let me help? Ease the hurt I have in seeing you so stressed and exhausted like this.” Another kiss, he could feel the way  Xichen shivered in reply. “The same way you tended and took care of my bruises during the years we’ve known each other, won’t you let me show my care for you in the same way as well?”

A warm hand found the way to his cheeks and Jin Guangyao batted his eyelashes slowly to the golden eye that watched him so fondly, prying a huff of laughter from Xichen, who already recognized such song and dance so well. The cool hand brushed a lovely path from the corner of his mouth to his eyebrows, tracing them and his eyelids with  care, making him hum and widen even more his pleading gaze. 

“My A-Yao, if I tended you for every moment of our lives until the end of mine, still it wouldn’t be enough to repay all the care you’ve shown me.”

Jin Guangyao softened. “What a sad scenario, er-ge. If that was so, then I would be nothing happy to find immortality, only if to take care of you through every single reincarnation.” The hand in his face faltered and A-Yao kept it in place with his own, turning around to kiss his palm, but not straying too long from his look. “But, please, er-ge, don’t torture me for so long and let me cherish you right now.” 

Lan Xichen let out a shuddering sigh and his posture relaxed. 

Perfect.

“I might now have such skilled hands as the honored Sect Leader Lan, but I would be happy to give you a humble massage.”

Xichen tittered in small puffs of laughter. “Please, A-Yao, you know the quality of my massages first hand.”

Jin Guangyao chuckled too, very much aware of how the widely known Lan arm strength has both its blessings and curses, and unfortunately the Lan couldn’t give a proper massage to save his life. Jin Guangyao patted his hand, voice and action completely full of condescending. “It was simply a matter of tasks. We both agree to have found enough uses for your strong hands posteriorly.”

It was very endearing how, after feeling how Xichen’s hand clamped forcefully on his waist in a “massage”, Jin Guangyao lost every last thread of control (in his defense, those days had been difficult in more ways than one can explain) and yet it was the Lan who kept blushing every time he mentioned that changing moment of their past. Absolutely endearing.

Jin Guangyao tried to not show too much smugness at it. For the way Xichen turned and by his contesting tune, he wasn’t very successful. “We found plenty of your hands’ abilities as well.”

There were some perks in growing up in a brothel, after all. 

“A-Yao is perfectly skilled in plenty of the seven arts. There is no doubt of his ability handling a sword, reciting poems and declaiming beautiful stories to lucky ears,” the leader turned around, exaggerated a sigh leaving his lips and took his brush back, dipping it in ink. “How mean is to use such talent to tease his poor Huan.”

Jin Guangyao kissed his shoulder again in apology, a grin playing on his lips. They fell into a comfortable silence.

He did a quick work of putting Xichen’s hair into a long and loose braid, giving plenty of scratches on his nape that kept pulling tiny and happy muffled sounds all while, celebrating quietly the new gained free space for him to work with. After pushing delicately said braid aside and positioning his palms on each shoulder, thumbs meeting in the middle, he began.

Unlike most of the books he had found lying around the brothel, massages weren’t really a very sexy thing for him. Before, he barely was able to relax every time anyone except his mother got close to him, much less if they tried to touch him in any way. After meeting Lan Xichen, he found that even when giving it, his mind narrowed too much on the thoughts of finding each knot to press them until the muscle went lax again, exploring each little spot that would have the other groaning and then relaxing, then exchanging properly between rubbing, pressing and sliding until the tension was forced to go away and Xichen became become a pliant mess under his palms. Without the proper fragrant oil, Xichen wouldn’t appreciate much squeezing and digging anywhere that wasn’t his shoulders (always so tense) and, lately, his lower back (which was a possible result of spending much more time mending discussions and dealing with paperwork) so he would have to be attentive to give each part of his back a proper attention.

With that in mind, Jin Guangyao slides his thumbs on the sides of his spine, getting to his nape and massaging the lovely sensitive skin there, before sliding his thumbs to his shoulders, following the lines to his arms, going back and forth from the base of his neck to his biceps repeatedly, pressing firmly on the muscles and quickly using his palms as leverage so he could rub circles on the, coaxing the stress away. He mixed firm squeezes and lighter touches all around the muscles, quickly finding any stubborn knot and digging on it with his thumbs then (more lightly) his knuckles. After spending a good time on his shoulders, the Jin went down, palms descending next to his spine until they diverted on his lower back, fingers spreading and circling his waist, focusing there with more massaging circles and momentarily squeezes before letting a softer touch guide his hands, palms flat on the skin, the tip of his fingers brushing softly on the skin, back to his shoulders, repeating the cycle until the Jin could feel less and less tension the more he explored around.

A pleased grunt, a bit louder than Xichen would ever allow himself if his guards weren’t down, floated in the room and pulled Guangyao’s mind from his task. The Sect Leader let out a content, long sigh as he pulled himself back to his full height, not so tightly held like before, as he adjusted the papers in his hands. Thankfully, he was plenty aware of himself and the sheer force and determination that A-Yao is when focused on something to not even dare to try to write a single letter during his massage. It was a good thing he still had plenty of paperwork that only needed a superficial analysis and his signature.

Good. 

Jin Guangyao watches the way Xichen rolls his shoulders and then turns around to smile, grateful at him. He huffs a laugh when Guangyao turns him right back around, since none of their work is done and, for as nice as it is to see the Lan soft and relaxed, it would be even better if he finished all his paperwork already so they could better enjoy their afternoon. 

Putting his hands flat on his back, Guangyao began leaving soothing rubs on the skin, receiving a happy humming in turn. The light touch followed the line to his ribs, carefully tracing the spaces and bones there before going up to caress his shoulders and then run down until they could graze his sides. It was a very thin line in letting his touch firm enough to not tense Xichen by mistake and, at the same time, let it soft enough to not press uncomfortably on the fabric and skin, but not so difficult after so many years of practicing. Lan Xichen was always kind (or sensitive) enough to let him know where and how his touches would be better received. The more he continued his careful touch tracing the skin with the tip of his fingers or spreading his palms across the length of his back, the more tiny sounds were fished, the touch bearable enough that the other decided to pick up his brushes and letters again.

Lan Xichen began to blink slowly, falling back to the almost meditative state of writing (at least trades were repetitive enough that he only needed to consult his notes of previous conferences and letters to offer a middle ground with part of the interests of both sects) when he felt two single fingers beginning to circle his lower back, short nails sending a powerful shiver across his spine, making him freeze for a couple of moments before the touch fell into a safer ground. He frowned thoughtfully and finished his last line, movements slower and more attentive. 

Just as he marked the symbol of Gusu Lan on the scroll, closing the correspondence and setting it aside to gather a new one, two pair fingers began walking on his ribs, lightly tracing and scratching their way up and down and-

“A-Yao!” He tittered, putting the new scroll of correspondence to the table quickly as he tumbled away from those playful fingers.

“Er-ge,” his answer was full of such a limpid innocence that it could be read as nothing but mischievousness. “Is my massage not to your liking? I’ve been practicing a new technique.”

Heat grazed Xichen’s face, and he squirmed, those dancing fingers now drawing soft, tiny spirals across his slides, pulling his lips into a flustered smile.

“Later, please, A-Yao.” His voice tilted into a giggly tune, but Xichen was able to stop it, hands flying to hold those smaller, playful ones in (a bit warning) squeeze. “Let me finish this, then you may…” The color spread even more on his cheeks, and he coughed politely. Jin Guangyao chuckled, then squeezed his hand back, in an agreement. 

“I apologize, er-ge. I shall wait to give you your proper and well deserved reward, without any interruptions or worries.” He kissed his nape, letting the words graze his skin for a moment before moving away. Lan Xichen let out an excited breath he didn’t even realized he was holding. 

The next words were sweeter, in a calm and sincere way. “May I keep touching you? No more teasing.”

Lan Xichen felt such a strong wave of fondness and love that it took his everything, every lesson and rule of discipline and self-control for him to calm down, to not throw those papers away and turn around, catching his A-Yao in his arms and kissing him to his hearts’s content. Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath and squeezed those lovely hands one more time, briefly basking in how they fit perfectly into his own, before letting it go, face still warm and a small smile laying in his lips. 

“Please.” He answered.

Hands once more trailed across his back, running up until he could scratch at his nape and calmly undo the braid, combing the long, dark strand with his fingers and taking every single opportunity to pull more and more content sounds. Since they would still have to wait around a shichen, then Jin Guangyao was going to be sure he kept his beloved one happy and relaxed during that time.

[...]

Lan Xichen was expecting something from him.

The exact thing wasn’t yet clear for Meng Yao to be absolutely sure, but there were a few options already spinning in his mind, going from the naive possibility that Lan Xichen was simply suffering human necessity of being constantly touching someone (probably a result from the deprivation of his sect? For the few things the First Jade of Gusu Lan shared about his home and the plentiful rumors Meng Yao heard, the Lan Sect wasn’t painted in the most touch-feeling type) to the gruesome option that Meng Yao offended him somehow so now he was searching for the most vulnerable places on his body to rend him immobile or dead.

Both options were the far ends of a scale, which classified them as the less likely reasonings to explain the new found behavior, but created numerous options in between that could be more likely. Those last days had been spent in excluding all the wrong ones, which brought him to today. 

Lan Xichen was someone who values his own routine and prefers to not bother someone else with most of his affairs, making him an extremely educated and therefore pleasant to talk to and live with, but an equally private one about his life without a proper and careful prying. The change had been happening for a couple of weeks now, which meant it was triggered by a recent event. Whether it was an external or internal one was something he needed to look into more.

Lately, he has been trying to conduct his little experiments as discreetly and secretly as possible. At first, Meng Yao had thought it was simply a new mannerism or tradition from his sect that he finally felt comfortable enough to fall back into, or perhaps a personal way to express gratitude, something he had become bolder to express as they grew inevitably closer and closer together. That was when his insistent, fleeting touches began, looking for relaxed and non-conspicuous moments to get more affectionate, appearing just as constantly as the brush of color on his face every time Meng Yao showed anything close to curiosity at his actions, searching eyes changing to bashful ones.

Therefore, there were two main possibilities to explain what was happening here. And today Meng Yao was going to rule one out.

Sitting in front of Lan Xichen, with his neck bare and curious hands going here and there to explore, he felt a tiny, hesitant line being traced on his head, a bit too close from his ear and yet much away to provoke anything more than a small shiver that he was already prepared for. Instead of reacting, he tilted his head to the side, being able to perfectly see when Lan Xichen quickly pulled his wandering touch away and went immediately back to combing his short hair, which had been receiving too much attention those last days.

“Xichen-ge,” he would rather use the most adequate ‘Lan-zongzhu’ at the moment, but Xichen always looked more subdued after it. Meng Yao continued to refer to him as this, of course, Xichen would need to get used to it soon and it was best to start now with a single person he trusted than to a doubting crowd later, but his objective, right now laid somewhere else. “Is there something bothering you? This one will do his best to fix it and make your stay much more enjoyable.”

Lan Xichen sighed, dropping his comb defeatedly on the desk and finishing his usual ponytail with ease. 

“It’s nothing important, A-Yao. I apologize for worrying you.”

“There is truly no need to apologize,” he smiled, open and encouraging. “No matter what the problem or doubt is, I will be more than happy to help Xichen-ge with it.”

“It’s really a trivial matter.” Lan Xichen watched his face for a few seconds, all while Meng Yao kept it clear and comforting, keeping all the curiosity that was gnawing at his mind hidden. 

Eventually, Lan Xichen’s own curiosity won. 

“That night when you were brushing my hair, you did something and it made…” He stopped, not very sure of which words to choose, brown frowning slightly in a confused manner. “It was like an itch, somehow amusing. It sparked a different feeling and simply got me curious. I tried to replicate it but,” he chuckled lightly. “It seems like I failed in doing so.”

Sudden clarity hit Meng Yao and all the last pieces of the mystery fitted each other perfectly, creating a clear image in his mind. Reasoning #5 was right after all, who would say. 

“I see.” His smile naturally morphed to something more genuine and slightly mischievous. “In that moment, I tickled you by mistake, ge.”

Lan Xichen brightened. “So that was tickling!” Seemingly catching up to his outburst of excitement, a light blush painted his nose, but he continued his joyful demeanor either way. Good. “I have seen so many descriptions of it before that it really got me confused for a while. It explains why I couldn’t do it myself and why I eventually tried it on you, a bit.” The blush increased and Meng Yao controlled the expression on his face to not stare fixedly at it. “I hope I haven’t caused too much trouble and made A-Yao uncomfortable with my approach.”

Meng Yao thought about all the soft touches that kept following him across the house, the tiny embarrassed grins and vehement requests to comb his hair every morning, the steady hold when he stumbled across a poorly performed sword form, a hand on his shoulder or forearm to bring his attention to some matter. His answer came a bit faster than he would’ve liked. “No. Of course there was no inconvenience for me. Even if I would’ve helped to answer your question sooner, this one is very happy to clear your confusion.” He made an educated pause, letting a bit of curiosity slip on his words. “Has Xichen-ge never been tickled before?” 

“Ah, not much, not much.” His eyes turned away from him and Meng Yao could see the half-truth for what it was. “But I’ve always been a bit curious about it. There are plenty of books that had a few snippets, and it always seemed so fun to me!”

Lan Xichen smiled and Meng Yao could see it, how being so open and joyful but still too far away from the other cultivators that no one would dare to reach to him during their own sparks of playfulness. Hasn't his family ever got into a bit of a tickle fight? Of course, Meng Yao wasn’t in a position to wonder about it considering his own history, yet even his childhood had been graced by plenty of memories with his mother that he treasured more than gold. Reminding of happy moments in between dark days, his features softened.

“It can be quite overwhelming,” he explained, “like your body itself is jumping between a strong urge of laughing and running away and even the quickest or lightest touch can leave a residual feeling that will put a smile on your face. There are the ones who like the feeling of it and who don't, but even so there are some who only appreciate when it is done in a certain way or in a specific context.”

Lan Xichen smiled even more brightly at that. “My instincts haven’t failed me yet, then. You’re ticklish too, aren’t you, A-Yao?”

He chuckled at that, becoming more and more endeared by every passing moment. Who would say such a mundane and fleeting thing would be the one to make the First Jade of Gusu Lan so interested and earnest to learn? It was quite precious to have something to teach him as well. 

“I am. Not that it is very easy to catch me off guard. There are plenty of techniques that are more effective than others.” Playfully, he lowered his head and looked at the other coyly. “Perhaps one day I will tell Xichen-ge which, when he decides to share with me his ones.”

“How knowledgeable is A-Yao. Wise and smart, he truly must carry plenty of experience that could help this ignorant one to understand, if he is kind enough to teach me.”

The tune and words were clearly teasing, with a bit of truth bathed in playfulness and excitement of having his discovery to happen and grow like that, but suddenly Meng Yao could see it perfectly: Lan Xichen under him, answering to his every touch, smiling uncontrollably, laughing completely unashamed, loud and bright, capturing the entire light of the sky in his smile, making all kind of sounds that he would have to repeat over and over again until Meng Yao could engrave them fully in his mind, squirming, trashing around and pleading amidst his laughter, face red and teary, wrinkling eyes staring him full of joy and mirth, glimpse of hidden, velvety skin appearing here and there, showing more delightful spots to explore.

What would his uncontrollable laughter sound like? Was Xichen more or less ticklish than him? There was some unexpected spot yet undiscovered that would pry a surprise reaction and a delicious surprised gaze at him? Was he a squirmer, someone who likes to playfully fight or be chased around, or maybe pliant, who would melt under his touches and make the desire to tickle him more increase? Until where could he make his blush go? How many kinds of reactions could Meng Yao pry from him?

Meng Yao felt his throat go dry and the tip of his fingers twitching uncontrollably for a second. Suddenly being under the other’s eager stare was too much and his mind, as always, quickly jumped to save him even before he processed his words thoroughly.

“You should try another experience first, one that is not so overwhelming and that can help you to grow accustomed to the feeling and reactions that tickling can bring, something that will give you more understanding and leverage before being tickled.” Lan Xichen’s gaze was intense and only years of learning to replace his every instinctive reaction to a more controlled façade could help him hide how that expression of utter interest and determination affected him, making color arise at his face. 

“You should tickle me first.”

[...]

“Oh,” Lan Xichen thought as he realized that was the last page he was supposed to be reading, all the necessary letters written and documents approved or denied, which meant that after finishing the last corrections on this teaching plan, all his work would be finally finished. 

Hm. 

“I should’ve thought this better.”

He felt a single snicker bubble on his throat, ignoring it just as he ignored those brown eyes staring at each of his movements avidly, following the marks of his brush with rapid attention. Distractedly, Xichen tried to take a deep breath to regain his control, but had to stop another squirm when Jin Guangyao’s hands got too close from his side once more, making him shiver and straight his posture even more. Just like the few last documents, as soon as the barely there teasing touch got any reactions, it disappeared back to his hair, letting him concentrate once more on the matters at hand.

Jin Guangyao hasn’t gone against his word once during the entire time and, as Lan Xichen was too occupied with his sect’s matters, he kept a series of soothing touches, squeezes and rubs that would keep his muscles nice and relaxed. Unfortunately, the closer he got to the end of his work, the more his mind was haunted by the conversation they held in the beginning of the afternoon, making his thoughts swirl with what was about to happen. The closer he got to the end of the page, the more Jin Guangyao touched him and the more he could feel each one of his senses in fire.

It also didn’t help, as well, that Lan Xichen could feel A-Yao getting closer and closer to him, bodies almost touching, trails of warmth blooming everywhere those fingers grazed him, instincts shouting in alarm anytime those wandering hands did more than hint how easily they could divert their path to his most ticklish spots and at each breath Lan Xichen felt himself get more and more sensitive.

The anticipation was running wild across his meridians, pulling his mind out of the paper and creating a fruitless, and yet amusing, loop where he couldn’t finish his paperwork because if he did he would be tickled, which increased his anticipation because he hadn’t been tickled yet, making him more distracted at his paperwork, which would then bring him back to the beginning and only accomplished in leaving his mind and body restless and with a stubborn tilt upwards in the corner of his lips.

His focus was so out of place that he felt the exact moment those hands moved away from his hair, letting the braid go and disappearing away from his vision and touch. Warning signals exploded in his mind like fireworks, growing more agitated as more and more moments passed with not even the lowest movement happening. Where would the next place those teasing fingers would land? On his lower back, where only a few scribbling would leave him squirming and giggling non-stop? The back of his ribs, where, at any moment he could be turned into a crackling mess by a bit of prodding and drumming on them? The base of his neck, pulling uncontrollable snickers until he was unable to talk normally? Lan Xichen held his breath, body naturally tensing in preparation for the ambush.

He jolted when a firm touch rested on the middle of his back, going up and down into a coaxing rub.

“Is something the matter, er-ge? I may serve as a second opinion for your tribulation, if you wish.” His voice got closer and Lan Xichen knew he was looking above his shoulder, fully aware of how his writing had been stagnant for minutes and what was actually happening. “It must be really complicated, to have you so immersed in it as you’ve been.”

Lan Xichen huffed, answering the teases in kind. “Perhaps it would do me well to get another perspective of this problem. Wouldn’t you be so kind as to switch places with me, my A-Yao? Come sit at my side and let me take care of your hair as you did, as well.”

Jin Guangyao chuckled softly, a false contrite tune in his words. “I couldn’t possibly, er-ge. This one would never dare to imply he could do a better job than Lan-zhongzhu in the matters of Gusu Lan.”

“Then accompany me for a cup of tea?” He gestured to the vacant space at his side, voice persistent and polite. “You know how much I value your brilliant insights and smart remarks for my decisions.”

“Certainly, er-ge is the most kind.” He lowered his head lightly in agreement, “I will be more than happy to share some of our favorite blends as soon as you finish your work.” 

It felt prohibited, how polite their words were and how Jin Guangyao’s fingers trailed across Xichen’s arms, leaving goosebumps wherever it passed. Yet, happiness filled his heart each passing moment, watching fondly as his touch continued until it stopped for a moment on his wrists, tracing the uncovered skin there before following to his hand and then his brush, carefully adjusting it before moving away. 

“It would be improper, otherwise, to interrupt your responsibilities. After it all, however, I want nothing more than to honor your wishes, every single one.”

Lan Xichen felt once more the heat taking over his features, memories upon memories flourishing in his mind. It was a good thing Jin Guangyao couldn’t see his face anymore, otherwise he would witness the way it formed a flustered, tiny pout at his clear defeat. The Lan accepted it gracefully, however, willing his senses to calm themselves once more and focus completely on the last part of the document, finishing the last commentaries and writing his signature, going through the same steps of folding and sealing with the Gusu Lan seal fully automatically, before he put it on his completed pile, a sigh leaving his body at this.

The very first moment he let go of the document, his mind caught up and Lan Xichen froze in the same position, adrenaline running fast across his meridians.

Behind him there was complete silence, hands appeared, and he followed them with the corner of his eyes, struggling to not start chuckling simply by how excited he was, knowing that they could decide to attack any moment now. But they passed his back, torso and curled around his wrists, soft and kind, a taunting and momentarily illusion of peace. Lan Xichen let them pull his arms back to his lap, resting them there.

Slowly, he followed the path from his wrists to his forearms, only fingertips touching the skin in swirling patterns and drawn circles. They stopped by his inner elbow and lightly, so lightly that his nails were barely tracing the spot, tickled it. 

“Er-ge did it all perfectly, of course. I didn’t doubt it a single second.” A-Yao’s voice made him jolt out of the almost hypnotic daze he got into, following every twitch of those quick fingers, enjoying the still too weak instincts of trying to trash away. “You’re so very skilled, so reliable and responsible, but for now, please allow me to take care of everything.” His blush only got worse, both because of the sincere praise and the fact that Jin Guangyao nuzzled softly the ticklish (ticklish, what a delightful word) spot behind his ear, pulling a tiny and surprised squeak before a couple of tiny giggles.

