sourwormz

[sourwormz]

Wilson (Expensive Mistakes) for Anon (plus a previous one) ! Thank you for the request!

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Church // Fall Out Boy

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I Trust Eevee 100%

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make this cool lemon the new meme 

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When you find good merchandise of your favorite series

and then you look at the price

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remember that time yoda mounted luke

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Endless List Of Favorite Characters ➝ Little Sisters

“Who watches over sleeping angels? I do, I do.”

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Sofia Lamb’s speech on herself the Tyrant

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A journey through Bioshock ⤷Chapter IV; Neptune’s Bounty

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when you fail a level 20 times and the loading screen is like “remember you can always change the difficulty setting in the options menu!! :))”

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Customer: why is my total $40?! I only got $1 items!!!!

Me: because you got 40 of them

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favorite ones

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Retail Gothic

“Can you check in the back?” The customer asks. Duty makes you say “I’ll take a look.” You know there is nothing in the back. There has never been anything in the back. There is only void.

Children are crying in the store. Children are always crying in the store. They start when they enter and stop when they leave. You wonder what they know that you don’t.

“Would you like a bag?” The customer is looking at their phone. “My bag is in my car.” Sweat drips down your face. Your hand hesitates. The customer looks up, repeats. “My bag is in my car.” Other customers begin to circle. If you get this wrong they will pounce.

The doors are locked, the lights are off. Something pounds on the front. “Are you open?” You huddle in your lane. Your lips form prayers you dare not voice. “I’ll only be a minute. Are you open?”

Customers look up. As one, they move to the front. A cashier is alone. It is time to check out.

“How are you today? I’m fine thank you.” Scan, bag, repeat. “How are you today? I’m fine thank you.” Repeat. “I’m fine thank you.” Blood drips from your eyes. “I’m fine thank you.” Your smile splits at the corners. “I’m fine thank you. “ The conditioning holds. You Are Fine.

The new person complains they are tired, they need a break. You have worked here for years. You cannot remember the last time you took a break. You cannot remember the last time you ate. There is only work. “The Managers want you.” The time has come. You are being Promoted. You are one of Them now.

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Retail Gothic

A customer pleads to be let in after closing time. They only need one item. They only ever need one Item.

A customer is looking for an item. You do not sell the item. You have never sold the item. You do not know what the item is.

An item does not scan. “It must be free” the customer jokes. You look at them, their mouth hangs open as they laugh. They have too many teeth. 

You ask your colleague how their day is going. They look back at you their eyes hollow and devoid of hope. You nod in understanding. No more is said.

A security barrier goes off. You look around but there is nobody there. There is just noise.

You say good morning to a customer. You hope it is still morning. You are no longer sure how time works. 

Colleagues  disappear as they move on to better things. You do not know where they go but sometimes you see them months later. Their eyes are bright and their smiles real. You know better than to question these things.

There is a man. He comes in every Wednesday. You have never seen him buy anything.

You see an actor from that happy show years before. They are looking at deodorant. They look sad. 

You go to the stockroom to find an item. You look around but there is nothing. The system says you have thirty two. The system always say you have thirty two.

You walk through the warehouse. All you can see in every direction is Christmas trees. It is July.

They ask to speak to a manager. You look around- there are no managers. you cannot remember the last time you saw a manager. What does a manager look like? 

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I’m Brendon Urie and here’s a few things I do better than you wearing Κınky bοοts