sparring-with-a-pen - Tumblr blog

[sparring-with-a-pen]

The Music in My Head

This is the first part of a short story, working title The Music in My Head.  It is about a young man approached about having experimental tech put into his brain to help with his psychological disorder.  If you did not read the initial post of this blog, everything here is being done as a writing exercise to practice my writing, and will be rather raw, unedited, and often typed from a phone.  Point being:  Its not going to be perfect, and possibly won’t even be good.

They approached me as I was leaving my therapist's office. I was 16 years old, with shaggy hair and a body that was blessed with a good metabolism but little effort put into being athletic. I wore dark glasses and slightly baggy clothes with the t-shirt turned inside out. I did not want to be a walking billboard for a brand, to show allegiance to an entertainment franchise, make a political statement, or give a nostalgic wink-wink through a half-clever combination of two separate nerdy properties. In short, I wanted plain shirts. As I felt no need to pay much for these, I mostly wore hand-me-downs from garage sales or thrift stores. Sure, my parents would have bought me new stuff, but I insisted they didn't.

They were both middle aged men. The younger was white, almost as white as his coat, probably from spending so much time under fluorescent lights as having Caucasian parents. The older one looked to have had at least one Indian parent, but for all I know with my limited world view at the time, he could have had ancestry from any of the nations in that general region. Thinking back, he probably wasn't mixed with white ancestry at all, just bleached by years in a science lab with the same artificial lighting that gave his colleague his unflattering complexion.

What stood out to me, and maybe what made me trust them, was that they were clearly not the marketing team. They were the brains; the very men who developed what they were selling. They knew what they were talking about, and they believed in it. They were sincere. But that's probably not what I would have questioned either way. No, it has always been a singular query stuck in my head.

Why these men in white chose me I still don't fully understand. They gave me some reasons why I would be a good candidate, but that doesn't explain "Why Me," which I asked multiple times. I was an male adolescent schizoid. Being an adolescent, I should be filled with emotions. Being male, I probably have little understanding and recognition of my emotions. Being schizoid, I show no emotion. I would say I have very little or mild emotions. They want to believe I have them, I just don't show them, and maybe don't feel them but that I definitely have them buried way down inside my soul. Or some shit like that. Whatever. That wasn't enough of an explanation to so me from constantly wondering, "But why me? But, Why, ME?

I asked them about some of the other kids I had met that also had personality disorders.

"What about Tommy Middleton?" He goes to my therapist also. He has problems with emotions."

"He has problems regulating his emotions. He is bipolar. He might be a candidate in the future, but it could be too dangerous for him. It might push him in the wrong direction and push over the edge. A lack of emotions is better for this trial."

"What about Sean Jefferson? He was kicked out of my school and is seeing a therapist as ordered by a judge?"

"That kid is a sociopath: I'm not going to work with him," the other gentleman exclaimed.

The one that seemed in charge, the one that was doing most of the talking, gave him a stern look, and then followed up with a more professional explanation.

"We are aware of Mr. Jefferson. He does not yet have an official diagnosis, but others have commented on their concerns of him showing signs of antisocial personality disorders."

I interjected. "Means he has no emotions, doesn't it? I saw him bullying a kid once, his eyes were cold and dark. I've never seen eyes like that"

The man continued. "People with antisocial personality disorder have emotions, they just don't often have emotions about other people. And before you ask, his girlfriend wouldn't make a good candidate either. Schizotypal, obsessive-compulsive, histrionic: money of these are right for this test. We need schizoid. We need you."

After a dramatically long pause, where they were both staring at me expectantly, and I looked back at them with a blank, uncaring face, the other one spoke up again.

"Look kid, could we cover another candidate? Sure we could. But we looked over serval, and you are the one we chose to work with. But it's up to you. We weren't even supposed to come to you directly, but Jensen here wanted to talk to you first. Ultimately, it's your choice."

Jensen took over again. "The thing is son, I didn't want your choice to be influenced by your therapist, or filtered through your parents. This is all about you, and what's going to go on in your head. Legally, you aren't old enough to make such important decisions. Medically, they would say you are also not mentally capable. I disagree. I think you are the one who lives with this disorder and you are the one who will live with our device in your head. And I think teenagers are perfectly capable of knowing themselves and of sitting down and thinking things through when they need to. So I want this decision to be yours first."