He fumbled over his words, not yet fully accustomed in letting someone else take his role. “A-Yao, maybe I should-”

A kiss hit his ear and a huffed squeal almost escaped, being controlled at the last second when Lan Xichen pushed his face on his own shoulders, which trembled a bit. 

Trust me, Jin Guangyao wanted to say, words almost spilling along his desire in front of the who mattered the most, let me show you how much I know your every weakness, every reaction, every sensitive part of yours, let me show how good I can take care of all of them. Let me bring you everything you are looking for, all the joy, all the happiness, all the delight, let me pry each one of them from you and lay it all in your hands. Lay all of yourself in my hands. Let me, let me, let me. 

What he said, instead, was: “There is no need, er-ge, I am sure of I want to do. There would be no great honor.” 

How could it be a burden when all my thoughts are you and you and you. “But what about you? Are you sure, er-ge?”

His hands stopped and he adjusted his head to watch the other better when silence began spreading after his question. 

“Please.” He let the word escape, filling the silence for a second.

Was he wrong, after all? But that couldn’t be, he noticed every positive response to his touches, every rewarding sound, the way after the initial instinct of moving away, Lan Xichen went back to press himself once more in his hands, how swiftly the work flooded, how closed lipped smiles kept blooming in his mouth. Could it be that not being able to see his expression as freely as before clouded his interpretations so much?

Lan Xichen’s words cut his line of thought before he could start to backtrack. 

“Only if my A-Yao gives me the happiness of being called Huan-ge, for at least the end of this day?” His voice was playful and his eyes twinkled when they turned around to look at him. Jin Guangyao was helpless for the fond chuckle that escaped him. It was much better than choking in surprise.

Lan Xichen. Lan Huan. Huan-ge. To be allowed to call him by his birth name… Jin Guangyao truly couldn’t be more blessed.

I could call you that for the end of my life.

He lowered his voice and got closer once more, hands going back to the soft scribbles on his inner elbows, slowly going upwards in fleeting touches. In a purr, the advisor replied.

“Anything my Huan-ge wants.”

Even if the offer was his, wide, surprised eyes still found the other’s gaze, blush growing stronger before Lan Xichen quickly turned around, mind still spinning with Huan-ge, Huan-ge, Huan-ge over and over again, only distracted when his hands migrated to his shoulders, going way too close to his horribly ticklish neck. A tittering puff jumped away from his mouth and his shoulders trembled as he willed them to stay down. The hands continued to approach before closing on the hem of his robes, playing with them in between his fingers.

“May I?” 

Realizing what that meant, Lan Xichen melted a bit and only the adrenaline and anticipation kept his muscles from falling on those kind arms. 

“You may.”

Jin Guangyao hummed pleased and began taking off his outer robe carefully, treating the fabric with much more care than Lan Xichen who, much for his demise, was still very bad at washing the delicate fabric without tearing it apart.

He removed the first one, taking off his stash, folding it and putting both on his table. He repeated the gesture, tapping his fingers on the hem of his second, then third robes, always asking and waiting for his answer before he continued. When he was left with his two last robes, Jin Guangyao scribbled lightly at his side, seemingly satisfied at his louder and surprised giggles as an answer and then positioning his hands on his lower back.

Lan Xichen grabbed them and, quietly, guided both to the hem of his robe. “You may. Please.”

Jin Guangyao barely hesitated before removing it too, just as reverently as before and Lan Xichen smiled, patting the last, thin and comfortable, inner robe with satisfaction. It felt much lighter and adequate, completely different from greeting someone so important as his A-Yao with the condecorations of a sect leader. Now he was simply Lan Xichen, Lan Huan, enjoying the surprise Jin Guangyao so mindfully prepared for him.

The Jin grabbed Xichen’s skilled hands once more and pulled them upwards, crossing them behind his neck, making them both get even closer than before. Xichen took the opportunity to kiss his cheek, his ear, his neck and shoulder in appreciation, more than happy at the bold move. 

For his last preparation, he slowly began undoing the knot tying his forehead ribbon, eyes focused and attentive to any slight show of discomfort, eventually pulling it carefully, folding and laying reverently above all his clothes.

“Let me look after you.”

His hands rested on his waist, first only caressing the skin, testing the pressure they would have to apply to tickle the spot, then changing to a soft spidering that started from his sides to the base of his spine, scrapping and prodding at them with quick, fleeting touches that started to bring more and more giggling, dancing on both spots over and over again, leaving his nerves prickling with every teasing tickle. His touch danced across the skin, tracing the line of the waistband of his pants, slipping a couple of fingers under his robe to pinch lightly at his sides, going up and down a few times until his giggles increased to a higher giggles, once or two squeals escaping here and there, especially as he went back to his spine, prodding and poking the bones as he went upwards.

The more the playful touches continued, the more Lan Xichen felt his control crumbling, his reactions slipping easily, delighted noises filling the room as the soft, light and fast tickling just continues, exploring his back with scratches and scribblings that only made him feel more and more ticklish at each moment, each touch teasing just enough to sent his senses into wildness. Every time those dancing fingers followed each bone of his ribs with fluttering and a light clawing, drummed quickly in between them, attacked the lowest parts of his shoulder blades with spidering and pokes, Lan Xichen tried to curl more and more forward only to remember about his position and laugh more. Louder snickers, painted sometimes by surprised crackles, escaped him in waves, arms trembling to not lower themselves, doing the best to keep his torso unprotected. Even the praising, grateful kisses that Jin Guangyao gave his biceps and forearms in appreciation felt like tiny sparks to ticklishness at this point. 

As more and more moments passed and those maddening fluttering and sparsely rough tickling continued, his previous muffled squeaks turned into louder yelps and tittering giggles transformed in an unending onslaught of squealing snickers. Each sound grew more uncontrollable and unstoppable as Jin Guangyao calmly guided his efforts to his armpits, the fingers that were previously attacking every inch of his shoulder blades then walking in tiny pokes and swirls to the spot. Lan Xichen closed his eyes firmly, a giant, wobbly smile in his face as he squirmed the entire way, yelping and chuckling when they finally arrived at their destiny.

His fingers rested on the skin, drawing circles and scribbling softly on the place where his back connected to his armpit, slowly worming their way to tickle it before Lan Xichen couldn’t take it anymore and firmly clamped his arms on his sides, successfully blocking the way, shoulders bouncing with his laughter painted in a mix of excitement and fear.

The shorter one clicked his tongue, but moved his fingers away, nevertheless. It didn’t take long for his velvet tune to find its way to his sensitive ears once more. 

“Huan-gege’s laughter is truly a blessing.” Lan Xichen shook his head, and he nibbled that spot behind his ear in reply, pulling a squeal, giggling and giggling non-stop. “Even if he keeps running from my care. There is no worry, however, I will keep bringing him back as much as we need to, again and again.” 

Finishing with a peck that resulted in even more snickering, Lan Xichen finally realized the distraction for what it was, immediately arching his back the moment his hands began clawing at the tickle spot right under his shoulder blades, pulling an undignified squawk and a stumble that made him tilt and fall on Guangyao’s chest. Warmth involved him from every side, which did nothing to placate the ticklish tingling sensation spreading to his ribs in an unrelenting attack, uncontrollable laughter spilling freely from his lips until he felt a hand on his face, turning it to the side to find those warm brown eyes staring right at him.

“My, my, what a pleasant surprise to find you here, Huan-ge.” 

His thumb began brushing his cheek softly and Lan Xichen guffawed, almost completely lost in the sensation, face and ears hot at the smug shine in the other’s eyes. After discovering that even his cheeks were ticklish, A-Yao always took an opportunity to tease them with fluttering tickles and playful words.

“Nohohot so much of a surprihihise, I belieheve.” He grinned, the mischievousness of it losing partially its sharpness by the utter adoring expression on his face. “I am ahahalways lookihing fohor you, after-aha-all!”

The fingers traced his cheek once more, then moved to his mouth, pressing across his lower lip for a moment. Lan Xichen nipped it and then looked at Jin Guangyao with big eyes, batting his eyelashes. The other huffed. 

“So smooth, Huan-ge.” Still, he acquiesced with the silent wish, not wanting to refuse his dear one anything on this day. He laid a peck on his mouth and moved away before Xichen could try to convince him to change his current plan to different activities.

At the pout he received for that, Jin Guangyao let his hand scribble and tease softly his other (adorably, lovely, addictingly) ticklish cheek, immediately changing it to a wobbly, tiny closed lipped grin. Jin Guangyao hummed, laying more and more fast kisses on his mouth until it opened again into a happy smile and bubbly giggles fell from it freely. 

His fingertips continued to tickle his cheek for a few more moments before it started heading down to his next target, crawling and poking until it arrived to that truly delightful spot under his jaw, lightly scratching on it over and over again, making Lan Xichen’s giggles rise to an uncontrollable chuckling laughter, painted with squeals and snorts as those tickles danced around the spot, his body trembling with the urge to trash and squirm away from the maddening touches.

Jin Guangyao twirled and explored every inch of ticklish skin, sometimes venturing further down his neck, spidering the middle and scribbling his collarbones before immediately going back to torment the previous, truly delicious, spot.

Delicious…

Hm.

Lan Xichen barely paid attention when A-Yao tilted his head closer, using his entire concentration to stop himself from scrunching up his neck and locking his hands and their horrible tickles on the place that made his snickers go higher and squeaky, pulling one high pitched sound after the other, refusing to let his laughter slow down even for a moment. It was only when his chin was held carefully up and a warm breath hit his bare neck that his mind caught up with his partners’ plan, leaving no time to react before his face was burrowed on his skin and those lips began nibbling under his jaw.

A loud shriek filled the room as he instinctively pried himself away from his embrace, laughing and squirming so much he eventually fell forwards, forehead rested on the tabletop as a snorting kind of laughter continued to escape him, only slowing down to a unstoppable giggling at the ghost tickles. Rubbing his neck, he tried to rub the feeling away and realizing with anticipation how this new position left him with his entire back open. More and more titters fell from his lips.

“Huan-ge, you fell.” Jin Guangyao purred, staying in the same place as he watched him with smart and crinkling eyes until Lan Xichen returned his gaze, face bright and a smile spread from one ear to another. He grinned and controlled the urge to attack him again, to turn Xichen around, hold his arms away and once more find his way to the most delicious spots and torment him, pulling joyous laughter again and again and-

He didn’t, of course. It was not the moment yet. For now, all the Lan needed was a little more of building up and tormenting tickles, until the slightest brush of fingertips would leave him drunk in happiness and snickers. 

His foolish urges would have to wait for their moment and keep following the plan.

“Why don’t you come back up, hm?” 

Xichen’s eyes followed to his open arms, fingers wiggling slightly, not even pretending to hide what would come of his fate would he choose to come back to his embrace. He could feel his face burn even more, heat escaping to his neck and ears. His lover had a look on his face that brought goosebumps to his spine, a kind of shine that said that he would patiently wait until the second Lan Xichen decided to continue their playful moment. 

“A-Yao,” there was a hint of a whine at the end of his words. Jin Guangyao clicked his tongue and cooed in exaggerated empathy, as if his hands were tied and there was nothing he could do to save him from his current predicament. “Nohoho…”

“Won’t you come back to me, Huan-ge?” He pouted, looking down and away. “Tell me, does this one’s touch displease you? For you to try to get away from me so determinately, I can only imagine how my advances are not welcome.”

Lan Xichen huffed and groaned softly, recognizing the clear provocation for what it was. “A-Yao, my love, please…”

“A single moment without the presence of my Huan-ge and the cold is too great to survive.” He continued, tone pitiful and sad. “But, if this one truly wronged his Lan Huan so greatly, it must only be fair to endure it.”

Lan Xichen was a weak, weak man, and so he huffed and whined in protest, but straightened up and went back to his previous position, snuggled once more in the most trustful arms in the world, hiding his face in his own hands, his back shaking the tiniest bit with the chuckling, pleased laughter from the other he received in reward.

Every point of contact set his senses at fire and every breath he took in silence, slightly shuddering, was filled with the anticipation of his new attack, his nerves tingling in preparation and expression already losing itself to an uncontrollable kind of giggles that kept jumping joyfully on his throat. 

A couple of seconds, then a pair of minutes passed and nothing happened.

Lan Xichen slowly lowered his hands, just enough to see those offending, wiggling fingers clawing the air, close, yet too far away to even touch skin. The unexpected scene was enough to make him jump and squirm, almost falling into those tickling touches, but managing to stop himself once more, snickering at his own silliness.

“No, no, wait, A-Yao! Wait!”

Jin Guangyao nuzzled behind his ear in answer and his laughter only worsened, even if there was yet no tickles teasing his spots, reactions fueled by nothing more than the adrenaline that made those tiny, ticklish sparks spread from everywhere Jin Guangyao touched or would (probably) touch any moment now. When he decided to move those offending wiggly fingers, possibly. 

Lan Xichen pouted, turning around just the necessary amount for him to see it, receiving a placating kiss and even more nuzzles on his neck as consolation.

“Oh no,” Jin Guangyao gasped theatrically, which only made Lan Xichen let out another complaining noise, still surrounded by plenty of giggles, and bat one of his hands lightly away. “It seems like my Huan-ge is so far away! Too far from my caring touch. What shall I do now?”

“Just dohoho it, A-Yao, pleaahase. Have mehehercy, have mercy on yohour poor Xichen.”

“I would love to help, Huan-ge, but that simply seems impossible, with you being so far away. If only there was someone who could guide my hands to a kinder destination…”

“There is nohot!”

“There is not? Oh, that is truly a pity.” He nosed the spot once more, prying higher giggles. Angling his mouth better, then, Jin Guangyao made sure to whisper the next words directly into his ear. “I would be so happy to find, tease and tickle any and every spot that my Huan-gege would be kind enough to guide me. Anywhere he wants, any spot that would leave him relaxed, content and laughing his heart out and I would stay there, tickling and tickling again and again for as long as you want. Doesn't this sound like a nice offer?”

Lan Xichen snorted, tittering while turning his face away, burning in a newer shade of blush at such lovely teases. He was plenty aware, after everything they had passed together, that there was no escape from his current indecision. Jin Guangyao would keep his sweet words and provocations for hours at end until he caved and decided the next target to his doom, both to his absolute delight and despair. Still, he turned around with a new protesting, sad noise, making Jin Guangyao’s lip twitch upwards before an expression of pure innocence took over his face and he pecked lightly his mouth.

“Won’t you let me, Huan-ge?” Each word was marked by another kiss, on his lips, his cheek, his eyelid, everywhere. Lan Xichen hummed pleased, melting more in the embrace, realizing one of the many benefits of staying right where he was. “Won’t you show me where you want me to tickle you next?”

It took a bit more of distraction, more lingering kisses and sweet provocations, until two strong, yet so delicate, hands gripped his wrists and guided his own to an open neck. Jin Guangyao smiled and kissed his temple in gratefulness, more than happy at the happy snickering he received.

Slowly, his hands moved to rest on his shoulders, thumbs rubbing teasingly the skin, so close to the base of his neck that Lan Xichen could already feel the uncontrollable smile taking over the expression of his face. Even before the hands started creeping closer, his laughing fit was already back, yelps and squeaks going louder and quicker as his hands began spidering across his neck.

“Ahahahaha-Yahahao! Mehehercy! M-mer-r-cihihiHIHIHI!

Jin Guangyao gave a small nibble on his neck, humming in satisfaction at the screech, taking his time to trace with his lips across every little spot, to huff and puff his breath over the sensitive skin and tease with a light, barely there, scrape of teeth every little mole or scar he found in his way, only to go back to nibbling and huffing, changing the tune of the laughter at every little change, making uncontrollable and loud giggles morphing into wheezing crackles, then bringing back to louder titters and start the cycle again.

“So kind of my Huan-ge to let this one be deserving of his laughter, for returning so wingilly to my hug and following so perfectly my instructions, for trusting me like this.” He nuzzled him, pulling a higher joyous squeal before finally giving Lan Xichen his well deserved prize. 

He took a deep breath and burrowed his face in his neck with a giant raspberry.

“AHAHAHA-YAHAHAO!”

Jin Guangyao hummed in question, being sure the vibrations hit the skin and resulted in more guffaws and crackling as an answer. Positioning his fingers once more, he began alternating between scratching and scribbling across his collarbone and fluttering and tracing behind his ears, making his laughter ring loud and free in the air, screeches and wheezes following it happily. Lan Xichen threw his head back, only opening even more space for his raspberries, an advantage that Jin Guangyao was more than glad to use.

After a few moments, he let his tickling slow down enough to a soft spidering, tiny pecks now trailing to the back of his ears, pulling squeak after squeak, making Lan Xichen melt even more on him, words forming and disappearing on the tip of his tongue with the sudden onslaught of affection. Eventually, his hands stopped.

“Please, allow me, then, to clarify a few important points, while we explore new spots at our convenience.”

Lan Xichen was just recovering from his laughing fit when the hands disappeared for a moment and quickly appeared back again on his ribs, mischievous fingers twitching lightly on the spot. The Sect Leader snorted, holding on the other’s arms and looking up, finding his fond gaze, unmoved by his own wide and shiny eyes filled with surprise. Pleas began spilling from him. 

“My A-Yao! Plehehehease, wait! There is noho nee-eek!”

Jin Guangyao drummed on the spot, hands clawing determinately on each space in between the bones and incessant fingers prodding each one of his ribs, pressing on each one of them and vibrating in short bursts of attacks, spreading ticklish sparkles across his every single sense, making the poor sensitive Lan throw his head back with a crackling laughter, thrashing around in the hold.

“Let us start then.” 

No matter how much Lan Xichen shook or moved his head, he couldn’t stop those whispering words to attack directly his sensitive ears, adding a squeaking tilt to his chortles and a bit more of maddening to his mind.

“My Huan-er-ge is the most hardworking, determined and brilliant person I’ve ever met.” Lan Xichen shrieked and before he could oppose anything Jin Guangyao was saying (by a simple confusion, of course) he felt the other’s hands slip and dig on that absurdly ticklish spot right in the bottom of his ribs, almost in his back, making him lose all his words and arch back with a loud crackle. A truly unfortunate event. 

“Your spirit was strong enough to keep both of our hopes alive during the war and then to keep your resilience unwavering even during the fall out of it. Your resolution in what you believe and your kindness that forgives and love so easily form such an esteemed and important partnership that it amazes me until this very day, and will continue to do so for much longer. The first makes you understand the most subtle and important details of political affairs and crucial battles, while the latter keeps you-” (vulnerable, weak, transparent, he didn’t say) “trustworthy and human enough to lead, help and spare the most that you can.”

“You care so much for the ones who are dear to you and work the most to maintain and protect everything that you believe.” At this point, his words had lost all the teasing mischievousness to adoration, a reverence that he could only demonstrate fully when they were soft and unguarded like this. Jin Guangyao began slowing down his attack, changing to spidering tickles that ran up and down his ribs, slipping away momentarily to his armpits and drumming there from time to time, when Lan Xichen tried to interrupt his vulnerable words and then rewarded him with cute snorts and giggly squeaks. 

His voice got even more gentle. “I wish you would let those you love-” (me, me, me) “take care and carry your burdens along with you as well. We would be so happy to do so, as much as you need, for as long as you need.”

Lan Xichen had trashed so much he had lowered himself even more on his embrace, disarranging his robes open, which created the perfect opportunity for the Jin to grin and worm his hands to skitter and pinch the ticklish skin of his sides, pulling surprised, ticklish laughter. 

“A-Yao!” Looking down, all he could find was Xichen’s determined stare, watching him amidst the misty shine of tears that began collecting on the corner of his eyes. “Yohohohou alreadyihihihi do thahaAHAHAT!” Even as the tickling increased in protest, his words persisted. Amidst the crackling and snorts, they aimed directly to his heart. “Tahahahaking sohoHOHO - NOHOHOT THEHEHERE! - MUCH CAHAHARE OHOHO-ohof me! Yohohou d-d-dohohoho it all so eek! SohoHOHO FREHEHELY!”

And Jin Guangyao was weak. So incredibly and helplessly weak and weak and weak. 

His body moved on his own before his mind could fully catch up with it, thoughts running too fast for him to get a strong hold on each of them. He lowered the taller one on the ground, digging his fingers on the soft flesh of his sides until he was laying on the ground and he could maneuver himself to sit on his thighs. In his new position he could see the exact moment Xichen’s face dissolved into that expression full of surprise, fear and delight as he pushed his robes to the side until his stomach was completely bare and he suddenly burrowed his face on his belly.

“MYIHIHIHI LOHOHOVE!”

His hands drilled on his sides, squeezing and drumming, running up to claw at his ribs, then inwards to knead at the corners of his stomach. Each new touch and tickle made the other shriek, loud, belly and mirthful laughter painted in wheezing screeches and snorts, filling the entire room with the force of it and making the other arch, which only burrowed him closer and closer to the playful attention. Jin Guangyao nibbled each weak spot he could find, blowing raspberries directly on his belly button, pressing kisses and whispered loving, praising words on his lower belly, following his waist with nibbles, nipping the sensitive places of his hips, raspberrying the trembling spot non stop. 

After lavishing every single inch with all the nibbles, kisses and raspberries he could deliver, Jin Guangyao started to ascend. His hands slowed down their tickles, changing to a scribbling and spidering kind of touch that started on his lower belly, tracing the line of his waist, the bones of his hips, before climbing slowly up.

“So precious.”

He kissed a trail on his chest, completely unfazed by how it trembled and shook under him with all the maddened snickers that continued to spill.

“So strong.”

Lan Xichen hugged himself, hiding his face on his shoulder while the light tickles kept his nerves aflame. Tiny squeaks and high pitched sounds continued to escape him, growing quicker and more uncontrollable the more Jin Guangyao got closer to his target. 

“So responsive.”

His hands slipped to land a quick squeeze on his inner thighs, immediately making him squirm from one side to another.

