spacemandoodles

[spacemandoodles]

Avengers High School AU

based on this post of mine

At a Party:

Clint: Here's a drink Pete

Tony: *takes solo cup from Peter* You idiot, he's underage!

Clint: So are we dipshit

Tony: *Chugs Peter's drink*

Clint: Whatever, I'll get him a lemonade

Tony: *Chugs his own drink*

—

Natasha: Steve I saw Tony heading for the janitor's closet

Steve: Okay?

Natasha: With Clint

Steve, sprinting down the hall: NOT THE TOILET PAPER BARTON

—

Bucky: Would you like to go out sometime?

Natasha: No

Bucky: I respect that. *Turns to Sam* would you like to go out sometime

Sam: Wait—but you just. What the hell man

Bucky: I'll take that as a no. *Turns to Clint* would you like to—

Clint: Fuck yeah

—

Tony: Did you hear about the fire in the chem lab?

Steve: Tony, what did you do

Tony: It wasn't me this time!

Steve: Oh. That's new

Tony: I mean I did text Bruce the calculations, it's not my fault he didn't see the decimal

Steve: Tony!

—

Natasha: And that's why I transferred in the middle of last year

Sam: Isn't that like...a crime

Natasha: Nobody will believe you.

Sam: What? What do you mean by that

Natasha, disappearing into the crowd:

Sam: What do you mean by that?!

—

Peter: Hi Captain!

Steve: You know only the football team calls me that Peter. I'm not your Captain

Peter: Yes sir

Steve: I'm only 2 years older than you, you don't need to call me sir either

Peter: Okay Captain!

Steve: No just...whatever

—

Tony: Hey Bruce whatcha reading

Bruce: AH! Oh hey dude

Tony: Wow you're jumpy. You need to relax

Bruce: I don't think I've relaxed once since I met you but thanks for the advice

—

Clint: Do you think Thor was held back?

Sam: Naw man, he's pretty smart

Clint: But he looks like he has a 401k and a mortgage

Bucky: Talks like it too

Sam: Maybe it's a Europe thing, school is different there

Clint: Maybe. Hey Thor! What's up buddy, how's the wife and kids?

Thor: Ay? Um...well? And yours my friend?

Clint: Fantastic! Well it was good seeing you

Thor: Alright then, farewell

Sam: What an odd guy

Bucky: Nice though

Clint: Real nice dude

—

Pepper: Tony, stop flirting with me to make Steve jealous

Tony: Whaaaaat, I would never

Pepper: You very loudly told your table, which is right next to mine, "I'm going to go flirt with Pepper to make Steve jealous"

Tony: Well do you think it's working?

Steve, at Tony's table: No

—

Peter: The decathlon supervisor is already one of my references, and I tutor for Mrs. Warren's freshman class a lot so I have her too. I also volunteered at a special needs camp over the summer, plus I applied for this competitive course where you write a research paper under a university professor for junior year, and if I get it that will look really good on my MIT application. I just hope it doesn't interfere with my internship at Oscorp. What about you, what are you doing to prepare for graduation? Aren't college apps due, like, next month for you?

Bucky: Well my boss at Dunkin Donuts said he'd give me a reference. Chicks in the drive through always tip me well

—

Sam: Why'd you punch Rumlow!

Steve: Cause he was saying creepy stuff about Natasha!

Bucky: You shouldn't have done that man

Steve: What do you mean, he was being a total asshole, I don't care if I get detention

Sam: It's not him you should be worried about

Natasha: Rogers, that was MY punch to throw

Steve: Oh no

Natasha: You think I'm some damsel in distress? Come here and I'll show you a damsel in distress

Steve: I, uh, gotta go *runs out the door*

Natasha: Which way did he go.

Sam: I didn't see nothin'

Bucky: Out those doors and to the left

Sam: Bruh

Bucky: A true friend understands when the consequences are necessary *kicks Rumlow who's still lying on the ground as he walks away*

—

Bruce: What did the racing hot dog say when he passed the finish line?

Tony: What

Bruce: I'm a wiener!

Everyone:

Bruce: Get it? Like winner?

Tony: It's okay man, just stick to academics

Thor: I have one! A priest, a pastor, and a rabbi walk into a bar

Everyone:

Thor: HAHAHA, what a coincidence for them all to arrive in the establishment simultaneously!

*Everyone bursts out laughing*

Bruce: Oh come on, that wasn't even a joke!