It was almost a moving speech. I suspect others would have found it to be. I did appreciate the respect, though, and so I showed them respect in return. I listened to them explain the process and the device. I asked questions, and they answered them plainly. I left feeling like I kind of understood what they wanted to put into my head. I agreed to think it over and meet back up in a few days. In the meantime I had to decide: Do I want to have a prototype neurological implant connected to the parts of my brain that registered audio stimuli and remembered music?

[sparring-with-a-pen]

Pregen Character:  Nadi Korbtino -- Togruta Thief

Having been one herself, she also has a strong belief in treating servants and staff fairly, and giving them a chance to overcome their situation.  This means she also tends to be a pretty fair tipper in those situations...when she has the means.  While she is generous, she does believe one needs to earn other people’s hard-earned money, just as she did.  She was never given anything without having to earn it first, or pay for it later.

Nadi Korbtino was orphaned at a young age and eventually found herself under the care and employ of Gretta the Hutt.  She trained as an entertainer under Gretta’s other entertainers.  They weren’t exactly kind, but it did toughen her up.  She also picked up a few skills from all the scum and scoundrels passing through.  By the time she reached adulthood, she was all ready for a promotion.  Gretta started sending Nadi around the galaxy as an entertainer, but also as a smuggler.  She would smuggle something in, do a show, smuggle something out.  All was for the Hutts though; she was owned.

Nadi complained, so Gretta was kind and offered her independence--full independence.  No more bookings, no free travel, no free housing and food.  She had very little of her own...at least according to Gretta.  As matter of fact, Gretta claims Nadi owes her for years of taking care of her.

On the bright side, a frequent guest of Gretta’s offered Nadi a ship on loan, which she could slowly pay off as she took jobs.  This man is Petra Balay, a Neimodian who worked in legal trade.  While older and a bit off putting, few men in her life weren’t.

The money she doesn’t truly care about.  She has never had much money.  What she really wants is the respect of Gretta the Hutt as a smuggler and thief, and her true freedom as a smuggler and thief.  She wants to be like any other free man, choosing to smuggle and steal for the money and the self satisfaction of it, not because they have no other choice.  What Nadi doesn’t realize, is that this is what every other smuggler and thief wants too.

Starting Specs for Nadi Korbtino, Togruta Smuggler -- Thief

Characteristics                                      Skills

Brawn 1                                                    Coordination 1

Agility 3                                                    Deception 2

Intellect 2                                                 Perception 1

Cunning 3                                               Skullduggery 2

Willpower 2                                             Vigilance 2

Presence 3                                             

                                                         Combat Skills:

                                                                                                                        Knowledge skills:

                                                           Underworld 1

[sparring-with-a-pen]

In the Meantime:  Character Creation  --- 13-OB, Droid Pilot

Well, I still haven't found time to write. My retail job still works me constantly, which leaves me with little time to practice writing. I still have family and regular life stuff too. I have, however, been able to look over some characters I created for Star Wars Edge of the Empire roleplaying game, with some interesting backgrounds I wrote/am writing. I decided to post those. Feel free to use as is or alter to use. Or just check out the background for a short interesting read.

Note: A large amount of these characters are based on characters from pop culture, but sooner are completely original.

Background for 13-OB "Bob" the lonely Droid Pilot

13-OB is a custom droid built by a Rodian named Odwell Boovaneto, consisting of the head of a protocol droid, legs of a battle droid, arms of a pilot droid, all attached to a custom designed torso. As the previous 12 droids built by Odwell, 13 was named after his creator, O B, but was nicknamed “Bob.” Few outside of Odwell himself ever called 13-OB “Bob,” as most sentient lifeforms are more comfortable sticking to a droids model or serial number than any given name. But Bob’s and Odwell’s relationship was more than just property and creator. Bob was treated as an equal and was even the co-pilot on the ship which he now currently possesses. But with his partner and creator now dead, this droid is left to his own demise. Knowing nothing but a life as a co-explorer and wanderer, it now travels the far reaches of space simply to gather “data,” and to find creatures in need of his knowledge banks--ones who are also willing to pay for this help, of course. After all, he has to pay for the ship’s maintenance, a skill he did not acquire from his maker.