He kissed the spot right below his collarbone. Then waited.

Lan Xichen snickered and giggled and wiggled around, smile growing bigger and wobblier the more moments passed without another whispered, sweet word from the other nor a kiss that made his muscles be torn between melting into the touch or escaping away from all the tickles. His hands were now resting on his waist, keeping it nice and snug in his hold, preventing it from squirming away from their inevitable fate. 

Jin Guangyao watched his every expression, every twitch and giggle avidly, making the heat consuming his face spread to his chest and his eyes to shut even more tightly, plenty aware of the kind of gaze they would find as soon as he reciprocated it.

Except for his increasing titters, nothing else took over the air around them. After minutes passed without anything more, Lan Xichen huffed and opened his eyes, finding that adoring, reverent, hungry gaze watching his every expression, a fond grin turning into an evil smirk that made goosebumps run across his spine and his snickering to increase.

Slowly, without any hurry or worry in the world, Jin Guangyao began lowering his head, eyes fixated on him.

“A-Yao!!” His squirms failed to escape his tight grip, which was not helped for the way all his muscles felt like wet wool. “Please! Plehehease, anythihihing else!”

“So sensitive. So ticklish for me.” Jin Guangyao continued, a low, pleased tune taking over his words when the mirth shining on Xichen’s eyes and the excited squirming only increased at the teases. 

His mouth brushed his neck, next word hitting his skin into a mix of airy tickles and a spark of electricity.

“Perfect.”

Before Lan Xichen could protest anymore, a gigantic raspberry hit his neck, the vibrations leading to another shriek and louder laughter, a high crackling one that left his entire body shaking from the force of it, his head thrown back as squeals, screeches and chortles escaped merrily from his lips. Jin Guangyao followed his every squirm and movement, his hands spidering up and digging on his armpits, drumming on the spots as mercilessly as the raspberries continued to torment his every nerve, intertwined by nibbles and nips that would be prying squeaks and snorts from his lungs. 

Not a trace of his torso was forgotten. Tiny raspberries rested at the crook of his neck, nibbles attacked every spot from under his chin to his jaw, and fingers danced across his armpits, scratched at his ribs, pinched his sides and drummed on his hips, spot that suddenly would be graced with one or two raspberries to tint his reactions in surprise. Not even his thighs, which were graced with so many squeezes and kneading that made him kick and try to roll around fruitlessly, weren’t spared from the onslaught of tickles, each touch teasing his most weak and sensitive spots to latch on and torment without a mercy.

Lan Xichen laughed. He pleaded, snickered and crackled without a single thought nor coherence, mind too much taken over by the overwhelming sensations, by the feeling of joy and happiness that filled his chest like nothing else mattered, by the ticklish tingles and vibrations that teased his every nerve, that danced across his mind and at which he couldn’t ever look away. For a moment, no worries from his position, no exhaustion from his work or fears of the future existed. There was only Jin Guangyao and his perfect, merciless tickles, his unending laughter and warmth all around. 

Before it got too much, Jin Guangyao stopped, being intrinsically aware of Xichen’s every quirk and tell. The Jin laid a last kiss on his neck, chuckled at the tiny wiggle it pulled and then moved closer to his face, his smaller hands cupping it and wiping the few tears away with such a care that it was as if he was handling the most precious treasure of all the cultivation world in his palms.

They spend all the while his remaining snickers filled the air like that. 

“It’s so dark and cold outside.” Lan Xichen said, when his voice was back and he could say more than one syllable without remembering what happened and falling once more in titters. He pulled the other closer. “Wouldn’t my A-Yao be kind enough to let this one stay for the night?”

Jin Guangyao huffed, amused. 

(As if he wouldn’t let him stay for the rest of their lives.)

“Of course. Such an esteemed guest of the Jintali Sect deserves only the utmost hospitality from this lowly advisor.” He laid a kiss on his forehead, right where his forehead ribbon would be and Lan Xichen hummed happily. “After all, what would say the rumors after seeing Sect Leader Lan getting out of my room in such a disheveled state in the middle of the night?”

Lan Xichen replied with a peck on his cheek and a playful light pinch on his side. “Nothing worse than they will speculate tomorrow, surely,  after discovering I spent the night with you.”

“Then I will take care of them accordingly.”

Lan Xichen turned his face around, kissing his palm in a quick distraction moving before he was worming a couple of fingers mischievously once more on Jin Guangyao’s side, making him get out from his place on top of him and move away enough for them to get up.

Amidst the playful remarks and softer words, both of them prepared themselves for the night, eventually slipping on the bed together. As soon as Lan Xichen snuggled on his embrace, happily burrowing his face on his chest and pulling Jin Guangyao even closer, he could already feel the sleepiness start to drag his eyes closed.

A hand deliberately rested in between his shoulder blades and Lan Xichen hummed in question, feeling a pleasant shiver when the fingers began softly tracing the spot. 

“May I?” Jin Guangyao whispered.

Lan Xichen smiled and sighed, content, fulfilled, happy. He nuzzled the chest under him, laying a peck on his shoulder.

“You may.”

His other hand tangled on his hair and began scratching his scalp, a thankful kiss being delivered on top of his head. 

The low, whispered words that filled the air no longer carried a teasing tune, but a quiet vulnerability and adoration that shone in each letter. 

“There is no bigger honor in the world than to be allowed to have you in my arms, er-ge. to be granted the opportunity to take care of you, to pick each one of your reactions and vulnerabilities and then pick you carefully apart so I can give each little piece the attention it deserves and rearrange them all together.”

His hand began drawing tiny circles across each one of his shoulder blades, a single finger teasing momentarily the awfully ticklish spot under them before dancing away to a safer ground. Quick puffs of titters escaped from Lan Xichen, who only melted even further on him, the touch soft enough to slowly lull him to sleep, words forming and disappearing on the tip of his tongue at the affection. 

“When you let me explore and find every single one of your tickle spots, to discover your most favorite teases and let me use them on you over and over and over again.” A finger worms its way to scribble across his collarbone, another hand goes up and traces the outer shell and behind his ear with the softest tickles, making his smile and let out a single giggle. “Every time you give me all your weakness, your trust, your smile, your reactions so willingly, without a second thought, I want to give you in return all my heart, all my reverence and attention until I can make you the most happy, content, relaxed, joyful you can be.”

Lan Xichen titters and hugs the other firmly, the giddiness spilling from his heart to his actions, making him lay soft kisses everywhere they could reach, getting slower and slower as the tiredness begins to take over. 

Now the tickling was nothing more than a soft rubbing, a hint to make him a huff a laughter here and there at most, focusing primarily on making him floaty and relaxed enough for his consciousness to begin to slip away, in the rhythm those fingers tapped the back of his neck and scratched at his scalp.

“Thank you, truly, for letting me share this special moment with you, for trusting me, for this, for everything, for you. There is nothing in this world that could make me any happier than to do this with you for everyday of our lives. I will carry every single of your burdens and burn all the obstacles away if this means having you by my side for as long as I can, for as long as you will have me, Huan-ge.”

“A-Yao,” Lan Xichen whispered, clearly losing more and more his battle against sleep, voice slurred. “My A-Yao, don’t forget,” he mumbled and sighed happily, making Jin Guangyao’s heart dance in reply. “I love you too.”

The Jin closed his lips tightly, in order to control the choked noise that almost escaped him, eyes closed firmly as he pressed his lips reverently on Lan Xichen’s forehead. The other was fast asleep, already, and Jin Guangyao chuckled softly and emotionally in the darkness of the night, where no one could see his expression, glad that this part of his soul could be so easily read by the one who mattered the most.

He didn’t say it out loud, of course. And maybe one day Lan Xichen would say this sober and awake and then Jin Guangyao would find the courage to answer him in kind. But for now he let the other sleep soundly and he followed his example quickly. 

But since he was a weak, truly weak man, Jin Guangyao, Meng Yao, mouthed the words on his forehead anyway.

I love you.

[~*~]

Fun Facts and Extra Things!

Me: Hey time to write Meng Yao :D

*adds guilt, distrust, self issues, paranoia and hunger for (safety, peace, importance) blood and LAN XICHEN/ER-GE being shouted internally in love 99% of the time*

Me: Yeah my work here is done. Nailed it.

Lan Xichen being tickled: Noooo, I am simply a little, poor meow meow, won’t you spare me?

Jin Guangyao, THE poorest, littlest meow meow to ever exist: I’m about to destroy this man's whole career.

I almost added like Meng Yao inheriting a fancy and beautiful comb from his mother that he never used before but decided to use in the moment he was caring for Xichen’s hair but the scene of him daydreaming about the life he would have when he was accepted as Sect Leader’s son and all he could offer Lan Xichen after this was stronger to me.

Created an entire lore about Meng Shi in my mind only to realize it was like I wrote an entire AU of Apothecary diaries story rip. Got me thinking about Meng Yao being Maomao uncovering mysteries in the palace with his brilliant mind and Xichen being the eunuch with a dick that catches on to his plans. Anyway peace and love on planet earth. Rip Meng Shi tho she would be even more fckeeed. 

Thinking forever about the implications of a world where Jin Guangyao is accepted and safe at the Koi Tower, when Jin Zixuan is the Sect Leader and so the Jin Sect doesn’t have only Jin Guangyao to relay in. I think that would allow him to come closer to Lan Xichen one day. Maybe he would realize that an advisor is not fully essential to stop the sect from crumbling and breaking apart, perhaps he would look at Jin Ling, growing stronger and healthy and spoiler but caring by the day and would then look at Lan Xichen and would desire. Maybe they could live in a nice, quiet place of Cloud Recesses, when one of the Lan juniors grew enough to inherit the title of a leader.

Meng Yao, upon living with Lan Xichen during three days: Well, even a complete uneducated and socially blind MORON can see that those forehead ribbons are extremely important to the Lans, even if I can’t exactly point how profound that sentiment is, I am still fully aware of it. (Ends up discovering how sacred the forehead ribbon is, what it means and then proceeds to wait YEARS until getting express permission to touch it)

Wei Wuxian after knowing and interacting with Lan Zhan for more than one year: Hey wonder what that piece of fabric in their head is for. Well, since it’s crooked I think I am just going to pull it out and fix it :)) HEY LAN ZHAN!!

Pls imagine that every tickle fic I write with everyone in mdzs being happy is because Jin Guangyao killed his father first thing first and so nothing bad ever happened.

I honestly have no concrete idea for this AU, here Jin Zixuan planned a revolution against his father, taking over and stopping their support to the Wen Sect, which lowered significantly their income and so they fell fastly first. Zixuan was not very interested in going after the power and cultivation Wei Wuxian and Wen Ruhoan had, so even if the Jin Sect still held the war prisoners, he vouched (after Yanlin’s opinion ofc) in letting Wen Qing and the Daifu Wen branch take over the leadership, with plenty of sanactions, which didn’t force Wei Wuxian to turn his back to the Yunmeng Sect and escape to the Burial Mounds, nor expose himself even more to the demonic cultivation and so doesn’t collapse as quickly as before. He and Lan Zhan talked more, with the later visiting Lotus Pier and both of them visiting Wen Yuan frequently. 

The relationship between Nie Mingjue and Jin Guangyao is still delicate but not mortal. Jin Guangyao still has plans to take over the leadership of the sect one day… he just keeps pushing ‘that day’ more and more forward. I still believe Yanli’s death on the canon was a casualty of his choices and that he didn’t really planned it and I like to imagine that being so well treated by her, so very different of how the previous Madam Jin did, together of him not being the leader would actually help a bit to heal that deep yearning of having power to survive. 

The first time he saw Yanli actually fighting for him and against the rumors would seal this (come on let’s be honest here, she has years training how to push brothers together). Eventually Lan Xichen starts to court him and Jin Guangyao convinces himself that being the spouse of a sect leader will bring him the power he wants much more conveniently than killing everyone to the top himself. The biggest problem is that, if needed, he wouldn’t be able to kill Lan Xichen to protect himself. So I let to your imagination if he accepts or not the proposal :D yipeee

The “difficult” times that led him to lose control and kiss Lan Xichen for the first time was that they fled briefly to reunite more small sects and roge cultivators to rise against the Wen, but they kept stumbling on Wen patrols repeatedly on the worst moments, which resulted in them escaping to a safer ground under the most awkward situations. He saw Lan Xichen naked way too frequently and had to share small, tight hiding spots and beds with him. Da boi was STRUGGLING

I think that actually Jin Guangyao is v neutral here about tickling but upon discovering that Lan Xichen loves it he simply does all the studies and research about it and takes upon himself to be the best at it. His er-ge truly deserves nothing but the best

Lan Xichen living under the precepts and rules of not being Greedy and Showing of How Rich You Are so he is used to using cheaper and simpler products all while Meng Yao is: If I don’t offer that man all the BEST the market has to offer He Will Die

[squeaky-n-blushy]

Today the wheel has chosen: 83. "I didn't think you had it in you." And to go with this prompt I've picked Ler!Zhuo Yichen and Lee!Zhao Yuanzhou/Zhu Yan from Fangs of Fortune. Set during episode 14, between the sword dance scene and the Chongwu spy scene.

• Around 1.400 words

"Xiao Zhuo-daren, I didn't think you had it in you."

Zhuo Yichen turned at that smooth and annoying voice, his brows furrowing as he watched Zhao Yuanzhou saunter in his direction, promptly sitting by his side on the short stairs before Zhuo Yichen could even think of getting up. A small smile graced Zhao Yuanzhou's face, his eyes twinkling with amusement that never meant anything good for the younger man.

He eyed the White Ape Demon warily. "What?"

"I didn't think you really could sword dance that well." Zhao Yuanzhou leaned to the side to bump their shoulders together. Zhuo Yichen instantly scooted farther from the demon, a grave expression set on his semblance. Zhao Yuanzhou glanced away with a look that would have been called embarrassment were it on anyone else's face but his. "You don't look like someone who'd enjoy that sort of thing."

The demon hunter bristled at the audacity. For someone who bullshitted around thinking he was so charming and charismatic, Zhao Yuanzhou sure wasn't great at not getting into people's nerves. Especially his.

He glared up at Zhao Yuanzhou, his voice just on the edge of freezing. "You don't know me, you don't get to say what I do and don't enjoy."

Zhao Yuanzhou raised both eyebrows like he was deeply surprised by his snark, raising both hands in playful surrender. "All I'm saying is I didn't think you'd want to spend your time on fun things. Our Xiao Zhuo-daren is a very no-nonsense person." He gave the swordsman a once-over, far too leisurely and appreciatively for Zhuo Yichen's liking, who felt a faint dusting of pink rising to his cheeks in what was surely outrage. "With a face that serious one would think you haven't played around a day in your life. If Xiao Jiu and Ying Lei rope you into one of their games will you know how to do anything other than standing there awkwardly?"

Said serious face contorted in annoyance, yet something within him twisted with genuine hurt. The Great Demon couldn't have known of his lonely childhood, of how he spent his early years and adolescence relying only on his family and on a tree that couldn't talk back for having his social needs somewhat fulfilled to the point he could trick himself into thinking he needed nothing more. The comment wasn't meant to wound, of this Zhuo Yichen was aware. Even so, Zhao Yuanzhou, Zhu Yan, of all people, had no right to judge him. "I know games."

The other man nodded very, excruciatingly slowly, as if believing Zhuo Yichen's words took every bit of his conscious effort. When his lips quirked up upon watching Zhuo Yichen's glare strengthen, he gave up on the farce entirely. "You'll have to agree it's hard to believe it when you say it like that."

His hand flew threateningly to the hilt of the Cloud Light Sword, already glowing brightly. "You won't be believing anything when you're speared on my sword!"

Not only did Zhao Yuanzhou not express any apprehension, as was usual, Zhuo Yichen saw the exact moment in which humor built up in Zhao Yuanzhou's eyes and the demon clenched his lips to keep from laughing.

He-!

"You-!" Zhuo Yichen snapped, ears burning as he shoved blindly at the older man, realizing how his words were interpreted. "Perverted monkey!"

A startled sound, sounding more choked up and unintentional than anything he'd ever heard from the demon, drew Zhuo Yichen's attention. With furrowed brows he directed his gaze back to the demon, who stared down at Zhuo Yichen's hand on his ribs, where he had shoved far more lightly than anyone who claimed to loathe Zhao Yuanzhou would. Zhao Yuanzhou stood completely still, it was likely he hadn't even realized the noise had come from him, his mind processing the brief electrifying sensation that had become so foreign to him.

No one had ever- Not since he and Li Lun were children, thousands of years ago.

While his mind caught up, his body, however, seemed to recall perfectly the protocol for this type of situation as Zhuo Yichen repeated the motion. He was up on his feet in an instant, shielding the spot protectively from the other's reach, mouth opening and closing silently in surprise.

Zhuo Yichen felt his own eyebrow raise and something that resembled amusement swelling inside him, that he quickly tried to stifle but was not at all successful. Of all things, this is what it takes to get him speechless?

Well, if it'll shut him up.

Rising to his feet, he reached once again for Zhao Yuanzhou's torso, only for the demon to sidestep him with lightning quick reflexes, still wide eyes fixed on Zhuo Yichen like he wasn't sure whether to look like the younger man had hung the moon or issued upon Zhao Yuanzhou the biggest betrayal of his life. Zhuo Yichen huffed, pushing down the exasperated fondness that threatened to show on his face. Dramatic.

Time and time again he aimed at whatever spot was closest with Zhao Yuanzhou stepping off to the side at each try until they twirled around one like two performing courtesans. "So you can act like a child at your convenience?" Zhao Yuanzhou flashed a pleased smile, his side merely inches away from Zhuo Yichen's grasp. His face muscles visibly strained from fighting a massive grin the longer the more frustrated Zhuo Yichen got with his dodging. "Xiao Zhuo, you've asked me to dance with you earlier and now we're playing together? You flatter me too much."

Why was his face so warm? "Shut up!"

Propelling down in a heap of entangled limbs, as soon as Zhuo Yichen managed a hold of both Zhao Yuanzhou's shoulders the two collapsed to the floor. Zhuo Yichen's suddenly pounding heart didn't distract him from his mission of getting a reaction out of the demon. Too late to back down now. The very moment Zhao Yuanzhou's back collided with the floor and Zhuo Yichen's front pressed against his, the swordsman drilled unforgiving fingers into his ribcage.

The reaction was instantaneous, the vibrating digits drawing out a chortle that was so... natural, so genuine, so unlike the demon's usually theatrical and joking responses to everything not life-threatening that happened around him that Zhuo Yichen found himself wanting to hear more.

Zhao Yuanzhou yelped, buckling and twisting while his sides were targeted with fire rapid squeezes. His hands flew down to grasp at Zhuo Yichen's wrists firmly, yet, strangely enough, not pushing them away, merely holding onto them as if that made the sensation more bearable. When a squirm caused Zhuo Yichen to topple forward with his face indecently close to Zhao Yuanzhou's, the demon finally let a delighted grin take over his cheeks. "So fohohorwahard! Aren't yohou worrihihied peheheople mihight see and get the wrohohong idea?"

There he goes again. Way to shatter the illusion. "The only thing to see here is yours ugly face!"

A flurry of pokes and kneading descending on his stomach shut the demon up for a mere moment with shrill giggles that haven't left his mouth in thousands of years, the strange fuzzy and giddy feeling enveloping his mind making words tumble out the very instant he was granted a reprieve. "Dihihisrespehecting your eldehehers nohow? Have yohou truly turned back into a chihihihild?"

The expression on Zhuo Yichen's face closed off in a stormy look that matched his voice. Yet, curiously, didn't match the effort Zhuo Yichen put into ensuring he didn't dig into the man's stomach with enough force for it to be painful. "Zhao Yuanzhou, start acting your age if you want to be treated like it!"

"I gihihive! Have mehehercy on thihihis old dehemon!" Zhao Yuanzhou snorted, only now starting to push those tormenting hands away with so little strength Zhuo wasn't persuaded in the slightest. Red smoke started gathering around him, curling and twisting wildly in the air and conveniently hiding the red flush on his cheeks. "Alrihihight, I'll go! I'll gohoho!"

In a cloud of dark red smoke, the demon scampered off to god knows where. Probably to whine to Wen Xiao. Let him complain all he wants, he'll be in for a second round if he makes the mistake of informing the woman what exactly had just transpired.

Zhuo Yichen rose back up, patting the dust off his robes and glancing in each direction to ensure no one else had seen him having his composure broken by the demon's taunting. Finding his gaze lingering longer on the path Zhao Yuanzhou had wandered down, fleeing like a small animal with its tail tucked between his legs, Zhuo Yichen felt the corners of his lips curling slightly upwards.

Ridiculous monkey.

[squeaky-n-blushy]

10.000 words in and uh. um. so there's some news.

Y'know how I split the tickle scene into 3 sections? Yeah. Well. Reviewing my notes I kinda noticed that each section is also sectioned into 3 subsections...? Subsection 1 of section 1 is done now, at least :') Section 1.1, you could say.

But even so, we're still in section 1, and not even halfway through it yet. Which means, the word count has risen yet again :') this is gonna be at least 15.000 words long :'')

FUCK

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YOU.

WHO TRIGGERED THE FUCKING CURSE WHO DID IT

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WHO TRIGGERED THE FUCKING CURSE WHO DID IT

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Once. You just have to ask once. Look me in the eyes, and ask me to tickle you.

I promise you that I'll tickle you until you are all tickled-out and ready for aftercare. But you do have to ask, just once. Look me in the eyes, and say it clearly that you want me to tickle you. That's all you have to do.

[squeaky-n-blushy]

Today the wheel has chosen: 39. "But touch is my love language!" And to go with this prompt I've picked Ler!Wen Kexing and Lee!Zhou Zishu from Word of Honor. Sprinkling in a bit of Faraway Wanderers!Canon too, because here they live with Chengling in Siji Manor rather than all alone up in that mountain like in the drama, and also because of the novel!canon use of "wife" when referring to WKX.