Tony: See he has charisma. It's all about the delivery Brucie Bear

—

Sam: Wait, you're saying that the elephant toothpaste all over the second floor right before midterms was you?

Rhodey: Hell yeah it was

Sam: But everyone blamed Tony. Even Tony's parents and the principal. The only reason he wasn't suspended was because the cameras were wiped of evidence, which was also blamed on Tony

Rhodey: Yeah you'd be surprised about how much stuff I do that Tony gets blamed for. Public image does wonders to create bias

Sam: What the hell? I thought you were the responsible one and Tony was your monkey on a leash. Why does he let you blame him?

Rhodey: Cuz he's a good bro. He gets to piss his parents off, I don't get kicked out of ROTC, and then we laugh about it afterwards

Sam: You evil geniuses...

—

Wanda: I want to get married

Natasha: Are you pregnant?

Wanda: What? No

Natasha: Oh thank goodness. Wait, then why do you want to get married

Wanda: Because it's romantic!

Natasha: And the tax benefits?

Wanda: No! Well, yes that would be nice, but no! I want to be a stay at home mom and have a nice family

Natasha: Girl you failed home economics and your type is men who think calling you their "situationship" is making it official, why don't we focus on finding the vertex for now

—

If u like this vibe I have a domestic Avengers "in a timeline where Civil War didn't end in divorce" series as well:

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 :P

[spacemandoodles]

Stony

[spacemandoodles]

[spacemandoodles]

some strawhats being silly

[spacemandoodles]

he is my favorite anime girl

[spacemandoodles]

supple-MENTAL am I right-

I love how fast Jon spiraled between seasons

[spacemandoodles]

More summer vibes!

Same ref link as my zoro post! [x]

[spacemandoodles]

I am gently taking every single hannigram girlie by the face and begging y'all to please read the Dungeon Crawler Carl series

[spacemandoodles]

Dungeon crawler Carl needs more hype because more people need to Get It when I respond to minor inconveniences with MONGO IS APPALLED

[spacemandoodles]

What makes me insane is how Carl is the only one to really understand the AI, even if not fully.

He's the one that figured out that being polite will work on it. He's the one to see it as a person with feelings. He's the one that knows how to negotiate with it.

Like he hates this motherfucker but gets it™

[spacemandoodles]

Watching my DCC posts get notes in an increasingly greater amount is so heartwarming. Like yessss king everyone should read these. Get popular you deserve it.

[spacemandoodles]

My friends are convinced I run a wildly popular blog (I do not) so I've started (jokingly) telling them I'm you

You better fucking watch your back

[spacemandoodles]

basically I don't think jongeorgie had a "you are coming down with me, hand in unlovable hand" kind of breakup, I think georgie was like "okay well I'm swimming to shore but I hope you enjoy your time at sea :)" and jon was like "log day number seven, out on the open ocean... I Have Been Left To Drown." and georgie saw him being sucked into a whirlpool from the beach and thought "what the hell is he doing"

[spacemandoodles]

my problem with getting a grip on elias's characterization is that I always forget the fact that he's sillay. like sure he's evil and sadistic and manipulative and britain's next top victim blamer but also he says things like "yes, if you die, I'm afraid you probably won't be able to claim your expenses." he gets punched in the stomach while being arrested and doubles over in pain and wheezes "ah. I see :)"

[spacemandoodles]

my problem with getting a grip on elias's characterization is that I always forget the fact that he's sillay. like sure he's evil and sadistic and manipulative and britain's next top victim blamer but also he says things like "yes, if you die, I'm afraid you probably won't be able to claim your expenses." he gets punched in the stomach while being arrested and doubles over in pain and wheezes "ah. I see :)"

[spacemandoodles]

Posting this here cause idk where to put it on my tiktok lololol!!1!1!1!

[spacemandoodles]

idk how to describe it but the vibe of the magnus protocol versus the magnus archives is different. tma is like. real and serious scary stories with some levity every so often just so we don't go crazy and start eating each other. but tmagp is almost...silly? whimsical even? there's a man made out of needles that kills people by hugging them. there's the Most Obvious Rich People Are Evil metaphor ever. someone dies from heart failure after getting canceled on the internet. bloodsucking baby. a guy gets eaten by many snakes at once and that's it that's all it is. don't even get me fucking started on mr. bonzo or we'll be here all day. y'all are getting up to some absolute gravity falls shit in here. what's next triangle yaoi?