Unfortunately, having little legal rights as a droid, 13-OB is not the rightful inheritor of his partner’s ship, despite the fact that it was treated as a partner, not property. Any fringer would recognize a first mate’s claim of inheritance, but most legal systems recognize a droid crewmember as property to be inherited instead of inheriting. Family members, although distant and with little love for Odwell, claim rights to both the ship and its droid co-pilot. They have even put an award out for returning 13-OB and the ship home, and have sent one of the family’s droids out looking for 13. This droid was Odwell’s previous creation, 12-OB--nicknamed “Rob”--which he created to be a security droid for his family back home.

After returning Odwell’s body to his homeworld, the family attached a restraining bolt to 13. Its memory would have been wiped if a young, rebellious cousin named Deanto did not sympathize with the droid and help it escape. These experiences have been enlightening: Bob never fully realized the blight most droids experience and now advocates for droid rights. Likewise, Bob also now fears lost of its freedom, which it took for granted. However, what it currently longs for most is companionship; 13-OB is eager to feel useful.

Starting Specs for 13-OB, a.k.a. "Bob": Droid Explorer - Scout

Characteristics                                      Skills

Brawn 1                                                    Astrogation 1

Agility 2                                                    Cool 1

Intellect 3                                                 Negotiation 1

Cunning 1                                                Perception 2

Willpower 2                                             Piloting planetary 1

Presence 1                                             Piloting Space 2

                                                               Streetwise 1

                                                              Survival 2

                                                          Combat Skills: 

                                                              Range Light 1

                                                          Knowledge skills:

                                                            Core Worlds 1 Education 1

                                                           Outer Worlds 2 Xenology 1

 Talents

Starting Items

YT-1300 Freighter

General Scanner (built into 13-OB's head)

Specs for rival, 12-OB, a. k. a. Rob:

Characteristics Skills

Characteristics                                      Skills

Brawn 1                                          Astrogation 1

Agility 2                                          Athletics 1

Intellect 3                                       Computers 1

Cunning 1                                        Perception 2

Willpower 2                                   Piloting planetary 1

Presence 1                                      Piloting Space 1

                                                      Mechanics 1

                                                      Resilience 2

                                                         Combat Skills:

                               Brawl 2             Range Light 3

                                                 Melee 1

                                                         Knowledge skills:

                          Core Worlds 2

Talents:

Adversary 2. Brace

Body Guard. Durable

Quick Draw. Resolve 2

Targeted Blows

I also gave it a special ability that decreases the difficulty twice to pick up on 13-OB on his scanner, or (more often) increase the difficulty for 13-OB to hide from 12-OB.

Items

I do not have a ship picked out yet, but it does have brass knuckles built in, and a light blaster but into it's right wrist, and an ionization blaster built into it's left wrist, as well as a scanner and comlink built into it's head, and multiple restraining bolts ready for apprehension.

12-OB also brought along a sidekick to help with piloting and tracking, 2-OB custom built astromech droid.

2-OB is rival level with B 1, A 1, I 2, C 2, W 1, P 1, Wound TH 8, and Astrogation 3, mechanics 2, computers 2, and a weaker form of the upgraded scanning for 13-OB. It is equipped with a light source, very short range scanner, comlink, and a cable link with magnetic suction tip for grabbing metal objects at a distance.

[sparring-with-a-pen]

Why this blog?  I need to exercise my writing muscles.

I've concluded that in order to improve my writing skills, I should write more consistently, ideally a 1000 words a day. Experts say it does not even need to be good or edited, to JUST WRITE. It's no different than going out and dribbling the ball around; you just need to get used to it being a part of you. You need to exercise the skill. So far I have completely failed.

This blog is to help facilitate that. A lot of it will probably be pretty bad. Some may even have a wrong word or two if I wrote it on my phone and don't catch an auto-incorrect.

I hesitate to put it online, as in today's culture it is dangerous to put anything out without it being filtered and edited to make sure it won't be found disrespectful to someone. Am I going to write women or homosexuals well? Probably not, but in all fairness I'm probably not writing any of the other characters well either. That's the whole point: practice. And it is dangerous to open that up to criticism, but that is also how you grow and improve, so hopefully people stay constructive.

Anyways, hopefully I will have stuff up soon. If I can ever find enough me time.

Edited: Also, I will probably often be writing on my phone a lot, which means a lot of bad autocorrect and misspellings.