• Around 1.200 words (rlly thought I was gonna fail my own challenge in my first try)

"A-Xu, but touch is my love language!"

Zhou Zishu cast his deadpan stare upon the puppy-eyed menace who'd once been the most feared man of the Jianghu. Upon receiving the desired attention, the pleading in the eyes of the previous Ghost Valley Master intensified, the arms he'd wrapped around Zhou Zishu bringing him closer.

"And it's not enough for you to cling to me all night, you have to be glued to me all morning too? If I get up will you hang off me like a monkey?" He huffed, willing his eyes to roll so he'd tear his gaze away from Wen Kexing's dangerously powerful pout. "This one knows he hasn't been neglecting his wife, so don't you start spewing nonsense."

He was far from neglecting his partner. Wasn't he still here, lazing about in bed hours after he'd risen, solely because Wen Kexing suddenly felt clingier than ever? Or so Wen Kexing expected him to believe, as if Zhou Zishu wasn't the world's renowned expert in identifying whenever Wen Kexing was up to something.

At first he'd assumed Wen Kexing sought to have him in bed all morning to satisfy the raging sexual drive they couldn't quell with their overly concerned disciple in the house, who ran to check on their well-being at the first strange noise he'd hear coming from their room. But roughly two hours of cuddling had passed without Wen Kexing trying anything (not even rising to the bait when Zhou Zishu himself tried initiating it), with his hands roaming like someone taking in through touch everything down to the finest details of a sculpture. Except, roaming everywhere but to the most expected of places.

"So grouchy in the face of my affections. How can I be sure you really care for me when you insist on leaving my arms cold and empty?" Wen Kexing sighed across from him, shaking his head both in playful desolation and to nuzzle closer to Zhou Zishu's collarbone, a hand trailing over the same exact spot on Zhou Zishu's side he must have already traced over at least half a dozen times in the past hour alone, increasingly lighter with each pass.

This time, Zhou Zishu's torso twitched ever so slightly out of its own accord, almost imperceptibly. His huff of exasperation carrying just the slightest hint of laughter.

Wen Kexing, of course, noticed immediately. The dawning delight and mischievousness on his face informing the lord of the manor that the other had finally achieved his goal. The arms wrapped tenderly around him now ensnared him in a restrictive embrace and Zhou Zishu felt a shudder go through him as the hands previously resting upon his sides now latched on with purpose.

"What," he bit out to push down the less dignified sounds that threatened to flow from his lips, color already tinting his cheeks. "Do you think you're doing?"

He knew exactly what his own personal pest was doing. And he was not giving Wen Kexing the satisfaction of seeing him break immediately when the other hadn't even truly begun yet.

Wen Kexing smiled at him. A smile full of teeth and Zhou Zishu didn't trust it one bit. "Didn't I basically tell you just now? It's called showing affection." The long fingers curling into claws over the thin fabric of his sleeping robes, poised and waiting, felt far more devilish than affectionate. The glint in Wen Kexing's eyes, even more so. "Can't this one show how much he adores you?"

Zhou Zishu scoffed, the corners of his lips curling up into a miniscule smile, certainly from the slow drag of nails on his waist and not from the spark of fondness blossoming in his chest. "Ridiculous."

Half a second. Half a second was all it took for the concession that they both knew it was to be registered into Wen Kexing's mind, and half a second was all it took for vibrating hands to pry snicker after embarrassing snicker from the previous leader of the Tian Chuang. Unrelenting fingers seemed to be everywhere at once, squeezing his waist, slipping into his robe to rain skitters upon his stomach, digging into his sides and poking and kneading all over his back. With the iron grip encasing him, no amount of half-heartedly swatting at Wen Kexing's hands dislodged them from their targets.

"Ah-ah, now where do you think you're going?" Wen Kexing tutted as instinct had Zhou Zishu seeking to twist out of his embrace, unleashing both his demonic hands to spider and flutter gently on his partner's shoulder blades and lower back, making the man arch back into him. Wen Kexing's cheeks stung delightfully from the wicked grin spreading across his face at Zhou Zishu's lovely, reinvigorated squirming, the urge within him to playfully torment buzzing contentedly as his beloved slipped into silent laughter. "Running from my loving touch as if it burns, sparing not even a thought for my delicate feelings? A-Xu, have you no heart?"

"Have yohohou-" Zhou Zishu gasped and spasmed as a single finger curled and uncurled, scritching lightly at the small of his back, the soft tickling sensation lighting up all his nerves, turning all his muscles to mush and ripping giggles out of him. Wen Kexing had the audacity to coo at him. Zhou Zishu sent him a glare, which didn't deter him in the slightest as he kept up his ministrations and his sharp grin. Light touches always felt infinitely worse, and that bastard knew it well. "And have yohohu no shahame? How ohohold ahahare you?!"

"Old enough to appreciate the finest things in life, such as having my zhiji lighting up this gloomy morning with the radiant smile he hides so frequently." Wen Kexing all but chirped, sneaking a couple teasing fingers into his underarm his as his other hand stood happily rooted between his shoulder blades, tracing the line of his spine. A theatrical, pleased sigh could barely be heard over Zhou Zishu's now louder chuckles while Wen Kexing burrowed his face on Zhou Zishu's neck, leaving ticklish kisses along the bare skin. "The brightness of the sun couldn't possibly compare."

At Zhou Zishu's attempted sound of protest, which Wen Kexing chose to interpret as a response to his words and not to the consecutive tazering of his spine, he tsked, gently nipping the skin, mock scolding dripping from his tone. "Really, A-Xu, I spent so much time mapping out the perfect spots, all while trying to disturb your peace as little as possible. You could try being a little more considerate."

Amidst his sporadic giggles, Zhou Zishu did his best to feign a nonchalant tone. "I mihihissed the part where whahatehehever you choose to spend your tihihime on is my problem."

Wen Kexing clutched at his own chest as if fatally wounded, his eyes enormous and far too offended for it to be genuine. "Such harsh words, husband!" Before Zhou Zishu could answer with anything that would strengthen the man's 'slighted wife' act any further, Wen Kexing crawled on top of him, promptly pinning Zhou Zishu with his weight, hands descending onto his ribs. "Maybe some more affection will wear you down, hm?"

Zhou Zishu suppressed a smile. It was going to be a long morning.

[squeaky-n-blushy]

Welcome, everyone, to what will most likely be a massive yet much needed pain in the ass (writing exercise) for me

Squeaky's Short Fic Challenge

In which I will be picking sentence starters I like from these two lists, putting them in a picker wheel and letting it choose which prompt I will use that day, and writing a t-fic with characters that come to my mind! Except, those fics cannot be longer than 1.500 words. Can you hear me crying yet?

Of course, people are also welcome to pick prompts out of those two lists and submit them to me with characters of their choosing, and I'll add that to the wheel too! You can specify which role (Lee/Ler/Switch) you want each character to have, or you can leave it up to me. You decide!

Most fandoms I'm willing to write for aren't too well known here, but just in case anyone's interested, I'll be writing for:

• Mo Dao Zu Shi / The Untamed

• Word of Honor

• Epic: The Musical (Mortal characters only)

• Fangs of Fortune

• QSMP

• Sander Sides

So yeah, that's it! I'll let you guys know when I'm no longer accepting requests. Wish me good luck cuz I'll be needing it 🫡

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100 T-Word Writing Prompts

1. “Now, that was interesting.”

2. “I don’t laugh.”

3. “You seem scared.”

4. “Where is it?”

5. “Ya know, I have my ways…”

6. “Your attempts are futile.”

7. “This isn’t over.”

8. “Well, someone’s grouchy.”

9. “Hey, cheer up.”

10. “I can’t be held responsible for what I’m about to do to you.”

11. “How can someone not be ticklish??”

12. “Hold on, I can explain…”

13. “You know it’s wrong to lie, right?”

14. “Come at me. I dare you.”

15. “You’re so cute.”

16. “Is that a challenge?”

17. “I will kick you.”

18. “You wanna die?”

19. “I’ll make you regret that.”

20. “C'mon. Smile.”

Keep reading

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TheBest-Medicine’s Spectacular Summer

Sentence Starter TickleFic Prompts:

Please feel free to send in ideas / fandoms / pairings / prompts including these or use them yourself as some inspiration for some writing or art! honestly I wanted an excuse and some guidance to write out some more tickle fic ideas I’ve been having lately. So anyway here’s 105 fic starters / prompts (somebody stop me).

“Was that a giggle just now?”

“Hey, what do you think you’re doing?

“Come any closer and I will end you.”

“Oh, you shouldn’t have done that..” / “Oh, you shouldn’t have said that..”

“No, I’m just- uh- sensitive.”

“You think you’re real tough, huh?”

“No way, you’re ticklish here too?”

“I’ll have you know, I was the reigning tickle fight champion in my house growing up.”

“Did you just… laugh?”

“Don’t look at me like that.”

“Why are you so nervous all of the sudden?”

“So, what’s this I hear about you being deathly ticklish?”

“I don’t / can’t believe it.”

“Well, well, well… Look what we have here.”

“Don’t even think about it.”

“Come on, stop it - I’m serious, that really tickles!”

“What’s there to be embarrassed about?”

“I swear on my life, I will kill you.”

“Wait, are you stuck?”

“I will never forgive you for this, you bastard / jerk / dick / asshole / expletive.”

“Big talk for someone so ticklish.”

“Don’t make me make you.”

“Wait a minute, you’re not ticklish, are you?”

“Sounds like someone needs a visit from the tickle monster.”

“Well now you’re just asking for it.”

“Wow. You’re bold.”

“I hope you know that this means war.”

“You wouldn’t happen to be ticklish, would you?”

“Be careful, I’m ticklish (there).”

“Uh oh, someone’s in trouble.”

“Come on, it’s not that bad, is it?”

“Who would have thought a few tickles would be your doom?”

“You wouldn’t.”

“You’re in for it as soon as we’re alone.”

“What? Me? Ticklish? As if!”

“A little birdie told me someone has ticklish feet / sides / knees / etc.”

“Wait - no, not that, anything but that!”

“You can’t be serious…”

“What did you just say?”

“I’ve never heard you laugh like that before, it’s nice.”

“I never thought I’d see the day…”

“No way, are you crying / begging?”

“Lighten up, have a laugh!”

“You wouldn’t take advantage (of that knowledge) when I’m stuck like this, right? …Right?!”

“Heh. That all you’ve got?”

“I’m not letting you off that easy.”

“Make me.”

“You would think you’d get less ticklish as you got older, but you’re the opposite!”

“It’s not your fault you’re so ticklish.”

“Please, I can’t take it anymore!”

“Oh you’d like / love that, wouldn’t you?”

“What about (name), (are they) ticklish?” “Huh? What - me?!”

“Hmm, looks like the tables have turned…”

“Oh man, is this a bad spot?”

“Please! I’ll do whatever you want!”

“I never would’ve pegged you as the ticklish type.”

“You better not tell anyone about this.”

“I can think of a few ways to make you talk.”

“Why so nervous?”

“Don’t- don’t you dare! Don’t even t-think about it!”

“You’d better keep quiet.”

“I haven’t seen you smile all day / week!”

“Too bad there’s nothing you can do about it.”

“Relax, I’m not gonna kill ya. But I am gonna make you wish you were dead.”

“I just wanna be close to you.”

“Don’t tell me you’re ticklish?!”

“Well now, that seems like wishful thinking.”

“What’s that? Stop saying tickle, tickle, tickle, tickle, tickle?”

“You have five seconds to run.”

“Wait, not there - anywhere but there!”

“This isn’t cuddling! This is an attack!”

“As soon as I get out of this I hope you know I’m going to murder you.”

“I hope you’re not too ticklish.”

“Oh man, that looks bad.”

“Uh, oh. Someone’s ticklish.”

“Don’t tell me you’ve been hiding this all this time?!”

“There’s nowhere to hide.”

“Aww, are you blushing? That’s adorable.”

“You’re not going anywhere.”

“You should know better than to try to keep secrets from me.”

“What did I just say!?”

“You’re not really gonna tickle me, are you?”

“I didn’t think you had it in you.”

“You’d better give up now or this is about to get a lot worse.”

“Don’t be an idiot.”

“Crap. Wait. I didn’t mean that.”

“…That was brutal.”

“We don’t have time for such childish— hey! Stop it!”

“Wait no- Not here- Not now!”

“Just wait until I get you back.”

“Have mercy!”

“Hey are you guys okay? I heard yelling (from the hall / outside) and— oh.”

“Oh? And what if I did?”

“Revenge is so, so sweet.”

“You can’t be serious!?”

“What are you so scared of? It’s just a feather / brush / etc.”

“Oh, sorry, did that tickle?”

“There it is! That laugh is music to my ears.”

“Don’t make me get your (worst spot).”

“Would you just shut up and tickle me already?”

“You’re in for it now!”

“You are so going to regret that.”

“Let’s make it interesting.”

“What, did you think you were just going to get away with that?”

“Hey, a bet’s a bet.”

[squeaky-n-blushy]

KANENE. DO US BOTH A FAVOR AND SAY MY NAME THREE TIMES IN FRONT OF A MIRROR. I'LL JUMP OUT OF THE MIRROR LIKE AN APPARITION TO GIVE YOU THE BIGGEST HUG EVER BECAUSE WHAT IS THIS???!!!!! WHAT IS THIS ❓❓❓‼️‼️‼️

Everyone, gather round. People, you don't understand how incredible this is. YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND. And I'm not saying this because I'm biased. This is deadass one of the greatest tfics I've ever read. It's hard to get me blushing while reading a fic, but this- Wow- Jesus Christ- Goodness gracious- I had to leave the room because I was audibly squealing. The teasing in this, y'all- It killed me several times over.

It was not only the teasing that kept me up until three a.m jumping around my house like a giggly kangaroo full of energy, but the CHARACTERIZATION- THE SETTING THE CHARACTERS WERE IN- Kanene, anyone who's ever had the pleasure of reading any of your works could truthfully tell you how spectacular your writing is. But it's not just well-written, like the way a dissertation would be well-written, but it's truly special. The characters are completely in-character, of course, I feel like at this point we're all very aware that "out-of-character" doesn't exist in your writing. But more than that, the characters feel real. The whole experience is so immersive it invites us to step into the characters' shoes and feel first-hand what they feel. Deadass. That's the only thing that could explain the love and fondness swelling in me everytime these two characters got lovey dovey and soft together, AND HOW FUCKING FLUSTERED I FELT WITH EACH TEASE AS IF JIN GUANGYAO HIMSELF WAS STANDING IN MY ROOM RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME AND MAKING DIRECT EYE CONTACT WITH ME.

As always, spoilers under the cut

First and foremost, THE HIDING FROM THE WENS ARC 💕💖💕💖💕 MY FRIEND YOU KNOW HOW TO TUG AT MY HEARTSTRINGS EXPERTLY. There's so much potential in that arc, and you wrote it like a a PRO. The slowly getting to know and trust (and yearn for) one another to the point where Meng Yao (Meng Yao, the most anxious and paranoid character of the whole show) is willing to BE COMPLETELY PHYSICALLY VULNERABLE AND TI LET GO OF CONTROL BECAUSE HE IS SO FUCKING SMITTEN. The hair brushing scene and scalp massage by the way???? Sweet fuck. Concentrated gay juice. It was incredible to read, I could straight up feel the yearning. I've said this before but I ADORE how you write Meng Yao/Jin Guangyao. The perfect mix of ambition, paranoia and longing <3

[Meng Yao closed his eyes and held his body together to not crumble, scream nor do anything at the new information acquired.] ME READING THIS FIC.

And with the fast-forwading in time it was so cool to see how Jin Guangyao handled being in Koi Tower as neither the Sect Leader nor as his father's puppet. He was still slightly stressed out and freaked out, of course, he's still Jin Guangyao, but him realizing his brother wasn't a threat <3 HIM AND JIANG YANLI <3 <3 HE DESERVES HAVING HER AS HIS JIE

[continued to call him closer to hold and distract his nephew (small and gurgling and so, so fragile in his arms, learning how to babble shushu when he saw him and unmercifully keeping a tight grip on his heart)] SOBBING IN JOY IN LOVE IN DELIGHT. A-LINGGGGGGGGG <3 <3 A-LING AND HIS XIAO SHUSHU <3 THANK YOU KANENE FOR KILLING OFF JIN GUANGSHAN SO JIGGY CAN PEACEFULLY HOLD HIS BABY NEPHEW <3

Him growing to actually consider Jin Zixuan and Jiang Yanli as his family oh my god 💕💖💕💖 little him, freshly kicked down the stairs of Koi Tower, would have never imagined this

THE INTIMACY BETWEEN JIN GUANGYAO AND LAN XICHEN, KANENE- THEM CALLING EACH OTHER "MY HEART/MY LOVE" ALWAYS HOLDING HANDS AND LEAVING LITTLE KISSES- That bit later on about JGY kissing LXC's biceps and forearms when Xichen was trying so hard not to bring his arms down was burnt into my brain.

The transition between massage and tiny tickles TEEEEHEEEEEEEEE JUST IMAGINING IT HAS ME ALL GIGGLY!! [“Later, please, A-Yao.” His voice tilted into a giggly tune, but Xichen was able to stop it, hands flying to hold those smaller, playful ones in (a bit warning) squeeze. “Let me finish this, then you may…” The color spread even more on his cheeks, and he coughed politely.] Someone just consented to be wrecked with the gentlest and most delightful and tormenting of tickles <3

[“Has Xichen-ge never been tickled before?” 

“Ah, not much, not much.” His eyes turned away from him and Meng Yao could see the half-truth for what it was.] Kanene 👁️👁️ What's that half-truth? Explain pls 👁️👁️

[but suddenly Meng Yao could see it perfectly: Lan Xichen under him, answering to his every touch, smiling uncontrollably, laughing completely unashamed, loud and bright, capturing the entire light of the sky in his smile, making all kind of sounds that he would have to repeat over and over again until Meng Yao could engrave them fully in his mind, squirming, trashing around and pleading amidst his laughter, face red and teary, wrinkling eyes staring him full of joy and mirth, glimpse of hidden, velvety skin appearing here and there, showing more delightful spots to explore.]

GOD

okay ahem moving on nothing happened here

Meng Yao's fingers twitching to Get Xichen <3 <3 congrats, Lan Xichen, you brought a tickle monster into the world. JGY being so concerned about it that it brought on the rare occurrence where his mouth is faster than his brain and him ASKING TO BE TICKLED FIRST EHEHEEEEE THAT EASTER EGG ABOUT "THE COLLECTION" WAS SO GOOD!!!! I was wondering, after reading The Collection, how the two of them got into that situation AND NOW I KNOW :DDD

Lan Xichen lowkey stalling on finishing his work because he'd be tickled as soon as he did ahdkshsk what a terrible, horrible situation to be in, truly <3 I'm definitely not giggly thinking about it <3 (I FELT IT AS IF I WERE HIM FR)

[“You’re so very skilled, so reliable and responsible, but for now, please allow me to take care of everything.”] + [“May I?”] + [“Let me look after you.”] GOD THIS KIND OF DIALOGUE FUCKING GETS ME EVERY TIME- SHOWING THAT, IN THE END, WHAT THE EXPERIENCE IS ALL ABOUT IS CARING FOR THE OTHER PERSON. IM GONNA DIE.

[Trust me, Jin Guangyao wanted to say, words almost spilling along his desire in front of the who mattered the most, let me show you how much I know your every weakness, every reaction, every sensitive part of yours, let me show how good I can take care of all of them. Let me bring you everything you are looking for, all the joy, all the happiness, all the delight, let me pry each one of them from you and lay it all in your hands. Lay all of yourself in my hands. Let me, let me, let me. ] I AM INSANE ABOUT THIS PARAGRAPH???? I AM ACTUALLY INSANE ABOUT IT. KANENE WHAT DID YOU PUT IN IT. SWEET FUCK, MY FRIEND. WHAT IN THE WORLD. IT'S GONNA LIVE RENT FREE IN MY MIND FOR WEEKS.

ALSO, ALL THE FOCUS ON THE BACK AND SIDES AND NECK- TUMBLR USER KANENE-YAAAY YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU DID, TARGETING ME LIKE THIS. SO MEAN TO ME </3 DOES OUR FRIENDSHIP MEAN NOTHING TO YOU </3

[“Huan-gege’s laughter is truly a blessing.” Lan Xichen shook his head, and he nibbled that spot behind his ear in reply, pulling a squeal, giggling and giggling non-stop. “Even if he keeps running from my care. There is no worry, however, I will keep bringing him back as much as we need to, again and again.”] Again, I've already said this, but the way you use "care" in your writing is actually spectacular and so flustering in case you weren't aware.

[He grinned and controlled the urge to attack him again, to turn Xichen around, hold his arms away and once more find his way to the most delicious spots and torment him, pulling joyous laughter again and again and-] YET ANOTHER SENTENCE THAT WAS BURNT INTO MY BRAIN. AARRRRRGGGGHHH FOR REASONS I AM NOT ALLOWED TO ELABORATE BUT KNOW THAT IM JUMPING UP THE WALLS AND BARKING

[“Why don’t you come back up, hm?”

Xichen’s eyes followed to his open arms, fingers wiggling slightly, not even pretending to hide what would come of his fate would he choose to come back to his embrace.] KANENE OH MY GOD. I KEEP SAYING IT, I KEEP SAYING THAT HAVING YOUR LER INVITE YOU INTO THEIR ARMS AND THEN WILLINGLY WALKING INTO THEM, KNOWING EXACTLY WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF YOU DID, WOULD BE THE MOST DELIGHTFUL AND FLUSTERING EXPERIENCE EVER. THANK YOU FOR PROVING ME RIGHT BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY THANK YOU FOR WRITING THIS OH MY GOD.

