spoonfulofasha

[spoonfulofasha]

[AN UPDATE] Passport and Visa for Baby's first trip to India in California

So...the bls phone number "help line" is now disconnected, and the 415 number for the SF location says the mailbox is full and can no longer take messages....BOO!!

We are now postponing our trip to India due to these delays...

[spoonfulofasha]

Passport and Visa for Baby's first trip to India in California

OMG it is such a nightmare that I had to write about it!! The process for getting a passport and getting a visa to enter India for a baby is a long and slow process, which requires a ton of patience.

I found that its not easy to find a clear list of requirements and steps you need to go through, so hopefully this helps:

Passport:

- Go to the post office and ask if they do passports. If so, make an appointment.

- Grab the "New Passport" form at the post office (not the renewal form).

Things to bring to the passport appointment:

- Filled out "New Passport" form

- Mother & Father (if you cannot have both parents present, you need to request another form (consent form) from the Post Office, get it signed by the absent parent and notarized.

- Baby (ready for cute passport photo)

- ORIGINAL birth certificate

- Credit card/cash/check

That is all you will need to apply for the passport.  They will take the baby's passport photo and have you take an oath, and then you have the option to pay extra for expedited if you'd like.

I did expedited and it took about 2 weeks to get to me...so onto the next battle - getting a visa for India.  The Indian Consulate has outsourced processing of applications to a really incompetent firm called BLS.  Here is their awful website: http://www.visa.blsindia-usa.com/index.php - you need to click on the type of visa you want to apply for (in my case it was tourist), and then fill in the fields for which office and passport you have and then it returns another pretty confusing page of information.

Bottom line is that you need the following items sent:

- Filled out online application, printed, with baby's picture, BOTH parents signatures on BOTH pages, NOTARIZED

- Baby's passport

- Copies of parents' passports (main info page with pictures)

- Proof of address - this can be  your DL, or if you have a utility bill that will work.

- Original birth certificate for baby

- "Order Form" this gets emailed to you after you have filled out the application

- Shipping label - this also gets emailed to you after you have filled out the application - this needs to be taped to the OUTSIDE of the envelope you send it in.

- Money order or Cashier's check - mine was for 157.70

- Return envelope with pre-paid shipping

So you mail all of that in and to see the status, you use your Order form number to look it up. Mine said processing within 48 hours for about 2 weeks till I finally called and had a frustrating conversation with someone who could not find the application record in the system at all, and finally the line disconnected, so I called back and the person COULD find it, but said I was missing some stuff (I had sent in the app without the father's signature), so they gave me a guy's email address to scan my husband's signature and send to which I did.  Since then, the status has still remained as processing within 48 hrs.  

I will post again when I finally get through this process!!

[spoonfulofasha]

Sleep training?!

So I am TIRED! This baby is feeding every 2 hrs at night, and I’m not sure how it happened, it just did. At 4 mos old she was sleeping through the night and now it’s seven months she barely sleeps at all! In fact half of her daily feedings happen at night. Not to mention, she is teething, and has a hard time going back to sleep after the magical hour of 3am…. I gotta say, hearing her cry kills me but… Is it time to try sleep training again?

Well I wrote that about a week ago, and a lot has happened since!  We did decide to sleep train Asha....and we did a ton of prep and lots of research.  I first tried to wean her off the bottle at night by putting less and less formula in the water, until she was drinking almost entirely water, but she not only STILL woke up for it, but she also got up more because of how hungry she was :(

We kept trying to figure out how to gently wean her.  We read books and articles and called friends and posted on fb...in the end the thing everyone kept echo'ing, was just to let her cry and fall asleep herself, and she would soon learn to sleep and stay asleep longer and longer...she would also naturally just begin to feed more during the day due to not feeding at night.  Well, this seemed terribly harsh and we still resisted.

I should also mention that when she was 5 months old (shes 7.5 mos now), we tried sleep training her using the pickup/putdown method.  It was a 10 day ordeal in which she cried, i cried, my husband and I fought a lot, the baby lost her voice, and we finally just gave up!!  Because this gentle approach didnt work for us, doesnt mean it doesnt work at all, I think it just really confused her that we kept picking her up and getting her calm and drowsy, only to put her down again and she would cry until the next pickup.

So...this past weekend, we decided to bite the bullet and do CIO with checks.  So, we would put her down drowsy, then let her cry for 3,5,7,10 mins etc... at each checkpoint, we would say some re-assuring stuff "Asha, mommy is here, you are not alone. You have to learn to sleep by yourself, I love you" and then exit the room.

So...this is how it went:

1st night: She cried a total of 27 mins, which means we went in to re-assure her/soothe her 4 times, and after that she fell asleep before the next checkin!  She then woke up at 11:30pm (her normal feed time) and cried again, but for 16 mins.  At 3am she woke again and cried for 2 mins and then fell asleep.  I wanted to dream feed her at like 11, but we thought we would just go by the book at least for 1 night and see if she really needs to feed or if she would feed more the next day.  It was all heartbreaking, but I have to say, I was soo impressed! I thought it would be hours of crying and we would finally cave in.  I guess I under-estimated my lil girl!

2nd night: She went down after 15 mins of crying (3 checks), and then cried for 2 mins at 12:30am, then slept till 6am!! TOTAL ROCKSTAR!! That day she did take more ounces, but not enough to total what shed been having with all the night feeds.

3rd night:  She went down without a fight - just went right to sleep at bedtime (730)...but this might have been the roughest night, because i wasnt expecting it, but she cried every hour starting at midnight..that was the longest - like 20 mins. Then she cried every hour for a couple of minutes until probably 3 or 4am.  I kept freaking out, thinking she was hungry and teething, and needed us...but my husband (whom i despised at the time for this) kept me from going and scooping her up or feeding her! She made it through the night, woke up at 7am.  I half expected her to be angry with us, or be super hungry in the morning. But...she woke up with a smile as usual, and had only 3oz in the morning.

  Tonight will be night 4...not sure what to expect...but one thing I dint recap was that we also followed suit for daytime naps, for which she has been doing quite well - crying a max of 5 mins.

[spoonfulofasha]

Anne Morrow Lindbergh Quote

So, I never quite understood before having Asha how I would continue to care about everything in my life and also have a baby whom I could only imagine would also take up loads of time, effort, love, affection and concern.  Also, how do you have a first baby and love them so much, like you cant even imagine life without them, and then go have another one and love that one just as much?  How can you have SO MUCH to give from nowhere?

While I was pregnant, I didnt have the "bonding" feeling with the baby.  I kinda just went about it thinking of how it all affected me (yes, I am selfish!)  I thought of her as an "it" that would come and tear my life apart and it would be the end of all my independance, and I would be tied down longing to be free...

So, I asked my best friend (mother of 2 adorable kiddos) how she does it!  She told me about this quote from Anne Morrow Lindbergh, and explained it to me...

At the time, I still didnt quite understand, but I was certain that since so many women had done this for so many centuries, that it would just happen and probably change my life for the better!

I know this is a super mushy thing to say...so brace yourself...but the quote couldnt be more true.  I am able to love my husband, my friends, my family the same, and love Asha almost too much!!  I guess you are never really ready to have a baby - I sure wasnt, but now that she is 7 months old and blowing my mind every single day with what she can do, I realize that you dont have to be ready before you do it...you just have to believe this one thing - it WILL probably change your life for the better :)

[spoonfulofasha]

“Only love can be divided endlessly and still not diminish.”

Anne Morrow Lindbergh