[Jin Guangyao clicked his tongue and cooed in exaggerated empathy, as if his hands were tied and there was nothing he could do to save him from his current predicament.] Unbelievable how every paragraph has me thinking "yup. If this character was canonically interested in tickling, this is exactly how they'd act." Tell me Kanene, was it hard to get into MXTX's head?

[“I would be so happy to find, tease and tickle any and every spot that my Huan-gege would be kind enough to guide me. Anywhere he wants, any spot that would leave him relaxed, content and laughing his heart out and I would stay there, tickling and tickling again and again for as long as you want. Doesn't this sound like a nice offer?”]

CHRIST KANENE YOU'RE OUT FOR MURDER WITH THIS FIC

I WAS ALREADY DEAD AND SQUEALING ON THE FLOOR, AND THEN THE "Doesn't this sound like a nice offer?" FUCKING OBLITERATED MY SOUL AND ALL THAT REMAINED OF MY SANITY.

[“So kind of my Huan-ge to let this one be deserving of his laughter, for returning so wingilly to my hug and following so perfectly my instructions, for trusting me like this.” He nuzzled him, pulling a higher joyous squeal before finally giving Lan Xichen his well deserved prize.

He took a deep breath and burrowed his face in his neck with a giant raspberry.] THE CONTRAST BETWEEN THESE TWO PARAGRAPHS. YES. YES. THAT IS JIN GUANGYAO. SWEET, DISARMING WORDS AND RUTHLESSNESS. HIM <3 YOUR PORTRAYAL OF HIM <3

[His voice got even more gentle. “I wish you would let those you love-” (me, me, me) “take care and carry your burdens along with you as well. We would be so happy to do so, as much as you need, for as long as you need.”] foaming at the mouth

ALL THE PARAGRAPHS LEADING UP TO JIN GUANGYAO'S SECOND RASPBERRY ATTACK ON XICHEN'S NECK- THE ANTICIPATION JESUS FUCKING CHRISTTTTTT

[“There is no bigger honor in the world than to be allowed to have you in my arms, er-ge. to be granted the opportunity to take care of you, to pick each one of your reactions and vulnerabilities and then pick you carefully apart so I can give each little piece the attention it deserves and rearrange them all together.”] Os gays mana os gays

THAT ENTIRE PARAGRAPH THAT TRANSLATED INTO "I LOVE YOU" BECAUSE JIN GUANGYAO COULDN'T SAY IT PLAINLY OUT LOUD- AND LAN XICHEN KNOWING THAT WHAT JIN GUANGYAO MEANT TO SAY WITH IT WAS "I LOVE YOU"- I CAN'T WITH THESE TWO GOODNESS GRACIOUS

KANENE, YOU'VE TRULY OUTDONE YOURSELF THIS TIME. I MEAN IT. I HOPE YOU'RE INSANELY PROUD OF THIS FIC, BECAUSE MY GOD, YOU DESERVE THAT PRIDE. Thank you thank you thank you for this incredible, marvelous gift. This was truly incredible to read, there wasn't a single moment where I wasn't grinning with joy reading it for the first time and re-reading it now. You made my day genuinely remarkable and I'm going to carry this gist in my heart forever and ever <3 Obrigada 💕💖

(Also, some tiny details I loved, because tiny details deserve attention too!

• Meng Yao perfuming LXC's hair so he'd have another reason to keep brushing teehee

• "finally giving him something worth of keeping, adorning, marking the First Jade of Gusu Lan." that "marking"... 👁️👁️

• The hint of animosity between JGY and Nie Mingjue ahdkrhskdh

• JGY ditching the banquet the second it became socially acceptable to, to go after LXC. Man's whipped and concerned.

• WEN QING BECOMING A SECT LEADER!!!!!!!!!

• JGY brooding about LXC bringing work to his room

• "Reasoning #5 was right after all, who would say." Meng Yao you are a certified Creature

• That paragraph where Jin Guangyao removed Lan Xichen's forehead ribbon- Kanene- Kanene you knew exactly what you were doing

• JGY BEING SOOO DRAMATIC WHEN LXC TOOK A WHILE TO GET BACK INTO HIS ARMS 💕💕

• JGY going to town on LXC'S armpits whenever LXC tried to interrupt JGY's lovely speech <3

• JGY OH SO TENDERLY WIPING AWAY LXC'S TEARS OF LAUGH OOAAAUUGGHHHHH)

Let Me Take Care Of You

Or: How To Say I'm In Love Without Words

Kanene's Notes: FEBRUARY, 13TH, YA KNOW WHAT A SPECIAL DAY IT IS? IT'S @squeaky-n-blushy's BIRTHDAY!!!!! <3 <3 <3 I made this special gift for her and I do hope all of you enjoy this just as much, as well ^v^)s2 It was a delight to write this story

Also, all the most and dearest thanks to @a-fluffer-nutter for being such an incredible Beta-Reader!! Thank so so much! :D :DD <3

Warnings: Mentions and suggestive themes here and there, nothing too explicit but still. Lots of antecipation, soft, rough and mouth tickles (raspberries, nibbles etc). Romatic Pairing. Around 16.000 words

[~*~]

It was as soft as it looked. 

That was Meng Yao’s first thought as the simple, wooden comb carded through those lustrous, dark black hair, fingers holding each patch next to his roots firmly to lessen the discomfort as he undid another knot, twisting the unworthy comb here and there and purposely not thinking too much about how Lan Xichen was quiet, letting out sparse and tiny sounds of relaxation, which made each one of his fingertips tremble.

A firm brush and the last knot gave in, leaving Meng Yao to add a little more of perfuming oil to help the dehydrated strands and pretend he had more reasons to keep brushing. 

If he didn’t know better than to lie so bluntly to himself, he would say that all of his lasting touch and everlasting care was nothing but a necessity, since keeping himself on Lan Xichen’s good side was important, no, essential for his future. He could pretend that there was no actual, true contentment in seeing his hair begin little by little to gain back its smoothness and softness it once held. He could say that buying that fancy oil that lasted through several hours was simply a necessary sacrifice. He would never take the risk of using his simple, cheap one and having the other’s hair react badly after years of receiving nothing but the best treatment, after all, not with someone so important as the very heir, now leader, of the Gusu Lan Sect. He could even argue that helping him this moment was nothing more than a part of his carefully sewn together plan, only so that after this war Lan Xichen, or better, the leader of the righteous, just and grand Lan Sect, would pull him so higher than ever on the social hierarchy much quickly than the years he would have to wait otherwise, finally being able to start the plan of climbing much further way, so that his father would have no right or opportunity to throw him down and look away again.

(For a moment he imagined it, being draped in the Jin Sect’s bright and fancy robes, using a gold comb that he would be able to decorate Xichen’s hair with it, letting it shine bright amidst that sea of black, finally giving him something worth of keeping, adorning, marking the First Jade of Gusu Lan.)

The oil had an unpleasant sensation, much better than the ones he used but still too cold and lasting all the same. Meng Yao knew that even washing it off wouldn’t be enough to take the smell and slippery touch away. Even so, the irritation was light, going as quickly as it came as he carded his hands through every strand, being careful to coat each one of them equally.

Unfortunately, Meng Yao knew himself better than this. The very moment he kneeled on his bed and Xichen easily fell on the floor in front of him, showing him his back so easily and closing his eyes at the first movements of his comb, Meng Yao felt his entire soul falter unstably. When he parted his hair in half and got the full view (and not only the small glimpse when they trained together and his mind would unfortunately focus on futile and useless non-combat information) of the back of his neck and his mouth parted instinctively. When he experimentally (“accidentally”) scratched his scalp and got a muffled pleased sound, so tiny and vulnerable that it made his mind hone in, instinctively in attention, his fingers moved on their own, combing, scratching and mapping which places left Xichen melting and leaning more and more on him. He engraved every bit of information in the fiber of his muscles, so they could continue as his mind wandered in senseless daydreams. 

The moment Meng Yao finally looked up to his window, watched the moon set much higher than he thought in the sky, when he realized he had no idea how much time had passed, that was the moment he knew that there was no turning back for him.

He continued his ministrations, burrowing his hand carefully under the hair until his fingers could scrape at his scalp, seeing the shiver that ran down his shoulders, skin prickling with goosebumps. Slowly, he straightened his hair once more, scooting closer to the edge of his mattress and tipping slightly forward so Xichen could lay comfortably on his torso, feeling as the taller one practically let all his weight fall on him. Looking down, he saw the Lan stare back at him with a comfortable and open smile on his face, eyelids closing and opening slowly enough for Meng Yao to be absorbed, smothered, and surrounded by the sheer adoration and trust clear on his gaze. It took everything from the Jin to survive as the other sighed and became completely lax on his chest, head fitting the crook of his neck as if it was always meant to be there. 

Later, Meng Yao decided, he would throw himself in the coldest bath he could arrange and then organize his thoughts. For now, all he could do was to take a (non-shuddering) deep breath and not snuggle closer to the warmth. It’s was an awkward position, but worth the slight uncomfortable bending of his arm, to gather all his hair in one hand (he was planning to make a loose braid for easy caring in the morning but unfortunately his plan had been thrown away due the circumstances, again) and combing the most stubborn strands together. As his touch neared the back of his ear, Lan Xichen twitched slightly on his hold.

The shorter man didn’t even bat an eye to the sudden desire in own chest to kiss the other’s temple in a soothing gesture so he could go back to sleep peacefully. 

(And what a heresy that would be. Living so far away from Gusu Lan, his knowledge about their customs was still sparse, but, even in the eyes of an ignorant it would be clear how their forehead ribbons are important for the Lans, and Lan Xichen held an absolute care for his. Meng Yao could never try to taint the white fabric with his dirty self.)

Therefore, with a lighter touch, in apology, he spared only two fingers and his most careful touch and went back to the spot to straighten the rebelled, short strands. Once more, Xichen twisted the slightest bit away from his touch, snuggling and worming himself closer to his neck. Mumbled words hit his skin and set fire across his every nerve.

“Funny ich.” Xichen mumbled, clearly still lost in his sleep. 

Meng Yao closed his eyes and held his body together to not crumble, scream nor do anything at the new information acquired. He now knew how it felt to hold Lan Xichen so close that he could feel each letter leaving his lips, he knew how his hair felt and how he curled in himself closer to any warmth when sleeping and his mind was still processing all of this. Locking his reaction in a far corner away in his mind, Meng Yao smiled and shook his shoulder lightly.

“Come to bed, ge, I am already finished.”

Xichen let out a confused displeased sound at the prospect of moving, turning around only enough to fall on the mattress then pull the rest of his body from the floor. Meng Yao huffed in amusement and carefully got out of the bed before he could get stuck on it (much to his own irrational and dangerous instinctive displeasure) and adjusted his torn but thick blanket over the other. With a quick turn and fast steps, he moved away to finish his daily chores and reflect about all the findings of this day.

[...]

Concentrating on the meeting was… difficult. Ever since his scum of father died just as he lived and Jin Zixuan assumed the title of Sect Leader together with Jin Yanli, Jin Guangyao found himself drifting away more often than not, senses not as high and body tensed as he turned every corner in Koi Tower. Somehow a part of himself slowly began to try to trust the peaceful life he has been living for years now. 

The Jin Sect, and especially himself, held plenty of enemies, even more after the victory in the Sunshot Campaign due to the short period where the sect turned its back to all the other three Great Sects and formed an alliance with the Wen. The entire revolution against Jin Guangshan and the rise of Jin Zixuan over his father, ending their support to the tyrant sect had been a good move to improve the cultivation world’s opinion against them. Even so, years after the war, the palace was still full of dangerous enemies that were just looking for just the tiniest show of weakness to latch on and destroy everything Jin Guangyao had been so dutifully building all along. 

All of this made him come to the conclusion and admit, even if begrudgingly, that his (extremely awkward and quite dumb) brother was not one of those enemies. His spouse, the oldest daughter from the very own Violet Spider herself, even if weak in cultivation, was still much attentive and plenty aware of his backgrounds, watching and taking care of the inwards work of the palace with almost as much influence of him himself. 

Yet, even with the power she held, the possibility to throw him away if she ever decided he was a danger to her spouse’s throne, her kindness was warm and gentle as she kept greeting him with a sincere smile, continued to call him closer to hold and distract his nephew (small and gurgling and so, so fragile in his arms, learning how to babble shushu when he saw him and unmercifully keeping a tight grip on his heart), called him day after day to share meals with her (their) family and spend uncountable afternoons coaxing (although he pretended to not notice for politeness) Zixuan to expend more leisure time with his brother. 

As time passed, the wish of showing them Lan Xichen grew stronger, to introduce him to them beyond his title in the Lan Sect, beyond his duty as a leader, beyond their political meetings and administrative trades. Jin Guangyao, on the slowest days, found himself planning how he would present their story together, and how he could explain (never completely, of course) the attachment they both shared and that only grew stronger with the years that went by. He hated the weakness, but would not lie to himself and pretend to not wish to show his family (beyond the tablet offerings he held in a beautiful constructed house and shrine on an isolated part of the family’s grounds), for the first time ever, who was his biggest weakness and the one he ever and most cared for. 

Sometimes, Jin Guangyao would pretend that if this ever happened it would go well, that he would have no lasting, almost animal fear at them knowing, that he would not cave to despair in the last second and cancel all the plannings while hiding Lan Xichen away, that the little apprehension held would immediately dissipate when Jin Furen smiled and approached quickly to hold their hands together, true happiness shining clear across her face and Sect Leader Jin (his brother) would freeze in an amusing surprise, would stutter and clear his throat and then say that he was happy for them, then pass through all the phases of grief as he re-contextualized all the “meetings” he had found Jin Guangyao and Lan Xichen together. In the end, he could imagine that they would not only accept, but also be content for him, for what he was able to find, for what they were all able to attain even through the darkest times of their lives.

It’s been years since the end of the war, years since his bruises healed and no one dared to lift a finger on him again in the Koi Tower, where he stood proud and confident on top of the stairs he was once thrown away, years since he proved his worth as a warrior and an advisor and guaranteed a place at the Sect Leader and Jin Furen’s side, since he became essential to the working of his sect. It had not been years (yet), still time passed as he began showing more real smiles and his body learned how to not live on the edge of danger every single day. 

Nowadays, he no longer scrambled so fiercely for information, worried to quickly build a trustful enough chain of spies across every important sect. Now, he already knew personally every attendant in that meeting room, their every relationship with each other, all trade and internal discussion and danger to his sect. His notes were extensive about each leader, each advisor and important disciples in their sects and years of gathering all of this had paid off. There was not a single person in this room who Jin Guangyao didn’t know their every telling and strategy.

And even if he didn’t know any of them… he would be forever personally attuned to the only one who was currently haunting his mind and making it wander in worry like this. Sect Leader Lan: Lan Xichen. Lan Huan.

Something was happening to him.

It was clear with the tight corners of his polite smile, the way his gaze unfocused from time to time, how he kept pulling his posture straighter and straighter as if afraid it would fall otherwise, how his feather hadn't taken a single note for almost an hour. It was the way Lan Wangji looked at him from the tail of his eye, impassive expression setting into a (displeased? worried? annoyed? disapproving? Probably a mix of it all) restless press of lips and he took a more active role in the discussion. Even Da-ge kept frowning from his seat, not even disguising at whom those sharp eyes were directed to, the brute. The only reason Jin Guangyao wasn’t rolling his eyes (besides how he would never be foolish enough to show his feelings in a room full of strangers and possible enemies, different from other leaders as it seems) and calling his attention subtlety for himself was because the others were still ignorant and naive enough to think Mingjue’s expression could only mean irritation at the poor and important Sect Leader Lan. Which reasons and rumors would be spread afterwards to justify their own interpretations of reality was something that Guangyao would be careful to search about later and deal with, if necessary.

At the moment, however, he had a much more important task in mind.

Half a shichen after the end of the banquet was announced, when all the absolute necessary conversations had already been held, Jin Guangyao excused himself to go to his quarters, throwing a meaningful glance (and slight warning, if he was being honest) to his leader and then following swiftly to the room he had gifted the Lan a couple years ago, decorated and designed entirely in Gusu Lan style and Xichen’s own personal preferences. As he approached, he was relieved to notice Mingjue going away in the distance, knowing his calculations had been right and he would have some proper alone time for his task. 

He waited a few moments outside the door, giving the other enough time to prepare more tea (they already knew each other so well) before rasping his knuckles on the threshold. 

“Er-ge,” his words were low and soft on their own, greeting the taller one as soon as he opened the door and let him inside. “Your work in Cloud Recesses is being truly unforgiving, to hurt your sleep schedule like this.”

“A-Yao.” Xichen smiled tiredly, agreeing with him as he passed the tea. Jin Guangyao quickly took the opportunity to get their hands together in a warm, comforting hold, thumbs slowly and carefully grazing their back in a soft touch, receiving a tiny, pleased sigh in answer. Minutes passed in silence before a quiet, defeated voice filled the space. “Wangji is trying to adopt A-Yuan into the Lan Sect.”

Jin Guangyao blinked, momentarily stunned. The information Su She passed to him was right after all. Somehow, it made sense. “It is difficult to adapt an already formed boy to the Lan rules. Your elders must be displeased.”

“More than that. They call it a disrespect and dishonor to our father, to bring anyone who holds the Wen name into Gusu Lan after all the blood spilled, especially into the main family.” His voice got even more tired. “Besides, Sect Leader Jiang has already claimed a similar proposal. If he succeeds in adding A-Yuan to his sect, it’s no doubt that Wangji will follow and spend more visits to the Yunmeng Sect than he does already.”

“Can we expect the Lotus Pier to gain another disciple soon, then?” Jin Guangyao remarked with a playful voice, succeeding in pulling those downward golden gaze to his face. Lan Xichen, probably with the same mental image of Lan Wangji serious face amidst a crowd of unruly disciples causing a ruckus in purple robes, huffed a laugh.

“A-Yao.” He chided weakly, then pressed his lips in a light irritation. “Wei-gongzi hasn’t even replied to any of Wangji’s courting attempts in any way nor form, nevertheless. Besides, my brother is a very important part of Gusu Lan, in the case of any future proposal, his parting to Yunmeng Sect will not be possible, of course.”

“Of course.” He replied swiftly, glad that he would not be present in that wedding discussion, even if Yanli-Furen would for certain be. Even if Wei Wuxian still showed no interest in the courtship, there was no mistake in the way his expression brightened and his touches lingered anytime Hanguang Jun was close. There was no doubt they would be reciprocated in the future.

Similarly, there was no mistaking how both of them were absolutely wrapped around Wen Yuan’s little finger. Even if Xichen, and possibly Sect Leader Jiang, held a soft spot for him as well, to want an adoption into the main family of Great Sect is already a huge move that would undoubtedly result into a nightmare under any circumstance. Ever since the war, the Wen Sect had been falling into a steady decadence, even under the giants efforts of Wen Qing, now Sect Leader, due all the sanctions and repayments the other sects demanded to prevent their full extermination after their victory. It would still take plenty of years for it to be even considered a Great Sect once more, even so, the fact that it held amiably enough relations with the Yunmeng Jiang and Gusu Lan Sect was a good thing. 

A comfortable silence surrounded them as he thought carefully in his answer. Jin Guangyao squeezed Xichen’s hand firmly in his, waiting for them to squeeze back before going back to the soothing rubs. “Er-ge, sure Hanguang Jun is aware how his wishes would be received by your elders and is grateful for the support you’ve been showing him so far, just as he must be aware of your limitations even and especially because of your position as the leader of the sect. He can’t expect you to solve such a sensitive matter by yourself so quickly.”

Lan Xichen turned to the side, lips pressing down even harder. Jin Guangyao could see clearly the words he had just swallowed.

“It’s not fair for no one to expect this from you.” 

Lan Xichen tensed and then exhaled, shoulders dropping, a clear invitation for him to get closer, which he did promptly.

“Even after his fair punishment, they continue to pressure him too much, some had been against his position as a teacher, saying he would teach our young generations wrong doings. I keep expecting to… find him gone.” His body tilted to his right and Jin Guangyao immediately crossed the table to press closer, supporting his weight. After a pause, he continued. “It’s foolish to think so, I know. There are still too many precious things in Gusu Lan for him. Who would remember all the 50 names he gave each bunny?” Jin Guangyao softly pulled his head to rest on his and he went easily. “It’s simply… Foundless fear, I know, and yet I keep finding myself too tired to push those frivolous thoughts away.”

“An excessive load of work, exhaustive conflicts and little sleep can do that, I’ve heard.” Lan Xichen sagged on him even more in protest, which made him curl lower, knowing he was right. Gracefully, Jin Guangyao simply pressed closer, one hand letting go of his hand to play with his hair. 

The true, effective way to help this situation was on the tip of his tongue, and yet Jin Guangyao faltered for a moment. In another moment of his life his words would be different, but it’s been years ever since family was simply a memory of the past and the people he trusted could be counted on two fingers. Nowadays… It was different.

“I am sure he appreciates your effort, and er-ge couldn’t be more right to say he still has too many precious things in Gusu to walk away. He has you, your shufu, his students and an entire life in your sect. There are… extremely rare and few things that could ever be more important than that. Even if the problem that brought this is unfortunately something that only time will bring your solution, your feelings might have an easier route to be assured.” He didn’t even need to see Xichen’s face to visualize the doubt there, in himself, so he pushed. “Perhaps it would be beneficial to confront Wangji about your fears. I am afraid anyone else won’t be truly able to vanish your thoughts except your brother.”

The other got quiet. After a few moments, Lan Xichen turned around and burrowed his face on his hair, taking a deep breath.

“‘don’t want to,” he murmured, a hint of a whine in his words. The change from his usual collected, almost poetic way to talk not so different from an unhappy child made Jin Guangyao almost snort in surprise, a chuckle escaping him anyway.

“I am afraid you will have to.” He smiled adoringly and melancholically playing with his strands, taking the offered chance to lighten the subject. “Or perhaps er-ge would enjoy the privileges of living in this humble one’s room? I’ve known you make a good pillow.”

Lan Xichen smirked and giggled quietly. “So I’ve heard.”

Going back to his upright position, Lan Xichen looked at him with a hopeful, a bit sad still, light in those mesmerizing golden eyes. Jin Guangyao let go of him and straightened himself as well, hands resting on his lap where they could hide his twitching fingers, hungry for more. He answered with attentive and open attention the clear question in Xichen’s body and expression.

“Unfortunately, I won’t be able to accept your offer today. If A-Yao is willing, however, tomorrow I would be more than happy to spend the afternoon here.”

Finally.

Jin Guangyao smiled, eyes crinkling, dimples showing.

“Er-ge will be of course the most welcome.”

[...]

“I truly apologize, A-Yao.” 

Jin Guangyao was sure that there was no flaw in his posture or expression, not a single hint that he was bothered as he prepared their tea and tried to not brood about how Xichen had brought his paperwork to his room. After so many years passed together, however, the Jin wasn’t really surprised that the Lan noticed nevertheless.

But Xichen sounded truly apologetic and the fact that he was unable to finish his necessary work only confirmed his suspicions of how much exhausted his beloved truly was. It would be no surprise when he confessed to having passed out on his desk later in the night, and yet, it bothered his heart imagining the scene all the same.

His plan must start immediately.

“It’s no matter, er-ge.” As he gave the tea to Xichen, he let his finger graze and almost rest on the other’s hand, pulling it slow enough for the touch to last and bring the attention to him. With a sweeter tune, soft enough to let Xichen imagine how it would sound if they were even closer, he continued, “Are you sure that there is no way that my help would be welcome?”

As expected, Xichen’s hand quickly took his, turning around and intertwining their fingers until Guangyao could feel each calluses born from years of being a musician and a fighter. Jin Guangyao was weak, so, so weak, so he moved closer.

“You’re always welcome, A-Yao.” He saw, however, the signs of refusal before the words began falling from his lips, and so he controlled his disappointment. Xichen’s hand squeezed his tighter and his eyelids twitched as if they wanted to press close. “But those letters need to hold my own handwriting and words, any less would be received as a careless act at best and an insult at worst. There are also permissions and revisions that only the Sect Leader can deal with.” He let out a tiny smile at the empathy coloring the other’s expression. “It will take less than half an incense stick, A-Yao, and then we can enjoy better this slow afternoon given to us. I won’t take long, I promise.”

Jin Guangyao was already expecting the answer, yet his heart still singing in realizing Lan Xichen hadn’t even doubted a second to bring such personal and important matters from his sect to his room, as if it wasn’t one of the biggest show of trust someone as important as him could show. Jin Guangyao lifted their hands and brought those long and skillful fingers to his lips, laying tiny, fleeting kisses in each one of his knuckles. Looking up and seeing the flustered state of the other, Guangyao let a small, mischievous grin grow, before letting it transform into a softer one, dimples showing. 

“Let this lowly one still be of your assistance then.”

“A-Yao-” The protesting words were already low and weak enough that it didn’t take more than a nip at the tip of his finger to stop them. Before he even had the chance to recover from such an attack, Jin Guangyao quickly slipped behind him, hands resting on his shoulders and pressing them softly enough to let his intentions clear. “Ah, please, there is no need…” He took in a quick breath as Guangyao dug in and massaged the muscles soothingly, from his shoulders to his arms then going back to his shoulders and resting at the base of his neck, thumbs pressing firmly as they followed his spine to his nape, before descending and starting the cycle again. When the protest came back, it held a hint of a pleased groan on it. “You must have so much work as well, truly. I am fine.”

This reminded him of their fugitive days in the war, about how Lan Xichen would flinch away from his touch on those first days, waking up in jolts and nightmares, then tense and stay still as proud, hurt statue, protesting his care even after growing much more comfortable and trustful in him. 

It’s been years since then and not only Xichen had grown much better at receiving back the love that he was so free to give, but also Jin Guangyao has also grown much better at coaxing his body and mind to relax, no longer holding back if it meant he would get the other to lighten. It was a pity that he couldn’t set all those papers on fire and command all his obligations to leave him alone, but at least he could make his moment of work much more bearable.

He only needed to convince the Lan to give him a permission that both of them desired so much.

“My heart,” he gathered his hair in one hand and pushed it to the side, just enough that one of his shoulders would be free for him to lay a single caring kiss at the base of his neck, giving him the perfect view of how he froze and swallowed at his actions. It was a blessing the other was wearing fewer layers of robes. “Please, wouldn’t you be so kind as to let me help? Ease the hurt I have in seeing you so stressed and exhausted like this.” Another kiss, he could feel the way  Xichen shivered in reply. “The same way you tended and took care of my bruises during the years we’ve known each other, won’t you let me show my care for you in the same way as well?”

A warm hand found the way to his cheeks and Jin Guangyao batted his eyelashes slowly to the golden eye that watched him so fondly, prying a huff of laughter from Xichen, who already recognized such song and dance so well. The cool hand brushed a lovely path from the corner of his mouth to his eyebrows, tracing them and his eyelids with  care, making him hum and widen even more his pleading gaze. 

“My A-Yao, if I tended you for every moment of our lives until the end of mine, still it wouldn’t be enough to repay all the care you’ve shown me.”

Jin Guangyao softened. “What a sad scenario, er-ge. If that was so, then I would be nothing happy to find immortality, only if to take care of you through every single reincarnation.” The hand in his face faltered and A-Yao kept it in place with his own, turning around to kiss his palm, but not straying too long from his look. “But, please, er-ge, don’t torture me for so long and let me cherish you right now.” 

Lan Xichen let out a shuddering sigh and his posture relaxed. 

Perfect.

“I might now have such skilled hands as the honored Sect Leader Lan, but I would be happy to give you a humble massage.”

Xichen tittered in small puffs of laughter. “Please, A-Yao, you know the quality of my massages first hand.”

Jin Guangyao chuckled too, very much aware of how the widely known Lan arm strength has both its blessings and curses, and unfortunately the Lan couldn’t give a proper massage to save his life. Jin Guangyao patted his hand, voice and action completely full of condescending. “It was simply a matter of tasks. We both agree to have found enough uses for your strong hands posteriorly.”

It was very endearing how, after feeling how Xichen’s hand clamped forcefully on his waist in a “massage”, Jin Guangyao lost every last thread of control (in his defense, those days had been difficult in more ways than one can explain) and yet it was the Lan who kept blushing every time he mentioned that changing moment of their past. Absolutely endearing.

Jin Guangyao tried to not show too much smugness at it. For the way Xichen turned and by his contesting tune, he wasn’t very successful. “We found plenty of your hands’ abilities as well.”

There were some perks in growing up in a brothel, after all. 

“A-Yao is perfectly skilled in plenty of the seven arts. There is no doubt of his ability handling a sword, reciting poems and declaiming beautiful stories to lucky ears,” the leader turned around, exaggerated a sigh leaving his lips and took his brush back, dipping it in ink. “How mean is to use such talent to tease his poor Huan.”

Jin Guangyao kissed his shoulder again in apology, a grin playing on his lips. They fell into a comfortable silence.

He did a quick work of putting Xichen’s hair into a long and loose braid, giving plenty of scratches on his nape that kept pulling tiny and happy muffled sounds all while, celebrating quietly the new gained free space for him to work with. After pushing delicately said braid aside and positioning his palms on each shoulder, thumbs meeting in the middle, he began.

Unlike most of the books he had found lying around the brothel, massages weren’t really a very sexy thing for him. Before, he barely was able to relax every time anyone except his mother got close to him, much less if they tried to touch him in any way. After meeting Lan Xichen, he found that even when giving it, his mind narrowed too much on the thoughts of finding each knot to press them until the muscle went lax again, exploring each little spot that would have the other groaning and then relaxing, then exchanging properly between rubbing, pressing and sliding until the tension was forced to go away and Xichen became become a pliant mess under his palms. Without the proper fragrant oil, Xichen wouldn’t appreciate much squeezing and digging anywhere that wasn’t his shoulders (always so tense) and, lately, his lower back (which was a possible result of spending much more time mending discussions and dealing with paperwork) so he would have to be attentive to give each part of his back a proper attention.

With that in mind, Jin Guangyao slides his thumbs on the sides of his spine, getting to his nape and massaging the lovely sensitive skin there, before sliding his thumbs to his shoulders, following the lines to his arms, going back and forth from the base of his neck to his biceps repeatedly, pressing firmly on the muscles and quickly using his palms as leverage so he could rub circles on the, coaxing the stress away. He mixed firm squeezes and lighter touches all around the muscles, quickly finding any stubborn knot and digging on it with his thumbs then (more lightly) his knuckles. After spending a good time on his shoulders, the Jin went down, palms descending next to his spine until they diverted on his lower back, fingers spreading and circling his waist, focusing there with more massaging circles and momentarily squeezes before letting a softer touch guide his hands, palms flat on the skin, the tip of his fingers brushing softly on the skin, back to his shoulders, repeating the cycle until the Jin could feel less and less tension the more he explored around.

A pleased grunt, a bit louder than Xichen would ever allow himself if his guards weren’t down, floated in the room and pulled Guangyao’s mind from his task. The Sect Leader let out a content, long sigh as he pulled himself back to his full height, not so tightly held like before, as he adjusted the papers in his hands. Thankfully, he was plenty aware of himself and the sheer force and determination that A-Yao is when focused on something to not even dare to try to write a single letter during his massage. It was a good thing he still had plenty of paperwork that only needed a superficial analysis and his signature.

Good. 

Jin Guangyao watches the way Xichen rolls his shoulders and then turns around to smile, grateful at him. He huffs a laugh when Guangyao turns him right back around, since none of their work is done and, for as nice as it is to see the Lan soft and relaxed, it would be even better if he finished all his paperwork already so they could better enjoy their afternoon. 

Putting his hands flat on his back, Guangyao began leaving soothing rubs on the skin, receiving a happy humming in turn. The light touch followed the line to his ribs, carefully tracing the spaces and bones there before going up to caress his shoulders and then run down until they could graze his sides. It was a very thin line in letting his touch firm enough to not tense Xichen by mistake and, at the same time, let it soft enough to not press uncomfortably on the fabric and skin, but not so difficult after so many years of practicing. Lan Xichen was always kind (or sensitive) enough to let him know where and how his touches would be better received. The more he continued his careful touch tracing the skin with the tip of his fingers or spreading his palms across the length of his back, the more tiny sounds were fished, the touch bearable enough that the other decided to pick up his brushes and letters again.

Lan Xichen began to blink slowly, falling back to the almost meditative state of writing (at least trades were repetitive enough that he only needed to consult his notes of previous conferences and letters to offer a middle ground with part of the interests of both sects) when he felt two single fingers beginning to circle his lower back, short nails sending a powerful shiver across his spine, making him freeze for a couple of moments before the touch fell into a safer ground. He frowned thoughtfully and finished his last line, movements slower and more attentive. 

Just as he marked the symbol of Gusu Lan on the scroll, closing the correspondence and setting it aside to gather a new one, two pair fingers began walking on his ribs, lightly tracing and scratching their way up and down and-

“A-Yao!” He tittered, putting the new scroll of correspondence to the table quickly as he tumbled away from those playful fingers.

“Er-ge,” his answer was full of such a limpid innocence that it could be read as nothing but mischievousness. “Is my massage not to your liking? I’ve been practicing a new technique.”

Heat grazed Xichen’s face, and he squirmed, those dancing fingers now drawing soft, tiny spirals across his slides, pulling his lips into a flustered smile.

“Later, please, A-Yao.” His voice tilted into a giggly tune, but Xichen was able to stop it, hands flying to hold those smaller, playful ones in (a bit warning) squeeze. “Let me finish this, then you may…” The color spread even more on his cheeks, and he coughed politely. Jin Guangyao chuckled, then squeezed his hand back, in an agreement. 

“I apologize, er-ge. I shall wait to give you your proper and well deserved reward, without any interruptions or worries.” He kissed his nape, letting the words graze his skin for a moment before moving away. Lan Xichen let out an excited breath he didn’t even realized he was holding. 

The next words were sweeter, in a calm and sincere way. “May I keep touching you? No more teasing.”

Lan Xichen felt such a strong wave of fondness and love that it took his everything, every lesson and rule of discipline and self-control for him to calm down, to not throw those papers away and turn around, catching his A-Yao in his arms and kissing him to his hearts’s content. Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath and squeezed those lovely hands one more time, briefly basking in how they fit perfectly into his own, before letting it go, face still warm and a small smile laying in his lips. 

“Please.” He answered.

Hands once more trailed across his back, running up until he could scratch at his nape and calmly undo the braid, combing the long, dark strand with his fingers and taking every single opportunity to pull more and more content sounds. Since they would still have to wait around a shichen, then Jin Guangyao was going to be sure he kept his beloved one happy and relaxed during that time.

[...]

Lan Xichen was expecting something from him.

The exact thing wasn’t yet clear for Meng Yao to be absolutely sure, but there were a few options already spinning in his mind, going from the naive possibility that Lan Xichen was simply suffering human necessity of being constantly touching someone (probably a result from the deprivation of his sect? For the few things the First Jade of Gusu Lan shared about his home and the plentiful rumors Meng Yao heard, the Lan Sect wasn’t painted in the most touch-feeling type) to the gruesome option that Meng Yao offended him somehow so now he was searching for the most vulnerable places on his body to rend him immobile or dead.

Both options were the far ends of a scale, which classified them as the less likely reasonings to explain the new found behavior, but created numerous options in between that could be more likely. Those last days had been spent in excluding all the wrong ones, which brought him to today. 

Lan Xichen was someone who values his own routine and prefers to not bother someone else with most of his affairs, making him an extremely educated and therefore pleasant to talk to and live with, but an equally private one about his life without a proper and careful prying. The change had been happening for a couple of weeks now, which meant it was triggered by a recent event. Whether it was an external or internal one was something he needed to look into more.

Lately, he has been trying to conduct his little experiments as discreetly and secretly as possible. At first, Meng Yao had thought it was simply a new mannerism or tradition from his sect that he finally felt comfortable enough to fall back into, or perhaps a personal way to express gratitude, something he had become bolder to express as they grew inevitably closer and closer together. That was when his insistent, fleeting touches began, looking for relaxed and non-conspicuous moments to get more affectionate, appearing just as constantly as the brush of color on his face every time Meng Yao showed anything close to curiosity at his actions, searching eyes changing to bashful ones.

Therefore, there were two main possibilities to explain what was happening here. And today Meng Yao was going to rule one out.

Sitting in front of Lan Xichen, with his neck bare and curious hands going here and there to explore, he felt a tiny, hesitant line being traced on his head, a bit too close from his ear and yet much away to provoke anything more than a small shiver that he was already prepared for. Instead of reacting, he tilted his head to the side, being able to perfectly see when Lan Xichen quickly pulled his wandering touch away and went immediately back to combing his short hair, which had been receiving too much attention those last days.

“Xichen-ge,” he would rather use the most adequate ‘Lan-zongzhu’ at the moment, but Xichen always looked more subdued after it. Meng Yao continued to refer to him as this, of course, Xichen would need to get used to it soon and it was best to start now with a single person he trusted than to a doubting crowd later, but his objective, right now laid somewhere else. “Is there something bothering you? This one will do his best to fix it and make your stay much more enjoyable.”

Lan Xichen sighed, dropping his comb defeatedly on the desk and finishing his usual ponytail with ease. 

“It’s nothing important, A-Yao. I apologize for worrying you.”

“There is truly no need to apologize,” he smiled, open and encouraging. “No matter what the problem or doubt is, I will be more than happy to help Xichen-ge with it.”

“It’s really a trivial matter.” Lan Xichen watched his face for a few seconds, all while Meng Yao kept it clear and comforting, keeping all the curiosity that was gnawing at his mind hidden. 

Eventually, Lan Xichen’s own curiosity won. 

“That night when you were brushing my hair, you did something and it made…” He stopped, not very sure of which words to choose, brown frowning slightly in a confused manner. “It was like an itch, somehow amusing. It sparked a different feeling and simply got me curious. I tried to replicate it but,” he chuckled lightly. “It seems like I failed in doing so.”

Sudden clarity hit Meng Yao and all the last pieces of the mystery fitted each other perfectly, creating a clear image in his mind. Reasoning #5 was right after all, who would say. 

“I see.” His smile naturally morphed to something more genuine and slightly mischievous. “In that moment, I tickled you by mistake, ge.”

Lan Xichen brightened. “So that was tickling!” Seemingly catching up to his outburst of excitement, a light blush painted his nose, but he continued his joyful demeanor either way. Good. “I have seen so many descriptions of it before that it really got me confused for a while. It explains why I couldn’t do it myself and why I eventually tried it on you, a bit.” The blush increased and Meng Yao controlled the expression on his face to not stare fixedly at it. “I hope I haven’t caused too much trouble and made A-Yao uncomfortable with my approach.”

Meng Yao thought about all the soft touches that kept following him across the house, the tiny embarrassed grins and vehement requests to comb his hair every morning, the steady hold when he stumbled across a poorly performed sword form, a hand on his shoulder or forearm to bring his attention to some matter. His answer came a bit faster than he would’ve liked. “No. Of course there was no inconvenience for me. Even if I would’ve helped to answer your question sooner, this one is very happy to clear your confusion.” He made an educated pause, letting a bit of curiosity slip on his words. “Has Xichen-ge never been tickled before?” 

“Ah, not much, not much.” His eyes turned away from him and Meng Yao could see the half-truth for what it was. “But I’ve always been a bit curious about it. There are plenty of books that had a few snippets, and it always seemed so fun to me!”

Lan Xichen smiled and Meng Yao could see it, how being so open and joyful but still too far away from the other cultivators that no one would dare to reach to him during their own sparks of playfulness. Hasn't his family ever got into a bit of a tickle fight? Of course, Meng Yao wasn’t in a position to wonder about it considering his own history, yet even his childhood had been graced by plenty of memories with his mother that he treasured more than gold. Reminding of happy moments in between dark days, his features softened.

“It can be quite overwhelming,” he explained, “like your body itself is jumping between a strong urge of laughing and running away and even the quickest or lightest touch can leave a residual feeling that will put a smile on your face. There are the ones who like the feeling of it and who don't, but even so there are some who only appreciate when it is done in a certain way or in a specific context.”

Lan Xichen smiled even more brightly at that. “My instincts haven’t failed me yet, then. You’re ticklish too, aren’t you, A-Yao?”

He chuckled at that, becoming more and more endeared by every passing moment. Who would say such a mundane and fleeting thing would be the one to make the First Jade of Gusu Lan so interested and earnest to learn? It was quite precious to have something to teach him as well. 

“I am. Not that it is very easy to catch me off guard. There are plenty of techniques that are more effective than others.” Playfully, he lowered his head and looked at the other coyly. “Perhaps one day I will tell Xichen-ge which, when he decides to share with me his ones.”

“How knowledgeable is A-Yao. Wise and smart, he truly must carry plenty of experience that could help this ignorant one to understand, if he is kind enough to teach me.”

The tune and words were clearly teasing, with a bit of truth bathed in playfulness and excitement of having his discovery to happen and grow like that, but suddenly Meng Yao could see it perfectly: Lan Xichen under him, answering to his every touch, smiling uncontrollably, laughing completely unashamed, loud and bright, capturing the entire light of the sky in his smile, making all kind of sounds that he would have to repeat over and over again until Meng Yao could engrave them fully in his mind, squirming, trashing around and pleading amidst his laughter, face red and teary, wrinkling eyes staring him full of joy and mirth, glimpse of hidden, velvety skin appearing here and there, showing more delightful spots to explore.

What would his uncontrollable laughter sound like? Was Xichen more or less ticklish than him? There was some unexpected spot yet undiscovered that would pry a surprise reaction and a delicious surprised gaze at him? Was he a squirmer, someone who likes to playfully fight or be chased around, or maybe pliant, who would melt under his touches and make the desire to tickle him more increase? Until where could he make his blush go? How many kinds of reactions could Meng Yao pry from him?

Meng Yao felt his throat go dry and the tip of his fingers twitching uncontrollably for a second. Suddenly being under the other’s eager stare was too much and his mind, as always, quickly jumped to save him even before he processed his words thoroughly.

“You should try another experience first, one that is not so overwhelming and that can help you to grow accustomed to the feeling and reactions that tickling can bring, something that will give you more understanding and leverage before being tickled.” Lan Xichen’s gaze was intense and only years of learning to replace his every instinctive reaction to a more controlled façade could help him hide how that expression of utter interest and determination affected him, making color arise at his face. 

“You should tickle me first.”

[...]

“Oh,” Lan Xichen thought as he realized that was the last page he was supposed to be reading, all the necessary letters written and documents approved or denied, which meant that after finishing the last corrections on this teaching plan, all his work would be finally finished. 

Hm. 

“I should’ve thought this better.”

He felt a single snicker bubble on his throat, ignoring it just as he ignored those brown eyes staring at each of his movements avidly, following the marks of his brush with rapid attention. Distractedly, Xichen tried to take a deep breath to regain his control, but had to stop another squirm when Jin Guangyao’s hands got too close from his side once more, making him shiver and straight his posture even more. Just like the few last documents, as soon as the barely there teasing touch got any reactions, it disappeared back to his hair, letting him concentrate once more on the matters at hand.

Jin Guangyao hasn’t gone against his word once during the entire time and, as Lan Xichen was too occupied with his sect’s matters, he kept a series of soothing touches, squeezes and rubs that would keep his muscles nice and relaxed. Unfortunately, the closer he got to the end of his work, the more his mind was haunted by the conversation they held in the beginning of the afternoon, making his thoughts swirl with what was about to happen. The closer he got to the end of the page, the more Jin Guangyao touched him and the more he could feel each one of his senses in fire.

It also didn’t help, as well, that Lan Xichen could feel A-Yao getting closer and closer to him, bodies almost touching, trails of warmth blooming everywhere those fingers grazed him, instincts shouting in alarm anytime those wandering hands did more than hint how easily they could divert their path to his most ticklish spots and at each breath Lan Xichen felt himself get more and more sensitive.

The anticipation was running wild across his meridians, pulling his mind out of the paper and creating a fruitless, and yet amusing, loop where he couldn’t finish his paperwork because if he did he would be tickled, which increased his anticipation because he hadn’t been tickled yet, making him more distracted at his paperwork, which would then bring him back to the beginning and only accomplished in leaving his mind and body restless and with a stubborn tilt upwards in the corner of his lips.

His focus was so out of place that he felt the exact moment those hands moved away from his hair, letting the braid go and disappearing away from his vision and touch. Warning signals exploded in his mind like fireworks, growing more agitated as more and more moments passed with not even the lowest movement happening. Where would the next place those teasing fingers would land? On his lower back, where only a few scribbling would leave him squirming and giggling non-stop? The back of his ribs, where, at any moment he could be turned into a crackling mess by a bit of prodding and drumming on them? The base of his neck, pulling uncontrollable snickers until he was unable to talk normally? Lan Xichen held his breath, body naturally tensing in preparation for the ambush.

He jolted when a firm touch rested on the middle of his back, going up and down into a coaxing rub.

“Is something the matter, er-ge? I may serve as a second opinion for your tribulation, if you wish.” His voice got closer and Lan Xichen knew he was looking above his shoulder, fully aware of how his writing had been stagnant for minutes and what was actually happening. “It must be really complicated, to have you so immersed in it as you’ve been.”

Lan Xichen huffed, answering the teases in kind. “Perhaps it would do me well to get another perspective of this problem. Wouldn’t you be so kind as to switch places with me, my A-Yao? Come sit at my side and let me take care of your hair as you did, as well.”

Jin Guangyao chuckled softly, a false contrite tune in his words. “I couldn’t possibly, er-ge. This one would never dare to imply he could do a better job than Lan-zhongzhu in the matters of Gusu Lan.”

“Then accompany me for a cup of tea?” He gestured to the vacant space at his side, voice persistent and polite. “You know how much I value your brilliant insights and smart remarks for my decisions.”

“Certainly, er-ge is the most kind.” He lowered his head lightly in agreement, “I will be more than happy to share some of our favorite blends as soon as you finish your work.” 

It felt prohibited, how polite their words were and how Jin Guangyao’s fingers trailed across Xichen’s arms, leaving goosebumps wherever it passed. Yet, happiness filled his heart each passing moment, watching fondly as his touch continued until it stopped for a moment on his wrists, tracing the uncovered skin there before following to his hand and then his brush, carefully adjusting it before moving away. 

“It would be improper, otherwise, to interrupt your responsibilities. After it all, however, I want nothing more than to honor your wishes, every single one.”

Lan Xichen felt once more the heat taking over his features, memories upon memories flourishing in his mind. It was a good thing Jin Guangyao couldn’t see his face anymore, otherwise he would witness the way it formed a flustered, tiny pout at his clear defeat. The Lan accepted it gracefully, however, willing his senses to calm themselves once more and focus completely on the last part of the document, finishing the last commentaries and writing his signature, going through the same steps of folding and sealing with the Gusu Lan seal fully automatically, before he put it on his completed pile, a sigh leaving his body at this.

The very first moment he let go of the document, his mind caught up and Lan Xichen froze in the same position, adrenaline running fast across his meridians.

Behind him there was complete silence, hands appeared, and he followed them with the corner of his eyes, struggling to not start chuckling simply by how excited he was, knowing that they could decide to attack any moment now. But they passed his back, torso and curled around his wrists, soft and kind, a taunting and momentarily illusion of peace. Lan Xichen let them pull his arms back to his lap, resting them there.

Slowly, he followed the path from his wrists to his forearms, only fingertips touching the skin in swirling patterns and drawn circles. They stopped by his inner elbow and lightly, so lightly that his nails were barely tracing the spot, tickled it. 

“Er-ge did it all perfectly, of course. I didn’t doubt it a single second.” A-Yao’s voice made him jolt out of the almost hypnotic daze he got into, following every twitch of those quick fingers, enjoying the still too weak instincts of trying to trash away. “You’re so very skilled, so reliable and responsible, but for now, please allow me to take care of everything.” His blush only got worse, both because of the sincere praise and the fact that Jin Guangyao nuzzled softly the ticklish (ticklish, what a delightful word) spot behind his ear, pulling a tiny and surprised squeak before a couple of tiny giggles.

He fumbled over his words, not yet fully accustomed in letting someone else take his role. “A-Yao, maybe I should-”

A kiss hit his ear and a huffed squeal almost escaped, being controlled at the last second when Lan Xichen pushed his face on his own shoulders, which trembled a bit. 

Trust me, Jin Guangyao wanted to say, words almost spilling along his desire in front of the who mattered the most, let me show you how much I know your every weakness, every reaction, every sensitive part of yours, let me show how good I can take care of all of them. Let me bring you everything you are looking for, all the joy, all the happiness, all the delight, let me pry each one of them from you and lay it all in your hands. Lay all of yourself in my hands. Let me, let me, let me. 

What he said, instead, was: “There is no need, er-ge, I am sure of I want to do. There would be no great honor.” 

How could it be a burden when all my thoughts are you and you and you. “But what about you? Are you sure, er-ge?”

His hands stopped and he adjusted his head to watch the other better when silence began spreading after his question. 

“Please.” He let the word escape, filling the silence for a second.

Was he wrong, after all? But that couldn’t be, he noticed every positive response to his touches, every rewarding sound, the way after the initial instinct of moving away, Lan Xichen went back to press himself once more in his hands, how swiftly the work flooded, how closed lipped smiles kept blooming in his mouth. Could it be that not being able to see his expression as freely as before clouded his interpretations so much?

Lan Xichen’s words cut his line of thought before he could start to backtrack. 

“Only if my A-Yao gives me the happiness of being called Huan-ge, for at least the end of this day?” His voice was playful and his eyes twinkled when they turned around to look at him. Jin Guangyao was helpless for the fond chuckle that escaped him. It was much better than choking in surprise.

Lan Xichen. Lan Huan. Huan-ge. To be allowed to call him by his birth name… Jin Guangyao truly couldn’t be more blessed.

I could call you that for the end of my life.

He lowered his voice and got closer once more, hands going back to the soft scribbles on his inner elbows, slowly going upwards in fleeting touches. In a purr, the advisor replied.

“Anything my Huan-ge wants.”

Even if the offer was his, wide, surprised eyes still found the other’s gaze, blush growing stronger before Lan Xichen quickly turned around, mind still spinning with Huan-ge, Huan-ge, Huan-ge over and over again, only distracted when his hands migrated to his shoulders, going way too close to his horribly ticklish neck. A tittering puff jumped away from his mouth and his shoulders trembled as he willed them to stay down. The hands continued to approach before closing on the hem of his robes, playing with them in between his fingers.

“May I?” 

Realizing what that meant, Lan Xichen melted a bit and only the adrenaline and anticipation kept his muscles from falling on those kind arms. 

“You may.”

Jin Guangyao hummed pleased and began taking off his outer robe carefully, treating the fabric with much more care than Lan Xichen who, much for his demise, was still very bad at washing the delicate fabric without tearing it apart.

He removed the first one, taking off his stash, folding it and putting both on his table. He repeated the gesture, tapping his fingers on the hem of his second, then third robes, always asking and waiting for his answer before he continued. When he was left with his two last robes, Jin Guangyao scribbled lightly at his side, seemingly satisfied at his louder and surprised giggles as an answer and then positioning his hands on his lower back.

Lan Xichen grabbed them and, quietly, guided both to the hem of his robe. “You may. Please.”

Jin Guangyao barely hesitated before removing it too, just as reverently as before and Lan Xichen smiled, patting the last, thin and comfortable, inner robe with satisfaction. It felt much lighter and adequate, completely different from greeting someone so important as his A-Yao with the condecorations of a sect leader. Now he was simply Lan Xichen, Lan Huan, enjoying the surprise Jin Guangyao so mindfully prepared for him.

The Jin grabbed Xichen’s skilled hands once more and pulled them upwards, crossing them behind his neck, making them both get even closer than before. Xichen took the opportunity to kiss his cheek, his ear, his neck and shoulder in appreciation, more than happy at the bold move. 

For his last preparation, he slowly began undoing the knot tying his forehead ribbon, eyes focused and attentive to any slight show of discomfort, eventually pulling it carefully, folding and laying reverently above all his clothes.

“Let me look after you.”

His hands rested on his waist, first only caressing the skin, testing the pressure they would have to apply to tickle the spot, then changing to a soft spidering that started from his sides to the base of his spine, scrapping and prodding at them with quick, fleeting touches that started to bring more and more giggling, dancing on both spots over and over again, leaving his nerves prickling with every teasing tickle. His touch danced across the skin, tracing the line of the waistband of his pants, slipping a couple of fingers under his robe to pinch lightly at his sides, going up and down a few times until his giggles increased to a higher giggles, once or two squeals escaping here and there, especially as he went back to his spine, prodding and poking the bones as he went upwards.

The more the playful touches continued, the more Lan Xichen felt his control crumbling, his reactions slipping easily, delighted noises filling the room as the soft, light and fast tickling just continues, exploring his back with scratches and scribblings that only made him feel more and more ticklish at each moment, each touch teasing just enough to sent his senses into wildness. Every time those dancing fingers followed each bone of his ribs with fluttering and a light clawing, drummed quickly in between them, attacked the lowest parts of his shoulder blades with spidering and pokes, Lan Xichen tried to curl more and more forward only to remember about his position and laugh more. Louder snickers, painted sometimes by surprised crackles, escaped him in waves, arms trembling to not lower themselves, doing the best to keep his torso unprotected. Even the praising, grateful kisses that Jin Guangyao gave his biceps and forearms in appreciation felt like tiny sparks to ticklishness at this point. 

As more and more moments passed and those maddening fluttering and sparsely rough tickling continued, his previous muffled squeaks turned into louder yelps and tittering giggles transformed in an unending onslaught of squealing snickers. Each sound grew more uncontrollable and unstoppable as Jin Guangyao calmly guided his efforts to his armpits, the fingers that were previously attacking every inch of his shoulder blades then walking in tiny pokes and swirls to the spot. Lan Xichen closed his eyes firmly, a giant, wobbly smile in his face as he squirmed the entire way, yelping and chuckling when they finally arrived at their destiny.

His fingers rested on the skin, drawing circles and scribbling softly on the place where his back connected to his armpit, slowly worming their way to tickle it before Lan Xichen couldn’t take it anymore and firmly clamped his arms on his sides, successfully blocking the way, shoulders bouncing with his laughter painted in a mix of excitement and fear.

The shorter one clicked his tongue, but moved his fingers away, nevertheless. It didn’t take long for his velvet tune to find its way to his sensitive ears once more. 

“Huan-gege’s laughter is truly a blessing.” Lan Xichen shook his head, and he nibbled that spot behind his ear in reply, pulling a squeal, giggling and giggling non-stop. “Even if he keeps running from my care. There is no worry, however, I will keep bringing him back as much as we need to, again and again.” 

Finishing with a peck that resulted in even more snickering, Lan Xichen finally realized the distraction for what it was, immediately arching his back the moment his hands began clawing at the tickle spot right under his shoulder blades, pulling an undignified squawk and a stumble that made him tilt and fall on Guangyao’s chest. Warmth involved him from every side, which did nothing to placate the ticklish tingling sensation spreading to his ribs in an unrelenting attack, uncontrollable laughter spilling freely from his lips until he felt a hand on his face, turning it to the side to find those warm brown eyes staring right at him.

“My, my, what a pleasant surprise to find you here, Huan-ge.” 

His thumb began brushing his cheek softly and Lan Xichen guffawed, almost completely lost in the sensation, face and ears hot at the smug shine in the other’s eyes. After discovering that even his cheeks were ticklish, A-Yao always took an opportunity to tease them with fluttering tickles and playful words.

“Nohohot so much of a surprihihise, I belieheve.” He grinned, the mischievousness of it losing partially its sharpness by the utter adoring expression on his face. “I am ahahalways lookihing fohor you, after-aha-all!”

The fingers traced his cheek once more, then moved to his mouth, pressing across his lower lip for a moment. Lan Xichen nipped it and then looked at Jin Guangyao with big eyes, batting his eyelashes. The other huffed. 

“So smooth, Huan-ge.” Still, he acquiesced with the silent wish, not wanting to refuse his dear one anything on this day. He laid a peck on his mouth and moved away before Xichen could try to convince him to change his current plan to different activities.

At the pout he received for that, Jin Guangyao let his hand scribble and tease softly his other (adorably, lovely, addictingly) ticklish cheek, immediately changing it to a wobbly, tiny closed lipped grin. Jin Guangyao hummed, laying more and more fast kisses on his mouth until it opened again into a happy smile and bubbly giggles fell from it freely. 

His fingertips continued to tickle his cheek for a few more moments before it started heading down to his next target, crawling and poking until it arrived to that truly delightful spot under his jaw, lightly scratching on it over and over again, making Lan Xichen’s giggles rise to an uncontrollable chuckling laughter, painted with squeals and snorts as those tickles danced around the spot, his body trembling with the urge to trash and squirm away from the maddening touches.

Jin Guangyao twirled and explored every inch of ticklish skin, sometimes venturing further down his neck, spidering the middle and scribbling his collarbones before immediately going back to torment the previous, truly delicious, spot.

Delicious…

Hm.

Lan Xichen barely paid attention when A-Yao tilted his head closer, using his entire concentration to stop himself from scrunching up his neck and locking his hands and their horrible tickles on the place that made his snickers go higher and squeaky, pulling one high pitched sound after the other, refusing to let his laughter slow down even for a moment. It was only when his chin was held carefully up and a warm breath hit his bare neck that his mind caught up with his partners’ plan, leaving no time to react before his face was burrowed on his skin and those lips began nibbling under his jaw.

A loud shriek filled the room as he instinctively pried himself away from his embrace, laughing and squirming so much he eventually fell forwards, forehead rested on the tabletop as a snorting kind of laughter continued to escape him, only slowing down to a unstoppable giggling at the ghost tickles. Rubbing his neck, he tried to rub the feeling away and realizing with anticipation how this new position left him with his entire back open. More and more titters fell from his lips.

“Huan-ge, you fell.” Jin Guangyao purred, staying in the same place as he watched him with smart and crinkling eyes until Lan Xichen returned his gaze, face bright and a smile spread from one ear to another. He grinned and controlled the urge to attack him again, to turn Xichen around, hold his arms away and once more find his way to the most delicious spots and torment him, pulling joyous laughter again and again and-

He didn’t, of course. It was not the moment yet. For now, all the Lan needed was a little more of building up and tormenting tickles, until the slightest brush of fingertips would leave him drunk in happiness and snickers. 

His foolish urges would have to wait for their moment and keep following the plan.

“Why don’t you come back up, hm?” 

Xichen’s eyes followed to his open arms, fingers wiggling slightly, not even pretending to hide what would come of his fate would he choose to come back to his embrace. He could feel his face burn even more, heat escaping to his neck and ears. His lover had a look on his face that brought goosebumps to his spine, a kind of shine that said that he would patiently wait until the second Lan Xichen decided to continue their playful moment. 

“A-Yao,” there was a hint of a whine at the end of his words. Jin Guangyao clicked his tongue and cooed in exaggerated empathy, as if his hands were tied and there was nothing he could do to save him from his current predicament. “Nohoho…”

“Won’t you come back to me, Huan-ge?” He pouted, looking down and away. “Tell me, does this one’s touch displease you? For you to try to get away from me so determinately, I can only imagine how my advances are not welcome.”

Lan Xichen huffed and groaned softly, recognizing the clear provocation for what it was. “A-Yao, my love, please…”

“A single moment without the presence of my Huan-ge and the cold is too great to survive.” He continued, tone pitiful and sad. “But, if this one truly wronged his Lan Huan so greatly, it must only be fair to endure it.”

Lan Xichen was a weak, weak man, and so he huffed and whined in protest, but straightened up and went back to his previous position, snuggled once more in the most trustful arms in the world, hiding his face in his own hands, his back shaking the tiniest bit with the chuckling, pleased laughter from the other he received in reward.

Every point of contact set his senses at fire and every breath he took in silence, slightly shuddering, was filled with the anticipation of his new attack, his nerves tingling in preparation and expression already losing itself to an uncontrollable kind of giggles that kept jumping joyfully on his throat. 

A couple of seconds, then a pair of minutes passed and nothing happened.

Lan Xichen slowly lowered his hands, just enough to see those offending, wiggling fingers clawing the air, close, yet too far away to even touch skin. The unexpected scene was enough to make him jump and squirm, almost falling into those tickling touches, but managing to stop himself once more, snickering at his own silliness.

“No, no, wait, A-Yao! Wait!”

Jin Guangyao nuzzled behind his ear in answer and his laughter only worsened, even if there was yet no tickles teasing his spots, reactions fueled by nothing more than the adrenaline that made those tiny, ticklish sparks spread from everywhere Jin Guangyao touched or would (probably) touch any moment now. When he decided to move those offending wiggly fingers, possibly. 

Lan Xichen pouted, turning around just the necessary amount for him to see it, receiving a placating kiss and even more nuzzles on his neck as consolation.

“Oh no,” Jin Guangyao gasped theatrically, which only made Lan Xichen let out another complaining noise, still surrounded by plenty of giggles, and bat one of his hands lightly away. “It seems like my Huan-ge is so far away! Too far from my caring touch. What shall I do now?”

“Just dohoho it, A-Yao, pleaahase. Have mehehercy, have mercy on yohour poor Xichen.”

“I would love to help, Huan-ge, but that simply seems impossible, with you being so far away. If only there was someone who could guide my hands to a kinder destination…”

“There is nohot!”

“There is not? Oh, that is truly a pity.” He nosed the spot once more, prying higher giggles. Angling his mouth better, then, Jin Guangyao made sure to whisper the next words directly into his ear. “I would be so happy to find, tease and tickle any and every spot that my Huan-gege would be kind enough to guide me. Anywhere he wants, any spot that would leave him relaxed, content and laughing his heart out and I would stay there, tickling and tickling again and again for as long as you want. Doesn't this sound like a nice offer?”

Lan Xichen snorted, tittering while turning his face away, burning in a newer shade of blush at such lovely teases. He was plenty aware, after everything they had passed together, that there was no escape from his current indecision. Jin Guangyao would keep his sweet words and provocations for hours at end until he caved and decided the next target to his doom, both to his absolute delight and despair. Still, he turned around with a new protesting, sad noise, making Jin Guangyao’s lip twitch upwards before an expression of pure innocence took over his face and he pecked lightly his mouth.

“Won’t you let me, Huan-ge?” Each word was marked by another kiss, on his lips, his cheek, his eyelid, everywhere. Lan Xichen hummed pleased, melting more in the embrace, realizing one of the many benefits of staying right where he was. “Won’t you show me where you want me to tickle you next?”

It took a bit more of distraction, more lingering kisses and sweet provocations, until two strong, yet so delicate, hands gripped his wrists and guided his own to an open neck. Jin Guangyao smiled and kissed his temple in gratefulness, more than happy at the happy snickering he received.

Slowly, his hands moved to rest on his shoulders, thumbs rubbing teasingly the skin, so close to the base of his neck that Lan Xichen could already feel the uncontrollable smile taking over the expression of his face. Even before the hands started creeping closer, his laughing fit was already back, yelps and squeaks going louder and quicker as his hands began spidering across his neck.

“Ahahahaha-Yahahao! Mehehercy! M-mer-r-cihihiHIHIHI!

Jin Guangyao gave a small nibble on his neck, humming in satisfaction at the screech, taking his time to trace with his lips across every little spot, to huff and puff his breath over the sensitive skin and tease with a light, barely there, scrape of teeth every little mole or scar he found in his way, only to go back to nibbling and huffing, changing the tune of the laughter at every little change, making uncontrollable and loud giggles morphing into wheezing crackles, then bringing back to louder titters and start the cycle again.

“So kind of my Huan-ge to let this one be deserving of his laughter, for returning so wingilly to my hug and following so perfectly my instructions, for trusting me like this.” He nuzzled him, pulling a higher joyous squeal before finally giving Lan Xichen his well deserved prize. 

He took a deep breath and burrowed his face in his neck with a giant raspberry.

“AHAHAHA-YAHAHAO!”

Jin Guangyao hummed in question, being sure the vibrations hit the skin and resulted in more guffaws and crackling as an answer. Positioning his fingers once more, he began alternating between scratching and scribbling across his collarbone and fluttering and tracing behind his ears, making his laughter ring loud and free in the air, screeches and wheezes following it happily. Lan Xichen threw his head back, only opening even more space for his raspberries, an advantage that Jin Guangyao was more than glad to use.

After a few moments, he let his tickling slow down enough to a soft spidering, tiny pecks now trailing to the back of his ears, pulling squeak after squeak, making Lan Xichen melt even more on him, words forming and disappearing on the tip of his tongue with the sudden onslaught of affection. Eventually, his hands stopped.

“Please, allow me, then, to clarify a few important points, while we explore new spots at our convenience.”

Lan Xichen was just recovering from his laughing fit when the hands disappeared for a moment and quickly appeared back again on his ribs, mischievous fingers twitching lightly on the spot. The Sect Leader snorted, holding on the other’s arms and looking up, finding his fond gaze, unmoved by his own wide and shiny eyes filled with surprise. Pleas began spilling from him. 

“My A-Yao! Plehehehease, wait! There is noho nee-eek!”

Jin Guangyao drummed on the spot, hands clawing determinately on each space in between the bones and incessant fingers prodding each one of his ribs, pressing on each one of them and vibrating in short bursts of attacks, spreading ticklish sparkles across his every single sense, making the poor sensitive Lan throw his head back with a crackling laughter, thrashing around in the hold.

“Let us start then.” 

No matter how much Lan Xichen shook or moved his head, he couldn’t stop those whispering words to attack directly his sensitive ears, adding a squeaking tilt to his chortles and a bit more of maddening to his mind.

“My Huan-er-ge is the most hardworking, determined and brilliant person I’ve ever met.” Lan Xichen shrieked and before he could oppose anything Jin Guangyao was saying (by a simple confusion, of course) he felt the other’s hands slip and dig on that absurdly ticklish spot right in the bottom of his ribs, almost in his back, making him lose all his words and arch back with a loud crackle. A truly unfortunate event. 

“Your spirit was strong enough to keep both of our hopes alive during the war and then to keep your resilience unwavering even during the fall out of it. Your resolution in what you believe and your kindness that forgives and love so easily form such an esteemed and important partnership that it amazes me until this very day, and will continue to do so for much longer. The first makes you understand the most subtle and important details of political affairs and crucial battles, while the latter keeps you-” (vulnerable, weak, transparent, he didn’t say) “trustworthy and human enough to lead, help and spare the most that you can.”

“You care so much for the ones who are dear to you and work the most to maintain and protect everything that you believe.” At this point, his words had lost all the teasing mischievousness to adoration, a reverence that he could only demonstrate fully when they were soft and unguarded like this. Jin Guangyao began slowing down his attack, changing to spidering tickles that ran up and down his ribs, slipping away momentarily to his armpits and drumming there from time to time, when Lan Xichen tried to interrupt his vulnerable words and then rewarded him with cute snorts and giggly squeaks. 

His voice got even more gentle. “I wish you would let those you love-” (me, me, me) “take care and carry your burdens along with you as well. We would be so happy to do so, as much as you need, for as long as you need.”

Lan Xichen had trashed so much he had lowered himself even more on his embrace, disarranging his robes open, which created the perfect opportunity for the Jin to grin and worm his hands to skitter and pinch the ticklish skin of his sides, pulling surprised, ticklish laughter. 

“A-Yao!” Looking down, all he could find was Xichen’s determined stare, watching him amidst the misty shine of tears that began collecting on the corner of his eyes. “Yohohohou alreadyihihihi do thahaAHAHAT!” Even as the tickling increased in protest, his words persisted. Amidst the crackling and snorts, they aimed directly to his heart. “Tahahahaking sohoHOHO - NOHOHOT THEHEHERE! - MUCH CAHAHARE OHOHO-ohof me! Yohohou d-d-dohohoho it all so eek! SohoHOHO FREHEHELY!”

And Jin Guangyao was weak. So incredibly and helplessly weak and weak and weak. 

His body moved on his own before his mind could fully catch up with it, thoughts running too fast for him to get a strong hold on each of them. He lowered the taller one on the ground, digging his fingers on the soft flesh of his sides until he was laying on the ground and he could maneuver himself to sit on his thighs. In his new position he could see the exact moment Xichen’s face dissolved into that expression full of surprise, fear and delight as he pushed his robes to the side until his stomach was completely bare and he suddenly burrowed his face on his belly.

“MYIHIHIHI LOHOHOVE!”

His hands drilled on his sides, squeezing and drumming, running up to claw at his ribs, then inwards to knead at the corners of his stomach. Each new touch and tickle made the other shriek, loud, belly and mirthful laughter painted in wheezing screeches and snorts, filling the entire room with the force of it and making the other arch, which only burrowed him closer and closer to the playful attention. Jin Guangyao nibbled each weak spot he could find, blowing raspberries directly on his belly button, pressing kisses and whispered loving, praising words on his lower belly, following his waist with nibbles, nipping the sensitive places of his hips, raspberrying the trembling spot non stop. 

After lavishing every single inch with all the nibbles, kisses and raspberries he could deliver, Jin Guangyao started to ascend. His hands slowed down their tickles, changing to a scribbling and spidering kind of touch that started on his lower belly, tracing the line of his waist, the bones of his hips, before climbing slowly up.

“So precious.”

He kissed a trail on his chest, completely unfazed by how it trembled and shook under him with all the maddened snickers that continued to spill.

“So strong.”

Lan Xichen hugged himself, hiding his face on his shoulder while the light tickles kept his nerves aflame. Tiny squeaks and high pitched sounds continued to escape him, growing quicker and more uncontrollable the more Jin Guangyao got closer to his target. 

“So responsive.”

His hands slipped to land a quick squeeze on his inner thighs, immediately making him squirm from one side to another.

He kissed the spot right below his collarbone. Then waited.

Lan Xichen snickered and giggled and wiggled around, smile growing bigger and wobblier the more moments passed without another whispered, sweet word from the other nor a kiss that made his muscles be torn between melting into the touch or escaping away from all the tickles. His hands were now resting on his waist, keeping it nice and snug in his hold, preventing it from squirming away from their inevitable fate. 

Jin Guangyao watched his every expression, every twitch and giggle avidly, making the heat consuming his face spread to his chest and his eyes to shut even more tightly, plenty aware of the kind of gaze they would find as soon as he reciprocated it.

Except for his increasing titters, nothing else took over the air around them. After minutes passed without anything more, Lan Xichen huffed and opened his eyes, finding that adoring, reverent, hungry gaze watching his every expression, a fond grin turning into an evil smirk that made goosebumps run across his spine and his snickering to increase.

Slowly, without any hurry or worry in the world, Jin Guangyao began lowering his head, eyes fixated on him.

“A-Yao!!” His squirms failed to escape his tight grip, which was not helped for the way all his muscles felt like wet wool. “Please! Plehehease, anythihihing else!”

“So sensitive. So ticklish for me.” Jin Guangyao continued, a low, pleased tune taking over his words when the mirth shining on Xichen’s eyes and the excited squirming only increased at the teases. 

His mouth brushed his neck, next word hitting his skin into a mix of airy tickles and a spark of electricity.

“Perfect.”

Before Lan Xichen could protest anymore, a gigantic raspberry hit his neck, the vibrations leading to another shriek and louder laughter, a high crackling one that left his entire body shaking from the force of it, his head thrown back as squeals, screeches and chortles escaped merrily from his lips. Jin Guangyao followed his every squirm and movement, his hands spidering up and digging on his armpits, drumming on the spots as mercilessly as the raspberries continued to torment his every nerve, intertwined by nibbles and nips that would be prying squeaks and snorts from his lungs. 

Not a trace of his torso was forgotten. Tiny raspberries rested at the crook of his neck, nibbles attacked every spot from under his chin to his jaw, and fingers danced across his armpits, scratched at his ribs, pinched his sides and drummed on his hips, spot that suddenly would be graced with one or two raspberries to tint his reactions in surprise. Not even his thighs, which were graced with so many squeezes and kneading that made him kick and try to roll around fruitlessly, weren’t spared from the onslaught of tickles, each touch teasing his most weak and sensitive spots to latch on and torment without a mercy.

Lan Xichen laughed. He pleaded, snickered and crackled without a single thought nor coherence, mind too much taken over by the overwhelming sensations, by the feeling of joy and happiness that filled his chest like nothing else mattered, by the ticklish tingles and vibrations that teased his every nerve, that danced across his mind and at which he couldn’t ever look away. For a moment, no worries from his position, no exhaustion from his work or fears of the future existed. There was only Jin Guangyao and his perfect, merciless tickles, his unending laughter and warmth all around. 

Before it got too much, Jin Guangyao stopped, being intrinsically aware of Xichen’s every quirk and tell. The Jin laid a last kiss on his neck, chuckled at the tiny wiggle it pulled and then moved closer to his face, his smaller hands cupping it and wiping the few tears away with such a care that it was as if he was handling the most precious treasure of all the cultivation world in his palms.

They spend all the while his remaining snickers filled the air like that. 

“It’s so dark and cold outside.” Lan Xichen said, when his voice was back and he could say more than one syllable without remembering what happened and falling once more in titters. He pulled the other closer. “Wouldn’t my A-Yao be kind enough to let this one stay for the night?”

Jin Guangyao huffed, amused. 

(As if he wouldn’t let him stay for the rest of their lives.)

“Of course. Such an esteemed guest of the Jintali Sect deserves only the utmost hospitality from this lowly advisor.” He laid a kiss on his forehead, right where his forehead ribbon would be and Lan Xichen hummed happily. “After all, what would say the rumors after seeing Sect Leader Lan getting out of my room in such a disheveled state in the middle of the night?”

Lan Xichen replied with a peck on his cheek and a playful light pinch on his side. “Nothing worse than they will speculate tomorrow, surely,  after discovering I spent the night with you.”

“Then I will take care of them accordingly.”

Lan Xichen turned his face around, kissing his palm in a quick distraction moving before he was worming a couple of fingers mischievously once more on Jin Guangyao’s side, making him get out from his place on top of him and move away enough for them to get up.

Amidst the playful remarks and softer words, both of them prepared themselves for the night, eventually slipping on the bed together. As soon as Lan Xichen snuggled on his embrace, happily burrowing his face on his chest and pulling Jin Guangyao even closer, he could already feel the sleepiness start to drag his eyes closed.

A hand deliberately rested in between his shoulder blades and Lan Xichen hummed in question, feeling a pleasant shiver when the fingers began softly tracing the spot. 

“May I?” Jin Guangyao whispered.

Lan Xichen smiled and sighed, content, fulfilled, happy. He nuzzled the chest under him, laying a peck on his shoulder.

“You may.”

His other hand tangled on his hair and began scratching his scalp, a thankful kiss being delivered on top of his head. 

The low, whispered words that filled the air no longer carried a teasing tune, but a quiet vulnerability and adoration that shone in each letter. 

“There is no bigger honor in the world than to be allowed to have you in my arms, er-ge. to be granted the opportunity to take care of you, to pick each one of your reactions and vulnerabilities and then pick you carefully apart so I can give each little piece the attention it deserves and rearrange them all together.”

His hand began drawing tiny circles across each one of his shoulder blades, a single finger teasing momentarily the awfully ticklish spot under them before dancing away to a safer ground. Quick puffs of titters escaped from Lan Xichen, who only melted even further on him, the touch soft enough to slowly lull him to sleep, words forming and disappearing on the tip of his tongue at the affection. 

“When you let me explore and find every single one of your tickle spots, to discover your most favorite teases and let me use them on you over and over and over again.” A finger worms its way to scribble across his collarbone, another hand goes up and traces the outer shell and behind his ear with the softest tickles, making his smile and let out a single giggle. “Every time you give me all your weakness, your trust, your smile, your reactions so willingly, without a second thought, I want to give you in return all my heart, all my reverence and attention until I can make you the most happy, content, relaxed, joyful you can be.”

Lan Xichen titters and hugs the other firmly, the giddiness spilling from his heart to his actions, making him lay soft kisses everywhere they could reach, getting slower and slower as the tiredness begins to take over. 

Now the tickling was nothing more than a soft rubbing, a hint to make him a huff a laughter here and there at most, focusing primarily on making him floaty and relaxed enough for his consciousness to begin to slip away, in the rhythm those fingers tapped the back of his neck and scratched at his scalp.

“Thank you, truly, for letting me share this special moment with you, for trusting me, for this, for everything, for you. There is nothing in this world that could make me any happier than to do this with you for everyday of our lives. I will carry every single of your burdens and burn all the obstacles away if this means having you by my side for as long as I can, for as long as you will have me, Huan-ge.”

“A-Yao,” Lan Xichen whispered, clearly losing more and more his battle against sleep, voice slurred. “My A-Yao, don’t forget,” he mumbled and sighed happily, making Jin Guangyao’s heart dance in reply. “I love you too.”

The Jin closed his lips tightly, in order to control the choked noise that almost escaped him, eyes closed firmly as he pressed his lips reverently on Lan Xichen’s forehead. The other was fast asleep, already, and Jin Guangyao chuckled softly and emotionally in the darkness of the night, where no one could see his expression, glad that this part of his soul could be so easily read by the one who mattered the most.

He didn’t say it out loud, of course. And maybe one day Lan Xichen would say this sober and awake and then Jin Guangyao would find the courage to answer him in kind. But for now he let the other sleep soundly and he followed his example quickly. 

But since he was a weak, truly weak man, Jin Guangyao, Meng Yao, mouthed the words on his forehead anyway.

I love you.

[~*~]

Fun Facts and Extra Things!

Me: Hey time to write Meng Yao :D

*adds guilt, distrust, self issues, paranoia and hunger for (safety, peace, importance) blood and LAN XICHEN/ER-GE being shouted internally in love 99% of the time*

Me: Yeah my work here is done. Nailed it.

Lan Xichen being tickled: Noooo, I am simply a little, poor meow meow, won’t you spare me?

Jin Guangyao, THE poorest, littlest meow meow to ever exist: I’m about to destroy this man's whole career.

I almost added like Meng Yao inheriting a fancy and beautiful comb from his mother that he never used before but decided to use in the moment he was caring for Xichen’s hair but the scene of him daydreaming about the life he would have when he was accepted as Sect Leader’s son and all he could offer Lan Xichen after this was stronger to me.

Created an entire lore about Meng Shi in my mind only to realize it was like I wrote an entire AU of Apothecary diaries story rip. Got me thinking about Meng Yao being Maomao uncovering mysteries in the palace with his brilliant mind and Xichen being the eunuch with a dick that catches on to his plans. Anyway peace and love on planet earth. Rip Meng Shi tho she would be even more fckeeed. 

Thinking forever about the implications of a world where Jin Guangyao is accepted and safe at the Koi Tower, when Jin Zixuan is the Sect Leader and so the Jin Sect doesn’t have only Jin Guangyao to relay in. I think that would allow him to come closer to Lan Xichen one day. Maybe he would realize that an advisor is not fully essential to stop the sect from crumbling and breaking apart, perhaps he would look at Jin Ling, growing stronger and healthy and spoiler but caring by the day and would then look at Lan Xichen and would desire. Maybe they could live in a nice, quiet place of Cloud Recesses, when one of the Lan juniors grew enough to inherit the title of a leader.

Meng Yao, upon living with Lan Xichen during three days: Well, even a complete uneducated and socially blind MORON can see that those forehead ribbons are extremely important to the Lans, even if I can’t exactly point how profound that sentiment is, I am still fully aware of it. (Ends up discovering how sacred the forehead ribbon is, what it means and then proceeds to wait YEARS until getting express permission to touch it)

Wei Wuxian after knowing and interacting with Lan Zhan for more than one year: Hey wonder what that piece of fabric in their head is for. Well, since it’s crooked I think I am just going to pull it out and fix it :)) HEY LAN ZHAN!!

Pls imagine that every tickle fic I write with everyone in mdzs being happy is because Jin Guangyao killed his father first thing first and so nothing bad ever happened.

I honestly have no concrete idea for this AU, here Jin Zixuan planned a revolution against his father, taking over and stopping their support to the Wen Sect, which lowered significantly their income and so they fell fastly first. Zixuan was not very interested in going after the power and cultivation Wei Wuxian and Wen Ruhoan had, so even if the Jin Sect still held the war prisoners, he vouched (after Yanlin’s opinion ofc) in letting Wen Qing and the Daifu Wen branch take over the leadership, with plenty of sanactions, which didn’t force Wei Wuxian to turn his back to the Yunmeng Sect and escape to the Burial Mounds, nor expose himself even more to the demonic cultivation and so doesn’t collapse as quickly as before. He and Lan Zhan talked more, with the later visiting Lotus Pier and both of them visiting Wen Yuan frequently. 

The relationship between Nie Mingjue and Jin Guangyao is still delicate but not mortal. Jin Guangyao still has plans to take over the leadership of the sect one day… he just keeps pushing ‘that day’ more and more forward. I still believe Yanli’s death on the canon was a casualty of his choices and that he didn’t really planned it and I like to imagine that being so well treated by her, so very different of how the previous Madam Jin did, together of him not being the leader would actually help a bit to heal that deep yearning of having power to survive. 

The first time he saw Yanli actually fighting for him and against the rumors would seal this (come on let’s be honest here, she has years training how to push brothers together). Eventually Lan Xichen starts to court him and Jin Guangyao convinces himself that being the spouse of a sect leader will bring him the power he wants much more conveniently than killing everyone to the top himself. The biggest problem is that, if needed, he wouldn’t be able to kill Lan Xichen to protect himself. So I let to your imagination if he accepts or not the proposal :D yipeee

The “difficult” times that led him to lose control and kiss Lan Xichen for the first time was that they fled briefly to reunite more small sects and roge cultivators to rise against the Wen, but they kept stumbling on Wen patrols repeatedly on the worst moments, which resulted in them escaping to a safer ground under the most awkward situations. He saw Lan Xichen naked way too frequently and had to share small, tight hiding spots and beds with him. Da boi was STRUGGLING

I think that actually Jin Guangyao is v neutral here about tickling but upon discovering that Lan Xichen loves it he simply does all the studies and research about it and takes upon himself to be the best at it. His er-ge truly deserves nothing but the best

Lan Xichen living under the precepts and rules of not being Greedy and Showing of How Rich You Are so he is used to using cheaper and simpler products all while Meng Yao is: If I don’t offer that man all the BEST the market has to offer He Will Die

[squeaky-n-blushy]

In a Mood

Kanene's Notes: Just a smol little scenario I wrote a few months ago (all the thanks to @squeaky-n-blushy who presented my those silly little blorbos I am rotating them into my mind, studying their interactions like a scientist, watching videos and taking notes)

[~*~]

“Stop this nonsense!”

He dodged another hand flying in his direction, meeting the second one heads on, all while using his utmost control to force his expression into an unyielding, annoyed face. Everytime they held this same song and dance, it got harder to not let even a tiny grin escape in the face of his partner’s brightness. 

"A-Xu, A-Xu,” the fondness and mischievousness dripped like the most delicious sweet from his lips, eyes crinkling in the corner with a delight and determination that followed his every opportunity to tease and push his soulmate’s buttons. “Why are you running from me? Doesn’t my touch please you anymore? Why keep pushing me away when we fought so hard to stay together?”

The leader of Heaven’s Window, the master of the Swift Moving Steps, one of the only three cultivators who achieved immortality, scoffed, pushing his attacks even closer to Wen Kexing.

(If that also meant getting closer to him, face close enough to stare into his eyes, a defying grin pulling up the corner of his lips)

“Hah?! How can you act like you’re not the one pushing me away yourself!?”

Another hand going in encounter with his face, dodged before it could lend a blow. Wen Kexing twirled and pushed, forcing Zhou Zishu to take a few steps back to better leverage, determined in getting him right where he wanted. The fierce and analyzing look he received in answer made his heart sing and adrenaline run like fire across his meridians, filling his senses with the most delighted feelings.

(To have the other under him, squirming and laughing and calling his name with that delightful, addicting laughter that would make his head spin and bring his best efforts into finding and mapping even more spots where his soulmate was lovely sensitive. In every possible way.)

Wen Kexing jumped to the side as a counter attack followed him, as he pushed another blow against the other, suddenly his wrist was captured and his body turned around to be pressed on a wall. His wide eyes found the pleased, smug and searching stare of the other, excited shivers going wild across his spine. Zhou Zishu smirked, sharp, and approached slowly, face getting closer and closer to his until it diverted the last second from his lips to rest impossibly, horribly closer to his ears. 

“But, perhaps, this is simply another ploy of yours to have me closer.” 

He sent his palm to the other’s chest, his soulmate taking the blow gracefully as his other hand came to rest on his waist, a teasing thumb rubbing lightly on his sensitive (ticklish) side, pulling his arm back immediately, a sea of giggles and snickers starting to bubble on his throat.

“Letting me catch you so easily… You’re in a mood, aren’t you?”

Wen Kexing could almost feel the grin against his neck and he squirmed in protest, only to freeze as those two devilish hands squeezed him, barely being able to hold an embarrassing sound from escaping him.

When he was about to break and let those giggles fly across the air, Zhou Zishu let him go, moving away while adjusting his robes, his smirk disappearing into a neutral face and the playful shine in his eyes he was never able to fully cover, appearing in a flash just as he turned away and started to march to the entrance of the mountain, expression serious and unbothered. 

“Chengling should be almost here. I will welcome him and start his training. You should prepare his room, he will run to it as soon as he can to change into more appropriate robes.”

“What?!” Wen Kexing bristled, quickly running to get step by step with his partner, protesting in affrontement. “A-Xu, where do you think you’re going, huh?  A-Xu, don’t ignore me! A-Xu!!”

[squeaky-n-blushy]

The initial stage of getting into a new fandom when you're a writer is THE WORST because i want to write my blorbo my man (Zhao Yuanzhou/Zhu Yan from Fangs of Fortune) being the menace ler I KNOW he would be, but I don't trust myself enough yet to accurately write him and his relationships with the characters I want him to wreck. Sigh.

[squeaky-n-blushy]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! 🥳✨ Wishing you the very best and all the tickles you could ever hope for! Have such a fun day celebrating you!

AAAAAHHHH thank you so so muuuuch YOU'RE SO SWEET!!!!!!!!

[squeaky-n-blushy]

it's my birthday!!! :D happy birthday to me!!!! 🎉🎊🎉🎊

[squeaky-n-blushy]

Ok but what about reverent tickles? The whole "I am obsessed with yout laughter and I can't wait to hear it again." The care and love (any kind) as the person listens the first giggle and gets haunted by it and wants more, when they discover about the other like for tickling, when they take it as a mission to discoover all the favorite spots, the most beloved techiniques and teases and gives it again and again.

What about the whole "I love to learn every new thing about you" so of course they'll learn every detail, twitch and reaction. Tender touches mixing with playful tickles, laughter and giggles mixing with caring moments. Opening your eyes to see an adoring gaze over and over again because if that makes you happy, then it makes me happy too.